


I think I hate you too

by SunnyInnie



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: A little too protective..., Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Attempt at Humor, Break Up, Cute Yang Jeongin | I.N, Emotional Manipulation, Fluff, Han Jisung | Han & Hwang Hyunjin are Best Friends, Han Jisung | Han is Oblivious, Jealousy, Lee Minho | Lee Know is Whipped, M/M, Manipulative Relationship, Minho is kind of a bully, Obsessive Behavior, Paranoia, Possible Character Death, Protective Minho, Rape/Non-con Elements, Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-19
Updated: 2021-02-20
Packaged: 2021-03-02 03:13:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 41
Words: 232,368
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23518243
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SunnyInnie/pseuds/SunnyInnie
Summary: Going to University was something really stressful for Jisung, but having Hyunjin by his side made things easier for him and comfortable. But that didn't last as well as expected when he encountered someone that claims that he hates Jisung with all his heart. Jisung tried to endure it and tried his best to let it go but the main problem was: that sadistic jerk was always there, messing with his emotions with a smirk on his face. No way he could avoid him.
Relationships: Bang Chan/Kim Seungmin, Han Jisung | Han/Lee Minho | Lee Know, Hwang Hyunjin/Yang Jeongin | I.N, Lee Felix/Seo Changbin
Comments: 482
Kudos: 411





	1. First Day Chaos

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoy this fic, I've tried my best to make the plot kinda slow, I was afraid that it was too fast heh 
> 
> Heads up: Later on, in this story, there will be a lot going on ranging from violence, smut, self-harm, blood, rape so I will place warning ahead of time if the chapter has those topics in them.
> 
> once again I hope you enjoy~! and make sure to comment if you want to, I would love to know your opinions on this fic and how you feel about it overall :D

"Is everything okay?" Jisung heard his best friend Hyunjin ask in a worried tone.

He didn't respond, instead, he was seated on the edge of his bed, gazing out the window. Jisung watched the spring rain pouring down from the gloomy grey sky, peppering onto the puddles creating ripples. The sound of the rain was soothing, well at least to Jisung. Today marked the first day of University, and just yesterday they had moved into this dorm on the second floor in this tall five floored modern dormitory building. 

"Jisung-ah, look at me," Hyunjin sighed and Jisung tore his gaze from the window and looked right into Hyunjin's beautiful brown eyes, it displayed seriousness, "Tell me what's wrong? You're not acting like your usual self." 

What's wrong? Everything was wrong. Jisung felt anxiousness occupy his mind, he was too nervous to step foot into University. It would all be so different, different people, difficult classes and probably large-sized classes packed with many students. It was going to be different compared to how high school was, although the high school itself was pure hell, he didn't know how he made it out without any damage. 

"I don't know, I think I'll just stay here, you can go to class without me," Jisung muttered out and Hyunjin's eyes softened a little with understanding before he walked over to Jisung's bedside and sat down next to the blonde male.

"It's okay to feel nervous, I understand how you feel," Hyunjin started, "But maybe it will change once you experience what the first day is like, and maybe your nerves will soon diminish. Plus I want to go experience the first day with _you_ , Han Jisung." 

Jisung looked down at his pastel blue pajama pants with doubt flooding his mind, was everything going to be okay? Should he just fight his nerves and go? As if Hyunjin sensed Jisung's doubts, the black-haired male placed his hand on top of Jisung's hand and squeezed it. The warmness radiating from Hyunjin's hands helped calm down his jumbling thoughts and he looked up in his brown eyes again.

"I heard that the Café not far away from our dorms serves really good coffee, and they have a lot of different deserts maybe even chocolate cake or cheesecake, your favorites, so maybe later today we can go there together after we are done with our first day of classes?" Hyunjin said changing the subject and Jisung's heart jumped at those words. He loved those cakes, it was his favorite food and it never failed to uplift his occasional sorrows. If he were told to write an essay about Cheesecake or Chocolate Cake, he definitely would.

"Let's go then, we can't be late," Jisung said obliging to Hyunjin's plan with a small smile playing on his lips and lifted himself off his bed, heading over to his closet. Since it was a rainy day he decided to put on black ripped jeans, a grey shirt with a black denim jacket on top, and then he found his favorite black beanie and put it on covering up most of his blonde hair except for his bangs he decided to keep out. Well, this outfit wasn't exactly suitable for the pouring rain outside, comparing himself to Hyunjin, Hyunjin was properly dressed for the rain, he looked warm and cozy. 

The two of them stepped out of their dorm after grabbing their backpacks and started heading down the stairwell, and once they were on the last step Jisung smiled mischievously to himself before making a run for it leaving Hyunjin dumbfounded for a second.

"Yah! Jisung-ah! Wait for me!" Hyunjin shouted out and laughed right after. Jisung continued to run through the heavy rain, not caring if the cold droplets seeped into his clothes touching his skin. He could hear Hyunjin trying his best to catch up and heard the vigorous pants the older was letting out. 

"Slow down, will you?" Jisung ignored those words and kept his thin legs moving, leaving Hyunjin to suffer behind him.

"I thought you would have good stamina, _dancer Hwang."_ Jisung cackled.

\--------

He finally reached the cafeteria and walked around looking for the spot his other friend Seungmin was seated at. Seungmin had texted Hyunjin that he would be at University early with his dormmate to eat breakfast early. As Jisung walked his shoes made annoying squelching sounds. He could even feel how wet his socks were, and how the hem of his jeans was soaked from the rain. Maybe running wasn't such a good idea after all, and he knows Hyunjin will kill him once he reaches the cafeteria too.

After a couple of seconds of looking around, he finally spotted Seungmin seated at the table in the middle with his dormmate who has white hair, that person looked quite alluring from a distance and his facial features screamed handsomeness. Smiling to himself, Jisung began walking over to their table but as he was walking, a person with brunette hair was rushing towards his direction causing them both to crash into each other. And because the bottom of Jisung's shoes was still pretty wet he ended up slipping backward and landed hard on his back causing him to wince from the pain, and to his horror, the brunette landed right on top of him, their faces only centimeters apart. Jisung blushed from the embarrassment he was experiencing, and he could feel the student's eyes on him. If there is something Jisung hated the most, it was the feeling of being the center of attention. 

Even worse, the brunette wouldn't keep his eyes away from him, and it was sort of hard looking people right in the eye, especially if Jisung didn't know them well. When it seemed like the other male had come to his senses, he stood up and Jisung did the same and they met eyes again. The brunette had an emotionless expression on his face before a smug look splashed onto his face.

"A pretty blonde boy like you should watch where you are going, you wouldn't want to break your precious little bones, now do you?" The brunette seethed before brushing away the invisible dust from his clothes. Jisung couldn't help but think of him as a cocky person, was he a delinquent or something? He didn't look too nice and friendly. "Next time you bump into me like this, I will make sure you pay for it, it's a waste of my precious time, time is scarce." Jisung tried his best to hold back his scoff. He wanted to mimic back the words the Brunette had said to him, if they were threats it surely was a weak one, it only made Jisung irritated. No way was he going to show fear, he believed fear made one's self weak.

The brunette shot one last glare before he jogged up to his friend who was waiting for him, and Jisung watched as they both headed towards the breakfast line. He noticed how the brunette's friend looked over at him for a second before he talked to the arrogant jerk. 

"Snarky bastard," Jisung grumbled to himself before finally heading over to the table where Seungmin was. Once he reached there he slumped onto the chair and peered at the white-haired male and then at Seungmin.

"You're not getting breakfast?" Seungmin asked.

"Not hungry."

"Where is Hyunjin?" 

"I left him behind in the rain," Jisung smirked in response.

"Yeah, this fucking rascal did," Hyunjin suddenly appeared and scoffed as he sat down next to the blonde. He placed his Strawberry Milk carton down onto the table before taking a bite into his chocolate pastry. He gave an evil glare towards Jisungs who in response let out a laugh.

"What happened to your dancer energy?" Jisung smugly asked.

"Shut it. Just because I can dance well doesn't mean I can run well. A rapper like you can blurt out so many quick words within a certain amount of seconds, so it's not surprising you can breathe well while running like that," Hyujin stated as he opened his milk carton and slid the straw into the open hole before drinking in the pink fluid.

"You sound like Seungmin" Jisung pinpointed, making Hyunjin roll his eyes.

"Whatever, at least I sound smart like him," Hyunjin countered.

"Anyways," Seungmin cleared his throat, stopping the two friends from their bickering, and looked towards the white-haired male, "This is my dormmate and friend, Felix." 

"Hello, I'm Felix, and I'm from Australia, I'm working hard to learn Korean well," Felix said with his deep velvety voice and smiled genuinely. Jisung slightly widened his eyes, he was quite surprised to meet someone who was also a fellow English speaker like him. This University was basically full of students who speak mainly Korean since this is a University in Seoul.

"Hello, I'm Jisung, and I've studied in Malaysia for six years when I was a kid, so I know how to speak English pretty well," Jisung introduced himself in English and saw how Felix's eyes also widened along with his smile. 

"Ohh, it's nice to meet you!" The white-haired male smiled impossibly wider now, making his twinkling eyes squish into crescents. He seemed like an easy-going person to Jisung, and Jisung was pretty delighted to meet someone nice and from a different country. 

"Hey Felix, I'm Hyunjin, and I think you should totally exchange numbers with us, friend," Hyunjin grinned making the Australian let out giggles. Both Hyunjin and Jisung exchanged numbers with him before they ended up having a 'get to know each other well' conversation.

"Seungmin is a pretty cruel person," Hyunjin said, making the said male let out a snicker, "He pities no one and crushes souls with his evilness."

"Well, at least I'm not like Jisung!" Seungmin defended himself and pointed towards the blonde. _What about me? I'm not even cruel_. Jisung smiled innocently and raised his eyebrow waiting for what the younger one needed to say. "He has so much ego, and thinks he is multi-talented."

"That's facts," Jisung declared, "I can sing, rap, write lyrics, produce mus-"

"Cut it out. Why don't you just go to a mirror and talk highly of yourself there, maybe the other Jisung would be pleased to hear what you need to say about yourself," Seungmin sneered, and Jisung was taken aback. Dramatically he placed his hand over his chest and showed mock hurt.

"Maybe the other Jisung loves me more than you do."

"Yeah, yeah, I'm sure about that."

They were all pulled away from their conversation when they saw another student approaching their table. The look on his face displayed concern, he looked rather angelic. And that's when it all hit Jisung, that boy was the one the self-centered brunette walked away with. The black-haired boy stopped in front of him and his lips flattened down into a straight line, bringing in feelings of unease into Jisung. He could feel his friends stare at him and the boy in front of him in a puzzled way. 

"Hey, I'm sorry about what happened earlier," The boy started, staring at Jisung with a warmer look now, "It was so shocking to see him behave that way, he usually doesn't act like that, believe me, he is a really genuine person even to people he doesn't know, but that is no excuse for his sudden behavior and I couldn't help but feel second hand guilt, so I'm very sorry."

"There is no need to be sorry!" Jisung smiled warmly at the black-haired male, "It's not even your fault, but I guess apology accepted?" 

The boy responded with a giggle and Jisung's smile widened. That boy's giggle sounded so innocent and lively. His facial features looked so breathtakingly cute, it was as if he was an angel that had fallen from the sky. The way he smiled at him made his innocent-cute features stand out even more if that was even possible.

"I'm Jeongin by the way, a first-year student," the boy reached out his hand towards Jisungs, and Jisung accepted it, shaking it.

"I'm Jisung, first-year student too, and," The blonde turned to his still baffled friends and chuckled, he had some explaining to do, "This is Seungmin, Felix, and Hyunjin, they are also first-year students like us." The three of them looked up at Jeongin and gave him a friendly smile, to which he waved at them, the smile still hanging on his lips. 

"May I get your numbers? It would be nice to make new friends here." They all happily nodded and exchanged numbers with Jeongin before he bid his goodbye, saying that his friend was waiting for him to tour him around the University for a bit. 

Once the boy left, Jisung watched in amusement when Seungmin wiggled his eyebrows at Hyunjin who was flushing furiously.

"What?" The black-haired male scoffed.

"I saw that~" Seungmin smirked.

"Saw what?"

"You were ogling over Jeongin, I saw how your eyes twinkled while he was smiling." 

"His smile is so beautiful! He is beautiful and so sweet, I never have seen someone so sweet like Jeongin ever in my nineteen years of being alive," Hyunjin dreamily smiled, making them all let out a laugh.

"Hyunjinnie is in love," Jisung cooed and Hyunjin immediately covered his face with his hands, and Jisung shook his head and sighed as he patted the older male's back, trying to calm the flustered male down. It was funny how Hyunjin wasn't denying his love for the cute looking male.

"What was Jeongin talking about? Who was being like that towards you?" Hyunjin removed his hand from his face and turned to look at Jisung, changing the subject.

"Uh, well when I was walking, this one guy crashed into me and we both fell down and he got mad, it's no big deal," Jisung shrugged and Hyunjin squinted his eyes at him suspiciously before standing up to throw away his now empty carton of strawberry milk. 

"That guy seems to be quite an airhead," Seungmin claimed.

"Like you?" Hyunjin smirked as he returned to his spot.

"Shut up."

\--------

The morning math class wasn't too bad as he expected. He had that class with his best friend Hyunjin, and they both spent the entire lecture hour talking quietly to each other as the math professor taught some weird algebraic equations that Jisung couldn't quite understand. He didn't completely suck at math, nor was he good at math. Jisung could understand some things and other things he just couldn't. Of course, talking to Hyunjin and not focusing on the lecture wasn't something he should be doing, but he couldn't help it, that class was so fucking boring. Jisung didn't exactly need to pay attention in that class, because the professor stated that he posted the notes online so that the students could use those as reference for help with studying and homework. 

Currently, it was health class, this class wasn't quite bad either. It helps that the professor speaks enthusiastically, keeping Jisung awake and alert. He actually enjoyed this class, even though the subject was merely teaching things that are based on common sense, and he learned most of these things in High school. Jisung was just glad it was easy.

"Therefore, practicing safe sex is important," Professor Wang said in an exaggerated way, and then he looked down at his shiny silver watch before looking back up at the students with a smile displayed on his lips, "You have a minute left, you can pack up now." He said before walking over to his desk and cleaned up the messes of papers, files, and pens that were scattered around.

Jisung placed his notebook into his black backpack and zipped it up, and once the time displayed on his phone showed that it was twelve, he ambled his way out of the health lecture room, happy that it was lunch break. His stomach was growling since he hadn't eaten breakfast and he really wanted to order a nice filling lunch. 

He turned to the left, and headed down the stairwell, reaching the first floor. On his right was the bathroom, across from the large modernly structured cafeteria. Jisung decided to use the bathroom first before getting lunch. He could see how crowded the line was with students waiting to order, and he didn't feel like waiting there, being around large crowds of people make him really anxious, he could already feel the nerves run around inside his stomach. 

When Jisung stepped inside the bathroom, he was in awe with how clean it looked, the mirrors had led lights above them, and the walls were painted in light grey, and the bathroom stalls were black, the colors mix and matched pretty well. It was nice, but the smell in this place made him want to gag, it smelled like must and old piss mixed in with a vanilla scent. _Well, at least one thing smells nice._

He walked further in heading near the stalls. Jisung saw that one stall in the middle was occupied by someone, so he passed that one and the next empty one, before heading into the last one in this row and closed the stall door behind him lightly. 

Once he was done, he flushed the toilet and was about to leave the stall but weird noises stopped him in his tracks. The curiosity got the best of him, and he focused intensely on the sound. He could hear soft movements and some quick panting, and the first thing that crossed his mind was the fact that this person might be doing something really lewd. Why would someone do this in a bathroom? This person seemed like they were too desperate. 

Pushing away those thoughts, telling himself that it wasn't any of his business, he left the stall and approached the sink washing his hands with the vanilla-scented soap. Jisung really loved the smell of vanilla, it helped ease the negativity in his mind and brightened up his mood. He joyously sniffed in the pleasant vanilla scent that mixed in with the slight steam the came from the lukewarm water. 

"Oh, it's just _you_ ," He heard someone say, that voice sounded familiar. Jisung was so distracted that he didn't even hear the stall door opening and closing. He turned his head to the right and nearly jumped back in shock seeing who it was. It was no one other than that cocky looking brunette, and that was the same brunette who was doing whatever he was doing in that stall. His bangs were drenched in sweat, sticking against his forehead and he was still panting a little. He had on a duffle bag, was he an athlete?

"What are you staring at?" The boy sneered eyeing Jisung from head to toe as if he was some sort of piece of trash that didn't belong in this place. Jisung turned red and looked away reaching for the paper towel in the paper towel dispenser and dried off his hands. He heard the other let out a chuckle at this action of his. 

"I'm sure you heard what I was doing in the stall." The brunette smirked and Jisung refrained from rolling his eyes. "Whatever you heard, it's not going to change the fact that people would _love_ to be bent over by me." _Genuine?_ This brunette in front of him wasn't so nice as Jeongin claimed him to be. Jisung felt a little intimidated by him, that short-tempered male in from of him could possibly beat him to pulp by any second _._ It definitely looks like the Brunette has a problem with him since he crashed into him earlier this morning.

"Tch." The brunette scoffed and headed towards the door to Jisung's relief.

"I never saw someone _this_ bitchy in my life," Jisung quietly mumbled to himself, but then realization flashed before him and he was ready to dig himself a hole and crawl in there and await his death. He didn't hear the bathroom door opening and closing, the Brunette was still there and Jisung could feel the tension fume up in the air. He fucked up. 

"What did you just fucking say?" He was suddenly pushed against the stall wall, and let out a little squeak from the impact. All of his confidence and ego shattered apart, and he was left with fear. The glare the other was giving him was so scary, he felt as if he was shrinking. 

The brunette stepped closer to him, his face centimeters away, not moving his gaze from the blonde male's fear-stricken eyes. The brunette was an inch or two taller than him, and he looked really strong. "What did you call me?" He sneered, and Jisung lowered his head in shame, he just wanted to get out of here. The brunette gripped onto Jisung's chin and forced his head up making the blonde have no choice but to look up at him. 

"Answer me you dip shit!" _Enough was enough._

"You clearly heard what I said _, bitch,"_ Jisung muttered out but then clamped his mouth shut in deep regret. He could tell that he made the situation worse because the other male was horrendously angry now. 

"Oh, you asked for it!" And there was the strong fist that met with his stomach, making Jisung let out a yelp of pain and winced afterward feeling the wrenching pain hurt like hell. And there goes the hunger slivering into ashes, becoming non-existent now, despite not eating anything for almost the whole day. 

With shaky breathes he met with the Brunette haired male's eyes and surprisingly it showed guilt, and his mouth was shaped into a small 'o' but within a span of a second, his expression changed to a smug look as if he were satisfied with what he had just done. And the Brunette stepped back a few steps and eyed Jisung from head to toe.

"You're a fucking wuss." He laughed out loud. "Poor thing, you should go work out, it will help you a lot, _noodle legs_."

"I _do_ work out, and I _have_ muscles for your information," Jisung said defending himself from the humiliation and the other gave him an 'oh really?' look and raised a brow.

"Prove it then." _Prove it?_

"I'm not ly-" But before he could complete his statement the other walked to him, and pulled up his grey shirt, displaying his six-pack and Jisung noticed how impressed the other looked before he let go of his shirt.

"Even if you have muscles, it doesn't change the fact that you are a weak piece of shit, you better stay out of my way or I will make things way worse for you than it is now, got it?" The brunette threatened before spitting on Jisung's face and he turned around and walked out of the bathroom, leaving the blonde alone. 

Tears whelmed up in his eyes and he slid down onto the bathroom floor and pulled his legs up against his chest, letting the tears flow freely. This is not how he wanted his first day to be like. He was sure that the upcoming days were going to be hard since he has the brunette hanging on his head waiting to make his life miserable. 


	2. Café pain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jisung joined his friends at the lunch table late, because of the situation in the bathroom. He didn't tell them exactly what happened and kept quiet about it. After lunch, he met two friendly people in his advanced music production class and he was happy to get to befriend them, to his amazement they had the same passion as him. And he felt as if his first day wasn't quite bad after all, but at night, when he and Hyunjin went to the café, painful words crushed his ego entirely.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter :D, this was so fun to write haha, I hope you enjoy it~!

After calming down and washing his spit stained face, Jisung exited the bathroom and headed straight into the cafeteria. He was very late, lunch break was going to end in thirty minutes and he had been in the bathroom for thirty minutes dealing with the cold-hearted brunette that could make babies cry with once glance. Jisung believed he was once of those babies. Crying wasn't something he should be doing, Jisung wanted to be strong and not look like a "wuss," but his thin frame and his pretty looking face made him look like a weak, no matter how much muscle was underneath the clothes he was wearing. 

"What took you forever?" Seungmin asked once Jisung sat down beside Hyunjin at the table. Jisung didn't know how to explain, he didn't want to explain what happened. Worrying his friends was something he didn't intend on doing.

"You look constipated," Felix asserted, a long of concern painted his features, "Are you alright?"

"Yeah..." Jisung sighed, "Just tired." He rested his head down onto his arms and could feel the worried gazes they were giving him. Is the first day okay? No, it turned out to be pretty bad, but he couldn't avoid it, he knows he needs to endure the torture.

"Do we really need a sports bag for dance class?" Hyunjin grumbled switching into another topic to Jisung's relief. Lying to them especially Hyunjin was going to be hard. "I really don't want to carry that around, I'll suffer chronic shoulder pain."

"Well, it was recommended to have one, in case we want to bring comfortable practice clothes, towels, and stuff. We wouldn't need to carry it _every day_ though, just the days we have this dance class," Felix elaborated, "By the way did you see that one second-year student's skills in dance? He is like a dancing gem! Even the dance teacher praised that students skills so much! What was his name again?" 

"Lee Minho. Dude, I wish I could be good like him, he is so humble and kind. Oh, and did you see his thighs? They are so thick and muscular," Hyunjin cheerfully said and Jisung lifted his head from his arms and stared at the smiling black haired male.

"He must dance a lot and work out too," Felix murmured.

"Yeah just look at those thighs, and he looks so handsome~"

"How many students are you attracted to now?" Seungmin raised his eyebrow and let out a laugh, "First Jeongin and now this Minho guy."

"Of course I love Jeongin, he is such an adorable person~" Hyunjin replied gleefully while cupping his own face, making the three of them smile in response. Jisung hoped that Hyunjin's dream could come true and that he could date Jeongin, they seem like a perfect match. Hyunjin was caring and considerate, and Jeongin was sweet and sympathetic, they would fit so well for each other. 

\--------

Sadly the lunch break had come to an end, and Jisung had to part ways and head to his next class. He was sure this next class was going to be his favorite. It was not in the main University building though, it was in the performing arts building, the building Hyunjin's and Felix's dance class was located in. So he had to leave the main building and head past the engineering building to get to the performing arts building. 

Excitement flooded through his blood as he walked through the halls, he passed by several different dance practice rooms and turned to the left where the music production rooms where. He had to find production room 208. 

"There it is," Jisung mumbled to himself and pushed open the door stepping inside the music production room. He was met with the professor's eyes on him and he felt the students gazes also direction right at him. Nervousness began occupying his mind, Jisung wished they could just look away. Was he late? Is that why they were staring at him like that?

"You must be Han Jisung, the only first-year student who got accepted into this class!" The professor greeted, and Jisung said a 'hello' and bowed in response, "I'm professor Tuan. Welcome to this advanced music production class. I'm very delighted to have you here. Since this is an advanced class, this class will focus on individual and group projects, so go ahead and find a group." 

Jisung turned to the class and felt a lump form on his throat. They were all looking right at him. He scanned around trying to find a friendly group, but most of the students were just blankly staring back at him, so he couldn't tell who was friendly or not. Jisung's eyes landed on a student smiling at him, his hair was blonde and curly, and next to him was another student who looked emotionless. _They're friendly I hope._ Taking a deep breath in, he walked towards them, and sat down at an empty monitor next to the blonde, who turned at him a whispered a 'hello' making Jisung feel less afraid and more welcome. 

"Since today is the first day of class, you may now get to know your groupmates," The professor directed before he walked over to his large smooth black desk that had two medium-sized speakers and a large monitor between them and began working. 

From his spot, Jisung looked around this class and was in awe with how clean this large studio was. The flooring was of dark grey smooth marble and the walls were painted black, this production room looked so high tech. 

"So Han Jisung, welcome to our group~" The blonde spoke, popping Jisung from his happy trance and he looked over at him. "My name is Chan, and this is Changbin." The emotionless boy waved at him and gave him a tiny smile, he seemed shy. 

"We had a group name, it was called 2racha, but we changed it."

"Why what was wrong with it?" Jisung asked the name sounded really cool to him. Chan and Changbin both looked at each other and then back at Jisung and snickered. Jisung looked down at his jeans in embarrassment for asking what he thought was a ridiculous question.

"No silly, it's 3racha now," Changbin chuckled, "Because you are now in our group, welcome."

"Thank you," Jisung meekly replied and looked up at the two of them.

"This class is full of second and third-year students, you're the only first year here, but don't worry about it too much, we are nice and we are both only second-year students," Chan assured him. 

"Yeah, we don't bite, we just spit fire cause we are hot sauces," Changbin smirked and Chan sighed and shook his head at the other, making Jisung laugh a little. So that explained the meaning of their group name. 

"It would be so great if we could hear what an advanced music producer like you produced," Chan said with a wide smile, showing his dimples. Jisung would've shown them his best work, but he forgot to bring his laptop that contained all his music files. He thought he wouldn't be needing it that much, but it looks like it would've been great if he brought it today.

"I can show you next time when I bring my laptop," Jisung smiled, and they both happily nodded in response.

\--------

The class had come to an end to Jisung's dismay, he was in love with this class and already became great friends with Chan and Changbin, they even exchanged numbers with him and created a new group chat with him called '3racha.' They both told him that not only did they create hip hop beats, but also rapped and sung to their own music and posted it on sound cloud. What made them so surprised was how Jisung himself could sing and rap and they were beyond elated and asked him if he wanted to rap and sing with them too and of course, he said yes. He couldn't let his talent go to waste. 

He thought to himself in joy as he headed inside his dormitory building east of the University. Jisung used the elevator to head to his dorm room on the second floor and once he reached his shared dorm room door, he excitedly pressed in the code and unlocked the door exhilarated to tell Hyunjin about how fun his music production class was and how he made two second-year student friends. 

When he closed the door behind him and turned to Hyunjin, he noticed how Hyunjin was smiling at his phone widely as he typed away. Upon noticing his presence, Hyunjin turned off his phone and placed it onto his pillow before turning to face Jisung.

"You look happy," Hyunjin started.

"And so do you," Jisung laughed.

"Do you want to start off first?" 

"Okay," Jisung smiled impossibly wider, "My music production class was so fun! I made two second-year student friends who are so freaking nice! We call ourselves '3racha' and not only do they create music, but they also sing and rap like me! Can my first day get any better?" What he thought was a horrible first day turned out to have a great outcome. 

"See I told you it was all going to be okay," Hyunjin beamed, "Well, I had a history class with Jeongin after lunch, and we've become friends, although I wish for more. I was texting him earlier, and he is even sweet while he texts." He blushed. 

"I hope you two can date soon~" 

"I hope so too," Hyunjin chirped. 

Jisung sauntered towards his bed and plopped down onto the comfortable mattress, facing Hyunjin's way who was just watching him with a smile still displayed on his lips. He loved seeing him happy, a happy Hyunjin is such an adorable Hyunjin. 

There was a moment of silence, they didn't know what else to talk about. And Jisung thought to himself about whether or not to tell Hyunjin about why he presumably came later to lunch. He wanted to let it out of his chest, but not worry the other too much. Maybe he could be indirect about it? He and Hyunjin had always talked about being open to each other, but Jisung was unsure if he should even utter a word about the bathroom incident. Indirect he will be. Anything to not bring the other into worry.

"Hyunjin Hyung?" Jisung muttered out.

"Hm?"

"I was wondering, what should I do in a situation where there is someone being kind of cold to me and threatens me?" _Does that sound indirect enough?_ He didn't think so because Hyunjin looked really worried right now, and Jisung did _not_ want him to be worried.

"Who is doing this to you?!" Hyunjin demanded, furrowing his eyebrows in slight anger. "Who is threatening my Jisungie like that?" Now Jisung isn't able to beat around the bush to avoid answering properly. He was good at lying, kind of, but Hyunjin was the master at reading people's expressions determining how exactly they feel and could catch lies within a snap. Lying and not being open is what makes Hyunjin disappointed. To Hyunjin, being lied to was like getting a punch in the face and Jisung preferred not lying to his own best friend a lot, because it made him guilty as fuck.

"J-Just someone," Jisung stammered. _Well, that answered his question well_. 

"I asked _who_ ," Hyunjin stormed sternly, "Is it someone from our University?" Jisung nodded in response.

"Do you know their name?" Jisung shook his head, he didn't know the brunette's name, and didn't want to. 

"Look," Hyunjin sighed, "If there is someone being this cold to you, I think you should ignore them or show that your not a person that people should bother with, and then the person might back away. Otherwise, seriously if that person persistently does it to you, tell me, I have two strong fists and height. I would never want _anyone_ to hurt you. Got it?" Hyunjin strong? Indeed. Biceps? Yeah, just like Jisung, Hyunjin had biceps, he worked out a lot.

"Y-Yeah," Jisung gulped. He could tell Hyunjin was being serious about this. The other male got off from his bed and walked over to Jisung's bedside, sitting down beside him. He wrapped one arm around Jisung, pulling him into a side hug. 

"I don't like it when you are hurt, so never keep things to yourself okay?" Hyunjin murmured near Jisung's ear and the blonde responded with a nod a few seconds later. 

"Tonight, let's go to the café I told you about this morning," Hyunjin continued to speak, "Maybe it will make you feel better?" Jisung looked up at the black-haired male and gave him a smile and nodded, and Hyunjin smiled back. A café is somewhere Jisung really wanted to go to, he loved buying café drinks with pastries to eat.

\--------

It was already night, and the two males dug into their closet to find something not only nice to wear but comfortable. Jisung grabbed black Nike joggers along with a black t-shirt and begun changing. They didn't really mind changing in front of each other, they were very comfortable enough with each other to the point they often changed in the same room. Sometimes while they changed they compared each other's muscles or even nagged each other to eat more since they both were quite thin. 

Jisung put on the joggers and then began taking off his grey shirt, and when he tossed it by the closet door, he heard a gasp escape from Hyunjin's mouth. Confused, Jisung looked over at the other male who was already dressed. Hyunjin's eyes were wide, and his mouth was slightly opened, his gaze was down at Jisung's stomach. _Oh_. Now he had another excuse to make.

"What happened?!" Hyunjin screeched and inched closer to the blonde trying to get a better view of the injury on his stomach. Jisung didn't know what to say in response. How could he come up with a convincing excuse to someone who was good at catching lies? Especially _his_ lies? They both been friends for years, and they are both very close almost like siblings, so there is nothing they didn't know about each other. They both could see through each other like glass.

"Tell me who did this to you?!"

"I...uh..." _Think Jisung think_. "I hit a corner really badly and it left a bruise."

"A bruise _that_ big?" Hyunjin crossed his arms over his chest and raised a brow, "That does not look like a bruise caused by hitting a corner, it literally looks like someone hit you." Jisung lowered his gaze down at the floor as if it was the most interesting thing in this room. He heard the other sigh and stepped closer to him. Hyunjin placed a finger under Jisung's chin and lifted his head, making Jisung look him in the eye.

"Don't lie to me, _Han Jisung_ ," Hyunjin condemned, but this time he didn't sound too fumed any more, "Did the student that you said threatened you and was being cold to you did this to you?" Jisung had no choice but to admit the truth, he couldn't beat around the bush anymore so he responded with a nod.

"It was my fault though, I angered him," Jisung pointed out and the other just let out a scoff.

"But that doesn't mean that the person had to go as far as hitting you right in the stomach!" 

"Oh," Jisung uttered out.

"Next time, if that fucker does it to you tell me and I'm ready to make that person regret it," Hyunjin growled.

"Okay..."

"Let's go to the café, we wouldn't want to be too late," Hyunjin's expression finally softened and he had on a small smile. Jisung quickly grabbed his black shirt and put it on, and then reached for his hoodie that was on his desk chair and tugged it on, pulling the large hood over his head. They both stepped out of their dorm and walked side by side towards the elevator and headed down to the first floor before they exited the dormitory building. 

Once they stepped out, Jisung was met with the chilly night air brushing onto his face, he was glad he wore this hoodie otherwise he would've been a bit cold. 

"The café is actually down the block and onto the left, it shouldn't take too long to get there," Hyunjin spoke and they two of them began heading to the said direction. 

They both reached the café, the building was so beautiful and well kept and Jisung already started liking this place. When they both stepped inside, Jisung smiled at the warmness reaching his face, warming the tip of his cold nose. The café looked so neat, the walls were beige colored and the flooring was of black marble, the ceiling lights twinkled on it. This place smelled like fresh coffee, of course, and it gave Jisung a soothing effect.

They both walked towards the front counter, and as they walked Jisung looked around a little before his eyes caught on someone with brunette colored hair just like the cold-hearted person in his university. The person was seated at one of the tables by the wall on the right and his back was turned so Jisung couldn't get a clear view of who he really was. _Chill, it can't be him, so many people have brown hair, he isn't the only one, dumb ass._

But still, he was still getting that weird feeling that it was that same person. Anxiousness started building up inside him and subconsciously he gripped onto Hyunjin's hand alerting the other. 

"Are you okay?" Hyunjin asked looking down at the blonde in worry. Jisung responded with a forced smile and quick nod. "So, what would you like to order?" 

"Just an espresso."

"One iced tea and one espresso please," Hyunjin said to the person behind the register, who entered in their orders onto the touch screen monitor. When the worker announced their total, Jisung quickly removed his hand from Hyunjin and pulled out his credit card, and paid for their drinks, upsetting Hyunjin. 

"We will bring your drinks in shortly."

"Thank you," Hyunjin smiled, and Jisung once again held onto Hyunjin's hand before they walked over to the tables and decided to sit down on the one by the wall on the left. Jisung sat down first and scooted in, letting Hyunjin sit down next to him. They still hadn't remove their hands from each other. Jisung peered over at the spot the person he saw earlier was sitting at and felt his heart stop, it _is_ him. And thankfully the brunette was too busy on his phone to even notice him. 

"Jisung, are you sure you are okay? You look really anxious." Jisung's attention snapped onto Hyunjin who was looking at him with concern evident in his eyes.

"Y-Yeah totally!" Jisung forced a smile again, to which Hyunjin looked at him with doubt. "Just really happy to be here, yeah~"

"Your response sounds forced," Hyunjin flatly replied, "What's on your mind?"

"Um, just nervous for tomorrow's classes, I wonder if I will even survive," Jisung shrugged and Hyunjin's mouth shaped into an 'o.' 

"If you survived today, I'm sure you will survive tomorrow," Hyunjin chuckled, and Jisung mentally patted himself on the back for making an inconvincible person, convinced. However, Jisung couldn't help but feel a bit guilty for not saying what exactly was on his mind. The brunette over there was making him feel uneasy, what if he notices him? Will he confront him and threaten him again? But would he even do it in front of Hyunjin? The was only one solution to these concerns, Jisung had to go unnoticed. 

"Your thoughts are pretty loud," Hyunjin commented casually, and Jisung let go of Hyunjin's hand and scratched his hair nervously, why did Hyunjin gave to be this good at reading him?

"I'm thinking about the espresso~" Jisung awkwardly laughed and as if on cue their drinks arrived, and Hyunjin handed Jisung his espresso. He took a single sip and his insides instantly felt warm and he smiled a little. 

"I love this place even more already," Hyunjin giggled as he drank his iced tea. 

"Same," Jisung smiled and in the corner of his eyes he could see that the brunette was still on his phone. _Yes, keep looking at your phone_.

"Oh! is that Minho?!" Hyunjin suddenly questioned a little too loudly, and Jisung was confused. _Minho?_ He heard that name before, and then it clicked, Minho is that one student they were speaking so highly of during lunch. Following Hyunjins gaze, Jisung looked over to where Hyunjin was looking and Jisung widened his eyes seeing the brunette walking over to their table with a smile on his face. _That's Minho!_ Jisung quickly pulled out his phone and pulled his hood forward even more, trying to hide half of his face. He pressed on a random app, and it turned out to be Youtube, so pretended to be occupied with a video. 

"Hey, I heard you say my name," Minho spoke in a friendly voice, "It's nice to see you here Hyunjin."

"Nice to see you here too," Hyunjin replied back in a cheerful way. Now Jisung will never tell Hyunjin the truth about Minho being cold to him, the two of them seemed to get along well, and Jisung didn't want to ruin their bond.

"Who is that yellow head?" _Yellow head?_ Jisung rolled his eyes in annoyance. It seemed like the two of them were waiting for him to introduce himself, but he paid no mind to it, pretending that he was focused on his phone, when in reality he was actually listening to them.

"He is Han Jisung, he is kind of shy," Hyunjin replied back trying to cover up for Jisung's sudden weird behavior. Jisung wasn't too shy, he was just socially awkward in some circumstances. But he wasn't too awkward to the point that he didn't introduce himself to the others, Jisung always happily introduced himself to people, hoping to make friends. But Minho was someone he didn't want to get to know, the other hated him from head to toe. 

"Oh, _Han Jisung_ , it's nice to meet him then, I guess?" Minho said in an unsure way. But the tone of his voice sounded knowing, it was as if Minho could tell who he was. "You wouldn't mind if I sit here?" Oh great. Jisung didn't want Minho to recognize him, but there was a high chance he would, _if_ Minho looked this way. Minho sat down across from Hyunjin, and for a second Jisung could feel Minho's gaze on him, but he shook it off and remained staring at his phone, at a video that wasn't even interesting for him. It was just a video of someone trying to do a backflip several times but failing each time. 

"How do you like the dance class?" Minho asked Hyunjin.

"It's so fun! How are you so good at dancing?" Hyunjin beamed.

"I'm not _that_ good at dancing, there are still improvements I need to focus on," Minho laughed. Hyunjin was right during lunch, Minho is pretty humble. If he didn't crash into Minho yesterday, and if they didn't fight in the bathroom, Jisung would've also believed that Minho is such a nice and kind person that he could get along with. "I saw you dance too, you and your friend Felix are doing great!" Minho complimented. _Maybe Minho just isn't very fond of me? Maybe I'm the only person he prefers not being kind to?_

 _"_ Thank you, although we might have improvements we need to work on too."

And they just continued talking about their dance class and just dancing in general, and Jisung stopped listening to their conversation, not interested anymore and scrolled through his Youtube feed trying to find something interesting to watch. He knows he is being rude, he didn't introduce himself to Minho, and he was basically ignoring their presence, but he really didn't want to associate with Minho. His goal was to just avoid him so that he doesn't stir up any more problems. Jisung wishes he was in good terms with Minho, but it seemed impossible. Minho seemed to hate him so much.

"Um, I'll go the bathroom real quick," Hyunjin spoke and this is what grabbed Jisung's attention and in an instant, he held onto Hyunjin's wrist preventing him from standing, and Hyunjin looked at him confused. Jisung tried to give him a pleading puppy look, but the other just let out a light chuckle. "I'll be back, this iced tea is already making me want to use the bathroom." Jisung nodded in defeat and let Hyunjin stand up to leave the bathroom.

Once Hyunjin left, he could tell Minho was looking at him right now. Jisung continued trying to keep his face hidden so that the other wouldn't recognize him.

" _So_ , Jisung is your name huh?" Minho sneered, "Even if you have that hood on, I can still recognize you from your blonde hair and skinny body. I saw you and Hyunjin both walk to this table." Jisung turned off his phone and looked right at Minho who had an emotionless look on his face. His plan of not being recognized failed. Jisung is screwed. 

"Are you and Hyunjin dating?" He asked monotonously, "You both were holding hands while walking to this table. So clingy." 

"We are not dating, we are best friends," Jisung corrected the other who leaned back against his seat and smirked.

" _Oh really_?" Minho quipped. _Hyunjin what's taking you so long? It's not like you drank several cups of iced tea!_ Jisung wondered how long he was going to suffer here. "Well, a weak shy person like you probably lack skills to even obtain a boyfriend." Now that hurt Jisung right in the heart. 

"I'm surprised you even have friends," Minho dryly commented, "You seem quite burdensome." 

Those words were like sharp swords stabbing him right in the chest, and Jisung bit his bottom lip trying to prevent himself from crying. He didn't want to look anymore vulnerable. Jisung's tears managed to escape anyway as he was in so much pain. He quickly picked his phone and stuffed it into his hoodie pocket, wiped away his running tears and stood up.

"Ji-"

And he left, not giving Minho a single glance.

Jisung pressed in the code to his dorm room, and opened the door. He stepped inside, closed the door behind him and tossed himself onto his bed, laying on his back. _Am I burdensome?_ He wiped away his tears again with his hoodie paw and sniffled. Jisung thought about many things that made him burdensome as Minho claimed. Was he too shy? Was it his ego? It could be his ego, Seungmin seemed to dislike it. Does he?

A couple of minutes had passed by quickly since Jisung was locked in his negative thoughts and the code being entered in popped him out of those thoughts. Hyunjin is now back from the café. Jisung turned to his side, and pulled his comforter over up to his chin and shut his eyes pretending to be asleep. He didn't want to be asked why he left the café.

"Oh, that's why you left early," He heard Hyunjin say and close the door, "You must've been really sleepy after such a long day." He turned off the lights and stepped over to his bed, and laid on there, Jisung could hear the soft creek come from Hyunjin's bed. 

"Well, goodnight Jisungie-ah." 


	3. Masked feelings

"Wake up, it's eight," He heard Hyunjin say, and Jisung furrowed his eyebrows wanting to sleep in more. He didn't feel like going to class, when he saw his schedule for today's classes yesterday, he already had felt the boredom arise. 

"Come on, just wake up," Hyunjin sighed, "We have to get to school." Still, he didn't move a single inch, if he does move Hyunjin will think he is awake and pester him more, and getting out of bed was the last thing he wanted to do. Jisung didn't feel like going to uni, afraid that he will encounter the cold-hearted dancer. Jisung had an anguished feeling run inside him, a feeling that Minho would probably join their table. If he did, it wouldn't even be surprising. Hyunjin was friends with Jeongin, Jeongin is friends with Minho, and both Felix and Hyunjin have a dance class with Minho, so they probably are comfortable with each other already.

"Jisung, Jisung, Jisung," Hyunjin placed his hand on Jisung's back and shook him vigorously, trying to get him up, he wasn't going to give up. _Stop_. _Let me sleep_. "Jisungie, Jisungie, Jisungie, Jiji, wake up!" _No!_

 _You seem quite burdensome._ Jisung jolted up, surprising Hyunjin and pulled down his comforter before swinging his legs out of his bed and walking over to his closet to get dressed. 

"I almost thought you were dead," Hyunjin laughed. Jisung just yawned and put on a red-colored t-shirt, and light blue jeans before grabbing his backpack and putting it on. "Well, that was fast." The two of them exited their shared dorm and began proceeding their way out of the dormitory building, heading to their university. It wasn't too far away from their dorms, just a ten-minute walk. But this time the ten-minute walk was full of silence, Hyunjin and Jisung didn't speak to each other, and Jisung could tell Hyunjin felt a little awkward. Usually, Jisung was the one who babbled a lot, but he was quiet at the moment.

"How are you doing?" Jisung suddenly asked, trying to be a good friend and checking up on Hyunjin's mood. Hyunjin looked at Jisung before letting out a chortle.

"Funny you'd ask, since we barely even started our day," Hyunjin joked, and averted his gaze back forward at the University building, they were getting closer to it. "But I'd say so far it's good, also I'm not really happy about today's classes."

"Neither am I," Jisung sighed. His first-class was art and he couldn't even draw a flower well. Hopefully, the class was easy and he hoped he didn't have to paint advanced portraits and stuff. His lack of skills in art was very noticeable. 

\--------

And his feelings were right. Once they bought their breakfast and neared their usual table, Jisung saw how there was Minho seated right across from Felix, and Jeongin sat next to Minho, and he was across Seungmin. Hyunjin rapidly took the seat next to Jeongin, leaving Jisung to stand there staring at the table. He looked at Minho who was talking to Felix with a smile and when the brunette felt his gaze, he looked over at Jisung giving him a blank look. Felix, following Minho's stare, turned around and raised his brow at Jisung.

"What are you doing standing there like that? Come sit down," Felix giggled at Jisung's odd antic, and with a deep inhale, Jisung stepped closer to the table and sat down at the empty spot next to Seungmin. 

In silence, Jisung poked at his waffle and dragged it back and forth around his plate, not really interested in eating it. And Hyunjin being the alert friend he is was eyed Jisung with worry.

"Jisung, is everything okay? You seem quieter," Hyunjin asked. 

"Of course I am, it's morning and I'm just drowsy," Jisung responded back, lying through his teeth. Oddly enough, he felt completely awake, he wasn't drowsy he was just anxious. 

"Ah, sorry if I woke you up like that," Hyunjin laughed actually believing Jisung's lie. "But I have to wake your lazy-ass up." 

"Sometimes I just want to stay in bed too," Jeongin chimed in, and Jisung looked over at the smiling male. "I wish I could just sleep all day, but don't want to miss any classes." Jisung nodded in agreement, before returning back to picking at his waffle. _Why did I even buy it if I'm not going to eat it?_ Not wanting to be a money waster, Jisung picked up his glass of juice and downed it all in one go before placing it back onto the table. 

Jisung was usually the one who did a lot of the talking, but today was different, the new-founded friends were talking to each other in pure joy. Talking about things that Jisung didn't find interesting and he left himself out of their conversation, and just quietly listened. Seungmin, Hyunjin, and Jeongin were talking about video games, and Hyunjin claimed that he was the best at them, and Seungmin countered saying that he was better. When Jeongin spoke, Hyunjin looked at him in a starstruck way and was smiling fondly at the younger. Minho and Felix were talking about dance, of course, they both favored hip hop a lot. 

The blonde pulled out his phone, and checked time displayed on top of his lock screen wallpaper of himself smiling and doing the peace sign with his fingers, and it was eight forty-seven, thirteen minutes left until it was time to head to his art class. Deciding to leave early, he stood up and left, not looking back to see whether they noticed or not, he just wanted to leave.

\--------

The art class wasn't too bad as Jisung expected, but not too good either. The art professor gave them an easy assignment to do in class and turn it in next time, but Jisung didn't consider that assignment easy. The assignment was to draw a favorite person, and of course, Jisung drew Hyunjin. He felt confident that his drawing was good because he put in a whole bunch of effort, but when he looked back at it his drawing, his confidence dribbled down within a second. His drawing was so horrid that even Hyunjin would cringe at this so-called hard work done on a piece of drawing paper. The head was shaped like a giant balloon, and Jisung patted himself in the back for that, at least he could draw a balloon. The eyes were very distorted, he made one eye too big, and the other one too high up. Jisung drew Hyunjin's lips too crooked and the only thing that turned out nice amongst this entire sketch was the eyebrows. Jisung was never going to show Hyunjin this drawing of him, only if he wants to seek revenge. 

Currently, Jisung was in his biology class, and it was almost coming to an end. Jisung mindlessly jotted down things onto his favorite notebook, he was writing down lyrics, one of his favorite things to do even though he should be focused on taking biology notes. Not that he cared, this lesson was a little too easy.

"This is a mitochondrion, it produces energy and normalizes cellular respiration," The professor spoke monotonously and used his pointing stick to point at the green blob looking thing projected onto the giant overhead screen against the wall. Jisung could probably draw that blob at least. 

A few more minutes passed, the time was going against Jisung favors, it was ticking by so slowly to his dismay and there were only two minutes left to go. He tapped his pencil against his notebook growing impatient due to the dragging minute. Jisung just wanted to get out of this hell of a class and meet his friends at lunch. 

"This is an anima-oh looks like it is time to go," The professor concluded, "I will post your homework assignment online and since this is your first day of class I will assign you only three chapters to do, that will be due the next time I see you." _Only_ three chapters? Jisung scoffed to himself as he shoved his notebook and into his backpack, and threw in his pencil in there carelessly before trotting out of this class. 

Jisung rushed through the halls, exiting the science department before passing the library and heading into the nearby main section. He headed inside the cafeteria meeting with the sound of students chattering calmly with each other. Jisung searched around students' heads trying to find the table his friends were seated at and spotted them in one of the tables located in the back. And of course, Minho and Jeongin were there too. 

With a sigh of dejection, Jisung walked over to the table and sat down at the first empty spot he could find. In front of him was Felix and next to him was Hyunjin, and Jisung tensed up seeing that Minho was seated across from Hyunjin. _He is diagonal from me, should I move?_ Jisung wanted to just go and sit next to Seungmin or Jeongin, but he felt trapped in his seat. He bit his lip and looked down at the lunch table, he just couldn't move they will wonder why.

"Jisung are y-"

"Yeah," Jisung cut Felix off before the other could continue his sentence. "I'm perfectly fine."

"Yeah right, look at you, you look really tense," Hyunjin retorted, and Jisung turned his head locking gazes with the worried Hyunjin.

"I am _not_ tense," Jisung countered, "Just tired, really."

"Okay if you say so," Hyunjin shrugged before turning his head to Minho, and Jisung lowered his head a bit feeling very awkward. "Minho Hyung, how long have you been dancing?"

"Um, I'd say ever since I was a kid, I always loved dance," Minho responded in a gleeful way, he was like a completely different person around the others but so cold and crude around Jisung. If it wasn't too much to ask for, Jisung wished he could just start over with the brunette, he wished Minho could forget about their first embarrassing clumsy encounter and their quarreling in the bathroom. Maybe Minho is a very genuine person, just not very nice people like Jisung himself. 

"I can see that, you are so talented with it," Felix smiled at the brunette who was slightly flustered by the compliment.

"I'm not _that_ good, really." Again, Minho is humble about his talents. The question Jisung asked himself is what actually made Minho hate him so much? Their encounters weren't fazing, maybe there is something about Jisung that probably made Minho dislike him. Sulking, Jisung stood up and was going to get ready to leave the table to head to the bathroom, but he was stopped in his movement when he noticed them all look at him in a puzzled way.

"Jisung Hyung where are you going?" Seungmin aksed.

"Somewhere," Jisung responded not wanting to disclose where he intended on heading to, he wanted to be alone to collect his thoughts. 

"You look really down," Hyunjin gently intoned, "Are you okay?"

"I'm just tired, I said that earlier," Jisung responded defensively trying to get their questions off his shoulders so he could leave already. 

"Stop with the excuses, _Han Jisung_ , you being quick to defend yourself irritatedly like this proves that there is something going on in your mind," Hyunjin jeered. At this point, all of their eyes were burning on him expectantly, and in the corner of his eyes, he could see Minho staring right at him blankly. "Jisung, you can tell me anything you know, it worries me to see you like this." There is nothing that Jisung felt besides feeling that he was a burden, Minho was indeed very right. Hyunjin always worried about him, even when Jisung is only a little bit sad. Was he too moody for Hyunjin's liking? 

"Maybe I should just leave, I'm just a burden after all," He looked back at the black-haired male. Jisung's rage cooled down a little but was replaced with sadness. He gave one glance to Minho who looked pained for some reason before Jisung stood up. Within an instant, he felt a hand on his wrist and Jisung looked down at Hyunjin who looked up at him, his eyebrows were furrowed, and gaze dead cold, cold enough to freeze others with his own eyes.

"Sit down," Hyunjin demanded, Jisung shook his head. "I said _sit down_." 

"I want to be alone right now, really." When Hyunjin wasn't letting go of his wrist, Jisung forcefully pulled away before walking away. He sped out of the cafeteria and turned to the direction where the bathroom was and stepped inside. It was silent and somehow student-less, this is exactly what Jisung needed, some silence to sort out his thoughts. He walked over to the bathroom sink and looked at himself in the mirror, absorbing in all his features. 

"Why does he hate me?" Jisung muttered as he squinted his eyes trying to find a flaw about himself, "Maybe I'm ugly?" No that couldn't be it, if Minho was a humble and kind person why would he even hate someone based on their looks? Jisung crossed that assumption, Minho doesn't seem like a person who judged by looks, and Jisung didn't even think he was ugly, he knows he is pretty good-looking. _You seem burdensome_. It clicked now. Remembering what Minho told him at the café, Jisung frowned at himself. Minho probably doesn't like him because of his inner personality. Jisung felt that he was too self-absorbed and quick-tempered.

 _Why can't I be better?_ Jisung watched himself in the mirror, he saw how tears began to brim onto his eyes making them appear glossy. The light above the bathroom mirror glistened onto the gathering water in his eyes, threatening to stream, and he set them free, knowing that he was alone and could cry out his soul without having passersbys look at him with concern. He pressed his hands on either side of the sink, feeling the cold marble counter right beneath the touch and he looked down at the drain. The tears dripped into the sink and he felt the muscle under his chin tremble and he let out a sob. "Why must I be like this?"

"Why the crying?" He heard a familiar honey-voice that belonged to no one other than Minho. Despite not talking to each other often, Jisung could recognize the other's unique voice. The blonde lifted his head and looked right at the mirror seeing Minho behind him with his arms crossed over his chest. Jisung wiped away his tears with the back of his hands and turned around to look at the brunette.

"Allergies," Jisung lied a stupid lie. But it is allergy season.

"So your allergies make you have super watery eyes and it makes you let out sobs? Your allergies make you look like you're crying but you're not crying because it's just allergies that make your eyes flood with so many tears that it makes you looked pained, but it's the allergies that are actually paining you like that?" Minho asked and those words seemed incoherent to Jisung, it didn't make any sense it was almost like a tongue twister but it instead twisted Jisung's mind into confusion. Minho seemed to sense Jisung's baffled state before he let out a snicker.

"Let me rephrase that, I'll just be blunt," Minho says, "Of course watery eyes are a symptom of allergies, but you looked perfectly fine up until lunch, fine as in not sick, but not fine when it comes to your feelings. The crying you were doing just seconds ago does not look like crying from allergies. So let me ask you this question that had already been asked, are you okay?"

"Yeah I'm okay, why do you even care?" Jisung raised his eyebrow.

"I don't care actually, it's just that your obvious lie made me want to laugh and I needed to educate you on the difference between crying from allergies and crying from sadness," Minho gibed, "I was here long enough to see you sob like that. I came here to wash my hands actually, but seeing you like that proves that you mask your feelings around others and be true to yourself when you partially alone."

"I'm fine," Jisung seethed, "I'll go now." He left the restroom and mentally cursed at himself. He needed to be more aware of his surroundings, Minho saw him cry and now he'll really think Jisung is such a softie and a wimp.

\--------

Jisung was sitting down against the wall beside his literature class door. There was still some time left before the lunch break ended and he sulkily stared at the other door ahead of him lost in thoughts. He shouldn't have stormed off on Hyunjin like that, he must have hurt his feelings. Jisung _is_ burdensome, and he knows nothing could change that. How was he going to be able to go back to his shared dorm with Hyunjin without feeling dread? 

"Well, what a surprise," Minho's voice sounded above him and Jisung looked up only to have chills run throughout his body, is he going to harass him for crying now? Or call him a coward? Minho looked at the door Jisung was sitting next to before peering down again. "You have this class too?" _Too?_ Does that mean he is in this class as well? His plan of avoiding Minho was a complete fail at this point. It's been a failure, they encountered each other often. 

"Y-Yeah, I do."

"That sucks, I have to see your horrendous ass more often now," Minho scowled. Now that hurt pretty bad.

"I thought you were a second-year student?" Jisung managed to ask, only to have the other snort.

"This literature class is for both first and second-year students dumb ass," Minho pointed out in a rather snide way. Minho in his literature class? Jisung didn't think his days could get any more horrible than this, a class with someone who hates his soul is going to be hard to get pass by. 

"Oh, and did you really buy my words like that in the café?"

"What words?" Jisung meekly responded raising his eyebrows. 

"When I said that you seemed burdensome," Minho crossed his arms over his chest, "I can't believe you took it to heart like that. How exactly am I supposed to know that you're burdensome when I barely even know you? _Idiot_."

"Then why did you say that to me then?" Jisung asked, and Minho scowled at him. 

"Because I hate you, don't you know that? Or do you need another punch in the gut to learn that?" _Yeah, I do know that._ Minho placed his thumb and index finger under his chin, looking as if he was going to come up with a smart statement, "I think what I said is true, you are pretty burdensome, not that I am trying to meddle with you and your friend's business, but you made him really upset and cry." Jisung felt a huge pang in his heart, he made Hyunjin cry? And now that's another reason why he is a burden, he hurts people's feelings.

"I'm so horrible," Jisung muttered and covering his face with his hands.

"No shit," Minho quipped, and Jisung huffed as he stood up, not wanting to get into another heated argument with the brunette. The blonde ambled past Minho, turned left into the other hallway before sitting down on one of the steps in the stairway resting his head against his knees. Jisung wanted to be alone for now and think about his actions. First, he met this cold-hearted second-year student, who hates him and now probably views him as a bad person because of his outburst towards Hyunjin which hurt Hyunjin, and second he now feels like a quick-tempered monster, and maybe Hyunjin and the others don't want to be around a person like him anymore. 

As much as Jisung wanted to hold it in, the tears of self-hatred and pain managed to leak from his eyes. Each droplet represented pieces of regret and guilt that wetted spots onto his kneecap, something that he'd remember. Jisung wanted to fix it, he really did, but making Hyunjin cry was something he barely ever done, they rarely did things to each other that hurt them both. Well, except for that one time in middle school where he accidentally spilled milk onto his notes but Jisung quickly resolved it by letting Hyunjin use his notes instead. Lifting his head and wiping away the water streaks from his cheeks he checked the time displayed on his phone and sighed at the three minutes he had left till his literature class.

\--------

Jisung was in the middle of his literature class, listening to the introductory lecture the professor was giving about the elements of literature and how people could connect to the ideas of it, and have different emotions about not only about the narrator's life but also students own life. This class already seemed interesting, but Jisung didn't want to get too ahead of himself, it was only the first day of this class, so of course, it would seem interesting and easy. He was sure there were essays after essays waiting for him. 

This class was going well, he was completely absorbed into the lesson, but there was one thing that wasn't going well, it was the fact that Minho was sitting right behind him. Out of all the seats in the large class, Minho just had to choose the one in the row behind him. There was only one thing Jisung could point out that didn't make having the other behind him too bad, it was that Minho didn't bother him nor harass him. 

_Thump_. Jisung's attention towards the professor broke when he noticed the crumpled piece of notebook paper beside his own notebook. Not hesitating, he picked up the crumbled ball and opened it wondering who was the one behind it. He read the neat handwriting and frowned. The one behind it was the one behind him. Now everything about having Minho behind him was after all bad, the other was stressing him out.

_I couldn't stop thinking about your six-pack, did your weak lazy-ass take steroids for it? I'm sure someone like you doesn't work out._

All Jisung wanted was for Minho to stop harassing him and making him feel so terrible about himself, but the other wouldn't. Minho never failed to taunt him with painful words that stabbed and twisted him right in the heart, words that Jisung believed were true. Not the steroids thing though.

He wanted to write down that he doesn't take steroids and worked hard for the muscles but a different idea crossed his mind. Something much more reasonable, that wouldn't stir up consequences between them.

 _Look, can you please leave me alone? If you hate me so much can you just ignore my presence? It would make things easier for both of us_. And he crumpled back the paper and turned around to hand it to Minho who had on a smirk, a smirk that Jisung wanted to wipe from his face. 

Before he could pay attention to the lesson again, the paper landed next to his notebook again and Jisung picked it up and uncrumpled it to read it. 

_I can't._

_Why?_ He handed it back.

_Because_

_Because?_

_I can't._ That didn't make any sense for the blonde. Why was it so hard for the other to ignore him? Maybe Minho found satisfaction in humiliating him persistently, against Jisung's favors. Jisung decided not a write back reply, and just unzipped his backpack and shoved the paper in there before looking back forward trying to pay attention to the lecture. And the rest of the minutes remaining went by in a flash without Minho uttering or writing another word to him.

Jisung stuffed his notebook into his bag before getting out of this class in a rapid motion making sure to not bump into the students along the way. He stepped down the steps walked through more hallways before he left the University building entirely. As he dragged through the sidewalks he heard his phone make a notification sound. Jisung pulled his phone out from his jean pocket and checked the screen seeing that it was a message from Hyunjin. 

Hyunjin [2:04 PM]: We really need to talk, see you at our dorm.

He let out a sigh before putting his phone back into his pocket. Jisung really couldn't face Hyunjin after he had fumed on him and made him cry. Hearing from Minho that Hyunjin cried made Jisung's heart scrunch up in pain. 

He wanted to go back to their dorm, but his mind had other plans. Jisung walked past the University dormitory buildings and headed straight ahead where there were many shops. He reached a convenience store and stopped in front of an ATM machine to check his balance. Unzipping the smaller section in his backpack, Jisung pulled out his wallet and then pulled out his debit card. He placed the card into the small card slot to check the amount he had left to spend. 

"3700000 won?" Jisung quietly choked out, this was unbelievable for him. His brother added in more money to his bank account and Jisung doesn't spend much money unless he needed to. His brother was really kind and other than Seungmin and Hyunjin, his brother was also someone who cared so much about him. That was the same care Jisung wanted from his parents, but he and his parents have a toxic relationship right now. Therefore, Jisung was beyond pleased to be away from home. He is now able to pursue the dream he wants, not what his parents want for him. 

One of the reasons why his Highschool life was hell was because of how his parents forced him to study and get good grades, and they often compared him to his successful brother who is working as a CEO at a tech engineering company at the young age of twenty-five. Jisung was proud of his brother, but he wished his parents could understand that he couldn't follow his brother's steps. 

Biting his lips from the thought of his parent's, Jisung removed the card from the slot, taking note to himself to thank his brother for helping him with the expenses and placed the card back into his wallet and then the wallet into his bag before he slowly made his way into the convenience store. He hadn't been eating properly ever since he started University classes, but it was his fault, after all, he acted up a lot and skipped meals purposefully. 

He grabbed a bag of chips, and a can of soda before striding his way to the front counter to get these two items rung up. Once he paid the amount he left the place and took off his backpack and crouched down against a side of a building and placed his backpack next to him close to his body before fishing out his notebook and turned it to the next empty page. Jisung wrote down a few lyrics before opening his bag of chips and snacked on the crunchy and savory crisps before returning back to writing lyrics. 

He often wrote lyrics whenever he was upset or had a lot on his mind. The things traveling around his mind always ended up being written down on his special prized notebook. His notebook wasn't just any notebook, it was something that was apart of who he is. Jisung is someone who wants to tell his stories through music in the near future. 

After a little while, his phone made a notification sound again, and he took it out from his pocket only to see another message from Hyunjin. 

Hyunjin [3:54 PM]: Where are you? You're not back yet. 

Ignoring the message he placed his phone back into his pocket, before finishing up writing in his notebook and placed it back into his bag. Jisung drank his soda, stood up, and threw away the can and bag of chips before grabbing his backpack, heading back to his dorms. 

\--------

Jisung approached his dorm room door, standing in front of it with so many thoughts fizzling in his mind. He reached his hand onto the keypad and brushed his pointer finger against the cold bumps that had a number labeled on each of them, not pressing them yet. He felt too much nervousness build up in his chest, what was Hyunjin going to say to him? Is he mad? Was he going to cut ties with him and declare that they can't be friends anymore? It would hurt Jisung so much if Hyunjin decides not to be his friend anymore, they had a strong bond with each other, and Jisung didn't know what he could do without his Hyung. Maybe Hyunjin will turn to Seungmin, they are both close friends with each other as well. Jisung wasn't as close to Seungmin as he was Hyunjin. And Seungmin was the definition of a perfect friend, he is wise and clever, something Jisung wasn't. Those beliefs gnawed at his mind and he tried to shut them away. _I shouldn't jump into conclusions_. 

With a sigh, he pressed in the five-digit code, expecting Hyunjin to be standing there waiting to speak to him and point out his crude behavior. But his expectations shriveled once he closed the door behind him and turned to look at the black-haired male. Hyunjin was seated on his bed working on something and didn't even lookup upon Jisung's presence. Distressed, Jisung pulled himself together and walked over to his desk and sat down on his chair. He opened up his biology textbook and stared at the first unit blankly, his gaze was right on the animal cell with labels around it defining each part of the cell. _Hyunjin doesn't want to talk to me I guess_. 

"I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings," Jisung muttered out as he began writing down notes for the chapters. If Hyunjin didn't want to talk to him, Jisung might as well speak up for himself instead. "There was so much in my mind and I...uh had that outburst so I'm really sorry about that."

"So you really weren't okay?" Hyunjin said in an unelated way, and Jisung heard shifting coming from the bed and Hyunjin approached Jisung and tapped him on the shoulder, "Look at me." Jisung stood up from his chair and turned to face the black-haired male. "Why did you have to cover up how you feel and tell us that you were okay? Jisung you haven't been your usual self for these two days, and it's worrying me a lot."

"Why must you worry about me being sad?" Jisung responded back and Hyunjin let out a snort.

"Because we are best friends, Jisung!" Hyunjin snapped back, "And for fuck's sake, you are not a burden!"Jisung dropped his head not wanting to have eye contact with the other. "Jisung-ah...what made you think you were a burden?" 

"I-I hurt your feelings, I made you cry, I always make you worry," Tears welled up in Jisung's waterlines and they trickled out of his eyes dripping onto the floor. 

"Ah, Minho Hyung must have told you," Hyunjin meekly replied and the blonde raised his head gazing into the other's eyes. "I did cry...but _you_ didn't make me cry, I was hurt because I thought I wasn't being a good enough friend for you, I thought I've made you feel self-conscious around me."

"You are a good enough friend for me," Jisung sniffled.

"And you are _not_ a burden, Jisung. You are far from a burden," Hyunjin cupped Jisung's face and smiled at the blonde, wiping away the tears before they could race down Jisung's cheeks. "In my eyes, I see a confident, strong-willed best friend, who makes other people's days brighten up with his cute little sunny smile. You do have a high ego, but in a good way, you don't ever use your ego to bring others down, it just shows how happy you are with your achievements. You are a super talented person who never gives up on your dreams, and you are a good friend to me. So Jisung, don't ever call your self a burden. Because if you do, I will smack you to your senses you little bastard." 

"Okay, okay, I won't!" Jisung laughed and was a little flustered from Hyunjin's reassuring words. Hyunjin removed his hands from the blonde's face before raising his brow.

"Where were you though?" 

"Convenience store and then I sat somewhere to eat the snack I bought and wrote down more lyrics," Jisung stated, "And I may have seen your messages and ignored them."

"You little prick," Hyunjin playfully flicked Jisung in the forehead, "Your apology is not accepted." 

"Was my apology too weak?" Hyunjin nodded. 

"Hyunjin Hyung, I would like to apologize for lying to you and Felix, and I'm sorry for walking away from you," Jisung earnestly spoke.

"Hm, let me think about it," Hyunjin placed his index finger under his chin, thinking out loud.

"Will boba help?" 

"Apology accepted," Hyunjin smiled and Jisung playfully rolled his eyes.

"Okay then, after I finish my biology homework, we can go buy you boba."

" _And_ you will get something too because you haven't been eating properly."

"Alright fine," Jisung giggled, "I'll eat a lot."


	4. Minho everywhere

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Prepare for the 8k words up ahead >:D and prepare for more of Minho's bullying. I hope you enjoy this chapter~!

After his health class, Jisung made his way to the bathroom, the whole glass of orange juice he downed this morning had already filled up his bladder, but at least it made him feel full of vitamin c and a lot of energy. He held it in for two whole lectures and didn't want to go in between class breaks knowing that the bathrooms were crowded at that time, but empty at the beginning of lunch break. Jisung grabbed the cold smooth metal door handle and pulled the door open before stepping in. Looking at the stalls made the sensation in his bladder worse and he rushed past the occupied stall and locked himself in the furthest stall, letting it all out. _Ah, finally._

Once he was done, he flushed the toilet and was about to unlock the stall door to step out, but stopped when he was met with a familiar sound and Jisung rolled his eyes. The sounds of soft panting echoed in the bathroom and he heard some shifting before a quick zip was heard and this made Jisung turn beet red. Whoever the person is, which Jisung could assume was Minho was most definitely pleasuring themself in a University bathroom. Jisung had to give him credit for his bravery though. 

In a swift motion, Jisung unlocked the stall door and dashed out, wanting to hurry with washing his hands so that he didn't have to be stuck in the bathroom with Minho if that were to be Minho. Before he could even pass a few stalls, the door to the occupied stall opened and out stepped a sweaty Minho, holding onto his sports bag and he was staring at Jisung with that vain smirk of his.

Minho slung the bag on his shoulder before stepping over to the blonde and Jisung frantically took steps back. The fear was overtaking his body and he didn't know what Minho was planning on doing to him this time. _Please anything but harming me!_ Per each step Minho took forward, that was each step Jisung was taking back. He stepped back until his back bumped against the wall and he already felt himself crumble apart, he couldn't escape. His heart picked up speed as Minho inched closer to him, that smug look not leaving his face.

"I can tell you heard it again," Minho huffed leaning in closer to Jisung's face. The brunette's fringe looked a little damp from the sweat and he still seemed a bit out of breath. "You know curiosity kills the cat. You shouldn't be so nosy and hear what I do in the stall." Jisung's eyes shifted to the side, peering right at the open stall next to him seemingly interested in that toilet. He felt completely embarrassed but what could he do? The noises would considerably pike up anyone's interest because they sounded straight-up lewd. "Pft. Look at you, you should feel ashamed," He felt Minho grip onto his chin and he turned his face towards him forcing Jisung to look up at him.

"I-I'm sorry I-"

"It's been two times already, wouldn't you be curious the third time, hm?" Minho asserted cutting the blonde off in the middle of his sentence and he removed his hand from his chin. Jisung ended up lowering his head, he felt completely mortified and he could feel his face and ears heat up. Apart of him wanted to push past Minho and run out of the bathroom and go to a different bathroom to wash his hands but another part of him was screaming at him to stay in place and just face whatever Minho was intending on doing to him. If he ran wouldn't it make things even worse? Minho would be provoked if Jisung were to run off. 

"Just go, you piss me off," Minho sighed and turned to the side freeing some space for Jisung so that he can walk past him. The blonde was completely dumbfounded, he couldn't believe Minho was allowing him to get away. Taking his chance for granted, Jisung walked towards the bathroom sink, turned on the lukewarm water, and put the vanilla-scented soap onto his palm before rinsing his hand clean. After drying his hand, he stepped out of the bathroom and headed over to the cafeteria. 

Whilst he was approaching their table he felt a hand on his shoulder, which startled him a little bit and he instantly turned around seeing that it was only Chan with Changbin standing next to him and he curled his lips into a smile.

"Hey Ji, where were you heading?" Changbin asked.

"Um, over there," Jisung said pointing right at the table his friends were seated at.

"We'll join you," Chan smiled, "I would love to meet your friends." Jisung simply smiled and nodded in response and he leads the two to the table where his friends were at, happily chattering away. 

Their conversation died down once they saw Jisung standing there with two others behind him. Jisung's eyes wandered around feeling a little awkward, not knowing what exactly to say. His gaze then immediately locked on Minho who approached their table and sat down next to Jeongin, and the brunette followed their gazes and looked at the other end of the table right at Jisung. Jisung quickly stepped aside giving the two the spotlight, he'd rather have them introduce themselves instead. Chan laughed at Jisung's weird antic before he cleared his throat and gave them a friendly smile.

"Hello, I'm Chan, a second-year student, nice to meet you."

"And I'm Changbin, also a second year," Changbin cheerfully said, "Can all of you except Jeongin and Minho introduce yourselves?" Hyunjin, Felix, and Seungmin looked back and forth between Minho and Jeongin before turning their heads back towards Chan and Changbin

"I'm Hyunjin," Hyunjin waved.

"I'm Seungmin and one of the sanest ones here," Seungmin said with a smirk, earning glares from Hyunjin and Felix.

"Hey, I'm Felix, I came from Australia and I am trying hard to learn Korean well, so sorry for any mispronunciations," The white-haired male informed the two second-year students with a smile and Jisung noticed how Chan's eyes widened and he had an excited look on his face. 

"You're from Australia? Me too!" Chan exclaimed and Felix immediately leaped from his seat and dashed towards the other end of the table where Chan was standing and pulled him into a tight hug. 

"Brother!" Felix beamed and the older wrapped his arms around the white-haired male too. Everyone except for Seungmin stared fondly at the two Australians who were hugging each other with so much joy and Jisung's lips unknowingly curled into a smile. The two Australians pulled away from each other, their gleeful expression still hadn't gone away as they gave each other a knowing look. 

"Aussie! Aussie! Aussie!" They chanted together and Seungmin let out a groan from second-hand embarrassment before ducking his head down onto his arms. And Jeongin giggled at him before patting his back playfully.

"It's time to get to know each other," Changbin declared as he sat down at an empty chair beside Hyunjin, and Chan sat down next to Changbin. Felix stole the spot Jisung wanted to sit in, the spot that was next to Seungmin, but Jisung didn't mind it that much. But he changed his mind once he looked at the only remaining spot. This large table had exactly eight chairs, perfect. But there was now only one chair left, the chair at the other end of the table and it was next to Hyunjin, cool. But what's not cool was that Jisung would be literally across from the person who hated his guts entirely. 

Having no choice, Jisung gathered his courage and reached the other end of the table and sat down beside Hyunjin who was biting into his sandwich happily. Jisung lowered his gaze down at the smooth white table, taking in the color pretending to be interested in it so that he didn't have to look up at Minho. 

"So," Jisung heard Hyunjin speak and he turned to look at Hyunjin who had just finished his sandwich, "Are those your '3racha' friends you were talking about the other day? The ones in your music production class?" Jisung nodded as a response. "They are nice," the black-haired male smiled, making Jisung's lips curl into a smile, "I'm glad to see that your socially awkward self is making friends." And Jisung's smile dropped and he glared at Hyunjin.

"I'm not _that_ socially awkward," Jisung said defending himself and pouted, "I-I just seem like that, yeah."

"Funny," Hyunjin laughed and peered at Minho before he turned his eyes back towards the blonde, "You wouldn't even introduce yourself to Minho that night at the café, I had to introduce you." Jisung turned his gaze towards the Brunette and saw how he was blankly staring at the both of them. He didn't introduce himself to him because Minho is the scariest person he ever met. 

"I," Jisung tried to find an excuse as to why he did that. He couldn't just say that he was so absorbed into his phone that he didn't notice, he didn't want to come off as rude. Sadly, he couldn't find a proper excuse. "Okay, yeah you win, I am socially awkward." And this made Minho let out a snort. And Hyunjin nodded his head in agreement. 

"Don't worry about it~" Hyunjin chuckled and pinched Jisung's cheek and then Hyunjin cupped his face pressing his cheeks in as he swayed Jisung's head side to side, "You're so cute when you are shy Jisungie-ah~" And Jisung gave Hyunjin a big smile to enhance his cuteness.

"I'm cuter," Jeongin pouted, and Hyunjin snapped his attention from Jisung and turned his head to look at the youngest one in this table. Jeongin had a sulky look on his face and Jisung knew what this ment. 

"You're the cutest," Hyunjin cooed and leaned forward and patting the younger in the head who smiled with glee. 

"Augh cringe," Seungmin scoffed, making everyone at this table burst out into laughter. 

\--------

Jisung landed on his bed, frustrated with everything. Not exactly everything, but he just felt that way. He had music production class today with Chan and Changbin, and he forgot to bring his laptop, again. They seemed to really want to hear the work he had created, but Jisung was forgetful enough to not bring his laptop to school with him. He'd have to remind himself the next time he has this class with them. 

"Why the long face?" Hyunjin asked making Jisung sit up and look over at the black-haired male.

"I forgot to bring my laptop to music production class today, I wanted to show Chan Hyung and Changbin Hyung my work," Jisung sighed out.

"Ah, I'll try to remind you when you have that class," Hyunjin assured.

"Thanks, Hyung," Jisung smiled at him appreciatively. His phone making a notification sound alerted him and he reached for his phone and slightly smiled seeing that it was messages from the '3racha' group chat. He unlocked his phone and instantly checked the messages from the two of them.

Chan [2:45 PM]: Hey Jisung! Would you like to come over to our apartment to hang out with Changbin and me? 

Changbin [2:46 PM]: Please come~Let's bond, and maybe you can bring your laptop with you so we can hear your music

Jisung [2:47 PM]: Okay I'll come

Changbin [2:47 PM]: Yaaaay!!

Jisung [2:48 PM]: Uh where do you live though?

Chan [2:48 PM]: I'll just pick you up in front of your dormitory building, which dormitory building do you live in?

Jisung [2:49 PM]: The one east from the University.

Chan [2:49 PM}: Alright, I'll be there in ten minutes

Jisung turned off his phone and got out of his bed in one swift motion. He debated on whether or not he should keep this outfit on, and decided against it, he wanted to wear something comfortable and casual and not something that he had shown up to University in. Jisung grabbed a plain black shirt and black jean shorts before placing them on his bed. Before he turned to head into their bathroom, he meets with Hyunjin's eyes and the other seemed to be giving him a humorous look and a smirk was displayed on his lips.

"Are you finally going on a date?" Hyunjin said wiggling his eyebrows at the blonde. 

"What do you mean _finally_?" Jisung scoffed. Why would Hyunjin ask that question if Hyunjin was single as well? He does have someone he loves a lot but that doesn't change the fact that Hyunjin is still single.

"I mean, you finally have feelings for someone right? Is that why you were texting someone while smiling and got out of bed this fast?" Hyunjin laughed as he stood up from his bed, "This is the fastest I've ever seen you get out of bed." Jisung took off his shirt and threw it against Hyunjin's face playfully and the other let out a yelp and threw the shirt back at him. "Get your smelly clothes away from me!" 

"It's not a date," Jisung claimed and turned to head into their shared bathroom and he stared at his reflection in the bathroom mirror. His hair was still intact and neat, so he had nothing to worry about. He turned to head back out but stopped when he saw Hyunjin standing by the doorway with his smirk still lingering on his lips.

"I see you are checking yourself out," Hyunjin stated, "It really is a date huh? Don't worry you always look handsome and I'm sure your date will definitely swoon over you Jisung-ah."

"It's not a date, you idiot!" Jisung scowled.

"Yah! Be polite to your hyung," Hyunjin crossed his arms over his chest and sulked.

"Okay," Jisung replied rolling his eyes, "It's not a date, you idiot Hyung."

"If it's not a date what else is it? You were smiling widely while you were texting."

Jisung pushed past Hyunjin and walked over to his bed where he placed the clothes he wanted to wear. He grabbed his black shirt and pulled it on, "Chan and Changbin asked me if I wanted to hang out with them, so I said yes." He then proceeded by pulling off his jeans and then pulled on his black jean shorts. 

"You got yourself two-" Jisung quickly placed his hands against Hyunjin's mouth, silencing the other before he could complete his sentence.

"We are hanging out as friends Hyung, _friends_ ," Jisung explained narrowing his eyes at the other who was smiling with his eyes. The black-haired male gripped onto Jisung's wrist and pulled his hand away from his mouth.

"Okay, okay. I was kidding," Hyunjin raised his hands defensively, "Have fun there." Jisung let out a little laugh before putting on his vans sneakers and grabbed his phone and laptop shoving them into his backpack before approaching the door.

"What the fuck?" Hyunjin uttered out making Jisung turn to him in confusion, "You're really going to bring your freaking backpack there?" Jisung nodded in response.

"I have no other place to put my laptop in." Hyunjin shook his head as he sighed. He walked over to his closet, and Jisung watched as the black-haired male dug around the bottom of his closet for something. 

"Here, put your laptop in here," Hyunjin stood up and handed Jiusng an empty drawstring bag, "It'll be much easier to carry this with you compared to that whole-ass backpack with who knows how many textbooks." 

"Ah, thank you Hyung," Jisung smiled at the other before taking off his backpack and kneeling onto the ground. He pulled out his laptop and phone from his backpack and placed his laptop in the drawstring bag, and stood up. "I'll get going now, see ya when I get back."

"Have fun and I hope you come back here in one piece," Hyunjin waved.

"I'll try to," Jisung laughed and exited their shared dorm.

\--------

Chan and Jisung both walked through the beautiful and quiet hallways approaching the apartment both Chan and Changbin lived in. Their apartment was kind of far from the university but not too far since Chan drove here. Walking here would've been a pain in the ass for Jisung because it would take almost half an hour. Not that Jisung hated walking, he liked walking but mostly in the cool spring and fall mornings and nights, where the cool air touches his face in a calming way.

Once the two of them stepped inside the warm apartment, Jisung widened his eyes a little seeing that in the living room there was food already set on the coffee table in front of the grey colored couch. On the coffee table, there was pizza, a large bottle of coke, a large bag of chips, and a bucket of fried chicken, all placed around neatly on the table. Then he looked around from where he was standing and was in awe with how pretty and clean the living room looked. 

"Hey Ji!" Changbin greeted approaching the blonde, "I'm glad you came!"

"Thank you," Jisung smiled at the other. 

"Who is Ji?" Jisung's blood ran cold within an instant, but he tried his best to maintain his smile even though he heard Minho's voice not too far away. He turned his head towards the kitchen where the brunette's voice sounded and he saw Minho standing there just as shocked to see Jisung here as well. "Oh, _him_." Why does he have to say it like that? Jisung thought Minho sounded a little too petty.

"Come sit down and eat, we wouldn't want the food to get too cold," Chan says as he walks over to the couch and plops down onto the far end, and Jisung follows too and sat down next to Chan. Changbin approached the grey couch too and took a spot next to Jisung, and they all looked up at Minho waiting for him to sit down too. He was just standing there, first staring right at Chan, and then he gave Jisung a brief look and took a few steps back.

"Um, I think I should get going, I just stopped by to check up on you two, have fun!" Minho put on a forced smile and turned around heading straight towards the front door. Just as he was about to touch the doorknob Changbin let out a loud grumble, making Minho turn his head to the side and peer at the dark-haired male in confusion. "Is everything okay?" Minho asked.

"You're a big party pooper!" Changbin pouted, and Jisung tried his best to not laugh at Changbins pout and the look of defeat on Minho's face. "You make me so sad, what kind of-"

"Okay, I'll stay," Minho let out a sigh cutting him off and Changbin smiled pridefully. The brunette strode over to the couch they were sitting at and placed himself at the empty spot next to Changbin and stared at the food in front of him. 

"Would you guys like to watch a movie while eating?" Chan asked, and the three of them nodded. Chan turned on Netflix on the large flat-screen TV in front of them and they've spent a few minutes deciding on what to watch and they went with 'forgotten' Jisung had already watched that movie before but it was so interesting that he wouldn't mind watching it again. 

Chan pressed play and the movie started playing, and the four on the couch started placing the food on their plates and began eating. Although Minho was here, Jisung still was having quite a lot of fun. 

After finishing this movie they decided to watch another one, and then after that one, they watched another one, and it turned into a movie marathon. They did run out of the food midst of watching the third movie, but Chan went to the kitchen and brought them ice cream for dessert.

"Well, that was fun," Jisung smiled after they finished watching a total of five movies, each one of them being very interesting. 

"It's nice to hear from you that you are having fun," Changbin responded very cheerfully, "Let's clean up now, this coffee table is now a mess." He laughed, and they all helped Changbin clean up the coffee table and they threw away all the trash before they settled down onto the couch again in the same spot they sat down on earlier.

"So, Jisung-ah," Chan started and the blonde turned his head towards the blonde-haired second-year student and waited for him to continue speaking, "Tell us about yourself, we don't know a lot about you, besides that you like creating music, rapping, and singing." 

"Uh," Jisung couldn't think about things about himself that he could tell the three of them about. Their eyes staring right at him prompted him to think fast, he knows he shouldn't waste time thinking. "I love writing lyrics, I kind of like dancing, I love Cheesecake and Chocolate Cake..." Okay, Jisung thought that sounded boring. He wanted to say other things about himself, besides the things he likes, maybe he should tell them about his life? His life wasn't _that_ interesting, it was pretty basic other than his parents always nagging him. His eyes landed on Minho, and he held in his annoyance seeing that Minho didn't seem to be listening, he was just typing on his phone. _I should stop caring if he doesn't like me then be it._

"I've spent most of my childhood studying abroad in Malaysia, so I know English well," Jisung continued.

"You can speak English as well? That's nice," Chan beamed, "How was studying in Malaysia?"

"It was a good experience," Jisung softly laughed, "I also loved the food there and the places were so beautiful." 

"Ooh," Changbin replied with interest, "What made you love music though?"

"Ah, I just thought it was nice to put my emotions into songs. When I feel emotions I write how I feel and my experiences into meaningful lyrics hoping that one day I could present the songs to the world," Jisung says, a wide smile playing on his lips, "So that's why I create my music and sing, sometimes I even play the guitar." 

"You play the guitar too?!" Chan exclaimed widening his eyes. Jisung became slightly bashful. "What can you not do?!" Changbin got off from the couch alerting the three and they watched in confusion as he booked into a room. Jisung was baffled at that sudden action and so were the other two, even Minho had his eyes away from his phone and peered over the head of the couch. Seconds later Changbin returned into the living room holding onto a guitar. He walked over to the couch, sat down at his original spot, filling in the gap between Minho and Jisung, and handed Jisung the guitar he retrieved from the room. 

"You wouldn't mind playing the guitar for us, would you?" Changbin asked with puppy eyes, and Jisung thought to himself for a few seconds and decided he should, those big puppy eyes Changbin was giving him were irresistible.

"Okay," Jisung says, running his hand through the guitar. It felt to smooth and untouched. His fingers approached the strings and he felt the smoothness of the strings against his fingertips, he loved this feeling. It's been two weeks since he last played, but that doesn't mean he couldn't play. Once he thought about one of his songs he wanted to sing, he finally started playing and the three of them listened and watched.

"What the fuck! You're amazing!!" Changbin clapped once Jisung had finished singing and playing the guitar to one of his softest songs. That song was one of his favorites songs. Although he knew he could sing and play the guitar well, he still became very bashful upon Changbin's compliment.

"I'm not that amazing," Jisung uttered out, smiling shyly.

"He is just like Minho-ah, he gets flustered and humble with compliments," Chan says, looking back and forth between Minho and Jisung. The two looked at each other, Minho giving him a slightly cold look and Jisung was still flustered, the blonde was pretty sure he wasn't that much like Minho. "They might be soulmate-"

"What are you talking about? We don't have much in common," Minho says quickly looking at Chan, "Maybe being humble is just that one similarity we have, otherwise we aren't that similar with each other." 

"You have a point," Changbin laughed and then turned his head to the blonde, "But seriously you are so talented, you can sing beautifully, rap powerfully _and_ play an instrument, you should go audition somewhere, they will probably accept you in an instant." Jisung hung his head hiding how flustered he was and spent a few seconds collecting himself and trying to calm himself down before peering back at Changbin. 

"I can't," Jisung says, he felt dejected. He really couldn't go to the path of being an idol. "I would if I had the chance, but I just can't" 

"Why not?" Chan asked in a concerned tone. There were two main reasons why. One is that he didn't like being in front of large crowds and two, his parents. His parents would get angry seeing that he returned to this hobby of his and not studying. 

"I, uh, lied," Jisung stammered and Minho turned his head towards the blonde in interest probably from hearing that last word. "I lied to my parents to get here."

"To this university?" Changbin asks, raising a brow. Jisung nods as a response and again, lowered his head, and played with the hem of his shirt. Changbin placed a hand on his shoulder and squeezed it lightly, "You can tell us if you want to, maybe it will make you feel better." Jisung contemplated whether he should tell them the story of his life or not. The only people that knew everything that happened was his older brother, Seungmin and Hyunjin, and no one else. It couldn't be that bad to tell them, would it? Jisung could see the concern on Changbin's face, maybe they would understand how he feels? 

"Well, my passion for music all started when I started middle school, I discovered that I love writing out my emotions as song lyrics and that's how I coped with the sadness I often felt back then. My parents were okay with it, and they let me buy a guitar and I was happy that they did. I would play it often and sing, and it was like my escape," Jisung says with a slight smile on his face, that was the cheerful part of his story. He looked at them and they seemed to be listening patiently. "That was all until highschool approached and my parents brought back the topic of having me be like my older brother who is a successful CEO of a tech company, he had all the smarts and ranked the highest in high school and my parents wanted me to follow his steps. They even found out about Seungmin's academic success and compared me to him as well. I couldn't be like him or my brother, I had different dreams, I wanted to focus more on music," Jisung let out a sad sigh looking at the three of them once again before he continued.

"I told them exactly that, I told them that I couldn't follow my brother's footsteps, I couldn't be like him. No matter how much I tried to persuade them to let me do what I love they declined and told me to study or else they would ban me from doing anything music-related and would get rid of my notebook that had all my songs written in it. They said that as long as I get 90's or higher I could still do music as only a hobby, but not a major hobby. It was going well until I had to show them my fucking report card. I had 90's in everything except for math and history, which I got the horrific grade of 80 and they were pissed. So the next day when I returned from school, I headed to my room and..." Tears filled Jisung's waterlines and they were on the verge of falling. The next part was going to be the hardest to tell. 

"O-Once I opened the door to m-my room," Jisung sniffed, "I was shocked to see my guitar broken and my notebook ripped apart into several small pieces. And my mom who followed me to my room had a smug look on her face and I asked her why she had done that, and she answered my question by slapping me and telling me that my grades are horrible because I was focusing more on music and that it is a waste of time and left. But that didn't make me give up. When I told my brother, the only person in my family who cared about me, he bought me a new guitar and notebook and I continued with my hobby when my parents weren't around, and when they were around I studied. It worked out pretty well" Jisung smiled, never would he ever give up on music, it was his life.

"Wow, they seem so strict," Chan frowns, "They shouldn't have ripped up all your hard work like that, you must have been very upset."

"Not really," Jisung laughs making them all puzzled, "The day they threatened that they would get rid of my notebook, I made sure to take pictures of every single page, so I wasn't too upset about the ripped notebook, I was mostly upset about the broken guitar. I re-wrote all the lyrics onto my new notebook and made sure to keep it hidden from them."

"What the fuck, you are so brilliant!" Changbin exclaims with happiness and pulls Jisung into a quick hug and patted him on the back before pulling away.

"Wait, what did you lie to your parents about though, to get here?" Chan asked. _Right, I didn't answer that question,_ Jisung thought to himself, mentally face-palming himself. 

"Well they didn't want me to study far away, thinking that I'd pick up my old habit, but I managed to convince them by saying that I applied for the engineering major and they were so proud. Oh, how fucking much I hated the proud look on their faces. I wanted to go to the same university as Seungmin and Hyunjin mainly because I still wanted to be with them and far away from my parents, and thankfully the three of us got accepted," Jisung said joyously, "But applying for the engineering major was the lie I told them, I actually applied for performing arts."

"Ah, so your parents are the obstacle to your dreams?" Chan questioned and Jisung responded with a single nod. "Don't ever give up on your dreams because of them. I love how dedicated you are." 

"Yeah, if I were in your place I would say fuck it all and I'd do what I like," Changbin asserted. 

"I'll try to continue with my passion," Jisung says, confidently, "Giving up is something I never what to do."

"That's the spirit, Jisung!" Chan smiled.

For the rest of the time, Jisung presented them the music and the songs he produced and they were astonished, saying that he was too good for the advanced music production class and again, Jisung was flustered. They also spent time talking more about themselves and Minho would barely talk unless he was asked a question by either Chan and Changbin, he was being a little too quiet. Even Chan asked Minho why he was so quiet when he usually was very loud, and Minho just shrugged it off saying that he was tired. Jisung knew the exact answer, Minho didn't like being around him, that's why. He wanted to ask him if he had done anything wrong to him, he wanted to get rid of their tension and start over, but was that even possible?

\--------

Jisung woke up to a heavyweight on him, what was that weight? He grimaced a little and attempted to shift to his side but he couldn't because of that weight on him. He opened his eyes and once his vision cleared up, he widened his eyes in horror. Jisung was screwed, very screwed. On top of him laid Minho, his face was pressed against Jisung's neck making the blonde blush a little, he could literally feel his lips touch his neck. Minho's warm breathes brushed against the nape of his neck making Jisung shudder a little.

From his spot he looked around and realized he was still in the apartment, Jisung must have fallen asleep here and Minho as well. If Minho wakes up Jisung was sure the brunette would react very badly and probably blame it all on him.

"Hey, Chan," Jisung saw Changbin step into the living room, a wide smile was plastered on his face, "Look here." Oh god, this is so embarrassing. Chan arrived in the living room and he smiled at the sight in front of him, laughing a bit too.

"They are so cute," Chan cooed, "They fit each other so well." _Unbelievable_ , Jisung thought to himself. He and Minho did not suit each other, they were like fire and fire. If they even near each other the fire would just grow bigger. If they couldn't get along with each other and be friends then how would he even except to be in a relationship with someone who disliked him this much? Jisung gave them a pleading look, trying to get them to help him get Minho off of him, but they were still standing there looking so entertained from the sight of the two on the couch. 

"Is it morning already?" Jisung heard Minho grumble against his neck, the sound vibrated onto his neck and he felt the lips brush against his skin. Then he watched as Minho lifted his face and when he saw Jisung's face he literally jumped off of him and stepped away from the couch, staring at him wide-eyed.

"Y-You," Minho says, pointing accusingly at the blonde, "You were behind this all!" Jisung wanted to tell him that he didn't do anything, but kept his mouth closed, Minho was going to blame him no matter what. Defending himself wasn't going to help much.

"As you may already know, I don't sleep," Chan says casually as if not sleeping was completely normal for him, this was concerning Jisung. "I stayed in the living room to work on a few things and I felt movement and, Minho, you moved to lay on top of Jisung while you were asleep. Even at two am, you were mumbling things in your sleep, it was so funny and made my time studying pretty amusing for once." Minho turned beet red and let out a scoff afterward. "I couldn't help but tell Changbin everything you mumbled out in your sleep."

"Wha-"

"Okay you two, breakfast is ready," Chan smiled, cutting Minho off and he turned to head to the kitchen, with Changbin trailing behind him. Minho gave one brief look at Jisung before he also strolled into the kitchen. 

Jisung sighed to himself before going over to the kitchen, and he sat down at an empty chair right across from Minho. Jisung looked down at his plate of food and widened his eyes a little at the delicious smelling breakfast in front of him, "You didn't have to cook me a meal, you've already done so much."

"You're our new friend, so of course we would do a lot for such a sweet and kind person like you," Chan smiled, "Now eat while the food is nice and warm."

After a couple of minutes, they've finished eating their meal and Changbin collected the empty dishes for them and went over to the sink to wash them. 

"Sorry for keeping you guys here for the night, both of you fell asleep here and I didn't want to wake you up and send you home in the middle of the night," Chan says.

"I have a car, I could drive myself back to my apartment," Minho frowns meeting Jisung's gaze, giving him a stern look. 

"Still, it's pretty dangerous out there," Chan states, "How did you guys sleep?"

"I slept well, once again thanks for everything," Jisung responded with a smile. 

"I slept very well on top of Jisung, it was so comfortable," Minho sarcastically muttered back, crossing his arms over his chest, "So, what was it that I said in my sleep?"

"I won't tell you yet~" Chan teased.

"Changbin, can you tell me?" Minho turned around eyeing Changbin who was washing the dishes.

"No," He snickered, and Minho let out an angry sigh before turning back around.

"You guys are betrayers." 

It was already seven fifty-five, and Jisung knew he should get going now, walking back would take half an hour and he needed to get back to shower real quick and go to university later than usual. He and Hyunjin usually arrived there at around 8:10, but Jisung estimated that today he would be there _way_ past that usual time. He'd probably miss out on breakfast with his newfound friends.

"Thank you guys for inviting me over, I had a great time," Jisung smiled at the two, carefully holding onto his drawstring bag, not wanting to drop his expensive laptop somehow.

"I'm glad you did," Changbin returned the smile, "But are you sure you don't want to be dropped off at your dorm?" Jisung shook his head, he didn't want to bother them that much, they also had classes to get ready for and they had done so much for him. They invited him over, they watched movies and ate food with him, they listened to the story of his high school life and provided him with the moral support he didn't know he needed.

"It's fine, I should get going now," Jisung says, giving Chan and Changbin a smile of assurance, trying to convince them that he will be okay with walking back to the dorms. He needed the exercise anyway, kind of? Walking couldn't be too bad, it was currently a spring morning and he does love walking in the spring mornings. He waved them goodbye before he turned and opened the door and stepped out of their apartment before quietly closing the door behind him. 

"A long boring walk, here I come," Jisung softly muttered to himself and dragged his feet through the hallway until he reached the elevator.

\--------

"I have a bad feeling that he will be late," Chan sighed placing himself onto the couch seconds after Jisung left this apartment. Changbin headed straight into his shared room with Chan to start dressing up for class. Minho not caring about what Chan just said, sat down on the far end of the couch and rested his cheek against his palm. "Minho-ah." Minho turned his gaze towards the blonde curly-haired male. "Isn't your first-class psychology today?" Minho nods at the question, and he sees how Chan slightly smiles. "And that class starts at ten thirty, correct?" Again, Minho nods but he gives the other a suspicious look. 

"Why are you asking these things Hyung? You clearly know my entire schedule," Minho says calmly. 

"Well, you see..." Chan awkwardly smiles, "My class starts in an hour, and yours start in two hours and thirty minutes, therefore you have a lot more time compared to me." Minho raises a brow wondering what Chan was even trying to hint. "So you wouldn't mind dropping off Jisung would you? Your apartment is only five minutes away from the university and you can drop Jisung off at his dorm then go to your apartment." 

Oh hell no, he wasn't going to take that tree rat in _his_ car all the way back to his dorms, he was sure Jisung could walk himself and if it were too much a hassle for his lazy legs to walk he could just take the bus, it was that fucking simple. Giving Jisung a ride would be the last thing he'd do. 

"No," Minho bluntly responds making Chan's face contort to the one of disappointment. 

"And why not?" Chan asks.

"Beca-"

"Because he doesn't like Jisung," Changbin says for Minho but that wasn't even what Minho was going to say, he was going to tell Chan that he had to some important things to do, even though he doesn't.

"Ah, that explains the tension between the two," Chan sighs, shaking his head, still looking pretty unflattered with Minho's little attitude. "They didn't even utter a single word to each other. And why do you dislike him?"

"I don't dislike him," Minho lied, "I'm just not very fond of a person like him, he seems so..." He couldn't really think of a negative thing to say about Jisung, the blonde was a nice boy who smiled often around his friends, he was talented and seemed innocent, but Minho didn't find a liking for him. Did he? "To me, he seems pretty conceited," Minho concludes and Changbin rolls his eyes.

"Jisung? Conceited?" Chan laughs, "No way Minho, no way. Jisung is very far from conceited and that long pause you had there before saying what you thought about him shows that you don't think of him in a bad way." _Why must I know someone like Chan?_ Minho bitterly thinks to himself. "The things that you mumbled in your dream also confirmed a few things." Minho desperately wanted to know what he said unknowingly while he slept, he hoped it was nothing embarrassing. But they wouldn't tell him yet. When will they?

"Minho, disliking people is very unlike you," Changbin points out, "You never really dislike someone spot on, you're such a kind-hearted pretty soul." Minho snorts at Changbin's statement. _I dislike Jisung spot on, he is so naive and annoying._

"Now be a very kind soul and help Jisungie get back to his dorm," Chan crosses his arm over his chest and that stern look he had on his face showed that he wasn't going to take a no as an answer. But Minho will fight through it and try his best to get away with it and not have to waste his time taking the blonde tree rat back to his dorm. 

"Sorry no can do, I got things to do," Minho says, standing up and Chan gave him a look of disbelief.

"What things do you even need to do? Sleep in?" 

"Maybe?"

"If you take him, I'll buy you ramen two times every week for this whole month," Chan tried to bribe the other. And yeah, Minho was definitely up for free ramen twice a week for a month. Anything for ramen even if it means giving the person he dislikes the most a ride back to his dorm. 

"Deal," Minho smirked, liking the idea very much.

"I knew it," Changbin sneered. 

\--------

"Now where is this tree rat? He couldn't have gone too far by now, hasn't it only been like ten minutes?" Minho mumbled to himself as he drove through the road, looking around for the annoying blondie. It was getting irritating. What if he took a different route or something? Minho was wise enough to know that Jisung was most likely using a GPS to find his way back since he was new to this area. He must be using the common route or something and Minho went through the most simple route, the route Jisung most likely was using. 

He kept multitasking, focusing ahead on the road, then left and then right. Once he spotted a familiar skinny blonde male with those black denim shorts looking down at his phone as he walked, Minho turned on the right turn signal before he smoothly neared the sidewalk. He lightly cackled to himself when he saw the blonde flinch. _That's what you get you bastard._ Jisung looked to his side seeing his car and he stared at the window with his eyebrows raised. Minho rolled his eyes in annoyance before rolling down the window on the passenger side.

"Get in," Minho sternly says, he just wants to get this all over with and get the damn ramen he deserved. When he saw that Jisung wasn't budging Minho let out a long irritated sigh, the blonde was wasting his fucking time. "I said get in." Jisung walked over to Minho's car and gave him an uninterested expression. _If he fucking tests me I swear I'm going to twist his neck_.

"I have two legs," Jisung says blankly. _You little fuck_.

"So?" 

"I can walk." 

"Just get in, you'll make it to the dorms faster that way," Minho points out, but the blonde still looked like he didn't want to get in. 

"I'm fine with walking, see you later Hyung," Jisung waves. _Hyung?_ He didn't know why he felt so touched. Minho snapped back into attention when he noticed Jisung was starting to walk away and Minho who did not want to lose his reward from Chan, swiftly opened the door and rushed to the blonde and grabbed him by the wrist. Ignoring his protests he quickly opened the passenger door and pushed Jisung in.

"Yah! I said I can walk!" Minho closed the door and locked the door to ensure that Jisung doesn't exit his car while Minho goes to sit in the driver's seat. Minho finally sat back down at his spot on the driver's seat and drove back onto the road heading the direction that led to the University.

"You didn't have to take me," Jisung says sighing after the last word. "It was just twenty more minutes of walking." Minho continued to ignore this blonde who was blabbering too much to his liking, can't he just be quiet? Minho didn't even want to take him in the first place. It seems like Jisung noticed that Minho didn't want to talk, so the blonde didn't say anything else and pursed his lips in frustration. Silence, that's how Minho liked it.

"Minho Hyung, do you dislike me?" It hasn't even been two minutes and this tree rat was talking _again._ Minho tried his best to hold back a groan, all he wanted was silence. But that question made him feel so bad for some reason. When Jisung asked that question his voice sounded so soft and pained and it seemed like he thought before asking.

"No," Minho responds, and in his peripheral vision, he sees Jisung's expression brighten up a bit. "I _hate_ you." And there he sees Jisung sulk, and look out the window. That must've hurt him pretty bad. 

"Then why-"

"I'm giving you a ride because I have a lot of time left before my class starts, almost around two hours and my apartment is five minutes away from the university so I can just drop you off on my way back. I didn't intend to do this, Chan felt bad for you and he literally bribed me by saying that he'd buy me ramen twice a week, every week for a month and I couldn't miss out on free food like that," Minho explained knowing that Jisung was going to ask why he was driving him to the dorms if he hated him. 

"Oh," Jisung muttered, sadness laced his voice. 

"I will have to wipe that seat you're sitting in completely clean, I don't want any Jisung smell surrounding the inside of this precious car, you'll make the value rot," Minho says in a bit of a rude way and when he noticed Jisung frown and avert his gaze down at his jean shorts, he started to feel bad. Should he give this kid a break? He was only a first-year, and Minho felt like he was bullying him a little too much. He was kidding about wiping that seat clean, he was too lazy to do so, and didn't care if Jisung's smell lingers in the car. 

"Thank you for giving me a ride even if you didn't want to, and thank Chan too for me," Jisung says once they reach the front of his dormitory building. He smiled slightly at Minho and Minho didn't smile back. The blonde closed the door and started heading his way inside the dormitory building. _Mission, completed. Ramen, I'll see you later. Chan's money, bye-bye._

Minho sighed with relief, he got this over with and now he could enjoy ramen. Before he placed his hand on the steering wheel again, in the corner of his eyes he noticed Jisung's drawstring bag right under the passenger seat and Minho let out a grumble. _This motherfucker_. And he picked up the bag that had Jisung's laptop inside it before getting out of his car and running into the building. 

He saw Jisung enter the elevator. "Fuck," Minho mumbled and ran to the stairs, he climbed up the first set of stairs, reaching onto the second floor and he smiled in victory seeing the blonde make his way through the hallway and stop in front of his dorm room door. 

Minho followed after and when Jisung opened the door and stepped inside, Minho tapped him on the shoulder making the blonde tense up a bit before he turned around, he gave Minho a puzzled look.

"Here you forgot this you forgetful rascal," Minho scoffed handed Jisung his bag, "Don't forget things next time." 

"T-Thanks," Jisung softly replied and Minho turned around and walked away, happy that he completed this hectic mission and could finally go back to his apartment and rest for a bit before heading to his psychology class. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I guess this chapter will be the last boring chapter lol :')) there is going to be so much happening from now on, and more intense Minsung moments xD


	5. Don't you hate me?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay in updating this chapter, I wasn't satisfied with how this chapter was turning out and had been constantly trying to edit it and make it seem less choppy, haha, but here it is and I hope you enjoy it!

Two weeks had gone by within a flash, within those two memorable weeks were drastic amounts of change - it was a good type of change actually. Jisung couldn't help but feel proud that their newly formed friend group had grown accustomed to each other to the point they'd crack bad jokes and still laugh like crazy, easily making them become one of the loudest in the entire cafeteria. In this new friend group, each one of them had a certain favorite friend of course. Changbin and Felix were basically partners in crime now; inseparable, and they shared so much in common. Seungmin developed a liking for one of the only other sane person in this group, Chan. And Hyunjin, of course, loved Jisung and Jeongin both - though he loved Jeongin more romantically. Jisung loved them all but was still closer to Hyunjin who he had been friends with since middle school and Seungmin who he was friends with since they started the second year of high school.

Minho well...he was close to everyone in the group except for Jisung of course and Jisung felt like the odd one out because of that. He would feel saddened whenever Minho laughed with the others but never even cracked a single sincere smile at him. 

There was a specific change Jisung highly desired; he craved the impossible. Jisung felt that he should just laugh at himself, tell himself that he is stupid for thinking such a thing, or maybe ask Seungmin to hit him with a book because Jisung felt that he needed to knock some common sense into his head. He wanted to be on good terms with Minho, that's what he wanted, he wanted to be friends with him. Now, this is like asking a very hungry lion to not eat him alive. He knows this goal was unobtainable. 

Surprisingly enough, Hyunjin being the usual alert friend he was, caught on with the mini-war between Jisung and Minho and even questioned it last week - only to have Jisung shrug it off and tell him that he is just overthinking and that Minho was just quiet. That was all lies, sort of. Lying to Hyunjin pained him, however, Jisung couldn't help himself. He didn't want Hyunjin and Minho's friendship to break apart, so that's why Jisung tried to conceal the truth. 

"Jisung can we talk?" Jisung hears Hyunjin say with a gentle voice and the blonde looks over at his extremely caring friend. What was it that he wanted to talk about? Jisung nods without verbally questioning anything. "So, uh, I know you've already said that it was nothing, but tell me the truth okay? What is really going on between Minho and you?" _Here it goes again_ , Jisung thought to himself downheartedly. 

"Hyunjin Hyung, nothing is going on between us, really," Jisung assures.

"Jisung, don't lie to me, you know I can read you pretty well," Hyunjin sighs staring deep into Jisung's attentive orbs, "You are uncomfortable around him."

"What makes you think that?" His uncomfortableness could be obvious to the others but Hyunjin was the only one who spoke up to Jisung about it. He could understand what made Hyunjin question everything; after all, he and Minho never talked to each other contentedly, the only times they ever talked was when they encounter each other at the weirdest times, like how they did in the bathroom. 

"Your actions _duh_ ," Hyunjin sniggers before composing himself again and contorted his face into a somewhat stern expression, "What's making you feel that way around him? Maybe you will feel better once you let it out to me."

"Minho hates me," Jisung mumbled, defeated, finding it pretty difficult to keep the truth locked up inside him - especially with the freaking glint of concern in the eyes of the other. Jisung knows that Hyunjin is never going to consider backing down whenever something was going on with Jisung. Hyunjin was trying his best to be a good friend to the blonde, but Jisung believes that Hyunjin is already doing enough. He always showered Jisung with love and kept an eye on him. Jisung appreciated his concern and all, but sometimes Hyunjin needed to relax and take care of himself as well.

"Wait, what?!" Hyunjin exclaims, bewildered. Yeah, it's surprising news considering that the friend group sees Minho as the greatest and the sweetest person to ever exist; Jisung didn't disagree though, Minho can be a positive charm but maybe a bad charm to Jisung. The blonde knows that in Minho's eyes he is just a crawling annoying pest that can never truce with Minho. 

"Yeah, you heard it right Hyung..." Jisung trails off, "He completely hates my soul and probably wants me to vanish from his view."

"Lee Minho, a completely kind, soft-hearted person hates _you_ a burst of literal sunshine, with squishy cutesy cheeks and has the world's best smile?" As much as those words touched Jisung a lot and made him feel flustered, he thought that those qualities alone weren't enough to make him feel that he was worthy of gaining a liking from the grinchy person. 

"You got that right," Jisung sighs, and Hyunjin frowned in sympathy.

"What makes you think he hates you though?" 

"Minho acts cold around me, glares at me as if he is trying to murder me through his eyes and _never_ talks to me happily," Jisung explains and he could see how Hyunjin's lips were slightly parted and his brows were knitted together in worry and disbelief of course. It was expected.

Hyunjin places his index finger and thumb right under his chin, thinking aloud, "Hmm, I don't get it, Minho doesn't seem like a hateful person at all? I'll not jump into conclusions or beat him up tomorrow, but what I am planning on doing is examining him more, maybe I could get something off of him and see why he behaves that way towards you and only you," Hyunjin avowed sounding like a scientist that is trying to uncover a mystery, and this is when Jisung realizes that he has biology homework to do. Maybe after this conversation? Jisung felt too run down to move a single inch.

"Wait, so uh, your friendship with him isn't affected right?" Jisung asked, hoping that his admitted truth wouldn't affect the two dancers' beautiful friendship - Minho didn't deserve it, he only treated Jisung cruelly and no one else.

"Is that what got you worked up this entire time?" Hyunjin's mouth flattens into a firm line and Jisung sheepishly nods.

"Yeah, I didn't tell you sooner because I didn't want to crush your friendship with him."

"Nah, it didn't, now I'm just confused," Hyunjin shrugs, "So that's why I will see what exactly I can do." 

"Thanks," Jisung beams.

"Anytime, Jisung-ah, anytime," Hyunjin returns the smile. 

\--------  
  


Jisung reached his literature class, a class he dreaded completely but at the same time didn't anymore. Ever since the day Minho passed him the insulting note assuming that his muscles were fake, Jisung took note to never sit near Minho if possible, Jisung always chose the row that was in the back. And Minho, on the other hand, chose the seats that were more in the front.

"Okay dear students," Professor Lim, a stern literature professor speaks in an unforeseen enthusiastic voice and had on a smile, a fucking smile! It shocked Jisung a little bit because most of the time professor Lim looked so done and just wanted to get his day over with. "Today is going to be an exciting lecture, we will focus on poems!" _Maybe he likes poems a lot?_ Jisung questions in his mind. "And as a starter, today you guys will create your poems, and present it to the class. You have thirty minutes to write your poems, make sure to be creative as you can and no plagiarism! It should all be purely your work. You may now get started."

Jisung was completely petrified, once the word 'present' was voiced by the professor, all Jisung wanted to do was quietly get out of this class and run back to his dorm and cry his eyes out. He would actually, but his grade mattered so much to him, he needed to keep his grade standing on the higher end. If it does slip his parents would kill him; well they wouldn't know about his grades unless they manage to get it from the school or ask Jisung.

Jisung held his head with his hands and pressed his fingers firmly into his scalp. Present? How the heck could he do that? Present in front of this entire class full of thirty or forty students? He imagines himself standing in front of the large class - the students staring right at him with blank faces and making fun of him once he finishes reading his poems aloud for being such a nervous wreck. 

He rips out a piece of paper from his notebook and holds onto his lead pencil. That's all he does for the first few minutes, holds onto his pencil, and stares blankly at the blank piece of paper having no thought on what to write. All he could think about was the student's eyes on him when he presents. Is there any way he could excuse himself from presenting? The professor seemed quite joyous today maybe he could excuse him from this? No way. Sighing he played around with his lead pencil while thinking about what he could write. Maybe Cheesecake? Plain and simple. He'll just write a few lines and it's all good. Immediately he gets to work, he just wanted to wing this shit. 

"Okay, thirty minutes are up! I can't wait to hear what you guys came up," Professor Lim happily exclaims. "Who would like to volunteer to go first?" The first student raised their hand and the professor nodded at her, letting her come down the steps from the auditorium seats. She cleared her throat, introduced herself, and starting reading off her poem with a confident smile on her face and a strong clear voice as if she were presenting a speech. All that did was make Jisung sulk - he couldn't be like her; confident with her poem and brave. 

One by one the students went up to present their poems, some poems were very impressive others sounded rushed, some students stuttered and were playing with their paper, and others assertively read through their poems. Each time a student went up to present their poems, Jisung grew more anxious knowing that soon enough he'd be the one up there. He tried to think of a way to escape this torture, maybe fake being sick? But that would only bring more attention. Maybe he could say that he needed to use the bathroom? However, that would make him appear rude for leaving during presentation time. What could he do? 

The planning in his head stopped once in his peripheral vision he notices Minho stand up from his seat and begins walking down the steps and towards the front of the class. He turns to the class, gives a big cheeky smile and winks. Jisung grimaces at that, he does seem very cocky. Jisung then narrows his eyes at the other and sucks in Minho's features, he never really paid much attention to Minho's...outstanding looks. How could he be so drop-dead gorgeous? He has a beautiful round slim face, a perfectly slim nose, soft pink lips, and big brown glittery eyes. Jisung then drags his gaze further down Minho's body and he couldn't help but widen his eyes. Minho was wearing a black shirt, which was tucked in his almost skin-tight black ripped skinny jeans showing off his slim lean figure. Hyunjin was certainly not wrong about those thighs, those thighs were muscular. Minho does look like a dancer type especially with that type of body. His body is _perfect_. 

Minho clears his throat dramatically and flashes a huge grin showing off his white teeth, "Ah...okay, hello, I'm Lee Minho, but you can just call me Minho," He says coolly and brushed his long fringe from his eyes. "I'll read my poem now, I hope you'll like it," He gives one last look at the class before looking down at his paper. "Meeting your eyes for the first time had brought in these weird feelings in me. Could it be love? Your bright smile lights up my lonely heart. You're all I desire, yet I tear you down. Sometimes I want to break you apart but still put you all back together. I turn myself away from you, and it's a pain. I want to reach you, my only love." Claps erupted from the class and Minho bowed before walking back to his seat. His poem was very interesting and it sounded like he had a breakup or a love-hate relation, Jisung wondered who made Minho feel that way.

Afterward, a few more students gone up to present and Jisung was chewing at the skin beside his fingernails his nervousness was getting uncontrollable and he just wanted to hide behind a rock and cry. 

"Jisung...Jisung...Han Jisung...." The professor's voice was inaudible in his mind. His mind was completely drowned with fear and worry. Calm down? What was calming down? Could he calm down? The tap on his shoulder brought him back to reality.

He abruptly stands up - he regretted that because he started to feel dizzy. With his best effort, Jisung walks down the steps, as he passed by each row of seats; dread started building upon him at an impossibly quick rate. He nears the professor who flashes him an encouraging smile and Jisung turns to the class and feels himself freeze up. He eyes all the students and they were looking right at him just as he imagined. _Oh no_. He felt panic build up inside his stomach, his hands were shaking vigorously as he lifted his paper. He could hear laughter echoing in his mind, mocking him and bringing him down.

"H-Hi?" He softly muttered out, "I'm Han Jisung, and I'll r-read you my-" He bites his lips and looks down at his poem. He made it short and simple so that he didn't have to stand in front of the class for too long.

"I-I'm okay, I really am," He lets out a breathy nervous laugh; it was more like he was assuring himself rather than the people who had their eyes focused on him. Tension began growing around his body, his legs felt numb, his arms felt like they were going to fall off, the hairs on his neck stood up straight and when he looked back up at the students, a chill of fear ran down his spine. He gazed around - studying their expressions trying to see if they were smiling, laughing, or mocking him for being such a coward, such a chicken, such a weak, such a...his eyes then landed on Minho who looked completely pale and panic-ridden, why was he panicking? 

"M-My poem..." He knew he sounded straight up like an idiot, an idiot who couldn't communicate efficiently. How could something so easy like presenting make him react like this? He thought he was such a shame. "I-" He gave up. He turned towards the door and rushed out of the class. _Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid._ When he was finally out of the mind torturing class he crashed down onto his knees and pressed his face against his hands sobbing out the feelings of humiliation he felt.

"Ji- oh," He heard a honey-like voice, Jisung removed his hands from his face and turned his head and gazed at Minho's through his teary eyes. 

Minho walked over and crouched down in front of him, and placed a hand on Jisung's shoulder, "Breath in and out okay? You are out of the class and now are in the empty hallway, no one else is here beside you and me." He says in the calmest tone, he never heard Minho speak to him like this and automatically this made Jisung follow his words. He breathed in and out, trying to let the anxiety flush from his mind, trying to tone down the quickened breathing and it worked. Once he felt like he was calmer he looked up at Minho through his lashes.

"Good job," He says, smiling a little. "Um, I'll go get your things, I'm sure you wouldn't want to go back into that class right? After all, we have..." Minho pulls out his phone from his front pocket to check the time, "Five minutes left of class, you can just leave early, are you okay with that?" Jisung nods, he doesn't want to go back there. Minho stands up and walks back into the class and Jisung lets out a sad sigh before standing up folding up his paper and shoving it in his front pocket. He walks towards the wall, presses his back against it before he slowly descends onto the smooth flooring, and looked blankly ahead. He fucked up big time, he hated himself for acting like a fool in front of the entire class, what do the students think of him now? What does the professor think? What does Minho think?

"You okay?" Minho says once he returns, Jisung quickly stands up and nods. "Alright then...so Professor Lim said that you are excused from this assignment, so there is no need to worry about having to present next time." Again, Jisung nods, and Minho hands him his backpack. "Where do you want to go?" He asks, and Jisung was taken aback by that. 

"W-What do you mean?"

"You know what I mean. Would you like to go anywhere in particular?" Minho says, raising a brow at him and he had the usual blank look again. "Or do you want to go alone? I'm fine with that."

"N-No!" Jisung replies a little too loudly and then he hangs his head in embarrassment, "Uh...I want to go back to my dorm."

"Okay follow me," Minho instructs. Jisung complied with his orders and followed behind Minho through the hallway, down the steps and out of the University building. He followed him till they were both in front of Minho's car and Jisung looked up at the other with wide eyes. Minho was willing to drop him off at his dorm this time? The last time Jisung was in his car, Minho was so pressed about it. 

"Just get in," Minho sighs and unlocks the car, "I'm sure you can't walk back to the dorms with that state you are in, we surely need to talk as well." Jisung only nodded as a response and sat down in the passenger seat. Minho took his place in the driver's seat and instead of starting the ignition he turned his body around and reached over to the seat in the back. He turned back around and outstretched his hand which he was holding a water bottle with, "Here drink up, hydration is important when you're stressed out or anxious, it will help you feel better." Jisung smiled at the other and grabbed the water bottle from him and unscrewed the plastic cap and starting drinking it. 

Minho pulled out of the University parking lot and started driving towards the dormitory building where Jisung's dorm was located in. The whole few minutes, Jisung was gazing out the window while playing with the partially empty bottle of water. Minho parked his car in the student housing parking and the two stepped out.

"Um, you're okay if I follow you into the dorms right?" Minho asks and Jisung nods, but he was slightly puzzled. He had never seen Minho act unsure around him like this, could it be that the brunette was pitying him now? Feeling bad for the humiliation Jisung had faced?

Jisung entered the passcode to his shared dorm room, let Minho step inside first, and then closed the door behind him. The blonde immediately walked over to his bed and plopped down on it and let out a giggle when he saw Minho was just standing there looking like he was wondering where to sit. "You can sit on Hyunjin's bed, I'm sure he wouldn't mind." Minho swiftly sat down on Hyunjin's bed and just stared right at the blonde. 

"Are you feeling better?" Minho asked in a calm and unhurried voice. 

"Yeah, thanks..." Jisung replies absently, he was quite surprised with Minho's sudden caring antics. 

"You got me worried there, Jisung. It looked like you were going to pass out." 

"I'm sure I wouldn't have lasted long there," Jisung humorlessly laughs. Minho smiles a little and looks around this dorm room.

"You really are a clutz, your side of this dorm is a mess," Minho comments with a dry cackle escaping his mouth. Here returned the jerk, "Do you not clean after yourself?" 

"I try to, but I just don't feel like cleaning," Jisung admits, his gaze never leaving Minho's big brown eyes, "Minho, may I ask you something?" Just by this one question, Minho's expression hardens and he gives the blonde a stern look. Nevermind, Jisung liked it better when Minho was calm, collected, and caring towards him.

"Yeah?" Minho's voice was just as cold and hard as his expression. 

"Is it possible for us to be..." Jisung pauses, unsure if he should say the word. Minho raised a brow at him seemingly wanting to know. "Friends?" All the bitterness and coldness disappeared from the older's face again and his expression now quipped to a humorous one.

"Sorry, I'm out of stock, I was limited edition," Minho smirked.

And before Jisung could respond to that comical statement, the beeping sound coming from the door's lock pulled the two from their conversation and in stepped a shocked Hyunjin. The black-haired male first glanced at Jisung giving him a baffled look, and then he peered over at the brunette and bowed. 

"Hello Minho Hyung, what brings you here?" Hyunjins asks politely.

"I think that is for Jisung to explain," Minho stands up and starts making his way towards the door, "I have to set up for the dance club that will start later today." Jisung saw how Hyunjin's confused expression vanished within a blink of an eye and it was replaced with an eager and excited look on his face.

"Dance club?!" He screeches, and Minho smiles.

"Yeah! Today is the first day of this dance club and it starts at 4:30 and ends at 6! I hope you can make it today! We meet every Tuesdays and Thursdays, more will be explained at the meeting today," Minho explained, his tone became much more elated and he was meeting with the same amount of excitement as Hyunjin who was literally bouncing at his spot. "See you there!" Minho says with a wide smile and Hyunjin steps aside letting the other reach the door and exit the dorm. Hyunjin immediately rushes to his bed and throws himself on it.

"A dance club?! My day has just gotten even better!!!" He squeals, the high pitched tone making Jisung flinch but the blonde chuckles afterward. Hyunjin was being so adorable and this time Jisung felt like the Hyung. Hyunjin quickly shifts so that he is sitting up and his legs were crisscrossed, he leans a little forward, "Jisung would you also like to come?"

"Ah, no, I don't think I should, plus I'm not much of a dancer, and you know...Minho doesn't like me...so yeah, you can go on your own or tell Felix about it, he will most likely be very happy to attend the first meeting," Jisung responds in a voice low and so uncertain. 

"I'm doubting the fact Minho's hates you honestly," Hyunjin pinpoints, his content expressed drops but not by that much, he looked much more relaxed. "What was he doing here anyway and what is there for you to explain?"

"In literature class, I had to do a presentation, I freaked out, ran out of class, Minho helped me calm down, drove me back here and yeah, that's all that happened basically," Jisung replies quickly. 

"Oh, I see," Hyunjin frowns, "The presentation must have made you super nervous, I'm very glad Minho helped you out" He sighs out, rubs his hand through his hair, and meets with the blonde's eyes again. "Anyways, back to my point, Minho does not hate you, if he does then why would he even bother helping you out?"

"Maybe out of pity?"

"If Minho hates you then why would he pity you?" Jisung couldn't counter that. Those words froze him from speaking and made him reconsider everything. Minho was acting oddly nice today, did his heart soften up now? Nah, Minho still probably hates him and is just messing with him. Maybe he just wants to make Jisung feel hopeful for a friendship but then stomps on him again and make him feel all miserable again and ashamed. 

"Exactly! See you know what I mean huh?" Hyunjin smiles. "So my little Sungie star, would you pretty please come with me to the dance club? Just for today yeah? If you don't end up liking it then you don't have to come ever again~so what ya say? Wanna come? Hm?" Hyunjin looked at Jisung with puppy-eyes and pouted.

And here they both were two hours later - walking towards the performing arts building, heading towards the direction where the dance practice rooms were. From a distance, Jisung could hear the hip-hop music blasting through the door and there was so much chattering going on behind that door. As they neared the door, Hyunjin gripped onto the handle of the half-opened door, which was propped open with a door stopper and pulled the door so that it was a little more open. Hyunjin stepped inside halfway, but Jisung remained standing there contemplating to himself about whether or not he should join. 

"Jisuuunnggg come on," Hyunjin whines, "You agreed to come here, and I even texted Felix about this club and told him you were going to come along too!" Yeah, Jisung did agree but that was because that pouty look Hyunjin gave him made his plan of saying no, fail. Having no choice he willingly followed Hyunjin inside and looked around. This club was pretty impacted, it had approximately twenty to thirty people and the majority of them were circled up watching two people in the middle dance battle, while the others were chatting with their friends. 

"Hyunjin! Jisung!" They heard a happy shrill, and in front of them came Felix running towards them with an excited look on his face, "You guys came!" 

"When is the club going to start?" Hyunjin asks.

"In five minutes, it's 4:25 right now," Felix replies then turns around and looks right at the other side of the practice room, Jisung and Hyunjin follow his gaze curiously, "Look at Minho he is such a dancing machine!" Jisung notices that Minho was in the center of the circle with someone about an inch or two shorter than him and they were dance battling, they both were really skilled. The two then stopped and the pale-skinned male leans in close to Minho's ear and whispers something before the two exit the circle and walks towards the other far corner of the practice room and they were discussing something, Jisung assumes that they must be the heads of the club.

Minutes later the sound of the music dies down, and everyone stopped what they were doing and looked at the front where Minho and the other guy were standing. Jisung's assumptions were right, Minho might be the head of this club. 

"Hello everyone, I'm glad you all were able to make it to our first meeting," Minho starts off first, putting on a small smile, "I am Lee Minho, a second-year student and the president of this club it's nice to meet you." He then turns to the male next to him.

"Hello, you can call me Ten, senior student, and I'm the president of this dance club, it's nice to meet all of you. I see some new faces here too," he laughs, "Welcome to this club! If you have any questions feel free to ask Minho or me, we will be happy to answer any questions."

A girl shot up her hand, "I have a question!" 

"Go ahead," Minho responds.

"Are you single?" She asks in a sweet voice, Ten snorts and turns his head to Minho who had on an amused look on his face.

"No, I'm an album," He answers and the girl flushes with slight embarrassment as her friends laughed at her and tried to cheer her up at the same time. "Any _other_ questions?"

The two presidents of this club scanned around the practice room trying to see if there were any hands raised, no one else was raising their hands. "Alright, since our Club secretaries aren't here, today will just be a chill day, you guys can get to know each other, dance and have fun, come find Minho or me if there is any questions or concerns." Ten states and Minho heads over to the stereo and turns on the music again making every one return to what they were originally doing earlier. Ten happily runs over to the circle again and Jisung sees how Minho walks over to the wall and just stands there staring blankly. 

"Bro let's go to that circle! I want to show them my Fortnite dance skills," Felix chants and starts running his way towards the pretty large circle where the students were watching in awe at the student doing backflips.

"I'll go with him, if you need anything I'll be there," Hyunjin gives the blonde an apologetic look and points at the circle. Jisung nods as a response and sulked once the black-haired male ran after Felix. Now Jisung was all alone and he felt completely awkward. What could he do now? He regrets coming here, he feels so out of place now - could there be a music production club? For sure he'd have lots of fun there. He juts out his bottom lip a little and looks up at the other side of the practice room - Minho was still standing there looking so down. Jisung wondered if he should approach him but decided against it. Disturbing Minho would be the last thing he'd do.

"Hey," He heard a deep voice nearby and Jisung blinked a couple of times before turning his head to the right and saw a silver-haired male standing next to him with a slight smile playing on his lips. He looked so handsome. "I'm Jeon Daekhwa, a third-year student. What is your name?"

"Han Jisung, first year," Jisung answers.

"Such a pretty name for a pretty person," Daekhwa chuckles, "You looked rather lonely, are you good?" Jisung nods. "Um, can you dance?" Jisung frowns and shakes his head.

"I can't dance that well honestly."

"Ah, don't fret too much about that, you'll get the hang of it once you try," Daekhwa outstretched his hand, "Come follow me, I'll teach you my favorite dance." Jisung smiles genuinely at the silver-haired male and held onto his hand and the male pulled him closer to the wall that was behind them. "Okay, I'll teach you slowly, step by step..."

Minho felt frustrated. He was undergoing weird spiteful feelings directed towards the silver-haired male. The smile Jisung gave the other male pained Minho in the heart, and Minho tensed his jaw at that thought. Why must he react this way and feel this way when he had been treating Jisung like trash for two-three weeks? He doesn't know anymore. Minho chews on his bottom lips, let's his arms fall to his side as he watches the two exchange a conversation with each other, and he clenches his fist when he sees the coin head outstretch his hand for Jisung who happily grabs onto the hand letting the other male pull him towards the wall across from Minho and they exchange a few more words -- What was his name again? Dickhwa? Douchehwa? Eunhwa? Minho only knew the 'hwa' syllable. _Whatever, not like I want to know that fucker's name._

The next thing he sees makes his blood boil. That coin head does a dance move slowly for the wacky blonde and it seems like he is trying to teach Jisung how to dance. Minho felt that he could teach _way_ better that that coin head - he was more experienced; Minho was in a dance class, wanting to make it his major, he was in the dance team (the best in the team) and he is one of the presidents in this dance club. In this case, seeing that silver coin head teach Jisung a move makes him let out a snort. _My cats Soonie, Doongie, and Dori can probably dance better than you and probably teach better._ His role as the president was to not dispirit anyone, instead, he had to encourage and motivate others, but as long as he was dispiriting that coin head in his mind, it couldn't hurt, right?

"Hey." Minho was popped out of his little world of anger when he sees the perspiring Ten stand right in front of him looking very concerned. "You don't look so good, are you okay?" He asks as he wipes away the sweat on his forehead with his shirt.

"Yeah, just thinking about what we could do for the meeting on Thursday," Minho lies pulling on a happy facade.

"Oh, great, let me know what you plan," Ten smiles, "I'll go back and watch them dance, I came here because you seemed distressed about something, I'll talk to you later," He waves before turning back around and walking over at the left side of the practice room where the students were gathered up; cheering and chanting at Hyunjin and Felix who were now the ones in the center. Minho tore his gaze away from them and returned his gaze towards the two near the wall across from him and he feels himself scowl again. Now the rascal had stopped teaching the blonde the dance and were currently laughing. _We'll see who laughs once I shave off all of that silver hair and sell it. I'll probably make fortunes._

Minho sighs and makes his way across the practice room, and stands a few feet away from them; distant enough so that they wouldn't notice but still close enough from him to hear what they were saying. He leans back against the wall, placing his right foot firmly on the wall and crosses his arms over his chest.

"What do you mean you can't dance? You did very well and learned the moves quickly! Good job Jisung!" Coin-head says happily. _Yeah, now go give him a treat, I'm sure Jisung would be delighted,_ Minho bitterly thinks to himself. 

"No, I'm not that good, I suck at dancing," The blonde replies and puffs out his cheeks. Seriously? _First of all, find a better teacher, maybe me. And second of all stop being so cute around him, he is going to swoon over you._

"You are so cute," Coin-head cooed. _And you are not_. Coin-head is definitely flirting much to Minho's dismay. He wants to confront the other male and let out his anger but he knows he shouldn't be in the picture. Technically none of what was going on in front of him was his business.

"No, I'm not _that_ cute," Jisung crosses his arms over his chest and continues with that cute pout. Is he trying to get that coin-head all over him? Because if he is it's working _pretty_ well. Minho rolls his eyes, he wants to throw up at the sight in front of him. He wants to bring his three beautiful cats and tell them to mess that coin-heads face. He has heart eyes while he is talking to blondie and for some reason, Minho feels a fire blazing in his chest.

"You are, Jisungie." _Jisungie?!_ Minho lets out an angry breath through his nose. As of now, he wants to hack off that coin head's head and sell it or feed it to a bear or something he doesn't know, but he wants that boy dead. He clenched his fists again as he watched the scene in front of him. They kept on talking and talking about random things that weren't much of Minho's interest. It's obvious that the coin-head was liking Jisung in _that_ way yet much to Minho's bliss, Jisung was just looking at that male in 'friendly terms' - Minho didn't know why that brought to much relief to his heart. 

"Jisung you are the most stunning person I've seen," the coin-head compliments the blonde, and Minho helplessly continued to stare at the two, and he notices Hyunjin and Felix walk towards the two. Perfect timing. "Your cheeks are so cute as well, can I poke them?"

"No!" Hyunjin steps in front of Jisung who widened his eyes in response. The coin-head didn't seem to like the interference; Minho tried to hold in his laugh but a sudden thought overtook his mind. If Hyunjin wouldn't let the coin head lay a finger on Jisung does that mean they are dating? There was no doubt that Hyunjin and Jisung could be dating they are so close. "Jisung's cheeks are valuable and the only person that's allowed to touch them is..." He turns around and pokes Jisung's cheek making him flush with embarrassment, "Me!"

"And who are you?" The silver-haired male crosses his arms over his chest and raises a brow. Hyunjin turns around and gives him a blank look; Minho could sense the tension between the two, it had only been a minute since they've 'met' and they already look like they completely dislike each other and want to tear each other down.

"Oh, my bad," Hyunjin says in a snide way, "I'm Hwang Hyunjin, Jisung's best friend." 

"And you?" The silver-haired male turns to Felix and smiles at him earnestly. _Ouch,_ Hyunjin looks pissed now _._

"I'm Lee Felix! I came from Australia," Felix says cheerfully. He is such a social butterfly. 

"Welcome to Seoul~" The coin-head outstretches his hand towards the Australian and the white-haired male happily grasps it and shakes it. "I'm Jeon Daekhwa, a third-year student, it's nice to meet you." Hyunjin stands there completely fuming and Minho felt bad for him, well, it was kind of Hyunjin's fault for being...rude in a way. He then looks over at Minho and smirks. _Huh? Why is he staring at me like that?_ Hyunjin steps away from Jisung and then leans into Felix's ear, whispering something and Felix gazed right at Minho and smiled cheekily, which made Minho realize that it was him Hyunjin was whispering about. 

"Jisung Hyung, let's go dance there!" Felix grasps onto Jisung's wrist and points towards the direction where there was a group of girls dancing to what seemed like choreography from Twice's song Cheer Up. Before Jisung could say anything he was dragged away by Felix, leaving Daekhwa and Hyunjin standing there awkwardly.

"Um, I'll go..." Daekhwa says flatly and Hyunjin narrows his eyes at him before nodding and waving goodbye, then gave him a look of disgust. The silver-haired male rolls his eyes at him and walks away heading towards the circle. Hyunjin abruptly turns to Minho and starts walking towards him. What exactly was he planning on talking about?

"Come outside," Hyunjin says, and heads towards the exit. Minho hesitantly followed right after him and left this sweat reeking stuffy practice room; delighted to meet with the cool hallway air. The two stood face to face, and Hyunjin let out a little sigh, "Minho can you quit with your facade?" Facade? Minho was utterly confused. "I saw you stare at Jisung and his new friend in a vicious way and I did not miss that moment when you literally walked across the practice room and was watching them with pure jealousy" Hyunjin definitely was smart and watchful like a wolf, but Minho wasn't understanding the point he was trying to make. 

"And?" Minho replies, confused. 

"You like Jisung," Hyunjin deadpans. Like Jisung? That was the funniest thing Minho had ever heard yet. He didn't like Jisung, he hates him with all his might, or at least that's what he was trying to tell himself. "I can read you like an open book, Lee Minho Hyung. I'm sure that you are pretending to hate him, I don't know why, but please stop. Not only is it hurting Jisung, but it's also hurting you." Minho's mouth formed an 'o' upon Hyunjin's explanation. He didn't intend to hurt Jisung too much, he only wanted to drive him away, but it wasn't working. 

"Be completely honest with your words," Hyunjin stares at him sternly making Minho freeze up, "Do you like Han Jisung." The feelings of jealousy when Jisung was around others, the feelings of concern towards him, and the feelings of contentment when Jisung all hit back at him like a train. Was Hyunjin right? 

"I don't know..." Minho mutters and scratches the back of his neck. 

"I'll take that as a yes," Hyunjin smirks.

"Wha-

"Well, I'll go back inside and," Hyunjin continues speaking cutting the dumfounded brunette off, "I don't like that Daekhwa guy not gonna lie." This is something Minho could agree with, but mostly because that guy was leeching onto Jisung. Hyunjin gives one last smile and before the black-haired male walked inside, leaving Minho out in the hallway. Minho nears the wall and sits down, staring down blankly at his hands. _Do I like Han Jisung?_

_Maybe._


	6. A chance

After closing off the dance practice room, Minho walked out of the performance arts building and headed straight towards his car wanting to get home as soon as possible to wash away the sweat that felt so sticky against his skin. When he arrived, he pressed in the five-digit pin code, and the lock beeped in approval. He opened the door, stepped inside his quiet apartment - it had always been like this ever since as he moved here for university. The only sounds in this place were the occasional soft, heart-warming mewls from his cats that brought in happiness to his lonely soul and the sounds of his footsteps as he walks around this peacefully quiet place.

He took off his shoes and walked towards the living room where the three of his cats were; Dori was sleeping, Soonie was staring right at him and Doongie was playing with a stuffed toy. He smiled fondly at them and then ambled to his bedroom to grab his bathrobe. 

_I can read you like an open book, Lee Minho Hyung. I'm sure that you are pretending to hate him,_ Hyunjin's statement repeated in his mind as he approached his rather spacious bathroom; he stepped inside, the soles of his feet touched the cool white colored marble tiles, sending shivers down his spine. Minho couldn't help but feel that he was pretending to hate Jisung. Hyunjin was right about it being a 'facade.' It was a way for him to drift away from those feelings, it was a bad way. Whenever he was acting aloof around Jisung, it stung his pounding heart to act the way he did - Minho felt like a rotten human being for that. He clearly hurt Jisung and scared him off in a way, and Minho felt so horrible about himself. He treated Jisung like shit, yet the blonde had still asked if it was possible to be friends and still was nice to Minho. Jisung is nothing else but a rainbow that appeared after the harsh gloomy rainy weather. 

Letting out a sigh of melancholy, Minho stripped himself from the sweaty, noxious smelling clothes that he danced in and walked over to the glass walk-in shower and turned on the water to warm. In an instant, the warm water fell onto him drenching him. The first day of University, when he crashed into Jisung and landed on top of him he felt his heartbeat quicken as he stared at Jisung's undeniably beautiful face - in his opinion Jisung was the most beautiful person he had seen so far, and that's when he started having _those_ feelings arise in him. And it wasn't only Jisung's look that allured him, it was also because Minho later discovered that the blonde had such a one of a kind personality, a personality Minho was attracted to, Jisung was so true to himself. Minho thought that the feelings were just a one-time thing, but once he encountered Jisung in the bathroom he could confirm that it wasn't a one-time thing. He would occasionally steal glances at the blonde whenever he saw him - he couldn't stop himself, it was as if a rope was tied around him, dragging him towards the blonde.

Minho turned off the water, grabbed his mint blue-colored bathrobe - liking the softness against his fingertips, and slipped it on, then wrapped the robe around him before tying the tie - securing his robe in place. Exiting the bathroom he headed straight towards his kitchen and prepared himself some tea. He pours it in his mug and walks over to his living room couch. He notices that Soonie is sleeping on the couch now, so he placed himself next to Soonie and placed his mug on the coffee table in front of him. The thoughts about Jisung weren't leaving his mind much to his sadness. How could he let go of this attraction? Jisung obviously didn't feel the same. He grabbed his mug again, took a few sips of the hot pungent liquid. He needed to talk to Chan about it, maybe he'd understand. 

And Minho still wanted to figure out what he said in his freaking dream that one day he used Jisung as a mattress - how embarrassing. He wondered how he managed to have a goodnight's sleep on top of a slim person and how did he not crush that blonde? If he figures out that Jisung's bones are made of steel he wouldn't even be surprised. 

Minho found Chan's name in his contacts and brought his phone to his ear. After a few seconds, the other picked up saying a groggy, "Hello?" Minho must have awoken him from his sleep or something, _does_ Chan even sleep? 

"Hey, um, can I ask you something?" Minho asks, hoping that he wasn't bothering the blonde-haired male in any way.

"Yeah, of course," Chan replies sweetly, "What is it?"

"If I'm being very mean to someone, but kind of like them-"

"I knew it!" Chan shouts happily, cutting Minho off, "It's about Jisung isn't it huh?"

"Yeah..." Minho replies, feeling completely embarrassed. 

"Don't do what you are doing to him. Don't be so mean to him, and just be your true kind and soft-hearted self. Why do you have to hide your feelings of _love_ with pure dislike? Poor Jisungie has to suffer thinking that you hate him," Chan says in a sort of stern way, "Don't pretend to be someone you're not Minho, be yourself, okay? If you continue to behave the same way towards Jisung, the freshman might end up acting the same towards you as well."

"Okay," Minho simply replies, "I'll _try_ to be nice..." 

"That's the spirit, now go reconcile with Jisung," Chan cheers, "I have to finish my project, goodnight!" 

"Night." Minho turns off his phone, finished the rest of his tea, and placed it in the kitchen sink; too lazy to wash that one and only dish that needed to be washed. All he wanted to do was sleep out his empty feelings. 

Why had he tried to keep his true feelings pressed inside? Minho didn't know why he tried to diminish those feelings by faking hate. Could it be his insecurities about something? He lets out a sigh, and pulls his comforter over his face; he didn't want to think about it too much. 

\--------

As usual health class went by quickly since the professor was very enthusiastic and always made the boring repetitive lessons seem interesting. After getting that okayish class over with, Jisung walked through the halls and finally reached the large noisy cafeteria. However, a warm sweaty hand wrapping tightly around his arm made him pause from his steps. Who was it to hold onto him like this? This is weird for him. He rolled his head to the side and his expression dropped a little when he saw that it was Minho - his long fringe partially wet and sweat was streaming down his face; Minho must've come from his dance class. There was something new about this encounter, Minho looked sickly and very exhausted.

"What?" Jisung glanced down at his arm that was being held onto and then looked back up at the older, trying to non-verbally ask the other why he was holding onto his arm like that. Minho is out of his mind or something, usually, Minho would avoid Jisung like he was some sort of poisonous pissed off snake. 

Minho didn't say anything in response - with his strong pull he dragged Jisung away from the entrance. "Hey! Minho! Where are you taking me?!" Jisung tried to wrench away from the painful grasp on him, but it wasn't working; Minho is strongly built. His question was answered when the brunette dragged him towards the bathroom door. He swiftly opened it, pushed Jisung in, then he stepped in and closed the door. Jisung was growing perturbed with this situation - he was in the fucking bathroom, with Minho; Jisung felt that he needed to prepare for the new round of insults or maybe another punch or two to his gut.

"I'm sorry," Minho sighs out, bites onto his bottom lip, and lowers his head - staring down at the smooth flooring that reflected the bathroom lights, he presumably looked guilty about something. 

Jisung was taken aback. Minho was _apologizing_? Not only was it shocking but it made him question whether the person in front of him was actually Minho or not.

"For what?" Jisung asked, attentively gazing at the older. Minho's head snaps up, and agony was displayed deep in those chocolate brown orbs.

"For everything, Jisung," Minho replies, staring hard at the blonde, "Everything that I've done to you these past two weeks. It was very impulsive of me to treat you like shit for no reason. I'm sorry for hurting you and making you uncomfortable around me, I promise you that I won't harm you in any way anymore." A flower of hope had bloomed in Jisung's heart; lifting up the tension and replacing it with bliss. A friendship with him could be possible, Minho seemed so sincere with his words. His eyes and genuine tone had said it all.

"It's okay Minho Hyung," Jisung smiles. Minho cracks a tiny smile on his soft pink lips - he was so different from how he previously was; all of his snideness seemed to have escaped him and now in front of him was a Minho that his friends had described as nice. Jisung decided that now was definitely the best time to ask if they could start fresh and be friends. He outstretched his hand, his smile not leaving his lips - "Let's be friends." Minho's smile dropped, and he glanced down at Jisung's hand and then looked back up at Jisung. The blonde waited for a response - rejection or acceptance; low-key hoping that Minho would accept. Being friends wasn't too much to ask for...right?

The response he gets next makes him feel a tad bit of hurt in his heart - Minho suddenly looked very paled and his eyebrows knitted together, making Jisung regret even saying the word 'friends.' The brunette swiftly turned around and left the bathroom. Jisung let his arm fall to his side, and he let out a sad sigh. Friends? Never. Jisung knew he should have expected this. 

After about a few minutes of mentally scolding himself for acting like a fool, he walked out of the bathroom and dragged himself to the cafeteria. The first person his eyes landed on once he had located the table his friends were seated at was Hyunjin, and the black-haired male was looking right at him with a smile so bright that it sent a meager amount of happiness through Jisung's bloodstream. Hyunjin was the bright light that was present whenever Jisung felt down and stuck into a deep dark hole; never once had Hyunjin left his side in the darkest times. 

"You okay?" Hyunjin asks when Jisung sits at an empty chair across from Hyunjin. Jisung simply nods as a response. Jisung wasn't too okay, but offering Hyunjin not so real assurance was his top priority right now; he shouldn't make a happy Hyunjin sad. Bringing in worry to Hyunjin was like hitting him with stones - affecting him. He didn't want to bring that burden upon Hyunjin. Jisung knew he needed to be more independent, he wasn't a little kid.

Jisung was popped out of his thoughts when Hyunjin suddenly got up and leaned over the table shortening the distance between their faces. The black-haired male narrows his eyes at the blonde as if he was looking deep into his soul trying to unlock his true emotions. "Did the class go badly?" He asks. It did but Jisung shakes his head anyways. Hyunjin purses his lips.

"Jisung look's completely fine Hyunjin Hyung," Jeongin mutters out, and Hyunjin retracted back into his chair and sighs a little before smiling. Jisung could recognize something odd in the tone of Jeongin's voice but just brushed it off as him feeling irritated or tired, usually, the younger would be cheerful and sprinkled around his energy with a big smile, but Jisung assumes today is supposedly different for Jeongin - not everyone could feel the same way _every_ single day. 

"By the way," Chan clears his throat pulling the three from their small awkward conversation; they looked right at him, "Where is Minho?" _Right,_ Jisung thought to himself as he recalled how Minho left him hanging in the bathroom.

"I don't know why Minho isn't here right now," Hyunjin sighs, and then his facial expression drops to the one of gloom, "But in dance class, he was being an idiot. He slipped and hit his head on the floor, but immediately stood right back up and continued dancing as if nothing had happened!" Hyunjin's voice elevated to a more exasperated tone, "The dance teacher told him to rest but he said he was fine." 

"Wait, what?!" Chan shouts out, widening his eyes at this information, then he narrows his eyes and frowns in disappointment, "I know he loves dancing and all, but he really needs to start taking care of himself. I'll scold that bastard when I see him."

"Please do," Felix sighs, "And convince him to take it all easy."

"And tell him to see a doctor," Changbin chimes in, "How bad did he hit his head?"

"How bad is a 'thud'?" Hyunjin raises a brow, seemingly knowing how to answer but just wanted to prove his point. A thud sounded bad, not as bad as a crash, but still bad enough for it to be a little concerning for Jisung. _Aha! So that is why Minho was acting so nice, the floor knocked him to his senses._ Okay, that was a harsh thought and Jisung felt some shame coat his mind _._

"Oh god," Seungmin comments, "Let's keep an eye on him or something. He might have injured his head badly." They all nod in unison. 

Worry began tugging its way into Jisung's stomach upon imagining Minho's fall. Was Minho really okay? Did he break his skull? Jisung just wanted to smack himself in the face - he wasn't too fond of Minho to worry about him. Why should he even bother worrying? Minho clearly didn't care about him. Why _did_ he want Minho to care about him? Minho probably only apologized out of pity because Jisung suffered so much embarrassment in a span of _two_ fucking weeks.

\--------

After the dull and boring final class of the day had come to an end, Jisung quickly made his way out of the University building and headed straight back to his dorm wanting to do nothing else but whine to Hyunjin about how this final class went for him - so fucking boring. The class almost sucked his life out of him and he was left with exhaustion to his poor brain. He finally had reached the front of his dormitory door, expecting Hyunjin to be in here laying on his bed. He pressed in the code to the lock and opened the door.

What he saw on _his_ bed was not Hyunjin, it was freaking Minho. Jisung rubbed his eyes, maybe his brain he believed that was completely drained was trying to play tricks on him or something. Removing his hands from his eyes, he blinked several times and came back to his senses when he heard snickering and he shot his gaze back at Minho again - still there. 

"What are you doing here?" 

"I'm surprised that is the question you'd ask," Minho utters back and shifted a little so that he was directly facing the blonde. "I was expecting a 'how did you get in here?'" Jisung scrunched his forehead at what Minho had just babbled out, seemingly speaking his mind. They stared at each other for what seemed like several dreadful seconds, and Jisung knew he needed to speak up and clear up the awkwardness that he could feel leaping around in the air. 

"Okay, how did you get here?" 

"Um, I remembered which floor you lived on and the room number from yesterday, and yeah, I knocked, Hyunjin opened the door and I asked him if I could talk to you he said yeah, and that he was going to leave anyway to hang out with Jeongin, and here I was, waiting for you to arrive," Minho blatantly explains.

"Oh, okay," Jisung replies. He had never ever met someone so confusing like Minho in his life. There is one moment Minho acts like the biggest jerk in the world, and then there he is right now sitting right on his messy bed, looking at him with a now prideful smile right on his beautiful face. In that beauty was a mystery that Jisung still had yet had to undercover. 

"Hyunjin told us what happened to you during dance class," Jisung says, the concern now dominating his voice, "Are you okay?" Minho's smile grows wider and he nods. 

"I'm flattered that you care," Minho replies, the row of his white teeth showing as his lips were still tugged upwards, Jisung's felt blood rush to his cheeks and he swallowed dryly. "And yeah, I'm more than okay."

"That's good to hear," Jisung sighs and made his way towards Hyunjin's bed and plops down comfortably. He was beginning to feel comfortable underneath Minho's presence - could it be too early to feel this way? Would Minho whiplash and react badly again?

"You know how you asked if we could be friends?" Minho points out, ostensibly trying to continue having a conversation, and Jisung quietly nods as a response. He asked twice and got rejected the first time, but the second time, he wasn't sure, Minho just silently left the bathroom but Jisung could take that as another rejection. "Let's get to know each other better." Jisung widened his eyes and his mouth parted, not believing what his ears had just picked up.

"W-What?" 

"Let's be friends," Minho confirms. "That's the reason why I came here, I wanted to accept being friends with you. Sorry for leaving you like that in the bathroom, I had to..." Minho trails off, and looks down at his legs, he looked unsure about what to say and Jisung could tell Minho was trying to hide something. " _Ugh_. I had to find someplace else to vomit in." He admits. Jisung's eyebrows scrunch together in worry. The sickly expression on Minho's face earlier today did not lie. 

"You really aren't okay."

"I am now," Minho sighs and looks back up, "Anyway, let's get to know each other better." Jisung pushed away his concerns and nods at the sudden topic change, if Minho didn't want to talk about it then it was all fine, Jisung didn't want to pester him too much. "What is your favorite food?" 

"Uh, I'd say Cheesecake," Jisung replies.

"So sweet~" 

"Huh?"

"The cheesecake, idiot," Minho laughs, "My favorite food is ramen." The flowers inside Jisung had burst from the overload of happiness. It would take some time to completely trust in Minho's sudden shift in actions towards Jisung, but the blonde wanted to at least give him a chance - the brunette's laughter, smile, gaze and words seemed genuine enough to make Jisung's heart scream at him to have trust in this newfound friendship he had desired for so long. 

"What's your favorite season?" Jisung asks after a brief silence between the two; hoping that this question wasn't too boring. Minho purses his lips, thinking about an answer.

"I'd say fall, the surroundings during that season is so beautiful, especially when there are different warm colors of leaves scattered around. It's all comforting honestly," Minho chuckles, "It's will be months before the season approaches again." There were still a few months to go since it was spring right now. To Jisung Minho did seem much more like a person who favors fall, especially with his warm features. "What season do you like?" 

"Winter," Jisung replies, "It feels nice to wear warm layers of clothes and snuggle in soft blankets. It comforts me in a way."

"You're such a softie," Minho chuckles and Jisung blushes a little. And the next bunches of minutes were just fille with them talking casually. They got to know each other a little better, even if basic questions were asked. It still was fun to hear why Minho liked the things he liked or hear what his passions and interests were. The talk they had made Jisung feel that Minho isn't a cruel person after all; yet there is still so much he needed to learn about him.

\--------

Jeongin and Hyunjin stepped out of a boba tea place and were now walking side by side through the sidewalk. It was filled with a menacing silence, and Hyunjin felt like he was dying on the inside, he was so nervous and couldn't manage the intensifying feeling. How could he feel so calm if right next to him was his crush? Their hang out at the boba place was pretty nice, they talked about random things and classes, and Hyunjin had to try his best to keep his feelings hidden. 

"I'm hungry," Jeongin says and pats his stomach to prove his point.

"Me too," Hyunjin replies and pouts a little, Jeongin lightly laughs at that. "Where do you want to eat?"

"Um," Jeongin looks around and then points directly at a pizza place located across the street on their left. "There." Hyunjin nods and smiles as a response and the two walked through the crosswalk and headed into the building. When they stepped inside, they were met with the smell of pizza and Hyunjin's stomach let out a little growl. They both ordered a large-sized cheese pizza, and coke before making their way to an empty table and sat across from each other. Hyunjin could feel his heart accelerate just by looking at Jeongin's face which displayed a look of joy.

"You're so pretty," Jeongin comments, making Hyunjin swallow nervously. "The mole under your eye makes your face look even prettier."

"T-Thank you," Hyunjin smiles, "You're good looking as well, you look so cute." Jeongin giggled at that. _Stop with the giggling it's making my heart go insane._

"Cute," Jeongin laughs out, "You're so cute when you're shy." 

Hyunjin wasn't going to last long, especially due to Jeongin being so sweet to him.

Hanging out with Jeongin was something memorable for Hyunjin even when he felt completely flustered and shy. Each smile Jeongin formed on his silky pink cushiony lips had made Hyunjin's heart race and tingle with so much joy. Jeongin's angelic giggles were like music to his ears, heck he would one day record it if he could and listen to it whenever he was upset. Jeongin's laugh never had failed to make Hyunjin's lips twitch and as much as he wanted to hold in his smile and try to hide his feelings, his lips betrayed him and curled up. 

"Hyunjin Hyung," Jeongin mutters, looking up at Hyunjin. Hyunjin tries to hold back another smile when he notices the sparkles in those deep dark brown orbs. 

"Hm?" Hyunjin softly hums. Jeongin bits onto his bottom lip seemingly hesitant about what he should say. The younger opened his mouth, and then closed it again, and right on his pale skin was redness that was settling on his cheeks. Instantly Jeongin looks away and takes a deep inhale. Hyunjin didn't want to urge him to say something and patiently waited for Jeongin to speak; after all the younger was so soft-hearted and shy, he was like a Jisung in a way, but at the same time much more bashful compared to the blonde who would occasionally have confidence filled outbursts. 

"Hyunjin Hyung," Jeongin starts again, his voice so soft, "I think I like you."

"I think I like you too," Hyunjin replies unsure of what 'like' the younger had ment. Did he like him as a person? As a friend? Or like him in a romantic way? He was pushed out of his doubts when Jeongin's fingers laced around his thin wrist and he dragged him in the dark space between two buildings, barely lit by the sun.

"I like you _that_ way," Jeongin continues gently nudging Hyunjin towards the wall and the black-haired male's heart began to pound up against his rib cage as the younger was getting dead close to his body. 

"W-What way?" Hyunjin barely managed to breathe out, he knew what it ment yet the doubt still tightened around his brain. Jeongin's smile retraced onto his lips, and he stepped even closer, pressed his torso against Hyunjin's, and tilted his face upwards so that his lips were ghosting against Hyunjin's. Hyunjin could feel Jeongin's warm breath caress his parted lips.

"The first day of University, when I came to your table to talk to Jisung Hyung, I noticed you look right at me with such fondness it touched me in the heart. It seemed like you were interested in me, and I couldn't help but feel so warm on the inside with that thought, but I wasn't so sure if it was just a friendly gaze or not, but I still felt attracted to you," Jeongin confesses, each breath he let out tickled against Hyunjin's lips. He then traces Hyunjin's jawline soothingly with his pointer finger, "You are so beautiful, so so so beautiful. And your act of kindness towards others managed to swoop me from my feet and that's when I told myself that Hwang Hyunjin himself, from head to toe, is my ideal type. I like you." At this point Hyunjin was beet red from Jeongin's confession. _He likes me! Oh my god! What do I do?! My heart is beating so fast, can he hear it?_

Hyunjin opened his mouth to say something but was stopped when Jeongin's soft pair of lips attached themselves against Hyunjin's plump ones and Jeongin's fingers trailed their way down to Hyunjin's body and with both hands he firmly gripped onto Hyujin's hips - trying to press their bodies impossibly closer. The thought of Jeongin being the dominant one makes Hyunjin feel his face heat up even more, at this point his cheeks could be steaming. After a minute of having their lips dance around each other pleasantly, Jeongin parted from him, the only thing that connected them together was the string of saliva which eventually broke. 

"Your lips feel so good," Jeongin breathes out, "So soft." He leans into Hyunjin's neck, lightly licks the smooth skin before lazily pressing his lips on the pale skin. He then takes the skin between his teeth teasingly, biting it gently making Hyunjin let out a light whimper. What once was a soft, shy boy turned out to be someone so seductive and captured Hyunjin's mind and heart.

"Will you be my boyfriend?" Jeongin asks as pulls away from Hyunjin's neck and gazes up at him again with those sparkle eyes. _Hell yes!_ \- Hyunjin would love to be his boyfriend, he wants to be all _his_. The black-haired male returned the smile and nodded happily to which Jeongin smiles even wider and pecks Hyunjin's plump lips. "Then can you do me one favor Hyunjinnie Hyung?" Hyunjin blinks at him curiously.

"Anything," Hyunjin says assuringly, "Anything for you Jeongin-ah." Jeongin smiles, obviously satisfied with Hyunjin's answer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about another slow update, it took me a long time to write this chapter out since I injured my head stupidly, and gave myself a concussion, which I worsened when I facepalmed myself lol. I couldn't focus on the screen light without squinting and having a headache, but still pushed through it because I can't stay away from writing, it's something I love doing and helps pass by the dragging time. At least the injury gave me an idea :P 
> 
> Anyways I hoped you enjoyed this soft chapter!
> 
> Hmm, what favor did Jeongin ask for? :o....


	7. Sliced heart

Jisung had awoken from his dream that he had already forgotten about and stirs to his side hoping to go back to sleep but he couldn't anymore. Apart of him wanted to get out of his bed and start his day, but another part of him was begging for him to remain still in the comfortableness of his warm blanket and plushy mattress; he just wanted to stay in the soothing warmth forever. It felt like it was the happiness that played the role in waking him up early today, early enough to see that Hyunjin was still fast asleep on his bed, his face was turned Jisung's way and his mouth was slightly agape. He looked so pure and peaceful in his sleep. Did their last night hang out go well? Remembering about Minho's visit yesterday, Jisung's lips curled up into a smile; he had obtained the possible - being Minho's friend. He forced away from his blanket, and moved to sit against the edge of his bed, he tilted his head side to side, trying to crack his neck and he reached for his phone checking the time - 7:30 AM. 

He gets out of his bed and walked over to his closet, feeling the need to wear something comfortable today. He pulled off his shirt and replaced it with a white shirt, and tugged on his tattered blue jeans, the fabric slightly cold against his skin. 

"You're up early today," He hears Hyunjin's say and then yawns afterward. The older shifted in his bed, making the blonde spin around and gaze at him and smile. 

"Yeah, surprising isn't it?" Jisung laughs, Hyunjin only cracks a small smile and he stretches out his arm, letting out a soft groan before lazily getting out of bed. He headed towards his closet, opened the door, and began sifting through his clothes seemingly trying to find something nice to wear. This is probably why Hyunjin often woke up earlier than Jisung - to spend time finding something good enough to wear. 

"Guess what happened between Jeongin and me yesterday~," Hyunjin says in a cutesy manner, Jisung for a moment began to ponder to himself. Could they be dating right now? That tone in Hyunjin's voice and the look of cheerfulness made it all click in his head - Hyunjin and Jeongin are probably dating. 

"You and Jeongin are now dating?" Jisung questions and Hyunjin nods as a response. 

" _Finally,"_ Jisung sighs out, "It was so painful watching you droll over Jeongin." Hyunjin only laughs as a response as he pulls on his light pink long-sleeved shirt, tucking it into his black skinny jeans. And this is when Jisung notices something odd about Hyunjin, he isn't talking that much. Jisung expected Hyunjin to say a million things about his hangout with Jeongin yesterday, he was the type to do that. Why was he so quiet about it? And why was he talking less than usual? Hyunjin's usual morning energy seemed non-existent today. 

"Minho came by to talk to you yesterday, how did it go?" Hyunjin asked as he clasped on a waist chain onto the belt loop located on his left side.

"We are friends now, I guess he doesn't hate me _that_ much," Jisung shrugs and grabs his backpack. Hyunjin finished dressing and puts on his backpack, and headed straight towards the door. He held it open so that Jisung could exit first, and then closed the door. The two walked together towards University as usual. The walk was silent, Jisung didn't mind it all that much but sometimes morning talks helped with kicking in the early joy he desperately needed. The silence had become so menacing somehow, but once they reached the loud cafeteria his feelings of awkwardness all boiled away. Of course, Hyunjin latched himself onto Jeongin, who wrapped his arms around Hyunjin lovingly and Jisung this time sat down next to Felix who was talking a storm with Changbin. Jisung pressed his elbow onto the smooth, cold surface of the table and rested his cheek on his fist. 

"Go get a room," Seungmin complains as he notices Jeongin press a kiss onto Hyunjin's cheek who only turns red when he notices Seungmin glaring at them. Jisung laughs at the shy look present on Hyunjin's face. 

" _Oh_ , they are a couple now," Chan says with a cheeky smile. "When did you two start dating?"

"Yesterday," Jeongin smiles.

Right after breakfast, Jisung headed towards his Art class alone, he knows he shouldn't be worried about his English class today, but still couldn't help but let the fear pounce inside his empty stomach. The last time he was there, he humiliated himself and he couldn't bear to face that class again. Maybe he could sit with Minho this time? Minho might make him feel comfortable, especially since he helped him out that day and they were now on good terms; thank goodness. 

His Art class went okay today, he bettered his skills in drawing and could probably sketch a decent portrait of Hyunjin, decent enough that it wouldn't look so deformed. His biology class was pure hell, not that it could be worse than his upcoming literature class, but the amounts of work the boring-ass biology professor would give the class made Jisung want to drop this class, not that he could, this was an important required class for a first-year student. 

Right when he reached the cafeteria, he reached the usual long line and waited. He paid for his three samsaek sandwiches and approached the lunch table where his friends were seated at. He sat down beside Seungmin who was desperately working on his calculus homework. He was speeding through his homework effortlessly and was working on the equations flawlessly, Jisung wished he was Seungmin, the younger was so talented with schoolwork.

"Oh look at Seungmin rushing to finish his work, the genius didn't do his math homework at home," Hyunjin cackles. The younger let's out a little huff, finished his last calculus problem, and slammed his workbook close, and glared at the black-haired male.

"At least I do my homework," Seungmin snaps back, "And it's not my fault that I have homework for almost every single class. I'm sure you and your roommate Jisung don't do your work at all and just waste your time doing other things." Jisung did not miss that way Hyunjin tensed up at Seungmin's words and Hyunjin quickly glanced to his side where Jeongin was sitting and then looked back at Seungmin. Hyunjin looked completely flustered like he was afraid of something, and that reaction made Jisung worried but curious at the same time. 

"What do you mean other things?!" Hyunjin playfully shouts, but there was some nervousness in his voice. "I always do my homework and give myself some deserving free time whenever needed." _Weird_ , Jisung thinks, what was Hyunjin so worked up about?

" _Yeah, yeah_ ," Seungmin replies and stuffs his workbook into his backpack. "Whatever you say." 

"I'm saying the truth," Hyunjin whines.

"I was kidding," Seungmin laughs, "Why are you getting so defensive all of a sudden?"

For some reason Jisung had a weird feeling that they were missing someone at this table, who could it be? He glances over at Felix and he was happily talking to Changbin about something related to rap, then he peers at Chan and he was just reading manga as he snacked on some chips. The missing face was Minho; Jising frowns at that thought, he wanted to talk to him more and develop their scarce friendship, but Minho wasn't present for lunch and this was making Jisung a little upset. Maybe he would be here for the literature class? He has to be there.

Minho didn't show up to literature class either, and Jisung felt some loneliness poke at his head, Minho was the only person he knew in this class and he planned on sitting with his newfound friend. What was keeping him from showing up to class? Jisung pushes away those thoughts and decided to just focus more on the lesson. 

The class dragged by boringly, the professor talked about literary devices of poetry and how sometimes deep within the unique and mysterious tones of the writing were meanings created by the writer. When the class came to an end, he packed up, and just as he was about to leave the professor stopped him from his actions by calling out his name. He had no other choice but to turn to the professor. 

"Are you okay?" Professor Lim asked, and Jisung nodded his head. The professor let out a little sigh his gaze not wavering from Jisung's eyes. The professor seemingly knew that Jisung was lying right through his teeth. How could he be okay after that day? It keeps on lurking in his mind - haunting him. "You seem to be afraid of public speaking, after what happened last class. I don't want to jump into conclusions and all, but by any chance do you have social anxiety?" _Social anxiety?_ Jisung didn't think so, he happily talked to his friends, excitedly meets new people, but when it comes to being the center of attention in front of several people he felt like he was decaying in front of their attentive stares. Maybe he didn't have social anxiety? With doubt, Jisung shook his head. He wasn't too sure.

"Ah okay then." The professor narrows his eyes at him a little, it appeared as if he was trying to observe Jisung's facial expression, and because of that, Jisung tried to look the calmest he could be. "Talk to me whenever you feel uncomfortable about something, okay? I want you to have the best experiences in this class and not feel upset. Feel free to drop by my office hours if you have any questions and concerns," He smiles at the blonde. Jisung thanked him before heading out of the class.

Just as he exited the building Jisung spotted Hyunjin and Jeongin walking past the school gates together and Jisung smiles and picked up his pace so that he was jogging towards them, when he was close enough he slung an arm around Hyunjin's shoulder making him yelp in surprise.

"Jisung-ah, you scared me!" Hyunjin complained and pouted. "And can you please let go of me?" Jisung sighs a little and removes his arm from Hyunjin's shoulder. He then glanced at Jeongin who was giving him this weird look, there was a little glint of something in his eye but Jisung couldn't make it out, could it be irritation? 

The younger pulls his eyes from Jisung and instead, stared at Hyunjin's face and locked his fingers with Hyunjins slim pretty fingers and smiles at him with so much love in his eyes, _way_ too much love and it was making Jisung feel so awkward. As much as he loved the fact that Hyunjin is dating someone so sweet like Jeongin, the amounts of love they were giving each other were making Jisung feel like a pathetic third wheel - and it seemed like the two didn't want Jisung here. 

"I, uh, will leave first," Jisung says. They didn't say anything and he walks away. When he reached his dorm, he places his backpack beside his desk chair and throws himself onto the bed. He squeezes his face into his pillow and breathes in deeply taking in the coconut smell coming from the fabric. The smell reminded him of his shampoo, which reminded him of the shower, and with so much effort he pulls himself away from his bed and heads to the bathroom to take a shower. When he was done, he left the bathroom and spotted Hyunjin on his bed texting on his phone with a huge smile plastered on his face. He was most likely texting Jeongin, who else could make Hyunjin smile so beautifully like that?

Jisung made his way over to Hyunjin's bed, wanting to talk to him. The older looked up from his phone, his smile faltered a little. "Yes?" _Ouch_. Jisung felt a slight pang to his heart and he stood there stupidly; Hyunjin didn't seem like he wanted to talk to Jisung right now so Jisung decided to do what was right for the current situation. Not wanting to bother him anymore, he decided to throw himself back at his bed again and press his face onto the pillow hoping that the small hint of sadness could be eaten up by the pillow or something. 

"What's wrong Jisung?" Jisung lifts his face from his pillow and turned his head to the right, looking at Hyunjin who gave him an empty stare. "You don't look so well."

"I'm fine Hyung," Jisung replies and places his face back onto his pillow dejectedly.

"Oh, okay then," Hyunjin replies, something in his tone was so different but Jisung couldn't conclude what it was. He was acting weird around him all day today, maybe having a boyfriend changed him a little? It could be a good thing. Jeongin seemed to care a lot about Hyunjin, their relationship was like cotton candy, so fluffy and sweet, it was perfect. 

Soon it was almost four, and Jisung was still laying down in his bed as he was scrolling through his youtube feed trying to find something interesting to watch. Hyunjin was still texting away on his phone so joyfully and occasionally Jisung would hear his soft giggles. Today is a Thursday, meaning that is is the second day of the afterschool dance club. After that Tuesday, the first meeting of the club; Jisung had decided not to attend this club anymore, it didn't fit his tastes; he was a horrible dancer and felt so weird being in a place that didn't interest him much. However, today was going to be an exception, he was just going to stop by for a bit to see if Minho would be there and if he is, he'd ask him if he was okay and then leave - simple.

Therefore, when it came time, he followed Hyunjin towards their university and stepped into the performing arts building. They walked through the hallway quietly, it felt as if he and Hyunjin were back to their first week of friendship - awkward and not knowing what to talk to each other about. It was getting unbearable, but Jisung tried his best to suck it up, Hyunjin might not be in the mood to talk to him. 

Jisung was meet with the familiar blare of music as he nears the half-open door, the sounds of the hip-hop music vibrated against the door and he could hear some faint chattering coming from the practice room. Hyunjin grips onto the door handle and further pulls the door open and steps inside, Jisung trails behind him. He presses his back against the wall and immediately began scanning around for Minho, he looked at the large circle trying to find the familiar body of Minho's - he wasn't there. He then looks at the front, he wasn't there either. And then to the right side, not there. Jisung frowns. Minho should be here early, after all, he was the president, doesn't he come early to set up?

When the time hit 4:30, the loud music was turned off by Ten and everyone stopped what they were doing just to focus on him. By his side were two other people, could they be the secretaries that weren't present the other day? 

"Hello!" Ten starts, smiling vibrantly, "I'm glad to see you all here for the second day of this club! I have good news and some bad news to share." Jisung's heart drops at that, could Minho be the bad news? Did something really bad happen to him? "First the good news, we finally have our two secretaries here, you may introduce yourselves."

"Hey everyone~I'm Yunho! This is my second year here at this University and I'm very delighted to meet you all," The tall one with puppy-like features and dark brown hair speaks and then he turns to the male next to him who had on a poker-faced expression.

"Hi, I'm Mingi," The one with the red hair says, "Also second year." He gives everyone a small smile before quickly averting his gaze towards Ten. 

"Okay," Ten sighs, "The bad news is that Minho isn't going to be here today, but he planned a fun activity for us," Ten smiles again, "The activity is that I will pick out a song for you guys, and it will be played on repeat for an hour, and in that hour you and your chosen partner will create your choreography and when the time is up you will perform what you came up with." Jisung shivers at the word 'perform,' he wasn't going to do such a thing. "You may now get started." Ten walked towards the stereo again and grabs his phone that was on top of it and put on a different hip-hop song. Jisung decides that it is now the perfect time to leave, and he turns towards the door and exits the noisy practice carrying along his feelings of sadness. 

He finally leaves the suffocating building but doesn't head out of the campus, instead, he made his way against the wall of this building, pressed his back against it, and slid down onto the ground and combed back his blonde hair with his fingers. A sigh escaped his lips as he felt entirely drained. Today felt like a completely weird day, it felt as if the world turned against him all of a sudden; when he wanted to see Minho and talk to him, he wasn't here, when he wanted to talk to Hyunjin about some random things Hyunjin's gaze always looked disinterested and that refrained Jisung from uttering out a single syllable. But why was he worried about Minho's absence? He questioned his feelings, he and Minho had only been friends for only a day now and he didn't know why he was so worked up over Minho not showing up to school, Minho has his reasons and Jisung wanted to refrain himself from stepping into Minho's private life. 

He lifts his head so that he was looking up at the sky. _Just great_ , the grey clouds were collecting, mocking Jisung's gloomy emotion. He let a sigh escape his lips and he closes his eyes, maybe it was all just a dream or something.

"Hey." It wasn't. He opens his eyes and his heart warms up at the presence of Daekhwa, he felt slightly better seeing him here before his eyes. The last time they've meet Jisung enjoyed talking to him, he was so understanding, patient and nice, Daekhwa could easily make it to his list of being one of his favorite people. Maybe Daekhwa would understand how he feels and might make him feel better. He was so good with his words and seemed to be the type who loved to uplift people's sad emotions. "Are you okay?" Jisung nods as a reply and the silver-haired male sits down next to Jisung and turned his head so that he was face to face with Jisung. "Hmm, doesn't look like it. Why did you leave the club?" He asks.

"I'm just upset, and I left the club because I'm not quite interested in it.

"I understand. What's making you feel upset?" 

"Friendship problems I guess," Jisung replies. "Maybe I'm jumping into conclusions or something, but my friend doesn't seem interested in me anymore since he has a boyfriend now. I feel so invisible."

"Have you talked to your friend about your feelings?" Daekhwa asks, "I think it's best if you talk to him and tell him about how you feel. I'm sure he would understand." He was right, Hyunjin wasn't the type to completely neglect a friend, and when Jisung often talked about his feelings, Hyunjin would understand his emotions and help him feel better. Jisung hoped it would work, he didn't want their close friendship to end over a pesky misunderstanding.

"I'll try to talk to him," Jisung says. "But what if he doesn't want to be friends with me anymore? After all, I'm just a boring person and his boyfriend is way much sweeter than I am. They are like two puzzle pieces fitting so perfectly against each other." He looks down at his thighs, so much sadness was gathering inside of him making him feel so horrible by the minute. 

"I don't agree," he replies, "You're so sweet in my eyes, and you're definitely not boring. When I met you that other day you were way past the word boring, you are completely fun to talk to and I hoped that I could encounter you more often." Jisung blushes at that. "So dont downgrade yourself too much okay? You are so special and don't let assumptions hurt you like this." Jisung nods as a reply, feeling a teensy bit better.

"Thank you," He replies. Daekhwa smiles. There was a minute of complete silence, it wasn't a negative silence, the silence was embracing Jisung and the only sounds he could hear was the thumping of his racing heart and the faint swishing of the wind causing the fresh green leaves to rustle. He felt peaceful on the inside and the fact that Daekhwa was sitting beside him silently as well, made him feel cared for in a way. 

"I know this is early to say, and I know we've only met on Tuesday, but I like you Jisung, like a lot a lot," Daekhwa confesses, putting an end to the silence. Jisung's eyes widen a little, and he turns his head towards the silver-haired male who was looking right into his eyes with so much love and sincerity. 

"O-Oh," Jisung replies meekly, "I may like you a lot, a lot, as well." Daekhwa chuckles at that.

"Give me your number?" 

Jisung smiles and nods.

\--------

Jisung was now back at his dorm laying on his back thinking about what had happened approximately twenty minutes ago. He and Daekwha had a small conversation before they decided to part ways since he wanted to go back to the dance club and Jisung wanted to go back to the dorms so he could just think about everything. He couldn't believe Daekhwa confessed to him, it felt as if it were a dream. His gloomy day eventually turned into a decent day after hearing so many assuring words come out of the silver-haired male's mouth. Daekhwa was so perfect in a way - not only because of his beautiful facial features but he was so true with his words and helped Jisung feel better. 

He felt like he was going crazy and didn't know what to do. Should he text Daekhwa once the dance club ends? There were countless amounts of things he could text but he didn't want to sound so cringy. 

Almost an hour went by and his phone making a sound popped him from his bubbles of thoughts and he quickly fetched for his phone wondering what was the notification. He smiled when he saw a message from no one other than Daekhwa, he felt so warm on the inside upon seeing that name appear before his screen. He opened the message. 

Daekhwa [6:06 PM]: Hey Jisung! Would you like to go to a ramen bar with me tomorrow night? 

Jisung [6:06 PM]: Yeah

Daekhwa [6:07 PM] I'll text you the time tomorrow

Jisung [6:07 PM] Okay, I can't wait~!

Before he could let out a squeal of excitement the door opened and in stepped Hyunjin. He closed the door behind him, placed his backpack onto the floor not too far away from his bed and he settled down onto the edge of his bed. Jisung felt some tenseness as he stared at the expression on Hyunjin's face, he looked so upset? No, stressed?

"Jisung we need to talk," Hyunjin says as he looks into Jisung's eyes, his voice sounded so dark just like the expression on his face. Jisung swallowed dryly and waited for the black-haired male to continue. "I think we need to tone down our friendship, Jeongin feels uncomfortable seeing us being so clingy and it's best if we keep our distance okay?" 

"O-Okay," Jisung replies his voice becoming frail. It felt as if a sword pierced right into his heart. 

"So you're not upset?" Hyunjin raises a brow. Jisung quietly shakes his head. He knew that complaining against it wouldn't do him any good, he wanted Hyunjin to feel happy. The two shouldn't be so clingy, Hyunjin has a boyfriend to be clingy to and Jisung felt that it's best if he didn't interfere. "Thank you for understanding," Hyunjin smiles a little. Jisung wasn't pleased. Forget talking about his feelings, Hyunjin probably wouldn't care. 

"Maybe we shouldn't walk to school together right?" Jisung says, slight bitterness making its way right at his tongue. "If we need to tone down our friendship I believe it's best if we avoid each other, right?" Hurt flashed before Hyunjin's eyes and Jisung choose to ignore the emotions, Jisung was just as hurt. 

"Jisung you know that's not what I mean right? We don't completely need to avoid each other," Hyunjin frowns.

"But it's best if we do you know? It'll help with the toning down."

"You're right, Jisung-ah," Hyunjin replies trying his best not to sound so pained. 

Just yesterday they were so happy to be around each other, and today it felt as if several stones fell right on top of Jisung causing him so much pain all around him. He had expected too much from Hyunjin but didn't expect this day to come. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Hyunsung friendship had come to an end and there is still more yet to come.


	8. Sick of it

The morning was dragging by so slowly - it was agonizing but it is what it is. He had to rely on himself to wake up, instead of Hyunjin waking him up because the two decided to lower their friendship and as much as Jisung hated it he was the one who pointed out that they shouldn't even walk to school together. Therefore Jisung set up his alarm so that he could wake up at fucking six in the morning to get dressed and head off to his University, it was pretty weird for a student to be there this early. At six-thirty nothing was open, not even the library which is scheduled to open at eight and the cafeteria opens and begins to serve breakfast at seven so Jisung had no other choice but to sit down at a bench and put on earphones to watch videos on his phone to pass by the time that was moving slower than a sloth. 

But instead of focusing on the video playing right before him on his phone screen, he would glance at the time on the top of the screen, hoping that it would strike seven; wishing he could just go to the warm cafeteria already. The cold early morning air was biting at his thighs that were exposed by the ripped fabric of his jeans. 

He liked how the crisp cold morning air was brushing against his face, but didn't like how it was bringing in some coldness to his legs and arms. 

He lets out a little sigh, turns off the video, and opens up iTunes instead to listen to his favorite playlist. Jisung leans back against the metal backrest of the bench and closes his eyes. The smooth tune of the music has brought in some haziness and eventually, he drifted away - going back to sleep. 

"Is he dead? Yah! Jisung Hyung wake up!" Jisung jolts awake and notices that Seungmin and Felix were standing right in front of him, the worry was evident on Felix's face and Seungmin had a completely contrasting expression, he looked like he was about to burst out into laughter. Jisung removes his earphones and unplugs it from his phone, stuffing it into his backpack. He checks the time on his phone - 7:45 AM, was he asleep for that long?

"Definitely not dead, Felix Hyung," Seungmin cackles, "Why aren't you asleep in your dorm?" Jisung didn't want to say anything about what happened yesterday night with Hyunjin so he tries to think of a half-lie. 

"I wanted to try to go to school early," Jisung replies, well technically it was true; he wanted to come to school early so that he didn't have to face _Hyunjin_. But what was the point of that? He was going to see him no matter what. 

"Well, that is rare to hear from a person who enjoys sleeping," Seungmin laughs. Jisung narrows his eyes at the younger threateningly. 

"Oh come on, maybe I want to try new things and make myself a morning person." Felix snorts at that.

"Impossible," Felix says and shakes his head. "Let's go get breakfast, I'm hungry." 

They ordered their breakfast and sat down at an empty table. The cafeteria was a little quiet at this time since there wasn't a lot of students; Jisung assumed that others may just come later after getting plenty of sleep.

"Are you sure nothing happened between you and Hyunjin?" Felix asks and swirls his spoon in his parfait mixing in the strawberries into the yogurt. "The two of you _always_ come to school together." 

"No nothing happened, I just wanted to come early," Jisung says trying his best to look and sound truthful enough, even though he was partially lying. Thankfully the gullible Felix nodded in understanding, but Seungmin gave him a look of disbelief. The next couple of minutes they just talked as they ate and Jisung made sure to occasionally look at the entrance just in case Hyunjin arrives.

The moment he saw Hyunjin heading into the cafeteria, that was the exact moment Jisung sprung up from his seat making the two of his friends look up at him puzzled. He knows he has more excuses to make now. He loves Seungmin and all, but he is just too damn wise. 

"Where are you going?" Seungmin asks.

"To class," Jisung replies and that is when he realizes that he has a math class with Hyunjin right after breakfast. Well _someone_ has to arrive at the class early and pick a different seat to sit at. 

He and Hyunjin sat next to each other in that math class and talked to each other and joked around when they grew bored with the professor's monotonous lectures. However, the small fun times they had in that class would likely remain in the past now, Jisung didn't like that but knows he needs to deal with the dreadful amounts of boredom in that class.

"Your class starts in half an hour, why are you leaving so early?" Seungmin responds, narrowing his eyes in suspicion. Jisung isn't going to get away quickly, and in the corner of his eyes, he could see Hyunjin coming near. 

"I want to go to that class early."

"Why the hell would you go to your math class early? You wouldn't do that!" Seungmin replies seemingly growing suspicious with Jisung's uncanny antics, "What's _really_ going on? You came to school early, without Hyunjin, and then you want to go to class early when you usually walk with _Hyunjin_ to that class." Hyunjin approached the table and looked right at Jisung, the blonde could see so much hurt clouding those brown eyes making his heart sting so much. The older sat down, and Seungmin moved his head to the left and gazed at him seemingly wanting to ask him what was _actually_ going on. "Did you and Jisung fight?" 

Hyunjin blinks at Seungmin a few times, Jisung could tell Hyunjin wanted to act like nothing happened so that Seungmin and Felix wouldn't get worried. "What do you mean? We didn't fight, right Jisung?" 

"Right," Jisung replies and forces a smile. 

"You two are acting so weird," Felix pointed out.

"No, we aren't," Hyunjin answers also forcing a smile, he then turns his head back towards Jisung. "Jisungie, I'm glad you listened to my words and woke yourself up early, you aren't tired are you?" Hyunjin pulls on a concerned look, making Jisung feel so much annoyance. 

"No Hyunjin Hyung, I'm not tired at all," Jisung smiles widely following along with the acting; the exultant tone in his voice sounded _so_ fake he was sure that Seungmin wouldn't believe their words. "Well maybe a little, _but's it's all okay_!" 

He was acting like a gloomy person trying to force on a smile to assure those around him that he was happy and everything was alright but on the inside, the darkness was drowning him slowly and painfully. 

"That's good to hear," Hyunjin replies, the fake smile abandoning his lips.

"Uh, I'll get going now," Jisung says with slight awkwardness and begins to step away, "See you all during lunch!" 

"Okay, see you!" Felix says cheerfully; he seemed to have believed the obvious lies. 

In math class, Jisung sat all the way in the back and in the corner away from Hyunjin. He did try to pay attention to the lesson but his eyes still ended up wandering to were Hyunjin sat and Jisung would feel completely distressed with how things ended up. They didn't tone down their friendship; actually, their friendship was now in the dumps and ceased to exist. Twenty-four hours of awkwardness, unease, and pain; and things just _had_ to turn out like this. 

Jisung wishes their bond could repair, but he knew they needed some time and no way was he going to talk to Hyunjin about it. He wanted Hyunjin to speak up about it, after all, Hyunjin initiated the idea of toning it all down for _Jeongin_. But why was that kid uncomfortable? Yeah, Jisung knows he is always sticking by Hyunjin like glue, but that was his way of expressing his friendship and love for Hyunjin. 

Maybe it is too much. 

Jisung let out a little sigh, his gaze had not yet wavered from the black-haired male who was staring down at the surface of his table looking so pained. It took a single wipe at his cheek to make Jisung break apart. No Hyunjin shouldn't cry, Hyunjin being sad was Jisung's major weakness and it always hurt to see Hyunjin cry. Jisung couldn't do anything about it. He didn't _want_ to do anything about it. All he could do was watch. 

\--------

Jisung sat down next to Chan at the Cafeteria table, in the corner of his eyes he sees Jeongin and Hyunjin giggling, and acting so mushy towards each other; their love bloomed beautifully. When Jeongin picked up a french fry and neared it towards Hyunjin's mouth, Jisung tore his gaze away and looked down at his untouched warm lunch. Maybe it is best if Jisung avoided Hyunjin at all times, he has a boyfriend; a sweet and loving one, Hyunjin didn't need him as a friend anymore - Jisung tells himself in his mind. 

As much as he tried to think of the good things about this broken friendship, the hurt feelings still managed to grab at his heart and squeeze it. Jisung thinks about how sweet and caring Jeongin is, and he wouldn't forget the first day of University when the younger approached Jisung to apologize on behalf of Minho's rude behavior. 

_Jeongin is so much better than me._

Jisung picks up his spoon and scoops up a spoonful of his fried rice and stuffs it into his mouth -chewing at it very slowly as he was lost in these gut-wrenching thoughts. He had no appetite. The sadness satisfied his stomach enough. 

"Why must I witness your sickening love every day," Seungmin grumbles and takes a huge bite of his sandwich harshly showing off his irritation. 

"Is Seungminnie growing tired of it?" Hyunjin says in a fake sweet tone, "I'm so sorry."

"I've been tired of it all," Seungmin replies once he swallowed the sandwich piece. 

"I think it's adorable, they look so cute together," Felix says with a smile, Jisung turns his head towards them curiously. Hyunjin chuckles and leans into Jeongin's body who wrapped an arm around Hyunjin. Jisung purses his lips but before he tore away his gaze he saw Jeongin glare at him, his expression was so dark that Jisung couldn't even believe that that person was the angelic and friendly Jeongin. 

That glare made it all click. Jisung believed that Jeongin doesn't like him and that's probably why he told Hyunjin that he is uncomfortable and Hyunjin could've decided to not be close to Jisung anymore to please Jeongin. _Boyfriends before friends right?_ Jisung bitterly thinks to himself. Years' worth of friendship is less important to Hyunjin than almost two days worth of dating. Jisung smacks himself mentally - he shouldn't be jealous, he shouldn't be irritated. He should feel happy for Hyunjin. 

"Jisung, are you okay?" Changbin who was sitting across from the blonde asked. "You don't look so good, and you're so quiet today." Seungmin seemed to have heard and looked at Jisung curiously, he probably wanted answers as well. Seungmin is another person difficult to lie to, he is very quick-witted. Jisung was sure Seungmin didn't believe any of the lies earlier this morning either. 

"I'm just worried," Jisung replies, not that he was, he was rather disappointed, upset, _hurt_. 

"What's making you worried?" Changbin frowns. _What's making me worried?_ What could Jisung say? _Oh_. The realization hit him. Minho wasn't present again. Now _that's_ pretty worrying. What the hell happened to Minho anyway preventing him from showing up to school? If there was someone Jisung wanted to see so badly - it was Minho. He didn't know why, but he just wanted to talk to him more. 

"Minho," Jisung responds. "He wasn't here for two days now." Chan's head perks up at the mention of Minho's name. 

"Yeah, he didn't show up to today's dance class," Felix chimes in, "The teacher was worried about him."

"I tried texting Minho and calling him, but he wouldn't answer," Chan speaks, "He is usually quick to reply. Maybe something came up and he wasn't able to make it to school today." 

"Yeah," Felix replies. "Maybe something very important."

"Let's not get too worried about him, Minho is pretty bold and wouldn't let anything happen to him," Chan assures. "I don't get why he didn't answer his phone though, but hopefully he shows up tomorrow." Jisung nods in agreement.

"Are you going to eat that?" Changbin asks pointing at Jisung's fried rice. 

"No, I'm not hungry, you can have it," Jisung pushes his plate towards Changbin who happily accepted it. "It probably got a little cold though."

"That's fine, thank you~" 

\--------

It was getting dark outside, and Jisung walked through the side-walks absentmindedly with his hands shoved into the pockets of his jeans. The sadness was still leeching onto him, and he just wanted to swat it away - like that was going to be easy. It was acting like his worst enemy right now, it was here at the wrong time and was being so stubborn - couldn't he just be happy for tonight? He was going to meet Daekhwa at the ramen bar that was just down the street, he shouldn't feel this way. It's supposed to be a special and happy night. 

He stopped right at the corner of the building and took a deep inhale in. _Jisung, don't frown, don't be so sad, just be happy, just for tonight, I shouldn't ruin this because of how today went,_ Jisung tells himself in his mind. He hoped he could keep up a cheerful facade. 

He enters the ramen bar, meeting with the warm air and comfy atmosphere. The place was so pretty and yellow lights were twinkling against the ceiling making the contentful emotions nestle into him. Now, this is how he is supposed to feel - Jisung smiles with triumph. He looks around and spots the familiar silver-haired person perched at a small table. He walks over to that spot.

"Hey," Daekhwa puts away his phone and looks up at Jisung and smiles so exquisitely. 

"Hi," Jisung replies, smiling as well and he pulls the chair back and sits down. "I wasn't too late was I?" 

"No, I just came five minutes ago," Daekhwa chuckled. He picks up the large menu and outstretches it towards Jisung, "You can choose first." The blonde grabbed it, opened the menu, and began to scan through the food items, other than ramen there were varieties of sushi and salads as well - he wasn't going to get the salad, that's for sure.

Once the two ordered their food, Daekhwa turned his gaze towards Jisung and smiles. "You look great today." 

"Great?" Jisung laughs, "I'm just wearing the clothes I wore to classes today, I'm sure I don't look so great."

"No, no. You look great in general, so beautiful and you make me smile," Daekhwa asserts, and Jisung could feel his face flush. As much as he liked compliments, sometimes it could make him feel so shy and flustered. "What are your interests?" Daekhwa asked, changing the topic much to Jisung's relief. 

"I like to sing, rap, and write lyrics I guess," Jisung replies, "I loved doing those things for a really long time."

"Ohh, one day I would love to hear you sing and rap."

" _One day,"_ Jisung giggles, "Or maybe soon."

"I'll wait as long as I can just to hear your beautiful singing voice." Again, Jisung felt a blush creep up to his cheeks and he averts his gaze down at the brown wood table making Daekhwa chuckle. 

"How are things going with your friend? Did you two talk things out yet?"

"It's going okay," Jisung lied. "The talking...well...I'll work on it." No, he didn't want to talk to Hyunjin. 

"Ah, I understand, it's good to take your time, I hope things go well between you two." 

"I hope so too," Jisung says, barely pulling on a tiny smile. 

While eating their ramen they just talked about the simplest of things, like what were their favorites things and they've disclosed _some_ things about their lives, Jisung didn't say much about his as he just talked about how he spent most of his times doing the things he loved. Daekhwa asked how his day went and Jisung, of course, said his day went well, although it didn't - he had to reply positively as he didn't want to make himself look gloomy. 

"I had a great time," Jisung says once he steps out of the ramen bar with Daekhwa. Daekhwa smiles cutely. 

"I'm glad you did, I also had so much fun with you." He leans forward and quickly presses a kiss against Jisung's cheek making his heart skip a beat. "See ya!" 

"See you," Jisung smiles and the two parted ways. He walked through the sidewalks again and waited for the bus right at the bus stop. Hesitantly, he reached for his cheek and pressed his cold fingertips against the place where Daekhwa pressed a kiss on and he smiled to himself. He questioned if they were official now. He liked him a lot, he was just so charming and supportive, the qualities Jisung loved in a person. 

\--------

Two days passed by, things started to become more like a painful routine and Jisung was growing so sick of it all. He came to the dorm, pretended that Hyunjin wasn't there, but sometimes he would sneak glances at him to check his emotions. Jisung would also just do his homework and study to keep his mind distracted. Then he would wake up at 6 in the morning and sleepily get dressed and head to university only to sit at the bench, listen to music and fall asleep and funny enough Seungmin and Felix would always arrive and wake him up. Seungmin still questioned everything and those looks of suspicion had never left his eyes.

Jisung feels like talking to Hyunjin, not only about their torn apart friendship but also about Jeongin, maybe the two could meet up with Jeongin and talk things out with him. Jisung knew he couldn't survive for too long, Hyunjin was his source of happiness, his hyung glowed before his eyes and he needed the warmth that Hyunjin's genuine smile brought. These past three days all he got from his ex-best friend was a forced smile just to make those around the two of them believe that there is no fire versus fire between the two. There was and Jisung was sure he was burned entirely. 

Maybe Jisung could speak to Jeongin himself, that kid wouldn't bite him, would he? He still remembered the glare that the younger had sent him and it brought shivers down his spine. Could he manage to talk to him? He wasn't sure. Maybe Jisung could ask Minho to speak to Jeongin about it all; Minho and Jeongin are close friends as well.

Sadly, Minho hadn't been here for days now, and Jisung wanted to see him so badly. The last time he talked to him was when the two were together in Jisung's dorm, and after that, there was no trace of Minho, it was as if he just disappeared - no text, no calls, nothing. It seemed like Ten, and the two secretaries Yunho and Mingi were the only ones who knew. Of course, Minho would contact them. 

"Han Jisung, at the bench _again_ ," Seungmin says, Jisung was popped out of his thoughts and he glanced up to him. "At least you're awake. Are you sure you are okay though? You have been coming to University early for four days now and I'm sure you don't like it."

"I'm alright, I've already said that I'm trying to become a morning person," Jisung replies flatly.

"Something is going on with you and Hyunjin, you two don't talk to each other as usual. I've noticed that these past few days," Felix stated, the expression on his face didn't show any happiness at all, he looked pretty upset. "I know you well enough to say that you're not the type of person who would wake up so early in the morning and wait for the cafeteria to open. You'd rather wait at your dorm than wait outside." Felix wasn't wrong. "Hyunjin has also been acting weird around you, and I could almost feel the tension between you two."

"Nothing is going on between us."

"Yes, there is!" Seungmin shouts, making Jisung flinch a little. "You are avoiding Hyunjin, and he is doing the same! I know what you two are trying to do, pretending in front of us is so fucking stupid. Jisung, my friend, you are very easy to read, I know when you are sad! Can you tell us what is wrong at least? We want to help you two." 

"I...I...we..." Tears began pouring from Jisung's eyes. There was no use with pretending in front of them. It was hard enough trying to avoid Hyunjin and even harder to lie that everything was going well. It felt like he was drowning in a sea full of discontentment. "W-we aren't friends anymore." Seungmin's eyes widened and Felix looked completely devastated. 

"Did he hurt you?" Felix asked, Jisung lowered his head and shook it. He felt arms wrap around him and lift him so that he was standing, it was Seungmin's arms - trying to calm down the sobs escaping his lips. 

"Jisung Hyung, it's okay," Seungmin gently uttered as he patted Jisung's back, only to have him push his face onto his shoulder and cry harder. He wanted to let out everything and tell them about how Jeongin was uncomfortable about him and Hyunjin being together but wasn't sure if he should tell them anything related to it. There was no doubt that they would seek reasons for the broken friendship between Hyunjin and Jisung. 

"Why is he crying?" The honey-voice that Jisung hasn't heard in so long spoke. 

"Minho Hyung!" Felix shouts happily, Jisung pulls away from Seungmin and wipes away the tears that were streaming down his cheeks. He gazed over Felix's shoulder and saw Minho standing there wearing shades and a black cap, he was holding onto a piece of paper and his mouth was in a flat line. "Hyung where were you?" 

"Nowhere important," Minho states, he then turned his face towards Jisung. "Why is Jisung crying?" 

Seungmin glanced at Jisung, it seemed like he was trying to ask if it was okay to tell Minho. The blonde responded by shaking his head. 

"Minho why are you wearing shades?" Seungmin asked, changing the topic.

"It looks cool," He simply replies, Jisung noticed how drained he sounded.

"Minho Hyung, what were you doing for these past few days?" Felix asks.

"Sleeping, nothing too important, and if you'll excuse me I need to go turn this in," Minho lifts the paper he was holding onto to prove his point and he walked away. 

"Weird," Seungmin frowns. "Should we follow him?" 

"What about breakfast?" Felix pouts.

"We have a lot of time for that," Seungmin laughs, "Jisung would you like to stalk Minho with us too?" Jisung cracks a little smile and nods. 

And here they were, following right after Minho, trying to avoid making a single sound. If they wanted to find out something they needed to stay hidden from him. Minho walked into the main University building and the trio waited for a brief three seconds before entering as well. He turned to the hallway on the left and they did the same. Jisung's heart was beating so fast, he was afraid of being caught. He kind of felt guilty for doing this because Minho seemed private about his absence and didn't want to reveal anything.

They continued to follow him up until he entered a certain place, with large floor to ceiling windows revealing the inside of the office and there were a few students there. Jisung felt upset when he figured out what that place was. The place Minho entered was the student health care center. The three looked at each other with concern filled eyes. 

"He is sick isn't he?" Felix mutters. "No wonder why he was gone for long." They turned around and started walking through the hallway again to head to the Cafeteria.

"He doesn't even look that sick," Seungmin sighs, "Or maybe he injured himself or something."

"It could be that," Felix replies, "He didn't show up to school after that day he hit his head during dance practice." 

Jisung remembered how sick Minho looked the last time he saw him and Minho himself claimed that he threw up. If Minho had been gone for so long maybe he was critically sick or something. Waves of worry began pushing its way into Jisung, and he hoped Minho wasn't _too_ sick. The brunette looked so bothered and he had a stony expression earlier, clearly showing how unwell he was. 

Jisung wanted to ask if he was okay, that's all. It wasn't too much to ask, was it? 


	9. Here for you

Hearing Hyunjin's pretty laugh made Jisung feel much more grief-stricken. He missed it when Hyunjin laughed alongside with him, he missed it when they were friends. But now hearing Hyunjin laugh at _Jeongin's_ corny jokes was scratching painfully at Jisung's heart. Jisung could see Hyunjin sparkle with so much comfortableness and vitality around his 'cutesy' little Jeongin - in his eyes he was a living angle, but in Jisung's eyes Jeongin was beyond a living angel, actually, he is completely opposite, he could be a fucking demon, or maybe not. 

Jisung thinks he was just overthinking things... But was he? Jeongin was just so _weird_. He'd giggle and smile with Hyunjin with so much adoration, and love, but once his eyes locked with Jisung's it is as if a dark aura kicked in him within an instant and he'd shoot glares loaded with so much rage at Jisung. But why? Jisung wished Jeongin wouldn't despise him so much, just because he was previously friends with Hyunjin. He didn't intend to make Jeongin feel so uncomfortable just as how Hyunjin claimed. He just wanted to be friends with his ex-best friend again. He doubted that it was possible though, they weren't going to be friends any time soon. At least until Jeongin and Hyunjin aren't a couple anymore. How saddening. 

Jisung's thoughts are quite loud. Seungmin wasn't satisfied with that at all, after hearing from Jisung this morning that the two golden best friends that rarely fought weren't friends anymore, he was quite bewildered. 

During high school when he was with them, he had never seen them act like how they were acting like now, treating each other like strangers. Hyunjin was most definitely a loyal and forgiving type and Jisung was a completely reasonable type, and he wouldn't bring himself to fight without a good reason to do so. There must be a reason why the two were behaving this way, Seugnmin wanted to make it his mission to undercover what was causing the two to avoid each other. 

He had actually placed himself so that he could analyze both Jisung and Hyunjin's behaviors. He sat in front of Jisung and Hyunjin was seated at the end of the table, talking to Jeongin enthusiastically. It seemed as if he left Jisung damaged, and then not bother to spare a glance at the blonde who was so depressed. 

Jisung was corrupting himself little by little, and each frown he pulls on himself and each sigh was making both Seungmin and Felix heavily concerned for his well being. Felix wanted to make Jisung feel happy, but Jisung was filled with _so_ much sadness, that Felix's attempt at throwing some of his inner bursts of sunshine at him and help Jisung's lips genuinely curl up into a smile radiating _real_ happiness was a failed attempt. All the two wanted to see was Jisung bright and warm like his old self, but how long ago was that? Seungmin thinks that the experiences faced at this university had completely changed Jisung inner emotions. 

As he nibbled onto his sweet bread, he identified how highly strung the blonde looked as he would dart his eyes from one spot then back at his lunch. His mood was completely opposing Hyunjin's cheerful mood and something in Seungmin's gut is telling him that Hyunjin had hurt Jisung. He didn't seem to care about Jisung's feelings. However, Seungmin didn't just want to point fingers straight away and jump into conclusions without finding the reason for their split friendship. He wanted to find time to talk to Hyunjin and see what was going on. 

Another thing Seungmin noticed was how Jisung wasn't eating his lunch properly. In the last few days, he would just leave it behind or just give it to either Felix and Changbin, Jisung was kind and all, but he needed to eat _something_. He looked so sulky as he stared down at his lunch longingly, letting it sit there and get cold. It triggered Seungmin, and he wanted to see Jisung put the food in his mouth.

"Jisung Hyung, stop looking at your lunch like that, eat," Seungmin demands, "You lunch wants to be eaten." 

"Not Hungry," Jisung says. Seungmin scrunches his nose. Felix turns his head and looks at Jisung with so much aggravation that the glare in his eyes was giving Seungmin the chills even though the glare wasn't directed at him. 

Moments later, he seemed to have given up gazing at Jisung like that, the blonde wasn't even bothered by it - lost in his little world again. Felix let his face soften a little, then he picked up Jisung's tray, _finally_ grabbing the blonde's attention and looked at him miscehviously. Jisung looked back at him, unamused and with despair still hanging in his eyes. 

" _Jisung Hyung, eat me_ ," Felix says in a funny tone and nears the tray to Jisung's face. "I'm feeling too cold, and your mouth is so warm, I want to be in there." Changbin snorts, and then both Hyunjin and Chan ended up laughing. Seungmin hoped that would make Jisung smile at least a little or even laugh, but he didn't. 

"What?" Felix says with a frown. "What's so funny?" 

Seungmin shakes his head and smiles at him, he really is too innocent, or maybe he is just confused.

"Nothing you need to know," Chan replies making Felix puff out his cheeks and pout. 

" _Fine_." Felix turns his head back towards Jisung. "For reals though, you should eat. I'm not going to eat your lunch for you anymore. Not eating isn't going to make you any better, so please eat."

"What if it is making me feel better?" Jisung gazes at him challengingly.

" _Please?_ " Felix looks at Jisung with puppy eyes and Jisung immediately looked down at his tray, he picked up his spoon scooped up a large amount of the rice and shoved it into his mouth. As he chewed at it slowly, tears streamed down his cheeks. They all stared at him silently, unable to utter out a single word - too upset for them to do so. 

Jisung was eating his food but Seungmin didn't like how he was eating it while crying, he could tell that Jisung was just doing it out of either irritation or sadness - probably both. 

"Jisung Hyung..." Seungmin muttered out, his heart felt very heavy in his chest.

Jisung scooped up another spoonful and again, forced it into his mouth, and harshly wiped away the tears. Felix wrapped an arm around him and pulled him in close towards his body. Jisung was still holding tightly onto his spoon, and his bottom lip was wobbled a little as sobs flew from his mouth. Changbin placed a hand on Jisung's shoulder and gently massaged it in an attempt to him calm down - it wasn't working though, Jisung looked like he wanted to leave quickly. 

"Jisung-ah, what's wrong?" Chan says, his voice carrying so much pity. Instead of a reply, the blonde pulled away from Felix and abruptly got up from his seat. Felix stood up as well and lightly clasped onto his forearm trying to prevent him from leaving.

"Jisu-"

"I'll head out, I need some alone time," Jisung says and hastily walked away from their table. 

"Yah! Jisung Hyung!" Felix called out for him, but it was pointless to do so and they watched as he left the cafeteria. 

Seungmin looked at Felix and then at Hyunjin, guilt was evident in his eyes. Seungmin wanted to ask him about what happened between them, but felt like now wasn't the right time. Seungmin knew one thing: Jisung and Hyunjin's friendship is a complete mess right now and has its severity, making it a bad time to ask anything. But this has been going on for days, and all Seungmin wished for was for things to be how they were previously. Watching the two of them act like this was making him feel so down. 

"What's wrong with him?" Changbin asks as he moves to the empty seat next to him (previously Jisung's) so that he was next to Felix, "I've noticed that he was acting this way for the past few days and he always looks so down during music production class and only quietly does his work with Chan Hyung and me."

"Yeah, he used to enthusiastically talk and work, but now he is too quiet and it's worrying me so much. We need to do something," Chan chimes in, "I miss the happy Jisung."

"We all do," Seungmin replies, and sighs. It felt like ages since he had seen the joyful smile and the crescent eyes whenever Jisung was _actually_ happy and laughing with so much glee. It was upsetting to see Jisung bottle up everything inside him, and just sit there silently and just let the pain run lose inside of him. Seungmin wanted to do something that would make Jisung smile again and feel happy again, but he just didn't know what to do and he felt so bad. 

"But seriously, why is he sad?" Changbin asked.

"Well _someone_ is being a bitch to him," Felix scowls. In the corner of his eye, Seungmin noticed how Hyunjin stiffened and he looked guilty. _Oh no_.

"Who?" Chan asks, gazing at Felix questioningly. Felix opened his mouth to speak, but then immediately closed it and looked at Seungmin. In response, Seungmin decided to give him a hard stare, and he hoped that Felix would take that as a sign to not reveal anything. 

"I think that is something Jisung needs to say," Seungmin responded, and Chan nods in understanding. Seungmin then turned his face towards Hyunjin and he noticed that Jeongin wasn't there anymore. When had he left? "Where did Jeongin go?"

"To the bathroom," Hyunjin mutters as he stared at his phone. 

"Ah, okay." 

\--------

Jisung strides through a random corridor as he wiped away his tears, not caring where he was heading. He decided to come to a pause and he walked over to the wall and pressed his back against it and briefly looked around, he hadn't walked too far away from the cafeteria. It was so suffocating back there and that look Felix had given him made him feel much more remorseful. He didn't need pity, he needed understanding. 

"What's with you?" Jisung turned his head towards Jeongin who was approaching him, a pissed-off expression was placed on his face. Had he followed him here? Jisung began to feel very tense. Yeah, Jeongin wasn't such a little angelic boy when he was mad like how he seemed to be now. Jeongin stopped in front of Jisung and turned towards him. "I said what's with you! Why are you acting so sad like that?! Tell me." Jisung bit onto his bottom lip and gave the younger a dark look, anger overpowered his feelings of dejection. 

"It's you!" Jisung responds, his voice just as icy as Jeongin's. He had to muster up so much courage to spit back at the younger like this. "Why are _you_ acting like that?" 

"Me?" Jeongin points at himself and laughs, "Look at yourself, you attention seeking bastard." _Attention seeking?_ Non-sense, Jisung hated being the center of attention. "You are sulking over pointless things, if Hyunjin doesn't want to be your friend then be it! Why must you act like this? You have Chan, Felix, Seungmin, Minho, and Changbin, you don't need Hyunjin." 

"Just because they are my friends doesn't mean that Hyunjin shouldn't be my friend," Jisung replies and then gives him an accusing look. "Why must you not let Hyunjin be my friend? What did I even do wrong?"

"Well, how would you feel if you were dating someone, and the person you're dating has a friend who is always all up over their face and acting so friendly, and hug them and such? How would you feel huh? I know one thing for sure, I'd feel upset, and I'm pretty upset that you were acting that way towards Hyunjin," Jeongin explained, his voice so venomous. "He means so much to me."

"He means so much to me as well!" Jisung replies, "He is, or was my best friend!"

" _Oh really?_ He means so much to you?" Jisung furrows his eyebrows and nods. Jeongin scoffs. "Deal with it. Oh and think about this; I did tell him I was uncomfortable with you being around him, and if he did care about you, he wouldn't have agreed to not be your friend anymore, so if I were you just back away. Crying is not going to bring Hyunjin back to you. Stop making him feel so guilty, he feels completely horrible all because of you." Jeongin backs away. "Don't be so stupid." He turns and walks away. 

"You really are something," Jisung sighs, disliking Jeongin's attitude. He thinks about what the other had just said. Hyunjin wouldn't have agreed if he cared enough about Jisung? Jisung's heart tore at that. Jisung wondered if Hyunjin had even considered their friendship, was he just pretending to be his friend? 

_"You seem quite burdensome."_ The memory of being at the café sped into his mind, the words from no one else but Minho. Jisung lowers himself down onto the floor and pulled his legs towards his chest. Although Hyunjin had assured him that he wasn't being a burden, he couldn't help but feel like one. He _is_ making Jeongin uncomfortable, he _is_ making Hyunjin feel guilty. What if he _is_ being an attention seeker? What if he _is_ bringing Hyunjin down somehow?

Jisung hates himself for how he is. 

"Ten Hyung, why are you ignoring me? I said I was sorry, I didn't know you hated oranges." _Ten?_ Jisung turns his head and looks at a group of four walking together, Ten looked bothered and Mingi was smirking. Just by the sight of Ten, Jisung immediately remembered about Minho and wanted to know if he was okay, he did see him in the morning but it just wasn't enough to assure him if Minho was okay or not. Following him to the Health center wasn't sufficient. He gets up from the ground and started approaching them.

"I just don't like fruits, I don't shove vegetables at you - oh hey!" Ten says halting in his movements once he notices Jisung in front of him. His frustrated expression disappeared and was replaced with a smile, the four behind him gave him a confused look. "I remember you, you came to the dance club in the first meeting. Your blonde hair is quite vibrant. May you introduce yourself?" 

"My name is Han Jisung, first-year student," Jisung greets. "I know Yunho Hyung and Mingi Hyung since I came for the second day only for a little bit. I just don't know you." He looks right at the black-haired male who smiled at him and waved happily. 

"Hello, I'm San, second-year student. It's a pleasure to meet you," San introduces himself and does a fancy bow.

"Idiot," Yunho snickered and poked San's side. "You have too much confidence." 

"So, did you need to ask me anything?" Ten asked and raised a brow.

"I was just wondering if Minho Hyung was okay, he has been missing classes for days now and it's making me pretty worried. I know he injured himself, but did it make him super ill?"

"You must be his friend. Well, sorry he doesn't want anyone knowing about it." Jisung frowns a little at that response. 

"Do you at least know where he lives, I want to stop by and make sure he is fine."

"You win," Ten sighs, "Actually I'm planning on stopping by at his place to check up on him, you can come along with me if that makes you feel better." Jisung blinked several times wondering if he had heard Ten right, Minho wouldn't be upset, would he? Jisung hoped not. 

"What's with that look on your face?" Ten chuckled, "You can come along. You should see how whiny Minho acts it's hilarious. That careless overworking prick should've been much careful. Oh goodness, I just want to smack him but I can't."

"Ouch, that was harsh," San cackled, Mingi nodded in agreement.

\--------

Ten said that they could meet up at the performing arts building, and that's exactly where Jisung was heading, walking at a fast pace. Once he had arrived, Ten, Mingi, Yunho and even San were standing there - cheerful expressions on their faces once they had noticed Jisung. Ten immediately lead them to his car, and they settled inside. Jisung sat in the back with Yunho and San, whilst Mingi placed himself at the passenger seat. 

"Minho's place is pretty close," Ten says as he started the engine. "I hope this time he is _happy_ to see us. He's been acting so moody."

"Who wouldn't after missing so many days," Mingi sighed, "I'd be so anxious because fucking professors give so much work."

"Like you even do your work," Yunho laughs.

"Shut up Hyung," Mingi grumbled. "Don't expose me like that in front of Jisung." Jisung giggled as a response and turned his head looking out the window. 

They arrived at the apartment building Minho lived in, and they walked through the hallway until Ten stopped right at the door to Minho's apartment. Jisung felt nervous for some reason, he didn't know whether Minho would like seeing him here or not, but he wasn't going to back away. He needed to know what was going on with Minho.

Ten pressed in the code to the apartment, and it beeped in approval and the five of them stepped inside. All the lights were turned off, and it was completely quiet here. Minho probably lived alone. Was he even here at the moment? 

"Okay, so don't speak _too_ loudly okay?" Ten says and Jisung nodded. As they stepped into the livingroom Jisung looked around and he saw a grey-furred cat looking right at them curiously from its spot on Minho's couch. _Cute,_ Jisung thinks _._ As much as he wanted to pet that cute cat, his main focus was to see how Minho was doing.

"Oooh, cat~" San pointed down, the four followed his finger and saw a cat staring at them, San walked over to the cat and knelt in front of it. He outstretched his hand and the cat turned away and leaped onto the couch. "Awh, it hates me." Yunho cackles at him. 

"It's just like Minho," Ten cackles, then he looked straight ahead at an open door, maybe Minho's bedroom. "Okay, let's greet him. I'm sure he is in his room."

They continued their way and stepped inside the room, it was dark in here as well and Jisung could see Minho in bed with his comforter over him. He must be sleeping. The four walked over to his bed and they stared at Ten expectantly who rolled his eyes in response.

"Minho-ah, get out from under there." Ten pats at Minho's comforter and Minho remains still. 

"Is he dead?" Mingi asks causally. Yunho covers his mouth with his palm stifling in his laugh. 

"No, he isn't, he is just being a baby," Ten replies. "Lee Minho, I have a surprise for you." He pats him again, and Minho squirmed from underneath. 

"Go away, my head hurts," He grumbles, it seemed as if he had awoken from his sleep. "And your talking isn't helping."

"Minho, you being like this isn't going to make your head feel any better," Yunho speaks. "I'm sure you'd want to return to school as soon as possible and talk to your professors about your assignments."

"No, they excused me from the assignments, I went to the health care center and they forwarded my proof of a hospital visit to the professors, they'll excuse all of the work to prevent me from feeling too overwhelmed. And I can't dance for a month, _isn't that great_? For dance class, I'll have to sit out, for the dance team I can't participate in the upcoming performance and I don't know what I'll do for the dance club," He replied, sounding so sad. Jisung felt so bad for him, no wonder why he seemed to be in a crummy mood. Minho wasn't able to do the thing he cherished so much. Jisung could relate to how he felt. 

"You drove didn't you?" Ten grimaced, "You're not supposed to drive."

"I don't care, I just want to get this all over with and return to school, and wait a _month_ to be able to do everything normally again," Minho sighs.

"Minho, it's alright, the month will pass, just be patient and take care of yourself," Yunho says assuringly.

"What's the surprise you were talking about?" Minho asked, changing the subject, but still not yet revealing himself from beneath the comforter. "Unless you were saying that to get me to talk."

"Yeah, I did, and apparently it worked," Ten jeered, "Two others came along, San who is probably in the living room trying to get along with your cats, and Jisung the friend who was worried about you."

"Jisung?" Minho quickly pulls the comforter down, and sat up, the quick movements seemingly affected his head and he grimaced and gripped at his head. Worry tugged at Jisung's heart when he saw the pained expression on Minho's face and all he currently wanted to do was massage the pain in Minho's head away so he wouldn't suffer from it so much. 

The brunette's eyes then met with Jisung's concerned ones and the older smiled a tiny bit, and Jisung waved and awkwardly smiled back.

"Hi, Minho Hyung."

"What's funny is that he didn't care about San and immediately reacted from Jisung's name, I smell his favorite," Mingi commented, Ten nods in agreement and laughed. 

"Minho you seem to look like you are feeling better. When are you returning to school?" Ten asked.

"In two days," Minho replies, "My headaches aren't that bad anymore and I'm not sick to my stomach as well, it's progress, sleeping was pretty comforting."

"I'm sure it was," Mingi says cheekily, and Minho shoots him a glare. 

"That's good to hear. We came here to check up on how you were doing, and it's very nice to see you feeling much better than before. I guess we'll get going now, I can't wait to see you at school," Ten smiles and then looks at Jisung. "Jisung would you like to stay here?" 

Jisung looks at Minho, who seemed to be giving him a pleading look. 

"Yeah, I'll stay here for a bit." Minho's lips curl into a small smile and Yunho scoffed at that.

"Take care Minho-ah," Yunho waved and the three of them exited the room.

"San, leave the poor cats alone, just accept the fact that they don't like you, and let's go, I'm hungry, Ten Hyung is going to pay for our meals." They could hear Mingi say.

"No, I didn't," Ten responds.

"They do like me, we are just working on our relationship," San whined.

"Yeah, yeah, in your dreams," Yunho chortled. Minho softly laughs at their mini bickering and once they hear the front door shut Minho turned to Jisung.

"You were worried about me huh?"

"Yeah, because you didn't come to school for days and didn't tell us why," Jisung says and placed his hands on his hips and tried to look disappointed but that bright appearance on Minho's face wasn't helping much. "What happened to your head anyway?" Jisung continued and tried to keep his expression firm. 

"Fine, I'll tell you, I guess there is no point of keeping it in anymore," Minho sighs, "So dance class I was working too hard and then slipped and hit my head very badly on the practice room floor. It was on the same day I came to your dorm. Anyway, I didn't mind the injury and continued to dance even when the dance teacher told me to rest, and I regretted not listening because after class I got sick from overworking myself hence leaving you hanging in the bathroom, I've explained that already," Minho pauses and Jisung nodded. 

"After visiting you in your dorm, I felt completely dizzy as I headed to my car, and my head was pounding so much and the pain was getting unbearable, so I went to the hospital and the doctor said that the injury resulted in my mild concussion, and he gave me two papers, one a proof of my hospital visit which I gave to the nurse in the student healthcare center, and the second paper just told me ways to help treat my concussion. I'm fine though, it's just a concussion, no big deal."

" _Just a concussion_?" Jisung scoffs, "You're hurt badly."

"Now that I told you everything, it's your turn to tell me why you were crying this morning. Allergies again?" Minho mocked, Jisung blushed in embarrassment.

"N-No!" Jisung replies, "I was just crying because I was feeling sad."

"No shit," Minho rolls his eyes and pats at the spot next to him on the bed. "Come here." Jisung wasted no second in planting himself onto Minho's comfy mattress. "Why were you sad? Did something happen to you?" 

"It's nothing really, I'm feeling better now."

"You sure about that?" Minho asks, giving him a suspicious look. Jisung quickly nods as a response. He felt bad for lying but it wasn't his intention to spill what happened between him and Hyunjin, he didn't want Hyunjin to feel terrible, Jeongin was already mad at Jisung for that and he didn't want to fume the younger much more, he was just too scary. 

"I can't wait to see you at university again, I missed you a lot," Jisung smiles, Minho's gaze hadn't wavered and he sighs.

"Stop dodging my question," Minho says but then smiles. "You missed me...? A lot? That's nice to hear. I'm glad you decided to come by and worried about me, I was kind of feeling lonely. You're officially my favorite person." Those last few words for some reason made delight cut into Jisung's heart. He was Minho's _favorite_? That was completely unimaginable for Jisung but he accepted it anyway. 

"I feel so proud of myself," Jisung smiles widely.

"You should, Lee Minho is limited edition, and you acquired that scarce item," Minho smirks.

"Is their refunds?" Jisung asked jokingly. Minho gasped in shock.

"No, there are no refunds, one-time sale only, and I'm sure I meet customer satisfaction, just look at me," Minho points at his face to prove his point. Jisung giggles.

"I get it, you look so pretty."

"You think I look pretty?" Minho slightly widened his eyes, "You flatter me so much. I don't think I need my pain pills anymore. So...how was Uni for the past few days?"

"It was okay I guess," Jisung replies, lying again. 

Minho was growing slightly irritated by how Jisung was hiding how he felt. He was just too simple to read, at least for Minho. 

"Wait a minute..." Minho mutters and cups Jisung's face making the younger flinch a little. He examines Jisung's face thoroughly. There were two things he felt. One - that shy look on Jisung's face was just so cute and all he wanted to do was stare longer...or kiss him, but he didn't want to make him uncomfortable, he probably didn't feel the same for Minho. 

The second thing Minho felt was extreme worry. He could pinpoint one huge thing - Jisung was completely wrecked; he had dark circles right under his eyes, either from tiredness or constant stress. His face looked so sunken in a way, and misery shone in Jisung's eyes. "Jisung are you sure you are okay? You look unwell." It doesn't look like he was sad only today, it seemed as if he was sad for a while. 

"I'm okay Minho Hyung, my face is just like that because I haven't been eating that much lately, no need to worry," Jisung says and Minho releases his hands from Jisung face. No need to worry? Minho just had to. So many details indicated that Jisung wasn't well - his run-down look on his face, Minho saw him cry this morning and lastly Jisung a major food lover wasn't eating well. Minho didn't want to ignore it all and foolishly believe Jisung's words. 

"Would you like something to eat?" Minho replies and already shifts so that he could get out of his bed and head to the kitchen to feed Jisung something. The younger gripped onto his arm, preventing him from leaving the bed. Minho looks at him with so much concern. 

"I'm not hungry," Jisung replies. Minho scoffed at that.

"Whether you are hungry or not isn't going to stop me from getting you something to eat _Han Jisung_ ," Minho says coldly, "The fact that you aren't eating is worrying me a lot and seeing you eat is what I want to see." 

Jisung sighs in defeat. "Fine. But I'll get it, I don't want you to move around so much." Jisung slips from the bed.

"Feel free to grab as much food as you want." Now Minho felt relieved. 

Jisung exited the bedroom, and Minho sighs. He just wanted these next two days to go by quickly so he could finally return to school and see what was causing Jisung to feel that way. Maybe he could ask Seungmin or Felix, they were the ones that were with him this morning. Or maybe he could ask Hyunjin, Jisung's best friend, perhaps he'd know what was going on, there was no doubt that Jisung would vent out to him about everything. 

A phone making a sound popped Minho from his thoughts and he looked down next to him at Jisung's phone. It probably has slipped from his pocket or something. He stared at the screen and a text message caught his attention. He picked up Jisung's phone and looked at the text.

Seungmin [3:40 PM]: Are you feeling better? Had Hyunjin hurt you? I kept on thinking about it, and the guilty look on Hyunjin's face is making me feel that he did. 

He stared at that message until the screen turned off on its own. Hyunjin did something to Jisung? That explained why Jisung was so sad, he was probably extremely hurt that his own best friend done or said something to him. 

Another similar sound came and he looked at the screen seeing another text from Seungmin. 

Seungmin [3:40 PM]: I can try talking to him for you if you're okay with that. 

He tossed the phone back onto the mattress and furrowed his eyebrow. How could Hyunjin the sweetest person ever have hurt his own best friend? Hyunjin seems to not be that type of person from what Minho had seen. 

He notices Jisung silently step into the room, holding onto a container filled with Minho's leftovers from last night. 

"Sorry for taking this, nothing else was interesting in your fridge," Jisung says shyly, "Is it okay if I eat it?" Minho chuckled and nodded.

"Have you heated it?" Jisung shook his head. "Go heat it, don't eat it cold, silly." Jisung spun back around and quickly headed back out to the kitchen. 

Another familiar sound came from Jisung's phone again, and as much as Minho didn't want to violate Jisung's privacy, his hands reached the phone. What could go wrong? All he wanted to do was crack Jisung's little mystery and discover what happened with him and Hyunjin. However, on the screen wasn't a notification of Seungmin's text. It was a notification from someone he had developed a disliking for.

 _Jeon Daekhwa_. 

Daekhwa [3:45 PM]: Hello Jisung! Would you like to go out on another date? I haven't seen you around for days and I miss you. 

_Date?_ Minho felt enraged and he felt his chest erupt into flames. The two are _dating_? The hell? He drops the phone back down onto the mattress and combs his long fringe back with his fingers trying to tame down the roaring flames. Daekhwa and Jisung? Minho personally thought that was a _big_ no-no. What's so good about that bastard anyway? Well, Daehwa wasn't just any bastard, he is a lucky bastard. Very lucky. What was so good about that pest anyway? Minho just wanted to stomp on him.

He wished he didn't slip and injured himself to the point of not being able to attend classes. If he hadn't, he'd still be at school, know what was happening to Jisung and lastly not let Jisung fall for Daekhwa. 

The smell of food pulled him out of his thoughts and he glanced up at the blonde who walked over to Minho's bed and sat on it. When he heard a grumble come from Jisung's stomach he immediately raised an eyebrow.

"So? You weren't hungry huh?" Minho says smugly.

"I can't help it, your food smells so good," Jisung pouts. "And my stomach betrayed me."

"You should come by more often, I'm very good at cooking," Minho says. He will compete with Daekhwa and try winning Jisung over, no matter what. Minho was sure that he could make dates a great experience for the pretty boy next to him, all he needed to do was figure out what he liked or not.

The two spent a while talking to each other, and soon enough Jisung had to leave. Minho offered him a ride, and of course, Jisung declined, still quite worried about Minho, and said that he will take the bus because the dorms weren't far away. Minho let him. 

Once he had heard the front door shut, he scrambled out of his bed, sat down at his desk, and pulled out his notebook, where he wrote his feelings in. He turned through the pages and stopped on a certain page. He picked up his pen and hovered the tip over one name he had written a while ago, the day he encountered Hyunjin and Jisung at the café to be exact.

Hwang Hyunjin.

He crossed out that name, he was so ignorant at that time. Hyunjin and Jisung were best friends and nothing more. Right underneath the crossed-out name, he wrote down Daekhwa's name. He was going to win Jisung over, even if it was going to be super hard. He was going to show Jisung how much he loves him, and no one else could beat Minho to that. 

He was about to close his notebook and place it aside but then Hyunjin popped up in his mind again. According to Seungmin's text message to Jisung, Hyunjin had made Jisung upset in some way. What kind of best friend is he? Jisung should just let that prick go, a flowery sweet boy like Jisung deserved so much better. 

After seconds of deep thinking, he decided to write down Hyunjin's name again, right underneath Daekhwa's name. He closes his notebook and places it on top of his textbooks. 

"Jisung," He says lowly, his voice coming out slightly cold and vicious. "You are _mine_."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Minho is so dedicated to Jisung :') and he has so many plans in mind.


	10. Drifting away

Once Jisung had returned to his dorm, he ignored Hyunjin as usual, he didn't even look his direction and just placed his backpack beside his desk and sat down. He pulled out his textbooks and tried to do his dreadful assignments. 

He felt kind of spiteful towards Hyunjin even though he didn't want to feel that way. Did he like Jeongin more than he liked Jisung? Of course. Hyunjin loves Jeongin so much, Jisung could see it in his eyes whenever the couple would talk to each other or even look at each other. There was no other reason why Hyunjin decided to end their year's worth of friendship - it was all for his boyfriend, just because Jeongin wasn't pleased with Jisung's actions towards Hyunjin. Could friends not show joy and affection towards each other? Why didn't Hyunjin think about Jisung before thinking about making Jeongin feel better? Why did he have to take his feelings and shred it into pieces? What were the years worth of friendship for? _Nothing?_

When he realized that he was just staring at his empty paper blankly, he quickly tries to complete his work but with thoughts still lingering in his mind. It was upsetting him, but whatever happened, happened - and dwelling over everything wasn't going to help him anymore. If he wasn't important enough for Hyunjin then be it, Jeongin was right, Jisung had others, especially Felix and Seungmin who seemed to care about him. There was no need for Jisung to be so selfish over Hyunjin switching to Jeongin. If Hyunjin is happy being with him then Jisung believed it was best to not interfere, and be a good human being and let Hyunjin enjoy. 

A few hours had passed and he managed to finish all of his assignments. He closes his textbook and stands up from his chair and stretches out his arms. He grabs his phone remembering that he had text messages to reply to and walks over to his bed and sits down. 

"Jisung," Hyunjin mutters out. As petty as Jisung felt, he ignored him, pretending that Hyunjin wasn't even in this room. 

"Jisung, listen to me," He says again. 

When Jisung didn't reply, Hyunjin separated himself from his bed, stepped over to Jisung's, and stood right before him waiting for Jisung to notice him. Was Jisung going to raise his head and look over at him? Nope. His fingers still lingered at his phone screen and then he pressed on YouTube and scrolled through his recommended feed. 

"Jisung can you stop acting like that? Can you at least hear me out?" 

Jisung finally looks up at him emotionlessly, "What is there for you to say? Do you need to clarify somethings? Make excuses?" 

"No," Hyunjin sighs with so much sadness, "I want to tell you how I feel."

"Tell that to Jeongin," Jisung replies, he knows he is being so shabby, "Afterall, he is your boyfriend, and I'm just someone you need to avoid. Aren't I right?" That seemed to have hit a little something in Hyunjin and Jisung could see some anger fill in Hyunjin's eyes and the other furrowed his eyebrows. 

"Oh, I see," Hyunjin frowned, showing how disappointed he is, "Being jealous aren't you?"

"There is nothing for me to be jealous of Hyunjin!" Jisung raises his voice and removes himself from his bed and stands right in front of the taller male. "Actually, I'm happy that you and Jeongin are together, I'm happy that you have some else to talk to, someone else to spend time with and laugh with. I'm not at all jealous. There is no need to worry. I'll be honest, I am upset with how things ended up between us, but it is all okay Hyunjin, I think I can endure it and forgot the times we were friends." 

He knew his words were crushing Hyunjin, he knew they were so acidic and was burning onto him. He could see Hyunjin's eyes fill with tears, he knows he shouldn't have been this harsh. 

"Look, isn't toning things down exactly what you wanted? That's what is happening. You and I aren't friends and of course, for days we've avoided each other pretty well. Jeongin seems happy about that. You now have him, he loves you, you love him. Isn't it perfect?" Jisung laughs but without any humor in it, it was a sour laugh. "I'm sure he is more important to you than I am, isn't that why you put Jeongin first before me? Can you just leave me alone? I don't want to interfere with you or Jeongin." 

He looked completely taken aback by Jisung's sharp words. He opens his mouth to say something but then immediately closes it and shifted his gaze down at his feet. Jisung just stood there watching how perturbed he looked. 

"I'm starting to dislike you," Hyunjin looks back up and stares into Jisung's eyes. He could see massive amounts of hurt in them. If he was trying to retaliate some hurt to Jisung, it was working well, because him saying that he disliked him pained him so much, "Why was I ever friends with someone so low like you?" 

Jisung's heart shattered into billions of tiny fragments just by those words. 

"It's nice to hear that you dislike me," Jisung responds. He doesn't dislike Hyunjin. He couldn't. Why would he dislike someone who previously treated him so well and cared about him so much? "I dislike you as well." But he said it anyway, just to see Hyunjin crumble right before him, and he did. Jisung was _very_ satisfied with it. 

"You were friends with someone low like me because that's what you created with your fucking actions!" 

Hyunjin stepped back, and a sob escaped from his mouth. Jisung couldn't bear the sight of seeing Hyunjin crying, he didn't want to feel any more hurt. He turned around so that he was facing his bed and let his warm tears spill from his eyes. 

He heard the other step away quietly, only soft sniffles could be heard from him, and he opened the door and closed it. Jisung wanted to chase after him and let him talk to him but instead, he sat down at the edge of his bed and hid his face with his hands and cried into them. He felt so stupid, horrible, malicious, and felt like he was a big petty monster. 

Deep in his heart, he felt so awful for saying such poisonous words to Hyunjin. Just because Hyunjin had hurt his feelings by practically driving away their friendship, didn't mean Jisung had to be so cruel in return. He just couldn't control himself well. _He deserved it, that's right,_ Jisung thinks to himself, he wanted to be reasonable with himself but that thought made him feel much worse. Hyunjin did somewhat change after getting himself to date Jeongin, he made Jisung feel hurt and invisible. He definitely deserves it all, he deserves to feel the same way. 

"Stupid, stupid, stupid," He couldn't stop those thoughts and removes his hands from his face and harshly wipes them against his jeans to clean off the tears. 

He decided to distract himself for a bit and reply to the text messages he received. He turned and grabbed the phone that was behind him and checked the messages that were sent to him hours ago. 

Seungmin [3:40 PM]: Are you feeling better? Had Hyunjin hurt you? I kept on thinking about it, and the guilty look on Hyunjin's face is making me feel that he did.

Seungmin [3:40 PM]: I can try talking to him for you if you're okay with that.

Jisung [10:22 PM]: I'm feeling much better. There is no need to talk to him for me, it's best if we aren't friends anyway. 

Daekhwa [3:45 PM]: Hello Jisung! Would you like to go out on another date? I haven't seen you around for days and I miss you. 

Jisung [10:23 PM]: I miss you as well, and yes, let's go. Friday? 

He turns off his phone, places it beside him, and stared at the door. He lets out a sigh, walked towards the light switch and turned off the lights before finding his way back to his bed. Hyunjin was probably at Jeongin's dorm or something, there was no point in chasing after him after saying such things to him. He turned to his side and let the drowsiness take him into slumber. 

\--------

Two days had passed, _finally_. He was never this excited about going to school, actually, he was just super eager to see Jisung.

These last two days were so painful and Minho kept on thinking about the thing he didn't want to think about - Jisung and Daekhwa. He had many tasks in hand, other than schoolwork; first, he needed to see what Jisung liked in Daekhwa, and second, he needed to keep an eye on Hyunjin, that prick had hurt Jisung in some way and if he sees that Hyunjin continues to act that way towards Jisung, Minho is going to confront him. 

He walked over to his closet and decided to wear something nice today, he put on a black and white striped shirt and his favorite black skinny jeans. He threw on a black denim jacket and grabbed his sports bag but just as he was about to toss in his practice clothes in there, he remembered that he was banned from dancing this entire month. He needed to recover fully before resuming vigorous activities. He let out a little huff of anger and placed the bag back to where it was originally placed and grabbed his backpack and headed out of his apartment.

He arrived at his University, got out of his car, and headed straight towards the main building. His first class started at nine, and he had a couple of minutes to spare before going there. Remembering that Jisung often comes to University early with Hyunjin for breakfast, he walked inside and turned towards the large cafeteria. He walked past each table until he reached the table where Seungmin, Felix, and Jisung where seated at. Hyunjin wasn't there.

"Oh hey Minho, glad to see you're back!" Felix says enthusiastically. Minho sat down beside Jisung. "I missed you so much, and dance class felt so boring without you there, I missed seeing you dance so skillfully but at least I'll see that today!"

"Ah, about that..." Minho nervously scratches the back of his neck. "I can't dance for an entire month." 

"Wait, what?!" Felix shrieks. "Why?"

Minho explained everything to them, and both Seungmin and Felix were very surprised to hear his story. 

"It's sucks that you can't dance for an entire month, but it'll pass," Seungmin says with an assuring smile. Minho nods even though he knew that this month was going to go by so slowly for him. What was he supposed to do in dance class today anyway? Sit out and watch the others dance?

It was time to head to their first class of the day and the four stood up from their spots on their table and parted ways - Seungmin and Felix walked away together to head to their class and Minho followed right after Jisung who was ahead by a couple of steps. He jogged until he was by his side and Jisung noticed, turned towards Minho, and smiled so brightly at Minho which made him smile as well - Jisung's smile was just so pretty and contagious. 

"I'll walk with you to your class," Minho stated and slung an arm over Jisung's shoulders, and they continued to walk like that. "What's your class?"

"Math," Jisung says and pouts, "Hate that class."

"Understandable," Minho laughs. "If you're ever struggling in that class, you can always ask me for help, I'm pretty good at math."

"Woah, really?!" Jisung says with wide eyes, "You must be so smart. What else are you good at?" 

"Trust me, I'm failing psychology right now and physics, I'm not so smart," Minho chuckled, although he didn't find it quite funny that he was failing two classes, but just wanted to laugh to lighten up the mood much more. He wanted to show Jisung that he could be a fun and optimistic person. 

"Maybe you're failing those classes because of your long absence?" 

"No, I never really do my work in those classes. It's not my fault they are such boring classes, but I'll try to work harder and fix my grades," Minho sighed, "I can't wait until next year, all my classes will most likely take place in the performing arts facility, as I am planning on majoring in dance." 

"Lucky," Jisung says, and he stopped in front of an open door. "Anyway, this is my math class, see you at lunch!" He grinned so prettily at Minho, making his heartbeat much faster but then sadness filled him once Jisung went inside the large class.

For a second he contemplated whether he should stick around with Jisung in this class or not, he didn't like his physics class anyway and was failing it - wait, he couldn't skip that class he missed too many days already. He checked the time on his phone - 9:03 and made a run for it before he gets into big trouble by the physics professor - he is quite a vicious and quick-tempered one. 

\--------

Dance class was exactly what he expected this morning: He was told to sit out and just watch the others dance. The dance teacher was slightly upset with him for not listening to him, Minho wished he did though, continuing to dance after hitting his head only did him more harm and enhanced his injury. 

He wanted to be productive enough, so he watched the students learn the complex choreography, and tried to memorize it. It worked well, he was so proud of himself. Minho could picture all the dance moves in his head, he couldn't wait to see the look on the teachers face once this month passes, he was going to show him that he learned it all just by watching. Though, he still wanted to physically learn it and was tempted to just join the students and learn along with them. Dance teacher Park is not going to be so happy to see him being reckless again, so he remains sitting while sulking a little. 

"Okay! Five-minute break, you know the drill, drink some water and rest your muscles," the teacher declares, and all the students started heading towards their bags. Minho's eyes moved to Hyunjin and Felix, and he observed how they grabbed their bag and headed right towards him. 

"Hey," Hyunjin says and sits down in front of Minho, Felix does the same. 

Minho wondered if he should respond to him even though he was irritated with the taller male. He for a second considered confronting him right now, and ask him what was going on, but would that be too sudden? Maybe it was best if he just tamed his darkening emotions, and be nice...for now. 

"Hey, how are you?" Minho replies.

"I'm okay," Hyunjin says monotonously, his expression seemed a little off, he would usually smile a lot. "How are you doing? Are you fine now?"

"Yeah, I'm perfectly fine," Minho says emptily, "Where were you this morning?"

"I was at the café with Jeongin, he wanted to go there with me." Finally, he was smiling.

"Ooh, how cute," Felix says and giggled, Hyunjin glared at him playfully before laughing it off. "I wish I could date someone so sweet and kind," Felix continues to say, and Minho not finding their conversation as interesting anymore, took out his phone from the pocket of his denim jacket and scrolled through his emails checking to see if any of his professors emailed him important things and when there wasn't anything major for him to do, he sighed with ease. 

"Time's up!" The dance teacher announces, Felix and Hyunjin both get up and head back to their spots to continue with the practice. 

When dance class ended, Minho followed after the two and headed straight towards the cafeteria. They got in line to order their lunch, and once they had gotten their lunch they made their way to an available table and sat down. 

"Hyunjin, I've been needing to ask you something," Felix starts, and curiously, Minho looked back and forth at the two. "Are you and Jisung good? It's been days since I've seen you two happily engage with each other. I'm sorry if I'm intruding in any way, it's just Jisung hasn't been well lately and you too. It's worrying me."

"Nothing is going on between us," Hyunjin replies a little too quickly, making Minho's suspicions grow, "We're fine, I guess..."

"Yeah, I don't see anything wrong either," a voice says. Minho looked beside him and saw Jeongin sitting down beside him, across from Hyunjin who's expression lit up upon the younger's arrival, the two must _really_ love each other. 

Felix let out a sigh, he looked very irritated and was chewing at his bottom lip. He didn't seem to believe Jeongin's words, and Minho could feel the same as well. The way Jeongin chimed into the conversation like that - defending Hyunjin, makes Minho think Jeongin is involved too, he seems to know something. 

"How are you feeling Minho Hyung," Jeongin says, smiling cutely at Minho. 

"I'm feeling well, thanks for asking Jeongin-ah," Minho replies sweetly to his close friend, "Has anything happened while I was gone?" 

"Not really," Jeongin purses his lips a little, and grins, "Hyunjin and I are dating, I think you may already know that, otherwise, nothing new happened."

"Ah, I see," Minho chuckles, "Well, it's nice to see you two together." 

Later, Changbin arrived and instantly took a spot next to Felix who greeted him cheerfully. Minho could see so much love in Felix's eyes, and Changbin has that same gaze. How could the two not confess to each other at this point? 

Seungmin and Chan arrived as well, and they both were sharing a conversation, Minho didn't listen too much but when he heard the word 'books' he knew they were talking about something relating to books, he knows Seungmin loves reading novels and Chan love reading Manga. 

Minho was starting to grow a bit bored, where was Jisung? It's been minutes into lunch and he didn't come yet. He stares at the entrance where several students were arriving into this large place, he hoped Jisung would come soon.

"Minho Hyung, is something wrong?" Seungmin asked. 

"Nothing," Minho responds. He wanted to ask where the blonde was but decided against it. Maybe he'll come later. 

He didn't come. 

\-------

Once class ended, Hyunjin rushed out of the building and stood beside a tree, this was his and Jeongin's official after class meeting place. He watched as students passed by, and once he saw the familiar blonde hair walking alone it felt as if something was pressing against his heart. That depressed look on Jisung's face was upsetting him, the two of them were over, they were broken and couldn't be repaired just yet. 

_"I'm starting to dislike you...Why was I ever friends with someone so low like you?"_ He completely regretted saying those things, but Jisung was acting too envious and Hyunjin wanted to express his frustrations because the blonde wouldn't just listen to him. He wanted to talk to him about his feelings and tell him how much he misses being friends with him, but _no_ Jisung was being too stubborn. Hyunjin couldn't blame him much, after all, he had hurt him. 

"Why the long face?" Hyunjin was popped out of his thoughts and saw Jeongin standing right in front of him with a look of worry placed right at his face. Hyunjin immediately smiles at him, trying to push away the younger's worried look.

"Just bored without you," Hyunjin pouts, Jeongin giggles, steps closer to him and presses a quick kiss against Hyunjin's cheek. 

"Awe, I'm here now~" Jeongin chuckles, "Let's go somewhere to eat before you return to your dorm."

"I don't think I want to return to the dorm today," Hyunjin sighs, "Can I stay over at yours if you don't mind?" 

"Of course!" Jeongin says, and Hyunjin smiles at him. 

The younger pressed another kiss against Hyunjin's cheek before wrapping an arm around him and leading him out of the campus. They headed inside the nearby fast food place and ordered the food they wanted. Hyunjin was about to pay for their meal, but Jeongin didn't want him to and quickly paid instead, making Hyunjin purse his lips at the younger who only laughed as he grabbed the receipt from the cashier and held onto Hyunjin's hand - dragging him towards an empty table at the back. 

Once their number was called, Jeongin got up and headed towards the front counter and grabbed their tray of food, and returned, placing the tray in the middle. Hyunjin reached for french fry and nibbled on it. 

He was feeling so regretful of his words towards Jisung, which had pushed the younger away making him not show up to lunch today, making him wake up early in the morning as usual when he is not morning person, but still manages to dress up nicely and leave first. He had broke Jisung the most, he made Jisung feel much worse and gloomy. Hyunjin felt like he was worse than Minho, but he knows that Minho's past rudeness to Jisung was just a facade while Hyunjin was clearly being a bad person to the blonde, and _that_ wasn't a facade - he had toned down their friendship, caring more about Jeongin's feelings rather than Jisung's hurt one. Was it too late to apologize to him? 

_"Look, isn't toning things down exactly what you wanted? That's what is happening. You and I aren't friends and of course, for days we've avoided each other pretty well."_ Hyunjin could almost hear Jisung's bitter laugh in his head. _"I'm sure he is more important to you than I am, isn't that why you put Jeongin first before me? Can you just leave me alone? I don't want to interfere with you or Jeongin."_

_"It's nice to hear that you dislike me...I dislike you as well...You were friends with someone low like me because that's what you created with your fucking actions."_

It did seem like it was too late to apologize at this point. He remembered how serious Jisung was with his words. 

"Baby, what's the matter? You've been staring at the french fries for almost a minute now, is everything okay?" Jeongin asks, he sounded super concerned and Hyunjin felt his cheeks heat up upon what the younger had called him. 

"Yes, I'm okay, just tired." Hyunjin picked up his burger and takes a big bite from it, and chews it while smiling, trying to act cheerful enough. Pretending was painful, and Jeongin didn't look convinced.

"Okay, but if you're feeling sad, you can tell me, and I'll try my best to cheer you up or help you."

"I'm fine." 

After finishing up their food, they left this place and headed to Jeongin's dorm which was in a different dormitory building. Hyunjin sat down on Jeongin's comfortable bed, he loved his bed so much, Jeongin's blanket was like a toaster, which soothingly warmed up his body, he just wanted to stay in these fresh-smelling sheets forever. 

Jeongin smiles and sits down next to him and placed his hand on top of Hyunjin's cold one. 

"Your hands are so cold," Jeongin says and holds onto Hyunjin's hands and tries to warm them up. "Are you sure you are okay? You looked anxious earlier while you were staring at your fries." 

"Jeongin-ah, I'm okay, there is no need to worry," Hyunjin says, trying to sound assuring enough, but Jeongin knew he was just lying. He didn't look well at all and Jeongin knows exactly why. It was all Jisung's doing, that pesky little blonde was acting so childish and just couldn't let go of Hyunjin. Why must he make Hyunjin feel this way? Why couldn't that blonde act as if nothing was wrong at least, for the sake of Hyunjin's happiness? Hyunjin would be happy if Jisung wouldn't stop acting so sad and seeking attention - of course, that is going to make Hyunjin feel bad for him. Is that what Jisung wants? Jeongin was enraged with Jisung's stupid behavior. 

"If Jisung is bothering you, just tell me, has he been bothering you or said anything hurtful to you?" Jeongin asks.

"He has said nothing to me, nor has he hurt me, I'm sure I'm the one that had hurt him," Hyunjin sighs, "I'm the one that ended our friendship."

"It's not your fault, plus you don't need him anyway."

"But I miss being friends with him and I miss talking to him like how we used to." Jeongin wasn't so happy with that answer it was making so much rage bubble up inside of him. Why couldn't Jisung just...disappear? 

"I understand how you feel," Jeongin lies, "Maybe it will take some time for you two to get used to not being friends with each other anymore."

"You're right, but I wish to be friends with him again. I know it's making you feel uncomfortable that the two of us are being a little too touchy, but can't I still be friends with him? I'll not lay a finger on him, nor will I let him do the same." Jeongin tried to hold in the tremendous amounts of anger that was filling him up on the inside. He doesn't want Jisung near Hyunjin or even talk to Hyunjin, and that's it.

"Hyunjin, I know you're upset, but Jisung seems to have forgotten about you and turned his head towards the others, mostly towards Seungmin and Felix. He looks happy to be with them." Hyunjin wasn't happy to hear that but knew that was true, especially with what Jisung had said last night. _There is no need to worry. I'll be honest, I am upset with how things ended up between us, but it is all okay Hyunjin, I think I can endure it and forgot the times we were friends._

"So Hyunjin, don't be sad. Remember you have me, and I care about you and love you so much." Jeongin cups Hyunjin's cheeks, and presses his lips against the taller males soft ones. "Jisung seems like he doesn't mind not being friends with you anymore and you shouldn't miss him, that'll only make you feel sadder. Focus on the positives, yeah?"

"Okay," Hyunjin replies, his lips were curled into a little smile. _Now_ Jeongin felt much better. 

"Wanna watch something together before we sleep?" Hyunjin happily nods. Jeongin reaches for his laptop and logged onto his Netflix account. "What would you like to watch?"

"I'm okay with anything." 

Once Jeongin selected a movie, the two shifted so that they were laid on their stomach and watched a movie together. When that movie ended, Hyunjin chose the next movie, and halfway into it, Jeongin glanced at Hyunjin who had fallen asleep. He softly chuckled, got off his bed, and closed his laptop before placing it on his desk. He looked at Hyunjin once more and smiled at his peaceful sleeping face before pulling the blanket over him.

Jeongin reaches into his pocket and pulls out his phone. Although he was satisfied that Hyunjin believed his words, Jeongin still was pissed off at Jisung for being so annoying, he deserved a little lesson. He adds Seungmin and Felix into a new group chat and sends them a long text with a smirk on his face. He knows them well enough to determine that Felix is super gullible and Seungmin likes justice. He couldn't wait until tomorrow. 

He places his phone on his desk and snuggles into bed, pressing himself closer to Hyunjin. Sooner or later Hyunjin was going to be all _his_. 


	11. Enclosed

He had awoken at around seven, his first class of the day is going to start right at 10:30, and he had almost three extra hours to sleep. As much as he wanted to stay in the warmth of his bed, he still got out of his bed and yawned before walking straight towards his closet to get dressed. He put on a comfortable outfit, and to top it off, he pulled on his favorite pastel blue hoodie, grabbed his backpack, and headed out of his room. 

The reason why he wanted to go early wasn't for the breakfast offered in the cafeteria, it was delicious and all but the only actual reason why he intended to head early was that he wanted to see Jisung. He knows he always sees his pretty face and heart-catching smile, but he just felt like being around him more, especially since there was a turn of events recently and Jisung was hiding something. Minho felt the need to help him somehow, and bring that smile back to his face, he didn't know how he would do it, but it wouldn't hurt to try.

Before leaving his apartment, Minho made sure to fill the bowls with cat food and water for his cats before bidding them goodbye. 

When he reached campus, he walked through the pavement, and in the corner of his eyes he spots familiar blonde hair, feeling that it could be Jisung, he looked that direction and his mouth fell open. _What the fuck?_ He wanted to be happy, he really did. Jisung was right there, the person whom Minho desperately wanted to see, but there was one problem: Why the hell was he sleeping on the bench? 

Minho reached for his phone and checked the time. The time read 7:47 AM; isn't it a little too early to be sleeping outside in front of the university campus on a fucking bench? What was the occasion? Two thoughts crossed his mind; either Jisung was kicked out of his own dorm by Hyunjin, or he must have willingly left. Poor thing - Minho just wanted to pull him into a hug. 

He walked over to the bench and sat down next to Jisung who was sleeping so peacefully. He was hugging himself, and his head was slightly cocked to the side. _Cute_ , Minho thinks, liking how beautiful Jisung looked even when he is sleeping. He wanted to wake him up and ask why he was sleeping on the bench, but he chose to let him sleep - he must be so stressed or something. 

Maybe now was the time he could take a quick nap as well. Liking that idea, Minho leaned back against the bench and shut his eyes. The drowsiness picked up pretty fast surprisingly. He was sure he could wake up on his own, at least before Jisung wakes up. 

After what seemed like a few quick minutes, he had awoken to something poking against his arm, he ignores it, just wanting to go back to sleep again. He feels it again and decided to ignore it again. 

"Minho Hyung?" He hears Jisung say in a soft tone, and Minho immediately opened his eyes and noticed that his head was resting against Jisung's arm. How did he end up like this? He sat upright and stared at Jisung who was looking at him - seemingly expecting something, Minho didn't know what Jisung was thinking at the moment, but his expression didn't look all too good. 

"Ah, good morning there Jisung-ah," Minho says and then yawns afterward, he noticed Jisung's expression relax. "May I ask why you were asleep on this bench? Do you not like your bed or something?" 

"I just felt like sleeping here," Jisung shrugs, and then stands up.

"On the bench?" Minho questions and stands up as well. "I don't know how you can sleep on that, my ass hurts so much." He rubs his butt to prove his point, which only made Jisung giggle. "So, are you going to go to the cafeteria?" Minho steps a little closer to the younger who nodded as a response and turned towards the building. "Okay then." 

When the two reached the table, Jisung immediately froze in his steps causing Minho to bump into him from behind. He could sense some unease coming off of Jisung, and he steps next to him and observes his face, he looked perplexed. What was he puzzled about? Minho looks at where Jisung was staring and he felt slight unease as well. Felix, Seungmin, and Jeongin were staring at the two of them, their expressions looked dark - to Minho, it didn't seem like they were mad, they looked _bothered_. 

"Anything wrong? Is it my face?" Minho asks and swipes at his fringe, "I hope I don't look too bad."

"No, nothing's wrong," Felix responds and he eyed Jisung weirdly; the tone of his voice sounded a little off, the cheerfulness was long gone, he sounded like he was annoyed about something. Minho turned his gaze towards Hyunjin who was looking right at Felix, the look on the tall male's face showed that he was clueless. 

"Good morning Minho Hyung!" Jeongin said in his usual cheery tone. That liveliness in his voice brought a smile upon Minho's face, and all he wanted to do was gawk at how adorable he looked when he seemed so happy. Minho shook away those thoughts, he had to think about the appearances on their faces just seconds ago, it wasn't so nice. "How are you doing?" 

"I'm doing great actually, just was a little confused," Minho answers, "I hope there isn't a bug crawling on my face that made you guys look at me in such a funny way." 

"Um, so are you going to sit down or what, hyung?" Seungmin asks in kind of an impatient and rude way, which made Minho narrow his eyes at him. How could he be so rude and speak like that to him? Minho decided to brush it off and laughed as a response, there was only a tad bit of humor in his laughter, it was much more of what he would call a forced laugh to cover up his exasperation. 

"You guys don't look so happy," Minho resumes speaking, "Are you sure there isn't anything wrong?"

"What do you mean? There is nothing wrong, and I'm sure you're overthinking," Seungmin replies, "Just morning you know." That sounded a little convincing enough, sometimes Minho could get a little moody in the morning as well.

"Minho Hyung, I'll get going now, I'll be heading to the café here," Jisung states and quickly walked away before Minho could even reply or ask if he could join him there. The four appeared to be holding something against Jisung, Minho just knows it. Why would Jisung just leave like that? 

"Are you sure nothing is going on? Jisung literally just walked away," Minho pointed out, "Maybe..." he looked at Hyunjin, "Is there something going on between you and Jisung? Are you avoiding him?" At that question, Hyunjin shifted uncomfortably in his seat and quickly glanced at Jeongin before he returned his eyes towards Minho. Those movements alone practically answered Minho's question, but he didn't want to jump into conclusions just yet. He needed a direct answer. 

"They are not avoiding each other," Jeongin replies and blinks up at Minho innocently, "Maybe he wanted coffee or something. The café at this school is pretty nice, I myself enjoy going there." He laughs.

 _True_ , Minho thinks and turns to look at the entrance. He then walked over to an empty seat next to Felix and sat down. He rested his cheek against his fist, something just didn't seem right. If Jisung wanted to enjoy coffee at the café then why did he leave so urgently? Why did he look so uncomfortable the moment he approached this table? Why didn't he sit down and talk to them happily? Why didn't they great Jisung happily? Why didn't _Jisung_ greet them happily? Why did they sound like they were hiding something? 

_Why? Why? Why?_ All those questions Minho was asking himself in his mind was making energy drain right out of his brain. 

He knows one thing for sure. Even if he is overthinking, even if he may be wrong - he knows something is fucking going on. 

"Can I tell you something funny?" Minho asked randomly, and they all looked at him baffled - probably because he started speaking out of nowhere. He removes his palm from his cheek and lets his forearm rest against the table. "Someone is really upset, and is turning towards you guys." 

"How is that funny?" Seungmin asked. "Shouldn't that be something sad?" S _ave the questions for later you little smart fu-_

"It's funny because," Minho stands up, "The people he is turning towards is treating him like shit and hiding things from him."

"Is this about Jisung? Because if it is, then I'm not sure what you are trying to imply! There is nothing wrong!" Felix replies defensively, and that was enough to add some negative points to Minho's friendship with him - his liking for him plummeting slowly. 

"Then why is he avoiding Hyunjin? Then why did he walk away like that? Clearly something is going on, and none of you want to step up and speak the truth," Minho says coldly, "The truth will set you free~"

"Oh, how bold of you to assume we aren't saying the truth," Seungmin scoffs, "Think things through before jumping into conclusions, _hyung_." Minho just wanted to strangle that bastard right now.

"Because you aren't saying the truth, and I'm not stupid," Minho rolls his eyes, "If you don't want to say anything about it then fine, I won't push any further. Time to go find Jisungie~" He turns around and heads right out of the cafeteria. If they weren't going to say anything, he has no choice but to work on finding things out himself.

\--------

At the café Jisung was swirling his straw around his cup of iced coffee, he hadn't taken a single sip yet as he was questioning why they were giving him such cold looks. He hadn't said anything to any of them besides Hyunjin and Jeongin, they had a reason to give him that look but Seungmin and Felix? Why were they doing the same? Those cold eyes sent an alert to his mind, telling him to just leave, and here he was at the café having a difficult time understanding what was going on. 

"Hey." Jisung looks up and smiles to see Minho. He felt that he needed to be accompanied here, and he was more than delighted to see Minho just inches away. "May I join you here?"

"Yeah, of course," Jisung says and gestures to the seat right across from him. Minho sits down, and they both meet each other's eyes. "If you're going to ask about earlier, I don't want to talk about it. I'm sorry."

"That's okay, I just want to make sure you are okay. Are you feeling okay?" Minho asks. 

"No," Jisung purses his lips and began to trace patterns against the plastic cup, "I don't feel okay."

"Everything will be okay Jisung, I know it's not something I should say because I don't know what exactly is going on, but just know that there is someone right across from you that will do anything to help you and is willing to help you feel better," Minho says, and smiles so warmly. Jisung tears his gaze away from him and looks right at his iced coffee. 

"Thank you," Jisung mutters, returning his gaze to Minho's eyes. The softness in the other's eyes was pushing in some kind of assurance in him. Minho is such a good person and friend. "Oh and, the looks they were giving...it wasn't directed towards you, it was towards me. There isn't any reason for them to do that to you. So don't feel hurt."

"There isn't any reason for them to do that to you as well, Jisung," Minho responds, his smile fading. "And you too, don't feel hurt, okay? Just keep smiling." Jisung could feel tears fill his eyes, he tried to hide it by lowering his head but that only made the tears pepper onto the table. Minho sighs but doesn't do anything. Jisung didn't want him to do anything, the slight silence was okay enough. "It'll all be okay, and I will always be here with you."

Jisung meets Minho's eyes again, "Thank you, I will try to endure." 

"Anytime," Minho's smile grew wider, and his eyes were squished into crescents. He looked so beautiful when he smiled genuinely, it was so bright like the shining stars in the night sky. "Just hang in there, and come to me if anything's wrong, yeah?"

Jisung nods as a reply and thinks about what to say. He was very thankful, but he had already thanked him. He appreciated Minho's concern for him. 

"I think you're my third favorite person," Jisung finally manages to stay after a few seconds of brief thinking. He watched how Minho's eyes slightly widened, his smile faltered a bit, but it was still there, and he blinked several times, probably wondering if whatever that was let out of Jisung's mouth was true. 

" _Third?_ " Minho pouts, Jisung nods and chuckled. "Not my favorite place, but I guess at least I'm closer to first." Now it was Jisung who had widened his eyes. Minho wanted to be his first favorite person? He shakes the thoughts away and picked up his iced coffee, he stared at the bottom seeing how the ice had already begun melting. He placed his lips onto the straw anyway and drunk up the coffee - not wanting to waste it. Minho placed his cheek against his palm and stared down at the table. 

Once the time was growing close to 9:30, Jisung stood up, and Minho did the same as well and looked at Jisung expectantly. Whichever class Jisung was going to head to, Minho wanted to follow along. His first-class started at 10:30, but he wanted to stick around with Jisung. His first-class couldn't be too bad, would it? 

"What's your class?" Minho quickly asked before Jisung stepped away.

"Art," he simply responded. Yeah, it didn't sound so bad, all he had to do was draw and paint stuff, right?

"Okay, I'll join you in that class, even though my first class starts at 10: 30," Minho laughs.

"Why did you even come to school early?" Jisung laughs, "You should've slept in a little more." Minho didn't want to tell him that the only reason why he had come to school early was to see _him._

"Nah, I didn't feel like sleeping in," Minho replies, although sleeping in a few extra hours would have been a great blessing to his mind and body, especially since university classes were super hectic. But why need sleep when he had the little sunshine he was following right after, heading to his art class? 

Jisung's art class wasn't so bad - although Minho was slightly annoyed by the way the professor was looking at him weirdly. Minho had to brush that stare away. Maybe that stare would stop once he actually _enrolls_ in the art class. 

Minho of course, chose to sit next to Jisung, who else did he even want to sit next to? He observed how focused Jisung was in his work, and would get frustrated when his artwork wouldn't turn out the way he wanted it to turn out. It was just something basic - the professor wanted them to draw an imaginary place, and Jisung had so far only sketched a circle. 

He turned his head toward the professor who was walking through the rows of tables, examining the student's artwork, Minho looked away and dropped his gaze down at his paper. He hadn't started drawing yet but decided to bullshit it through so that the professor doesn't pester him. He didn't even intend to enroll in this class, he didn't want to be graded for his horrible work. 

"I like your artwork..." The voice startled Minho a little, and he snapped his head upwards and looked at the professor who was looking at his artwork. He seemed to have shown interest in his work. "You're drawing is very interesting, is this a cat island?" Minho stared at his artwork and saw how he drew so many weird-looking cats because he couldn't draw. He also drew a person in the middle laying down on the grass (or more like sharp rushed strokes he created), the person he created was based on himself. 

"Yes, it's a place with so many cats, and I'm the one lying in the grass," Minho explained, "I just really love cats, and that had inspired me to draw myself with so many cats." 

"Wow, so creative," the professor praised. Minho smiled proudly, loving how his basic rushed drawing received a compliment. "But make sure to take time on your work, it looks flat. Try adding some shading as it would add more depth and make your work stand out. Practice shading, and try using reference photos for the cats. There are a lot of video tutorials that could guide you." Minho's smile faltered at that, but he accepted the critique anyway - even though he lowkey wanted to stab the professor with the tip of the art pencil he borrowed from Jisung. 

"Han jisung, you're improving." The professor had moved on to Jisung and was looking at his work meticulously. Minho peered at Jisung's work and his mouth formed an 'o' Jisung was actually very good at art, and his sketch so far looked so nice, but why was it giving out such dark vibes? He seemingly had drawn a field, with what looked like a jar in the middle, and inside that bowl was a person, it looked unfinished but something in his heart was telling him that it was what Jisung was feeling right now, or that was the emotions the blonde was experiencing on the inside. "Mind if you tell me what this imaginary place is?" 

"A person in the middle of nowhere and enclosed in a jar," Jisung minimally explains, his voice sounded so wary. 

"Ah, okay, you're doing great!" The professor says encouragingly and moved onto the other table. 

"Like my artwork?" Minho asks Jisung and points down at his paper. 

"Yeah, it's so cute," he giggled, "It resembles you a lot." 

"Thank you," Minho smiled, "I hope my cats like it as well." 

\--------

His psychology class didn't turn out that bad today. Time flew by really fast but it was mainly because Minho's mind was occupied by Jisung and only Jisung. The blonde was his top priority, and he needed to crack this mystery behind Jisung's frown. Was Jisung feeling trapped? Stuck? Those were the only thoughts that were coming across his mind, it was that artwork Jisung had created that made those thoughts accumulate in Minho's mind. Was it the others who made him feel that way? Most likely. There would be no other reason for Jisung's mood to descend into the darkness. He needed to do something about it, he didn't want Jisung to feel that way, he didn't want Jisung to feel like he was holding on alone. 

There was one thing Minho could conclude - it all has to do with Hyunjin. Everything was well before Minho's absence and all this chaos had all flooded in while he was taking a recovery break from school. 

Jisung and Hyunjin were good before, acting so happy, acting like _friends_. He was skeptical of their words, they sounded too defensive _way_ too defensive, especially Seungmin and Felix. Their eyes said a lot - much more than what they spoke. There was something in them that was telling Minho that they were turned against Jisung. 

"This is so fucking frustrating!" Minho grumbles out and kicks at nothing in front of him. A chuckle coming from not too far away made blood rush to his ears.

"What's frustrating?" Ten walked in front of him and stopped. "Not being able to dance for a month? Chill out about that, it won't affect you that much."

"Yes, that's frustrating. It is affecting me, don't you know how badly I want to show up at the club today? Don't you know how badly I want to continue participating in the dance team because I'm one of the captains? I hate being so stupid," Minho says angrily. Ten placed his hand onto Minho's shoulder and squeezed it lightly.

"Things happen Minho, sometimes it can get out of your control, but this dance ban of yours _will_ be over. Hang in there."

"Okay Hyung," Minho replies, "But that's one thing I'm frustrated about, there is something else that is going on, and I want to fix it." 

"What is it?"

"I'd rather not say right now," Minho replies and bites onto his bottom lip anxiously. 

"That's okay," Ten pats him, "If you ever want to talk about whatever it is, just text me."

"Thank you," Minho smiled. Ten waved goodbye and walked away. Minho sighs once again, before heading straight towards the cafeteria. When he approached the table, he frowns. Everyone was there except for Jisung, his eyes skimmed at each face at the table. Seungmin was absorbed into his book, Chan was listening to music, Felix and Changbin were talking to each other (more like flirting with each other) and Jeongin was talking to Hyunjin. Everything seemed normal besides Jisung not being here. Minho wondered where he was, should he ask? 

When Hyunjin turned his head towards Minho, Minho looked at him darkly, trying to shoot coldness at him and he was triggered when Hyunjin smiled at him. "Hi hyung." Acting as nothing had happened. 

"Do you know where Jisung is?" Minho asks, not wanting to be nice to him anymore. Hwang Hyunjin; the cause of Jisung's silent sufferings, the cause of the poor blonde to cry alone, and keep in the pain. 

"Actually he-"

"No, we didn't see him," Jeongin responds cutting Hyunjin off; Minho kind of was taken aback, what made him cut Hyunjin off like that? How could he do that? Minho was beginning to grow pissed at him, why was Jeongin fucking behaving this way? What happened to this little fuck? He was getting so annoying, and who gives him the right to speak over Hyunjin. Minho expected better of Jeongin, he thought Jeongin was a sweet little angel. He couldn't help but feel so disappointed in him. Maybe he was just aggravated? But that doesn't mean Hyunjin didn't have the right to finish his words.

"I was asking Hyunjin, Jeongin-ah," Minho tried to remain calm even though his mood was itching at him to explode. 

"What do you want to hear? You want the answer you want to hear? That we saw Jisung? Because we didn't." Despite that menacing gaze he was giving Minho, his voice still sounded collected and patient. 

"Let Hyunjin _finish_ ," Minho says again, demandingly. 

"No, Jisung didn't come here yet, we really don't know where he is," Hyunjin immediately responded. Minho licked his bottom lip trying to diminish his irritation.

"Is everything good?" Chan asked, he had taken off his earphones and was eyeing Minho with concern. 

"Yes," Minho simply replies and headed over to an empty seat beside Changbin who was talking to his potential love of his life. Jeongin and Hyunjin were hiding something, they were a little too obvious. He quietly remained seated and rested his chin over his cold fingers - rethinking everything, connecting the difficult pieces. 

After a minute, a plan struck him in the head. It could work, or it couldn't work, but he felt so proud of coming up with a smart plan, involving his little friend...

"Changbin-ah," He quietly says, and tapped him on the arm, pulling him away from his conversation with Felix. Felix picked up his carton of milk and began sipping away at the drink.

"What's up Minho?" 

"I need to talk you in private," Minho replies in a whisper, audible enough for Changbin to hear. Changbin nods in understanding and the two stood up from their spots. 

Before walking away from the table, Minho spared one last glance directed at Jeongin who was also looking right at him with suspicion painted in his eyes. Minho slightly regretted looking at him, he knew it would only raise more suspicion in the younger, but he could care less. If Jeongin was going to act so irritating now, he could all he wanted. Minho wasn't going to stop with his plans. 

"So, what do you need to talk about?" Changbin asked once the two were in a slightly empty hallway, only a few students would pass by. 

"Jisung," Minho replies. Changbin raised an eyebrow. "Jeongin, Hyunjin, Seungmin, and even Felix are acting differently towards him now." That statement made Changbin's expression contort into concern.

"What do you mean?"

"I don't know how to explain, but it seems like they have something against him now. I don't know the full story myself as well, it seems like their little dilemma happened while I was absent."

"Truthfully, I've noticed something as well, Jisung has changed a little, he is much more upset and reserved these days. He would be so quiet in music production class, I even pointed it out during lunch this one day. That day Jisung wasn't eating his lunch properly, he visibly looked distressed, Chan asked if he was okay and Jisung said that he needed some time alone and he left. Felix even pointed out that someone was acting like a bitch to him," Changbin explains. _Someone was acting like a bitch to Jisung?_ Minho questioned to himself and furrowed his eyebrows. That someone deserved a fist to their face. If he finds out who this person is, he is going to tear them apart and ruin their fucking life. 

"Felix and Seungmin know something then, Jisung might have told them what was going on," Minho asserted. The anger was clawing at him on the inside, and he tried his best to keep his cool. 

"Most likely," Changbin replies. "Could it be something between Jisung and Hyunjin? The two aren't around each other a lot, they don't talk to each other and avoid each other. One day they were both loud and talking to each other a lot and now it's as if none of that existed." Minho was glad Changbin noticed something between Hyunjin and Jisung as well, and Minho didn't have to tell himself that he might be overthinking all of this.

"It could be..." Minho nods, "Changbin you are pretty close to Felix right?" Changbin raised a brow. 

"Yes, why?"

"That's why, you, my friend," Minho pats him on the shoulder, "Need to help me with my plan."

"Am I going to commit a crime? Because I do not want to end up getting in trouble."

"No, you idiot, it's something so simple." Minho proceeds to explain the plan. 

\--------

Changbin felt completely nervous and felt like he was a bad person for agreeing to the plan. When he sat down at the cafeteria table, he observed each of them, and his eyes stopped at Hyunjin who looked so blissful like nothing had happened. He rips his gaze away from the black-haired male, as he wasn't any of his importance at the moment and looked at the pretty male next to him instead, who was eating his lunch.

"Hey, Felix," Changbin speaks, Felix looked right at him, still chewing at his food. "Can I talk to you privately after you finish eating? It's something really important." Felix swallowed his food and nodded as a reply.

When the younger was done eating, the two left the table and headed out of the cafeteria and reached somewhere quiet and private. 

"What did you need to talk about?" Felix asked.

"It's about Hyunjin and Jisung, I noticed that they were acting weird around each other," Changbin explained, and Felix frowned. "You wouldn't mind telling me what going on?" 

"Actually, Jisung had hurt Hyunjin." Changbin was taken aback. Minho's plan was so clever, Felix would definitely spill secrets to Changbin easily because he was close to Felix. "That's why they are like that."

"What do you mean? Jisung wouldn't do such a thing?"

"Jeongin said so," Felix shrugged, "Jisung was acting up because Hyunjin was with Jeongin, and he feels jealous." Jisung jealous? That was unbelievable, Jisung didn't seem like the type that would be jealous about things like that. He was such a little softie and put others before himself. Maybe that was what Changbin was seeing on the outside, could Jisung be a different type of person on the inside? Beyond what Changbin sees?

"Are you sure?" Changbin questions, not believing Felix's words yet.

"I have proof," Felix reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone. He handed the phone over to Changbin. "Jeongin explained the situation to Seungmin and me." 

Changbin looked down at the text message, it was very long and when he read through it, it felt as if a knife stabbed him right in the heart. 

Innie [9:56 PM]: Hey guys, I know you two may be worried about what is going on with Hyunjin and Jisung, so I'll explain what is going on. When Hyunjin told Jisung that he was dating me, Jisung reacted in a bad way and said that he didn't want to be friends with him anymore. It seems like he was jealous. He had said so many horrible things to Hyunjin and hurt his feelings. That is why Jisung is avoiding Hyunjin, even though Hyunjin had done nothing wrong. I was so shocked when Hyunjin told me about it. I'm sorry if we hadn't told you two earlier but that is why Jisung has been acting that way. He feels betrayed just because Hyunjin and I are dating, which explains that sad look on his face and his refusal to talk to Hyunjin. Don't tell anyone about this, and don't bring it up. Hyunjin and I would be happy if we can just let this all go and forget about Jisung's reaction. 

Seungmin [9:57 PM]: What the hell? I'm so sorry about that, I can't believe Jisung reacted that way! He has no right to hurt you two! I'm so disappointed in him. 

Felix [11:23 PM]: I'm so pissed. What the fuck is wrong with him?

"What the fuck..." Changbin mutters, "I can't believe this."

"That's how I felt. I couldn't believe I had thought that Hyunjin was at fault," Felix frowned. Changbin couldn't see Jisung the same way anymore. Jisung wasn't such a bright, nice, and sweet person. He was a damned monster that liked ruining people's moods. 

"Felix, is it okay if I take a picture of the text message so I can review it for later?" Changbin asks.

"Of course, I don't mind," Felix assures. Changbin takes out his phone and takes a clear picture of those messages before putting his phone back into his pocket and returned Felix's phone. 

"Thank you," Changbin smiled at him. 

"Is that all you wanted to talk about?" Felix asked, getting ready to walk away. 

"Yes, thank you," Changbin says and he noticed some kind of sadness flash before Felix's eyes before he turned around and started walking away. "Actually, I do!" He halted in his steps and turned to look at Changbin again. "I've been wanting to say this for a while now..." Changbin nervously looked down at his feet and he could sense Felix approaching him again. When he sees Felix's feet right across from his he immediately looks up. 

"What do you want to say?" Felix asked. Changbin stayed quiet for a little bit, too afraid to speak, Felix was waiting patiently for a response. 

"I like you, Felix," Changbin mutters out and feels his face heat up, "I like you a lot, and it's okay if you don't like me back, I just wanted to let you know..."

"Changbin," Felix speaks, Changbin waited for a rejection, feeling that Felix didn't feel the same way. "I like you too." A wide smile crept onto Changbin's lips and Felix giggled. He pulled Changbin into a tight embrace, and Changbin wrapped his arms around Felix's waist as well. He was so happy to finally let his feelings out, and was so happy that Felix felt the same way for him.

\--------

Minho thought his plan was extremely good, he felt like a literal genius even though it was just a simple plan. The reason why he had asked Changbin for help was that he knew Felix and Changbin loved each other and would reveal anything to each other, plus knowing Felix well, Minho knew that younger would spill anything to his favorite person. 

He was glad Changbin had agreed with the plan and straightaway headed back into the cafeteria to play with the plan. 

Minho decided to hang out in the same spot and wait until Changbin returns with some information. He was ready to hear who had hurt Jisung and Minho was also ready to hurt that person with his own two hands. 

"You need to tell me what's going on, you look so sad and I can try helping you." Minho was popped out of his thoughts upon the familiarity of that voice. He could always recognize that annoying voice. When he glanced the direction the voice came from, it made rage spike inside of him. Yeah, it definitely was Daekhwa looking down at Jisung with worry. The blonde was seated on the second to last step on the stairway. Minho walked their direction but still kept his distance from them not wanting them to know he was nearby and snooping. 

"Everything's okay, Daekhwa. I can handle it all on my own, that's what I've been doing for days," Jisung sighs. Those words hit Minho in the heart, and he wanted to comfort the blonde. He continues to stare, and when he sees Jisung quickly wipe away his tears, Minho felt his legs pull him closer to them. As much as he wanted to remain undercover, his legs were betraying him. 

Daekhwa noticed him approaching, and the expression his face contorted from worry to pure annoyance. Minho stopped right in front of Jisung and knelt in front of him and ruffled his hair. And when he heard Daekhwa let out an exasperated sigh, Minho could tell he had triggered him.

Minho examined Jisung's face, he looked like a complete mess, not that he wanted to be rude. 

"Everything's alright?" Minho asked Jisung nodded as a response, _of course_. Minho knew that was a lie, but he decided to move on. "I'll believe you, for now."

"Hey, Minho, what are you even doing here? Can't you give us some privacy? We were talking," Daekhwa breaks into the conversation and Minho gave him a menacing look, trying to scare him away but Daekhwa wasn't budging and he looked like a ravenous beast getting ready to attack. Was Minho going to feel scared? Nope. He was ready to beat the shit out of him if Daekhwa did anything stupid. 

"He is my friend. I can't comfort a friend?" 

"Well, he is my _boyfriend_ ," Daekhwa snaps, "And I want you to leave, so fuck off. Jisung and I are talking and you are ruining the mood."

"How is my presence here ruining the mood? I'm trying to improve Jisung's mood and you here are making such a big fuss about it," Minho steps closer to Daekhwa, his eyes showing threat. "You're doing a very bad job at comforting him you know."

"Thank you for your concern, Lee-Min-ho. I will try to improve myself. Now, will you just fuck off and go dance or something. Oh, wait you can't because you injured your fucking head foolishly," Daekhwa mocks, "Is that why you are out of your mind? Maybe you should get your brain checked." _Oh no the fuck he didn't._ Minho clenched his fists at his sides and that action alone alerted Jisung immediately and he stood up from his spot. 

"Maybe you should get your mouth cleaned, you're spitting bullshit, stop acting so damn stupid," Minho snaps back, "Or else your ankle is going to be what I injure." 

"Stop fighting you two!" Jisung finally speaks up and stands in front of Daekhwa. It hurt Minho a little because Jisung was seemingly protecting Daekhwa but he decided to let that hurt emotion go, Minho wanted to annoy Daekhwa as much as he could and break him apart. 

"Jisung, would you like to hang out with me after school today?" Minho smiles at Jisung lovingly, and he saw Daekhwa tense at that. 

"He is going to be with me after school," Daekhwa says. 

"I am?" Jisung says, looking very puzzled. Minho eyed Daekhwa and smirked at him.

"I called first dibs," Minho laughs at Daekhwa derisively and then returns his eyes to Jisung's beautiful brown ones. "Looks like you're free afterschool today. So, would you like to hang out?"

"I'll think about it," Jisung simply replies. That wasn't the answer Minho wanted, but he was fine with it. At least it wasn't straight up a no. 

"Are you happy now Minho? If that is what you wanted to ask, leave now," Daekhwa scoffs. 

"Yeah, I'm _very_ happy," Minho replies and gives Daekhwa a smug look, the coin-heads eyes were burning with infuriation. "Chao~" Minho waves and leaves them. 

\--------

Minho was laying down on the couch, his arm over his head, and a few snacks were by his side. His phone was resting right on his stomach, he was waiting for any sound to come out of his phone, hoping that eventually, Jisung would text him his response. Just as he was about to reach for an unopened bag of chips, his phone made the blissful sound Minho wanted to hear so badly and he immediately grabbed it and checked the name that appeared on the screen. 'Changbin.' Minho knew what it was going to be about. 

Changbin [4:03 PM]: You know how during lunch we've talked about Jisung's shift in mood? And how we've assumed that something was going on between him and Hyunjin? There is nothing going on, and we were just overthinking things. So there is no need to worry, Felix explained it and it's understandable. Jisung is pretty distant because he is dealing with his own things and Hyunjin is spending a lot of time with his boyfriend of course. 

Minho sighed after reading that text, turned off his phone, and placed it onto the coffee table right in front of him. He was jumping into conclusions after all, but what things were Jisung dealing with that reduced the joyfulness within him? Why had Felix said that someone was acting like a bitch to him but now claimed nothing was wrong? 

His phone ringing popped him out of his thoughts, and he picked it up and smiled widely at the name that appeared at the screen - Jisung.

"Hello!" Minho says enthusiastically. 

"Hi, um...let's hang out," Jisung says, and even though Minho couldn't see his face, he knew Jisung was feeling shy right now. 

"Great! I'll pick you up at your dorm and take you to my favorite place. You'll love it!" Minho claimed, his happiness was filling inside of him so quickly that he felt like he was going to burst. 

"Okay," Jisung laughed, "See you!" 

Minho hung up, and jumped from his couch and did his little dance of happiness. He was so happy to get to hang out with Jisung, Minho had a few plans in mind and wanted to get to know Jisung even better. He wanted to be the best he could be for him, anything to get Jisung's eyes on him, anything to have the blonde like him instead of Daekhwa even if it meant that he had to do certain things. 


	12. Uninvited Friend

Bringing Jisung to the café Minho loved so much was such a great idea, Jisung seemed to have fallen in love with this place; he was looking around in complete awe and his eyes were practically twinkling from such a pleasant sight. Minho wished Jisung could look at him like how he looked at this café - he was a pleasant sight too. The pictures he takes of himself never lied. 

Jisung had chosen the seats not too far away from the desert booth and was currently enjoying the cheesecake he got from there, there were a lot of different flavors of cheesecake offered but the one he had chosen amongst them all was the chocolate cheesecake. That booth was Minho's favorite due to the various options of dessert. They both ordered the buffet option so they could eat as much dessert as they wanted although that wasn't going to be so healthy. 

While they ate, Minho would occasionally sneak glances at Jisung (or at least look at him when he wasn't aware.) Whenever he'd glance at him, his lips would fail him and turn into a smile. He didn't want to be creepy or anything, but Jisung had that effect on him. He didn't know why Jisung's face was making him smile, but it did, and he couldn't repress it. The time he didn't want to smile was the time his lips would do the opposite, much to his disliking. 

He hoped Jisung wouldn't look at him and just enjoy that cheesecake he was eating right now with so much happiness. Minho wished Jisung could be happy all the time like how he was now just by eating that cake. He wondered if he should buy him cheesecake more often. Could that bring in that happiness to him? 

At this point, he knew he was just gawking at the blonde eating diligently and was smiling so cutely as he chewed. Stopping himself from staring wasn't going to be so easy, Jisung was just too eye-catching, he caught Minho's eyes, and sadly once he finished his cheesecake, he caught Minho staring. Averting his gaze could have been a wise option, but he was too late. Numbers couldn't calculate the amount of embarrassment Minho had felt in himself, he was so, so embarrassed - Jisung had looked at him at the wrong time. 

Anxiousness was starting to develop inside of him, exceeding his embarrassment. He believed he made a fool out of himself and questioned if Jisung was creeped out by him. Will he leave? (Minho hoped not) Will he be disgusted? (Again, he hoped not.)

However, when Jisung smiled, the dark assumptions faded away - bringing in such a huge relief to Minho, he was so glad Jisung hadn't reacted negatively. Minho softly laughs, joyful of the fact that Jisung was smiling so beautifully, it is what Minho would call a special smile, a smile that brings such huge comfort and warmth to his always icy cold heart. 

"You look really nice in that hoodie, pastel colors suit you really well," Jisung pointed out. Although that compliment came out of nowhere, Minho ate that compliment up quickly as if he was deprived of love from others - maybe he was. That heart-melting compliment did a better job of satisfying him, it was much more pleasant and sweet than the frosted brownie he had eaten minutes ago. _Jisung loves me in pastel colors, noted;_ Minho thought to himself giddily. He was going to write this in his notebook later for review. 

"I do?" Minho replies, only to keep the conversation going. Although the silent eating was nice, talking to Jisung and getting to know him even better would be much nicer. He feels like he has a chance with him. He needed faith in order to attract what he wanted. He wants Jisung, and there is nothing more he wants ( maybe another cat or two.)

"Yeah," Jisung nods, "I hope this doesn't sound weird, but it makes you look so adorable. You look like blue cotton candy." _Noted_. 

He decided that now was the time to show his charms, he could do that. Showing off his charms was something he felt that he was good at, a lot of people thought he was charming, although he knew he could _occasionall_ y be an ass. At least that changed, and he was glad Jisung didn't hate his guts for being such an asshole to him. 

"I think," He pulls off his pastel blue colored hoodie, stands up, walked over to Jisungs seat, and puts it on Jisung, who surprisingly let him. "It looks good on you." Jisung blinked up at him, probably perplexed. Minho once again felt anxiousness arise in him. Was that too awkward? But when Jisung giggled, Minho felt ease and returned to his seat. "Tell me about Daekhwa, how is he like?" That question was enough to cause Jisung to be confused. 

"Why this all of a sudden?" Jisung asked. Minho regretted asking but he needed to know a few things about that rat he just wanted to burn, crush his bones and make him cry. He wanted to know what Jisung liked in him, why was Daekhwa the chosen one? But he wasn't going to tell Jisung exactly those things. 

"I want to know if that _handsome_ boyfriend of yours is treating you nicely, I, Lee Minho, your friend; wants to make sure your relationship with him is going well," Minho forces out. He didn't think Daekhwa was handsome at all - well he is, rats could be handsome but that is rare. 

Jisung actually described his boyfriend pretty well. Each adjective let out of those pretty pink lips that Daekhwa probably kissed made Minho's self-esteem decline little by little. He had said so many good things about Daekhwa, making that silver-haired doofus seem like a perfect boyfriend. 

Thinking that he didn't meet those standards, Minho was starting to believe he wasn't good enough and needed to be perfect. That was what Daekhwa was in Jisung eyes - a perfect boyfriend, who was honest, caring, and understanding. He couldn't think about any positive traits of himself besides being handsome and charming. And that was enough to make him deem that he was such a show-off who would brag about himself. 

"Minho, are you okay?" Jisung asked with concern laced in his voice.

"Yeah, I am, why?" Minho lies. He didn't want Jisung to know that he was sad because of how perfect Daekhwa was and that he thought of himself as trash. 

"Then why are you crying?" Minho widened his eyes at that question and touched his cheeks to confirm if he was actually crying, and when he felt the warm tears against his fingertips, he sighed.

He quickly wiped away the tears. Minho was so busy thinking about Daekhwa that he didn't even realize he was crying because of _that_. 

"No, it's just that I love this place so much, it makes me cry. I cry every time I come here," Minho lies and puts on a smile to make his words convincing enough. Jisung shakes his head and laughs. 

"I love it here as well."

After their little cafe hangout, Minho dropped Jisung off at his dorm, and bid him goodbye. He watched the blonde entered the building safely, and once Jisung was away from his sight, Minho drove back to his apartment.

Other than greeting his cats, the first thing he did was go straight to the bathroom and take a warm shower. It helped with his stress...a little. He spent that whole time thinking about Daekhwa and his personality. 

When he was done, he sat down at his desk, opened his notebook, and flipped to the next empty page and wrote down Daekhwa's name and started listing things. Things like: Daekhwa is handsome, kind, considerate, good listener, good at giving advice, honest. Right underneath those things he wrote: I am none of those things and I look good in pastel colors. He re-read everything he wrote and let out a miserable sigh. Daekhwa's personality was just so fucking perfect - although Minho thought that rat could be a jerk to him, it was fair, Minho was also a jerk to him. He wished someone like Daekhwa didn't exist. But, Minho knew how to fix it. He was going to try to be like Daekhwa, even if it would take so much effort. 

\--------

The morning went the same for Jisung, he woke up early when it was pointless, glanced to his side to see if Hyunjin was asleep and then he'd get out of bed, and get dressed. As usual, he headed to campus early, _way_ too early, and sat down at the same bench. He would usually just play music and fall asleep there but today was different, his loud thoughts were preventing him from sleeping so instead he stared at the grass. He thought about how much things had changed between him and Hyunjin, and honestly, he wanted to go back to when they were good friends. No one understood Jisung like how Hyunjin did. 

He also thought about how Seungmin and Felix were acting differently to him as well, and their gazes at him were so cold it made his insides freeze up. 

"I'm glad you're awake and didn't fall asleep on that pesky bench," Minho says, bringing Jisung away from his thoughts, "They should consider placing around comfortable benches right?" A comforting presence, exactly what Jisung needed. He was very happy to see Minho right in front of him smiling. 

"Yeah, I agree," Jisung laughs and stands up. 

"It's so weird of you to be out here pretty early, why do you even leave your dorm early?" Minho questions.

"Just felt like it," Jisung shrugs, "Mornings are nice."

"Not when you stay up all night studying for physics in order to bring up that failing grade," Minho sighs, "If I can't dance for a month, can I not study for a month? It would hurt my brain again."

"You wouldn't want to fall way more behind, do you?" 

"No, I guess not," Minho laughs, "To the cafeteria, we go?" Jisung nods.

Jisung hoped things would be different than how things were yesterday. He didn't want to see cold expressions, instead, he wanted them to greet him with a smile, even if it is fake so that he didn't have to feel so ashamed in front of Minho. Well, at least his hopes were met a little...? They didn't give him cold looks, they didn't even _look_ at him. Their eyes instantly landed on Minho, and they greeted him so vibrantly, their voices were full of enthusiasm. Minho smiled and greeted them back, and took a spot next to Seungmin. Jisung chose to sit next to Minho since he didn't want to sit next to Hyunjin. 

"Hey Minho, since tomorrow is a Saturday, would you like to hang out with us? We will be going to the arcade! Changbin and Chan will be going as well," Felix says. Something inside Jisung's stomach twisted, and he felt such an unbearable amount of pain in his heart. He told himself to let it go, he told himself that he could just enjoy time alone, he told himself that it was all okay, but the pain collecting inside of him was denying all of those things and he could feel his eyes sting. He didn't want to cry in front of them, but his eyes let out tears anyway. He wished they wouldn't see, but in his peripheral vision, he noticed Hyunjin staring right at him. 

"Jisung do you want to come too?" Hyunjin asked. Jisung needed to refuse that offer because it seemed as if they didn't even want him to hang out with them. He wasn't invited at first. 

"No," Jisung replies meekly, but still audible enough for them to hear. He felt fingers brush against his arm lightly, and he looked to his side and saw Minho looking at him with so much sympathy in his eyes. Minho then turned his head and looked at the others. 

"Sorry I can't make it, I have plans tomorrow. I hope you guys have so much fun!" Minho says enthusiastically for them. Jisung knew Minho said that out of pity. 

"Aw, that's too bad, we can do it Sunday if you'd like?" Seungmin smiles, "You don't have plans that day do you?" 

"No, I'm good, I don't like the arcade anyway," Minho shrugs. 

"We can do another activity instead," Seungmin insisted, "We don't have to-"

"I said no!" Minho raises his voice, making them all taken aback. He realizes that he scared them and gives them an apologetic look, "I'm so sorry. You guys enjoy, I'm not a big fan of fun, I think I still need some rest before being super active again." Minho points at his head to prove his point. Jisung found that kind of funny. 

"Aw, get well soon," Jeongin says with pity and looks at Minho with sadness in his eyes.

"Thank you," Minho smiles at him, "I'll get going now." He stands up, looks at Jisung, smiled at him, and walked away. His departure made Jisung feel nervous, sitting here was pointless and since he didn't want to feel uneasy anymore, he stood up as well and left to head to his math class early. 

\--------

Music production class was going great so far, other than Changbin acting so weird. He used to be so talkative and would always tease Chan but now he was being quiet. Chan noticed it as well, but he didn't say anything about it as he was busy finalizing their tracks. When it appeared that he was finished with the work, he turned to the two of them and gave them a wide bright smile, displaying how happy and excited he was.

"Finally published it all! I hope people would like this masterpiece made entirely by us!" Chan clasped his hands together. His dimpled-smile made Jisung smile along, and he gave him a thumbs up. After about a second, Chan's smile faded a little when his eyes landed on Changbin, "Um, you good there?" Jisung turned his head and saw Changbin rubbing his pointer finger at the surface of the table, looking vaguely bored. He stopped his movements at the question, and simply gazed at Chan. 

Jisung found it a little unsettling seeing Changbin's poker expression.

"Yeah, I'm good, just tired," He replies so blandly. "But yeah, I'm excited about it too." 

When class ended, Changbin was pretty quick to leave, today wasn't a great day for him apparently. But why was he leaving so fast? Didn't he always exit the class with Chan? They lived together. Jisung blamed himself for it, had he done something wrong? 

He grabbed his backpack and put it on. However, before he got to turn and leave, Chan placed his hand on Jisungs shoulder, stopping him from going.

"Jisung, talk to me, are you okay?" Chan asks. 

"You should ask Changbin that, he doesn't look like he was well," Jisung replies, dodging Chans question. Chan rolled his eyes. 

"Jisung-ah," he sighs, "I know, and I'll ask him later, but right now, this is about _you_. You are making me worried."

"I didn't ask you to be worried hyung."

"Why can't I be worried? Is it a crime to feel so worried about you? Look, you haven't been your usual self for days now, and I don't want to see you suffering alone like that. You don't necessarily need to tell me anything, that's all up to you, but maybe saying something or letting it out can help you feel much better."

"Hyung, I'm okay, this is how I am," Jisung tries to persuade, "I'll get going now." 

"Well...um....if you ever need someone to talk to, you can always come to me," Chan says. Jisung was appreciative of Chan's kindness, but he just didn't want to tell him anything. Chan confronting Jeongin and Hyunjin was something he didn't want happening. He could deal with things on his own and didn't need any sorts of support currently. 

"Thank you hyung," Jisung replies and exits out of the music production room. He notices Changbin leaning against the wall by the door, probably waiting for Chan. Changbin looked right at Jisung, pursed his lips, and averted his gaze elsewhere. It stung Jisung in the heart, but he let it slide - thinking Changbin was in a bad mood or something and leaves quickly.

When Jisung stepped inside his dorm, he saw Hyunjin standing there, looking right at him, as if he wanted to say something to him. Jisung ignored him, tossed his backpack by his bed, and walked over to his closet to find something to wear for his date with Daekhwa which would occur in about three hours. He chooses his outfit, placed it onto his chair, and then ambled to his bed and laid down. He reached into his pocket for his phone and began browsing. 

"Jisung," Hyunjin says in a tone that showed his remorse. He could be just as hurt, Jisung was being too stingy to him, and was closing him away. Jisung considered himself as petty, and he couldn't suppress that attitude. "I'm sorry about this morning, we didn't mean to make you feel that way. You can come along if you want-"

"Forget it, I'm fine," Jisung replies sternly, although angry tears were collecting in his eyes. They never made him feel this terrible and left out. "You have fun wherever you go with them. I want to spend my time indoors."

"Jisung I'm sorry about everything, I really am," Hyunjin continues to speak pleadingly. Jisung pulls his gaze away from his phone and looks right at Hyunjin's tear-filled eyes. He wanted to run to him and tell him it was okay, but his mind was keeping him still, telling him to let Hyunjin cry and let him suffer. "It was so horrible of me to turn away from you for Jeongin, it makes me so sad to see you like this, I didn't mean to hurt yo-"

"Hah, so you're apologizing out of pity?" Jisung laughs sarcastically then sits upright and glared at the older. Tears were flowing down Hyunjin's cheeks at such a rapid pace and it was enough to break Jisung's heart. 

Hyunjin opens his mouth to respond to Jisung's statement, but then he immediately closes it and looks down at the floor. That was enough to answer Jisung's question. Hyunjin apologized because he felt bad for him, and didn't want to see him sad. How was that going to make Jisung feel any better? He felt so disapointed. "Hyunjin, you focus on yourself and your friends, and I will focus on myself and my sadness. There is no need for you to waste your time pitying me. I'm fine all alone."

Jisung wasn't fine all alone. That was a complete lie. 

"They are also your friends, they care about you!" 

"Observe how they react to me! Then you'll know!" Jisung spat, "They probably hate me, just like how Jeongin hates me and even you hate me!" He stands up and heads towards the door. 

"I don't hate you Jisung! That is nonsense!"

Jisung turns around and looks at Hyunjin once more. "Are you sure about that?" Before Hyunjin got to answer, Jisung turned to the door again, opened it, and left their dorm quickly. He runs through the corridor and then storms down the stairway, all the way until he reached the main floor. He exited the building and decided to walk around for a bit. 

He didn't know how long he was walking around for, but it did feel like it was long enough. He reaches for his phone to check the time, but he was surprised not to see it in his pocket. Maybe it was on his bed? He runs all the way back to the building and then heads to his dorm. When he opened the door, the first thing he searched for was for his phone and yeah, it was right on his bed. He steps inside, closes the door behind him and walked over to his bed and picked up his phone. He checked the time and realizes he has two hours until the date. He looked over at Hyunjin, who was quietly working on school work. Jisung felt bad for yelling at him, it probably had crushed him.

"Hyunjin," He speaks sheepishly, ashamed from behaving that way. Hyunjin stops writing and looks right at Jisung. "I'm sorry for yelling at you like that."

"It's fine, I deserved it anyway," He sighed and returned to his work. 

Not knowing what to say, Jisung just sat down at his desk and opened up his laptop and started on his literature assignment to pass by the remaining time. He managed to get a little done, and had a little time left before it was 5 pm. 

\--------

This date was a special date. A date that had a soothing effect on a highly-strung Jisung, who not too long ago had faced what he would consider something painful to him. Holding hands with Daekhwa's warm ones helped ease the tension inside of him, and looking around the pleasant surroundings made his shame and hurt forgotten for now. 

"You seem to feel much better now," Daekhwa speaks, and Jisung turns his gaze from the trees to Daekhwa's soft gaze. "Are you enjoying this walk so far?" 

"Yeah, thank you, I'm not so stressed out anymore." Jisung smiles. Suddenly Daekhwa came to a halt, and turns to him, their hands still tangled together. He eyed him with worry, and Jisung waited for him to speak. He hoped that he wouldn't have to deal with another lecture about letting out his emotions, he had already heard that from Chan today and had enough of it. He just wanted some time to figure out things alone. 

"What's making you stressed out?" He asks, much to Jisung's remorse. 

"School," Jisung replies. 

"I'm sure there is more to it than that," Daekhwa raises a brow, "You've been like this for days."

"Nothing else is wrong, just stress, other than that I'm completely okay," Jisung lies right through his teeth. He wasn't okay. He was betrayed. And right now he didn't need counseling from Daekhwa, he just wanted to have a good time with him, a time without any worries, and just filled with joy. But the temporary happiness that came through him by looking at the calming surroundings seeped right out of his skin, leaving him to feel upset like he had felt when he left the dorm. 

"If you say so," Dakehwa replies and squeezes Jisung's hand gently, "Let's finish our walk and head somewhere to eat, yeah?" Jisung nods as a reply. 

They continued to walk through the grass and swung their arms as they did. Ahead of them was a person seated on the bench, and Jisung recognized it as Minho who was reading a book. Minho had also noticed, and he looked up from his book and waved at them with a smile on his face. Jisung was so happy to see him again today and was about to approach him, but Daekhwa tugged at his arm, keeping him from doing so. Confused, he turned his head to Daekhwa who had an emotionless look. "Minho is busy, I think it's best if we leave him alone." Jisung pouts a little and then nods in agreement. 

They were about to continue walking but stopped when Minho stood up from his spot on the bench and walked towards them, first he looked at Daekhwa and narrowed his eyes at him, and then he looked at Jisung and smiled at him, seemingly glad to see him as well. 

"Hey there," he speaks with glee. "Isn't the weather so nice? I love reading out here at the park." 

"Oh really? Okay, that's nice to hear," Daekhwa hastily replies, "Well nice seeing you here, and I hope it doesn't rain. You wouldn't want that book soaked, do you? Anyways, we have to go." Minho glares at Daekhwa, and then looks up at the clear sky and then back at Daekhwa.

"It won't rain you dumb-ass," Minho snaps. Jisung supposes that Minho hates Daekhwa, last time they fought like this too. 

"Move out of the way." With his free hand, Daekhwa pushes Minho aside, and walks away, pulling Jisung alone with him. 

"Fuck you! You belong in the sewers!" Minho yells out. That was harsh, and Jisung could tell Daekhwa was pissed because he was walking so fast. Minho had behaved maliciously, and although Jisung was glad Minho wasn't being mean to him anymore, he was disapointed with how he was being so rude to Daekhwa. 

Jisung turns his head so that he could see Minho, and he saw Minho throwing his book at a tree. Yeah, he and Daekhwa aren't so fond of each other. 

"Don't mind him, he has been such a huge jerk since last year," Daekhwa sighs, "I don't know how people like such a hot-head like him." 

"Oh."

\--------

It was a Saturday, a free day, kind of. Currently, Minho was trying to look for the beloved grey hoodie he had since high school. He looked around his closet and his fingers stopped against the purple bundle. He untied the knot, and there were a few clothes he had kept in there, and among those clothes was his grey hoodie. Smiling in victory, he took it out and pulled it on.

Today was an important day. He had so many assignments to do, but he needed to be generous to his head injury, so he decided to ignore his assignments, and forget about them for the rest of this day. He was too special to feel stressed out and wanted to enjoy his primary plan today, which was far more important than those pesky assignments. Sunday could freely be a day filled with stress and probably more procrastination. 

Right now he had a new mission, it wasn't something he should consider too serious, but it was. He wasn't lying when he said that he had plans today.

What was the plan he had today? Well, since Minho had searched around his closet for his grey hoodie which he found; he noticed that he didn't have much pastel-colored clothing and since he wanted to satisfy Jisung as much as he could and make the blonde love him, he wanted to buy pastel-colored clothing. His closet was mainly filled with dark or neutral shades of clothing, which was pretty much how his personality was like. He needed pastel clothes, so this is why his big plan today was to go to the mall. 

He did say that he wanted to rest because of his injury, but that was because he wanted to find an excuse to avoid going to the arcade. First of all, he didn't want to go because he wanted to shop, and second, they rudely didn't include Jisung, and that pissed Minho off completely. 

After a long drive to the mall, Minho immediately headed to the nearest clothing store and began hunting for any kind of pastel clothing in the men's section. Since it was spring, he was sure there will be some pastel themed stuff. He found a few clothes and tried them on, and choose the ones he liked the best before taking them to the register.

Approximately two hours later, he was carrying two shopping bags filled with clothes and this stressful adventure had increased his appetite. Picking clothes takes a lot of time and intense decision making. 

He headed towards a restaurant and ordered some food before sitting down at one of those round white tables. He placed his bags beneath his seat and took out his phone to play Neko Atusme, a peaceful and cute game.

"Felix are you seriously hungry again?" Minho choked on his saliva upon the said name. _Felix?_ No, that couldn't be true, maybe that was another person named Felix.

"I'm hungry too!" Another person whined, and that sounded exactly like Changbin. Minho turned off his phone and looked right at them and immediately widened his eyes. _Oh shit_. He was screwed. All of them were there, following right after Changbin and Felix who were heading right towards this restaurant. Minho thought they were going to the fucking arcade. What the hell were they even doing here?

"Number 235!" Minho cautiously dashed to the front counter and grabbed his food and raced back to his spot and began eating his warm food. He hoped they didn't notice him.

"Look! Is that Minho?" He hears Jeongin say. _Well fuck_. He looked at his half-eaten burger and mumbled an 'I'm sorry' before placing it back onto his tray right next to his french fries. He was about to stand up, but all of them sat down at this table with him, he couldn't flee now. But at least his food could end up in a better place now, and not in the trash.

"Hey Minho, it's nice seeing you here!" Chan says with a smile.

"Yeah, it's nice seeing you here too," Minho says and picks up his burger again and takes a large bite.

"I thought you said you had plans today?" Felix says. Minho wanted to snap back at him, and even though he started disliking him, he didn't want to be rude just yet.

"I planned to go shopping today, and here I am, taking a nice break before I head back home," Minho replies, "I thought you guys were going to go to the arcade?"

"We will be going after we shop around too," Seungmin responded, "You can join us too."

"No, I'm good," Minho shrugs, and stuffs a lot of fries in his mouth and begins to chew it fast. All he just want to do was eat quickly and get the hell away from them. 

As he crammed down his food hurriedly, he listened to them talking about what they'd do at the arcade and it made him feel like joining them. But the thing was that they didn't invite Jisung, and Minho felt that the arcade would be much more fun with Jisung there, so Minho decided that he'd rather return to his apartment and relax. 

"Be careful, you'll choke," Chan warns, "Eat slowly." Minho gives him a thumb up to signal that he was fine and swallowed the remainder of his food. He picked up his tray dumped the wrappers in the trashbin and placed the tray on the top. He walked back to the table and picked up his shopping bags.

"Minho, you've been acting pretty weird lately, what's up?" Chan asked. 

Oh how badly Minho wanted to spill everything and talk about how _they_ didn't invite Jisung and wanted to tell Chan and Changbin about how those four freshmen had apparently been mistreating him, but he holds in that urge. Minho wants to be a good human being, and let them have their little fun today and figure things out himself before running to them with accusations. 

"Aren't we all weird?" Minho laughs, "Have a good time! And see you all on Monday!" He says quickly and scurries off from the disasters. He couldn't wait until Monday and see how Jisung would react to his new style. 


	13. Uncomfortably Cute

"Ah, fuck..." Minho mumbled as he stared at himself in the mirror. 

He thought he looked completely weird. He was wearing blue denim overalls with a pastel pink sweater, and right on top of his head was a pink beret. Although the outfit matched with the pretty spring season and environment, the pink opposed his usual dark and cool style. He didn't feel like a Lee Minho anymore, he felt like he had replaced himself with someone else. Currently, he looks so fresh, so innocent...so Jisung-like. Could this be why Jisung loved Minho in pastel colors? 

Although this selection of clothes may satisfy Jisung's standards, Minho wasn't quite yet accustomed to wearing such a cutesy style of clothing from head to toe. It felt foreign on him. 

Well, If Jisung likes pastel on him, Minho was just going to push himself to continue his day almost looking like a unicorn. He isn't content with it, but as long as Jisung likes it Minho was going to be fine. He hopes. 

Minho inhales deeply and contorted his embarrassed expression to a one of forced confidence. 

"Time to be a new Lee Minho," Minho speaks to himself, his stare not leaving his reflection. "Whether I like it or not." He turned around and headed out of his room. 

When he reached the university campus, his thoughts of Jisung being at the bench again were correct, there sat the blonde right on what Minho would call a 'pesky' bench. He was staring down at his red-colored converse, somehow matching with the white shirt and black jeans he was wearing. He looked bored and sad, but mostly bored. 

Minho disapproves of the way Jisung always comes to campus early for no reason, but he never directly mentioned it to the blonde, nor scold him. He had only asked him why he risked his morning sleep to just foolishly get to the bench. 

Jisung is making himself to do something like that. Minho wasn't going to deny that fact. 

Why had he never done this when things were okay? Like when he and Hyunjin laughed and talked to each other regularly, showing off their powerful friendship that shined warmly like the sun?

They weren't shining anymore though. Their warm light is gone, causing coldness and darkness to reveal itself. The coldness was Hyunjin; a breeze that stung against Jisung's skin, causing him pain. The darkness was Jisung; someone who was sitting around surrounded with dejection, thinking there is no more light when there was always a _certain_ light waiting to be seen by him. 

Minho told himself to not jump into conclusions, maybe there can be many scenarios beyond what he sees? But, he had already concluded everything. He has every single bit of faith in his beliefs, his heart was telling him that Hyunjin did hurt Jisung. 

It came time to interrogate, that was the only way to prove his assumptions. 

"Hello again," Minho says as he approaches the blonde. Jisung looked up at him and widened his eyes, Minho expected that reaction. 

"Your outfit..." Jisung murmurs as he scans him up and down, examining Minho's sudden new style. "You look so different today."

"Oh."

"But in a good way," Jisung smiles, "You look so cute."

"Ah, I'm glad you like it," Minho rubs the back of his neck shyly and sits down beside the blonde, "Do you like my newish style?"

"Yeah," Jisung responds, "It was just surprising to see you in a completely different scheme of colors, different from your dark clothes but it does look nice!" This was exactly what Minho was hoping to hear. Such a relief. 

"Thanks." Minho felt like interrogating him now, he wanted to hear the truthful words come out of Jisung's mouth, but maybe later. This cheerful moment was too good to ruin with a question Jisung may avoid answering. "Instead of going to the cafeteria today do you just want to eat breakfast at the school's café? I like their options for food better." 

"Yeah, sure," Jisung replies and already gets up, and Minho did the same as well. 

\--------

In his morning Physics class, time was dragging by _so_ slowly. It had always been like that, Minho hated physics, and the physics professor obviously disliked him too, because Minho wouldn't often pay attention. 

Today, time was dragging by twice as slow, spiking Minho's level of rage that he was taming down by chewing onto his bottom lip. 

It felt like time was going against him and was picking on him - doing it's best to torment his mind. He could ignore those feelings, he just needed to do something fun. But what fun could he do in this shitty physics class? There was nothing much to do besides sleep, but how was that even possible when the professor was maddening? 

What's worse was that Minho was seated kind of near the front, he wanted to be a good student and raise his horrible eye-torturing grade. But sitting here was an awful mistake. When he _tried_ to ignore his thoughts and pay attention to the professor reviewing something about friction, he would feel stares penetrating onto his back. He gets it, he is completely different today, but does that mean students had to fucking stare at him like he was the lesson the professor was teaching?

"Hey," the student next to him whispers, he turned his head to Gahyeon, a rather pretty student who was so good at physics. "I like your new style." 

"Thanks," Minho simply replies and then turns his head back at the professor. _No more compliments, ugh_. Being in the center of attention wasn't what he asked for, but it was all his fault anyway. He forced himself into a very interesting new style that he just wanted to rip off of himself. 

"What influenced this new style of yours?" She speaks again.

"Myself, nothing else, I can't try something new can't I?" 

"Lee Minho!" The professor yells, startling Minho, "When will you ever consider paying attention?" _Never,_ he resentfully thinks to himself.

"I _was_ paying attention," _you old hag -_ he wanted to add that in, but didn't want to bring himself into any more trouble. 

"Being a distraction to a fellow student isn't what I'd call paying attention," he says, "Pay attention to the lessons. The only reason why you are even failing is that you don't bother improving your habits." Did he just expose his grade to the whole damn class like that? This was unacceptable and Minho just wanted to throw his pink beret at him. 

"Well screw you," he mumbles and looks down at his papers, and the professor continues to teach. 

Luckily, Gahyeon, the physics genius hasn't asked him any more questions and Minho was very thankful for that - he didn't want the professor scolding him in front of the class again, not that it made him embarrassed, but it just irritated him. He would drop this class, but sadly it's a class he feels like he may need, although he is planning on majoring in dance and will have mostly dance-related classes next year. 

"Okay, make sure to complete all the equations for your homework, and I will be posting today's notes online," the professor says at the end of class and Minho hurriedly packed up his belongings. He was so ready to get out of this hell of a class. 

A double-tap on his shoulder made him pause though, and he turned his head towards Gahyeon. He gazed at her pretty face waiting for her to speak, and the smile that crept up made Minho understand what she was going to talk about. 

"I see you are having a hard time in physics." 

"You _heard_ that from the professor," Minho deadpans and she laughs, "What do you need to ask me?" 

"I wanted to ask for you number," Gahyeon answers, Minho wasn't going to deny the fact that she was entirely sweet, respectful and smart, and her smile was adorable. But the way she was hitting up on him was just too annoying and Minho wanted to do was decline. "I want to get to know you better, and I can even help you with physics, I'm doing well in this class." 

"I'm glad to hear that you are doing well in this class, but I'm capable of doing well too, I just don't try, sorry," Minho swiftly turned around and quickly stormed out of class to head to his next class, it was his favorite class even though he couldn't dance. 

When he entered his next class, he brushed past dance teacher Park Jinyoung who was looking at him with such an amused expression on his face and sat down against the wall, because he couldn't do anything else for the upcoming days. The urge to dance slowly started to descend and he was okay with sitting down watching others dance. 

"Well, well, well, look at what we have here," the dance teacher walked towards him, "Lee Minho is dressed so cutely, what's the occasion?"

"There is no occasion," Minho responds, "Just felt like dressing like this." The dance teacher doesn't reply and just chuckles before walking towards the front of the practice room and instructed the students to do some stretches before they review the choreo. Minho watched them stretch their limbs, and then his eyes wandered off towards Hyunjin who was talking to Felix while laughing.

Minho didn't think of anything else but the possibilities of things that Hyunjin could've done to Jisung. He knows he hurt him, but in what way? 

"Hello Minho," Hyunjin says as he pants. It was currently their recovery break time and both Felix and Hyunjin sat down in front of Minho. He didn't like them that much anymore, they lost some of his respect after their attitude towards Jisung, yet that didn't refrain Minho from telling himself to just be kind to the youngers. 

"Hello, you guys did great," Minho compliments. 

"Thank you, Hyung!" Felix chirps with happiness.

"Hyunjin, can I talk to you after school?" Minho asks, "It's about something important." 

Both Felix and Hyunjin exchanged each other glances. 

"Okay," Hyunjin sighs. 

\--------

When Minho sat down with his friends at the lunch table, all of them except Hyunjin and Felix gave him weird looks. He knows he dressed all different, but those looks on their faces were just washing him with embarrassment. 

His eyes stopped at Changbin's face, he looked like he was going to burst out into laughter. Minho didn't want to hear it but knowing Changbin, he will indeed laugh. 

"Aww~What happened to the grim reaper?" He laughs and pointed directly at Minho, "Now he looks like a cute little fairy. Nice beret you got there! Who's adorable? Minho is~" 

"Is he really Lee Minho? Or it this his nice twin?" Chan cackles. Minho rolls his eyes and sat down beside Chan. 

"Oh just shut up already, I'm wearing new styles of clothes what's the big deal?"

"The big deal is that you're wearing completely different colors, different than the dark colors you sometimes often wear. By any chance were you forced to wear those? You don't look happy with what you are wearing right now," Chan pointed out. 

"It was my own decision," Minho shrugs, "Nothing was forced." That was a lie, he forced himself to wear pastel clothes to make Jisung like him better. Was it working? Minho wasn't sure, but Jisung did look happy with the new style. 

Minho doubted that he was going to continue this style. He was certain that this wasn't going to end up being his permanent style, he preferred his usual style, that not only did he love, but found himself feeling comfy in. 

But if this pastel style could score Jisung, then why not keep it on? 

"Minho Hyung, even if those clothes make you look so different, you still look great," Jeongin speaks, "I never thought you'd be the type to wear those kinds of clothes, especially something pink."

"Here I am now, wearing something not Lee Minho type," Minho bluntly replies. 

"Forget his clothes, I have good news to share!" Changbin says loudly, making them all settle their eyes right on Changbin who had on such a prideful expression on his face. Next to him, Felix looked very bashful, but he was smiling. "Felix and I are officially a couple~!" 

Seungmin choked on his water.

"Since when?" Chan asks. He appeared surprised and happy, a typical reaction whenever something unexpected but good happens. 

"Since yesterday, I confessed three days ago and yesterday," Changbin slings an arm around Felix, "He asked me to be his boyfriend."

"Finally, I was waiting for you two to happen," Minho sighs and then pulls on a smile. 

"You've been rooting this whole time?" Felix raises a brow.

"You can say that," Minho flattens his mouth. 

"Congratulations to the new Changlix couple!" Hyunjin says cheerfully. 

\--------

After the final class of the day, Minho rushed right out of the building and headed towards the front field that Hyunjin texted him to meet him at. As he walked, he spotted Hyunjin leaning against the tree, and in front of him was Jeongin. The two seemed to be in a conversation, and based on the look on Hyunjin's face Minho could sense that he was uncomfortable. 

"Why does he even want to meet you?" Minho could hear Jeongin say to Hyunjin as he neared them. 

"I'm not sure, he just said that he had something important to say," Hyunjin shrugs.

"That's right," Minho approaches them and stops next to Jeongin. He eyed him warily, "Any concerns?"

"No," Jeongin replies darkly. Minho stared at him for a few more seconds and then looks at Hyunjin. 

"I would like to talk to Hyunjin in private," Minho says, Jeongin sighs at that, he sounded unamused with what Minho had just declared. He didn't expect a negative reaction from someone like Jeongin. 

"Okay then, see you Hyunjin," Jeongin steps closer to Hyunjin, grips onto his chin, and presses a kiss on his lips. Then he turns towards Minho and narrowed his eyes at him. That gaze shooting from his eyes was heavily frightening and Minho's stomach was fed with unease. Why was Jeongin being like this? Minho wondered what he had done wrong. Was it because he was taking Hyunjin away for a moment?

That gaze showed threat. Totally not Jeongin-like; it was as if all the innocence, sweetness and friendliness were all sucked away, and left behind a Jeongin Minho didn't know or didn't even understand. 

Once he silently turned away, Minho dropped his shoulders, feeling significant amounts of relief. "What's with him? He looked like he wanted to kill me." Minho settled his eyes on Hyunjin's face, the younger looked anxious. "Hyunjin? You okay?" 

"Where do you want to talk?" Hyunjin asks, evading from Minho's question, "Since you said that it's something important, should we talk somewhere else?"

"Tteokbokki place?" Minho asks, he was craving it for a while, "I'm super hungry." Hyunjin nods as a reply. "There is one not too far from campus, but I'll still need to drive us there." 

He led Hyunjin to his car and drove him to the said place. They settled down at one of the unoccupied tables and waited for the lady that took orders to arrive at their table. 

The two of them sat in complete silence; Minho would look at Hyunjin and then scan around this comfy place, and Hyunjin, on the other hand, would avoid Minho's gaze whenever possible and would just stare at the warm brown tones of the wall.

"Hello, what would you like to order?" The voice dragged Hyunjin and Minho from their thoughts.

"One tteokbokki please, and kimbap," Minho says. 

"Just one tteokbokki for me and water," Hyunjin says. The lady writes down the order and spares a glance at Minho. 

"I love the clothes you are wearing, such a pretty boy," She laughs. 

"Thank you, Ajumma," Minho replies and awkwardly shifts in his seat. He was grateful for receiving compliments, but this outfit was his worst nightmare. Though it was loose-fitting, it still felt like it was getting smaller and smaller on him and was tightening around his body making him feel uncomfortable and suffocated. He just wanted to rip the material away but he continued to hide those feelings with a smile on his face. 

"Your food will come in a few minutes," she smiles at them and turns away.

"Wow this outfit of yours is grabbing a lot of attention," Hyunjin pointed out. Minho rolls his eyes and lets out a rueful sigh. 

"Sadly."

"Sadly?" Hyunjin replies, sounding bewildered, "Why?"

"As you already know, I like Jisung. And a few days ago he said that pastel looks good on me, so yeah, I bought pastel clothes and am wearing them. It's been a long day today." Minho frowns, and Hyunjin face palmed himself. 

" _Minho Hyung_ , just because Jisung likes pastel colors on you doesn't mean you have to force yourself to put that on. He didn't ask you to, and you don't even have to go that far," Hyunjin lectures, "Wear what makes you feel comfortable."

"Yeah, sure," Minho replies blandly. "And speaking of Jisung, that's what I needed to talk to you about."

"Go on," Hyunjin replies bluntly, yet looked alert about it. 

"Things between the two of you aren't going right, am I right?"

"You've already asked that," he sighs. It was too early to be impatient, though it bubbled inside of him anyways and he was trying his best to contain himself. 

"I need an honest answer. I can literally feel so many things going on, even though I don't know exactly what's happening. What I do know for sure is that you, Jeongin, Seungmin, and Felix are behaving so differently around him, it obvious you guys are turned against him. What did he do wrong?" 

Hyunjin furrows his eyebrows at that, probably of confusion.

"You five need to talk things out, Jisung clearly isn't happy and the four of you are ignoring that and are letting him run loose with those emotions." 

Hyunjin was about to respond, but once their food arrived, the two of them instantly focused on that. 

As Minho ate, he thought about Hyunjin. Was he eventually going to tell him the truth? It wasn't unlikely but there is a significant chance that he would hold it all in and remain still as a large boulder - no matter how hard the waves pushed against him.

"Minho," Hyunjin speaks after he had swallowed his food. 

Minho rested his gaze right into Hyunjins eyes, the glistening brown orbs wasn't just a plain stare, there were emotions within the stare, emotions like guilt and sorrow. _Genuinity_ , Minho tells himself. He believes that the younger was planning on saying the truth. 

"Whatever you speculated, whatever you assumed, they were all right," Hyunjin says. _Finally_ , Minho thinks happily to himself. He will definitely be able to know everything and will no longer have to make assumptions. "It all started when Jeongin and I began dating. That night we confessed to each other, and he asked me for a favor. He asked me to consider his uncomfortableness with Jisung and the way we behave around each other. I was so shocked by that favor, but I did say that I'd do anything for him, so I thought about it. My thoughts led me to make the worst choice ever, I regret it so much. I told Jisung that we should just tone down our friendship, I thought he'd understand but he ended up being very upset. It was so stupid of me to even think that. Now here we are...no longer friends."

 _I fucking knew it_. Minho bitterly thinks to himself, this was all unbelievable for him and he was so pissed at Hyunjin. He had such damn nerves to dump Jisung like that, for fucking Jeongin. 

Minho sighs and opens his mouth to speak, but Hyunjin beat him to it. "I love Jisung, a lot. It was so painful to leave him like that and it hurt me so much to see him sad." Those words only made Minho feel much more disappointed in Hyunjin - if he loved Jisung why throw him away? 

"Hyunjin." Minho starts calmly. Hyunjin's eyes showed dismay, but they never left Minho's. "First of all, I'm very disapointed in you, but I can understand, you were indecisive with two choices and chose Jeongin as you cared about how he felt. You should've thought about Jisungs feelings too. Years of friendship? Don't you know years of a bond is hard to break, but when broken it hurts like hell? That's what Jisung feels right now, he feels extreme sadness from the loss of a friend he adored so much. I've seen plenty of fondness and strong friendship between you two earlier on. You need to think about things before stepping into action. Think about how others feel, put yourself in their shoes."

"I've already apologized to Jisung and told him that I was wrong, but he didn't forgive." 

Minho nods his head. "Apologizing is one thing. Change is what needs to take place, think about what Jisung wants."

"Okay."

"Second of all...it's not entirely your fault. It's also Jeongin's fault. He needs to know better, instead of acting all selfish and jealous."

"Jealous?"

"You don't know?" Minho laughs, Hyunjin was so oblivious. His statement made Minho realize what type of person Jeongin could be. If he didn't want Jisung around Hyunjin, that means he was either feeling insecure or jealous. "Why else is he behaving like that? I know him for a long time, we went to the same high school and he had always shown such an innocent side of himself, a side every one adored. But slowly I'm starting to see the true side of himself. I feel like his jealousy is making him..." He didn't want to say it, but Hyunjin's curious expression was pushing him. "Controlling and not completely confident in himself. He isn't making good decisions, and from the looks of it, he is wiping everything away from you." 

Minho watched how quick Hyunjin's expression was to change. Confusion to shock in a single snap of a second. 

"That isn't true, he loves me and I love him. Jisung and I were pretty touchy, and I am Jeongin's boyfriend, so I understand his jealousy." 

_Bastard. You wouldn't understand what I mean, would you?_

"The tteokbokki was so delicious wasn't it?" Minho says randomly, "Thank you for telling me the truth, It was nice talking to you today. Since I have things to take care of right when I get home, you wouldn't mind taking the bus would you?" 

"Not at all," Hyunjin responds, and he already stands up, "Get home safely."

"You too," Minho stands up, but before he walks away he decided to tell Hyunjin one more thing, "Think about what I said. Hyunjin." Minho headed out of the building and walks to his car that was parked along the curb. 

When he arrived at his apartment, he was quick to head to his room to grab his grey sweatpants and black colored shirt, and head to the shower. When he finished he sat down on the couch, he leaned back against the cushion and let out a sigh. Hyunjin was annoyingly delusional. Jeongin does love him, but he is pulling Hyunjin away and Hyunjin was okay with that? How pitiful. 

"So fucking stupid," Minho grumbles out and ruffles his hair letting out his rage. "Jeongin is such a piece of shit. But Hyunjin is much shittier. Or they could both be equals." A little mewl piqued his attention and he looked down beside him and he saw Dori curiously looking up at him. 

"You agree with me, don't you?" Minho smiles and brushed his fingers against Dori's soft fur. "Yang Jeongin and Hwang Hyunjin are pieces of shit." Again a little mewl, and it makes Minho chuckle. "What should I do about it, hm? Should I teach them a lesson for hurting Jisung?" Maybe that was the solution. Teach them what is right. 

\--------

Hyunjin stepped inside the dormitory building. The long bus ride was full of questioning and other random thoughts. He thought about what Minho had told him, and it shot a little something inside of him - probably realization? He was sure Jeongin wasn't wiping anything away? Hyunjin knows Jeongin loves him so much and he wouldn't do such a thing. Hurting Jisung was Hyunjin's own doing. Jeongin had nothing to do with it, all he felt was uncomfortableness and Hyunjin took it into consideration just like how Jeongin had asked for. 

When Hyunjin arrived at his floor, he was surprised to see Jeongin leaning against the wall by Hyunjin's dorm room door. He was staring straight at the wall in front of him but once he had seemed to sense Hyunjin's presence, he turned his head to him and stepped away from the wall.

"What brings you here?" Hyunjin says and walks towards him. 

Jeongin places his hands against Hyunjin's cheeks, his touch was icy cold causing a shiver to run all over his body. "Where did Minho take you?" Hyunjin blinks at that, why was he asking? 

"He just took me to a tteokbooki place, why?"

"What did you two talk about?"

"Nothing too important." Jeongin drops his hands from Hyunjin's cheeks, and Hyunjin noticed a flash of dissatisfaction appearing on Jeongin's face from that simple answer that he didn't seem to believe. 

"Then tell me what he said if it isn't so important." Jeongin frowns. Hyunjin didn't want to say anything; Minho had talked about Jisung and somethings about Jeongin as well, and Hyunjin had this gut feeling inside him telling him to not utter out a single word relating to any of those things. 

"We just talked about the good food served and about dance," Hyunjin mutters out, and looked down in guilt.

"You're lying." Hyunjin looks back up, meeting with the scary gaze. "You're bad at lying, and you look down whenever you feel nervous or anxious about something." 

"I'm not lying, we really did only talk about those things." That statement made Jeongin let out a scoff and he grabs Hyunjin's arm harshly making him wince and pushed him against the wall. He felt so sick now. 

Jeongin inches his face towards Hyunjin's and stares deeply into his eyes. It wasn't something so soft and sweet as usual, it was as if Hyunjin was viewing someone different. It was so scary. "Tell me the truth." 

Hyunjin was fragile, and easily breakable when he felt like he was under so much pressure. The pressure he was feeling was so extreme it was causing him to crack. He chooses to let himself break under that menacing stare, and with water filling his eyes he answers, "He asked me if things happened between Jisung and me, and I...uh...told him that we weren't friends anymore." 

"Of course Minho would! He has been leeching on Jisung for the past few days. So annoying," Jeongin growls, "Now why didn't you tell me the truth at first huh?" 

"I'm sorry..." Hyunjin mumbles out and looks down. He felt like throwing up - the guilt was sickening him. 

"You shouldn't lie to me, I trust you so much and you lying to me hurts." A sob escaped from Hyunjin's mouth. "You feel guilty about it don't you?" Hyunjin nods as a reply and wipes away his tears. "It's okay, I forgive you because I love you." He presses his lips against Hyunjin's and plants his hands onto his hips - pulling Hyunjin closer to his body as he deepened the kiss. The older shut his eyes, making the remaining water leave his eyes. 

When Jeongin pulls away, he wipes away the tears with his thumbs and looks at the door beside them. "Jisung is your roommate, right?" 

"Yeah." 

"Must be hard," Jeongin sighs. Hyunjin disagrees. "Can you sleep with me tonight?" Hyunjin couldn't refuse, he didn't want to upset Jeongin anymore, he wanted to be good for him, so he agrees and follows him. It was the least he could do for him. 

Jeongin smiles at him and holds onto Hyunjin's hand, "Let's go." 


	14. Only friends

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Smut at the beginning of the chapter 
> 
> I hope you enjoy this sweet chapter ^^

Jeongin gently pushed Hyunjin down onto the bed and gazed at him. The softness in his eyes made Hyunjin feel much more content, and he was less worried about the disappointment Jeongin had felt in him earlier. "Hyunjin, you know I care about you right?"

What's with him? Why was he asking that? Hyunjin didn't know why he was pointing that out, but he does know that Jeongin genuinely cared about him - a little too much actually. 

"Yeah, you do," Hyunjin replies and cracks a tiny smile to confirm it. 

Jeongin reaches out towards Hyunjin's hair and combs his fingers through the black strands, it soothed Hyunjin. Jeongin's touch, his presence, the calm expression on his face, it was all nice. 

"Can you do something for me?" Hyunjin swallows dryly and felt some apprehension bunch up inside of him. _No, no, no; please don't ask me to avoid anyone,_ Hyunjin thinks to himself in agony _._ He couldn't find himself ignoring more people, especially friends; he didn't want to do something that involved hurting anyone else. But what could he even do? He was stuck with two options - friends or Jeongin. They both were pretty dear to him, he valued both with all his life, but in this case, he could only choose one even if he wanted both. He wanted to reason with Jeongin but didn't want to see him become angry again. 

He could only hope for a favor that didn't involve cutting more people away. What if he isn't going to ask that? What if Jeongin wants him to do something else? It was unlikely, but there could be a slim chance. There was nothing he needed to worry about _yet_. 

"S-sure," Hyunjin mutters out. 

As if Jeongin sensed his discomfort, he sat down beside him on the bed and placed his hand on Hyunjin's thigh. That wasn't so soothing, it didn't tone down the battles going on in Hyunjin's mind. 

"Minho...he is kind of off," Jeongin starts. Yeah, Hyunjin's thoughts were correct, Jeongin wanted him to avoid a person; Minho. "Can you be careful around him? He isn't someone you should trust." 

Why wasn't Minho someone he should trust? Minho seemed like a person anyone could depend on. He cared deeply about Jisung and also cared about his feelings; Hyunjin thought Minho was a better friend to Jisung. 

Hyunjin couldn't deny the fact that he liked Minho a lot and looked up at him, not only because of his jaw-dropping skills in dance but also because he is interesting in a way. Even if his personality was confusing at times and all over the place, he was still a great person. 

"You seem to be questioning it," Jeongin cuts Hyunjin from his thoughts, "I understand you, Minho is in your dance class, he is also your friend, but he makes me very uneasy." He sighs. "I just don't want you to get hurt by him." 

Hyunjin sees the look of pain in Jeongin's eyes and the look of anxiousness. He was being honest right? 

_You should've thought about Jisung's feelings too_ ; Minho's words from yesterday made its way into his mind. When Hyunjin cut off Jisung, he was hurt. It was a horrible action, and Hyunjin didn't want to do the same for Minho. But that look in Jeongin's eyes was pulling his heart, that gaze made Hyunjin feel so guilty. It would all be okay, would it? Minho would understand, would he? 

_He is wiping everything away from you._

"Okay, I'll try to avoid him as much as I can," Hyunjin says; he had pushed away his thoughts and made his decision. Seemingly happy with that answer, Jeongin smiles and stands up from the mattress. He steps in front of Hyunjin, grabs Hyunjin's chin between his index finger and thumb, and lifts his face so that he was looking him in the eye. 

"You're so good for me," Jeongin says happily and presses his lips onto his. He then lowers down to Hyunjin's jaw and presses wet kisses there. He continues downwards and stops at his neck, he licks at the skin making Hyunjin let out a moan, and he shut his eyes and turned his head to the side, giving Jeongin access to more areas. 

Hyunjin's breathes came out in stutters, and he reached out and pressed his hands against Jeongin's waist for some type of support. 

The younger boy moves away a little and takes a second to admire how hot and beautiful Hyunjin looked right before his eyes. "You're so pretty." Hyunjin blushes. "Should we continue?" 

A single nod sends Jeongin back to Hyunjin's lips and they kiss so deeply. Hyunjin's hands head beneath Jeongin's shirt and he roams around the warm velvety skin, feeling the softness and smoothness. Next time he wanted to try to leave marks behind on Jeongin's skin. 

He pulls up Jeongin's shirt, and the younger had separated himself from Hyunjin's lips and let him take off his shirt. Once the fabric was gone, their lips joined again. After kissing so intensely and sloppily, Jeongin pushes Hyunjin down onto the mattress and hovers above him - supporting himself with only one arm while he uses his other hand to grasp onto Hyunjin's cheek. 

Hyunjin gazes up at him expectantly, and Jeongin smiles down at him beautifully. "Cute." He says before he presses a kiss against his nose and then his chin. He gets off the bed and pulls Hyunjin's shirt up so that his chest and tones stomach was on full display. The taller boy felt the coldness brush against his skin, but the cold sensation had all crumbled away upon Jeongin's burning gaze. 

"Wow..." He mutters out, amazed by the sight. His hands reached towards the taller boys abs and he begins to trace everywhere with the tips of his fingers. 

Even if his fingertips were cold, and even if shivers had run down Hyunjin's spine, the touches eventually did cause him to be filled with so much warmth and love. "You feel so good against my fingers." The said fingers left Hyunjin's skin and he pouted at the loss; the warmness felt like it was only temporarily there, and all he wanted was for Jeongin to touch him again, and not miss any centimeter of his skin. 

He returned though, but with his thumb and pointer finger pinching at his nipple. Hyunjin let out a gasp due to the sudden change of location Jeongin touched and the black-haired boy retracted his hand in panic and looked at Hyunjin in alarm. "Was that okay? Did I scare you?"

"No, you're fine," Hyunjin responds and outstretches his hand for Jeongin's hand. The younger seemingly understood and placed his hand onto Hyunjin's and he leads Jeongin's hand back to his nipple, "Go on." Hyunjin breathes out. "Touch me more, I love it when you feel me." 

Jeongin widens his eyes a little, but then his lips curl into a tiny smile and he pinches the hard pink bud once again and twists it making Hyunjin whimper as heat traveled down to his groin. 

"Jeongin..." He whines out. Jeongin withdraws his hand, and grabs Hyunjin's knee's and pulls them apart so that he was able to stand between them. His hands move to latch onto Hyunjin's hips and he dips down to press a kiss against his bulge. 

"Haah..." He pants out at the overwhelming amounts of pleasure he felt. Jeongin's face moves away from Hyunjin's throbbing tent and he hovers above Hyunjin again. His face was only inches away from Hyunjin's - their lips dead close.

Hyunjin looked into the sweetness and softness in Jeongin's eyes, and it made his heart drum intensely against his chest. 

"Hyunjin..." He presses his thumb against Hyunjin's bottom lip. Hyunjin could feel the beats of his heart pick up in pace. "Your lips, they are so perfect, whenever I look at them it's hard to refrain myself from kissing them. Everything about you is perfect." 

"Stop with the compliments," Hyunjin whines, "I haven't complimented you yet."

Jeongin's hand rested at Hyunjin's chest, heating that area by a lot. "Go ahead...say what you need to say."

"You fill me up with so much love. I love it when you touch me, and I love it when you kiss me. It makes me feel so good," Hyunjin says, and he smiles. Jeongin chuckles and kisses Hyunjin again before he trails down to his torso.

He unbuttons Hyunjin's jeans. "I love you with all my heart, Hyunjin. And nothing and _no one_ can get in the way of my love for you." That sentence sounded a little odd for Hyunjin, but the way Jeongin had said it so casually and sweetly made Hyunjin brush those thoughts away. Maybe Jeongin was just expressing how much he loves him? 

"I love you with all my-" Before he could finish his sentence, Jeongin presses his palm against Hyunjin's clothed length and started massaging it, causing Hyunin to moan loudly.

"What were you going to say?" Jeongin asks teasingly.

"I...I love y-you...you..." Hyunjin's mind was completely occupied with the feelings of arousal just by Jeongin palming him like that, he couldn't utter out a proper response.

Jeongin remains palming him at a much faster pace, and Hyunjin could feel himself getting closer. However, much to his dismay Jeongin moves away his hand - making Hyunjin whine at the loss. Jeongin hooks his finger's onto the hem of Hyunjin's jeans and pulls it down along with his boxer and tosses them aside. 

His hands then settle onto Hyunjin's hips again and he licks up onto the taller boy's length before he lightly swept his tongue against the slit. Hyunjin bucks his hip upward, the tip of his cock pressed against Jeongin's lip, the younger opened his mouth and sucked at the tip before he lowers his head and takes the entire length in his mouth. 

His mouth was so warm; Hyunjin liked how Jeongin's mouth felt against his rock-hard cock, it felt like a warm blanket. He grabs onto the bedsheets beneath him and tries to hold back a moan from the extreme feeling of pleasure. 

Jeongin progressed to a much quicker pace, and when he went back up, he swirls his tongue against the very tip of Hyunjin's cock and then moves back down quickly. 

"J-Jeongin, I-I'm..." quick desperate pants escaped from his mouth, and he whines as he releases into Jeongin's mouth. The younger pulls away, and swallowed up the fluid and lays down beside Hyunjin on the bed and faces him. 

"We're done?" Hyunjin says and juts out his bottom lip into a pout. "What about you?" Jeongin chuckles and ruffles Hyunin's hair playfully. 

"What about me?"

"Don't you want to...uh...fuck me?" Hyunjin embarrassedly asks. Jeongin brushes away the slightly sweat-soaked fringe from Hyunjin's forehead. 

"Hyunjin, we have classes tomorrow and I don't want you to walk around in pain, and I don't even have lube." 

"You can carry me around," Hyunjin suggests. 

"I would love to carry you, but seriously I don't want to hurt you okay? We can do it during the weekend, yeah?" Hyunjin nods. "Do you want to go shower first? Or should we shower together?" 

"Together sounds much better," Hyunjin smiles, and Jeongin laughs.

The next morning, Hyunjin woke up and looked at the beautiful morning light seeping through the thin white curtains. Dazedly, he stared at the curtains for a few seconds and once his mind cleared, he looked right at Jeongin's face; he was still sound asleep and Hyunjin smiled at how angelic and peaceful the younger looked when he is sleeping. He outstretched his hand towards Jeongin's cheek and hesitantly stroked it, that action caused Jeongin's eyes to flutter open and he blinked quickly and meet with Hyunjin's gaze. He smiled and sat up.

"You look so cute," Hyunjin comments and sits up as well.

"You look much cuter than I am, actually...you're gorgeous," Hyunjin's felt blood rush to his ears and he chuckles shyly. Jeongin smile grew wider, and he quickly pecked Hyunjin's cheek before he got out of bed. "Let's get changed."

The two of them changed - Hyunjin had to borrow clothes from Jeongin, not that the younger minded, Jeongin liked it when Hyunijn wore his clothes, and Hyunjin was happy that they fit just right on him. 

Hyunjin grasped onto Jeongin's hand, and the two headed out of the dorm together. 

\--------

"Jisung-ah~" Jisung heard a voice sing-song. Minho's voice. 

Jisung's lips immediately curved into a big smile and he spins around. There he sees Minho enthusiastically walking towards him. The blonde felt so much joy upon seeing Minho, who was wearing pastel colors again. With those clothes, Minho seemed like a completely different Minho, and Jisung wasn't used to it yet. He was used to the brunette just wearing dark colors a lot of the time. Had he grown tired of it and wanted to try out something new?

"You seem very happy today," Jisung starts, stating the obvious. Minho looked as happy as a puppy and it was just too adorable. He looked so good when he was happy, and Jisung also loves it when the older smiles. 

"Happy to see you," Minho says and pokes Jisungs cheek.

"You always see me," Jisung laughs.

"True," Minho smirks, "I'm _always_ happy to see you."

"Well, I'm _always_ happy to see you too."

Minho looks over Jisung's shoulder, right at the bench that was behind him and he frowns a little. "You didn't sleep on that bench, did you?" Jisung snorts at that. Of course, he had slept there a few minutes ago, and it was certainly going to be his last day he sleeps there, it was just too awkward. 

"You hate benches that much?" Jisung says, "And yes, I did sleep on that bench."

"Ah jeez, you shouldn't do that! You should sleep at your dorm, stop coming so early, just come an hour before class starts or something. What's with you not wanting to sleep in a comfortable bed huh?" Minho scolds. "Tell me why." 

"Minho Hyung, don't worry about it okay? It's my last time sleeping there, I'm not doing that anymore," Jisung responds assuringly, Minho sighs with relief. 

"Wait are you planning on sleeping on the grass or something?" Minho asks teasingly; Jisung smacks him playfully on the arm.

"No! I'll just stay in my dorm until eight like previously. I'll just have to deal with - " he immediately stopped speaking when he was about to announce Hyunjin's name. Jisung couldn't tell Minho that he had woke up early and planted himself on the bench just because he wanted to leave before Hyunjin wakes up. That was just a stupid reason to rest at the bench, and this was why he wasn't ever doing it again. 

"Deal with what?" Minho raises a brow.

"Things," Jisung concludes and Minho scoffs.

"Hm...okay. You know you can tell me whenever you aren't feeling great okay? I'm willing to help you anytime."

"Yeah, thanks." 

\--------

Deciding to ignore lunch for today, Minho headed towards the second floor and sat down at the top steps. He felt very upset, he figured out why Jisung hasn't come to sit with them at lunch - first, of course, it was because they were making him feel uneasy, but secondly, Jisung hung out with Daekhwa. He couldn't do anything about it, he couldn't just rip the two apart, that would lead to Jisung disliking him for being so mean again. That wasn't going to help Minho achieve his goal of having Jisung like him back. 

But what could he do? The feeling of loss was tugging viciously at his heart. He had thought Jisung could be all his, but it was all impossible. Jisung loves Daekhwa, it showed in his smile whenever the two would be around each other. A possible match made in heaven - Minho could describe with sorrow. 

Wearing pastel colors also didn't work, Jisung seemed to like it but wearing those colors alone couldn't do much. Not only did it make Minho feel completely lost of himself, but it also wasn't the only thing that was going to make Jisung love him back. He needed to do something much more; pastel colors are just a starter. He needed to appeal to Jisung, find ways to make Jisung love him instead. He wanted Jisung to get away from that sewer mule and look at Minho with love in his eyes. It was such a tremendous demand, but it could be met if he tried his hardest. 

How could he appeal to Jisung? There was one way. Be like his boyfriend. Minho took a mental note to read what he wrote in his notebook. If he couldn't practice dance for the next several days, he had to use all that time practicing becoming like Daekhwa - well, except for that silver-hair Minho thought looked horrid on that bastard. 

Could Jisung like silver hair or something? Minho hoped not. 

"Oh, look who it is if it isn't _Lee Minho_." _Speaking of the devil_. He was popped out of his thoughts by the stupid voice that belonged to that Daekhwa idiot, why did he hear it now of all times? He was just in the middle of coming up with things to change about himself. 

He looks up at him and in the corner of his eyes he sees Jisung right behind him and when Jisung looks at him too, he smiles cutely and waves at him. Minho smiles as well but when he shifts his gaze towards Daekhwa his smile almost instantly flattens. 

"Aw, you look sad~," The rat says in fake-pity, and Minho rolls his eyes, showing how much he hated him. 

"Oh really? I wonder why," Minho scowls. He just wanted to dig his nails into Daekhwa's face and tear it away. "You-" 

He remembered that Daekhwa was deemed as a nice person by Jisung. If he wanted to become a Daekhwa, he needed to be nice like him and not lunge at him. "You are so caring, thank you for your concern." The other male was taken aback by that in a not so good way. 

"Stop being so sarcastic!" Daekhwa growls, and Minho sees the concern wash over Jisung's face. The blonde tugged at Daekhwa's shirt - not that Daekhwa seemed to have noticed it, he was too busy; anger had filled him and hell was in the eyes. 

Minho wasn't so scared, he could just punch him and be done, but _be nice, be nice, be nice_ repeated in his mind like a mantra and Minho gathered himself. He had to be the water that needed to put down the fire in front of him. 

"I'm not being sarcastic," Minho cocks his head to the side and blinks up at him innocently, "I'm very thankful for your caring manners, perhaps you can console me." He knows he was acting like a little kid trying to show that he wasn't lying. His voice came out in fake-innocence and he just wanted to laugh at Daekhwa who was set ablaze with extreme anger. He looked like he was going to explode at any minute. 

"Pft, you must be out of your mind, is your poor little head really okay? I think you need another check-up you stupid fool," If he was trying to make Minho angry, it was working so well. Minho felt exasperated because Daekhwa was ridiculing his head injury, and not only was it rude, it was also very messed up.

"Actually, I have an appointment tomorrow," Minho laughs, "I hope I've recovered enough, I want to start dancing again already."

"Well sorry to break it to you, but I do need to tell you something," Daehwa crosses his arms over his chest and smirks, "The director of the dance team decided to take away your captain position and he passed it to me instead." Minho's eyes widened, he didn't believe this. He was sure Daekhwa was using that as a card to make him furious. 

"You're lying," Minho frowns, "You've got to be fucking lying!"

"Why would I be lying? The competition is coming up quickly and they need someone active, not someone who is currently in a dance ban. Taeyong and Ten can't just do it on their own. If you think I'm lying, I think you should talk to Yugyeom yourself, he will surely tell you why he decided to change the captain," Daekhwa stats, and it all hit Minho pretty hard. The role he worked hard for was now in the hands of Daekhwa. 

Instead of watering down Daekhea's fire, the water formed in Minho's eyes, almost covering his vision. 

"Too bad. I'm so sorry for your loss, but at least you're the president of the dance club. Ten wouldn't choose someone to replace you there, he likes you a lot." The rat sounded so satisfied, he seemed to be happy to see Minho break down right before his eyes and Minho hated himself for crying.

"Don't cry~It'll all be okay~," Daekhwa says with fake concern. The fakeness in his tone was expected of course, and Minho was to busy thinking about his new loss and didn't react to Daekhwa's rudeness. 

"Daekhwa, can you stop being mean to him? He is upset," Jisung says. 

Minho saw how Jisung eyed him with worry, and that only induced more pain into him. He needed to cover himself, he needed to hide and not show this pathetic side of himself. There was so much to cry about, but he just didn't want to do it in front of a rat he hated the most and in front of Jisung who he cares about the most. 

He stands up abruptly, turns around, and runs up the remaining few steps.

"Minho!" Jisung shouts with so much concern for the brunette. He looks at Daekhwa, "I'll go after him."

"I don't think it's necessary," Daekhwa says, "He is strong enough to deal with it on his own." 

This was his first time seeing Minho cry, it could mean something serious. Jisung wanted to be there for him as well, he wanted to try comforting him like how Minho did to him. That's what friends were for. And Daekhwa was being pretty mean to Minho, and that wasn't acceptable, he was surely going to speak to him later and tell him that he shouldn't be like this towards Minho whether he likes him or not. 

"I need to make sure he is okay," Jisung replies quickly, "See you later." 

He runs up the steps and picked up his pace. He sees Minho pulling open the bathroom door and stepped inside. Jisung quickly followed right after, and once he had gotten inside, he looked around for Minho. When he didn't see him against the wall or something, Jisung assumed that he might've locked himself up in one of the stalls. 

"Minho Hyung?" He calls out for him, there was no response, he didn't expect one. When he heard a soft sniffle, that confirmed that Minho was crying in one of the stalls. He walked over to the only closed stall door and knocks on it, "Minho, are you alright?" There still wasn't a reply, only a sob, and Jisung purses his lips, feeling a lot of worries. 

Minho did seem like he needed some time alone, however, Jisung didn't want to leave him alone, he wanted to be right here in the bathroom and immediately comfort him and assure him that everything's okay. He felt so much sympathy for him and felt bad that Minho was swept from his captain role because of an injury. Maybe the director will reconsider? Minho is an amazing dancer and great at leading. 

Jisung steps away from the stall door and heads over towards the wall and leaned back against it, patiently waiting for Minho to come out. The first thing Jisung wanted to do was pull him into a hug, Minho seems to be needing one. The sobs started to become louder, and Jisung closed his eyes as he felt his heart wrench. He felt like crying too. 

How can Daekhwa be so satisfied to see Minho like this? Even if they seem to dislike each other, that doesn't mean Daekhwa should've sounded so happy. 

"Jisung," Minho finally speaks, his voice sounding so frail. Jisung immediatly opens his eyes and steps towards the stall Minho was in. "You're still here?"

"Yeah...are you okay?" Jisung places his hand on the door, "Are you ready to come out now?" Minho doesn't reply to that. He probably only wanted to know if Jisung was here or not. Jisung wasn't just going to leave him behind in the bathroom.

He lets his arm drop to his side, and he heads over to the bathroom sink. He looked at his reflection in the mirror and it triggered a memory from a little while ago, it was a memory of him crying in the bathroom when he had thought of himself as a burden to Hyunjin - which now turned out to be true. He was a burden to both Jeongin and Hyunjin apparently. 

That day, Minho had come for him and said some confusing things just because Jisung had said that he wasn't crying and that it was all just allergies. During that moment, was Minho actually intending on comforting him? 

The bathroom door opening popped Jisung from his thoughts and his heart dropped when he saw that it was Jeongin who had stepped inside. The younger had noticed him as well, and the look on his face presented how he wasn't so thrilled to see Jisung here too. The scowl on his face struck Jisung painfully, he knew how much the younger despised him. 

"Why hello there," Jeongin says in fake joy, "Isn't it lovely to see you here now of all times." He stepped over to Jisung and stares at him with so much coldness in his eyes. Jisung hoped that Jeongin wouldn't start another argument, Minho was here in the bathroom and of course, he was going to hear everything. "You look pretty sad...do you miss Hyunjin? Well, I'm sorry, but you better fucking deal with it all and stop fucking grabbing some attention from others, it isn't doing you any good. Remember what I told you last time? You are such an attention seeker!" 

"Let's talk somewhere else," Jisung urges.

"Oh, and why should I listen to you huh? Talking here is completely fine with me! I need to teach you how to stop acting so fucking sad! Is it hard?" It is hard. It's hard to pull on an expression showing that he was okay when he wasn't okay at all. Everything just downpoured on him. 

"I'll do better, I promise," Jisung replies, and attempts to plead with his eyes. 

"It doesn't look like it. Some people like Minho are catching on and are talking to Hyunjin about it, asking him for validation about your long-gone friendship with him. Why is that happening? It's all because of you, you brat, you can't even control your damn emotions! If you are sad then go hide it!" Jeongin pushes Jisung making him stumble back a little. 

"I'm hiding it all from everyone, I'm trying the best I can. Is that not enough, or should I disappear?"

"Hah! You disappearing? That's going to be the best thing in the world! All you do is ruin things for people. Destruction is right at your hands. Do everyone a favor and get lost. I don't care where you go, just leave." 

Jisung's mouth was slightly agape due to the shock from those words. "I...uh...-"

A loud slam and an angry scream made the two of them jolt and Jisung spun around swiftly. It was Minho of course who else could it be? Minho unlocked the stall door and flung it open, he was burning with so much anger and it showed when he charged over to Jisung's side. He stares at Jeongin darkly and shakes his head at him disappointedly. Jeongin looked unfazed; he just stood there and anticipated Minho's words. 

"Yang Jeongin," Minho starts, agitation at the tip of his tongue, "You've got to be fucking kidding me. Not only did I expect so much better from you, but I'm also completely disapointed in you. Are you even fucking sane? How can you say those things to Jisung? Don't you know how he feels?"

"And why should I care? His feelings don't matter to me at all. I don't care if he cries, dies, or whatever. I'm not even friends with that pathetic piece of shit." Jeongin spat, and Jisung lowers his head. Minho places his hand on Jisung's shoulder and squeezes it, seemingly trying to comfort him. 

"Exactly! This is the problem! You don't care! All you care about is yourself! Have you ever thought about how Hyunjin feels? How can you make Hyunjin avoid Jisung? They are best friends! They knew each other for a long time, and you here are a selfish bastard. Jisung isn't the one ruining things! It's you!" Minho yells. The anger-filled yell scared Jisung a bit; Minho was so frightening when he was extremely mad. 

Surprisingly it didn't seem to have terrified Jeongin a single bit. He stood as solid as a pole and looked at the brunette with very little amusement - scolding and yelling probably didn't affect him that much. Jeongin is so strong. 

"Jisung isn't doing anything that is ruining people! He is doing Hyunjin and you a fucking favor and is avoiding you two even when he probably doesn't like it, even when he is hurt about it! You saying that he is ruining things just makes me want to laugh. Jisung is not only a good friend, but he is the kindest and most considerate person I know," Minho removes his hand from Jisung's shoulder and steps towards Jeongin and pokes him right in the center of his chest. "You're doing a lot of things that are ruining people's moods. Jisung is upset, Hyunjin feels stuck, and I feel betrayed. I thought you were a good person, you seemed so nice and sweet, but I guess that's not entirely how you are. I even thought you were a great friend, but that's not the case anymore. Let's end things right here." Jisung widens his eyes in shock. "If you do anything to hurt Jisung like this, I'll fucking hurt you!" 

This is one of the other reasons why Jisung had never spoken about any of these things. It did nothing but ruin friendships. Minho and Jeongin are no longer friends. 

"Whatever," Jeongin says, showing very little amounts of care, "If that's all you got to say, then I'm out." He turned towards the door and ambled out of the bathroom. Once the door shut, Minho let out a sigh. He stood still and then began to sob again. 

"Minho..." Jisung mutters out and rushes towards him and stands in front of him. Minho steps towards him, and placed his face on Jisung shoulder, his sobs were heavier now and louder, but they were muffled by Jisung's shoulder. He was quick to wrap his arms around the older. 

They stood like this for a little bit, until Minho pulled away and wiped away his tears. Jisung could tell he was under so much distress. "I'm sorry Minho, I'm very sorry." 

"What are you sorry about? There is nothing you should be sorry about."

"There are a lot of things I'm sorry about. First, I ruined your friendship with Jeongin-"

"Cut that shit out Jisung!" Minho snaps, Jisung flinches a bit at the anger in Minho's voice again, "I want to have nothing to do with Jeongin. Everything he said to you makes me completely disgusted in him. I don't want friends like that." This time Minho was the one to pulls him into a hug, one hand rested in the middle of Jisung's back and the other rested at the back of his head. "Actually, I'm the one who is sorry. I should've been a better friend to you or even a better person to you from the start." 

"Non-sense, Minho even if in the beginning you were so mean to me, the way you are treating me now makes me forget about all that. You are a super good friend to me, thank you for sticking by my side a lot and asking if things are going okay. And thanks for standing up for me, even if I didn't want you to do it for me." 

"Silly," Minho laughs, "I need to stand up for you. I can't let that bastard bash at you like that. You are worth more than his stupid words." Jisung feels warmth burn at his cheeks and he lets out a sigh of content.

"Minho Hyung, are you okay?" Jisung asks and wraps his arms around Minho again. If Minho's hug was making him feel much better, he was sure that hugging him back was going to make Minho feel better too. 

"No, definitely not, so much shit is happening. Having my dance captain title taken makes me feel so horrible and empty, I worked hard for it but I guess it is what it is, I can't participate in dance for the next few weeks. I understand though. They need an active captain to held with the prepping and leading. Oh how much I wish I could just reverse time and prevent myself from injuring myself, none of this would've happened and I'd happily be performing," Minho says and sighs dejectedly. Jisung could feel the frown in his voice. "The other thing that is happening is this fucking Jeongin-Hyunjin thing. It's both of their faults and I'm so mad at them. Hyunjin needs to think before taking action and Jeongin seriously needs to not only watch his mouth but think about his actions too. I'm pretty sure it's affecting Hyunjin by a lot." 

"You must know what is going on now," Jisung says.

"I guess Hyunjin told me about it all," Minho replies, "Jisung, he cares about you. I hope you can understand him. I know you are very hurt, but he is hurt as well, he wants to fix things. And Jisung, let me know if anyone acts like a jerk to you okay?" 

"Okay," Jisung responds. 

"Promise?" Minho pulls away from Jisung and outstretches his hand - all his fingers curled into his palm except for his small pinky-finger. Jisung smiles and the two of them lock their pinky-fingers together. 

"Jisung, don't disappear okay? Tell me whenever you are feeling gloomy. You mean a lot to me, and I don't want you to disappear, I will be so sad if you do. You make me so happy, so please...stay and don't disappear. I know that sounded selfish and all, but I think I'll cry for hours if I no longer see you," Minho says. Something at Jisung's heart tugged and tears formed in his eyes and spilled down his cheeks. "Jisung don't cry." He had to cry, Minho's words touched him a lot.

He places his hands against Minho's cheeks, "I won't disappear."

"Thanks, Jisung-ah, I love you a lot." Another tug to his heart and his mouth forms a small 'o.' Maybe he loves him as a friend? It could be that. Jisung smiles at what Minho had said and removes his hands from his face. 

"Should we head to literature now? I hope we aren't late," Jisung says and uses his phone to check the time, and he widens his eyes when he sees that they are two minutes over, "Yeah let's head to class now, we are two minutes late." 

"We can just skip class, I have a good grade in that class, and I'm sure you do too," Minho suggests, but Jisung didn't agree with that. Minho shouldn't miss any more days of school.

"Nah, we are going to class Minho, it's good that you show up to all your classes." Minho frowns but then nods anyway, and the two exit the bathroom. 

"You know what my physics professor told me yesterday?" Minho says, "He said that I need to fix my habits. Maybe I can learn from you." 

"Yeah, sure," Jisung laughs, "You might not learn a lot from me though." 


	15. A Downfall

Several days had passed; nothing much had changed. Well, one tiny thing did; Hyunjin and Jeongin stopped joining in for lunch. It wasn't that much of a big deal, but deep inside Minho felt sorry for Hyunjin. Jeongin was taking things a little _too_ far. They stopped joining in for lunch right after Minho's unpleasant fight with Jeongin in the bathroom. 

Hyunjin gave his explanation; he told them that it was because he and Jeongin wanted to spend time alone with each other, but Minho knew that was bullshit, and he was sure that it was because of Jeongin; he wanted to drag Hyunjin away as much as he could and keep him to himself - selfish brat. 

Jisung no longer joined in with his so-called friends for lunch as well. He stopped hanging out with them once Seungmin and Felix treated him like he was invisible or something. 

Jisung also stopped showing up to school early, and Minho supposed that he was right that particular day when he said that he was no longer going to show up early and sit at the bench. Minho wants the blonde to rest comfortably no matter what. 

He was still dating Daekhwa; much to Minho's gloom, and each contact they had with each other only dragged Minho further into his pits of misery. 

He couldn't let this pain affect him, but his fists would ball up anyway and he would grind his jaw trying his best to keep his feelings secured inside him. 

Even Chan noticed Minho acting way too different for these past days and checked in with him a lot, asking if he was okay but Minho would reply that he was and he was just stressed out about his physics class, that he was still failing.

 _Breathe. Don't think about Jisung too much. Just let him go_. Minho had tried to inform himself - it wasn't so easy, because Jisung was his desire, and whenever the blonde was around Daekhwa, Minho would forget about his thoughts and forget about controlling his emotions and come up with more plans.

Sometimes, whatever he tried doing just got too overwhelming and the feeling that all of it was difficult restrained him, and he wanted to flee, he wanted to say fuck it all and just give up on Jisung. He wanted to pull off the shit of pastels he was wearing, he wanted to go to Gahyeon and kill two birds with one stone; ask her for help in physics and also end up hooking up with that pretty girl. 

He just felt like he was done for. Jisung and Daekhwa were just perfect for each other. Why have pointless hopes? Pining was just giving Minho nothing else but feelings of pain. 

But again, seeing _Daekhwa_ with Jisung made Minho's desire to burn inside his heart. If he gives up, he is letting Daekhwa win, letting Daekhwa have Jisung to himself. 

He couldn't let those things nurture. 

There is no one else like Jisung. 

Even if the pathway is like knives stabbing through his feet, Minho will not stop. 

Other than those wretched things, Minho was glad that the days passed by, it was the last week of his annoying dance ban, and he was finally going to be able to dance next week and he could return to not only the dance club still as the president but he could return to the dance team - no longer captain, but as a proud member of the team. 

He thinks he is going to be fine, but seeing Daekhwa being the new one leading wasn't going to be so fine. But he had to deal with it. Over that shit, Minho wasn't going to quit the team, he was there for his passion not for the high role (even though he low key still feels horrible for losing his precious title.)

Today was the day of the competition between four dance teams from different universities including this one, and even if Minho was feeling so spiteful for not being able to participate, he still bought a ticket for himself and choose to sit in the middle row. All he was going to do was sit down, watch, and _judge_. 

"Hey, Minho!" He hears someone call out for him, he looks over that direction and smiles when he sees Chan walk over to him and take a seat next to him. At least now his best friend joined him. "You decided to watch the competition?" 

"Yeah," Minho replies, "And find their mistakes." 

"Jesus Minho," Chan laughs, "Watch and _enjoy_." 

"I seek no enjoyment." 

"I pity you," Chan snickers, "Well, are you ready to see the competition?"

"Nope," Minho sternly answers, "I'm just here because I felt the need to be here. I don't want to miss out on things. Maybe I can imagine myself right there dancing," he points at the empty stage in front of him, "Maybe then I can enjoy."

"Minho, Minho, Minho," Chan shakes his head, "You are putting all your grief into me. Cheer up, this is the last week of your dance ban, and next week you can officially start dancing again, aren't you excited?" 

"Yeah, very," Minho scoffs, "I couldn't practice for this competition, and here I am stupidly planning on watching them perform." 

"How is that stupid? And why did you even buy the ticket if you aren't even that happy with it?" 

Before he could utter out a response, the lights all dimmed down all of a sudden, and the crowd had silenced up. 

Minho turned his head to the front and saw the performance art director, BamBam, step onto the stage with the microphone held tightly onto his hand. He raises the mic to his mouth, "Hello everyone!" He says in such a cheerful way, "I'm glad you all could make it tonight to the annual dance competition between four dance teams! They've worked very hard, so please show all of your support! I hope you guys enjoy the performances they've prepared! Now let's let the competition begin!" He does a weird dance and dabs at the end, and Minho cringed so hard at that, Chan noticed and snickered. 

"So judgemental," Chan says.

"Shut it." 

"Don't talk like that to your Hyung." 

During the performances, Minho didn't pay much mind to the teams that weren't this school. 

Just as his eyelids began to feel heavy, BamBam dashed back onto the stage, "Woo! That performance was hot! Good job Dazzling Leopards! Now last but not least, the Dancing Dynasty!" 

The said team headed onto the stage and BamBam handed the mic to Yugyeom, "Hello guys! I'm Yugyeom, the director of the Dancing Dynasty! It nice to see you all here! We worked hard for the past month to bring you a magnificent performance. I hope you guys enjoy it! Thank you." He hands the mic back to BamBam and joins in with the students standing in formation. 

The music turned on, the first segment of their performance contained the song Minho himself recommended. He also created choreography for that song, but before he could even present the team the movements, he had an unfortunate injury. His hard work was wasted.

Minho could tell that Daekhwa was the one that choreographed this portion of the performance, the dance moves had shown it all. The moves were intense and quick-paced, but pretty basic, it all contrasted to how Minho danced - sharp and sleek. Therefore the first portion of their performance wasn't too great nor was it too bad. 

"Wooyoung is a little slower than the rest of them," Minho randomly pointed out, "They shouldn't have let the new captain choreograph the beginning, Taeyong or Ten could've done it instead, they don't focus on the intensity they focus on flow." 

"I don't understand dance, but I'll pretend to care," Chan cackles, Minho rolls his eyes and smiles, "Honestly Minho, you should probably go talk to Yugyeom about letting you become captain again, you are so perfect for that role. You are a skilled dancer and have so much experience and proper judgment." 

"I don't want to seem like I'm hungry for that role," Minho sighs and turns his attention back to the performers. "I'll just continue being in the team, no longer as captain." 

After the performance, there was a short five-minute intermission for the judges to decide who should be the winning team. And once the five minutes slid past, BamBam appeared onto the stage with an envelope in hand.

"Okay, now the moment we have been waiting for!" BamBam waves the envelope, "The results! Let's see who had won the grand prize..." He proceeded to open the envelope, and he took out the card. "The winner is...the Dazzling Leopards!" 

Everyone cheers for them and the winning team ran onto the stage, half of them with happy expressions on their faces.

Both Minho and Chan left the performing arts center and walked to the student parking area. Before they stepped onto the parking area, Chan halted, making Minho automatically pause too. 

"What's wrong?" Minho asks, looking at him confused. 

"That's what I wanted to ask you, you look pretty upset right now," Chan states. 

"Chan, I'm okay, there is nothing wrong," Minho smiles, "Let's go?" 

Chan looked like he needed to say more things to him, but he instead nods, "Okay, I'll get going now. Goodnight Minho, take care."

"Goodnight Hyung." 

When Minho arrived at his apartment the first thing he did was crash onto the couch, and cover his eyes with his arm, blocking away the light. And all he did was think. Think about Jisung, think about ways to get him, think about what he loves, what he loves to do. Those were things that he needed to find out. He needed to understand Jisung better and capture his heart. He needed to watch his and Daekhwa's every move. 

His swarm of thoughts was all swept away one he heard knocking at his door. He groans and forcefully moved from his couch, and ambles tiredly towards his door. When he opened it, he looked at Chan in surprise. How come he didn't go straight home? 

The older had no expressions on his face, and in one hand was coffee and on the other was a small paper bag. Minho knew what this ment - Chan came here to talk. 

"Minho, just by looking at the expression on your face, I can tell there is a lot on your mind," Chan starts and walks past Minho. The brunette watches as chan places the coffee and bag onto the coffee table. "So drink some coffee and inform me on what is going on, okay? I, your best friend care about you, and love you." 

Chan sits down on the couch and gazes at Minho, waiting for him to join in. 

"It's night," Minho says, not moving from his place near the door. 

"And?" 

"Isn't your roommate lonely right now?" Minho closes the door, and walks over towards Chan, but doesn't sit down just yet. "He might be wondering where you are."

"Why? Do you want me to leave? Do you not want me here? I can leave if you want me to."

"No! That's not what I mean!" Minho replies defensively. 

"Thought so," Chan scoffs, "Now come sit. I've texted Changbin, so he knows." 

"Okay," Minho sighs and sits down beside Chan. 

"Tell me Minho, tell me why you are like this?" 

"Like what?"

"You haven't been well, and you always seem like you are stuck in thoughts, and you always look stressed out." 

"I told you that it's because of physics."

"I think there is more to it than just physics Minho. Last year when you nearly failed calculus, you didn't feel like this." 

"Maybe things changed, maybe I care more about grades, maybe I want to study harder." 

" _Minho,"_ Chan sighs _,_ "I understand you more than anyone else. I know something is going on. And if it's physics that is bothering you, I can try to help. I don't understand physics quite well, but I can help you find someone to help you okay? I want to do whatever it takes to make you feel at ease and stressless. Tell me anything, and I'll help you no matter what."

_So if I ask you to get Jisung to fall in love with me, will you be able to do that?_

"It hurts me to see you not okay. Please don't avoid me and give me a chance to help you. Don't pretend to be happy for others." 

Right at those words, the bubble Minho had maintained for so long had burst, and right out of his eyes came the streams of pain he tried his best to hide from others.

Instantly, arms wrapped around him, and Minho nestles his face onto Chan's shoulder and cried out his heart. The older didn't say anything, but rubbed Minho's back and patiently waited for him to calm down. 

He hadn't told him anything. He didn't spill about how overwhelmed he was feeling. He only remained crying until he was completely drained from his tears. 

Chan spent the night with him, and the following morning he cooked Minho breakfast and asked if he was feeling much better. Minho wasn't feeling much better, he still felt pretty empty, but he gave him a small smile and told them that he was and thanked him for staying with him even if he didn't have to. 

Chan is a precious gem; so loyal and pure. Minho didn't deserve such a big-hearted friend like him. 

\-------

It was nearing midnight; Jisung tapped his pencil onto his notebook, stuck on an equation. He was growing tired and his eyes just wanted to give up on him and close, but he had to finish his work. He couldn't let his grade slip just because he couldn't understand the confusing problem. 

He wanted two things right now; help with his homework so he could just get it done and sleep already and he wanted to communicate normally with Hyunjin because it's been a while since they talked to each other normally. 

He didn't know how he managed to endure these days. These past days he felt lonely. He lost friends, and he was only left with Minho, Chan, and Daekhwa; the only three that seemed happy to be around him 

Hyunjin had finished all of his work, Jisung could tell because instead of the sounds of writing, the sounds of a video could be heard. He probably was trying to entertain himself after doing work for hours.

Jisung bites onto his bottom lip, contemplating on whether or not he should speak up. It's been so long, he just has to. Deep in the dark pits of his heart, he couldn't deny that he missed him like crazy even when he felt petty towards him. 

Yeah, they roomed together, he sees him a lot, but he just _misses_ him. Misses how things used to be. 

He turns around and glances at the black-haired boy, who was smiling as he stared at his laptop screen. 

For a moment Jisung had to ponder - his heart was telling him to get it over with. Something like this didn't seem like it should even be hard to do, but for Jisung it was something impossible. The words he desperately wanted to let out were stuck at his throat. 

Hyunjin sensed Jisung staring, and he pulls his gaze away from the screen and looks over at Jisung with a raised eyebrow and that's when the words that were enclosed in his throat finally managed to escape out his mouth.

"Um...can you help me with a math problem? I've been having a hard time on it, and I want to get it all done and sleep," Jisung asks. Hyunjin looked surprised for a second; he probably didn't expect the blonde to ask him for help. 

He collected himself, paused the video he was watching, and quickly headed over to Jisung and stood next to the seated boy. 

"Which one?" He asks as he looks at the paper. Jisung pointed right at the problem he was having a hard time on. "Ohh, okay. This is pretty simple, you see..." 

Jisung paid close attention to every single step; Hyunjin had helped him pretty well and Jisung was happy to understand somethings, however, when Hyunjin decided to review more of it, Jisung began to doze off. It wasn't because he was growing bored with it, it was because he was thinking about the black-haired boy. 

There were so many thoughts about Hyunjin that were accumulating in his mind; thoughts like: _Should we talk things out later? Will he even listen to me? I didn't listen to him when he wanted to explain things._

"Jisung are you paying attention?" Jisung jolted back to attention and Hyunjin softly laughs. 

It's been a while since he heard the older laugh. And even when he had always heard Hyunjin laugh before, it was nothing like it was now. The laugh was so beautiful, and it felt like Jisung hadn't heard it in years. The beautiful sound was enough to enlighten Jisung's heart and make him feel so light all over. 

At this rate, his heart was being frantic, it was telling him to be nice to Hyunjin and forget about everything, and just be friends with him again. It was what Jisung needed, it was something that was going to make him truly happy. 

"Jisung?" Jisung blinks and looks up at Hyunjin apologetically, the older smiles and shakes his head. "You keep dozing off. Hang in there, I just have a little bit more to explain and then we are done and you can sleep." 

Jisung nods and stares at his paper. Again, Hyunjin continues to explain, this time Jisung actually listened well and was satisfied that he was finished. He was grateful that Hyunjin still helped him even if they both weren't so close anymore. 

"You did a great job! It wasn't so hard was it?" Hyunjin says; the joyous tone in his voice showed how proud he was. But then his expression faltered into a one of worry when he noticed Jisung's eyes filling with tears."Oh...what's wrong? Why are you crying?" 

"I'm just thankful that you helped me," Jisung sobs. 

"Yah...Jisung-ah," Hyunjin sighs, "No need to thank me, I love helping. Now that you are done, let's head to sleep." 

Jisung complies and headed right to his bed, and he watches as Hyunjin closes his laptop and places it on his desk before he lays down on his bed. Quickly, Jisung sprung out of his bed and sit's down at the side of Hyunjin's bed and the older stared at him dumbfoundedly. 

"What are you doing?" He asks and sits upright.

"Scoot over." Jisung gestures for him to move. Hyunjin does as he is told and Jisung scoots so that he was right beside him. Hyunjin continues to eye the blonde with so much confusion. "You know...I miss you."

Hyunjin widened his eyes, completely stunned by Jisung's words. "What...you do?"

 _Well ouch_ , Jisung thinks. Hyunjin must have thought Jisung was completely done with him and didn't want to associate with him anymore, but those things weren't exactly true. Even if he was furious with Hyunjin and even if he didn't previously want to listen to Hyunjin's words nor smile at him, it didn't mean Jisung completely despised him. 

"Yes, Hyunjin Hyung, I miss you so so so much," Jisung confirms, "Do you miss me?"

"Yeah, I miss you more than anything Jisung. I missed you for days, and I literally was waiting for this day. The day we talk about our feelings, and the day you let me say what I need to say. Are you ready to listen to me?" Hyunjin asks, and he stares into Jisung's eyes. The blonde could see so much doubt within those orbs. 

"Of course."

"You won't walk away will you?" That hit Jisung straight in his heart, and he felt large amounts of guilt. 

"No, I won't," Jisung says truthfully. 

"Am I allowed to smack you if you do?" 

"Hyung!" Jisung whines, "I will listen to you. I won't run away. Now tell me what you need to say, and I promise that I won't yell at you nor will I accuse you. I want to hear your words." 

"Okay. I've talked to Minho several days ago, well actually, he asked me, and I answered, he was suspicious of what was going on and cared about you so much," Jisung nods, and doesn't interject, "Jisung, I completely understand how you feel. I know I hurt and betrayed you for Jeongin, and I completely regret doing that. Jeongin was uncomfortable with you, but that is no reason for me to turn against you like this, and I'm very sorry. I was stuck between two choices. Either I make Jeongin satisfied or not damage our friendship in any way, so my stupid self decided to choose Jeongin because I loved him a lot. Yeah, it's a very stupid decision and I'm very sorry. I kept on thinking that it would be better if I just focused on Jeongin because I didn't want him to be displeased by me. I would like to apologize for what I did, and really, you don't have to forgive me if you don't want to, I know how much I hurt you."

"It's fine."

"Minho's words finally caught to me, and honestly, I do think Jeongin is jealous. I will talk to him and assure him that I love him and only him and there is nothing else that will stop my feelings for him. I love him so much."

"Pft. I can see that, you two overexpress your love, bleh," Jisung fake gags, and then laughs once Hyunjin playfully smacks him on his thigh, "I don't get it though, he doesn't need to be jealous about anything, I don't even have feelings for you and just like you as my best friend. Plus I'm dating Daekhwa." 

Hyunjin widens his eyes, and blinks several times, "Huh?"

"Yeah," Jisung smiles, "He is so nice to me! The sweetest person ever." 

"No, not that..." Hyunin laughs, "You like me as a best friend...does that mean-"

"If you want us to be friends again, there is nothing more that I want," Jisung cuts him off. 

"It would be so great if we could be friends again," Hyunjin smiles.

"Then let's make it happen," Jisung smiles wider. Hyunjin pulls Jisung into a tight, bone-crushing happy hug, and it made Jisung giggle. He missed Hyunjin's hugs too.

Seconds later, Hyunjin finally pulls away. "Such a relief," he sighs, "Thank you for listening to what I needed to say this time. And sorry about that day we argued, I didn't mean to tell you I disliked you. I said it out of rage and without thinking, and I'm sorry for saying that you are low." 

"It's fine hyung, honestly, I was pretty low and rude for not listening to what you needed to say. I was being such an ass to you," Jisung frowns, "Next time let's listen to each other and not fight like that."

"Agreed," Hyunjin smiles, "Now, let's sleep." 

The two of them shift so that they were laying down, and Jisung snuggles in close to Hyunjin. The older tensed at that for a brief moment but he eventually relaxed and rested his arm over Jisung. "Good night."

"Good night," Jisung yawns and nuzzles his face against Hyunjin's chest.

\--------

Desperation. It was a wild and intense feeling that was gnawing at Minho's mind, leaving him frantic. He couldn't control himself, his heart was beating quickly, his head was hurting because the thoughts he was having were just so overwhelming. He couldn't stop thinking about Jisung. 

Wakes up? Bam! He thinks about Jisung. Drives to school? Still Jisung. In class? Jisung. 

Minho just wanted to scream.

He quickly exited his class, ran through the halls at his fullest speed, not caring about his sides that were beginning to cramp up. He ignored the stares the students gave him as he swooped past them. 

The cafeteria was quite a distance away, but he knew he could make it there quickly if he continues to keep up with his running; he wasn't much of a runner, but one name was motivating him to keep going. _Jisung_.

When he reached the cafeteria, he looked around, it wasn't too full nor was it too empty, there were a decent amount of students here and there, talking to their friends while they ate their meal. Amongst those students, he was looking for a particular student - or maybe he can say, _students_. 

They weren't here yet, and this means that he just had to wait. Hence, he found an empty table to sit at and waited until he saw a happy blonde and a smiling silver-haired walk towards the long line - holding hands. 

That was more than enough to make Minho angry and feel so disgusted. How could that rat touch Jisung's hand like that? Jisung's hand was worth more than Daekhwas annoying presence that Minho wanted to eliminate. 

"What's up Minho? It's been a long time since we last ate together as you made more new friends." Ten sits in front of him, practically blocking Minho's view. It wasn't a big deal, Ten was an inch shorter anyway. Minho still had a good view though because Jisung and Daekhwa moved along with the line. 

"What are you looking at?" The older turned around to see where Minho's eyes were set on, and then he turns back towards the brunette. "The line is getting a bit shorter if that's what you are staring at." 

"Yo, Minho how are you doing! It's been a while!" Mingi sits next to him and slings an arm around him. "Weeks right? Are you feeling better now?" 

When there was no response, Mingi removed his arm from around Minho. The brunette wasn't paying attention to his dance team friends, his eyes moved along with the couple, staring intensely, studying their actions, getting triggered at the sweetness the couple had with each other. 

"What's wrong with him? He doesn't look so happy right now." Another joined in; San. 

"Is he mad at us?" Yunho joined in as well. 

" _Oh_ ," Ten speaks, "Is it because of your captain position? Look, it isn't mine nor was it Taeyongs fault. Yugyeom needed to replace you because we needed someone active, and Daekhwa was the perfect candidate for it because he is a hard-worker and efficient."

Minho still wasn't listening, their voices were inaudible to him and he continued to stare. 

The couple got their lunches and picked a table to sit at. Three tables away from where Minho was sitting. They weren't too far away, that was good because Minho could see their actions from close. He wished he could know what they were talking about, but because they weren't nearby and because of the chatters, he wasn't able to hear him as he desired. 

"Minho, I'm sorry about everything that happened to you, but look on the bright side, you can return to everything next week! Isn't that great?" Yunho asks in a happy tone. 

Ignored, again. 

"Yah! Yunho is talking to you!" Mingi says in a snarky way.

Ignored. 

"Mingi-ah, it's fine, I don't think he is listening to us anyway," Yunho responds sadly. 

"Goodness," Ten groans, "Minho, are you ignoring us?"

"Isn't that obvious? He _is_ ignoring us," San points out, "This is getting annoying." 

Daekhwa ruffles Jisung's hair and feeds him a spoonful of his fried rice. _Cringey_ , Minho thinks to himself, but if he were in Daekhwa's place he'd definitely do the same, maybe he could make it less cringey? 

Suddenly his face was pelted by water, and he gasps in shock. 

Wanting to find the culprit he turned his head and narrows his eyes at Ten who was holding onto a water bottle, and he didn't look too happy either. His eyes were infused with pure anger. "Oh look, now he sees us." 

Minho raises an eyebrow, "What are you talking about?"

"Stop acting dumb, we know you are ignoring us!" San points accusingly, Yunho nods in agreement. _Ignoring them?_ He was beyond confused, but then he realized that he was ignoring them. They were talking to him while his eyes were boring on Jisung and Daekhwa. 

"Uh, sorry, I was out of it, so what were you guys talking about?" Minho asks, a smile now present on his lips. Ten sighs loudly and rubs his temples and Mingi scoffs. 

"Are you excited about next week? You'll finally be able to freely dance," Yunho claims with excitement, "I missed seeing you in the dance club, and the members of the club missed you too." 

"Awh, that's nice to hear, at least I'll be there next week." Minho quickly glances at Jisung before he meets with Ten's eyes. "You guys did great at the performance."

"You watched us?" Ten widens his eyes, "Really?!"

"Yeah," Minho smiles, "Even if you didn't win, you guys still did super great!" 

"Thank you, Minho!" San smiles, "We can't wait to have you back. Will you still be on the team?"

"Yeah," Minho replies.

"Sorry about your captainship, maybe Yugyeom would reconsider, he is pretty understanding," Ten says, "I know I shouldn't be talking bad about the new captain, but he is kind of getting on my nerves. He is so bossy and arrogant."

"Hah, I can see that," Minho responds, "But I doubt I can the position though." 

Minho stares at the couple again, and when he sees them standing up and leaving, Minho quickly stands up too, "I'll get going, I have to run some errands." 

"Wait wha-"

Minho quickly leaves and follows the couple, trying to keep a safe distance from them. Getting noticed by them and having his plan ruined wasn't something he wanted. He followed them out the cafeteria, up the stairs, through the corridor in the second level, and turned the corner when they did. 

They ended up standing in front of a floor-to-ceiling window, and they gazed out at the front field. Minho hid from them but was still close enough to hear their conversation. 

"Baby." Hearing that come out of Daekhwa's mouth made Minho feel smaller and worthless. 

"I can't believe it's almost a month since we are dating," the rat says, enthusiasm in his voice.

"Next week it will officially be a month, I'm so happy," Jisung says cheerfully, and it breaks Minho's heart. 

All this affection they were sharing was making Minho want to run away, and hide in his apartment for a while, but he had to continue what he had to do - document everything. 

He takes out his phone and records everything they talk about. 

\--------

The night rolled through; for a few hours, he worked on homework and studying for his physics quiz. 

After he felt like he was done, he quickly retrieves his notebook that was placed aside and pulled out his phone to play the recording, and wrote things down.

Once he finished, he re-read everything, and then leaned back against his chair and stared up at the ceiling, "Fucking Daekhwa. He just has to be so good."

"You want to go ice skating with Daekhwa when winter comes by?" Minho says and frowns, "Maybe you should be going with me. You _will_ be going with me." 

He closes his notebook and goes to lay down on his bed. "I can make that happen. I think I can make you love me." 

\--------

He didn't stop. He continued this bad habit of his and followed wherever Jisung would go around campus. He would continue examining his actions and behaviors around Daekhwa, and would even go as far as taking pictures of them and stare at them with so much rage filling inside of him. 

He was reaching a point, a bad point. He wanted to go as far as killing Daekhwa. 

How could he do it without anyone knowing? 

During the lunch break, he follows them again; they headed to their same hangout place, and they gazed out at the beautiful school field as they spoke to each other. 

"Jisung baby," Daekhwa pulls the blonde into a hug, "Happy one month anniversary." 

"Happy one month anniversary to you too," Jisung says sweetly. 

"I got you something." Minho watches curiously as Daekhwa takes off his backpack and pulls out a tiny black box. He hands it over to Jisung who was cherry-red, and the blonde stares at the box with wide eyes. He opens it and gasps in shock. 

"A necklace?! Oh my, you didn't have to." Minho felt like throwing up. It wasn't because he felt disgusted, it was because Jisung was way out of his league at this point. 

"I have to baby, I love you," Daekhwa responds, "We've never kissed...so can I kiss you?"

"Daekhwa..." Jisung mutters, "You didn't have to give me a gift, I love you no matter what." 

Minho felt sick, so, so, so sick. He grabbed the hem of his pastel purple shirt, bit onto his bottom lip, causing blood to seep out and felt hot tears rush out of his eyes. 

_No! Why?_

_Jisung, I love you too! I can do more for you._

"Try on the necklace, beautiful."

A loud sob escaped from Minho's mouth, it was loud enough for them to hear and he swiftly pulled on his hood and starts walking away. He didn't want them to find out that he had been following them.

"What was that?" Jisung asks. 

"Someone's probably crying," Daekhwa responds, "I'll go check it out." 

Now he made a run for it. 

He ran through the corridors and hurried down the stairs. He wasn't being careful and only focused on escaping fast. He ended up stumbling and he tried to grab onto the rail, but he couldn't manage to touch it and he ended up falling down the stairs. His arm hit against the sidewall and he winces hard from the excruciating amount of pain. 

"Minho!" He hears a shout, "Oh my fucking god!" Hands gripped onto his shoulders, and he looks up at Seungmin whose eyes were widened in horror. "Are you okay?!" He exclaims.

"Yeah, I'm okay...I think," Minho chuckles even though his head was hurting way too much. It was much more painful than the injury during dance practice. 

He sits upright and grips onto his head, shifting had made the pain even worse, and tears started pouring out of his eyes. He couldn't see anymore, his vision was fading away.

Desperately he grabs Seungmin and clings onto him for dear life.

"Someone call for help! Fucking hurry!" Seungmin yells.

Everything went all black and he went limp.


	16. A love so tough

_“His medical record shows that he had suffered a concussion not too long ago. There is a chance he may have suffered a second one after a fall, but we will have to run some tests and question him once he wakes up.”_

_“Will he be okay?”_

_“He is in stable condition.”_

At the voices, Minho flutters his eyes open and instantly winces at the blinding light that stung against his orbs; sending rays of pain to his already hurting head. He blinks several times in hopes of clearing his vision, and he immediately scowls upon the realization that he was in a hospital room. _Oh fuck_. He looks at his body and see’s wires attached to his arms, and he follows the string that ended at what appeared to be a heart monitor. 

“You’re awake!” The shout made him grimace; it was loud and piercing. Nevertheless, he turned his head to the side and spotted the blonde-haired boy approaching him - a complete relief-washed look on his face. He cups Minho’s face so guardedly, “Do you remember me?” He asks.

“Who are you?” Minho speaks, his voice came out tired, “What am I doing here?” The expression that once was relief swapped to straight on alarm. 

“No way. Did he lose his memories?” The brown-haired boy asks and advances over to the hospital bed as well. He examines Minho thoroughly. “He looks pretty empty...”

“I suppose so, how bad was his fall?” the blonde asks. 

“I don’t think he hit his head, though. He only fell down the remaining couple sets of steps, but he did hurt his arm very bad, I saw how it hit against the wall. I’m sure he passed out because of the pain,” the brown-haired boy replies. “Hyung, you don’t remember anything at all? What is your last memory?” 

“That mop-head yelling ‘you’re awake’ so loudly and touching my face,” Minho replies jokingly. 

“Oh god, this isn’t good,” Chan says and retracts his hands. Tears gathered in his eyes, and Minho felt so awful and guilty for pretending to lose his memories. Chan and Seungmin are so pitifully gullible. It was supposed to be a prank, and Minho knew that he took it too far at this rate, so he decides to come clean. 

“Tch. I didn’t lose my memories. Though that would’ve been good enough for me, I don’t want to remember anything anyways as my days are already a pain in the ass,” Minho blurts out, speaking his mind, “So stop crying Channie Hyung.”

“Yah! What the hell?! Why did you pretend?! I was so scared and upset!” Chan shouts and lightly smacks Minho on the stomach, “Don’t do this to me anymore! It’s hurtful.” 

“I’m glad you didn’t lose your memories, and I’m sad that _you_ wanted to,” Seungmin frowns, “Why do you think your days are a pain in the ass?”

“Because they just are,” Minho scoffs, “But I swear if I have another fucking concussion I will not tell the dance teacher or even my dance director! I’ve been through so much for the past fucking month! I think the world has something against me! This is so maddening! These wires are maddening! Everything is maddening!” 

“Calm down. Calm down,” Chan sighs, “The world has nothing against you, accidents just happen to you, but that doesn’t mean it’s because things are turned against you. Cheer up. Things will get better for you.” 

“Speaking of accidents, why were you running down the stairs? No one was chasing after you, and you weren’t late for anything since it was lunch break,” Seungmin asks, an eyebrow raised in the questioning of Minho’s typical weird antics. 

“I was running from the love of my life,” Minho grunts out, and picks at the wires as if they were so interesting. _Interestingly horrendous_. 

Stop that. Don’t play with the wires; they are not made to be played with," Chan scolds, and Minho glares at him.

“Hmph, fine.”

“Love of your life...? Are you dating someone?” Seungmin queered.

“Hah, in my dreams,” Minho laughs humorlessly but then immediately shuts up when he sees a doctor step inside. He looked very handsome and amiable. A smile played at his pink lips. 

Minho dragged his gaze down and looked at the label on his lab coat: Neurologist Nam Woohyun. For some reason, the word ‘neurologist’ didn’t make Minho so pleased, all it did was make his stomach twist, and he swallows dryly. 

“Hi, Lee Minho, I’m glad to see you are awake,” he says in a friendly way and flashes a bright smile, Minho just narrows his eyes at him, “How are you feeling right now?”

“I’m feeling so great! Wow, you are so handsome! What do you do with your skin because it’s glowing! Are you having a great day? Because I am! Now may you excuse me, I have things to take care of,” Minho says, overdramatically and shifts to get out of the irritating hospital bed, but Chan and Seungmin were quick to handle him and deter him from moving. 

Minho grunts, and with all his might, he squirms around like a worm.

“Damn, Chan, you must work out hard because you’re so strong!” he says with fake enthusiasm. 

“I’ll be right back,” Dr.Nam asserted and swiftly turns to exit the room. 

“Stop acting like a child and calm down; it is all going to be fine,” Chan lectures again.

“I need to get my mom to sue this place for not letting me leave! I hate it here, and what about my cats, huh? They’re all lonely and need me,” Minho protests in a whiny voice.

“You need to get checked up before you leave, you don’t want things to worsen now do you?” Chan says, “And don’t worry about your cats, Jisung said that he wanted to help you out, so he decided to bring your backpack to your place and take care of your cats.” Hearing Jisung’s name for some reason instantly relaxed Minho; even Chan noticed this and gave him a knowing smile. 

“How did he get there?” Minho asks, knowing that it would have been a long walk for Jisung unless he took the bus. 

“I have driven him there. Seungmin accompanied you in the ambulance, and I came to this hospital afterward. You were out for two hours,” Chan explains.

“ _Two hours?_ “ Minho widens his eyes.

“Yeah,” Seungmin confirms.

The neurologist returned with a nurse; they looked at him first, and then they looked at Chan and Seungmin; the expressions on their faces showed confusion of Minho’s sudden shift of his mood. He had to blame it on Jisung, he was his happy medicine. 

“Is he okay now?” Dr.Nam asks; the two nodded, “Okay then. May the two of you step out for a brief moment? I would like to ask him a few questions.” 

Minho wanted them to stick around with him; it was comforting, but he didn’t speak up about it and he remorsefully watched as the two exited the hospital with the nurse. The atmosphere suddenly felt so gloomy. 

“Thank you for being patient. I will ask you a few questions regarding your previous injury and the current one.”

“Go ahead, ask away,” Minho grumbles, wanting to get this all over with. 

The questions asked were pretty similar to the questions he was asked when he injured his head a month ago, but the neurologist also asked him about his mental health and if he experienced any change of mood. He didn’t know if he did or not, has he always been like this? 

He chose to lie as an answer to the questions about his emotions and mental health and answered honestly to the questions about his injuries. He wants a proper diagnosis for his injuries and leave the hospital in tip-top condition. 

His emotions he could fix himself, right? By dealing with it? 

After those questions, the neurologist did some behavioral, reaction, and some other physical tests on him, these tests were nothing new to him as well. The only distinction was that he didn’t encounter any difficulties and did fine with them. 

He heard the result he craved to hear:

“You are perfectly fine, but your headache is a concern, it’s something that rest can fix though. It’s probably a headache due to sensitivity from your previous concussion.”

\--------

“Awe, look who’s happy,” Chan cooed, stating the obvious. Minho found his cutesy babying voice so annoying, however, Minho was too overjoyed to cringe or even complain. He hurries over to his best-friend and wrapped him into a tight hug, not caring if he was squeezing him too much. Chan barely lets out a chuckle and rubs Minho on the back. “This shows me that you’ve gotten good results and aren’t too injured, am I right?” 

“Yeah, you are right,” Minho replies giddily and grips onto the back of Chan’s shirt, “Thank god I didn’t fall from too high. I might rest for this week, though, then officially start dancing again next week.”

“I’m glad you are completely fine, next time please don’t run down the stairs like that.”

“Okay, okay, I won’t.”

“Now will you let me go?” 

“Sorry,” Minho laughs and removes his arms from around Chan. 

\--------

Chan dropped Minho back to his apartment, it felt like a long drive because Minho was urgent to get home. He races into the building, stepped onto the elevator, and got onto the floor his apartment is located on and jogged towards his apartment. Quickly he pressed in the code and unlocked the door. 

What he saw in front of him once he opened the door and stepped inside was such a beautiful, memorable sight. Jisung was fast asleep on the couch with Dori sleeping right on his stomach. If that wasn’t the cutest thing he has ever seen, then what was?

“You’re back,” Jisung mumbles out and grins at him, “Are you okay? Nothing too bad happened, right?”

“Yeah, I’m in tip-top condition, no need to worry, um...thank you for taking care of my cats,” Minho replied and walked towards Jisung and petted Dori on the head, before gently picking it up, letting Jisung be able to sit upright, “Dori must like you a lot.” Minho smiles at Jisung, who only shrugged and laughed. 

“Your cats are so cute,” Jisung cooed. 

“Yeah, I love them so much,” Minho replies and places Dori on the couch. “Are you hungry? I can cook you dinner.”

“No, it’s fine, I think I should get going,” Jisung replies politely as he smoothed his hand over Dori’s back, and stroked her. “I’m glad you are okay. Don’t run down the stairs anymore.”

“Yeah, I won’t,” Minho responds embarrassedly. “I can drop you off if-“ He remembered that his car was back at the university, so he lets out a frustrated groan, and he mentally curses to himself. 

“What’s wrong?”

“I can’t drive you back, my car is still at the University,” Minho sighs. 

“Oh, that’s okay, I can just take the bus.”

“No, you can’t,” Minho blurts, making Jisung baffled. He tried to think of a way to get Jisung to stay. He was so fun to be with, and nice to talk to and Minho wanted to spend as much time with him as he could. Being around him was just so pleasant. “I mean...” he grabs his phone from the coffee table to check the time, “It’s 7 pm, um...isn’t it a little too late?” It wasn’t too late, but Minho hoped Jisung would agree anyway. 

“Yeah, I guess I’ll stay,” Jisung answers. 

“Great, let me cook dinner,” Minho smiles and graciously strolled towards his kitchen to begin cooking dinner. Jisung followed right after him and accompanied him while he cooked. 

Once they finished eating dinner, the two of them headed to Minho’s room and settled onto the bed, and they sat across from each other. 

“Minho, I heard you cry before you ran away, why were you crying? Did something happen?” Jisung suddenly asks. 

Minho didn’t want to answer this question, not only was he embarrassed about having Daekhwa and Jisung catch him cry, but he was also embarrassed about making it such a big deal and fell down the stairs foolishly. He debated to himself if he should answer honestly. 

“The person I love doesn’t love me back, they are already dating someone, and I’m just sitting here pining over it,” Minho says honestly and pouts. He hoped Jisung would get the slightest idea.

“Ah...I’m sorry about that,” Jisung replies. Now that hurt so much, and Minho tried his best not to react to those words. Jisung is pretty oblivious, or maybe Minho wasn’t doing enough. “It’ll work out, Hyung. I’ve already told you this before, but I’d like to repeat it to you again, Minho Hyung, you are a great person. You are caring, loyal, and kind. Eventually, someone will see the charms you have within you.” 

Minho wanted that someone to be Jisung. No one else but him. 

“Really?” He dejectedly asks him, having nothing else to say.

“Really,” Jisung concluded with a firm smile on his lips.   
  
  


When it got late, and when they both grew sleepy, they both decided to sleep. Minho wanted Jisung to sleep on the bed, and after so many protests coming from the blonde, he finally obliged and snuggled in Minho’s bed. Minho wished he could sleep beside Jisung, but he couldn’t because the blonde was dating Daekhwa and Minho knows it would be wrong to sleep with him, while he is in a relationship. 

Minho makes a makeshift bed and laid down. It wasn’t as comfy sleeping on the floor as the bed, but it was manageable.

“Good night,” Minho says.

“Night,” Jisung replies. 

Hoping was just too tiring and too painful, but Minho’s stubborn heart wasn’t going to give up yet. 

\--------

Lunch came around, and Minho was on the second level. He was seated on the floor, his backpack resting beside him, and his notebook on his lap. He was coming up with a crucial plan _again_. He had a new idea, but he was still considering if he should stick with this new plan of his or come up with a different plan. Minho wanted to do something that wouldn’t affect Jisung in any way, or make him angry at him because Minho’s goal was to get him to love him, not hate him. 

The plan he was thinking about was kind of a risky plan. He wanted to tear apart the couple, make them dislike each other somehow. 

Could Minho point out to Jisung that Daekhwa is an evil person who liked to ruin Minho’s mood? Minho knows that would not work, since he is a big jerk to him too; he was always feisty around Daekhwa and fueled his fire. He was always at Daekhwa’s throat whenever the male enraged him. 

“Why hello there, cry baby, Lee Minho.” _Speaking of the rascal_. Minho shuts his notebook angrily, shoves it in his backpack, and snaps his head up at the smirking, silver-haired rat. Minho had so many reasons to just fucking ruin him, “Are you okay after falling down the stairs?” 

“What the fuck do you want now?” 

“Dear Diary, yesterday has been a horrible day. I followed Daekhwa and Jisung and heard everything they talked about. I was so jealous and heart-broken when Daekhwa gave Jisung a necklace as a one-month anniversary gift. I couldn’t hold in my sadness and let my tears out when they heard me. I made a run for it and fell down the stairs,” Daekhwa mocks. 

This didn’t make Minho angry. All of those things were true and it was hurting him. He wanted to cry, but not in front of Daekhwa. He didn’t want to look so weak before his eyes and have him humiliate him even more. 

Was this how Jisung felt when Minho humiliated him? This thought made him so sick. 

“Don’t cry, it’s okay,” Daekhwa says in fake pity. _That’s it!_ Minho stands up and sends him a menacing glare, he tried to appear as scary as he could. He wanted Daekhwa to be frightened to the point he regrets all his words. 

“First came the concussion, and then came the stairs,” Daekhwa sing-songs, as if he wanted Minho to grow angrier, “Has Minho been out of his mind lately? is your brain foggy?”

The brunette steps dead-close towards Daekhwa; the silver-head was about an inch or two taller than Minho, but Minho didn’t feel much at all intimidated by the difference in height, “Keep your ugly silver-haired head out of my motherfucking business. How stupider can you get?” 

“Says the one who fell down the steps, _dumb-ass_ ,” Daekhwa ridicules him with a smirk, “Were you crying because you can’t get your pining dick up Jisung’s ass? Well, too bad too sad, mines already went in his ass.” Minho was absolutely disgusted.

“How can you say that so proudly? What is Jisung even to you? A toy? Do you just use him for your own benefits?”

“Don’t worry; I was gentle. And he is more than a toy to me, I love him and I don’t want your small dick interfering with that. Now get going annoying little shit, go write in that diary of yours and weep.” 

“At least my brain is bigger than yours, you dumb monkey. You say loads of stupid shit,” Minho spat, accepting the fact that he wasn’t big, “Your words are just garbage and disgusting to hear.”

“You wouldn’t have to hear them if you just walk away just turn around and leave, it’s not that hard ‘big brain,’” Daekhwa says, and Minho felt his insides rupture into flames. He was burning furiously, he grit his teeth, and clenched his fists; wanting to punch that fucker in the face. Daekhwa peered at Minho’s hands and then met with his eyes that were showing fire. “ _Awwh_ , do you want to punch me? Go ahead, come on.” 

“I will kill you, motherfucker,” Minho growls, his patience breaking apart piece by piece. He just wanted to hurt him so badly, and have him end up in the hospital and laugh at him. He wanted to see Daekhwa give up and cry, and apologize. But most of all, he wanted his relationship with Jisung to end.

He could literally just smash his fists against Daekhwa; defuse all of his anger onto that bastard - obliterate him, _injure_ him. 

“Hm? Really? Dying at your hands well never happen you fool,” Daekhwa scoffs, “Your dirty, stupid, small hands.” It was so, so, _so_ , tempting, Minho just wanted to smack him and be done, but it was as if his arms were frozen in place. He was unsure about it. 

“Don’t come bothering me again, got it?” Minho says with so much void, and gives him one last vicious, piercing stare and turns away. He hears Daekhwa laugh and calls him names, and even if he was filled with rage, he continued his way, getting away as fast as he could so that he doesn’t make a mistake and end up getting in trouble for assault. 

When he was finally far away, he lets it all out by smashing his fist against the wall and _that_ he regretted because the contact made his hand hurt, he groans in pain and mutters out curses, and seconds later he felt much better. The rage was gone and only left behind a minorly injured knuckle. 

\--------

Hyunjin walked towards the meeting place, and he spots Jeongin seated on the grass, with a book in his hand. It all looked so beautiful: Jeongin reading a book in such a pretty environment, he looked so serene and beautiful, and Hyunjin just wanted to snap a picture of him and cherish it. However, that thought closed on him once Jeongin perked his head and met with Hyunjin’s gaze. The boy smiles at him and gestures for him to sit down with him. 

“Hey, Jeongin,” Hyunjin chirps and settles down next to the younger who immediately wrapped an arm around him and pulled him closer. Hyunjin blushes, and Jeongin chuckles and presses a kiss against his rosy-red cheek. 

“Hello beautiful, how was your day?” he asks and rests his head onto Hyunjin’s shoulder. Hyunjin felt blood rush to his ears at being called beautiful. 

“It was okay. How about you?”

“Fine, I guess,” Jeongin replies. 

Then they fell silent. It wasn’t so awkward; it was peaceful, and Hyunjin used this time to think to himself about how he should tell Jeongin. He wanted to make things clear with him, tell him how much he loves him. Was now even a good time to ask him? Jeongin seemed to be in a blissful mood. He wouldn’t get mad, would he?

“Jeongin,” he starts, Jeongin lifts his head from where it originally rested, and he looks Hyunjin in the eye. Hyunjin wished that the younger didn’t look him in the eye because now he felt his heartbeats quicken in anxiousness and slight fear. 

He needed to let it all out. 

“Hm?” Jeongin hums. 

“I just want to tell you that I love you so much,” Hyunjin says and confirms his words with a bright smile. Jeongin beams and presses a kiss on his lips.

“I love you too,” he replies. 

“Nothing can change my love for you, Jeongin, can you trust me?” Hyunjin places his hand on Jeongin’s thigh. The boy’s eyes were fixated on Hyunjin’s curiously; Hyunjin understands that he was acting pretty odd to Jeongin, it was so weird for him to blurt these words, and it was raising suspicion from the younger. 

“Trust you on what?” Jeongin removes his arm from around Hyunjin and moves to sit across from him, giving his full attention to the taller boy. Hyunjin frowned at the loss of contact but brushed it off. 

“My love for you and only you,” Hyunjin answers. He needed to get straight to the point; whether or not the younger would like it. Hyunjin mentally prepared himself for the disappointment and irritation Jeongin might feel towards him. “I made up with Jisung...” Jeongin tensed at those words, and his eyebrows furrowed, causing Hyunjin’s heart to sink to his stomach. 

“You made up with _him_? Didn’t I tell you how he is like? He wouldn’t want to be friends with you, he could be pretending and might stab you on the back, I don’t want that happening to you baby, I don’t want you to be sad because of him,” he says with so much disappointment in his voice, it causes Hyunjin’s cheeks to feel so hot, he wanted to cry. 

“Jeongin, I’ve known him for so long, he isn’t like that, he is understanding, and he is dating too,” Hyunjin tries to reason with him, “He even told me he likes me only as a friend, nothing more. Jeongin, there is nothing for you to worry about.” 

“Nothing for me to worry about?” Jeongin stands up, “I’m uncomfortable with him! Do you not understand my feelings? I’ve cared about you so much, I’ve shown how much I loved you, but you here are hurting me.” _Loved?_ Did that mean Jeongin didn’t love him anymore? “I’ll get going now.” 

“Jeongin, please,” Hyunjin gazed up at him with tear-filled eyes. Jeongin shook his head, gave him once glance that broke Hyunjin’s heart, and walked away. 

Hyunjin broke out into sobs and grabbed the sharp green grass from beneath him and pulled at it; ripping the strands from the ground. He couldn’t believe this was happening; he couldn’t believe Jeongin didn’t love him anymore. Why couldn’t Jeongin trust him? Why couldn’t he understand that Hyunjin loved him a lot?

“Hyunjin.” He lets the grass he ripped off fall onto the ground and he peers up at Felix, who looked entirely concerned for him. The younger knelt in front of him. “I saw what happened, are you okay?” 

Hyunjin couldn’t find his voice. The word ‘loved’ still struck him, it was like a slap to his face, it broke him. None of that could be true, could it? It has to be a nightmare, Jeongin didn’t mean his words, did he? 

“Do you want to talk about it?” Hyunjin furiously shakes his head, causing his tears to stream down his cheeks. 

“What’s wrong?!” Another voice shouted, dragging Hyunjin from his thoughts. Both Felix and Hyunjin turned and saw Jisung jogging right towards them. The blonde looked at Felix, whose face tensed at his presence. Hyunjin didn’t get why Felix was behaving this way towards Jisung; Jisung did nothing wrong. 

“Hyunjin,” Jisung breathes, and knelt beside Hyunjin; he rested his hand onto Hyunjin’s shoulder and gave him such worry-filled look. “Is everything okay, you don’t look so well.”

“Wait, things between you two are good now?” Felix asks, and looks at Jisung and then at Hyunjin, “I’m so confused.” 

“Yeah, why?” Jisung raises a brow.

“Nothing,” Felix replies, and narrows his eyes at Jisung in suspicion before he stands up, “I’ll head off now, I hope you feel better Hyunjin, and if you want to vent out, text or call me, I’ll listen.” Hyunjin smiles up at him appreciatively.

Once Felix walked away, Jisung stood up and outstretches his hand for Hyunjin to grab. The older held onto it, and Jisung helped him up. “Let’s go.” 

Besides the occasional sniffling and the sound of their steps, their walk was tranquil. The quietness was peaceful enough for his mind, as his mind was filled with sad thoughts. He was glad Jisung was patient with him and didn’t bombard him with so many questions and helped him out. 

The two of them stepped inside their dorm; Jisung respecting that Hyunjin didn’t seem to want to say anything yet, headed over to his bed and went on his phone. Hyunjin also headed towards his own bed and dropped onto it. He fiddles with his phone, wondering if he should text Jeongin an apology or not. Was it too early to do so? Maybe it is. He puts it aside, thinking it’d be best to talk to Jeongin when he has cooled down. 

“If Jeongin said ‘loved’, and if he is mad at me, does that mean we’ve broken up?” Hyunjin desperately asks in a panic-filled voice and picks at his fingers. Jisung removed himself from his bed and walked over to Hyunjn’s and sat down beside him. 

“I honestly don’t know,” Jisung responds, “Maybe he just said it out of anger. I’m sure he still loves you a lot, he is protective of you as we may already know. But why exactly is he mad at you, you wouldn’t mind explaining, would you?” 

Hyunjin explained everything that happened, not missing any detail as he was anxious and guilt-filled. Jisung didn’t look so happy with the explanation, and his lips were in a flat line. 

“He is completely messed up, and there is nothing you need to apologize about, Hyung,” Jisung scoffs, “He is deciding things for you, and isn’t understanding how _you_ feel. He has a big problem with me, although I don’t like you _that_ way. I know you love him a lot, but I think it’s best if you consider keeping your distance from him for a while.” 

“I don’t think I can, Jisung-ah, it hurts me,” Hyunjn sighs dejectedly, “I love him too much. Maybe he’ll forgive me?”

The hope in Hyunjin’s voice was just too much and Jisung felt tremendous amounts of sorrow for him. It seemed like he was blinded by Jeongin’s affection and ensured himself that Jeongin was doing it all out of _love_. How could Hyunjin love someone so possessive like Jeongin? All that boy did was tell Hyunjin who or who not to be with. It’s all wild, and what sort of love was that? 

Not wanting to make Hyunjin much more upset, he decides to say, “I understand.” When he didn’t. 

\--------

Hyunjin walked through the halls, still feeling so gloomy. He turned towards the cafeteria. “Hyunjin.” A familiar voice calls out for him; like a happy puppy, Hyunjin feels himself perk up at the voice. He turns around and sees Jeongin speed-walking towards him. “I’m so sorry about yesterday, I shouldn’t have hurt you.” 

Without thinking, Hyunjin just smiled in return, all his gloom washed away, “It’s okay; I know I made you upset. I’m sorry about it.” Jeongin grabs Hyunjin’s hand and squeezes it. Even at this little gesture, Hyunjin felt his heart flutter. “Things are okay between us now, right? I was so scared that we’ve broken up.” Jeongin’s widens his eyes at those words.

“Oh god, I’m so sorry,” Jeongin frowns and cups Hyunjin’s face, “I would never break your heart like that, you are precious to me. I love you a lot.” 

Hyunjin was happy - very, very, happy. He was happy that things between him and Jeongin were okay now, and it delighted him that they haven’t broken up. There is no one so sweet like Jeongin. 

“I love you too,” Hyunjin responds.

“I thought about what you said, and I’m sorry. I know Jisung means a lot to you, so I’ll let you be friends with him if that makes you happy.” This is what Hyunjin wanted to hear for so long. He appreciated how Jeongin will let him freely be friends with Jisung. Jisung meant a lot to Hyunjin, just like how Jeongin did. “But.” Hyunjin freezes at that word, his happiness at the edge, threatening to fall.

“Wherever you go, you must tell me and send a picture of yourself and whoever you’re with,” Jeongin states, and retracts his hand from Hyunjin’s face. 

This triggered Hyunjin. Not only was that going to be so weird, but that provided a hint that he still doesn’t fully trust Hyunjin around others. “Could you do that for me?” Jeongin waits for his answer, his gaze soft yet somehow making Hyunjin feel so uneasy. Hyunjin nods. It couldn’t be hard, could it?

“I love you,” Jeongin says and presses a kiss against Hyunjin’s lips, “You mean so much to me.”

“I love you too, Jeongin, always.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The biggest jerk award goes to...Daekhwa! :(
> 
> A lot of things are going to happen in the next chapter, things will downfall but there were be some great things happening too, mainly to three characters. 
> 
> As you can see I added new tags and one of them is a 'possible death' Let's say a character may or may not die, and there will be hints within the next few chapters. It may be one of these characters: Minho, Jisung, Jeongin, Hyunjin, or Felix. 
> 
> Let the mystery begin~! 
> 
> I hope you enjoyed this chapter and I hope you will enjoy the exciting upcoming chapters! ^^


	17. Friends that aren't truly friends

Exhaustion. 

Stress.

The midterm week dragged by slowly, but in the end, he was eventually set free. Minho could finally relax after studying his ass off to bring up his grades, especially in Physics. He barely passed that exam, nevertheless, he was proud of himself for passing, making him change his mind about dropping out of that stress-packed, equation-filled class late in the semester. All that late-night studying and cramming in information was worth it. The outcomes were magnificent. 

Other than that, there was something else he was quite enthused about. 

It was the fact that everything between Hyunjin and Jisung was okay now and it lifted Minho's spirits. He understands how the two are inseparable - precious to each other. Even if problems are set blazing between them, within some time, they come back to each other in one swift motion like the powerful winds. Minho loved seeing such a bright bond; it was something that was making him so festive on the inside. 

From a distance, Minho sees how the two are eating lunch together again, with Jeongin scowling next to Hyunjin (although that went unnoticed by Hyunjin.) But of course, Jisung just _had_ to bring Daekhwa along with him to that table and introduce him to them. That bastard with a full-on "polite" smile heartily greeted them. That was one thing Minho wasn't so enthused about. Because of Daekhwa, Minho chose to abandon that table and sit with his wonderful and interesting dance friends. 

As long as Daekhwa sticks at that table like sap, Minho wasn't going to jump in that hive that contained a pesky wasp. Once that wasp is out, _then_ Minho would consider returning. 

Even if things are fine within the two shining, golden best friends; nothing changed Seungmin and Felix's mindsets, they were unfazed with him and looked at the now blue-haired Jisung as if he were some sort of unwelcomed pest. 

In reality, Seungmin and Felix are the pests, and Jisung is a sweet little blueberry - Minho just adores Jisung's blue-hair, it looked so beautiful on him. 

\-------

"Hey! Look here!" Hyunjin exclaimed even when it was unnecessary - Felix and Minho were literally walking next to him. Hyunjin jogged towards the giant bulletin and gapes at it as if it were a _fine_ art-work. He then points at one of the papers stapled on that board. "They are looking for volunteers to help set up for the festival next Friday!" Minho grimaces at his boisterous tone. 

"Really?" Felix joins in next to Hyunjin, "I want to do that!" 

"Set up for a festival?" Minho steps behind them and looks at the paper - half-filled with twenty names of people who wanted to help out. _Boring and too much work_ , Minho thinks.

Hyunjin pulls out a pen from his backpack and signs up for it and then hands the pen to Felix for him to sign up too. They then look at Minho expectantly, and he gives the paper one last peek before he turns his gaze towards the two. "I'll pass, too lazy for it." And he proceeds to walk away. 

" _Minho Hyung,_ come back here! You should take a look at each of the names," Hyunjin calls out for him. Minho pauses in his steps, rolls his eyes and swings back around. What the hell was Hyunjin trying to indicate? He didn't want to look at the names, they were none of his business, but something in him drove him to head back towards the bulletin board and look at all the listed names, maybe Hyunjin was trying to point out something important?

 _Park Chaeyoung...Lee Siyeon...Park Seonghwa...Bang Chan...Han Jisung_ -

Minho blinks in surprise upon seeing Jisung's name on there. He snatches Hyunjin's pen and signs up for the festival set up as well and returns his pen. Hyunjin cackles, and Felix looked utterly confused. 

"What was the about? What made him sign up?" Felix throws questions at the raven-haired boy. 

"Nothing you need to know," Hyunjin responds and walks ahead. 

"Hey! I want to know! Tell me!" He shouts as he follows behind him, "Sometimes, I don't understand you, Hyunjin Hyung!" 

_Me either_ , Minho thinks. 

\--------

It came time. After staring at that same lunch table for the following few days, Minho decided it was time to set himself loose from these troublesome emotions that were only bringing him down. Jisung was content with who he was with; Daekhwa is a loyal prince, and Minho could no longer compare himself to that wasp anymore. 

Minho felt that he wasn't emotionally well, let alone mentally. He felt the urge to vent out to someone, therefore with tear-filled eyes, he pulls out his phone and calls someone he trusted with all his heart, "C-chan Hyung, can you come over?" Minho asks in such a wavery voice, and he tried his best not to let out a single sob. 

"Of course, I'll be there in a bit," Chan responds quickly. Minho hangs up on him, drops his phone onto the coffee table in front of him before he sinks back against the back cushions of the couch and thinks about how to tell Chan everything. 

When Soonie climbed onto his lap, he felt slighter better. Having the cats he loved so much was so comforting. He scratches Soonie on the head and then retracts his hand from the soft fur. 

"I hope I'll be able to feel so much better once I let my words out," Minho mutters to Soonie, who only meowed, "It will be hard, though."

When Chan came over, Minho greeted him with a smile, "I'm glad you made it here." 

Chan walked towards the couch and sat down next to Minho. Soonie looked at him and then leaped off of Minho's lap. "Soonie must hate me." he playfully pouts.

"No, I don't think so," Minho laughs. 

"So, how are you doing?" 

"Not so great," Minho confesses, "These past few days were just a huge jumble of a mess for me. Everything is just too overwhelming." 

"How so? What exactly is this mess that is making you feel this way?" 

"My emotions and actions." Chan hums as a response, and nods at Minho to continue. "You might already know this; I love Jisung. Like _a lot_. But you also may know this; he is dating Daekhwa. It's making me feel so angry and jealous because Jisung is someone I love so much. But he already has someone he loves. This isn't the only problem. I feel like I am going insane! It feels like my entire world revolves around them, and only them, I think about them all day. I _hope_ for things all day," Minho laughs but in a sad way, showing how downhearted he felt, and Chan looked at him worriedly, "Crooked hopes you can say. This is all getting tiring. I can't go a day without thinking about them! I don't know what to do about it anymore!" Minho breaks apart, and Chan collected him into his arms and rubs circles on his back. Minho couldn't speak anymore, his throat felt so tight, he could barely even breathe, and only sobs emerged from his mouth. 

"It's okay...it's okay..." Chan says soothingly, "Take your time...I'll be here as long as you need." 

"I just don't get it. My jealously lead me to get him to love me instead. I even tried to be like Daekhwa, but that was too hard. His positives are my positives. Jisung even claims that I am nice, sweet, so I gave up on trying to be like Daekhwa, there wasn't any point because _apparently_ my personality is good enough to Jisung. Guess what? He still doesn't love me that way!" he sniffles and then pauses. Chan stays quiet and continues to rub circles on his back. This gesture only makes Minho cry harder, and he grabs onto the back of the blonde's shirt tightly, trying to suppress himself somehow. 

"You know how I now dress in a lot of pastels? I don't even like it! I just did it for Jisung because he says pastel looks good on me. I thought that would make him like me, but it didn't, and he still loves that piece of trash. I don't get it, what's so good about Daekhwa? He is a hell dog. I can't fucking stand him; sometimes I just want to quit the dance club because of him; because he always makes me feel humiliated and worthless. He picks on me a lot and mocks my injuries, thinking that it is all funny." 

"What the fuck," Chan growls. 

Minho ignores him and continues speaking, "Why can't I stop thinking about Daekhwa and Jisung? Why can't I stop thinking about destroying their pretty romance? Sometimes I think I am the biggest monster here! Sometimes I just want to die."

"Minho. You're not a monster, and no please don't think about dying, okay? You mean _so_ much to me. I love you a lot, and I don't know what I would do without a unique light to my life. Without you, all of my lights would turn off." Minho grits his teeth to stop crying, but it fails, and he presses his face firmly onto Chan's shoulder to conceal the sounds. Chan sighs, and Minho hears him sniffle, causing his heart to crack. "I'll be honest; you are obsessing over them too much. Let your stubborn inner feelings go; let your mind breathe. You need to let things go even when it feels challenging to do so, okay?" Minho whimpers, and Chan's hand leaves his back and rests onto the back of Minho's head. 

"Most of all, you need to be yourself, or at least be what you are comfortable with. Jisung isn't the type of person who judges by outer appearances, and even if he does like pastel on you, that doesn't mean you have to wear it _every single day_. You are still Lee Minho, no matter what type of clothes you wear. You are good enough, Minho. I've known you for so long and tell you what you are worth more than those dark thoughts that are eating you up on the inside. You are Lee Minho, the person who is brave and has the biggest heart. So let your true self shine and combat those emotions." 

"I'm not so strong," Minho pulls away, "I'm so childish. I'm a life-ruiner, I feel like a complete jerk," Minho murmurs without thinking - only because he felt so awful.

"You aren't those things! I'm not saying non-sense here. I wouldn't. I am being completely honest. You are so special, unique. You don't need to be someone you're not. Daekhwa is himself, Jisung is himself, I am myself, and Minho, you are yourself. Don't force yourself to change just to have someone fall in love with you. You got that?"

"Mhm."

"So remove those pastels, don't think about what others think about you, and throw on a big smile," Chan says and wipes away Minho's tears for him. Minho rubs his runny nose. "Silly." Chan chuckles. 

"What do you think I should do? I really like Jisung...I want to be with him, and I feel like trying my hardest to get him to love me," Minho spills out his words honestly, he wanted to let out what he feels and hear what Chan thinks about it. "I don't feel like I can let go of him even when he is taken by someone." 

"You don't have to stop loving him, Minho," Chan replies and rubs his thumb onto the fabric of Minho's couch, "Loving him is your choice, and I don't want to tell you to stop. What I think is best for you is to stop obsessing over him, it's obviously hurting you a lot. And it's not getting you anywhere, all it is doing is making you feel so compressed. Don't exactly try to stop thinking about him and forget him, but just try limiting yourself from overly thinking about him and do something else instead like focus on what you love doing, like dancing. Take things casually, not obsessively." 

Reminiscing about it, Minho did feel like he was too obsessive over Jisung. He thinks about him throughout the majority of his days. He gets sad when he sees him with his boyfriend. Chan was right; this wasn't getting him anywhere. 

"Thank you for spending your time listening to me," Minho smiles.

Chan softly chuckles and mirrors the smile, "I'm glad you understand, and I'm happy you finally reached out to me. Now tell me about Daekhwa. He seems pretty cool and nice, but has he actually been humiliating you?"

"Yeah, he frequently mocks me," Minho frowns, "He is so happy that I am no longer captain, he has captured that role and is rubbing that fact on my face." 

"That's so bad. I'm so frustrated. I can't believe he treated you this way."

Minho laughs sadly, "Maybe I deserve it. I was mean to him too."

"That doesn't mean he should humiliate you for the unfortunate things that happened to you. It's none of his business."

"You're right," Minho replies.

"I'll speak to him."

"No!" Minho shouts, "You can't."

"Why can't I?"

"I'll deal with it on my own," Minho replies.

"Oh _sure_ , you've been dealing with things on your own pretty well, huh?" Chan says sarcastically, Minho flattens his mouth into a line. "I'll talk to him." 

\--------

Right when dance class concluded, Hyunjin picked up his bag and waited for Felix to walk up to him. The white-haired boy caught up with him, and the two walked side-by-side. "Seungmin and I need to talk to you about something," he starts speaking.

"Really? About what?" Hyunjin replies nervously, worried about what it would be about. He didn't want to get too ahead of himself, but Felix's voice sounded too grave, and it was giving him too many undesired anxieties. 

Felix doesn't respond to his question, but once they approached the cafeteria, Hyunjin noticed that Seungmin was already there, leaning against the wall. Once he saw the two, he stepped towards them and looked at Hyunjin. Felix stood beside Seungmin and gazed at Hyunjin too, making him feel so small, even though he was taller than both of them. 

"We're so sorry about Jisung," Seungmin starts. _What in the hell?_ Hyunjin furrowed his eyebrows at them, not understanding what they were trying to pinpoint. 

"What do you mean?" Hyunjin replies, "What did he even do? I'm sure he didn't do anything."

"I'm sorry that you have to deal with someone like him. Is he forcing you to be friends with him?" Seungmin asks. Hyunjin was utterly perplexed. He felt like he didn't hear things right. Jisung doing this to him? No way! What kind of non-sense was he speaking about?

"He isn't forcing anything, Seungmin!" Hyunjin replies angrily, "What has gotten into you? You know him well, like me. He isn't that type of person! You two really do dislike him, right? What did he even do to you guys? The last time I checked, he was trying to be the nicest he can to you! He is so confused, and honestly, it's hurting me so much!" He felt tears fall from his eyes, and he quickly wipes them away. "When you," he points at Felix, "Talked about hanging out, you didn't even mention his name and made him feel so upset and left out." 

"That's because he is a jealous piece of shit to you!" Felix shot back, "He is guilting you, am I right? You can tell us the truth, and we will deal with him, we will make sure he doesn't manipulate you anymore."

"I am telling you the truth! He didn't do anything wrong to me!" Hyunjin shouts back, not caring about the passing students gazes directed at him. "Think about things before assuming!" He storms off to the long line to order his lunch. 

"I feel so bad for him. Jisung must have forced Hyunjin to be friends with him or something, I feel like that rascal is trying to ruin him and his relationship with Jeongin just because he is jealous," Felix scoffs, "Pathetic." 

Seungmin stays silent and thinks about everything. He was unsure about this situation, but he knows one thing, Hyunjin was telling the truth, he doesn't lie. _Weird_.

\--------

"Are you two excited to perform at the festival?" Chan asks. They were at a restaurant, celebrating the fact that they've got accepted to perform at the festival next week. Performing in front of others was something Jisung fantasized about doing, but he was feeling super nervous on the inside. This meant that he was going to be performing in front of hundreds or even thousands of people; they will all be staring at him.

The early anxiety was filling inside of him dauntingly slow. His heartbeats were hurrying, and he pushes his tongue onto the roof of his mouth. _Snap out of it_ , he tells himself. He wanted to be calm right now. He tries to bury his emotions. 

"Yeah, I'm very excited!" Changbin says happily, "I hope people will start recognizing us."

"Well, this festival is going to be big. I believe it will give us an audience," Chan reasons. "Let's work hard and practice for it. Should we dance too?" 

" _Dance?_ No, definitely not," Changbin whines, "I don't think I can dance." 

"We can just do an easy dance. Jisung, what do you think? Should we include a dance? It will make our performance much more impressive, don't you think? If you don't agree too, it's okay we can reconsider and perform without any dancing." 

"I don't mind," Jisung replies, "Dancing might look cool with our song."

"Changbin? Do you agree?" Chan asks him.

"Looks like I don't have a choice," Changbin shrugs, "Let's dance then." He looks at Jisung darkly before he eats his food. 

"Alright, dancing we will do," Chan replies and notices Jisung's troubled appearance, "Jisung, are you okay? You've been talking so minimally, how come?" 

"I'm fine, Hyung. There isn't much for me to talk about anyway." It wasn't because of that. For the past few minutes, Changbin would occasionally give him dirty looks, not liking his presence at all. Jisung didn't know why Changbin started hating him this much. 

"Changbin, let's talk outside," Chan says, "Jisung, you wait here." Jisung nods as a response and takes out his phone to keep himself occupied.

"Do you think I'm stupid?" Chan asks the shorter boy once they were outside in front of the restaurant. 

"Wait, what?" 

"You and Jisung have some problems with each other, don't you? Why does Jisung seem uncomfortable around you?"

"Maybe he thinks I'm intimidating," Changbin says. 

"Yeah right. When we first met him, you were getting along with him pretty well, and now all of a sudden, he is your mortal enemy for no reason. Did you drag Seungmin and Felix to hate him too? I've noticed that they have been ignoring him too." 

"Fine!" Chanbgin groans and pulls out his phone, he taps at it and pulls up a picture and shows it to Chan. It was a picture of text messages from someone else's phone, probably Felix's. "Jisung isn't that nice angel as you may think he is. He is completely corrupt!"

Chan grabs Changbin's phone and reads the text messages and widens his eyes. He now understood everything. All of his inquiries were answered. Hyunjin and Jisung did have something going on between each other several weeks ago. This was why Seungmin, Felix, and Changbin were behaving like this and turned away from Jisung. Could Jeongin be telling the truth? Chan didn't think so, Jisung wasn't ruthless, and he wasn't even the type to act like this if Jisung was doing this to Hyunjin then why had he been the one looking so hurt, fearful, and confused.

"And you believe this?" Chan scoffs, "With no validation?!" He hands the phone back to him. 

"Did you not read over it properly? Jisung was jealous of Jeongin and Hyunjin dating each other! He was the one who avoided him, unhappy that the two are in a relationship!" 

"Or maybe it is Jeongin wanting to push people away from Jisung! Why did he add Seungmin and Felix into this group chat? Because they are Jisung's friends! He wanted them to hate him, that's why he texted all of that bullshit. Who in their right mind would do that?" Chan responds, "Jeongin literally only focuses on Hyunjin! I've sensed something weird between Hyunjin and Jeongin, but I thought I was just overthinking it all. How could I be so gullible." 

"I don't know what to say..." Changbin mumbles, "I'm so stupid."

"Yes, you are!" Chan frowns, " _Very_ stupid. But to be fair, I'm stupid too." 

\--------

Hyunjin was busy doing his own thing: Watching dramas on Netflix after finishing his reading. When a knock sounded on his door, he sighs, pauses the video, and quickly made his way to the door to open it. It was Seungmin standing there. Hyunjin was quite surprised to see him here at this time, but they lived in the same dormitory building anyway. 

"Hey, what's wrong?" Hyunjin asks when he notices how fidgety Seungmin was and how distressed he looked. 

"I need to talk to you."

"About what? Jisung?" Hyunjin scoffs, "Please don't tell me how-"

"It's not that. I was wrong this whole time. I was so mean to him without any good reason, I'm a bad friend," Seungmin says. Hyunjin frowns at him and then gestures for him to step inside. Seungmin makes his way over to Hyunjin's bed and sits down, and Hyunjin shut the door and walked over to the brown-haired boy and stood in front of him. 

"Go ahead, tell me more."

"Felix and I were acting so mean to him for a long time," Seungmin starts, Hyunjin's expression hardens. Seungmin explained everything and even shows Hyunjin a text message that came from Jeongin. When Hyunjin finished reading it, he stumbled back in shock and felt his mind spin wildly. The shock he was feeling was so devastating, and he felt so sick to his stomach. He clamps his mouth over his mouth, whimpers, and races to the bathroom. 

"Hyunjin!" Seungmin calls out for him. Hyunjin disregarded him and dropped in front of the toilet and threw up into it. He heaves as tears rushed down his face. He felt like he was stuck in a nightmare and just wanted to escape. Why was this happening? Why is Jeongin like this?

Seungmin rushed to his side and knelt next to him and continuously asked if he was alright, but Hyunjin couldn't respond. He threw up once more in the toilet, and now feeling the exhaustion piling up inside of him, he presses his cheek against the toilet and continues crying. The coldness of the bathroom engulfed him. He felt insecure, hurt, and, most of all, ripped apart due to the loss of trust. 

He hears the door open. He knows it is Jisung.

"What's going?!" Jisung says in a panicked voice and rushes into the bathroom. 

"It's my fault," Seungmin speaks, his voice sounding so strained. 

"Yeah, you better apologize!" Hyunjin cries and wipes away his tears, but it was pointless because more tears raced down his cheeks. He stands up; his legs were unsteady; Seungmin sought to support him, but Hyunjin furiously shoves him away and rushes out of the bathroom. 

He headed towards his closet and put on a hoodie. He turns to Seungmin, "Send me a screenshot of that text, and you tell Jisung everything you told me!" He then looks at Jisung, "We will talk later. I'm going to talk to Jeongin." Hyunjin leaves the dorm, shutting the door behind him loudly. 

"Seungmin, what do you need to say to me?" Jisung asks him. 

The younger looked down in guilt, and Jisung sees his tears prickle onto the floor, but he does eventually tell him everything and even apologizes to him. 

Jisung's face felt completely hot, his cheeks were burning, and tears collected in his eyes, "You trusted Jeongin's words? Without telling Hyunjin or me?" Seungmin nods as a reply and bites onto his bottom lip as more tears fell from his eyes. "We knew each other since high school, Seungmin. Do you see me as this type of person? Getting jealous over Hyunjin dating Jeongin? That's not cool." 

"I...I...I'm sorry, Hyung," Seungmin sobs. 

Jisung shuts his eyes, letting more tears slip from them, "Leave." He doesn't hear Seungmin move, so he opens his eyes and glares at him, "Leave!" He screams. Seungmin jolts back and nods in understanding before leaving the dorm. Jisung sighed and landed onto his knees and stared blankly straight ahead. 

\--------

Hyunjin ran towards Jeongin's dorm, wanting to make it there as promptly as possible even when his sides were cramping, and even when he was weak and exhausted, it was the rage that was making him proceed with this intense running. 

When he reaches Jeongin's place, he knocks on the door, and seconds later, Jeongin opened it. Hyunjin shot him a glare, and Jeongin raised a brow.

"What's the matter?" He asks so casually, making the fury inside of Hyunjin strike up.

" _What's the matter?_ You lied to Seungmin and Felix!" Hyunjin shouts, "How could you?"

"Lie to them about what?" He replies. Hyunjin knows that the younger is pretending not to know, and that was so ridiculous, it was making Hyunjin grow impatient and much more annoyed. 

He shows him the screenshot Seungmin sent him, and Jeongin paled. "Now you get it?! Why did you have to lie to them! Not only did you crush Jisung's friendship with them, but now you lost my fucking trust! Minho was right; you are very insecure. I've told you that I love you and only you, but you don't even believe me! And this text? You disappoint me, Jeongin! If hurting my friends is your way of keeping me to yourself, I think we shouldn't date each other anymore! I hate you!" That was a lie; he couldn't hate him.

"Hyunjin..."

"Let's break up," Hyunjin turns away, tears slipped from his eyes. He strolled through the hall, ignoring Jeongin, who was begging for him to stop and listen to him. Hyunjin wasn't going to listen to him, nor did he want to hear any of his stupid apologies. He was done with him and his behavior that Hyunjin was previously blinded by with the sugar-coatings of lies and fake assurances. 

_"Hyunjin, please wait."_

Hyunjin exits the building. 

_"Hyunjin!"_

He violently swipes at his tears. 

"Hyunjin!" He hears Jeongin's footsteps near and starts picking up his pace to get away fast. He ran through the sidewalk as quickly as he could - like a hungry beast was chasing him. The desperation in Jeongin's voice as he called out for him made much more tears group in Hyunjin's eyes, blurring his vision. He didn't blink them away and continued his way, and when he crashed into a pole, he curses as he rubs his nose that was throbbing in pain. 

"Hyunjin..." Jeongin caught up to him, "Please don't run away, I need you to listen to me," he grips onto Hyunjin's wrist. He tries to rip away Jeongin's hand from his wrist, but it wasn't working because his grip was firm. "I'm sorry-"

"Cut the crap! Stop with the apologizing! It is pointless! It's not going to change my hatred towards you, you liar!" Hyunjin shouts, "Don't even bother talking to me again. We are done! I've broken up with you, now leave me alone and go find someone else to be with that can deal with your shit, Yang Jeongin!" Hyunjin sees how Jeongin's lip wobbled and how his eyes filled with tears. Seeing that was undeniably painful, he started to feel like he was the villain with such a venomous mouth. 

When the grip on his wrist loosened, Hyunjin didn't use this opportunity to walk away. The two stood there in complete silence, staring at each other. The tears falling from the younger's eyes were like a blow to Hyunjin's heart. He sighs, lifts Jeongin's face, and presses a firm kiss onto the lips. 

"Good night," Hyunjin says, "Sleep well and learn to trust." He then walks away without looking back. What was once he thought was a sweet angel that cared about him turned out to be a monster who hurt people for the satisfaction for himself - wanting to keep what he called "precious" to himself - locked in a cage keeping an eye on him, refraining him from being around those he loved. 

Maybe they were never really meant for each other. 

\--------

"Hyunjin!" Jisung says worriedly once the said person stepped inside the dorm and closes the door behind him gently. Jisung walks over to him. "Is everything alright?"

Hyunjin walked over to his bed and sat down on the edge and pressed his hands against the sides of his head, "I'm sorry about everything. I should've been more aware of Seungmin and Felix's behavior towards you. I regret taking this all lightly. I was so confused myself. I'm sorry that you had to travel through all this pain by yourself."

"Don't apologize, you're not at fault," Jisung replies and sits next to him.

"Easy for you to say." Hyunjin lets out a sigh. "I feel like I'm responsible for all of this. So, how did your conversation with Seungmin go?" 

Jisung purses his lips at the conversation, "Not so well, I don't think I will forgive him or even Felix. I feel so bad for thinking this way."

"It's okay. I'm mad at them as well; they should've shown me the text earlier, at least. I'm so sorry about this all, I should've considered Minho's words, he knew how Jeongin was acting and me being with him all the time didn't even budge and thought he was just showing me love when all he was doing was making me feel chained to him. He is insecure," Hyunjin says, "I broke up with him. I thought it would be best to end things with him." Jisung widens his eyes a bit at what Hyunjin just said. "I can't stand being around him anymore. He is addicted to me. But funny enough, I'm addicted to him too. Even though I broke up with him, my heart is still pulling me towards him."

"It's okay to still love him after what he has done," Jisung replies assuringly. 

"Has he been mistreating you?" Hyunjin asks, "Threatened you in any way?" Jisung thinks about it; Jeongin approached him twice and said some nasty things to him, but he wasn't going to give Hyunjin the full story. 

"He did treat me badly, but never really threatened me. Once, he did approach me in the bathroom and said some things, but Minho was there at that time and got angry at him."

"Minho is such a good person," Hyunjin smiles.

"Yeah, he has been there for..." Jisung pauses. 

"What's wrong?" Hyunjin asks. 

Minho stuck to Jisung in the dark and tried his best to pick him up when he was sad. He always gave him such an enchanting smile and always asked him if he was okay. 

Lee Minho, a name that lightened Jisung's day. Always.

He isn't his third favorite person. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jisung might be feeling something... :o
> 
> I hope you enjoyed this chapter, I had so much fun writing this one although I felt so sad with the breakup part :(


	18. Lips that feel nice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for a slightly late update. This chapter is pretty long, so many things will happen in this chapter, a lot of sad things.
> 
> I hope you enjoy this 9.8k worded clutter of a chapter, and sorry if there are any grammar errors, I read over it twice, but the second time I read over it hurriedly because I wanted to get this chapter out today

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Smut

Chan's advice turned out to be immeasurably helpful; it did pull Minho from his deep depths of despair - but temporarily - he slipped right back into his hole quite rapidly. Obsessions are obsessions; they tormented his mind minute by minute, and it was just out of his control. He couldn't escape from this mentality of his even when he wanted to. He felt like he was carrying a rock on his head, the intrusive feelings and repetitive thoughts were pressing him down.

This obsession of his was pulling him back to the start. Controlling his emotions better? Easier said than done.

Due to his long-talk and vast experience with Chan a few days back, he decided to call him again, knowing that his best friend cared about him. He pressed the call button on Chan's contact, and again, they talked for minutes, or probably for an hour - Minho didn't count up the time.

Gratefulness was what he felt. Chan was that one friend of his who would go through a lot to pull Minho back up to his feet. Of course, he is willing to spend any minute of his day listening to all of Minho's babbling and annoying wails. He loved the fact that Chan was patient with him.

Chan understood that it was hard for Minho to move on from his feelings this quickly. He couldn't erase Jisung in his obsessive mind at all.

However, Chan did figure out a way to help him; at first, Minho wasn't as fond of that idea, but he forced that plan into himself. It couldn't go too wrong, could it?

✩

Wednesday.

His living room was a huge mess. It was not necessarily _huge_ , but all around him were crumbled pieces of paper tossed away in defeat and stress because the lyrics he was writing weren't turning out the way he wanted them to turn out. Writing songs wasn't as easy as he thought it would be; this was such a massive, extremely stressful task - mainly because he wanted it _perfect_.

He was lazing on his couch, done with writing lyrics, only coming up with four lines. It was okayish progress, but it was still disappointing. Only four lines in three hours?

He picked up his notebook and placed it onto the coffee table in front of him and shifts so that he was lying on his side, facing the tv that wasn't even on. He didn't want to turn it on and only stared at the screen blankly, viewing the reflection of himself, mocking him for being such a lazy slump. He grumbles and shifts again so that he is in his original position and stares at the ceiling.

A knock at his door was something that sent him out of his couch, and he dragged himself towards the front door. He wondered who it could be at this time - it could be Chan, wanting to make sure if he was okay or not or check up on him about his lyrics, which he had only made minimal progress in. Seeing Chan behind that door was highly expected.

He opened the door and was shocked to see soft-looking blue-hair, big-brown eyes, and a shy smile right before his eyes. "Hi, Hyung~," Jisung chirps, and that was enough to send Minho's heart pumping eagerly at his chest.

"Hi, what brings you here?" Minho asks and steps aside to let the blue-haired boy inside.

"I've been thinking about you a lot lately," Jisung says nonchalantly.

Wait a minute...did Minho hear this right? Or was his brain being a fool to him like usual and was altering Jisung's words? Those words were too good to be true. His mind must be stirring up the words; it was rare to hear those things from Jisung.

"Really?" Minho stupidly replies; he just wanted confirmation.

"Yeah," Jisung giggles, oh how sweet it sounded to Minho's ears. "I appreciate you a lot Hyung, you've helped me so much, even when I didn't ask for your help. You make me feel so well and honestly, make my days brighter!" His eyes sparkled with joy, and the smile was making Minho feel weak on the inside. He didn't know what to say. All he could think was how delightful it was to see Jisung this happy and thankful for Minho. "As a way to thank you...I bought you something, a gift!" He reaches into his hoodie pocket and pulls out a cat plushie keychain. "I had a hard time trying to find something you'd like, so I thought about how you loved your cats so much and decided to get you something cat-like. I see how you look at your cats with so much love and affection; it's just too cute."

He hands Minho the gift. "I hope you like this." He feels the small cat plushie with the pads of his fingers. This was so soft and so special, and the fact that Jisung bought this for him makes it even more vital and unique. He swore that he wasn't going to lose this gift and keep it as neat as possible.

"Thank you, I love it, and since you gave me this, I am going to name him Jisung," Minho smiles. He was so affected by this cute little gift; he could tell Jisung was thoughtful about it.

"Ah, really?" Jisung says, his face daubed with pretty crimson. "I'm glad you like it."

"You're so cute," Minho grins. Something was drawing Minho towards the boy in front of him, and he couldn't constrain himself. He was getting closer to the face that was only growing redder. Jisung blinks at him; it seemed like he was anticipating what Minho was about to do.

When Minho gets too close, he pulls back and brushes his hand against Jisung's cheek, clearing away something that wasn't even there.

"Sorry, I thought there was something on your face."

"Oh...uh..." Jisung couldn't find his words and was utterly flustered. "Haha, I should've checked um... my face?" It was so adorable that he couldn't utter out a proper reply, and now Minho really wanted to press his lips against Jisung's, but that was going to be clearly inappropriate. He's with Daekhwa. Why must that be a fucking boundary between them?

"Don't feel shy, it's okay," Minho chuckles at Jisung's silliness. Jisung's orbs meet Minho's, and he smiles awkwardly before he averts his gaze.

"Did it rain crumbled papers here?" Jisung asks jokingly.

"Nah, I just was working on something."

"Ah, okay. I didn't distract you, right?"

"No, no. Not at all, I was actually taking a break when you knocked, so it's fine." Minho walked towards the living room, quickly picked up the papers on the ground, and threw them into the trash bin. Jisung walks over to Minho's couch and sits down on it, and Minho sits down next to him, but not too closely, he kept a few inches away from him.

"What should I do?" Jisung starts. Minho only blinks at him in confusion as a response, Jisung lets out a breath, and the oppression coming from it causes shivers to shoot down Minho's back. "Things between my friends and I are completely messed up, and I don't know if I should forgive them for what they did."

"Truthfully, I'm disappointed in them as well, especially Changbin. Most of all, I'm angry with Jeongin for manipulating them all. He used them for his own advantage. Forgiving them or not is your choice, they wronged you and Hyunjin, but understand how they feel to be lied to. Jeongin lied to them, and they believed his words."

"Okay..."

"Take your time," Minho smiles, "Just do what you feel is right for yourself."

✩

His mouth fell open a little, his body felt so warm, and there was a joyful tingling sensation everywhere in his body. It was all because he detected Minho standing with his friends in the line and attached to the zipper of his navy blue backpack was the cat plushie Jisung bought for him. He couldn't stop the smile that was beginning to creep up his lips. Minho must really love the gift.

"What are you looking at?" Daekhwa asks, and Jisung blinks into reality.

"Nothing," Jisung quietly answers and remains staring at Minho's backpack. How could such a little thing make him feel this way, make him feel so accomplished? The only thing Minho did was put it on his backpack, why should it be such a big deal? It didn't need to be such a big deal - well, at least that's what he is trying to tell his frantically pumping heart.

Why was it pumping like this? Why did Minho make him feel so warm?

"You're smiling," Daekhwa laughs, "Is there something funny?"

Jisung rips his gaze from Minho's backpack and looks at Daekhwa. "No, sorry, I was just thinking about my performance tomorrow," he lies.

"Ooh, good luck! I'll be there tomorrow," Daekhwa chuckles.

Jisung wanted to walk all the way to Minho and express all the cheerfulness that was pooling inside his body. But he couldn't just yet - maybe he could tell him in the literature class? They shared the same class anyway and sit next to each other as usual.

When Minho arrived in the literature class, Jisung instantly smiles once their eyes met each other. "I see you put Jisung on your backpack." Minho nods and sits down next to him.

"It's super cute, I just had to, I couldn't resist." Minho casts Jisung a smile. "It compliments my backpack well, don't you think so?"

"Yes, very well," Jisung agrees, "When I saw you during lunch with the keychain on your backpack, I was so happy." Minho ruffles Jisung's hair and chortles lightly.

"How are your practices with 3RACHA going? Especially with Changbin around?" Minho asks.

"It's going okay, we are working hard," Jisung responds. He wouldn't have been mad at Changbin because of that whole text fiasco. He would've forgiven him, but he couldn't brush away the cruel glances the older often gave him for several days. It still pricked him, and it was just too hard to let go. "I'm trying to act like everything is fine between him and me for the sake of the performance. I'll now just consider him as my acquaintance, nothing more." Jisung shrugs, "I hope it isn't too bad, I don't want to be too hurtful back."

"It's completely fine Jisung; I understand how you feel," Minho replies.

"I'm also nervous about tomorrow, I don't think I can handle performing in front of a large audience, what if I just go blank and stand there like an idiot?" He gazes at Minho with so much desperation for some assurance and comfort. He wanted the other to console him like last time; it helped him a lot. However, Minho's face doesn't show any of what Jisung hoped for, though. Instead, there was an understanding look to his eyes.

"I see. Honestly, I'm pretty nervous too. I'll be singing at the festival and regret signing up for it, but my heart pushed me to do so. I could've quit if I just wanted to, but my gut told me to suck it up and face the crowd and show the people my skill. Who knows, maybe it'll be a great experience," Minho responds, "How about we find each other tomorrow during rehearsals and make each other feel less nervous?"

Jisung liked that idea a lot.

"Yeah, let's find each other," Jisung replies.

✩

Minho regretted signing up for volunteering to set up for the festival. He was setting up a canopy all alone. Hyunjin dropped from volunteering and told Minho that it was because he wasn't feeling too good. Minho pitied him so much; the tall-boy looked so soulless and dead. He was no longer friends with Seungmin and Felix. He even avoided Felix in dance class and never danced next to him anymore and stuck in the back row.

He couldn't bring himself to dislike the three entirely - Jeongin was the one significantly in fault, and Minho just wanted to hit him mercilessly, or just ignore that bastard because he _also_ looked so drained and guilty.

Maybe he shouldn't lay a finger on him and let the brat figure things out for himself. Jeongin is a tornado, extremely hard to handle and destroys stuff as he moves along his path.

The canopy slid back down on one side, and Minho muttered out so many curses under his breath.

It was supposed to be easy - that's exactly what he thought when he first took it out of its bag, but now apparently, it wasn't so simple to do. It was too damn hard. Pulling up all four sides was so challenging for a person to do all alone, but he was trying his best to manage, and he brushes away the looks the other students who were also setting up canopies were giving him. Why were they staring at him like that? Why weren't they helping him out? Maybe they just had no heart and were so invested in seeing him suffer.

He thought about the pro of volunteering to help set up: He'd get recognization for helping out this school's events, and it'll make him much more appealing once he applies for whatever job he chooses to do soon, which Minho was still indecisive about (though he wanted it to be heavily related to dancing.)

"Are you fucking kidding me?!" Minho grumbles as the canopy collapsed on one side. "I worked hard to bring you up, but now you want to make things hard on me? Hmph." He clenched his fists at his side and felt his veins bulge. He was trying his best not to pounce on it and abolish it.

"Need help?" Someone says. Minho turns his head towards the direction of the voice and spots Seonghwa standing there looking amused with Minho's tantrum.

Numbers couldn't determine how much ease he felt to see someone willing to help him out instead of watching him suffer.

 _Such a kind and beautiful soul_ , Minho thinks. He didn't know Seonghwa that well, but he did know his name and a little about him. He's a nice person.

"Yes, please help me," Minho sighs and combs back his damp fringe with his fingers. Seonghwa immediately goes to the opposite side, helps Minho bring up the canopy, and locks the legs in place. "Thank you so much!"

"No problem," Seonghwa smiled and walked towards Minho. "By the way, I saw your name on the performance list, good luck in the evening."

"Thanks, are you performing?" Minho asks.

"No, but I'll be attending. I'm planning on watching Yunho, San and Mingi perform with the dance team, they really wanted me to watch, and since there isn't much on my plate, I decided that I should."

"Oh, are you their friend?!" Minho widens his eyes.

"Yeah," Seonghwa smiles, "I know that you are friends with them as well. They talk about you sometimes."

"I hope it's good things."

"They say you're quite an interesting and fun person to be around," Seonghwa shrugs, "Does that sound good?"

"I suppose so," Minho laughs. "Want to go eat something? I'm pretty hungry."

"We have a few more canopies to set up," Seonghwa pinpointed, and Minho groans. "Only a few, come on. The sooner we finish, the sooner we can eat." Minho pouts wistfully but gets to work nevertheless.

✩

As they both said, they found each other during rehearsals, and Jisung could see Minho was full-on panicking. The sight of him made Jisung's heart drop down to his stomach, and he was encountered with so much apprehension. Minho was pacing back and forth, his finger at his mouth, chewing on it nervously. Jisung didn't expect Minho to be this nervous. He thought that he was an entirely confident person, loving to shine on stage with a passionate, elegant smile. He did read his poem so perfectly in the literature class a while back. What is causing him to feel like this now?

"Minho Hyung..." Jisung mutters, causing Minho to pause in his steps and immediately swirl around to face Jisung. Jisung hurries over to the brunette and grasps onto both of his hands, they were trembling, and they were very sweaty. "You don't look too well."

"I'm okay, don't worry about me," Minho breathes out; his voice didn't come out like he was "okay" it was so breathy like he had run a marathon or something. Jisung's moves his thumb towards Minho's wrist, wanting to feel his pulse. His heart was beating rapidly. "Jisung, are _you_ okay?"

"I am! You're not!" Jisung shouts, Minho winces. "Don't wo-"

"Jisung, come on, our turn is next," Chan declares. Jisung gives Minho one last worried look before he follows after Changbin and Chan to the steps to get to the stage.

They finished rehearsing; it went well for Jisung mainly because there barely was any audience. They didn't put too much energy into the dancing as they wanted to have a lot of energy for the actual performance. They will be performing second, and he didn't feel like he was ready yet. He tried to convince himself that it would be okay and that there would be excellent outcomes after this. He will have an early experience at this stage. _I practiced, there is no need for me to worry_ , he tells himself in his mind and finally courage coursed through his veins.

It was going to be okay.

He had Chan, and he had Changbin (though he wasn't very fond of him.)

"We did amazing! Let's show how hard we worked!" Chan cheers and pulls the two into a tight warm hug.

Once they reached the resting area backstage, Jisung strolled towards Minho and looked him up and down to make sure he was okay. Minho sighs and leans back against the wall, and throws his head back seemingly in frustration. "Why did I fucking sign up if I am going to act like this?"

"Minho-"

"You signed up for it because you wanted to sign up for it. Remember why you signed up to perform." Chan comes by and studies Minho over. Minho let out another sigh, slid down the wall and landed on the ground with his legs sprawled out in front of him.

"You're right. I guess this is my chance to sing out my feelings instead of keeping it all inside me. I'll stop fussing and complaining and will just get it over with." Minho didn't look like he was sure with his words, and he was nibbling onto his bottom lip.

"That's right, Minho, you got this," Chan says.

"You mentioned feelings, is everything okay?" Jisung asks.

"Hah, no, not at all, but I'll manage, that's for sure. It's just _singing_. I'll be totally fine." Minho laughs and waves lightly, wiping the topic and worries away.

Minho's turn to rehearse came, and Jisung listened to his singing. His voice sounded so heavenly, and it was uplifting - Jisung felt so soothed, and he felt like he was floating. What is Minho not good at? He is like a prodigy, a talent, someone who had so many capabilities. Jisung even picked up the meaning of the song; it was all about loving someone, but the love was something he couldn't obtain despite wanting it back so eagerly.

Jisung wondered who was making Minho feel this way, and at that thought, he felt his heart explode into flames. Whoever that person was, they were so freaking lucky. Lucky enough to have an affectionate, understanding and a one of a kind person loving them with all his heart.

"Seriously...why am I thinking this way?" Jisung grits his teeth in exasperation. His heart was going through a change, a change he didn't want to take place. His heart was emptying out Daekhwa, and as much as Jisung felt guilty for it, he couldn't deny the fact that his eyes were set on Minho.

_Minho this. Minho that. Is Minho okay? Is Minho hear today?_

All he thinks about is either Minho or Hyunjin. The two people that he considered dear to himself.

After several minutes Jisung heard the crowd of people entering in, their upbeat tones filling up.

Jisung's nervousness that faded away made it's presence again, but he swallows it back, keeping it locked behind bars inside his mind. He didn't want to affect Minho much more. He wanted to be confident so that Minho could be confident too.

3RACHA's turn came up, it was their cue to climb the few steps and approach the smooth stage. When Jisung saw the immense audience, his body froze up, and his heart stopped. He didn't even blink as his eyes were trapped on the several heads present right before him, observing him.

Chan stepped up next to him and squeezed him on the shoulder. "It's okay Jisung, you can do it!" Jisung smiles at him, and then he turns his head back towards the crowd of people seated. He needed to be brave.

The light suddenly flashed onto them, making them glow within the beautiful orange and pink evening. The music started, something that Chan worked very hard on.

Once Jisung began his verse, it felt like the crowd blurred away, and he felt like he was the only one here at the moment. Jisung rapped out everything well with a huge smile to his face, and instinctively he licked his bottom lip once he finished his part. He felt so good on the inside.

The performance finally came to an end, the crowd erupted into loud cheers. Jisung felt so awake, so energetic, so happy, and he smiled widely at the people - tears at the outer corner of his eyes, just hanging there until he blinked.

Chan slings an arm around him and waves at the crowd before leading him back.

He landed on his knees once the approached the backstage resting area. Deep inside, Jisung felt like he was standing on top of a large cliff, he was proud of himself and his accomplishment. He just performed in front of everyone alongside Chan and Changbin. Amongst this thought, he lets out a breathy chuckle.

"Jisung, you okay?" Changbin asks him, eyeing him with solicitude.

The blue-haired boy stands up, smiles at him, and nods. "I'm perfectly fine, just super happy. I feel so free now, I don't know why, but I just do."

He then turns his body towards Minho, he was seated on the ground with his hands pressed against his thighs. Jisung was swift to saunter over the afraid looking male and sit down beside him. "Are you feeling any better?"

Minho squeezes his eyes shut and says nothing. "When it's your turn to perform, do you want me to be right next to you?" He still doesn't reply, and Jisung just wanted to cry. He understood how he felt and wanted to try his best to support him. "Hyung-"

"Look at my hand," Minho laughs nervously and shows his hand to Jisung, it was shaking so much. Jisung didn't laugh, nor did he say anything to show his remorse for him, all he did was reach out and squeeze the clammy hand that was blasting with warmth.

Minho leans his head onto Jisung's shoulder and lets out a sigh again. He was tense and wasn't at all soothed.

"My turn is next," Minho eventually says and then stands up. "I'll go now."

"Fighting," Jisung says. Minho gives him a small smile before he turns and heads towards the stage.

Jisung exits the resting area, and jogs alongside the fences until he reached the seating area, he looks around to find a spot to sit at. He wanted to sit in the front and be closer to the stage as possible. But much to his dismay, none of those seats were free, not even the places in the middle. This leaves him to head to the end because those spots weren't that occupied.

He walked towards there and spotted Hyunjin seated in one of the chairs.

Jisung sat down next to him. "Hi."

"Hello," Hyunjin replies, not looking at Jisung. He still didn't seem to be in a good mood. "You did so well with your performance, you're like a natural star."

"Not really," Jisung mutters.

"Oh, yes, you are."

Jisung was about to respond to that, but then his ears were consumed with that same rich and soothing voice, so he snapped his attention towards the front and spotted Minho on the stage. He was standing there, a mic in hand, and was smoothly singing out his heart. His face spoke so many emotions, his expressions were beautiful, blending in with the song so well. The pure sweetness in his voice made Jisung's heart blossom and swell up with glee.

Though he had already listened to him sing, it still moved Jisung and brought a smile to his face.

Minho stopped singing, the song ending made Jisung pout a little, he wanted to hear more, but he knew he couldn't because the performance is already over. The audience was cheering and clapping for the brunette as he bows, and frantically exits the stage. He was replaced by another performer, playing the cello.

"Wow..." Hyunjin says. "I don't have words to describe how good he was. I never heard him sing before until now, and dude, he is just excellent!"

"Right," Jisung replies.

"Jisung." Hyunjin turns to him, "Do you have any idea who this song was for?"

"No," Jisung frowns, "But whoever he is singing this to must be so lucky to have his love."

"Yeah," Hyunjin responds, and eyes Jisung with a certain glint that Jisung couldn't comprehend. Hyunjin was giving him a knowing look, and Jisung was puzzled. "That person...is very lucky."

✩

It was a Saturday, and since there was nothing much to do, Jisung was sprawled out on his bed listening to some music. Yesterday drained him out, and the only thing he even wanted to do was let the tunes lure him into relaxation.

He was alone, not that he minded; Hyunjin wasn't currently in the dorm since he went out to get his favorite drink from the café. Jisung knows that Hyunjin was stressed out and was completely empty on the inside, he has been feeling that way for a few days now. Getting his favorites was his way of coping.

A knock sounded on the door, so he took out his earphones and got out of bed to open it. It was Minho, who possessed a grin on his face, and he was holding onto a large bag. The blue-haired boy steps aside to let him inside.

"Hey, Jisung," he greeted.

"Hi, what's the bag for?"

"For you, actually," Minho responds, "I wanted to give you some of the clothes I've bought. A lot of it is pastel, which isn't my favorite despite wearing them. I'm not really comfortable with them, since I prefer my usual dark and casual style. I couldn't just throw out the clothes, so I decided to give you them. It's okay if you don't want them."

"No, it's fine." Jisung smiles. "I like pastels." Minho hands him the bag, and Jisung immediately placed it on his bed and took out a very light purple colored hoodie. He brings it to his nose and smells the fabric, taking in the sweet, fresh, flowery scent. It smelled so lovely.

"Don't worry," Minho laughs, "I made sure to wash them."

"I like the smell," Jisung responded and returned the hoodie to its bag. "Thank you for giving me the clothes, they all look so pretty."

"You're welcome," Minho responded and sits down on Jisung's bed. "They all will look so pretty on you. I definitely found the right person to give these to." He laughs and pats onto the spot next to him, gesturing for Jisung to sit down. "I need to tell you something important." Jisung nods at him to continue. "For a while...shit..." Flustered, Minho covered his face with his hands, then he collects himself and removes them. "Jisung, for a long time, I've liked you. Actually, no, I love you. A lot." Minho stood up from Jisung's bed and stands in front of Jisung, who was still seated. He wasn't sure if he should get up or not. "I know you're dating Daekhwa, but I just wanted to let this out."

Jisung didn't know what to say, but the realization all hit him. The way Minho had been acting so kind to him, smiling at him so widely.

The knowing look Hyunjin gave him yesterday must mean that he knows that Minho likes Jisung that way - does that mean that beautiful song he sang with such a beautiful voice was all for him?

"Minho I-" Once Jisung stood up, Minho cupped his face with his hands. His heart was feeling uncontrollable, his whole body was heating up for some reason, Jisung couldn't find his breath anymore. The brunette's face was getting closer and closer, and then his lips touched Jisung's. Minho's lips were so soft.

Jisung felt like he was wrong; this was wrong - Daekhwa...he was with Daekhwa...is this considered cheating? Despite those thoughts in his mind, why did this also feel right and so nice? The fact that it was Minho who was kissing him like this, it felt so good. He wanted more; he wanted this to last as long as possible.

Jisung presses his hands against Minho's chest, and before he could kiss him back, Minho immediately pulls away. "Minho Hyung..."

"I'm sorry! I'm so, so, so, sorry!" Minho widens his eyes. "What has gotten into me. I shouldn't have made you feel uncomfortable..." He combs back his hair in stress. "I'll get going now, I hope you enjoy the clothes." Before Jisung could utter a response to that, Minho rushed to the door, pulled it open, and left.

_What the...?_

Did Minho make him feel uncomfortable? Jisung, in no way, felt that way.

He felt content.

The door opened, and Hyunjin stepped inside. In his hands were two drinks, but he sets them aside on his desk. "Minho came here, didn't he?"

Jisung nods. "Why was he walking away looking so stressed out?"

"He kissed me."

"He what?!" Hyunjin walks over to Jisung and grips onto his shoulders. "Tell me _everything_."

Jisung ended up telling him everything that happened. Of course, he didn't see shock coming from his face; after all, it seemed like Hyunjin knew Minho's feelings already. Has Minho told him? Hyunjin must be a good secret keeper. He didn't even say a single thing about it to Jisung.

"He loves you a lot," Hyunjin sighs. "And to some degree, he even tried his best to be the best for you. And he'd sulk when he didn't feel like he wasn't good enough. Oh, how pitiful it was to see him like this, looking at you that way while you are with Daekhwa."

"The best for me? Goodness. He shouldn't have done that," Jisung frowns, and feels his blood drain from his face. Had Minho really been trying his best to be good enough? "He didn't need to be the best for me...when he already is. He has done a lot of uncountable things that just make me feel so happy. I don't get why he feels that way."

"Maybe because he wants you to love him back?" Hyunjin says and purses his lips. "You don't have to, but I'm just saying that he is trying to get your eyes on him. How do you feel about him, Jisung? Now that you know all of this and that he kissed you?"

Jisung didn't know how exactly to describe his feelings, but when he was around Daekhwa, he felt so neutral around him. But whenever he was around Minho, he gets so happy. Whenever Minho wasn't present, he would feel worried-sick for him and wonder where he is. He always wants to see him around. In Jisung's eyes, Minho was a large gem that shimmered right before his eyes.

Minho is,

Special.

Wonderous.

Lovely.

The neutral feeling Jisung was feeling around Daekhwa might mean that he wasn't in that much love with him compared to Minho, or it means that he was beginning to fall out of love with him. His feelings for him was disappearing.

"I don't feel the same with Daekhwa like how I feel with Minho."

"What do you mean?"

"When I'm around Minho, I feel cherished. I'm happy that he sang that song out of thoughts about me, and I'm happy that he kissed me." A smile tugged at the corner of Hyunjin's lips. He was trying his best not to smile, but obviously, it was failing.

"You," Hyunjin pokes Jisung on the chest, "Are falling in love with Minho. There is no other reason. I shouldn't say this, I have no knowledge about how you two are around each other, but I know how you and Minho are like individually, so I'll say it anyway. You two fit each other well. Give Minho a chance."

"I'll see," Jisung sighs, "When Minho left, was he crying? Did I hurt his feelings? I should've stopped him."

"No, Minho just looked stressed out, he wasn't crying, he looked regretful and guilty. Now fix that," Hyunjin smirks, "Tell him what you told me."

"I don't know..." Jisung whines and smacks his forehead in frustration, "I need to figure this all out."

"Take your time."

✩

Jisung and Daekhwa were hanging out in their usual spot during lunch break, talking happily, but Jisung just couldn't see him the same way anymore. He felt entirely bad for feeling that way, but could he even force change upon himself when his heart changed so naturally?

"Daekhwa, I need to tell you something." Jisung finally speaks out the truth while staring out in the window, seeing some students seated on the grass studying or talking to their friends. Daekhwa just hums as a reply, and the blue-haired boy takes that as a sign to continue talking. It was going to be hard to let it out. He couldn't force himself to love Daekhwa like how he did before. "I'm going to break up with you."

"W-what?" Daekhwa chokes out and turns his body towards Jisung. The younger did the same and barely managed to look up at him. The guilt and sorrow was massive inside of him.

"My feelings...they are so confusing..even though it shouldn't be," Jisung sighs and tears make their way into his eyes, the guilt was growing heavier by the minute, and his throat was tightening. "I think I am falling in love with someone else."

Daekhwa's mouth hung slightly open, but he didn't say anything.

"I'm sorry...I-"

"It's okay," Daekhwa chuckles, there was no hint of amusement within that laughter, he sounded so somber. "Who is this person that is catching your heart? They must be so lucky to have a person like you." Jisung didn't react to that compliment, he felt so much pity and guilt for him.

"The person I fell for is Minho," Jisung simply stated, "At first I liked him just as a friend, but recently my feelings for him grew, and now I like him more than just as a friend." There was a glint of darkness in Daekhwa's eyes, but it was quick to fade. Jisung knows how much Daekhwa resented Minho.

"Honestly, I can see that. Minho seems to like you a lot and dies over you. Plus, you look at him differently than you look at me. You are so fond of him and seem to like him a lot and enjoy being around him. Look, I can't do anything about your feelings, they are yours. It's all fine, really. I hope he treats you well if he doesn't, you know who to call," Daekhwa laughs. Jisung cracks a tiny smile, not really happy, but as a way to cover his pity.

✩

"Jisung! Jisung! Jisung!" Chan shouted at him once he entered the music production class. Chan ran up to him, "You can't believe what will happen to us!" Chan grabbed his wrist, dragged him towards their seat, and pushed him down onto the chair. "We've got scouted by one of the staff in JYP entertainment! He saw our performance on Twitter and asked if we wanted to audition. Changbin is okay with it, are you?"

"Yeah!" Jisung says, "I'm so happy, I don't know what to say."

"We need to celebrate this tonight," Changbin says, "We are growing!"

"I'd like that," Jisung smiles and then looks at Chan, who only nods as a reply.

✩

Right after classes, Jisung left with Changbin and Chan to celebrate their achievement. Hyunjin was alone in his dorm, doing nothing but lying down on his bed and thinking about things; he has been doing this for the past few days. He was stuck in his own little shell, and his heart was cleared out because of so many losses. The first rounds of thoughts were all about Seungmin and Felix, questioning if he should forgive them or not. They stabbed him in the back, kept somethings hidden from him, and that thing being Jeongin's text message that was all straight up lies he made.

 _Jeongin_. He definitely couldn't trust him anymore, his heart hurt upon that name. It hurt because he still loves him, even if he was a monster, smearing people's lives with his own hands and not caring about it. He only cared if Hyunjin was affected.

 _Stupid_ , Hyunjin thinks. _Why do you have to be so fucking stupid_?

He didn't want Jeongin treating him like a damned diamond. With so much care at his hands while he treated others like trash.

Hyunjin smacks his poor, innocent pillow - as if that's going to help him feel any better. "Why must I think about all this? Argh!" He stands up, stomps over to his closet, and pulled on his usual outing hoodie and exiting his dorm. He intended to go to the convenience store, buy some snacks, and devour those things while his mind is occupied with Kdramas. His days were too scarce to make it filled with dark thoughts.

The convenience store was conveniently close. Hyunjin roamed through the aisles, picking up snacks as he walked. Instead of only picking up a few snacks to eat, he chooses several. He'll give some to Jisung once he comes back from his celebration. Hyunjin was proud of his achievement.

He stepped into the aisle that contained sweets like candy, but what he spotted in that aisle was something not so sweet. Someone who made his heart painfully skipped a beat when he didn't want it to act foolishly. It would be wise to cut Jeongin from his heart, not let him hang in there with hope.

Hyunjin quickly grabs a chocolate bar, not paying attention if Jeongin saw him or not and speedily dashes to the checkout. Maybe he was too fast for Jeongin to see.

He exits the store, and for some reason, briskly walked through the sidewalk. He didn't need to walk too fast, did he? But he felt that he needed to, what if by chance Jeongin saw him?

He stops at the crosswalk, waiting for his turn to cross the street.

"Hyunjin."

_No, no, no, no!_

Why the fuck was he here? Why the fuck did he have to follow him?

Forget crossing the crosswalk, Hyunjin needed to get out of Jeongin's sight. He swiftly turns and rushes past people.

"Hyunjin, no! Wait! Please!" Jeongin calls out for him, but his words were all blurred. Hyunjin focused on getting away from him, not wanting to see him anymore for the rest of the day. As selfish as it sounded, he didn't want to give him a chance to speak. Didn't he tell him off last time? Did he not get the message? Hyunjin clearly told him that he wanted to have nothing to do with him anymore, were those words too confusing for Jeongin? It shouldn't be.

Hyunjin tugs on his hood and pulls himself into the crowd of people walking, keeping himself hidden amongst the several bodies. Sadly, the fact that he was taller than some didn't help him with his goal.

Stupidly, without looking back to see if Jeongin was still chasing after him, he rushed into the nearby alleyway and proclaimed his safety. He crawled beside a stinky dumpster, hiding from plain view.

Hopefully, Jeongin lost him and gave up his search.

Hyunjin pulls his bag of snacks close by him. He was going to stay here for the next couple of minutes, then he'd leave this place and finally manage to return to his dorm. All he wanted was to clear his mind that was filled with nothing else but negative things.

His only hope next, was that Jeongin wouldn't be waiting for him there right by his door. That was going to be hard to avoid.

"Hyunjin...? Are you here? I thought I saw you enter here?" _Fuck!_

He hears the shuffling of the younger's feet; the steps were getting dead close. Hyunjin shuts his eyes, praying that Jeongin-

"There you are," Jeongin sighs and looks down at Hyunjin with so much pain. "Please don't run away from me anymore. I need you to listen to me. I know-"

"We have nothing to do with each other anymore!" Hyunjin spat. "Won't you get lost?" He knew he was too mean, but he couldn't control his tongue.

"I want to apologize. I was wrong. I shouldn't have done any of those things to you. I shouldn't have manipulated you, hurt you, or even control you. I'm a horrible person. I know I did so many bad things. I misled your friends and caused them so much harm," Jeongin speaks out with tears filling his eyes, "I'm so sorry about those things Hyunjin. I can tell that you don't want to forgive me, you probably hate me with all your life at this point. But I want to let you know that I love you with all of my heart, and nothing will change that."

"Jeongin...why? Why can't you just let me go? You are making things hard on me! When you show up, you make me miss you so much, but I don't want to miss a piece of trash like you!" Jeongin winced at those words and wiped away his tears. "Maybe you should find someone else. Why do you have the urge to be with me? Why am I so special to you?"

"Hyunjin, you are you, you are nothing like the others. In my eyes, you'll never be like the others, because I only love you," Jeongin pitifully speaks, causing Hyunjin's bottom lip to wobble and tears fogged his eyes.

He blinks them away and wipes them with his cold fingertips. Jeongin sighs again and kneels in front of him. "I hope you can understand me. I can't let you go. No matter how hard I try."

"Well, you should!" Hyunjin cries. "I'm trying to let you go, no matter how hard it is. I'm trying to think of you as a bad person to achieve that! If I can't even forgive Seungmin and Felix yet, how am I supposed to forgive you?!"

"Don't be mad at them. It was my fault. With my own fingers and my phone, I texted them all of that. I wrote it that way so I could make them believe my words so that they could hate Jisung. That was my original intention. That was so stupid of me, and I hurt Jisung so much because of that. Don't give them the cold shoulder. The fault is all mine."

"Okay. I accept your fault. It's all your fucking fault, all because you can't control your god damn jealously! How does it feel to feel so guilty, you life ruiner!" Hyunjin was spitting out so many disturbing things that were most likely wounding the wretched boy in front of him. Funny enough, he couldn't stop himself and was venting uncontrollably. "Leave now! I'm not going to forgive you! Never expect me to forgive you!" Hyunjin stood up and clenched his fists.

Lies.

All of those spoken words were nothing but painful lies.

He wanted to forgive him. Jeongin is a cruel person, he did terrible things, but he also did good things. He made Hyunjin feel alive and loved even though it was too much, causing Jeongin to go out of control and contact so many insecurities.

"I know this is too much to ask for, but can you give me a chance?"

Hyunjin laughs sarcastically and puts down his shopping bag. His mind was plagued with bitter thoughts, overpowering his heart that was beating with so many sensations. The anger, love, and pain in his heart pushed him to grab Jeongin by his arms and pull him up so that he was standing.

He pushes him against the wall and crashes his lips onto Jeongin's with so much desire. He was growing out of control, that's what it was. His hands were clawing into the younger's hips, causing Jeongin to sob into Hyunijn's mouth.

Jeongin grips onto the back of Hyunjin's hoodie tightly, and bits onto his plump bottom lip. Hyunjin took that a sign to part away a little. "Hyunjin..." he breathes, trying to catch his breaths. "Your kiss is not what I need."

"Then what do you need?" Hyunjin asks, "My body? I can easily give you that if you want." Jeongin looks at him with hurt and disbelief.

Hyunjin grips onto the hem of his hoodie and begins to pull up the fabric. Jeongin gave him a panicked look, ripped his hands from the back of Hyunjin's hoodie, and presses them over Hyunjin's quivering ones.

"Your body is not what I need. You're not my toy," Jeongin replies and cups Hyunjin's face. "You're not an item. You were my boyfriend, and I didn't treat you like one. That's why I am willing to try my hardest to be better for you." Another single tear escaped from Hyunjin's eyes. "So please don't do this to yourself." He presses a quick kiss onto Hyunjin's lips.

Hyunjin only cries harder and presses his wet cheek onto Jeongin's pale skin. Jeongin makes him go insane; he was someone that he could never avoid, and if Hyunjin did, it would hurt his heart, and the wound would take long to heal.

Two things were tugging at his heart: One was telling Hyunjin to let Jeongin slip away from his grasp and fade into the air - let him suffer. The other was telling him to forgive Jeongin because he was sincere with his words; he admitted his faults and explained how much he loves Hyunjin. Could he give him another chance for that? He was scared that Jeongin was going to do the same thing again and hurt him all over again.

"I don't know what to do," Hyunjin mutters, speaking out his thoughts, "You make me want to forgive you, but at the same time, I feel like I shouldn't. What if you hurt me and the others again?"

"I swear I won't do that," Jeongin says. "I love you."

"I love you too, Jeongin." Hyunjin latches his lips onto the shorter boy's neck, and his hands reach underneath Jeongin's shirt. He touches around his stomach and chest, taking in the smooth, soft skin.

"Hyunjin..." The taller boy continues to attack Jeongin's neck, and his fingers brushed past Jeongin's sensitive bud, making him squirm and moan.

"I love you and missed how we were before," Hyunjin pulls away from Jeongin's neck and stares at the area for a few seconds hoping there wasn't any glowing red planted anywhere there. Jeongin wasn't his anymore, that was days ago.

Hyunjin pulled off his hoodie along with his shirt underneath, this time, Jeongin didn't budge, didn't grab onto his hand to stop him, and only stood there timidly awaiting Hyunijn's moves.

Hyunjin leans forward to capture Jeongin's lips and kissed him so harshly. It wasn't a kiss where he was showing his affection for him; it was a kiss of hunger and longing.

Jeongin's cold hands moved up to Hyunjin's shoulders, and he pried him away. "Are you sure about this?"

"Yes, I'm sure. I love you Jeongin, I really do, but why must I feel like getting away from you. What you did will forever remain in my mind," Hyunjin says and pushes Joengin down onto the ground. "As much as I want to cut you away, I can't. Why must you pitifully follow after me?"

"Hyunjin, it's all because I love you."

Hyunjin places himself onto Jeongin's lap and leans to kiss Jeongin once again. His hand trails down his chest and stops right above the hem of Jeongin's jeans. He pushes his hand inside and rubs his palm against Jeongin's erection, making it grow. Jeongin moans into his mouth and lays his hand onto Hyunjin's forearm.

Hyunjin didn't know why he was doing this, but he continues to do it anyways.

"Does it feel good?" Hyunjin asks once he pulled away from the sweet-tasting lips. Jeongin nods as a reply and presses his fingers into Hyunjin's arm as the taller boy stroked faster. When Hyunjin felt wetness at Jeongin's boxers, he pulled his hand away, pulled down the zip of Jeongin's pants, and took out his cock.

He scoots away from Jeongin's lap and leans down to capture the dick in his mouth, it was so warm, and the moan Jeongin was letting out was such a pleasant sound to hear.

Hyunjin swirls his tongue around, coating the cock with his saliva.

He pulls away and stares at Jeongin; both of their eyes were filled with lust. Jeongin was softly panting.

"You look so hot right now," Hyunjin whispers, but it was audible enough for Jeongin to hear.

Hyunjin then stands up, pulls down his pants and boxers, and sits on the younger's thighs again. Their lengths were touching each other, and this contact sent so much heat to Hyunjin's groin.

"Hyunjin, we shouldn't be doing this out here. Put your clothes back on."

"We're next to a dumpster, and it's slightly dark. No one will see, if that's what you're worried about," Hyunjin replies and lifts himself a little and positions himself above Jeongin's dick.

"Are-"

"Do you want to do this or not?" Hyunjin asks impatiently.

"Y-yes. But what about you?"

"I'm fine... _ngh_!" Hyunijn grits his teeth as he lowers himself. "I'll be okay, I want to feel you raw." He whimpers, and Jeongin places his hands onto Hyunjin's sides and rubs his thumb onto the pale skin to soothe him.

Hyunjin heart was acting wildly at this rate, why must Jeongin show this much concern for him?

"Stop when you need to, okay? I don't want you hurt." Hyunjin ignored him and pulled himself up and goes back down quickly, causing Jeongin to let out a soft groan and throw his head back against the wall.

"Innie, touch me," Hyunjin whines. Jeongin presses kisses onto his shoulders but then stops. Hyunjin frowns and watches how the younger patted around the ground and reaches for Hyunjin's shirt. He puts it on the taller boy.

"Why did you do that?' Hyunjin whimpers as he picks up his pace.

"I don't want you to feel cold." Jeongin groans and lays one hand onto Hyunjin's hip and the other on his back.

"But I feel so ho- _ahhhh._ "

Jeongin came and immediately wrapped his arms around Hyunjin, who came as well, all his seeds spurting onto Jeongin's shirt, dirtying it. "I'm sorry..." Hyunjin mutters, not moving from Jeongin's dick that was still up to his ass. Jeongin lets out a sigh, Hyunjin didn't know what that meant, but his curiosity was answered once he looked at Jeongin's sad longing eyes.

"Do you feel better now?" Jeongin asks. That made Hyunjin super sick to his stomach. Did he just... _use_ him? Did he let out his frustrations on him?

Even if Jeongin wronged, he deserved none of that.

"I'm sorry..." Hyunjin mumbles again. Jeongin places his hands onto Hyunijn's hips and lifts him from his length. Hyunjin felt the cum run down his thigh, and suddenly he felt so dirty.

"It's fine," Jeongin sighs and pulls up his zip. "It's fine..."

Hyunjin stands up, grabs his boxers and pants, and pulls them on quickly. He picked up his hoodie with one hand, and he outstretched his other hand for Jeongin to grab at and lifted him from the rough ground.

"Here, put this on. I messed up your shirt." He hands Jeongin his hoodie.

The younger pulled it on and stared at Hyunjin emptily. Hyunjin sighs and pulls him into a hug as an apology for lashing out on him and letting out his anger to someone who didn't deserve such extreme amounts of fury. Hyunjin was just miserable, and Jeongin was miserable enough to chase after him pointlessly.

"Hyunjin..." sobs emitted from Jeongin's mouth. Hyunjin pulls Jeongin tighter and tighter, even though that wasn't doing much to tone down the sniffles and sobs. "I miss you a lot."

"Let's eat something warm," Hyunjin murmurs ignoring his words, and they both pull away. He reaches down to pick up his bag and then leads the way with Jeongin quietly trailing behind him.

They ended up at a ramen bar, slurping the noodles away. Jeongin wasn't eating properly and looked like he was lost in thoughts. This was so fucking painful to watch.

"Eat well," Hyunjin speaks; Jeongin sniffs and complies with Hyunjin's strict orders.

Once they both finished, they exited the place and just stood aside from the building. "I guess I'll leave now." Before Hyunjin could turn away, Jeongin grasped onto his wrist, stopping him from moving.

"Give me another chance; I'll treat you better."

Hyunjin thinks about it, and seeing the tears run down the boy's cheeks makes him hurt.

He was just as damaged as Hyunjin was. Everything felt like a fog to him, and he was unsure about what to do. His heart ached and told him just to give poor Jeongin a chance.

"I'm sorry for using you like that earlier." Hyunjin frowns. "I promise this will never happen again." Jeongin's grip loosened, and he hangs his head.

"So what we did earlier...was a mistake?"

"Yes, and I'm sorry about that," Hyunjin apologizes again. Sniffles could be heard from Jeongin, yet Hyunjin tried to neglect those soft sounds and turned around. "Have a good day." A regretful sob choked out of Hyunjin, and he shuts his eyes and quickly walked away.

Maybe all Hyunjin needed was some time.

✩

Felix was seated against the wall in the dance club. He was sweaty and needed to catch his breath from dancing so intensely and energetically, showing off the choreo he had learned. Felix couldn't help himself; he just loved dancing. However, it didn't feel the same anymore because of how down-hearted and lost he felt. Dancing was so much better with Hyunjin. He missed dancing alongside him and fooling around, but that wasn't going to happen anytime soon. Hyunjin avoided him like the plague. Plus, Hyunjin wasn't okay at all, he grew worse day by day, yet, Felix couldn't do anything about it, since he was the cause of it.

A figure approached him, and Felix looked up to see who it was. It was Daekhwa, someone whom he didn't like that much because of his cockiness and arrogance. He always thinks he is the best. Nevertheless, Felix had to be nice as he could to the upperclassmen.

"Hello, Felix, how are you doing today?"

"Great. I'm having fun," Felix mutters. "Are you enjoying your time."

"Kind of," Daekhwa chuckles, "Well, not so much because of yesterday, but otherwise, I feel slightly okay." He sits down next to Felix and looks straight ahead. Felix felt too awkward.

"That's good to hear. Now that I've caught my breath, I'll head off now to dance some more." Felix stands up.

"Wait, since you've already stood up, can you get me my backpack," Daekhwa asks.

"Yeah, sure, which one is it?"

"It's the navy blue one with the cat hanging on the zipper." That backpack looked pretty familiar; he had seen it around frequently. Maybe it was Daekhwa's. He goes towards the other side of the room, grabs the backpack, walks back to where Daekhwa was seated and handed him the backpack.

"Thank you so much, Felix."

"Anytime." Felix glances off towards the students who were circled around a student freestyling. Amongst the bodies he spotted Hyunjin, he stared at him for a bit, and Hyunjin's eyes landed on his, and he looked at him with so much coldness and turned his body away so that his back was facing Felix. This cold treatment was hurting Felix a lot, but he felt that he earned it.

✩

Jisung was fiddling with his phone, wondering if he should text Minho or not. He wanted to let out his feelings too, but was scared to do so. What if Minho hated him now, or lost his feelings?

He texts him anyway, hoping that he'd text back. But for minutes, there was no reply, and he felt anxiety root inside of him. Why wasn't Minho replying? He didn't even show up to school today. What happened to him? Was he okay?

One of the biggest things he hoped for was for Minho to not be angry or upset with him. That thought alone made him feel so tense. He wished he had said something right after the kiss, then Minho wouldn't have left in such a rush.

"You've been staring at your phone for so long, is everything okay?" Hyunjin asks him, popping Jisung from the bubble of his distressing thoughts.

"No, not at all. I've texted Minho, but he hasn't responded yet. I'm so worried, what if he doesn't like me anymore after that day?"

"Stop thinking too ahead of yourself. Minho isn't going to lose feelings for you; he loves you like crazy. Take a break," Hyunjin yawns, "Let's go to sleep. Tomorrow we'll figure it out, okay? Don't stress yourself out and make your blue hair fall."

"Okay..."

The very next day, Jisung didn't see Minho at uni again, he looked around for him in some places but couldn't find him. He didn't even show up in his literature class, leaving the spot next to Jisung sadly empty.

Jisung was panicking way too much. He was convinced that he was the reason for Minho's absence. Minho literally stopped showing up after that incident. There wasn't even anything terrible about it.

He was sure Minho skipped classes because of him, there was no other reason. He probably didn't want to see his face anymore.

 _This is so stressful_ , Jisung thinks to himself and covers his face with his hands and rubs his face. He wished Minho would show up tomorrow.

The very next day, Minho didn't show up again. 


	19. Unwanted

_ [3 days ago...] _

He cried as he messed up his room, throwing things here and there. It's a desperate hunt, and he was doing whatever it took to complete his crucial search. He was hunting in his closet, throwing clothes out, despairingly searching for what he has lost. He searched under his bed, through his covers, his desk, but he couldn't find it anywhere. He even searched everywhere around his apartment, still, Nothing. 

He didn't know how he managed to lose two of his valuable items - he felt stupid for letting it actually happen. He lost his fucking notebook and his beautiful keychain. His notebook is severely private because it contained a lot of his personal thoughts. Literally, the only person who knows a little about his deep glooms is Chan - he knew some of his thoughts but not exactly all. 

The other item he has lost was the cat keychain Jisung gave to him - the cute blessing that he swore to protect with all his heart was now out of his hands - more like out of his backpack. Minho was much more hurt over that than his damned notebook, losing it was like bullets to his heart, and his chest was squeezing in so much pain. The plushie was so special to him that he cried out his heart the entire time he was searching around. His eyes stung from the excess crying. Maybe this is what he gets for skipping literature just because he wanted to avoid seeing Jisung. 

How could he have easily lost it, though? He regretted putting it on his backpack; instead, he wished he put it inside his bag. 

He walked out of his bedroom and entered his trashed living room. The environment around him looked terrible, and he had a lot of cleaning to do, but he wasn't going to do it tonight. Minho wanted to do it once he feels much better, but he thinks he wouldn't feel better anytime soon unless he finds the plushie. How is he going to explain to Jisung that it is missing? 

"Argh!" He screams and grips onto his brown hair tightly, his scalp tingling in pain. He's stupid. That's what he thought of himself. Stupid, foolish, and forgetful. He stopped crying once he felt something touch the side of his thigh, he sniffs in the water coming out of his nose and looks down to see Soonie head-butting him and purring. That made warmth reach under his icy-cold skin. He smiled a small smile and picked up the cat. He presses a gentle kiss at the crown of its head, and his cat responded to that kiss by licking the tip of Minho's nose softly, making him giggle and coo. 

"You make me feel so much better, I love you." It meowed as a response. 

He was distracted by a sound of pounding at his door. He placed his cat back down onto his couch and stared at his door. None of his friends knocked intensely like that. He already started to have a bad feeling run inside of him, sickening him in the stomach. It got worse as he neared the door and touched the cold knob. He wiped away the tears that were stuck in his lashes and opened the door. What he saw right before him made his heart freeze up, and made his limbs feel so numb. 

Two officers were waiting there looking over him with so much cautiousness in their eyes. One of the officers was holding onto a notebook -  _ his _ fucking notebook, and seeing that made his throat feel contracted and his body stiff. They must have read everything in there. Were they even fucking allowed to do that? 

"Hello, Lee Minho, right?" One asked while the other was looking right over Minho's shoulder, most likely observing the mess right in his living room. "How are you doing tonight?"

Minho's mouth only lay open, and water made their way to his eyes. He tried to hold them in, but with the overwhelming emotions running in him, they spilled out anyway. "I'm...doing good." His voice cracks. He felt like he was so defenseless and weak. 

"A person has reported you for being a threat to those around you. Evidence was provided," the other officer says and presents Minho his notebook. Minho tries reaching for it, but he hid the notebook behind his back. "Based on what we read, we are afraid that you might actually harm not only to the peers around you but also yourself." 

"I think you are misunderstanding..." Minho mutters out. "None of this is what you think." He recalls everything he had written in that notebook. Somethings were about his apprehensions. A lot was based on his obsessive behavior (mostly over Jisung and some people he hated.) He wasn't  _ actually  _ intending harm on others despite writing those things in his notebook. 

"There are no misunderstandings here, kid. Your notebook contains evidence of your behavior. The student who reported you expressed how uncomfortable they felt. All we want to do is make sure you are safe, so please come with us, we will get you some help." 

Minho had no other choice but to comply. One officer was in front of him while the other was following right behind him. They reached the police car, opened the back door, pushed Minho inside, and quickly shut the door. He wasn't even fucking on planning on escaping; he didn't want to bring in more trouble to himself. 

Once the car begins to move, Minho stares out the window, watching as buildings pass by. This couldn't be real...maybe this is a dream?

He looks down at his thighs as tears left his eyes. Was he going to prison? He didn't want to be put behind bars. Not only will he lose all his opportunities and have his future ruined, but he might also lose his friends over all the dark shit he has written in his notebook. His life was basically ruined right now. So many things blocked his path of dreams, and everything starting becoming pointless.

How long was he going to stick around in pri-

Much to his surprise, they didn't take him to the police station. They took him straight to the hospital. One officer accompanied him in the waiting room while the other was reporting his condition. He still couldn't stop crying, he was sobbing and hiccupping; the officer next to him didn't say anything to console him, nor did he ask him any questions. Minho was okay with that, he didn't want to speak, and he let himself cry until he is completely dry. 

They took him in and threw him several questions. He responded to them honestly, but they thought his responses were all just fake and that he was only making up lies to bypass this situation. No matter how much he attempted to persuade them that he wouldn't harm anyone, they didn't believe him at all and used his damned notebook as their proof. This was utterly unjust, especially the person who had the fucking nerves to report him. Whoever that dumb-ass is, they are fucking disgusting, and Minho will make their life strained, so fucking strained that they will regret whatever they did to him. They should be ashamed of themselves and experience his permanent wrath. This is unforgiving. 

Once the questioning was all done, he was told to take off his clothes and change into the loose patient scrubs. They checked around for any potentially harmful items before they led him to a specific floor and gestured for him to enter his room. The room's environment looked less than okay, it appeared so plain and empty like his mind, and immediately he felt like he didn't want to be here anymore. He just wanted to be back at his apartment with his cats. However, it is wise for him to follow their directions and make himself look like he is okay to be able to leave early. 

He sighs deeply, sits on the bed, wrapped himself with the blanket, and started crying again. How long was he going to be staying here? A few days? A week? A month? He needed to get back to uni, attend his classes, and maintain his grades; he couldn't let them slip. There were less than two months left until the end of the spring semester, and he wanted to finish off strong. Could he convince them now, and say that whatever he wrote in his notebook was just something random? 

Like they would discharge a patient who is deemed in severe condition and is unsafe. Did they see him as crazy? He isn't like this. 

\--------

_ [3 days later; present] _

"Jisung." 

"Hyunjin."

They called each other's names at the same time; Hyunjin sighs, Jisung frowns as he stares at the taller boy, he was still hanging by the door, looking back at Jisung with Nothing in his eyes. It was drained of emotions. Yet, Jisung could see the darkness inside him, and the emptiness alone was radiating off enough. He lowers his gaze and saw a bag at Hyunjin's hand, he didn't even need to guess what was in there as the smell was more than enough to tell Jisung that there was food there. It smelled so good, good enough to cause hunger to claw at his stomach. 

"You look like you need to say something, Hyung, you start first." Jisung breaks their short moment of silence and meets his eyes again. Hyunjin's shoulder drop and he places the bag onto his desk before he turns to Jisung. 

"I saw Jeongin with another guy." 

Jisung's breath caught in his throat, and he stands up. He felt so much anguish for the Hyunjin for experiencing what he didn't want to experience. Jisung felt like giving Jeongin a good punch for cheating; however, the feelings that were burning him soon died out once he realizes that the two broke up not too long ago. Hyunjin must be so unhappy to see Jeongin with someone else. He still loves him. 

_ Even though I broke up with him, my heart is still pulling me towards him. _

"Hyunjin..."

"It's okay, right? I shouldn't even feel bothered. We are no longer a thing anymore. That's long gone," Hyunjin laughs, his tone wholly filled with ice, leaking the warmth out of Jisung. The black-haired boy's mouth twisted into a frown, and Jisung has never seen Hyunjin in this much pain. "I just don't get it. What's fucking wrong with me? I broke up with him because of his behavior. I'm the one who was tired of his ways once I found out what he has done. I'm the one who wanted to forget about him, while he didn't want to forget about me. I wanted to end my associations with him, but somehow we end up finding each other. I don't think I can trust him, but why does seeing him with someone else make me feel so much damn pain?" 

"You seem to miss him a lot," Jisung replies, stating the obvious. 

"I don't want to miss him!" Hyunjin raises his voice slightly. "Why should I miss him? He did bad things to you...and to everyone else, not only me! I can't trust him, but I still feel like I should. He apologized to me; he said that he wouldn't hurt me or anyone else again. What should I do? I think I'm going crazy. Ugh!" 

"Hyung, that's something for you to decide, not me or anyone else. If you love him, then head to him, tell him that you forgive him, and give him a second chance. You seem indecisive about it, but do what you feel is right for you. I can give you my opinion on him, and how I feel about him, but I don't want to control how  _ you _ feel about him."

Hyunjin walks over to him. "How do you feel about him?" 

Jisung sighs, "I dislike him so much. To me, he is such a pain, but please don't let that get to you, okay? Just because I dislike him doesn't mean you should follow the same path. Hyunjin, you make your choice, you choose whether to trust him or not. You choose whether to love him or not." 

Hyunjin pout sadly and whines, "It's hard letting him go. I have this empty space in my heart, and when he is present, the space fills up whether I want it or not."

"You want him. Give yourself some time to reflect, you two broke up not too long ago. What if the guy he is with is just his friend. You shouldn't jump into conclusions." Jisung sees some relief wash over Hyunjin's face. 

"Right," Hyunjin inhales sharply and nods. "Um. I got us some food, let's eat before it gets cold. It probably got slightly cold at this point." 

"Yeah, let's eat. I'm so hungry." And the powerful growl sounding from Jisung's stomach made Hyunjin break into laughter. 

The food finally filled and nourished Jisung's once empty stomach. The food was so yummy, and not that cold, actually. Right after finishing up their meal, they cleaned up, and when they were done with that, they sat down next to each other. Hyunjin turned his head towards the blue-haired boy, making Jisung turn his head to him as well. 

"Earlier, did you also need to say something?" Hyunjin asks.

"It's Nothing really. I'm fine," Jisung replies. 

"Hm. You sure about that, Sungie? Or are you hiding something? That look on your face doesn't seem so fine. I told you what I needed to say, now it's your turn," Hyunjin pokes Jisung in the arm, "Leave it in and struggle by yourself, or let it out and get my help or opinions." 

"It's just Minho...he didn't show up to school for this entire week," Jisung answers. Minho still hasn't answered the text, nor did Jisung see his face. "I'm sure he isn't sick or injured. Otherwise, he  _ would've _ answered my text. Maybe he is sick of me." Jisung laughs. "I'm so anxious about this. He hates my soul."

"I'm nervous for him, and his grades, I hope he is okay." Hyunjin sighs. "Think about it. Why would Minho ditch school over you? He wouldn't do that to himself. He doesn't hate you. I'm sure you're not the reason he left all of a sudden, something important must have come up for him, keeping him busy."

"Busy enough to avoid class?" Jisung raises a brow. "If he doesn't show on Monday, it will be the death of me." 

"I pity you and him. Weird enough, the dance teacher didn't even ask anyone about his absence. Minho is important in our class, as he helps around a lot. He has to be sick or something, and the professors might know about it. See? I'm sure it isn't because of you. He wouldn't leave school over whatever happened between you and him. So stop throwing yourself around like that." 

"Let's just hope he is alright, I guess."

"Mhm."

\--------

Right after classes, Hyunjin walked towards the library to find any interesting-looking books to occupy himself with. He headed into the enormous tranquil place filled with students studying or reading books. He dragged himself towards the fiction area and started searching for books, trying to spot something intriguing. 

Eventually, a book caught his eyes, and he pulls it out and reads the description before deciding to take it. He loves it already. He starts walking through the aisle, wanting to check it out.

"You're so silly," he hears someone say in such an upbeat, optimistic tone. He was going to shrug it off as someone talking to their friend, but the next voice stopped him dead in his tracks and made him tense up. 

"Not really, I guess it's all-natural."  _ Jeongin _ . Why the fuck is he giggling like that to that person who was obviously flirting with him? And what the hell was he doing inside a library? Hyunjin was sure Jeongin wasn't the type to read books. 

Out of all places, why here? They really do collide eventually, like they are expected to be around each other, whether or not Hyunjin desires it. But in this current circumstance, he doesn't desire it much at all. He was doing so well today, but now that he sees Jeongin, his heart flipped again. 

He still remembers that other day really well, the day when they both spoke their minds - Jeongin crying and apologizing for his mistakes, but Hyunjin disregarding them all, angry that he was still in love with him despite his wrong-doings. The same day he was out of his mind and fucked Jeongin in the fucking alleyway, low key giving him false hope (which may not exactly be false.) That thought made his cheeks burn, and he just wanted to slap himself for being so reckless and foolish. 

The aftermath of all of that? Jeongin was hurt because it was a "mistake." Words couldn't describe how embarrassed Hyunijn felt in himself. 

"Do you like reading books?" The person with Jeongin asks. Hyunjin reached the shelf that was before the one Jeongin was supposedly in and peeked into the opening above the books. It was that same fucking boy Hyunjin had seen around Jeongin. The boy was so attractive, his hair is a light brown, and that smile of his is pretty. 

"Sometimes. It depends," Jeongin laughs. "I don't often read books, but if I do feel like reading them, I usually choose action or fantasy. You seem to love reading, is that why you dragged me here?"

"Yes!" The boy replies, "I really do enjoy reading whenever I find the time." Hyunjin grits his teeth at how they looked at each other with so much attachment towards each other. His chest erupts into flames, and he clenches his fists at his sides. Why should he care? They were over. Jeongin is a traitor. Ruthless. Ill-willed. Hyunjin tried to list every reason not to like him, but those words bounced away quickly because he remembers the times Jeongin wasn't those things, and treated Hyunjin with so much love; gave him so much attention and kisses. 

What if Jeongin decided to move on? If he did, then he is so much stronger than Hyunjin. How did he manage to do that without feeling any hurt or pain? 

"You know, I really like you," the boy's hand reached Jeongin's waist, and he pulled him closer to his body. 

"I like you too, Sunwoo," Jeongin murmurs, and presses a kiss onto Sunwoo's lips. This shattered Hyunjin's heart right away. And when they kissed each other harder, Hyunjin's eyes filled with tears, and he covered his hand with his mouth to prevent himself from letting out his sobs. He hated this sight. 

Jeongin pulls away and brushes his thumb onto Sunwoo's bottom lip. "You're so lovely." Something that Jeongin once told Hyunjin with a big smile on his lips and with twinkling passionate eyes. "Since you love reading books, can you recommend me some books to read?" 

"Of course!" 

Jeongin's eyes suddenly shifted and met with Hyunjin's eyes. Hyunjin widens his tear-filled eyes. "Wait a minute, I need to check something out real quick." Hyunjin felt glued to his spot, but once he sees Jeongin heading out of that aisle, Hyunjin rips from his place, dashes out, and runs to the back. Maybe he was being a little too obvious because Jeongin followed him the same way. Hyunjin steps back as Jeongin steps closer. They stare at each other - Jeongin stares at him intensely, but Hyunjin stares back coldly. 

"Hyunjin, what are you doing here?" 

"Is that what you are going to ask?" Hyunjin scoffs, "I'm just finding some books, see," he shows him the book he picked out. "Nothing else. Now go back to your new pretty boyfriend and kiss him more." Jeongin's face paled. 

"Hyunjin..."

He turns and storms away, only turning his head one last time to check to see if Jeongin was miserably rushing right after him. However, he wasn't. He was still glued to his same spot, staring at Hyunjin with melancholy.

_ Maybe you should find someone else. Why do you have the urge to be with me? Why am I so special to you? _

Whatever. It's okay now. Hyunjin felt that he should be happy that Jeongin found someone to be with, isn't that what he wanted for him? 

He checked out his book and exited the library. He continued walking until he found a spot to sit at. He took out his phone and blocked Jeongin's number and cried. 

It's difficult. 

\--------

3RACHA's audition was successful. Before entering this glorious place, Jisung was over-filled with nervousness. Chan being the good friend and teammate he usually is helped cheer him up and said so many encouraging things. Changbin just patted Jisung on the shoulder as they both were a little awkward with each other. 

The outcomes were excellent, though. The staff who judged their performance were so impressed and were even more impressed to hear that 3RACHA composed the songs themselves. Much to their happiness, they were accepted to be trainees, and they were promised a debut within two or three months. It depended on how much they improve. 

Now they were blissfully hanging out in a cafe, sipping their drinks, and eating their desert as a celebration. Jisung, of course, was eating his favorite: Cheesecake, and it was  _ so _ enjoyable as he was entirely happy. 

Changbin, all of a sudden, clears his throat; both Jisung and Chan turned their gaze at him in a confused way. "Um," he looks at Jisung. "I'm sorry for hurting you a lot for the past days." He pauses, Jisung just stares at him, waiting for him to resume speaking. 

"I know what I did is unforgivable. You probably don't even want to forgive a fucked up person like me who only gave you worthless cruel glares whenever I had the chance. I'm sorry if I doubted you in any way, it was so horrible of me to jump into conclusions, which was such a stupid mistake, and I am wrong for all of it. Sorry for being silent about it towards you, and sorry that I spoke up to you until now. I want us to start fresh again, and I want to be a better friend towards a kind-hearted person like you, Jisung. Only if that's okay with you. I don't want to-"

"Okay," Jisung replies. 

"H-huh? Really?" Changbin widens his eyes, and his mouth was almost forming a smile.  _ Almost _ . 

"Yeah, let's begin again." 

"Yes! The moment I have been waiting for!" Chan gleefully says and pulls Changbin into a side hug. "I don't know why I feel this proud, but I do!" 

"A new and improved Changbinnie coming right at ya," Changbin does finger guns at Jisung and winks. It felt so good to forgive, even though he couldn't forget. Indeed Changbin hurt him a little; however, Jisung was more than happy to let it go and forgive him. Changbin was being genuine with his words and apologized for what he did. Giving him another chance was something Jisung was okay with doing. 

\--------

Minho was staring out the window, soaking in some warmth from the beaming sun in the mid-afternoon. He felt like nothing. He just wanted to go home, that's it. His mom came the same night he was forced into this place, and she ran over to him, feeling so worried and was crying. He assured her that everything was okay and that he was here because he was exposed to the authorities for his worrying actions. 

She's a lawyer. A top-notch lawyer, one of the best in this country and has a high win rate. If the staff in this hospital disagree with letting him out of here, his mom could be a big helping hand. Or at least that's what he had hoped. He wouldn't have been stuck here any longer if only his mom were convinced by his words, which she wasn't, just like the staff in this place. She was sure that Minho wasn't okay, and thought that it would be best for him to remain here till he gets better. Bad idea. Minho can't last here any longer. He wanted to see his cats, he missed them, and they  _ probably _ missed him. At least his mom will be taking care of them. 

It felt like he was stuck here for so long. Today is a Tuesday; he has been here since that Tuesday night, which means that he has officially been here for a fucking  _ week _ and man how much he is stressed out over his assignments. He brought that up in a group-session, expressing his frustrations and worries. 

He is diagnosed with severe anxiety - thinking about it, Minho believed that it was true; he always felt anxious and out of breath frequently. He is continually bombarded with so many stressing thoughts. He worries so often. He is also diagnosed with Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) because of those reoccurring thoughts listed in his notebook. 

The nurse enters his room to check up on him, and he swiftly turns to her. "Hey, can I make a phone call? I would like to call a friend." She smiles and nods as a reply and took him to an area to make a phone call. He only had a few minutes to make his call, and he thought it would be wise to call Chan. So he dials his number, one of the numbers he knew by heart. 

"Hello, Chan Hyung, it's me Min-"

"Oh, my goodness! Minho! Are you okay?! You've been gone for long. I missed you! You haven't answered my calls, nor have you texted me or read my texts, but forget that. How are you doing right now? Did you injure yourself? Are you sick? I think I'm going to cry." 

"No, I'm okay. Thanks for worrying about me," Minho lightly laughs, "Sorry for not replying to you or answering any of your calls. I have been away from my phone because I've been in the hospital for a week." 

"Hospital?! For a week?! Did you injure yourself again? How are you feeling now? Nothing hurts, does it? Tell me which hospital you are at, I'll come for you. I want to see you." 

"I'm in the mental hospital," Minho sighs.

"You decided to get help? I'm glad you did, I'm so proud of you Minho-"

"Against my will, Hyung, against my will. Now please come by I have a lot to tell you and I miss you so much too." 

"Um, tell me the location? I'll be there very quickly."

Minho turns to the nurse attending him, "Can you please give my friend the address to this place." She nods as a response, and Minho handed her the phone. She tells Chan the address and then returns the phone to Minho to continue his call.

"Okay, Minho, I'll be there in a couple of minutes, stay put."

"I can't wait to see you. Bye ~." He ended the call, headed back into his room, and sat down at the same spot near the window, staring out into the beautiful sky, thinking deeply - again, about his assignments that were waiting to be completed. He had no way to get in touch with the work as his phone and laptop were sitting at his apartment. He hopes that he will be able to get extensions. 

"Minho?" He turns around and see's Chan peeking in. The older boy steps inside and walks over to Minho with a warm smile on his face. "You okay?"

"Mhm," Minho hums, "Just a little irritated that I was forced to be here."

"Can you tell me exactly why?" 

Minho explains everything - from coming home from the dance club, seeing that his notebook and plush were missing, up until what is happening now, not missing any details. Chan takes in everything and gives him such a pitiful look. 

"Dude, what the hell? That is so fucked up. That person who took your notebook is so fucking horrible. And the police, and everyone else looking into your diary, this is all so fucked up. You have your rights of privacy, Minho. Isn't your mom a lawyer? She can look into it and-"

"She thinks I need help," Minho sighs.

"She isn't wrong," Chan shrugs, "You haven't been doing well for several days, you are obsessing over things, and it's affecting you a lot, maybe you do need a little break and relax your mind. You should recover." Minho didn't like what he was saying; he didn't want Chan to say those things. Minho hoped that Chan would understand how violated he felt, now that some people know his personal thoughts. He feels so naked and vulnerable. 

"Chan, I'm okay! I'm not in a critical condition; they just think that! Please, you need to help me get out of here," Minho cries, " _ Please _ . That's all I want! To be free, return to my apartment, talk to my cats, and catch up on my assignments! I have a life, you know."

"Yes, Minho, you have a life. You deserve to feel happy, you deserve to feel free, so please, I think you should spend some time taking care of yourself, and once you can leave this place, you can talk to your professors. They will most likely modify everything for you and give you time to catch up." 

"Chan Hyung. I feel so horrible, my diary...I just..."

"They claimed you were harm to others, right? If you're this desperate to leave, then tell me who you wrote about the most." 

"Myself, Jisung and Daekhwa." 

"Aha! I think I can help...a little," Chan smiles, "Do you feel like you are a harm to yourself?" 

Minho shakes his head. Of course, he isn't.

"Jisung?" 

Minho shakes his head again. 

"Daekhwa." 

"Well, about him...haha...I hate that bastard!" 

"Hm. As much as I don't support you leaving this place, I will try to figure some things out for you and get you out of here since you want to leave so badly, and I feel bad for you. I just have one idea in mind. Jisung. If he doesn't feel uncomfortable with you, maybe he can assure the staff about that? Perhaps then they will discharge you?" 

"Not bad...not bad..." Minho smiles. "You are so smart."

"Alright, I'll see what I can do, let me figure some more things out." 

"You're the best!" He pulls him into a hug, and Chan chuckles. 


	20. Missing You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for another late update :(( Classes started for me, and I didn't think I was going to have too many assignments but I did and had to work on those. I barely had the time to edit this chapter, but here it is - another long chapter! ^^ I loved writing this chapter a lot, and I hope you enjoy reading! :D
> 
> (sorry for any grammar errors, I rushed through the editing)
> 
> I also changed the name of Jeongin's new boyfriend from Daehwi to Sunwoo because I noticed the name Daehwi was similar to Daekhwa's name, so I decided to change it. 
> 
> Once again, sorry for the long wait, and I will try to figure out a way to manage my time.

"Where are you going?" Hyunjin asks, perking up from his spot. 

"I want to see if Minho is at his apartment," Jisung responds, running his eyes through Hyunjin's face, "Do you want to come along?" He hoped that Hyunjin would say yes because he didn't want to go there alone.

"Oh, okay, can I come with you?" Jisung beams at the answer and nods. Optimistically, Hyunjin lifted himself from his bed. 

They both leave the dorm, and they had to use the bus to get to where Minho lives, a relatively expensive area that he could somehow afford. Or maybe he  _ could _ afford - Jisung has seen his car a couple of times, though he ignored the model, he knows it's considerably expensive because of the interior and exterior, the design was high tech. 

"Let's hope he is here in tip-top condition," Hyunjin sighs and knocked on the door. A few seconds later, the door opened, revealing a middle-aged looking pretty lady dressed in a white button-up, with a beige colored, loose-fitting cardigan and a dark brown colored knee-length skirt. She looks so sophisticated and somewhat stern. Hyunjin had already introduced himself and bowed, while Jisung stood there dumbfoundedly, questioning who that woman was.

"How may I help you?" She asks, disgruntled with their presence. By any chance did Minho move out of this place? Was it because of Jisung? Jisung became sad upon that thought. 

_ Meow _ . 

The light meow sounded nearby, and he peers down and notices one of Minho's orange furred cat -Soonie, standing near the woman's feet, rubbing its head against her ankle. Jisung drags his gaze back at the woman's face - thinking about it now, she must be his mom, they kind of look alike. So, Minho still lives here; he wouldn't move away without his cats; he treasures them with all his heart. Is his mom here because she is taking care of him? Or are they wanting to spend more time with each other?

Hyunjin's leans towards Jisung and whispers, "Ahem. Introduce yourself." Jisung's face burns with shame, and he gives the mom an apologetic smile.

"Sorry about that, I was lost in thoughts," Jisung bows, "I'm Han Jisung, it's nice to meet you. Hyunjin and I are Minho's friends, and we haven't seen him at school for the past few days. That's why we decided to stop by to check on him. Is he okay? " 

" _ Oh _ ." The tired look on her face leaves, and she smiled in interest. "Come inside."

They both stepped inside, and she gestures for them to sit down at the couch. Jisung noticed how papers were scattered around on the coffee table. Near the papers was a laptop, with a mug placed next to it. All of that showed how busy Minho's mom was; she must have a lot of work to finish. "Sorry about this mess," she laughs and gathers the papers, stacks them neatly beside her laptop, and picked up her mug. "I'm pretty busy. I was researching my new case." She walks into Minho's kitchen, places the cup into the sink, walks back into the living room, and sits down on the couch. 

"We aren't bothering you, are we?" Hyunjin asks. 

"No, not at all. I do have a lot of work to complete, but that's okay, I'm happy that you two are here."

"May I ask what job you are working as?" Hyunjin delivers another question, and Jisung gazes at Minho's mom curiously, waiting for her response. 

"I'm a lawyer." Hyunjin gapes at that response, Jisung widens his eyes. "Are you two interested in studying law or want to be a lawyer? I can give you so many tips that can help you along your path."

Jisung shakes his head. 

"No, I'm not that interested in law, but I am pretty interested in dance and marketing," Hyunjin replies.

"Ahh, that's so cool! Minho loves dancing as well. I'm sure you two know that already," she laughs, "In Highschool, he often danced. He was interested in dancing more than he was in learning and didn't graduate with good grades, but I'm proud of him. He seemed to have found his true passion and is happy with it. He competed in so many dance competitions and won awards. Because of his skills, participation, and recognition in dance, he got accepted into a good university." Even though she was bragging a lot about Minho, Hyunjin and Jisung were so invested in it. Jisung got to know a lot more about Minho's past, especially with dance. It's so interesting to learn more about him. Minho is one of a kind. 

"He is pretty skillful, no actually the best in our school, so many opportunities reach him. He is like my role model. I aspire to be like him. He is so hardworking and passionate about what he does. Sadly, he hasn't been occupied with dancing for several days now, so much comes up for him, and I feel so bad," Hyunjin frowns. Jisung purses his lips, the pity reaching deep into his bones. Minho is having a difficult time so frequently; it's like bad luck loves hitting him often, causing him to roll away from what he loves doing. 

"Your question earlier," she looks at Jisung, "Don't worry about Minho. He is going to be away for a bit until he gets better. He is getting treatment, and it's crucial for him."  _ Crucial? _ Jisung furrows his eyebrows, thinking deeply about it. 

"He didn't injure himself again, did he?" Jisung asks, although the answer may be evident. Why else is Minho seeking treatment? 

Minho's mom gives Jisung a panicked look; it appeared like she doesn't know about Minho's past two injuries. He must have kept quiet about it from his mom. 

"Again? What do you mean again?" She leans forward, gazing at Jisung attentively. 

"First he slipped and got a concussion during dance class, he wasn't careful and overworked himself he always does that. But his hard work is pretty inspiring. Second, he ran down the stairs and fell, and passed out, no injuries to his head," Hyunjin nonchalantly states, and Minho's mom looked even more concerned and panicky. "Since you said he is getting treatment, can you tell us what happened to him now? We are worried-sick." 

"Goodness," she presses her hand against her forehead and drags her hand down until it covers her mouth. "I can't believe he has been keeping these things to himself. I know he doesn't want to worry me, but he should be more careful, his carelessness is so worrying." Then she pulls a very tiny smile, "You two seem to care a lot about him. Don't worry too much. He didn't injure himself again."

Hearing that Minho isn't injured is such an enormous relief to his worry-filled mind. However, what Jisung wanted to know was why Minho was receiving crucial treatment? Is he really okay? He misses him so much; dealing with his absence is so hard. Once he sees him, he wants to run to him, pull him into an embrace, and ramble about how much he missed him.

"Do you know what treatment he is getting? Is it an injury?" Hyunjin asks, Jisung appreciated Hyunjin for asking that question. 

"It's something private," she responds, "You can ask Minho once he is back." 

"Alright, thanks for telling us." Jisung forces a smile, a teensy bit skeptical - why didn't she want Hyunjin and him to know what is going on? Maybe it was upon Minho's request. He regularly keeps everything to himself, suffering by himself, not wanting others to be aware of his whereabouts, and only shows his face once he is okay. 

"Don't worry," she says as if she senses Jisung's inner worries; his expressions must have revealed how he felt. 

After their farewells, they walked side by side, back to the bus stop. They stood there waiting for the bus to arrive; it would take a few more minutes - they didn't mind the wait, though; neither of them would be bored by standing because they could talk to each other. 

"I worry about Minho too much, don't I?" Jisung sighs and looks at the building that was straight ahead. The sickening feeling still sticking within him, knotting in his stomach. 

"Love is so pretty, like flowers," Hyunjin chants randomly. Jisung ripped his gaze from the building to look at Hyunjin in a questioning way. Hyunjin grins at him in a silly way. "Jisung, is your heart made of flowers?"

"What are you even trying to say?"

"I see flowers. You have so many in there." Hyunjin points at Jisung's chest. The bus finally arrives, and people make their way inside. Jisung and Hyunjin entered right after them, scanned their passes, and settled down at the middle seats. Jisung stares at Hyunjin, wanting him to finish his words. "The flowers you have are so pretty, and they smell so sweet. Those traits are what makes you up, Jisung. It's okay to worry about Minho; you love him."

"A lot," Jisung concludes and rests his head onto Hyunjin's shoulder and shuts his eyes, not falling asleep but thinking to himself. If Minho is receiving treatment, there is no other place for him beside the hospital. He wished he asked his mom about where he was, but then she was precise with her words, it was something private, and Minho probably wanted no one to know. 

"I hope whatever he is dealing with right now is going okay," Jisung mutters.

"Yeah. I'm sure Minho is fine. He can handle anything." 

Jisung lifts his head and looks up at Hyunjin. "Hasn't he been dealing with so many things for days? I'm worried that he will break. What if he is struggling right now or crying...? It's been days, and there are no words from him." 

"Jisung," Hyunjin combs his fingers through Jisung's hair. "Relax, you're so tense right now. If he doesn't show up, we can hunt him down ourselves, and eventually, you'll finally be able to see him." 

Jisung lets out a laugh that's filled with sadness. "I think it's all my fault. He disappeared after our awkward situation. Even if I want to see him, he probably doesn't want to-" 

"Stop with that!" Hyunjin says in a slightly stern way and stops stroking Jisung's hair - his fingers not yet leaving from the blue strands, thankfully. "Minho cares about you a lot, and that thing that happened that day shouldn't make you feel this way. Minho doesn't hate you. He wouldn't. Why would he hate someone like you? He looks at you differently than he looks at anyone else. He changes when he is around you. For days he was protective over you, questioning me and the others about why we were bad friends. He had a sense of what was going on; he wanted to make you happy, while we treated you like trash. Minho looked at us like he wanted to tear our bodies apart. I'm so jealous of that - Minho would do anything for you, go through so much for you, and you think he hates you after that kiss? That is the funniest thing I've heard, and Minho probably feels the same way as you. I saw how stressed he looked once he left our dorm. So stop being such a worried mess. You're wasting your time  _ imagining _ negative things. Think about how happy he'd be to see you, and how happy you would be to see him." 

"You're right. I really should stop assuming the worse." 

"Yes, now let yourself breathe," Hyunjin removes his fingers from Jisung's hair.

\--------

"Minho, Minho, Minho!" Chan bursts inside Minho's hospital room, surprising him. Minho was seated on his bed, with his legs sprawled out in front of him, the book he was reading seconds ago was now resting on his thigh. Reading was the only amusing thing he could find himself doing, and dancing to nothing - unless he sings the lyrics of the song on his own or hums the beats. "I figured out how to get you out of here!" 

"Shh," Minho hushes him, "Don't speak that loud, they'll figure out."

"Right, sorry," Chan rubs the back of his neck in embarrassment. He reaches into his pocket, takes out a folded piece of paper, and unfolded it with a proud smile. Minho looked up at him in anticipation, having high hopes that the plan would be good enough, good enough to get him out of here fast. Can he last another day? Well, he stayed here for many days, but the dread of sticking here longer is so intense, and Minho was growing desperate. 

"So, basically, I'll tell Jisung you are here. You spill the main things you've written about him in the notebook that labeled you as a threat by the authorities. If Jisung understands, which of course he will, then good for you! Ask him if he is uncomfortable with you or not, and if he isn't, then the next step is to tell the staff and bring him along with you. Ensure that things are okay. The major reason you are here is that the things you've written caused concern, and since Jisung is whom you've written about a lot, he can tell them that he is okay, and hopefully, they let you out." Minho smiles at Chan's words, quite happy with it. 

"In case that doesn't work, then your genius Bang Chan has another plan." Chan cackles and puts on a sly smile. "I did so much research for this because I don't know a lot about the law. Here it goes. I know your mom wants you to get treatment, and she's a lawyer. And since she doesn't want you out of here, maybe you can try convincing her a little better by telling her that your notebook that contained private thoughts was taken without your permission. That's straight-up theft, and that person violated your privacy without your consent and disclosed the information to the authorities. As one of the best lawyers in this country, your mom holds great power, no one can refuse her words." 

"What if they don't care and say that I'm a threat?"

"Just because you obsessively wrote in the diary about how you felt about people doesn't mean you are considered a threat. People write to cope with their feelings. You didn't directly claim anything about killing people in that notebook of yours, right?" Minho thinks about it for a few seconds. He has a feeling that he did - probably about killing Daekhwa? But that didn't mean he wanted to kill him; it was his way of expressing his anger. 

Minho ends up nodding, and Chan widens his eyes. 

"Who?"

"Daekhwa, he is horrible," Minho explains. "I don't want to kill him. I don't even have the heart to kill...I think."

"You think?" Chan raises a brow.

"Look," Minho pats his chest, "Right here is nothing but a deep, dark space with nothing. I have no heart. But what I do have is laziness, I'm too lazy to kill, and clean up the mess and discard any evidence."

"Fucking hell..." Chan sighs. 

"But nothing else in there is worrying at all, at least to me. A lot of the things I've written about were just my stupid obsessions," Minho claims.  _ And _ some other things he wrote were mainly about himself and how he felt like he wasn't good enough - he wanted to be like Daekhwa - mostly because Jisung described that coin-head nicely. Now Minho doesn't even want to bother being like that rat. Daekhwa belongs in his pretty little world, located in the dark sewers. 

"Still, they have no right to force you here, if you continuously claim you are fine and show that you are fine," Chan says.

" _ Am I? _

"Are you?" 

"Hmm...nope." 

"Why, what's wrong?"

"Everything," Minho lets out a frustrated breath, "Being here, no school for how long? Missed-"

"It will be  _ fine,  _ don't get too ahead of yourself."

"I like your plans, by the way. You seemed to have thought a lot about it. What do you do to be this smart?" 

"Research and common sense," Chan laughs, "And motivation because you are my friend, and I love you so much that I'd do anything for you." 

"I love you too, Hyung." Minho feels himself turn cherry-red, and his smile turned into a smirk. "You'll do anything for me?" Chan smiles so cutely, looking like a happy puppy, and nods. " _ Anything? _ " 

"What are you thinking?" Chan scoffs, "I won't do the extremes like killing people for you."

"Of course not!" Minho laughs, "I want you to give me a good massage on my shoulders with your strong-looking hands. This bed caused me so much pain. I miss my bed." 

"Okay." Chan complies and sits behind Minho and starts massaging his shoulders; Minho began to feel relaxed. "By the way, do you want me to tell Jisung that you're here? He is so stressed about you and asked around." 

"He was?" 

"He is so worried about you, Minho. I think it would be fair if he can see you am I right?" Minho thinks about it quickly. He misses him a lot too. He wanted to see him even if he was a little awkward about him after the kiss. 

"Okay, tell him that I'm here."

"Great, I'll tell him. I can imagine how happy he will be to see you again."

"I'll be just as happy," Minho smiles.

\--------

"Hyunjin." The voice was chilling like a breeze. He cringes at that voice and tries to disregard it. He despises Jeongin now. Ever since he saw Jeongin kiss that boy, his heart stung in pain. 

Jeongin is a bastard. He is a liar. How can he say such faulty words with eyes coated entirely of sadness? The unbreakable love he claimed for Hyunjin was just a massive jumble of lies - the 'unbreakable' love is fake for him to say if his lips were all up against Sunwoo's. If Jeongin loved him, why did he move on to another guy and suck his pretty lips?

What hurts the most is that Hyunjin still loves Jeongin, and the pain of being parted from him is excruciating. He wished he could stay by his side for long; however, deep inside, he could no longer bring himself to achieve that wish. So he picks up his pace, hoping that Jeongin would get the sign that Hyunjin doesn't want to talk to him anymore. 

Forget him.

"Hyunjin, wait!"

Fuck it. 

Hyunjin furrows his eyebrows and takes off, and swiftly turns a corner. Much to his annoyment, though, the cheetah grabbed him by his backpack and shoved him against the wall. Hyunjin tries to escape, but Jeongin places his hands on either side of Hyunjin's head. "Can you stop running away from me? I want to talk to you." Talk to him? He wasn't going to do that; he knows he is going to hear excuses from him. Hyunjin sinks so he can leave, but Jeongin goes down along with him. There was no way to escape. 

"What do you want now?" Hyunjin says out of spite, trying to sound hateful and disgusted. At least that affected Jeongin; he looked pained by Hyunjin's cold expression and words. "You shouldn't bother wasting your time on me. Bother your new boyfriend; I'm sure he does so much better for you than me. I've always just been a disappointment in your eyes when I tried to hang out with my friends. I'm sure Sunwoo does a better job and neglects his friends just for you." 

"Hyunjin, I'm sorr-"

"Saying sorry won't fix things. Nor will your lies. You said that you loved me but now are dating that pretty person. Tch. Please don't get on my nerves anymore. Want me to tell you what will fix things? You leaving me alone so that I can forget your fucking face and forget about loving you." 

"How about we start over?" Jeongin pleads. "I will be better for you." 

"No thanks," Hyunjin rolls his eyes. "I already have a boyfriend." 

"You're lying." Jeongin's expression darkens so fast, this time, Hyunjin didn't get uneasy with it; he also looked back menacingly. "If you do have a boyfriend, tell me who it is." 

"And have you attack them? No way! You have your boyfriend, what's the big deal, can't I date someone else too? That's what you're doing." 

Jeongin glares at him; his orbs were so dark and scary. Hyunjin couldn't maintain his spike of courage. Giving up, he lets out a breath and drops his head, only for Jeongin to place his finger right beneath his chin and lift his head once again. Hyunjin shifted his gaze elsewhere, trying his best to avoid Jeongin's look. "See you are lying." 

_ You're bad at lying, and you look down whenever you feel nervous or anxious about something. _

"Look at me, Hwang Hyunjin." Hyunjin doesn't listen. " _ Look _ at me," Jeongin says in a demanding way, and the taller boy finally complies. "Tell me the truth."

_ Someone save me. _ Hyunjin tried his best not to cry. 

"Jeongin...I hate you." Jeongin lets his arms fall to his sides, his gaze wavering. Hyunjin uses this opportunity to leave, but Jeongin quickly latched his hand tightly around Hyunjin's wrist. "Stop, Jeongin, just stop. Let's move on."

"I thought you said you couldn't let me go?" 

"I can't, Jeongin. I can't. But it will take some time, and I will learn to let you go. It's starting to feel easier."  _ Lies _ . Hyunjin tries to yank his hand away, but Jeongin tightens his grip painfully, making him wince. "What the hell? You're hurting me." 

"You can't do this," Jeongin sighs, "We love each other." 

Hyunjin starts crying, and the hot tears were clouding his vision. "You don't love me, Jeongin. You have your boyfriend." He sucks in a breath as his hot tears fell from his eyes. "Have fun fucking him." That seemed to strike Jeongin. 

"Hyunjin I-" 

"What is going on here?" Hyunjin recognized that voice; it was his dance teacher. Both of them turned their heads, and Hyunjin smiles in relief and wipes away his tears with his free hand. 

"Nothing," Jeongin quickly says. 

" _ Jinyoung Hyung _ ." Hyunjin pouts sadly and looks at him with pleading eyes, trying to send him a signal. Jinyoung got the sign and looked at Jeongin with his eyebrows furrowed, and his eyes narrowed. Hyunjin will freeze if he was under the glare. 

"Let him go," Jinyoung sternly says, and Jeongin immediately does. The teacher places his hand on Hyunjin's shoulder and looks at him, worried. "Are you okay? Did he hurt you?" Jeongin scoffs bitterly at that, only to have Jinyoung glare at him again. 

"No," Hyunjin replies. "I wanted to get to class, but he just got in the way." 

"Okay, I'll take you to class." 

"Thanks." Hyunjin smiles. Jinyoung steps in front of Hyunjin and crosses his arms over his chest. 

"Don't touch him again," Jinyoung says, then turns around and places his hand on Hyunjin's shoulder again. "Let's go." 

They headed to dance class, and once inside, he goes over to place his backpack against the wall, Jinyoung follows right behind him. 

"I saw what happened between you guys. He wasn't letting you go, and did he say some hurtful things to you? You were crying and looked like you wanted to leave badly. That's why I stepped in."

"No, I'm okay, and thanks for helping me out. I could've been late for this class." Hyunjin laughs. 

Jinyoung sighs. "Okay, then. You know the drill, warm up your muscles and get ready to practice. If you need to talk to me, stop by and I will listen and do my best to help you." 

Hyunjin smiles appreciatively at him and nods. Jinyoung beams and ruffles Hyunjin's hair before he walked away. Hyunjin got down onto the ground to stretch; he first started by stretching his legs. While he was loosening his muscles, his eyes settle on Felix. He was stretching alone, looking so empty. What hurt Hyunjin was that the smiley person was now a person who never seemed so happy. Usually, in dance class, he was energetic and willing to learn now...he doesn't care. 

Felix meets his eyes, and Hyunjin quickly looks at the mirror. He  _ used _ to value Felix.

\--------

Jisung was walking down the steps alone, but he paused and smiled when he saw Chan coming up the steps. The older noticed him immediately and stepped up the few more steps to be near Jisung. He grins at him and greets Jisung by waving.

"Hey, Chan. Where were you heading?"

"Just up the stairs, nowhere in particular. I'll follow where you are going, where are you planning on going?" 

"Just the Café." 

"Cool. I'll go there with you too. I'd love to get myself something to drink," Chan says and links his arm with Jisung's. "Let's go~." 

When they arrived at the Café, they ordered their drinks separately and settled down at a table, sitting across from each other, waiting for their orders to arrive. Chan ordered a strawberry smoothie, while Jisung went with Mocha and Cheesecake. 

"How are you doing today?" Chan starts with a bland question, and Jisung chews onto his bottom lip while thinking of a response. 

"Umm, I guess I'm doing okay." He shrugs a little.

"You guess?" 

" _ Fine _ . I'm worried about Minho. I wonder where he is, how he is doing, and if he is okay or not." 

"Oh," Chan replies, "Do you want to see him? I can take you to him." Jisung's eyes froze at Chan's in shock. So this whole time, he knew where he was? 

"Where exactly is he?" Jisung asks. Their drinks arrive. Chan picks up his smoothie and immediately starts sipping; however, Jisung doesn't even touch his Mocha and waits for Chan to answer his question. He was more interested in that. 

Chan parts his lips from the straw. "He is in the hospital. I can drive you there right after we finish our drinks." Chan gestures at Jisung's drink, and the blue-haired boy quickly grabs it and starts drinking it. The quicker he finishes, the faster they can head to Minho. 

As said, after finishing drinking, Chan took Jisung in his car, but they didn't directly go to the hospital. Jisung wanted to stop by at the gift shop to get a "get-well" gift for Minho since he has been at the hospital. He bought a small bag filled with chocolates and a teddy bear. Hopefully, it makes Minho happy and comfortable. 

"You're the sweetest person I've ever meant," Chan says as they both got inside his car. Jisung blushed at the compliment and didn't respond since he was too flustered. 

When they arrived at the hospital, they checked in as Minho's visitors, and this is when Jisung realizes that this wasn't just any hospital, this is a Psychiatric hospital. Jisung felt so much worse than he did before, and he came back into imagining negative things - was Minho here because Jisung made him feel that way? Minho is getting treatment  _ mentally _ ; no wonder why his mom said it was private. Jisung felt so bad for being oblivious of the signs. 

Chan leads him to where Minho's room was. When he opened the door, Jisung's eyes immediately filled with tears. "Minho..." Minho smiles at him and spreads his arms. Jisung ran towards him and hugged him. "Minho, I was so worried about you. I missed you so, so, so much." 

"Sorry for not informing you about my whereabouts, and for making you worried." 

"Are you okay? You're here in a mental hospital, did you-"

"I'm okay, Jisung, don't worry, it's a long story," Minho sighs. 

Jisung pulls away from Minho to cup his face; he examines it all over, checking for injuries. "You aren't hurt, are you?" Minho purses his lips and shakes his head. Jisung keeps one hand at Minho's cheek and used the other to swipe Minho's fringe away from his eye. "That's a relief." 

Minho wraps his arm around Jisun'g waist and rests his head against his shoulder. "I'm glad you are here." 

Chan coughs, pulling the two from their pleasant little moment. "Um, I'll leave you two here alone. I need to go get something real quick." They watched as he exited the room before they turned their gaze back at each other. 

"I miss you so much and can't wait until you're back at school," Jisung says.

"I can't wait either," Minho sighs, "I don't want to be here."

"Aren't you freely able to get out whenever you want? You aren't a minor." 

"I'm forced to be here. They think I will harm myself or others," Minho replies, "Even though I won't." 

"They didn't believe you?"

"Pft, nope. Even my mom doesn't believe me. She sides with them." 

"Is there any way I can help you?" Jisung cocks his head to the side a little. 

"Yeah." 

Jisung feels himself lift, and he smiles. Minho mimics the smile and presses a hand onto Jisung's cheek, warming up the spot significantly. 

"How can I help?" Jisung asks in a softer tone. 

"I'll tell you." Minho moves his hand away. "But um...don't feel too weirded out or scared, okay?" 

"I won't," Jisung assures him with a smile. There wasn't anything to be scared about, was there? Minho isn't a scary person. When Jisung first encountered him, he did seem pretty scary - his cold 'I don't give a shit' expression, and overall the way he looks and acted gave off that demeanor of him being a whole scary jerk. Now Jisung sees him as the total opposite. Minho is a rose. At first, he seems so prickly, but actually, he is so much more - beautiful, elegant, and charming and admired by almost everyone. 

With a cautious look to his face and worry in his eyes for no reason, Minho explained everything. If Minho thought Jisung was disgusted, he is wrong. Jisung wasn't much at all affected in any way. Well, he was - his heart felt like it was going to burst. He was okay with the things Minho wrote about him. Minho writing about him obsessively? Such a pleasure. He couldn't believe Minho loved him so much to the point that he wrote about him frequently. 

"Am I uh...allowed to kiss you?" Jisung asks. 

Minho widens his eyes a little. "I mean, if you want to, then you can, I don't mind." Jisung hesitantly leans closer to his face and captures his lips into his. He felt warmth spread over his body as Minho rested his hot hands onto his waist. It was such a comforting gesture. It made Jisung feel so secured and loved. 

In return, Jisung pressed his hands onto the sides of Minho's shoulders and pushed him down onto the bed, they parted from each other, and Minho scoots back a little. Jisung climbed onto the bed, his knees were on the sides of Minho's thighs, and he cups Minho's face and looks into his eyes. "I love you."

Minho grabs Jisung by the waist and flips their position. The blue-haired boy was now lying flat on his back, with Minho hovering right above him. "I love you too. I can't believe this is happening."

They both looked into each other's eyes lovingly again. "I can't believe it too." Then he flashes a smile. "Will you be my boyfriend?" Minho presses his forehead against Jisung's hot one. 

"Yes," the brunette breathes out and smashes his lips onto Jisung's. Once again, they are absorbed into their little world, and Jisung just didn't want to get out; he felt so alive, and he was melting under Minho's grasp. Jisung has never experienced a kiss - Jisung did with Daekhwa, but it was only a simple little peck. However, kissing Minho was something else, something so compelling and meaningful. It's undoubtfully one of the best experiences ever, and his heart is engulfed by love. 

They separate, wanting to catch their breaths. Their lips were merely a few centimeters away, and Jisung could feel Minho's hot breath brush against his lips. 

"How long can I stay here?"

"There is a time limit, but you can hide under my bed if you want," Minho laughs, and moves away from Jisung to sit on the edge of the bed. Jisung immediately sits up and transfers to Minho's lap. "But the floor is pretty cold, and you'll feel uncomfortable down there. Or maybe you won't. You've slept outside, on a bench in the morning, though. I'm sure you're capable of sleeping on the floor."

Jisung purses his lips and flicks Minho's forehead. "That's ages ago!" 

"Ouch, you hurt me," Minho whines and pouts. 

Jisung cackles at him. " _ Oh _ . How may I help your injury?"

Minho points at his forehead, "Kiss?" 

Jisung feels his face burn; nevertheless, he grabs Minho's face with his two hands and presses his lips on the spot he flicked. He separates himself from Minho's thigh and stands right before him to peer down at his flushed face. He was pouting at the loss of Jisung's body, and Jisung responds with a laugh. 

"Let's focus on getting you out of here, shall we?" 

"Yeah," Minho responds. "Now, come back here." He pats his lap, and Jisung placed himself there, but this time with his back pressed against Minho's chest. "I focus better when you are sitting on me." The brunette wrapped his arms around Jisung's waist and pressed his lips on his neck.

"It seems like you get distracted when I'm sitting on you," Jisung retorts jokingly. 

"Mhm, very distracted." 

The door opened, and Chan stepped inside, holding onto a bag. "I'm back." He walked towards the bed and threw the bag by Minho. The brunette removed his arms from around Jisung to reach for the bag; Jisung got off his lap again. "Jisung left this in my car. He bought these as a gift for you." Minho looks at Jisung, then he reaches into the bag and pulls out the teddy bear. He stared at it for a few seconds and then broke out into tears, confusing Jisung and Chan. 

"Hyung, what's wrong?" 

"N-nothing," Minho replies and rakes the fur with his fingers. "I'm just touched, thank you, Jisung." He reaches into the bag again and pulls out a bag filled with chocolate. "And you got me chocolate? You're so kind, but you didn't need to get me a gift, you're all I need." 

"Aww, are you two finally together? So cute~," Chan coos. Barely a second later, his expression falters into a blank expression. "Sorry to break it to you two, but we need to get Minho out of here before he goes ballistic. He endured this place for long already. Minho, are you allowed to leave your room currently?"

"Nope, I don't think so," he sighs. 

"That's okay. We will talk to your therapist for you. Will find out who the therapist is and try to convince them. It may go well since we have Jisung with us." Jisung's shifts his eyes from Chan back to Minho, and he smiles at the brunette reassuringly. 

"Thank you two," Minho says. 

Finding the therapist wasn't hard. They just asked one of the staff about who Minho's therapist was, and the lady just typed in Minho's name and pulled up the therapist's name. They found his office and sat down at the chair right by the door. The therapist was currently speaking to someone. 

"I hope this works out, and I hope we can bring Minho out of here," Jisung breaks the silence by speaking his thoughts. Chan hums as a response, not tearing his gaze from the creme colored wall right ahead. 

"If this plan doesn't work," Chan turned his head towards Jisung and smirked at him - it's entirely pride-filled. "I have another plan."

Once the patient in that office left, the therapist stepped out and looked at Jisung and Chan before gesturing to them to step inside. The room was empty and so bare but in a calming way. Against the wall was a blue-colored couch, and right in front of it was a chair. 

"Hello, what brings you two here at this time, unannounced?" Dr.Lee asks when the two boys sat down onto the couch. 

"Um, it's about Minho," Jisung starts, "Is it possible for him to get a discharge today? He is okay." 

"Hmm..." Dr.Lee stares straight at Jisung suspiciously, and it was making him awkwardly shift in his seat. He tried his best not to show any signs of fear or any specific reaction. "My conferences with him doesn't indicate that he is okay. Nor has he improved since the first visit. Our goal is to get him to open up to help him resolve the situations he is facing, but it is currently a challenge. I know you two want your friend out desperately, but think about what good being here is doing for him. He will improve, and he will return. Just be patient." 

"The reason why he isn't opening up is that he isn't comfortable in the environment he is in. He doesn't like it here," Chan replies, the annoyment in his voice is peaking. "There is no good in whatever you're doing. Clearly, your ways aren't helping him, and that's why he isn't improving. Minho would rather be at his own home than here. He has things to take care of; finals are a couple of weeks away. University classes are critical." 

"I understand his situation. A lot of students come to this place to seek help. I've contacted his school's counseling center, and he can freely make up his work anytime. There is nothing for you to worry about, nor him. The only thing he should focus on is getting treatment, and you two should support that. He is your friend, don't you want the best for him? If we let him out early, he will be harmful."

What the fuck. This is utterly exasperating, and Jisung had to hold himself from screaming at that bastard right in front of him. Dr.Lee was so unfair - he was only doing what he thinks is right and wasn't broad-minded enough. He needs to look into everyone's viewpoints and not just his own.

"Chan and I know Minho well. He isn't harmful. He isn't the type to cause danger nor harm himself."

"I wonder if your opinion will change once you look into his diary." 

Jisung snorts bitterly and stands up swiftly. "Look into his diary? I trust him. I don't want to flip through the pages just to jump into conclusions, and to invade his privacy, like how you did." 

"He is dangerous, his note-"

"Notebook, notebook, notebook! Fuck his notebook!" Chan growls, "You think a notebook is an efficient enough evidence? Do you believe whatever he wrote in there makes him a dangerous person? Well, you should rethink everything! He writes his feelings in there, that's his way of coping, and some stupid bitch took his notebook and handed it over to the police as if that would save people. Want me to tell you what all that did? It fucking stressed him out to the core! Think about how he feels to have people like you read his notebook." 

"I'm sorry to hear that and thank you for notifying me about his feelings. I will make sure to help him. We'll let him out of here once he is better," the therapist smiles, and Jisung plops back at the couch.

"Better?  _ Better? _ " Chan spat, "His mom is a lawyer!" 

There was an awkward silence, and Jisung could feel second-hand embarrassment. Chan didn't have to bring up such a point. 

"Yes, I'm aware of that." The therapist raises a brow. Chan drops his shoulder, giving up. 

"Dr.Lee. Minho told me how he felt, and he told me somethings he wrote in the notebook," Jisung says, "He wrote a lot about me, and I don't feel much at all endangered."

"What is your name?" 

"Han, Jisung." 

"Hmm, okay. Are you sure? Or did Minho persuade you to lie?"

"Minho would never persuade me to lie!" Jisung scoffs, "Yeah, he wants to leave this place, but he wouldn't urge me to lie. Oh, and I'm not uncomfortable around him at all. I'm so glad that he wrote about me." 

"There are other things that are concerning, and he needs treatment for them. I know you two are upset that you can't see him often, but remember you're free to visit here often." 

"Minho isn't a minor, can't he be able to leave freely?" 

"If Minho came here voluntarily, he could've signed out whenever, but Minho didn't come voluntarily; therefore, he needs to be here until he shows signs of improvement." 

Chan sighs out of frustration. "Thank you for your help," he says sarcastically and gives Dr.Lee a disgusted look. Jisung glanced at the therapist's face, and he didn't seem offended, nor was he bothered; he looked so calm. 

The two stood up, not fretting about giving a proper farewell, and they left instantly. When the two arrived at Minho's room, the brunette looked at them with curiosity - that look hurt Jisung; he didn't want to see Minho deflate once he hears the results. 

"Hyung, we tried." Jisung's voice cracked, and Minho promptly got out of the bed to walk over to Jisung. "Your therapist was too stubborn." 

Minho cupped his face. "It's okay, Jisung,  _ it's okay _ . I can pretend that I am improving and can wait a few more days. I've been here for days already. I will try to last a little more."

Jisung places his hands on top of Minho's and gives him an apologetic look. "I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize, it isn't your fault," Minho responds and kisses him on the forehead; Jisung blushes. 

"Hey, you two! Don't get too ahead of yourselves," Chan sighs, "Jisung, I already told you that I have another plan; don't be sad. This plan will work wonders. If they don't let you out, we will sneak you out of here." 

"Are you sure it's going to work?" Minho asks worriedly and removes his hand from Jisung's face. 

Chan ignores him and walks out of the room. Jisung looks at Minho in the same fear, but then he relaxed his face, reached for Minho's hand, and grasped onto it, pulling him out of the room. 

"Wait." Minho rips his hand away and rushes back into the room. Jisung watched as the older grabbed his chocolate bag and the stuffed bear and strolled over to Jisung. 

"Want me to hold onto the chocolate for you?" Jisung asked. Minho nodded as a reply and handed Jisung the chocolate. He put the chocolate into his hoodie pocket and grabbed Minho's hand again. 

"Coast is clear," Chan says. They followed right after Chan quickly, and Jisung sighed in relief once they stepped inside the elevator. They headed down to the main floor and hurried out. 

"Let's not act-"

"Hey! You're not supposed to leave this building!" Someone shouted, cutting Chan off from completing his sentence. They turned around, surprised, and spotted a lady pointing right at them or Minho. Jisung tightens his hold on Minho's hand and pulls him near his body, trying his best to protect him. 

Chan leans in and whispers into Jisung's ear. "Let's not just stand here, run with me." They sprinted towards the main door, and Chan pushed it open, letting Minho and Jisung out first before he closed it. The guards were right at their feet; however, Chan parked his car nearby and quickly unlocked it. Once they got inside, they shut the door. Jisung sat in the back with Minho, who had his head resting against Jisung's shoulder, and he was panting. 

"You're free." Jisung runs his finger through Minho's soft hair. 

"And in trouble," he groans.

"Not unless we talk to your mom," Chan pointed out, and stirred out of the parking area, out into the main road. 

They arrive at Minho's apartment. He unlocked the door, and the three of them stepped inside. When his mom saw the three, she widened her eyes in shock and dropped the papers she held. 

"Hi, mom! Thank you for taking care of my cats. I hope they weren't any trouble," Minho walks over to her and hugs her from behind, placing his chin onto her shoulder. 

"Your clothes...why are you still wearing those hospital clothes? You left without their permission?"

"I came back, and this is the first thing you ask? Are you not happy to see me?" Minho pulls away from her. His mom quickly turned towards him and tightly hugged him. 

"No, I am happy to see you, sweetie, but why did you leave the hospital?" 

"They are pieces of shit, that's why," Minho grumbles, "Why would I want to stay there if I don't want to be there?" His mom removes her arms from around him, and Minho walks towards the couch and sits down, looking up at her like a sad puppy. His mom sighs, tuck her hair behind her ear and sits down next to him.

"Did they help you?" She points at the two that were still standing.

"Um, yes. I know you may disagree with this, but," Chan sits down, and Jisung places himself next to the older. "Since Minho doesn't like it there, should he just not be there? Look at how happy he is now." Chan points at Minho, who had a blank expression at first, but when his mom looked at him, he immediately pulled on an exaggerated smile, flashing his perfect teeth. Whether or not it was fake, Jisung still thought it was so adorable and hilarious. 

"Did they mistreat you there?" She asks, frowning at him pitifully.

"Not quite. It's just that I felt enclosed there. I was so bored, lonely, and sad. I'd rather be here, with my cats, and attending classes like I usually did, and see my precious friends. There isn't anything else that makes me happier than those things. And mom, they think I'm not okay, you think I'm not okay. I say I am okay when I'm not, but that kind of treatment isn't helping me at all. I'm not feeling okay, because someone took my notebook, read it, and revealed it, which hurt me the most." 

"Oh, Minho. I'm sorry you had to go through that. You don't have to be there if you don't want to. And if being around your friends makes you much happier than that place, then that's okay! I will talk to them once I'm free."

"Thank you for understanding," Minho smiles.

"Take care of Minho well," she says to Chan and Jisung; Chan nodded as a reply, and Jisung only smiles. 

"I have another important thing to tell you," Minho smirks, "I have a boyfriend now." He looks right at Jisung, who tries his hardest not to look so flustered, but it was impossible as his heart was beating in apprehension. How will his mom react? Will she be disgusted, after all, he is a boy, wouldn't his mom want Minho to date a-

"You have a boyfriend now? Wow, I didn't think you'd end up dating anyone." Okay, that's a relief; she doesn't seem shocked at all. "Who is this boyfriend of yours?" 

Chan nudges Jisung and snickers unobtrusively. Minho stands up from his spot on the couch and approaches Jisung and places a hand onto his shoulder. "This is my lovely boyfriend, Han Jisung." 

"Ooh, him?" Minho's mom stands up so fast, and her mouth curls into a gleeful smile. "I know this sweet prince! He came by before to check in on you, and he brought along a friend who also likes dancing like you, Hyunjin is his name. You have such divine friends and a boyfriend who cares a lot about you." She walks over to them and gently pinches Jisung's cheek, and then lets it go. The smile hasn't left her face yet, and she was staring at him with admiration. Jisung didn't mind at all; he felt overjoyed. 

"Jisung is so caring, like super caring. He and Minho are perfect for each other," Chan says. "It makes me wish I was in a relationship." 

"He is my future," Minho smiles. 

Does that mean Minho wants to be with him...forever? Is he really his future? How exciting and how flattering. There is nothing else Jisung needs than an entire Minho; he wants to spend a lot of time with him. He always wants to be by his side. Minho is his comfort; he loves being in his arms more than anything else. Jisung stands up and wraps his arms around Minho, and nuzzles his face against his neck. 

"I love him with all my heart and will take care of him well." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And now they are finally dating!! :''D


	21. A kiss a day keeps the coldness away

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Mild smut at the beginning of the chapter and mention of suicide near the end of the chapter.

"You're the only one I loved this much," Minho mutters, tilts Jisungs head to the side, and presses kisses onto his neck. His lips were a fire burning against his skin. "All my love is for you, baby." Then a wet kiss landed on his jaw, and the brunette's fingers trailed down his covered chest and paused at his stomach. "It was so hard to get you, but now you are all mine. You are so important to me." 

Jisung shuts his eyes when Minho's licks up his neck with his hot wet tongue. He felt so heated, and his breaths came out unstably. He breathily moans out Minho's name as the older pulled down the collar of his t-shirt and kissed his collarbone. 

"I'm taking away your breaths, aren't I? You can't resist me." He moves to lick Jisung's ear and nibbled at the lobe. It causes Jisung to squirm and makes his groin twitch. He uselessly squeezes his thighs together to stop that feeling down there, but it only made it worse. Minho hadn't noticed yet as he was busy working on Jisung ear. 

All Jisung could think about was how much it was burning down there, and he squeezes his inner thighs harder, he felt so feeble, yet Jisung didn't want to tell Minho; who now was pressing soft kisses on his jawline again. When the tension down there started getting unbearable, Jisung titled his head back and arched his back. He had to bite onto his tongue to suppress his moans. 

Only then Minho parts from him to look at his face. He smiles at him and presses a kiss onto his lips. "Don't hide it. Your voice is music to my ears. Literally." 

His hands reach underneath Jisung's shirt, and his hands roamed around Jisung's stomach. It tickled and felt so good, and Jisung was beginning to feel overwhelmed with so many emotions. Once Minho's finger brushed against his hard bud, it felt like he broke, and the wetness in his boxer disturbed him so much.

He pushes Minho away and dashes out of his bedroom. He could hear his worried voice call out after him, accompanied by the thundering of his quick steps. 

Jisung opened the door to Minho's bathroom and quickly closed it. He walks to the toilet and sits down. The fluid leaked out of his boxers, and he could see the embarrassing wet patch on his dark blue jeans. 

Minho knocks on the door. "Jisung, are you okay? Did I make you uncomfortable? I'm sorry if I did." Jisung furrows his brows and lets out an annoyed sigh. He didn't want him to apologize; he didn't do anything wrong. Jisung was the wrong one. How could the mere kisses against him affect him that way and cause him to wet himself? 

_ What do I do, what do I do? _ He frantically searches around the bathroom for something to help him out, and his eyes stop right at the toilet paper. Clean and flush. It's going to be okay, and Jisung was sure that Minho wouldn't know about any of this. But he had to expect his interrogations once he leaves the bathroom. And the damned wet spot on his jeans is going to do a great job of answering the questions.

"Jisung, you're quiet in there. Please tell me if you are okay."

"I'm okay, Minho. You don't have to worry," Jisung rapidly replies.

He lifts himself from the toilet a little, unzips his pants, and pulls down his jeans and boxer before sitting back down. The sight below him makes him cringe. He inhales sharply, rips out the toilet paper-

"Are you okay with me coming in?" The knob turns, Jisung widened his eyes. There was no way out of this. He was about to get caught red-handed and bare.

"Oh," Minho says when he notices Jisung - frozen, toilet paper in hand, staring right at the brunette. Jisung could feel himself turn tomato red, and he turns his head away when tears spilled from his eyes. 

"Jisung, baby! It's okay, don't cry." Minho rushes to Jisung and kneels in front of him. "Tell me what's wrong, lovely. Did I make you uncomfortable back there?" 

"Don't- don't sit in front of me like that!" Jisung says and clasps his hand on his length, covering it from Minho's sight. What's the point? Minho most likely saw it, or not...he didn't look down, did he? Jisung hoped not. 

"Why not?" Minho cocks his head to the side, his eyes staying at Jisung's eyes. 

"J-just close your eyes, please," Jisung replies. 

"Okay." Minho closes his eyes. "Talk to me. Tell me what's wrong." 

Jisung rolls his eyes at him. "You probably wouldn't want to hear it. You might be disturbed."

"Why would I be disturbed?" Minho opens his eyes and places his hand on top of Jisung's, stroking it with his fingertips. 

"Because..." Jisung hesitates. 

"Mhm, go on. Tell me." 

"Can you leave? I'll come out in a bit," Jisung says. 

"I'm not leaving until you tell me what is going on. You don't look so good, and I want to make you feel better." Jisung shivered at the last few words and thought of it the wrong way.  _ Dirty, dirty, dirty _ , he scolds himself in his mind.

"Minho, it's embarrassing!" Jisung looks down, "I-"

"I don't think there is anything for you to be embarrassed about." Minho rips Jisung's hand away from his length and stares at it for a few seconds, making Jisung blush hard. 

"S-stop looking! It's a mess!" Jisung yelps and presses his free hand onto Minho's face. Almost immediately, he realized his big mistake - Jisung's hand has a lot of his warm white sticky fluid. "I'm sorry..." Minho pulls Jisung's hand away from his face. His expression is unreadable. Jisung tried to think about how he was feeling right now; was he pleased? Or is he going to humiliate him? Jisung felt a lump in his throat, his eyes preparing the next round of tears. The feeling stops when Minho's lets a breath escape past his lips and smirks. 

He then stands up, walked towards the bathroom sink, and peered at himself in front of the large mirror. Minho was  _ smiling _ . 

"Thank you," Minho says. Jisung went from being worried to be baffled. 

"What do you mean?" Jisung asks. Minho walked back towards him and knelt in front of him again. 

"I look so good with it on my face. My face is your canvas. You painted it so prettily."

"Minho! It's...I..."

Minho doesn't say anything and grabs Jisung's hand, licks his bottom lip, and presses his tongue against Jisung's palm, making him shudder. 

"What are you doing? It's dirty." 

Minho ignores him and licks all the seeds off Jisung's palm and looks up at him. His eyes fogged with something Jisung couldn't perceive.

"You're so dirty, did this happen to you because of what I did to you? Is that right?" 

"No! I mean...yeah. It's not weird, is it? This happening to me because of you kissing me?" Jisung asked embarrassedly. Minho lets go of Jisung's hand. There wasn't any expression; he seemed fine; there wasn't anything that made Jisung feel so insecure or fearful. 

"No, not at all, hot stuff," Minho says, stands up and wipes some of the white off his face and licks it all clean from his hand. "Don't be embarrassed, okay? There is nothing for you to be embarrassed about, baby." He lifts Jisung from the toilet so that he was standing, and presses a firm kiss onto his lips. He grabs the toilet paper from Jisung's hand, steps over to the toilet and tosses it in there, and flushes it down. Jisung frowns because he was going to use it to clean himself. 

"Can I help you clean up? If you're okay with it," Minho asks while ripping more toilet paper.

"Yeah...sure." Minho moves back towards him and kneels again; Jisung began feeling bashful about this because the brunette was looking right at his length. Instead of feeling warm like earlier, it felt so cold now, likely because the bathroom was chilly. 

Minho cautiously and gently holds onto Jisung's shaft; it was lazing flat on his palm. That touch was like being electrocuted, and Jisung was trying his best not to feel anything, though it was challenging. At least the coldness disappeared. 

Minho carefully cleans Jisung, throws the toilet paper into the toilet, flushes it, and returns to Jisung to pull up his pants and boxers. "All done." 

"Thanks."

"Be honest with me," Minho says, looking Jisung in the eye, his gaze soft and relaxed. "Did I make you uncomfortable in any way?"

"I didn't feel uncomfortable...at least I am not now." 

"So I  _ did _ make you-"

"No! Actually...in a way you did, but in a good way." Jisung smiles, and Minho raises a brow. "You made me feel uncomfortably hot, you know, making me feel so hot that I had to come to the bathroom." 

"I see." Minho smiles, looking very relieved. He stands up and traces Jisung's jaw with his pointer finger and smiles. "Get changed; it must be so uncomfortable in those now that you-" he gestures at Jisung's jean, immediately making his face flush, and he averts his gaze. "You can pick anything out of my closet, and I'll go prepare dinner." He ruffles Jisung's hair and steps over to the bathroom sink to wash his hands and face and leaves. Jisung does the same and heads towards Minho's room to replace his dirtied boxers and jeans. 

Once he finished changing, he headed out of Minho's room to meet with such a gratifying smell, so gratifying it causes his stomach to growl. He silently scolds it before he strolls over to the kitchen, where Minho was at, cooking a meal. He sneaked up from behind him and peeked at what he was cooking. Within the pan was ramen along with Tteokbokki, a combination of two of his favorites. 

"Smells nice, doesn't it?" Minho suddenly says as if he sensed his presence. 

Jisung nods. "Nice enough to make me super hungry."

"It'll finish within a few minutes," Minho chuckles, "You'll love it." 

Once the meal was ready, Minho set a bowl in front of Jisung, who peered down at in awe, and his stomach let out a growl again. Minho laughs softly and sits across from him. The smile on his face is so huge.

"I hope you like the taste. I tried my best." 

Jisung picked up the chopsticks and picked up the ramen. He widened his eyes when the stringy cheese came up with the ramen. Although he did have cheesy ramen countless times before, the one Minho made is extraordinary for him. Better than the ones Jisung made at the convenience stores. 

Seeing that Minho was waiting for him to eat, he puts it into his mouth. It tasted so good, even though it was a little spicy, and he could feel the contents burn in the back of his throat. He wasn't going to tell Minho  _ that _ . He disguised the slight pain with a smile on his face. 

"You're such a good cook," Jisung stated once he swallowed. 

"Thank you," Minho replies, "You seem to be enjoying it a lot, even though it is a little too spicy for your liking." 

"How did you know?"

"Your eyes are getting watery." Minho laughs.

"It isn't too spicy, I am okay," Jisung says, "I love your cooking so much."

"Maybe I should cook for you often."

"For free?" Jisung playfully widens his eyes. 

"No, you have to pay," Minho smirks, "Pay with a kiss." 

"How many kisses you even need?" Jisung says.

"Hm." Minho props his head with his fist and thinks. "Your kisses make me feel so happy. I love it when we kiss. To answer your question, I need them every day. I need you every day, so be with me every day, and don't leave my side." 

Jisung couldn't tell if he was lovey-dovey or sappy. Be with him every day? What makes him think that Jisung  _ wasn't  _ going to be with him every day? Regardless, Jisung wanted to show him that he will remain by his side and give him as many kisses as he wants. 

"I'll always be with you, Minho," Jisung says as he stands up from the chair. He walks over to the brunette's side and lifts his head and presses a kiss on his lips. When Jisung pulled away, Minho stood up, grabbed Jisung's waist, and did the same in return; the only difference was that he was kissing harder. 

He pulls away, the only thing barely connecting them was the thin string of saliva against their lips.

"You make me go insane," Minho whispers and lets go of Jisung. "It's going to be hard to control myself when I'm around you."

"You don't need to control yourself around me," Jisung replies and grins. 

"Don't smile at me like that," Minho turns his face away. 

The two returned to finishing up the dinner. Once the two were done, Minho stands up. "I'll wash the dishes; you can wait for me on the couch." 

Before Jisung could reply, Minho picked up their bowls and headed towards the sink to wash them. Jisung sighs, head over to the living room, and sits down on the couch. When his phone sounded, he took it out of his pocket and saw Hyunjin's name right before the screen; happy that he called, he answered. 

"Hey, Hyunjin."

"Jisung! How is it over at Minho's place?" Hyunjin replies quite enthusiastically.

"It's nice being here with him, he is so sweet to me, and even cooked me a nice meal. The best thing I've ever had, other than the cheesecake I sometimes eat," Jisung says in a partially quiet tone, trying not to be too loud, "He is the cutest ever." 

"Did you two do anything together?" Hyunjin asks, and Jisung could almost feel the large smirk in his voice. He felt his face burn again. How many times in a day will it burn like this? He wanted to scold Hyunjin for asking such a question; it made him remember what happened a couple of minutes ago. It wasn't something too much. All they did was kiss, and Minho said somethings to him that brought Jisung into a situation he didn't even want to think about at all. 

"We didn't do anything like what you're thinking," Jisung says defensively, "Put your imagination elsewhere." 

"Okay, okay!" Hyunjin laughs, "I'll stop. See you tomorrow!"

"Bye-bye!" Jisung hangs up and places his phone onto Minho's coffee table. 

"You should've told him that my words made you wet," Minho says. Jisung turns around a little, seeing Minho leaning against the couch from behind him. The brunette smirks, walk over to Jisung and sits down. "You should've bragged about what happened. I think it was-" 

"You wash dishes pretty fast," Jisung cuts Minho off with a different subject. Minho chuckles and shifts to lay down, resting his head onto Jisung's thighs. The younger caressed Minho's hair, feeling the softness. Minho sighs, satisfied. 

"Yeah, it was only two bowls. Is Jisungie feeling flustered again? Look at how red you are," Minho says in an exaggerated cutesy way, making Jisung lightly smack him in the head. "What? I'm telling you the truth, do you need photo proof?" 

"No, it's not like that!" Jisung retorts and lifts Minho's head to remove himself from the couch. Minho sits up almost instantly and stares over at him, perplexed. 

"Are you mad at me?" He asks; Jisung shakes his head right away. Minho purses his lips - it looked like he didn't believe Jisung. He pats his lap, looking at Jisung with a gloomy look. "Come sit here." Jisung was quick to place himself on the older's lap, facing him. "Are you sure you aren't mad at me? You looked so irritated for a second." 

"There is no reason for me to be mad at you Minho, I'm sorry if I responded so harshly I was just feeling so embarrassed," Jisung says, honestly. 

Minho wraps his arms around Jisung's waist. "Are you still embarrassed about earlier?" Jisung hangs his head when that question's asked. "Jisung, I told you there is nothing for you to be embarrassed about; after all, I'm your boyfriend." He places his finger underneath Jisung's chin and lifts his head. Jisung didn't intend to meet Minho's eyes and instead stared at Minho's chin. "Look at me." Hesitantly, he meets his eyes. "Don't hide it from me again, okay?" 

"Okay..." 

"Good." Minho pecks him on the lip. "Want to watch something with me?"

"Sure." 

\--------

"I forgot to mention this before, but there are a few rules regarding our relationship." Rules in a relationship sounded so unusual for Jisung, especially when it comes to Minho. He didn't think Minho was the type to create regulations.

"Go ahead," He replies, "Hopefully, it isn't too much." 

"No, not much," Minho replies, "Only if you consider too much. You can make adjustments if you'd like, anything that makes you happy." Jisung hums as a reply. "The first rule is to not look at any other person the way you look at me." Jisung heart skips a beat. "The second rule, you shouldn't hide things from me whenever you feel angry or upset towards me. If I upset you in any way, just tell me, and I will be better for you. Hurting you is not my intention. I'll never hurt you, and that's a promise. The third rule, don't go near Daekhwa or don't let him come near you. I don't want him to seduce you and take you from me. He is trash." 

Jisung giggled at the last one. Minho didn't have to worry about Daekhwa anymore. Jisung figured out that Daekhwa wasn't exactly his type, because when they were dating, it was a little awkward, and he couldn't say a few things freely. Jisung felt much more comfortable with Minho, he believed that they suited each other well, and nothing could rip them away. Minho loved him so much, and it showed, and Jisung loves him just as much. 

"Easy rules and easy for me to follow."

They reached the cafeteria and headed over to the lunch table where they spotted Changbin and Chan seated. 

"Awh, my new favorite couple~" Chan smiles up at them, "How are you two doing today?" 

"Nice to see you too," Minho quips and sits down beside Chan, pulling Jisung to sit next to him. 

"You're finally here today. Why didn't you show up to classes yesterday?" Chan asks, "Didn't you leave the hospital the day before?" 

"Hyung, I deserve a good break after what had happened. I didn't feel like showing up yesterday and decided to rest in my apartment. It was so lovely." Minho takes out his lunch from his backpack, and Jisung remembers that Minho prepared lunch for him too and takes it out. 

"Oh, you prepared Jisung lunch too, where you two together yesterday?" Changbin asks, Jisung nods as a response. 

"Yeah, he called me over because he felt lonely." 

"Minho, really can't resist you. You two are such a dream couple." Chan smiles. Jisung lowers his head because of the heat that was searing at his cheeks and his ears' tips. Chan must have noticed because he ends up snickering. "I understand why." 

Minho places his hand onto Jisung's thigh. "I will never be able to resist him. He makes me so happy. I love him so much." The two intertwined their fingers together and looked at each other's faces. Minho quickly smiled at him before he turned his head away.

"I'm glad you two are together. Honestly, seeing you two together makes me feel happy for some reason," Changbin states. 

"Look at what we have here." A new voice Jisung didn't recognize much speaks. He has blonde hair and sharp facial features. Next to him was a boy Jisung did remember, San was his name. The blonde-hair boy sits down next to Changbin, and San sits down next to blonde, immediately staring at Jisung's lunch and then at Minho's. 

"Your food looks so much better than what I bought in this cafeteria." San pouts. "You wouldn't mind switching, would you?" 

"Oh shut it," the blonde-hair boy says with a playful smile to his lips, "Go cook your own food, and stop pestering him. I'm Seonghwa, by the way, it's nice to meet you all!" 

"I'm Changbin."

"You know me." Chan beams.

"Of course!" Seonghwa laughs and points finger guns at Chan. "Thanks for helping me a lot in statistics last year." Then he looks at Jisung. "What's your name?"

"Jisung," he replies.

"Who is Minho's boyfriend," Changbin included. 

San gasps loudly and presses his hands against his head, "You have a boyfriend now?! I didn't expect that of you!" Minho gives him an offended look. 

"Why do you act like you have one? And why are you so surprised?"

San glares at Minho.

"Let him dream, Minho. And don't worry, San, Woo will find out soon because you are way too obvious." Seonghwa then looks at Jisung again, "Hey there, cute boy, is Minho nice to you?" The bright smile was remaining on his lips, though it was softer now. Jisung nods as a reply to the question. 

"He is cute, isn't he?  _ My _ cute boy," Minho warns. 

"Okay, okay, calm down." Seonghwa laughs. 

\-------

"Are you sure you want to go to the dance club? Isn't it going to overwhelm you?" Hyunjin asks Minho, who was hanging out in their dorm. He followed Jisung here, just because he wanted to. 

"Since when is dancing and leading overwhelming for me?" Minho replies. Dance club will be a little overwhelming for him, but not to the extremes; there is Yunho, Ten, and Mingi there to make him feel comfortable and support him. At least Ten is nice enough not to drop Minho from his president position, not that he was bitter towards Yugyeom. He deserved the drop from the dance captain position. They are competitive, and getting things done is crucial for them.

"I'm still going." It irked Minho a little that Hyunjin gave him a concerned look. He wasn't going to back down. He concluded that his backpack had been invaded during the club. His bag was with him the entire day, untouched by anyone else, but dance club was the only possibility for someone to access his backpack because he leaves it aside, and he remembered needing to use the bathroom real quick. His notebook and plushie were there before he went to the dance club and wasn't there when he got out. 

"Then I'm going with you guys," Jisung firmly stated. 

"Really?" Hyunjin smiles.

"Yeah, but only to be around Minho." Minho smiles at what Jisung says and slings an arm around him. 

"Thank you." 

\--------

Minho's heart was pumping a little too fast when he stepped inside the noisy dance practice room. One person pointed right at him, and the student's eyes were all on him. Usually, he would ignore them and continue his way, but this time he smiled and waved at them before he grabbed Jisung's wrist and pulled him along with him towards Ten. 

"Welcome back, again," Ten says, and pats Minho on the shoulder, "Feeling better now? No more injuries?"

"Yeah, I'm feeling just fine," Minho replies. 

"Keep yourself safe," Ten scolds, and his eyes land on Jisung. "You decided to rejoin this club? It's nice to see you here." And he looks at Minho again. "Yunho and Mingi will be coming here in a couple of minutes, they needed to do something real quick." 

"Okay, thanks for letting me know what should I do right now?" Minho asks, a little unsure about what he should do next. He hoped it would be something manageable because he was so behind with the dance club's occurrences.

"Mmm, there isn't too much, but let's wait for Mingi and Yunho to show up; they have an idea for today's activity." 

Minho nods and turns his body towards the students; a few were looking at him and obviously talking about him, and the other's were busy doing their own thing. 

It's hunting time. He examines each of them at his spot, trying to suspect the thief. It had to be someone who had something against him, or were curious about him, trying to get something off of him. Felix? No way. He wouldn't, he's nice...kind of, and isn't well. Hyunjin? Of course not! Yoobin? Nope. Daekhwa? He is too prideful of himself to do such a thing. 

"We're here!" Minho smiles and looks at Mingi, who approached him with a happy look on his face, Yunho was next to him, just as happy. 

A squeeze to his hand makes Minho realize that he was still holding onto Jisung's hand tightly, and he lets it go, giving Jisung an apologetic look before looking at the two secretaries. 

"Finally," Ten sighs, "Explain the activity to us." 

"The activity is so cool! I think everyone will have fun. Yunho named it to spin the bottle, dance." 

"You're so creative," Minho says, very astonished with the idea. "Tell us how it works."

"Of course, President Lee!" Mingi chirps, obviously happy with Minho's response. "So we stand in a circle, and there will be a bottle in the middle of the circle. We play random music, and one of us will spin the bottle, and whoever it lands on will do a short dance in the middle."

"That sounds fun," Ten claps his hands together, "Okay, Minho, let's get it started." The four walk towards the front of the practice room, immediately grabbing everyone's attention. While Yunho announced the game, Minho looked at Jisung and noticed that he was staring off somewhere, the upset look on his face hurt Minho, and he follows his gaze, trying to see what was bringing in that long face on the boy. He notices that Jisung was staring right at Felix's back. It appears that he was sad for him, so he looks at Felix's face and see's how miserable he seems. He wasn't happy for a long time, and his smile seized to exist. It faded long ago. Although he made some friends in this club, the friends he loved ripped away from him. Minho wasn't going to leave him looking like this. He noted to himself to talk to him later. 

The activity starts, Mingi plays the music, and Ten goes into the middle and places a bottle within the circle's center. Jisung was sitting aside, against the wall, staring at the players playing the game. Minho knew that it was because he gets anxious when he is in the center of attention. Felix was standing with his new friends, and Hyunjin was next to Minho.

"Game starts now," Ten declares and spins the bottle. 

During the game, Minho stared at Daekhwa with flames burning within his eyes. Why? Because that bastard eyes would occasionally land on Jisung, and it was making Minho extremely angry. He didn't want the two to have anything to do with each other. He despises that bastard so much. When the bottle pointed at Daekhwa and he got up to dance, Minho gave him a disgusted look and shifted his gaze at Jisung instead. He was watching the whole game with interest. Minho hoped he wasn't watching  _ Daekhwa  _ with any interest. 

They ended the game fifteen minutes before the end of the club. And Minho remembering his mind note headed over to Felix, who was sticking with his new group of friends, not talking to them, only listening to their conversation with a meager smile on his face. 

When Felix noticed Minho approaching, he looked at him blankly. 

"Felix, come with me, I want to talk to you," Minho says. Felix gets up, and the two walk towards the door. Felix didn't push open the door, though. He only looked at Minho with pain in his eyes and a pinch of fear too. 

"Did I do anything wrong again? I'm sorry," He says, his voice cracking. Minho feels something stab into his chest. 

"Don't get too ahead of yourself. I just want to talk to you, let's go." 

They both step outside the practice room. Felix didn't meet with Minho's eyes and only looked at the floor. 

"You've looked so sad for a long time, and it concerns me. I know why you are unhappy. It's because of Hyunjin and Jisung. They turned away from you because of what Jeongin, you, and Seungmin did. I know it's hard for them to forgive you and even trust you, and I know you feel like your far away, embedding within the darkness, but take action instead of sitting ba-" 

Felix starting to sob, breaking Minho away from continuing his sentence. The younger covered his face with his small hands and cried into them, and Minho didn't know what to say to him to soothe him from his tears. When the sobs got uglier and louder, Minho decided to speak. 

"Let it all out. I'll wait." 

Minutes later, Felix's cries turned into soft sniffles, and he frantically wiped away his tears even though more were falling out. 

"You want to fix things with them. I can understand that. You made a mistake. Mistakes are not permanent. Well, they can since they are remembered. But you know what a lot say, mistakes can be learned from. Have you thought about having a sincere conversation with them?" 

"I-I don't think t-they'd even want to listen to me," Felix replies and sniffs afterward, "I was so mean to Jisung, and Hyunjin was upset with what I've done. I don't think they want to forgive me at all. If I were them, I'd be disgusted too, and I wouldn't forgive." 

"Do you want them to forgive you or not? I'm sure you'd like that. Stop assuming how they'd feel and talk to them. If they don't forgive you, then that's okay, because you have me. I was angry with what you did, but I understand how you feel; Jeongin played you and Seungmin trying to achieve his goal of hurting Jisung a lot."

"I believed his words; it doesn't make me any different." Felix turns away, ready to return inside, but Minho grabbed his wrist, pulling him back a little. Felix rolls his eyes, not that Minho was affected by it. The sadness leaked out of his eyes again. 

"Sometimes, I wish I could disappear." Another sob choked out from his throat. "I think about disappearing every day. All I do is hurt people with my presence." 

"Felix, hang on, okay? Everything's going to be alright." 

"That's easy for you to say, Minho. If you were in my place, you'd feel the same shame and regret. Things will be so much better if Felix ended, am I right? No one likes a Lee Felix."

"Stop with this bullshit; you are giving up way too quickly. All you are doing are digging deeper into your hopelessness." 

"Yeah, so what? I want to dig and dig and dig until my face no longer exists in this world."

"Felix..." 

His eyes glistened with tears again, and Minho pulled him into a hug. Felix tried pulling away, but Minho only held onto him tighter. Felix gave up and rested his forehead onto Minho's shoulder and cried again. 

"Whether or not you want it, I'm not going to turn away from you. I want to be by you and carry you. I will support you, no matter what." Those words only made the younger boy cry harder and grabbed hold of Minho's sweatshirt. 

He pulls away from Minho's body. "Thank you for your kind words, and thank you for understanding me. I'm glad you still want to be my friend even after the mistake I've made. I want to stay here alone for a bit. I need to clear my mind." 

"Okay, call me if you want to talk again," Minho replies and smiles at him before returning into the practice room to conclude the meeting. He checked the time on his phone, only two more minutes remaining. 

He looked around for Jisung and saw him with Daekhwa and Hyunjin. The silver-haired boy was trying to have a conversation with Jisung, who looked so bothered. Hyunjin was the first to notice Minho, and he pales. Minho grits his teeth and steps over to them. 

"The fuck are you doing with him?" Minho growls, and places his hands onto Jisung's waist, drawing him closer to his body, "He is mine now." 

"Oh, you two are dating now? How lovely. Jisung you got yourself a protective boyfriend, didn't you? Do you like impulsive types of people like him? I'm surprised by your taste, buddy. Last well you two," Daekhwa says so annoyingly. 

"Shut up. I'm not impulsive. I think you are talking about yourself," Minho retorts. 

"I can see you're the overprotective type, keeping Jisung away from me. It's not like I'm going to harm him. We are friends still, aren't we Jisung?" Before Jisung could answer, Minho grabbed him by the wrist harshly, not giving his pain any thought, and pulls him to the other side of the practice room. Hyunjin follows after them too and looked so concerned - looking at Jisung with worry first and then looking at Minho cautiously. 

"What was the third rule?" Minho sternly says to the blue-haired boy. 

"Wait you have rules?!" Hyunjin asks Minho. 

"What was the _third rule_ , Jisung," Minho asks again, ignoring Hyunjin's presence for now. 

"To keep away from Daekhwa...and not let him come near me," Jisung mutters softly and looks down in guilt. 

"And what did you do?" 

"Let him come near me." 

"Minho, you know he can't control who comes near him or not! Stop making him feel so horrible!"

"Hyunjin Hyung, it's okay," Jisung says, water leaking from his eyes. Minho felt like he was the cruelest person alive for hurting someone so soft-hearted. He reaches out to wipe the tears away, but before he could, Jisung pushes his hands away. "I'll leave first, I'm sorry." 

Before Minho could reply, Jisung rushed away. 

"Minho, you're fucked up, just like Jeongin." Hyunjin shoots him a cold glare before running after Jisung.

_ Jeongin.  _

Minho wasn't like him at all. Was he? 


	22. Losing his light

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Helloo sorry for this late update; I barely had time to edit this chapter as I was loaded with assignments my dumbo self procrastinated on ( I regret it) xD Thankfully I forced myself to wake up early to finish editing this chapter. I hope you enjoy this chapter, another one of my favorites~! ^^

"Jisung!"

The said boy halts in his steps and spins around to see Hyunjin advancing towards him. Once Hyunjin was right in front of Jisung, he lets out a little huff, seeming so apprehensive. 

"Are you okay?" Hyunjin manages to ask.

"Yeah, I'm fine, besides feeling like complete trash, or worse, a nightmare bringing rodent," Jisung replies, feeling awful for breaking one of Minho's rules and upsetting him. The rules were so fucking easy to follow, but he just  _ had _ to ruin it. He messed up and let Daekhwa talk to him. He had to admit, it wasn't relatively easy to follow; he couldn't ignore people right off the bat like that. Daekhwa did nothing wrong and is a genuine person. 

"Minho does seem overprotective over you. He sounded pretty angry at you, and it made me lose my control over my mouth and my emotions. What he did reminded me so much of Jeongin, even when I try to forget about him. He just has to end up in my mind so easily, lucky him." Hyunjin scoffs, a scowl on his face. "I hope Minho didn't frighten you. He felt bad afterward." 

"I just feel so guilty about what I did," Jisung admits. They both started walking together, their destination being their dorm, of course. 

"There is no need for you to be guilty. Minho yelled at you; that wasn't so reasonable of him. He is a pretty turbulent person and explodes quickly. Still, he needs to control himself better, especially around you," Hyunjin explains, his tone very firm. Jisung opposed what Hyunjin said; he didn't think Minho was wrong; he had every reason to be exasperated. 

"His anger is understandable. He doesn't like Daekhwa, he told me that, yet I still let Daekhwa approach me." Jisung's phone vibrated, and he reaches into his pocket to drag it out. Barely within a single glimpse at the screen, his phone powered off right away on its own due to the drained battery. 

"Pft. I don't like Daekhwa either," Hyunjin laughs softly. "I understand Minho on that, but he doesn't need to tell you what to do and what not to do. He is treating you like a child. He has rules, right? I'm sure I didn't mishear that." 

"Yeah, Minho made rules for me. I don't think it's a big deal. It just hurts him when I don't follow him." 

"Angers him," Hyunjn sternly corrects. Jisung gives him a half-hearted laugh, not thrilled because he didn't like how furious Hyunjin was towards Minho. 

They reach their dorm, and Hyunjin unlocked the door and let Jisung step in first before he let himself in. Jisung sighed and remembering that his phone is dead, he heads over to his desk, finds his charger, and plugs his phone into the cable. He turned on his phone and waited for it to power up. 

"Phone died?" Hyunjin jokes. Jisung turns his head to him and gives him a comical dirty look before looking back at his phone. Just by seeing Minho's name on the screen, he quickly types in his password and opens up Minho's messages; there were so many. It was enough to cause Jisung's heart to descend so far. 

Minho [5:55 PM]: Jisung, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to lash on you like that. 

Minho [5:55 PM]: Jiiisuuuung

Minho [5:56 PM]: Jiiiiiiisuuuunnng 

Minho [5:56 PM]: Are you mad at me? Please don't be mad at me. 

Minho [5:57 PM]: Are you ignoring me? Let's talk it out. 

Minho [5:57 PM]: Jisungie baby 

Minho [5:58 PM]: I love you a lot

Minho [6:00 PM]: I have to conclude the meeting; I'll text you shortly. 

Jisung finished reading those texts. His hands were shaking so much, and his mind was speeding like a bullet train. He screwed up once again. He goes to reply to the messages, not wanting Minho to think he was ignoring him. Jisung would never neglect someone so generous like Minho, who frequently cares about him. 

Before he could type in a reply, another message showed up. 

Minho [6:10 PM]: I'm on my way.

He places his phone on his desk, knowing that Minho would be here in a few minutes and goes to crash onto his bed, sighing once again. 

"Stop with the sulky face. I'm the one who should be sulking and feeling all this guilt." Hyunjin says, Jisung simply looks at him in wonder. 

"What did you do?" 

"I said something so hurtful to him. I compared him to Jeongin." 

Jisung's already large eyes widened, worry growing inside of him immediately. "What did you tell him?" 

"I said that he is fucked up like Jeongin," Hyunjin replies, regret in his voice. Jisung's mouth falls open. Getting compared to Jeongin does sound so fierce, and Minho must be so hurt. "I lost control over myself." 

"Hyunjin, why?" seethed Jisung. "You shouldn't have said that to him, he must be so hurt."

"I'm sorry..." Hyunjin looks down. 

"You shouldn't be sorry to me, you should be sorry to him." Jisung shakes his head frustratedly. He gets off his bed to go back to his phone, but a knock sounded on his door, and Jisung knew who it was. Happy and sad at the same time, he walks over to the door and opens it. There stood Minho, looking so wounded and distressed. 

"Minho..." Jisung softly says his name, not knowing what else to say as his heart was twisting. He tries to pull him into a hug, but Minho beat him to it. 

"Jisung, I'm so sorry for scolding you and hurting your feelings with my stupid anger. I should've known better and understand how you would feel and be affected by my words," Minho says, "I got carried away because Daekhwa is your ex. I dislike him so much, he makes me feel so irritated, and it made me so annoyed to see you two near each other. He even makes me feel insecure and makes me worry that I'd lose you. I don't want him to take you away from me. Now that you and I are together, I want it to be just us two." He explains his feelings thoroughly; Jisung completely understood how he felt and pulls away from him. 

He cups his face with his hands and presses a firm kiss onto his lips, pulling away with a soft smile. "It's okay, Hyung, I was honestly a tiny bit sad because I angered you, but I understand now. I will try my best to stay away from him."

"Sad? I'm so sorry." He looks at Jisung in the eye only for a brief second before he drops his head - looking down at the floor in agony. 

"Minho..." Jisung felt the urge to do something for him, like comforting him. "It's okay." 

Minho's raises his head and looks him in the eye again. "I think I will keep him away from you." 

"Hey, Minho." Hyunjin cuts in. "I apologize for telling you that you are fucked up like Jeongin. I should've thought before saying such a thing to you. You are nothing like him, and now I can see that." 

"Hyunjin." Minho gazes at him now. "It's all good. I know you care a lot about Jisung. I'm glad you are there for him." 

"That doesn't excuse my behavior, you idi-" Hyunjin immediately stops speaking when he realized what he was about to say. 

"What were you going to call me?" Minho raises a brow, Jisung grips onto the older boys hand cautiously. 

"Nothing," Hyunjin awkwardly laughs. 

Minho narrows his eyes at him before he starts chuckling. "I know, I am an idiot. Jisung's idiot." After he says those things, he looks into Jisung's eyes hazily, and Jisung's heart goes wild like how it always does when he was under Minho's intense gaze. Instinctively he leans in close to Minho's face, shuts his eyes, and feels his soft lips press against his. 

"Eww," Hyunjin says in fake-disgust, but was ignored because the couple entered their own world. 

Minho's hands grasp onto Jisung's waist, pulling him closer to his body so that they are pressed up against each other. Jisung was a little embarrassed that they were doing this in front of Hyunjin. Though, at the same time, he didn't care because of the feeling of having Minho against his body, kissing him so aggressively and sloppily was making his mind spin like crazy. 

He eventually does crack his eyes open and sees Minho's lids still closed. He then glances over at Hyunjin's bed, seeing him lying flat on his back with a pillow over his face, protecting himself from the scene before him. 

Jisung couldn't help but smile into the kiss, and a second after, Minho pulls away, smiling at Jisung when he notices that he was smiling. The Brunette raises a brow, and Jisung points over at Hyunjin, making Minho turn his head and see the tall-boy suffering there on the bed and not yet knowing that they were done. 

Jisung wanted to create a scene again and make Hyunjin heavily flustered. 

Minho returns his gaze towards Jisung, and by the look on his face, Jisung could tell that he was trying to suppress his laughter. 

At this rate, they tried to communicate with their facial expressions. Minho looked at Hyunjin and then back at Jisung again, raising a brow, and Jisung assumed that he was asking if they should announce that they were done. His smile spreads, and he shakes his head. 

"Are you guys finished yet?" Hyunjin says, his voice subdued by the pillow.

Minho looks at Jisung seductively, licks his bottom lip before biting down onto it. This struck Jisung, and he could feel his cheeks burning so much. The older boy caresses Jisung's face with his hands and reconnects their lips into another searing kiss. Without parting, Minho pushes him down onto the bed, hovering over his body as his kissing got deeper and gratifying enough to cause Jisung to moan against his lips shamelessly. 

It was all good until something soft was thrown against them, pulling them away from each other. Jisung sits upright so quickly, slight dizziness hitting him before his vision clears. He sees Hyunjin standing there with his arms crossed over his chest, giving the two a judgemental stare. 

"Were you two about to have sex with me here witnessing it?" He complains, "My poor eyes and ears and brain!" 

"No, it was just a kiss," Jisung answers with a slightly embarrassed smile. 

"Just a kiss? You two looked like you were starved for days," Hyunjin scoffs.

"I'm always hungry for some Jisung," Minho boldly speaks.

" _ Minho! _ " Jisung whines, his face heating up again. 

"What? It's the truth." Minho looks at Jisung and smirks. "I'm craving you all day." 

"I love you," Jisung randomly says, to get them out of this situation. Minho's humorous expression fades away, replaced with a softer and relaxed look. 

"I love you too, baby." 

"You two are disgustingly cute," Hyunjin says and then laughs afterward. " _ Very _ disgustingly cute." 

\--------

Training is essential if they wanted to work on their skills to better themselves. It needed to be taken seriously. Unlike Chan and Jisung, Changbin  _ wasn't _ taking it seriously - acting so sluggish and done with everything. Jisung and Chan didn't notice until their dance instructor pointed it out and scolded him. Telling him to stop lazing around and get to work if he wanted to debut with the other two. 

After another hour, they were done with their dance lesson and collapsed by the wall, tired to their bones. Every single part of Jisung was hurting, and he felt like the life was sucked out of his body. Managing trainee life and University life was stressful and tiring, but he couldn't do anything about it. He couldn't just drop out of Univerisity because his parents would be utterly disappointed in him for not pursuing his "engineering major." 

"Let's do well next week when they check in on us. I think we will make it because we are working hard," Chan speaks encouragingly. He is so good with his words, blessing others with his kind-hearted ways. 

"Changbin, you were a little off today. Did something happen today?" Chan asks. Curious, Jisung looks over at the shorter boy. His head was tilted upwards, and for some reason, Changbin was staring at the practice room ceiling, with his legs sprawled out in front of him. He's sitting as still as a rock, unyielding until Chan made his way over to him.

"Changbin, what's wrong? Talk to us." 

Changbin huffs out a breath sadly and squeezes his eyes shut. "Felix. He broke up with me." Even if Jisung wasn't dealing with the emotions Changbin was dealing with right now; it still stabbed through him like freshly sharpened swords. 

"I'm so sorry about that." Chan tries to hug him, but Changbin swatted at his arms, forcing them away. "Tell us what happened, only if you're okay with it." 

"He didn't tell me the reason why." Changbin's bottom lips quivered as he speaks. He bites onto his bottom lip, seemingly trying to prevent himself from breaking down. "He came up to me and told me that he wanted to break up with me. I was so shocked, wondering what I did wrong. I even asked him why, but he didn't reply. He didn't look hurt while saying those words. He didn't even look like himself, and after that, he just walked away. Maybe he grew tired of me." 

Jisung's breath caught in his throat. 

"We haven't been spending any time with each other; maybe that could be the reason why he decided to cut me out." The tears left his eyes. "Or maybe I don't fit his standards-" 

"Stop with that, Changbin. Just fucking stop," Chan scolds softly, but still with irritation. "Just because Felix broke up with you doesn't mean you should say these things about yourself. It would help if you stopped letting unnecessary thoughts kick you." 

Facing a break up is hard. Although Jisung didn't experience a painful breakup, he had seen enough of them in films and some sappy dramas he watches. He even saw it in Hyunjin, who used to feel so much pain and wouldn't stop forgetting about Jeongin. It's hard to let go. It takes so much strength to do so. 

Of course, it'll all be hard on Changbin. 

"I liked him, Chan. He was so nice to me; he was perfect for me." Changbin fingers traveled to his dark strands, and he rubs his scalp. "His laughs, his smiles, they were everything to me." 

"Changbin, nothing's over. I know you love him a lot, if it helps, go talk things out with him." 

\--------

That's what he does the next day. 

"What is it?" Felix says once he notices Changbin by the wall right across from the dance class, Felix just came out of. He was staring at him without any emotions within his eyes, nothing, not even a pinch of sadness. His eyes, his stare it was biting Changbin. 

"I don't understand, Felix." Changbin steps over to him and grabs both of his hands. "Why did you break up with me?" He was desperate for answers, anything to link them back together like they used to. He wanted to spend more time with the warm sun; he needed him. 

"I just did," Felix replies and shrugs like it meant nothing to him, hurting Changbin more in the process. The older boy tried to hold in the tears that were threatening to fall by taking in a breath and calmly letting it out. 

"I need to know the reason I need to understand what I did wrong." 

"You did nothing wrong," Felix replies and rips his hands away from Changbin's grasp. "I don't love you anymore, Changbin. I chated on you." Changbin widened his eyes; those words hit his heart like lightening. He didn't want to believe him; Felix wouldn't cheat on him, would he? "I know you're upset, but think about it; we didn't fit each other well." Another strike, but he wasn't going to let himself fall just like that. 

"We don't need to fit, Felix. Things can work out with our differences. I still love you regardless," Changbin despairingly replies. 

"You." Felix points at Changbin, "Love me." Then he points at himself. "I don't love you, I'm already with someone." He steps back, looking like he wanted to leave. "You deserve someone better than me, someone, who'd treat you better, someone who wouldn't cheat on you as I did." Changbin lets his tears run free, and it sparked something in Felix's eyes, hurt? But Felix quickly turned away and left the shorter boy standing there alone with tears running down his cheeks. 

He wasn't alone for too long, though, because saw Minho approach him, a pitiful look on his face, and he wraps Changbin with his arms, making him cry harder. 

Minho then lets him go. "Let's meet after class. I'm not taking no as an answer. I have to go now; there is something I need to do. Take care, Changbin." He smiles at him warmly, not that it made Changbin feel any warmer and walked away. He watches his back until he doesn't see him anymore and looks down at his shoes. 

\--------

"Why aren't you eating?" Minho asks, gesturing at Changbin's untouched food that was probably beginning to lose its warmness. 

"I have no appetite, I'm too sad," Changbin mutters and rests his chin against his palm, staring at the dishes. They looked so good, but his stomach wasn't agreeing with it because of his emotions. 

"Wow, I can't relate. When I'm sad, my appetite becomes powerful. I eat, eat, eat, and eat until I'm satisfied." Minho smiles and picks up a cheesy egg roll and stuffs it in his mouth. "Mmm. Yum, yum, yum, you should try it too. The food is yummy." 

"I am not a little kid," Changbin states. He felt much more pathetic. 

"You're definitely not acting like one right now," Minho replies sarcastically. "I paid for this, you better eat this all up." Changbin scowls at him. Why did he have to buy the food for him then? Changbin could've paid on his own. He wanted to tell him those things but kept his mouth closed. Minho is so affable for taking him out to eat in an attempt to make Changbin feel better, so he didn't want to snap back at him rudely. Instead, he only opened his mouth to shove in food - it was delicious despite his lack of appetite. 

"So...how are you feeling?" Minho carefully asks, as if his words would break Changbin - it didn't, and he just stares at him, silently judging him for asking an obvious question. His expression and the way he is eating is showing his emotions well. He isn't well. Why would he feel well, especially after what happened between him and Felix? 

"I'm sad." Changbin deadpans. "I'm still in love with him. So much in love with him, even if his actions and his words break my heart." 

"How come you still love him? Didn't he say that he cheated on you?" Minho picks up another cheesy egg and shoves it in his mouth before staring attentively at Changbin as he chews. 

"It's hard for me to explain. But I just do. Felix is so special to me, like how Jisung is to you," Changbin tries to explain, "Even if he did cheat on me, it doesn't change how I feel about him. He means a lot to me." 

Minho sighs and places his chopsticks down, "Felix isn't okay either," and he picks up his bottle of coke and takes a sip. "He is clinging onto guilt; he feels so bad for hurting Jisung and even Hyunjin." 

Changbin purses his lips. "Oh...I see..." 

"Changbin," Minho places his bottle down and picks up his chopsticks again to continue eating, "He wants to die." 

"Wait. What?!" Changbin shrills, widening his eyes in shock - he should've known, and he felt terrible for not knowing about this. 

"I'm guessing that's why he broke up with you and lied to you about cheating. Yes, lied, probably so that the breakup wouldn't hurt you. Apparently, that didn't work. Look at you right now; you look so sad." 

"Did he tell you why he wanted to die?" Changbin asks, worried for Felix's life. He didn't want him to die. It would hurt Changbin so much more than the breakup. There are so many reasons for Felix to be alive, people care about him, loved him, and Changbin doesn't think he will last long if Felix isn't physically here in this world. 

"As I've already said, he feels guilty and thinks he is a horrible person," Minho answers. 

"That doesn't mean death is the solution to it all. Can you drive me to his dorm? I want to talk to him." Minho nods as a reply and quickly tries to finish up his food. Changbin chuckles at Minho's frantic actions. "Oh come on, take your time unless you want to choke." Minho smiles shyly and nods. 

\--------

He reached to Felix's dorm and raised his fist to knock on the door. He was so hesitant about it, afraid that Felix would get mad at him for showing up. He was clearly done with him, emotionlessly leaving him behind earlier today. Changbin curses to himself mentally for being such a wimp and knocks on the door. 

Seungmin was the one that opened the door, and he smiles at Changbin before letting him step inside. "Felix is in the bathroom showering," he says before Changbin could ask. "He'll be out in a few minutes." 

"Felix...since he is your roommate, did you notice anything unusual about him?" Changbin asks. Seungmin looks at him without any looks of uncertainty. 

"He changed. He isn't happy anymore and doesn't talk to me a lot anymore, either. I guess we are busy doing our own things. I study, and he plays videogames on his computer." He gestures over at Felix's desk - that contained his gaming PC, with led equipment - to prove his point. His desk was so captivating and tidy, and Changbin found himself staring at it for a little too long. 

He turns his head back towards Seungmin, who was still waiting there. "Yeah, he doesn't look happy anymore, I've seen it myself. He broke up with me, and Minho told me that Felix wanted to die." 

Seungmin had that same shocked expression like how Changbin did when Minho told him the same thing. "I don't know what to say...just that I'm so hurt to hear that. I know he is much sadder these days, and videogames are his new escape, but I didn't know Felix was sad to the point that he wanted to die-"

The bathroom door opened, silencing Seungmin immediately. They both turned to see Felix stepping out while rubbing his hair dry with a soft-looking white towel. His face is painted with fatigue, and when his eyes lock on Changbin's worried ones, he lets out a sigh, clearly showing how unhappy he was with his presence. 

"Why are you here? Stop chasing after me uselessly and use your time to find someone else who loves you." 

"You were lying to me, Felix. I'm sure you didn't cheat on me; you would never do such a thing!" 

"And how would you know?!" Felix grunts bitterly, his expression hardening like his voice. "I am capable of doing many things. I can break people's trust...and...hurt people like you by cheating. You shouldn't trust a ch-" 

"No! So much is happening inside you! You're battling with guilt, but how long are you going to last by carrying such a massive weight of a...burden?! Till you eventually give up? You can't solve any of that by dying." Changbin refuses to believe Felix's words after what Minho had stated. Maybe Felix is trying to close himself away from the world. Changbin is never going to get out of Felix's skin and will keep a hawk-eye on him. 

"Since when did I say I wanted to die?"

"Since someone told me," Changbin concludes firmly. 

"Minho..." Felix grumbles. 

"Listen up, you two, I know you might be upset with what you've done; I was upset too, but I owned up to my mistakes and apologized to him. Guess what? We are friends again," Changbin admitted in an attempt to give them some hope. 

Felix sits down on his chair, "I understand. I'll stop thinking that way." 

"Do you promise?" Changbin raises a brow. Felix smiles at him and nods. Changbin mirrors the smile, although something in Felix's smile seemed a little off. "That's great to hear. And, about the cheating, is that true?" 

Felix bites onto his bottom lip and shakes his head. "I lied to you, I'm sorry."

"I-Felix, goodness," Changbin rakes back his dark hair with his fingers after Felix confirmed that it was a lie. "Why- no, I mean, do we still have any chance of getting back together? I miss you and am wil-"

Felix spins around in his chair to face his monitor and grabs his headphone beside his shining LED keyboard. "We don't have any chance together, Changbin. I think it's best if we just stay like how we are now. I'm a mess, and you should keep clean."

"I don't-" Felix puts on his headphones, and Changbin's juts his bottom lip into a frustrated pout. Just by those actions, Changbin could tell Felix wanted him to leave and wanted nothing to do with him. He felt like he was hit in his heart; this all felt like it was a nightmare. 

"Changbin, it's okay...I think he needs some time," Seungmin says. As much as it hurt, Changbin nodded his head in agreement and gave the studious boy a sad smile before walking out. 

When he reached Minho's car and got inside, the Brunette asked, "How did it go?" 

Changbin shakes his head as a response, "I don't want to talk about it." 

Minho gives him such a painful look of understanding. "Okay." 

\--------

"Haha, you're too slow," Minho laughs as he wriggles a blue yarn in front Doongie, the cat narrowing its eyes at the fluffy string as if it's its enemy. It swats at the blue strand, but Minho kept it on pulling it back teasingly. Doongie gave up and stared up at Minho. 

"You are so cute~" Minho nears the yarn to the cat, letting it touch the blue line because why not? He wanted to be kind to it after it worked hard and tried to attack the string. It's a reward well deserved. 

He was about to pull the yarn away, but when he heard the familiar sound chime from his phone, he dropped it, enabling Doogie to capture it and play with it. Minho smiles at the cat before picking up the phone beside him and saw an unknown number appear on the screen. Ignoring it was what he felt like doing, desperately wanting to return playing with his cat, but it was the message that froze him and caught his eye. 

Unknown [9:32 PM]: You will pay. 

Pay for what? Minho rolls his eyes at the screen in annoyance and places his phone aside, thinking it was some random person texting him as a joke or texted the wrong number. How annoying. The irritation fades quickly once his eyes landed on his precious cat. He decides to play with it again as it was looking up at him expectantly. He picks up the string and wiggles it in front of his cat. 

"Doo-" His phone cut him off again, and he lets out a long heavy sigh. It was the same fucking number, a way to ruin one's night and playtime with his cat. He drops the yarn  _ again  _ and grabs his phone angrily. 

Unknown [9:33 PM]: I will ruin your life. 

Was he supposed to feel scared? He lets out a light 'tsk.' He wasn't even the slightest bit afraid, just pissed that someone had the damn nerve to text him such a thing. Ruin his life? He'd ruin theirs. He wasn't going to back down on such a severe something like this, but he needs to make sure if this person was texting the right number. 

Minho [9:34 PM]: Cut it out. I think you have the wrong number. 

Not even a minute later, there was a response. 

Unknown [9:34 PM]: If you're Lee Minho, I'm sure I have the right number. 

That response sent chills rapidly down his spine, and he tenses up. Despite those chilly feelings, that didn't stop himself from gnawing on his dry bottom lip and replying. 

Minho [9:35 PM]: Who the fuck are you? 

Unknown [9:36 PM]: Why would I tell you? 

Minho [9:37 PM]: If you know me, then tell me who you are. What's with all this shit? 

Unknown [9:38 PM]: Just wait. 

Minho [9:38 PM]: Wait for what?!

There was no reply afterward, leaving Minho sitting there appalled and still staring at the screen filled with apprehension. Although feeling fear sounds useless for him, he couldn't brush away that feeling. He didn't want to get killed. He threw his phone aside, scaring Doognie away; well, great, Minho was now in his bed alone. 

He couldn't believe someone was after him. And they wanted to ruin his life? Pointless. There is nothing that person could gain from that beside trouble once they are caught for murder. 

"This is insane!" Minho ruffles his hair in frustration and lays flat on his bed. 

\--------

Jisung was hanging out with Minho in his cozy, inviting apartment, one of his favorite places now. He was sitting sideways on Minho's couch - his back pressed against the soft armrest. Resting between his legs was Minho, his back pressed against the younger's chest. This was so comfortable, and leaving this isn't what Jisung wanted; he wanted to stay like this forever, even if it was impossible. 

However, what's not comfortable was the fact that Minho wasn't speaking much. It was so unusual. The air felt so stiff to Jisung, and he wanted to break away with it and try to feel comfortable. He tried to say something, but his words wouldn't come out. How is Minho dealing with this? Or does he not feel the same way? He probably doesn't as he is captivated by his phone. 

When Jisung hears a loud, sad-sounding sigh, that's when he decides to speak. 

"Hyung, is everything okay? You're not talking much." 

"Mm, nothing," Minho softly mutters, his eyes still cemented to his phone. Not satisfied with that answer, Jisung pouts a little and tries to grab Minho's attention by pressing a kiss against his soft brown hair. There was no reaction, but he wasn't planning on giving up yet. He presses feathery kisses against the side of his neck; again, nothing. Then he continued on and tugged the collar of Minho's shirt to the side, exposing his shoulder and presses kisses there, no reaction yet again. 

Jisung gives up, wraps his arms around Minho, and rests his forehead against his shoulder. At last, Minho responds - not entirely - he just removed Jisung's arms from around his waist and shifted so that he was face-to-face with the younger, their faces were so close. Even though they've been this close to each other plenty of times, Jisung's heart still beats crazily against his chest, and he swallows dryly underneath the powerful gaze of Minho's. 

Minho leans near Jisung's cheek, presses a kiss against the skin, and smiles at the younger. "My life's been blessed by an angel." 

"I'm an angel?" Jisung's stomach flipped; he wasn't sure if him being an angel was definite. Minho shouldn't have described him like that because Jisung felt like he wasn't thoroughly pure. "Are you sure about that?" 

"You don't think so?" Minho chuckles. "I think you're an angel. In my eyes, you are an angel shining brightly within my clouds. You make my days brighter when I'm not feeling so bright."

"What's not making you feel that way right now? Tell me what's wrong," Jisung asks, not disregarding the fact that Minho was behaving a little differently moments ago. 

"You probably wouldn't want to hear it, sweetie," Minho frowns. 

"I want to hear it, Minho, that's why I asked. I want to know what is causing you to feel upset like how you are right now." Jisung examines the expression on Minho's face, which is growing duller and sadder. 

"It's best if you don't. I don't want to make you worried. I can solve it on my own, actually. It only involves me, no one else," Minho states. Jisung furrows his eyebrows at him, not liking what he just said. He wants to help him out, make him feel happy, but Minho was locking whatever he was dealing with within his mind. 

"I need to worry about you, Minho," Jisung says softly. "But if you don't want to tell me what's going on, then that's fine; I won't force it out of you." It isn't fine; Jisung only said what he said just to sound understanding. 

Minho opened his mouth to reply, but the sound of his phone cut him off. He picks up his phone and stands up, taking steps away from Jisung as he peered at his phone. Jisung could sense so much negativity coming out of the older boy. 

"Just a text," Minho says, his voice not at all giving off the 'I'm okay' tone. Jisung didn't want to ask anymore, not wanting to pester Minho too much, knowing that he wanted to keep whatever it is, private. Jisung didn't like how Minho was hiding his words. 

The Brunette returns to the couch, sitting beside Jisung, "Don't worry." He presses a kiss on the youngers cheek again, not that it eased him away from his worries, but he forces a smile and rests his head on his shoulder. 

"I'm always here for you," Jisung quietly replies; Minho only kisses him on top of the head as a response. 


	23. Touches of Desire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Smut (at the end of the chapter)

In the morning art class, Minho spent (wasted) his minutes watching Jisung working on his sketchbook. His gaze on the paper was so intense, and Minho shouldn't think this, but he believes a focused Jisung is a sexy Jisung. Watching him is mesmerizing, and Jisung didn't appear to mind it all, or maybe that is because he is more focused on his work. 

Occasionally he would smile as he draws, and so would Minho. 

Minho doesn't do any of the projects in this class; he doesn't have to because he still hadn't enrolled; it was way too late anyway - it's the end of the semester, dead close to finals week. In the beginning, the art professor used to give him weird looks, wondering if he is okay; now, he knows that Minho only comes here for Jisung. 

"I like your progress," Minho compliments. Jisung is improving significantly, and Minho feels so proud of him. At the praise, the younger responded with a cute little smile, and his cheeks started turning into a light red. Minho felt like he was about to melt. Oh, how badly he wanted to kiss that squishy flesh. 

He continues to follow Jisung's pencil and sees how he sketches out his work so diligently. The metallic sound coming from the pencil against the paper was, for some reason, relaxing; like soft piano music, it helped calm him. Minho could stay like this - listening to the scratchy sounds - all day if he could. 

Eventually, the sounds made Minho doze off. 

What seemed like minutes later, he felt something poke him, and he flutters his eyes open, seeing Jisung smiling at him. "Good morning, Minho," Jisung laughs. 

Minho pulls his face off the cold surface of the art table and stares at Jisung. "What did I miss?" 

"Nothing much," Jisung replies. "Just that I am done with the work, it's only a quick sketch. I hope you like it." 

Minho peers at the sketch, and his heart skipped a beat, no two beats! Three! Jisung has the nerve to do this to him, does he? How brave of him. He is so fucking brave for sketching the two of them hugging. It isn't too realistic, but it's good enough to show how much Jisung improved, and he could draw people so much better. He is a hundred times better than Minho with art. 

The sketch displayed a picture of Jisung hugging Minho from behind, and around the work were tiny hearts. So freaking cute. 

"Your next class is Biology, right?" Minho asks out of the blue. Jisung blinks at him, confused. 

"Yeah, the worst, why?" 

"You'll see, baby." 

\--------

What Jisung sees right after his biology class is Minho waiting by the door. When the brunette spots him, he grabs Jisung by the wrist and drags him to somewhere; he didn't ask and just let himself be dragged to wherever Minho yearned to take him. Surprisingly, the place was the bathroom. Once the two stepped in, Minho immediately pushed him against the wall and kissed him. 

"That drawing of yours made me feel so happy. I think I am the luckiest person in the world," Minho says against Jisung's lips, "I'm so lucky to have a nice boyfriend like you. You are special." 

"You're the best, Minho, I love you so much," Jisung replies and gives a quick peck at Minho's lip. "You are perfection; everything about you is perfect, your eyes, your lips, your heart, your existence,  _ everything _ ." 

Minho grips Jisung's waist and draws him closer to his body and kisses him so profoundly. Jisung shuts his eyes and moans against Minho's mouth, and the brunette slips his tongue past Jisung's lips. His tongue tasted so pleasant, and not so bad; he could taste the banana.

Minho reaches his hand underneath Jisung's shirt and touches his skin. The cold feeling from his fingers brought goosebumps all over Jisung; he grabbed Minho's wrist, making him stop and tear away from Jisung's mouth.

"Let's not get too far yet, I'm not ready for this," Jisung says.

"That's okay, sweetie." Minho cups Jisung's cheek and squeezes them. "Love you." 

"Love you too." 

"Let's make your artwork come true, baby," Minho says as he smiles so warmly and ushers Jisung towards the mirror. He stands in front of the younger and takes out his phone. Jisung wrapped his arms around Minho's waist and rested his chin against Minho's shoulder. The brunette took several pictures of them. 

"It doesn't look exactly like your artwork, but I guess this will do; I think we look great." 

Jisung gives him a small laugh. "Yeah. Can you text me the photos?" 

"Okay." 

\--------

Hyunjin contently heads towards where his dance class is. When he reaches close, Hyunjin sees someone he didn't expect to see standing there looking as if he were waiting. Jeongin had nothing to do with dance or performing arts whatsoever. Back when they were together, Hyunjin remembered Jeongin talking about how he aspired to be a pharmacist. Two of the classes he is taking this semester connects to that field of study. 

There is no other reason for Jeongin to be here other than to talk to Hyunjin. 

Without any sorts of hesitation, he walks over to him. Jeongin didn't look happy or sad; his emotion just seemed flat. 

"Hey there," Hyunjin smiles at him, trying to be a bold person. 

"Hyunjin, I missed you so much." Of course, Jeongin gets straight to his point. And he misses him? Sad, Hyunjin believes. Clearly, Jeongin hasn't gotten over him yet, not that Hyunjin was affected by it anymore. He just felt sorry for him for not being able to let go. 

Maybe it does irk him a tiny bit, but it wasn't such a big deal. The feelings of longing hurt, and dejection burned down to ashes and seized to exist. It felt so good now; he felt so free. Though, the only thing that exists is the memories, not that he cared about them anymore. He is over Jeongin. His heart renewed, moving away from the dark whirlpool of feelings. 

"How are you doing, Jeongin?" Hyunjin beams at him genuinely, acting like they never dated, never felt the pain from him, and is now treating him like a friend. Not that he even considered him as a friend. Maybe acquaintance? Or just someone he knows? 

"I'm doing fine, you seem to be doing well as well, you look so happy," Jeongin managed to reply, not smiling like how Hyunjin was. All that was in his eyes were mixtures of confusion and a tiny amount of pain. He is probably wondering if the Hyunjin right in front of him was real or not, and the pain must be from Hyunjin's smile. "I guess you were able to let me go." 

"And I guess you didn't," Hyunjin says and shrugs. Jeongin no longer has a chance with him. "Are you and Sunwoo still together?" That question made something shine in Jeongin's eyes. Was Hope it? 

"No, I broke up with him. I don't feel the same way for him, like how I felt for you. No one can replace you." 

"Awh, well, sorry." There wasn't anything Hyunjin could do about it. He didn't feel any pity for this boy. "It was nice seeing you, Jeongin, I'll get going now. My class is going to start within a few minutes." 

"Wait..." Jeongin says. "You don't feel anything for me anymore, do you?" 

"I moved on." Hyunjin directly concludes and spreads a broad smile on his face. He pats Jeongin's shoulder before brushing past him quickly, not wanting to continue a conversation with him. He knows that all Jeongin is going to do is try to plead with him or throw many more questions at him. 

He didn't want any of that. 

Because he fell in love with someone else. 

"Hello, Jinyoung Hyung!" Hyunjin smiles and bows. 

Yeah, his dance teacher. 

"Hi, Hyunjin-ah," Jinyoung greets back with the same big smile as Hyunjin's, and happiness was shimmering in his coffee-colored eyes. "You seem happy today, very happy. Did you eat something nice, or did something good happen to you? Usually, at the time near finals, a lot of students look so lifeless, but for some reason, you don't." 

"Is it a crime to be happy?" Hyunjin playfully pouts and places his hands on his hips. "I'm always happy to see you~." 

"I guess I have that effect on you," Jinyoung winks playfully. "Now, go stretch Hyunjin-ah." He shoo's him away. 

Hyunjin walked over to an unoccupied spot and sat down. He stretches out his long legs first and then turns his head curiously at Felix, accompanied by Minho. Minho notices him staring and smiles at him before speaking to Felix again. 

Hyunjin misses Felix. He misses being with such an ex-enthusiastic boy who lit Hyunjins day up with a blissful smile. It's been so long, yes, Felix made a stupid mistake, yes, mistakes happen, of course. Hyunjin's heartaches whenever he sees Felix looking like he is washing by icy-cold water. And he misses dancing with him and talking to him. 

Reluctantly, Hyunjin stands up because something inside of him was telling him to speak to Felix. Felix didn't do much to Hyunjin than he did to Jisung, and Hyunjin wanted to forgive him and not be mad at him anymore, but he couldn't. He stood still in place. He didn't know  _ how _ to talk to Felix. Would it be awkward? It's been so long since they talked. Hyunjin felt tremendously pathetic. 

He needed some time to accumulate words and properly talk to him without any awkwardness. So instead, he looks away from him and starts stretching out his arms. 

Right after class, Hyunjin approached his dance teacher with an intention. An intention to talk to him about something. "Jinyoung Hyung." He says in a kind of cutesy tone, it was cringy. He already felt the embarrassment claw at his skin; he regretted it. 

"Hey," Jinyoung smiles, at least he wasn't cringing. He seemed thrilled to see Hyunjin right in front of him. Hyunjin hoped that it was a hint that his teacher liked him back, but his hopes were considerably high-priced. He always has such absurd wishes. "Did you need to ask me something?" 

"I..." Hyunjins voice is enclosed within his throat. His insecurities infected his mind, and he didn't know how to say what he desperately wanted to say. The feelings he developed for his charming dance teacher made him feel so antsy on the inside. If he tells him, would Jinyoung get uncomfortable? It may be considered wrong to like a teacher that way, especially since Hyunjin is a freshman at this University. Nah, he shouldn't tell him. 

He started thinking about what to say, instead of letting his true feelings out of his chest. He shouldn't risk anything by telling the truth. 

"It's okay, tell me," Jinyoung says calmly, he noticed Hyunjin's discomfort. 

"I have a question about the final. Do I have to create my own choreography?" 

Jinyoung sighed. "I discussed this last week, did you really forget?" Hyunjin knew the answer to his own question. He wasn't  _ that _ forgetful. His brain just couldn't process any better things to say to Jinyoung. 

"Yeah, I'm sorry," he lies and drops his head in shame, only to have the teacher set his hand on the top of his head. It's supposed to be a comforting gesture, it really was, but Hyunjin's heart rebelled and started speeding up. 

"It's okay, it's okay," Jinyoung reassures, "For the final, you do have to create your own choreography. You can choose to do it with a partner or alone; it doesn't matter. The grade will depend on not only your skill but also your creativity." 

"Thanks, Hyung," Hyunjin forces a smile and looks at him. 

Jinyoung retracts his hand from Hyunjin's head. "No problem, I'm glad you asked."

Hyunjin bows and turns for the door; just as he was about to open it, Jinyoung speaks. "You looked like you had something else to say."

"No, it's nothing," Hyunjin sighs and leaves the dance practice room. He failed himself. 

\--------

"Save me, Hyung, please save me from this nightmare," Jisung wails and slaps his biology textbook out of frustration. He's studying for his finals - well, not precisely studying; he only learned a few things and gave up afterward. He regretted this choice of a general ed class; he wished he chose flexible options like geology. The only courses that went by with ease were his heath and music production class. He learned his lesson, though, and for the fall semester, he will choose courses that fit his standards and ask his second-year friends for help. 

"Save me from my nightmare too, Jisung-ah," Hyunjin sighs, "I'm dealing with a big problem, ugh! I don't have the guts to confess!" 

Bewildered, Jisung rose from his seat and looked over at Hyunjin, who was fiddling with his pencil nervously, not yet studying. "You have feelings for someone? Who is it? How come you didn't tell me?" 

"I don't know...you won't judge, will you?" Hyunjin asks, looking so worried. 

"Of course not!" Jisung says and confirms it with an assuring smile.

"I fell in love with my handsome dance teacher," Hyunjin reveals. Jisung widened his eyes in shock; he didn't think Hyunjin would fall in love with his own dance teacher, not that he was against it in any way. 

"Since when?" 

"Since the day Jinyoung saved me from Jeongin." Hyunjin rolls his eyes. "That day, Jeongin was pestering me, and he was so mad at me, but Jinyoung helped me get away from him." 

"Jeongin is such a leech," Jisung sighs out of annoyment. 

"You got that right," Hyunjin sighs as well. 

"And now you are in love with your savior dance teacher after that day, huh? How cute. I've seen Jinyoung a couple of times, and honestly, I think he is super handsome, wise, and sometimes nice." 

"Sometimes?" Hyunjin raises a brow and laughs. "Well, you're not entirely wrong, as a teacher, he is strict, but he is very understanding and nice and has such a heavenly smile." 

" _ Ah _ . Tell me why it is so hard for you to confess to your dance teacher." 

"I just think that there will be a high chance that Jinyoung Hyung will reject me because you know, I'm his damn student, and I don't think he'd want to date a student." 

"Take a shot before you say there is no chance, who knows how things turn out afterward. Maybe you and Jinyoung Hyung will end up together. And I hope you do." 

"Thanks..."

"By any chance, are you forcing yourself to like someone else just to get over Jeongin?"

"I'm already over him, my mind flushed him out, and I don't feel so gloomy whenever I see him," Hyunjin says happily.

"Ah...okay, that's good," Jisung replies, "Anyway, since we have the same math class do you want to review together? I'm having a hard time with it again."

"Yeah! I'd love to," Hyunjin says, "I hate math but working with you is so much fun." 

\--------

Jisung stood up, placed his things in his backpack, and headed towards the bathroom. Minho told him to meet him there. Jisung didn't know why Minho wanted to meet him in the bathroom; it was kind of an odd place for them to meet, but he wouldn't question it. 

When he enters the bathroom, he spots the brunette standing in front of one of the cubicles, sweat was dripping down from his face, and he is clinging onto his sports bag. He had just come from his dance class. From several inches away, Jisung could smell the mixture of Minho's sweat and the crisp minty smell of his perfume. He must have sprayed it on himself to mask that sweaty smell. Jisung didn't mind the scent at all; he liked how it smelled so Minho. 

Minho walks over to him, grabbed him by the wrist, and nears his lips to Jisung's ear, his voice coming out very breathy. "Remember that..." he pauses, "Haah...goodness, sorry I'm so tired...but do you remember that one mystery you had of me?" 

Mystery? Jisung didn't remember, so he shook his head. 

"Awh, well, I'll help you remember," he pants out. It causes Jisung's face to heat because he was thinking a little too lewdly. Minho wasn't huffing like that on purpose; he was out of breath from dancing and could barely speak. 

When he is pulled into the stall, Minho locks the door. "Those two times you heard me, I wasn't doing what you were thinking."  _ Oh _ , so _ that _ is what he was talking about! Jisung felt so embarrassed by that memory. 

"I come here to change." Minho kneels and unzips his sports bag in search of his fresh pair of clothing. "In case you may be wondering why I don't change in the dressing rooms, that is because it feels so stuffy in there. Almost everyone is sweaty, and I can't survive in there. I wonder how Felix and Hyunjin do it." 

He takes off his sweat-soaked beige colored shirt and puts it into his bag. Jisung's eyes landed on Minho's stomach, and he immediately smiles. 

"That day, I think it was the first day of uni, you called me a wuss." Jisung laughs. "And another time in literature class, you passed me a note telling me that I take steroids for my abs. Why did you say that when..." Jisung points at Minho's stomach, "You don't have abs yourself?" 

"It's one pack!" Minho stands up, clearly looking abashed. He was holding onto his shirt; he hadn't put it on yet. It's Jisung's first time seeing Minho's pale skin that's always concealed beneath his shirt. Honestly, it looked so lovely. 

"Are you still hurt over that day?" Minho asks. 

Jisung gazes at Minho, realizing that he was gawking at Minho's stomach for too long. "Minho, I'm over it. I've already forgiven you. I'm so happy and blessed that we came this far with each other. Even if things weren't so good between us initially, you still proved how much you care about me and others. I love you."

"I love you too, sweetie. I'm still sorry over those days. I used to take pleasure from your pain and liked seeing you get hurt from me. I was so stupid and stuck up towards you. It was all because I wanted to stop those feelings I had for you. Now the only thing I take pleasure from is your existence and your sweetness towards me." Minho's draws his lips to Jisung's, kissing him passionately. Jisung presses his hands against Minho's sweaty and slightly sticky back.

Heat sparked within Jisung's groin as he heard Minho moan, the sound so ravishing against his ears. Minho steps back and lands onto the toilet seat; Jisung placed himself on Minho's lap and kissed him from his jaw down to his neck. He parts away from the soft skin and pokes Minho's stomach softly. "I love your stomach; it's so cute."

"I might begin working out and get abs for myself too," Minho chuckles. 

Jisung purses his lips. "Okay. But I like your stomach the way it is, you don't have to change a thing." He presses both of his hands onto Minho's chest and drags them down until they were resting at Minho's stomach, the flesh so soft against his palms; Minho softly lets out a breath from that touch. "Your stomach feels so nice, and it is so soft." 

"Working out and getting abs will boost my confidence. You have abs, and I don't." 

"Minho, I love you no matter what, but if you really want abs, then that's okay. It is your choice." Jisung kisses Minho on the tip of his nose before his lip lands on Minho's plump ones. He kisses him so intensely, his tongue making its way into Minho's mouth, their kiss went from being so keen to sloppy. Saliva made it's way out of his mouth along with Minho's.

It was so addicting, and Jisung didn't want to pull away just yet. One hand was at the small of Minho's back while the other made it's way to Minho's crotch. He wanted to go this far now. He needed to. 

When Jisung squeezes at the bulge, the brunette moans, but much to his sadness, his action caused Minho to leave Jisung's lips. Minho wrapped his arms around Jisung's waist loosely. "Jisung, are you sure? Do you feel like you're ready for it?"

"If you're fine with it..." Jisung replies, "Does it hurt?" 

Minho's face contorts to a look of disbelief. "What do you mean? You didn't have sex with someone before?" No, Jisung hasn't done it before, never. Previously he was too nervous about doing it, but now he is okay with it, just as long as it isn't too painful. He is comfortable doing it with Minho, knowing that he'd take care of him well. He wants Minho to be the first person to take his virginity. 

"No, I haven't," Jisung says, "It will be my first time.

Minho smiles so brightly. "No wonder why you were shy about it yesterday. Cute." 

Jisung brushes his thumb against Minho's nipple. "Then let's get star-"

"Not so fast, Jisung." Minho laughs. "Let's have sex somewhere comfortable. You don't want your first time to be in a school's icky bathroom, now do you?"

Jisung thinks about it before shaking his head. "No."

"I don't think I can last right now," Minho admits, "I don't have class after lunch, but I know you do, Music production. Is there anything important for you to do in that class?" 

"No, we are going to review our final work with our groups. I'll send the track to Chan and Changbin tonight for them to analyze." 

"Okay." Minho smiles and kisses him. "Now, let's go to my place and have some fun." 

Jisung gets off of Minho's lap, and the other boy grabs his shirt and tugs it on. Then he looks at Jisung with a flushed face. "Um, just a heads up, I'm going to change into different sweats and boxers, are you okay with that? You can step out if you want." 

Jisung blushes as well. "I'll stay here...?" 

Minho reaches into his bag again and pulls out his sweats. Jisung turns around, giving him a little privacy, even though they will most likely see each other naked a little later anyway. When Minho was done, they left the bathroom, exited the uni building, and got inside Minho's nice looking car. 

\-------

The drive back to his apartment was so troublesome. He was growing much more impatient the whole entire time he was driving and wanted to pull over or park somewhere and just have sex with him in the car. He tried his best to hold that stupid urge; Jisung mattered to him more than his eager dick that was throbbing impatiently against the fabric of his boxers. He wanted to make Jisung comfortable as much as he can.

Once Minho closed the door to his apartment, he turned to Jisung and locked his lips onto his. One hand reached behind Jisung's neck, and the other rested onto the middle of his back, pressing him close to his body. 

"You're so fucking hot, Jisung," Minho says, his breath shallower, and he pulls off the younger boy's shirt, flinging it aside. His hands smoothed over Jisung's warm waist, and he pressed his lips onto his shoulder, sucking on it, instantly feeling the blue-haired boy shiver and let out a gasp. 

"M-Minho, not in front of your cats," Jisung mutters out. 

"Hm?" He pulls away quickly and looks over at the couch. Soonie thankfully was fast asleep. Dori was concentrated on her favorite toy, and Doongie was just lying there, not just lying there. It was looking right at the two with curious eyes. 

"You're right, I'm such a dummy." Minho giggles and drags Jisung to his bedroom, closing the door after him. They stumbled over to his bed; Minho pushed Jisung down and crept above him, instantly attacking his neck. He sucks onto the skin, making sure to leave a prominent mark because Jisung belonged to him and only him. 

After about a few quick seconds, he drew away and cherished the reddening patch. "You are mine, and only mine, Jisung. Understood?"

"Y-Yes, Minho," Jisung pants out, "All yours. I want you to eat me up, make me feel good." 

Smiling in satisfaction by Jisung's words, he moves to press kisses up the younger's jaw, and then his lips halt near his earlobe. He takes the soft flesh within his teeth and starts sucking on it; Jisung lets out a pleased moan. 

"Minho...you're so good with your mouth, always making me feel so good." Minho moves his fingers through Jisung's hair and abandons his ear to kiss him on the lips. 

"Only good for you, baby," Minho replies when he pulls away. "You're so cute when you are shy by my touches." When he reaches Jisung's brown lust-filled eyes, the younger's adorable cheeks turn red instantly. He turns his head away, making Minho chortle. "Don't shy away from me." He presses a kiss onto his neck. 

"Okay..." Jisung turns to look at Minho again, who sinks down, capturing his lips into another simmering kiss. As they kissed hungrily, Minho thinks about what to do next. He wants to try his hardest to provide him with the best and most pleasant experience ever. What could make Jisung feel good? Minho knows one thing, Jisung loves being kissed by him, especially when it comes to being kissed around his body. 

Maybe he could tease him a little? That sounded like a great idea, or so he thinks. He'd have to see how Jisung reacts to it.

Minho moves down to his chest, his lips ghosting over the skin, causing the younger to shiver right beneath him. He started pressing kisses against the center of Jisung's chest.

"Ah...feels so good." Jisung moans and set his hands onto Minho's hips, his fingers jabbing in. Minho felt a slight tinge of pain in that area, but he didn't mind it much as he was more absorbed into kissing Jisung's skin, wanting to hear more of his beautiful moans. His moans were so encouraging, and it ensured Minho that he was doing well. 

He moved down and pressed a kiss against Jisung stomach and trailed his tongue down his abs and stopped right before the waistband of Jisung's jeans. He saw how hard Jisung was as it was  _ very _ apparent against his tight jeans.

"What does Jisungie want Minho to do?" Minho asks as he teasingly squeezes Jisung's dick, making him let out a gasp. 

"Touch it more." Minho pulled down the zip and pulled off the irritating skinny jean, throwing it aside, leaving Jisung only in his plain dark red boxers. 

He grips Jisung's thighs and leans down to press an open-mouthed kiss against his hot bulge. He presses another kiss and another until Jisung arches his back impatiently, his head lolling back. Only then does Minho gently nudge him down, pull down the red fabric and discard it. Revealing Jisung's hard, leaking dick that finally sprang free from the torture of being enclosed in the material. 

"Pretty..." Minho murmurs out, pressing his pointer finger against the tip to collect a small amount pre-cum. He draws pointer finger to his mouth and licks off the seeds. Jisung furrows his brows and turns his head to the side, trying his best to hide his impatience, but Minho caught it. 

Minho knows he is going agonizingly slow. He wants to move faster. He would love to, but taking it slow sounded fine, mostly because he wishes for Jisung to be as comfortable as possible. 

"Minho, how long are you going to stare at me?" Jisung says, pulling Minho from his thoughts. He peers at him, seeing how cutely he was pouting. 

"I could stare at you all day, baby," Minho replies with a smirk, gets off the bed and grabs both of Jisung's thighs, giving them a squeeze before he drags him down towards the edge of the bed. He then lets go of the flesh and bent down to press kisses onto the delicate skin, making Jisung's legs quiver. 

Minho licks one last final strip before he moves onto his dick. He grabs the top of Jisung's length and presses kisses onto the underside, causing Jisung to let out a high-pitched moan. 

"Does it feel good?" 

"Ahhh...Minho...oh god...yes...it feels so so good." 

Minho takes the dick into his mouth, teasing the head by swirling his tongue against it, and then in one swift motion, he engulfs him. Jisung gasps at this sudden action, his hand threading into Minho's brown hair, grabbing tightly onto the strands, making Minho even harder if that's possible. 

He tries to suck him off well, the moans assuring him that he was doing good enough. 

Suddenly, Jisung bucks his hip up, making Minho gag. He removed himself from Jisung dick and dropped onto the floor, breaking out into painful coughs. He might have been going a little too slow-paced for Jisung's liking. He wanted to savor that moment well, but couldn't now as he was dealing with a coughing fit. 

"I'm so sorry!" Jisung stands up quickly and kneels onto the floor beside Minho. Minho wiped away the tears that settled in his eyes, and he tried to breathe in and out deeply. Finally, his coughing calmed. 

"It's okay, Jisung," he replies, his voice strained. "I'm good." He stands up and outstretches his hand for the younger who happily grabbed it. Minho helped him up and pushed him gently onto the bed again. 

"Minho, you're still fully clothed. Can you take off your clothes too?" Minho nods and quickly strips himself from his clothes. He looks back at Jisung; he is sitting upright, his eyes wide in what seemed like fear. 

"Are you okay?" Minho asks and steps towards him, placing his hand onto Jisung's bare shoulder. 

"J-Just scared. How are you going to fit inside of me?" Jisung asks, and Minho chuckles softly and presses a kiss against his forehead. 

"I will not hurt you, baby. I'll be gentle with you, and you can tell me when to stop, yeah?" 

Jisung bites his lip and nods. "Okay." 

Again, Minho pushes him down onto the mattress and hovers above him. He presses one final kiss against his lips and pulls back with a smile, gazing over at Jisung with full-on love. He caresses his cheek, "Remember, tell me when to stop, alright?" 

"Mhm." 

Minho gets off the mattress, grasps his bottle of lube from his nightstand, and coats his length with it, applying as much as possible. He then approaches the younger, pulls apart his thighs, and settles between them, positioning the head against his hole. 

He didn't start yet and gazed at Jisung attentively, trying to see how he is feeling. Minho did tell Jisung to tell him to stop, yet he couldn't bring himself to shove himself into the younger, not wanting poor Jisung to be in pain. 

"Minho, you can put it inside me, I'll be okay," Jisung states. Minho complies and slowly enters the younger without ripping his gaze away from his face. He saw how Jisung was biting onto his bottom lip with so much force, looking pained. 

"Do you want me to stop?"

"N-No, I'm okay." 

Jisung desperately pats around and then grabs ahold of the sheets beneath him tightly and whimpers. 

"Baby, will it help if you could hold onto me?" Minho asks, stopping his motions. 

"H-How?" 

Minho pulls out to him and leaves the bed. "Stand up." Jisung does as he is told, and Minho sits down on the mattress. "Okay, now get on my lap." The younger complies and sits on Minho's lap, his bare ass touching Minho's bare thighs. Minho held in his groan, grabs Jisung's hips, and settles him over his dick. "Try going down, take your time, you don't need to rush it." 

Jisung hesitantly slides down into Minho's length, his virginity now gone. Minho wanted to laugh at Daekhwa's lie; that arrogant bastard didn't even get this far. His lies are the only thing keeping him up on his feet. 

Minho couldn't help but feel so gratified to be the one kissing and touching Jisung. He is happy to be the first person Jisung ever had sex with. He will make sure Daekhwa's dirty hands don't encounter Jisung, and if he does, he will pay. 

"A-Ah, you're so tight," Minho groans out, loving how tight Jisung was as he went down his slick length, clenching around it. The younger's moans of pain were replaced with whines of pleasure. Seeing that he appeared to be getting the hang of it, Minho swapped their positions - Jisung on all fours on the mattress with Minho standing behind him. He thrusts into him at a quicker pace. 

"Min- Minho! Ahhh! It feels so good," Jisung moans. 

"I'm glad to see it is getting better for you," Minho says with a smile, and slides his hand onto Jisung's dick, wrapping his fingers around it, pumping the length in unison with his thrusts. 

He moves his hips faster, pounding into him at his point and groaning. He feels himself growing closer and closer with each thrust; his legs were growing weaker. 

Jisung cries, and his cum spurts onto the sheets beneath him. One last deep thrust, Minho comes inside of him and sighs afterward. Jisung sighs out of tiredness and lands flat onto the sheets. His back was so sweaty, and he was breathing heavily like how Minho was. The older boy pressed a kiss onto his back, before grabbing the younger by his waist and turned him over. Minho lays down next to him; his body turned to Jisung. 

"That was so amazing. You are amazing," Jisung twists his head to Minho, beaming at him. That compliment sparked Minho's happiness. 

"No, you are, sweetie," Minho replies. 

Jisung nears himself close to Minho, their chests and stomach touching. "I love you." 

"I love you too," Minho replies, "By the way, I have a lot of things I want to do with you." 

"Tell me."

"I want to go to places with you, basically travel with you, and create memories. I want to take so many pictures and put them into a photo book so that we can look back at it together." Minho's smile grows as he sees the twinkle of excitement within Jisung's eyes. "Is there something you want to do with me too?"

"Cook with you," Jisung giggles, "You're such a great cook, and I want to learn from you."

Minho slings an arm over Jisung's torso. "Let's make it happen." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you liked this chapter! It's another sweet one. The next chapter is going to be very long and very happy - all happy-filled because it's going to be the last happy chapter as of now. The chapter after that, everything just falls :( I feel so sad already


	24. Sweet like Candy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another late update, I'm sorry again! ><
> 
> This chapter ending up being pretty long, and I decided to end it at 8k words. It's mostly 8k words worth of cringe and a lot of happiness (although a few parts will be a tiny bit sad, things resolve quickly though! :D) 
> 
> I hope you enjoy this cringe chapter that I quickly edited ^^; Sorry for any mistakes.

"Jisung, wake up!" Hyunjin shouts and smacks Jisung in the butt. Not a safe area to hit him, Jisung is sore there, and the pain doubled upon the impact from Hyunjin's hand. Jisung turns around so that he is lying on his back, and he looks up at Hyunjin with irritation. 

Then he starts whining, "You shouldn't have hit me there! It hurts like hell, and you made it hurt like a hundred times more. I don't think I can walk anymore, or even move." 

"Oh, yes, you can." Hyunjin finds Jisung's wrist from underneath the comforter and grabs it, and in one swift/strong motion, he pulls him out of bed, making Jisung let out a cry. 

"Don't be aggressive on me, I'm so fragile right now! It hurts so much!" Jisung winces and rubs his lower back. "Even my back hurts." 

"Why does it even hurt?" Hyunjin asks. 

"Yesterday, I skipped class, and Minho took me to his apartment, we kissed and we- yeah..." He doesn't state it and instead hopes Hyunjin would understand. With that surprised look on Hyunjin's face, Jisung presumes that Hyunjin understood - he looks like he understood  _ pretty _ well. 

Then Hyunjin gasps and presses his hands against his head. The original 'o' on his lips quickly turns into a huge grin. "You and Minho fucked?! That's why you're hurting there! I should've known once you whined about your pain." He removes his hands from his head to grasp Jisung's shoulder, and he shakes him back and forth, making Jisung feel a tiny bit queasy. "I'm so happy for you! Did you like it?" 

_ Did you like it? _ Why would he ask that? Jisung chooses to answer his question anyway, "Umm, it was painful at first, but it felt better afterward. Minho was gentle with me..." Jisung wanted to ask Hyunjin if he experienced the same thing and the same pain, but he left that in his mind, thinking it is better to not ask. 

"Wow, Minho treats you like glass," Hyunjin comments and sets Jisung's shoulders free. "I'm so proud that the two of you got this far with each other. Based on how you two treat each other and how you two look at each other, you two will last for eternity." Jisung felt the same way; he falls deeper in love with Minho by each second. 

He would reply and tell Hyunjin how thoughtful and sweet he is being, but the knock on the door lures him out of it. Hyunjin rushes to get the door, and when he opens it, Jisung's blushes when he sees Minho stepping in with a big smile on his face. Missing him - although he saw him yesterday- he walks over to him, even with the pain in his ass, and wraps his arms around him. 

Minho turns his head a little to press a kiss at the side of Jisung's head. "Good morning, baby." 

Jisung smiles parted from him and lightly kisses him on the cheek. "What brings you here at this time?" 

"To check up on you," Minho replies and rests one hand on Jisung's hip while the other is at the low of his back, rubbing at it. Although it isn't easing Jisung's pain, he felt comfortable. "Does it hurt?" Jisung could hear Hyunjin snickering, and he looks past Minho's shoulder and shoots Hyunjin a quick glare before setting his gaze on Minho again.

"I'm okay." 

"No, he is lying. He had a hard time getting out of bed because of the pain. He cried so much because it hurt so much," Hyunjin exposes, and Jisung shoots him another glare.

Minho cups Jisung's face and turns his head back towards him. "Is that true? Does it hurt a lot?" 

Jisung hesitantly nods. "It hurts, but I didn't cry. Hyunjin made that part up. He likes telling fairy-tales." 

"No, I don't!"

Minho softly laughs and removes his hands from Jisung's cheek. It took a lot of effort for Jisung to not pout at that sad loss. He likes it when Minho touches him. It makes him feel so elated and appeased. 

"You did! You were like,  _ 'I'm so fragile right now! It hurts so much!' _ ," Hyunjin mocks Jisung's whines and sticks out his tongue to further irritate Jisung, who forces out his bottom lip into an angry pout. He tries making his way over to the older boy, but Minho is quick to grab Jisung's wrist and pull him back, his back colliding with Minho's chest. 

"Hyunjin, don't be so mean and don't make fun of him, it's not so nice," Minho scolds, his voice having the enraged edge to it. Jisung glances at Hyunjin and saw how guilty and apologetic he looks. 

"I'm sorry," Hyunjin apologizes. 

"Hyunjin, it's okay, and Minho, don't be angry at him. Hyunjin and I joke around and tease each other a lot," Jisung explains. 

"Ooh, okay," Minho replies, and rests his chin onto Jisung's shoulder, "But why were you trying to go over to him?"

Jisung laughs. "I was planning on tackling him to the ground." 

Hyunjin playfully glares, "Tackle me to the ground? You can't do that, I'm taller and stronger. Now, let's get to campus already, I'm starving." 

"I haven't even dressed," Jisung whines, "Give me a few minutes." 

He heads over to his closet and quickly grabs some clothes. He wanted to wear something nice today, but he didn't want to spend so much time looking for a nice outfit and make Minho and Hyunjin wait. He pulls off his plain white shirt and replaces it with a white and black striped shirt. Then, mindlessly he tucks in his thumbs into his sweats to pull them off, but he halts once Minho rushes to him. 

"What are you doing?" Minho hisses and grabs his arm. 

"Changing," Jisung replies. "Why? What's wrong?" 

"What's wrong? You're changing in front of Hyunjin! Do you want him to see you naked?" He glares into Jisung's eyes, and Jisung could feel himself shrink. 

"We often change in front of each other since we are very close. It's nothing new, Minho," Hyunjin defends Jisung, his voice coated with anger directed towards Minho. 

"Yeah," Jisung softly agrees. 

"Not anymore," Minho points at the door to the bathroom, "Change in there, no one can see your lower half beside me." Jisung blushes, and he nods before heading inside the bathroom. He moves down his sweats, and halfway down, the door opens, and he turns his head to the side, seeing Minho step inside and swiftly close the door behind him. 

"And what are you doing here? I'm trying to change, you see." Jisung pulls his sweats back up. Minho leans back against the door. 

"Then go ahead," he replies with a silly smile and gestures towards the jean Jisung placed onto the sink counter. 

"But-"

"Are you going to take off your sweats or not? You're wasting a lot of time, and Hyunjin is waiting patiently outside." 

"You can wait patiently outside with him too," Jisung retorts, and Minho sighs. 

"Come on, it's unfair. Hyunjin probably saw you changing often. Don't I deserve the fair share, especially since I am your boyfriend? You need to make it up to me. Man, I'm so jealous of Hyunjin; you two are always together, and here I am, how many miles away from your dorm?" Minho presses his pointer finger right underneath his chin, showing that he is thinking. "Three, four?" 

"Okay, okay," Jisung whines, "You can stay here." He turns around, removes his sweat so fast like lightning, and then when he reaches for his jeans, he felt embarrassment flash in him all of a sudden - Jisung could feel Minho's stare boring toward his butt that is concealed by his boxers.

"How much does it hurt?" Minho suddenly asks. 

Jisung stays silent until he put on his jeans. "It hurts whenever I move. Don't worry about it too much, it's not as bad as being sore after a heavy workout."

"Ahh, understandable." Minho smiles. "Tell me if you need any help, I can carry you around if you'd like. Or even kiss your butt better." 

"I'd rather have none of those two," Jisung laughs and loops his arms around Minho, "Thank you for the concern, though. Now let's go." 

They leave the bathroom together, and Jisung sees Hyunjin standing by the door, staring at the two with a big smile on his face. He probably heard what happened, but thankfully he doesn't ask and opens the door for the two. The three take the elevator to the main floor and leave the building. 

"Are you guys going to walk to campus?" Minho asks. 

"Yeah. Walking there in the early morning feels nice, plus the campus isn't even that far away from us, it's almost about a ten-fifteen minute walk, not too bad," Hyunjin replies, and glances at Jisung, "Jisung is having a hard time." 

"I am not. It's just painful, nothing too severe. I can endure it," Jisung replies. Minho steps to him and swoops him up off his feet so that he's carrying him bridal style. 

"I knew you'd be in so much pain after yesterday. Another reason why I came over to your dorm was to ask if you two would like me to drive you to school," Minho informs. 

"That would be nice," Jisung replies. 

The two follow after Minho and get inside his car. At first, Jisung was going to sit in the back with Hyunjin, but Minho gave him a pouty look as if he were begging Jisung to sit in the front with him. The pout worked, and Jisung ended up sitting in the passenger seat, making Minho smile in triumph. 

"Your car is so nice!" Hyunjin comments. 

"Thank you," Minho replies, then turns on the engine and puts the car into the reverse mode to back out of the parking slot. "My mom bought it for me as a birthday present last year." 

"Aww, that's so sweet," Hyunjin coos. 

Once at the campus, they head inside the cafeteria, order their breakfast and sit down at an unoccupied table. Jisung immediately dips his spoon into his yogurt and scoops it up and puts it in his mouth. He smiles at the sweet taste and shoves his spoon into the cup again. 

"Have you finished choreographing for the dance final?" Hyunjin asks Minho. The brunette takes a bite of his chocolate glazed donut and nods as a reply. "I can't wait to see your dance. I know it is going to be so cool since you're like the best in the class." 

"I'm not the best. I think I need to improve," Minho replies. Jisung's seen Minho dance a few times, and actually, he is pretty skilled. Even his Mom described how Minho had so many awards for dancing, and that proves how talented Minho is as he has years' worth of experience. 

"You're very humble," Hyunjin sighs. 

Minho turns to Jisung and nears the donut to Jisung's lips, "Want a bite?" Jisung takes a bite and smiles at him gratefully. Minho then turns to Hyunjin. "I know I am humble. But you're good at dancing in your own way, you're so smooth with your moves and show confidence. Felix shows his enthusiasm for dance, making him excellent in his own way as well. I can't wait to see both of you perform your final." 

"I hope Jinyoung Hyung will like it," Hyunjin murmurs. Jisung tries not to smile at him knowingly and pulls on a poker-face.

"If it's you, then he will surely love it," Minho snickers. Jisung gives Minho a pondering gaze, and Minho only replies with a grin. 

"What do you mean if it's me, then he'll like it?" Hyunjin questions, his gaze burning onto Minho, desperately wanting answers. 

"It's nothing," Minho answers. 

Hyunjin looks like he wants to say more things; he even opens his mouth to speak; however, instead of letting out his feelings, he let out a breath. Jisung stares at him for a few seconds, waiting for Hyunjin to say what he desired to say, but those few seconds are only filled with silence, so Jisung gives up his gaze and drops it to his tray. 

"He seems to like you a lot, Hyunjin. I think you might be his favorite student, if he even has favorites," Minho finally answers, making Hyunijn perk up. 

"Nonsense, if he has favorites, then it is obviously you, Minho. You're the-"

" _ Best in the class _ . Don't say that," Minho cuts him off, finishing Hyunjin's sentence for him. Hyunjin slumps his shoulders in oppression. "Jinyoung likes you a lot, he's so different around you, so much nicer to you than he is to others." 

"Oh." Hyunjin seems to smile in relief or in hope. Or maybe both. "Are you sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure!" 

"Thanks for telling me about that. I don't pay attention that much, but now I will," Hyunjin laughs. Minho softly chuckles and returns to finishing up his donut.

"Goodluck, Hyunjin." Jisung smiles at him.

"Thanks, I need it," Hyunjin replies and lets out a light laugh. 

\--------

"Yeaaah! Summer vacation!" Jisung cheers once he bursts into their dorm. Hyunjin happily leaps out of his bed and strides over to Jisung and does a happy dance right in front of him. 

"Fuck yeah! I'm so fucking glad we finished our finals! Now we have two months' worth of freedom before we suffer again!" Hyunjin laughs. 

"Don't remind me of the suffering! I don't want to think about it right now," Jisung dramatically put his hand over his heart and fake-grimaces. "I think we endured too much." 

They endured quite a lot this spring semester; other than academics, they faced so much drama - the drama that all started with Jeongin and his uncontrollable jealousy. Jisung is thankful they tackled that, and now Hyunjin is completely over him. No one needs Jeongin in their lives; that boy ruined things. He depleted Hyunjin's and Jisung's friendship with Seungmin and Felix. Jisung doubts that he and Hyunjin would speak to the two boys ever again. He wishes he could, but felt that it was impossible, things are so awkward, and he hopes that they'll approach him one day. It's been so long, and they haven't apologized like how Changbin did. 

"We really did endure so much." Hyunjin nods at Jisung's words, and then he sighs, "Let's hope next semester goes well, yeah?" 

"Yeah." Jisung gives him a small smile. "I'll study better." 

It definitely is time to improve. 

"No, you won't," Hyunjin giggles, "You'll give up after reading like one sentence." 

"Not anymore, I will improve! Just watch!" Jisung defends himself. Suddenly a knock sounds on the door, and he quickly heads towards it, feeling that Minho was the one behind the door. Jisung smiles at that thought of Minho coming in and giving him a big hug; he wants one right now because of the happiness that warmed his insides. He swings the door open, and once he sees Seungmin and Felix standing there, his smile falls, and his thoughts about Minho extinguish. 

He drags his gaze down at their hands; they are holding onto bags containing food within them. 

"Food and make up?" Seungmin suggests. Jisung eyes widen a little, and the edges of his lips pick back up into a tiny smile. Forgiven. Seungmin mimics the smile, causing Jisung's smile to expand - all because of how genuinely happy Seungmin looks after a long time. His wishes from earlier are coming true. 

"Sure, come in," Hyunjin answers, wrap his fingers around Jisung's forearm, and pulls him away from the door, letting the two boys inside. Felix and Seungmin set the bags onto Hyunjin's desk before turning over to face Jisung and Hyunjin's direction. 

"I'm sorry," Felix begins. Jisung looks at his face carefully - it's been a while since he looked at his face thoroughly and intensely - the once twinkling eyes lost its light and now looked so hollow. It could be from stress. Felix seems as if he is trying his best to keep himself up and not break down. Jisung's heart hurt at this sight. "I'm so sorry that I waited until now to apologize. I've been so mean to you. I've hurt you so much over what Jeongin lied about, and I should've known better. I should've understood the pain that was in your eyes, yet I neglected and kicked you away without verifying things with you and Hyunjin. I apologize for being such a shit to you guys." 

Then Seungmin speaks, "It's summer vacation now, and here I am coming so late to apologize. Changbin knocked some sense into the both of us. I'm sorry about my attitude and the way I jumped to conclusions. I've known you for so long, yet my stupid self hurt you so much and ignored your feelings. I hope we can move on from what happened and start fresh again."

A smile tugged at the corner of Jisung's lips. When forgiving Changbin, he felt so free, like he broke from the chains of pain that were holding him down, and harmony flooded inside of him. It feels so good to no longer resent and hold onto these painful feelings. He felt so renewed now. 

"It's all okay," Jisung responds to the two who were waiting for his answers. He walks over to Felix and pulls him into a hug, and the day-younger boy hugs back tighter. His heartfelt so warm and light. 

Jisung hears a sniffle. At first, he thought it was Felix, so he pulls away to look at him, but Felix actually seems as concerned as Jisung is, and his attention is past Jisung's shoulder. Jisung spins around and sees that Hyunjin is the one with tears running down his cheeks. 

"Hyunjin, are you okay?" Jisung asks. 

Hyunjin ignored him. And in one swift motion, he jumps onto Seungmin, making them both tumble to the ground. Hyunijn's legs are around Seungmin's hip, and his arms are around his neck. Hyunjin clinging cutely on Seungmin made him resemble an adorable baby koala. They both looked so soft, and even though Seungmin isn't much of a hugger-type, he seems so happy to embrace Hyunjin. 

"I'm so happy and so sad, and so hungry," he sobs, "I think I might end up eating all the food." 

"Probably not," Seungmin laughs and runs one hand up and down Hyunjin's back to comfort the tall crying boy. "You get so full quickly."

"But, I feel so hungry!" Hyunjin whines, Seungmin slightly cringes. 

"Food isn't far from us," Seungmin retorts and lightly smacks Hyunjin on the back. 

Jisung feels a warm breath brush against his ear, and he slightly moves his head to the side and notices Felix leaning in. "I ship them, even though Seungmin likes someone else," he whispers. Jisung quietly laughs and nudges him playfully before drifting to his ear. 

"Same for Hyunjin, he likes someone else," Jisung whispers in his ear, before pulling back. 

"Let's celebrate our friendship and our summer vacation!" Hyunijn announces cheerfully and lifts himself from Seungmin and grabs the younger's hand to raise him from the floor as well. Felix quickly goes to grab the bags from the desk and sets them onto the floor. The four of them sit around the bags and start organizing the food. Once that was all done, they began eating and reflecting on their semester, mostly complaining about their classes. They talked about everything except the whole friendship mess between them and the entire situation with Jeongin. Moving on meant avoiding that topic because it will only make their hearts heavy. 

"What's your plan for this summer?" Hyunjin asks.

"Next week, I'll be going back to Australia to spend time with my family for a month, and then the next month, I'll come back to spend time with you guys before the semester starts," Felix answers. 

"Nice, Chan is going there too, but he needs to get permission from the company, though," Jisung replies. 

"Still, trainees?" Seungmin asks.

"Sadly, yes." Jisung frowns. 

"Hwaiting!" Felix smiles and pumps his fist in the air for Jisung. Jisung mirrors his smile and pats him on the shoulder showing his appreciation for that encouragement and motivation. "What are you planning on doing?" 

"Hmm, I don't know. I don't want to visit my parents because they will ask me so many questions about my uni life and ask about the subjects I took. They will basically ask me so many questions that I don't want to answer. Maybe I'll visit my brother and spend a lot of time with Minho." 

"You should introduce Minho to your cool brother," Seungmin suggests.

"Sounds like a plan," Jisung chuckles. He is sure that if he brings Minho to his brother, the two will get along very well. Jisung's brother - although a little too protective - cares a lot about Jisung and supports him more than his strict/conservative parents. 

"I'm going to visit my parents too, and see Kami. I miss her so much. I'm sure she doesn't miss me, though," Hyunjin says and juts his bottom lip into a pout. 

"She is Tsundere," Seungmin cackles, "But same here, Hyunjin, I'm going to visit my parents too, and brag about my spring semester accomplishments." 

"Stop making me feel jealous, Mr.4.0," Felix stretches his mouth into a flat line. "My only accomplishments are being a master at video games. I'm thinking about starting streaming." 

"I'll donate!" Hyunjin giggles. 

They spent the next few hours with each other, talking about life and some random other things. It was lovely being with each other after weeks of coldness and sorrow, but they moved past that, and Jisung is happy to have the two people he cherished back to him. Forgiving feels so wondrous. 

They enjoyed their time with each other well, but Felix and Seungmin couldn't stay for too long; one: because it's getting dark, and two: Felix wants to go over to Changbin's place and talk to him. 

Once the two of them left, Jisung and Hyunjin turned to each other with smiles on their faces. Both showing content they were.

\--------

Debuting? 

Jisung isn't so thrilled about it, like how Changbin and Chan were. He is staring out of the window of Chan's car, feeling every centimeter of gloom touching him. Hearing the news of their official debut in October is supposed to make Jisung happy and proud of himself because he worked hard, but it wasn't that way. 

Initially, Jisung was very excited about debuting, but once the contract was brought up during the meeting, one rule shot and shattered him. He didn't mind most of the rules except for one - the three-year dating ban. Three years? It's supposed to be alright, right? 

Wrong.

"We're going to sleep well tonight, aren't we?" Chan finally speaks. Jisung moves his head to look at the rearview mirror, seeing Chan's eyes focused on the road. His eyes are gleaming with tons of happiness. Chan and Changbin will sleep well tonight (Jisung isn't quite sure about Changbin though and still wonders if things between them are okay now); Jisung, however, isn't going to sleep well; he is going to be thinking about Minho. 

"Hmm, maybe," Changbin replies, "Or maybe I'll stay up all night filled with excitement." Ah. Okay. He is going to sleep well. That's good.

Chan stopped his car right in front of the building to Jisung's dorm; then, he turns around from his seat to smile and Jisung. "Have a great night!" Joy striking in his tone. Jisung forces a smile back, hoping it was convincing enough. 

He reaches to open his door, but then pauses midway when he remembers that Chan is leaving to head to Australia. "Chan, I hope you have a lot of fun in Australia!"

"You have a nice summer break," Chan replies. "I texted your surprise earlier, by the way, it's waiting for you by your dorm." 

"Surprise? Why?" Jisung asks. 

"You'll have to see yourself." Chan laughs. "Bye-bye!" 

Jisung playfully scowls, then smiles and waves goodbye at Changbin and Chan before leaving the car, eagerly wanting to see the said surprise near his dorm. 

Jisung heads inside the building and steps into the elevator. The second-floor ride somehow felt so long, but the excruciating seconds' worth of waiting is finally over once the door opens. He heads down the hallway and already spotted Minho waiting for him, leaning against the wall by Jisung's dorm room door, Jisung also notices that he is holding onto a small bag. That's when he concludes that Minho or the bag is the surprise. 

He walks over to Minho, who places the bag down and rushes over to Jisung with a big smile on his face. Minho lifts him from the floor and spins him around while giggling in joy. To Jisung, the giggles coming out of Minho are like waves of hurt pushing into Jisung, and the pain crawls up to his heart and bugs him there. How is he going to tell him, when Minho looks so happy right now? Jisung didn't want to demolish his happiness. 

Hot tears left Jisung's eyes and runs down his cheeks. 

"Congratulations, baby!" Minho places him down and kisses him on the forehead. Another wave of unbearable pain hits him, and Jisung starts sobbing loudly. "Is this a happy cry or a sad cry?" Minho asks.

This only makes Jisung cry even harder, and with the paw of his white hoodie, he wipes away the tears that soaked his cheeks. 

"You're not smiling, and look like you're in pain, so I'm guessing it is a sad cry. Did something happen? What's wrong?" 

Jisung lets out a heavy exhale, his breath stuttering along the way. "Three..." Unable to complete his sentence, he lowers his head and wipes away more of his tears. 

"Jisung, tell me what's wrong." Minho lifts Jisung's head with one hand, and with the other one, he strokes his blue hair. "Are you not happy with your debut?" 

It was in between. Jisung is happy that he gets to debut, but the dating ban is weighing down his happiness. He doesn't want to leave Minho over a rule; he felt heavily attached to him, he loved him so damn much and can't leave him. Ever. 

"Jisung?" Minho places his hands onto Jisung's waist to grab his attention. "Please tell me what is upsetting you. It's worrying me so much." 

"I don't want to hurt you," Jisung mumbles, feeling so small. 

"What's going to hurt me?" Sadness shadows in Minho's eyes. "Perhaps you lost interest in me?"

"Minho! I wouldn't lose interest in you, ever. I never loved someone as much as I love you. I love you more than I love cheesecake, a thousand times- no a million times more. Don't say such nonsense." Jisung grabs Minho's hand and kisses the back of it before dropping it. Then he wraps his arms tightly around Minho and snuggles his face onto his shoulder and inhales deeply to take in Minho's minty scent. 

Minho presses a kiss on the top of Jisung's head. "It seems like whatever you are sad about has to do something about me. Just tell me, whether it hurts me or not, I need to know." 

"Minho I don't-"

"Jisung!" Hyunjin shouts, cutting Jisung off and making the couple pull away from each other. Minho lets out an exasperated sigh, seemingly angry for the disturbance. Jisung, however, smiles at Hyunjin for being saved from explaining. "It's my turn now~." 

Hyunjin pulls Jisung into an air-restricting hug. "Congratulations! I'm so happy for you, Jisung! I'm going to come to every single one of your concerts! If I have the time. But I can make time for you!" 

That makes Jisung laugh. "Thank you for your energy. I feel so energized." 

Hyunjin lets Jisung go, and he smiles so brightly for him. Then when he looks over Jisung's shoulders, it fades. "Minho? Is he okay?" Jisung turns around and see's that Minho is walking away, heading near the elevator. 

Jisung's heart drops, and he rips from his spot and runs after him. 

"Minho! Wait!" Thankfully, Minho stops in his steps and turns to Jisung, not looking so happy at all. His lips are pressed in a hard line, and he narrows his eyes. Despite the anger freezing Jisung's skin, he decides to continue, "Why are you walking away?" 

"You think about that yourself, I'm leaving." He turns his head, and Jisung grabs his arm, preventing him from leaving.

"Don't leave, please."

Minho looks at Jisung and sighs. "When I congratulated you, you didn't seem so happy, but with Hyunjin, you were energized. Are you tired of me? Stop hiding it and tell me the truth. It will set you free, and I will try not to be hurt, depending on what you say." 

So he really wants to know. Jisung lets out a huff. "Minho, I'm not tired of you, I will never be."

"Then what the fuck is it?!" Minho shouts, making Jisung flinch. His yell hit Jisung in the heart, and it enables Jisung's stupid tears to fill his eyes once again. 

"Hey! Hey! Hey!" Hyunjin steps to them and flashes a displeased gaze towards Minho, looks at Jisung in sympathy, and then looks back at Minho. "Watch your mouth! Stop screaming at him, he has feelings too. You shouldn't force things out of him like that." 

"Well, if I can't force things out of him, then I might as well leave and sit and wait until he shows up and tells me something." Minho looks at Jisung. "Didn't I tell you that if you're angry or upset about something, you should confess about it to me? How am I going to understand what I am doing wrong if you keep silent about it? You're not getting anything from this, and are only making me feel so worried. It's okay if you don't feel like telling me anything, it's your words, but the fact that you're not telling me is hurting me more. I'll get going, and I'll wait until you decide to tell me." He tries to walk away, but Jisung grabs his arm again; Minho lets out a sharp breath. 

"Jisung, I'm going to go to the convenience store to buy some things. I'll be back in thirty minutes." Jisung nods at Hyunjin, who gave him one last look of pity and fear, and walks away. 

"Are you going to tell me or not? Stop wasting my time." Minho folds his arms over his chest and looks at Jisung impatiently. 

"I'm happy that you are excited about my debut, Minho, and I am sorry that I didn't show it and instead cried. I'm really thankful." Jisung tries to hug Minho, but the older boy stepped back. 

"Stop trying to beat around the bush, don't you know how I feel?" 

"Let's talk about it inside," Jisung sighs. He walked back towards his dorm, unlocks it, steps inside. Jisung holds the door open for Minho, who reluctantly steps inside with his bag. Jisung shuts the door and turns to Minho. 

"Are you going to tell me or no?" Minho stares hard at him. 

"I have a three-year dating ban," Jisung finally lets out after stalling Minho for what seems like too long. Those words broke Minho; it looked like he had been slapped in the face. 

"Jisung...I...oh god." Minho combs back his hair in distress. "You can't date for three years? How strict are they about that? Did they ask if you were dating?" 

"They made it clear that we are forbidden from dating for three-years, and they are strict about it. If we get caught dating, then we get kicked out of the group. They didn't ask if I was dating," Jisung answers. Minho frustratedly sits down on Jisung's bed. 

Then he looks up at Jisung from his spot; Minho's jaw is firm, and his face is rigid. "What's with this dating ban?" 

"To get us to focus solely on our activities and prevent us from getting into scandals that affect the group." 

"Jisung, does that mean that you want to break up with me? Is that why you didn't want to tell me anything earlier? You're right. This is hurting me so much." Jisung could hear the pain in his voice; the sound tortured him so much. 

"I don't want to break up with you! I'm not going to break up with you over a dating ban. Don't worry, since we haven't started our debut activities, maybe I will go to the company and tell them that I no longer want to be apart of the group. It will hurt me less if I leave voluntarily instead of getting kicked out." 

"Don't sacrifice what you worked hard for, for me. It's not going to make me feel any better. I don't want to guilt you into leaving nor make it seem like I forced you to abandon your dream to keep being with me. I want you to be happy." 

"Minho, you are my dream, and being with you makes me happy, more than anything else. Nothing will change that," Jisung replies. Minho gets up from Jisung's bed, cups Jisung's face with his hands, and rests his forehead onto his.

"Same for me. Honestly, if we break up, I don't think I can last. I will be in so much pain." Minho leaves Jisung's forehead but doesn't leave his eyes. "How about we hide our relationship from the public? They won't know unless they see. I will make sure you don't get in trouble. I hate to say this, but in public, let's act like best friends, no kissing or obvious affection. Then when we are away from people, we can do whatever we want without worrying." 

"You're so sneaky, and I hate that plan." Jisung sighs.

"Same," Minho replies, "Oh, I think you may already know, I bought you something." He gets his bag and hands it over to Jisung. "Chan texted me a couple of hours ago about the debut, and I decided to surprise you." 

"Wait. Are you the surprise or-"

"I'm the surprise." Minho laughs. "Surpirse~." Jisung blushes and smiles big. Minho presses a kiss against his cheek. "Look inside." Jisung does as he is told and inside the bag is cheesecake. 

"Thank you, Minho!" Jisung says and happily hugs the bag. Minho smiles and ruffles Jisung's hair before jumping onto Jisung's bed. He scoots back so that his back is pressed against the headboard. Then he spreads his legs and pats at the space in between. Jisung places the bag on the ground then quickly plants himself between Minho's legs, pressing his back against Minho's chest. 

For a few minutes, they sit in silence, Jisung stares straight ahead while Minho plays with his hair - occasionally softly tugging at the locks making Jisung feel satisfied. 

Jisung savored the minutes well, enjoying the way Minho was touching him. He closes his eyes at the comfort and starts listening to Minho's peaceful breaths. 

When Jisung starts getting bored with the silence, he shifts to face Minho and sees how he is in his world of thoughts. 

"Hello, Minho, are you there?" Jisung jokes, and he watches as Minho blinks into reality and cracks a tiny smile. 

"Yes, I'm here, I was just thinking about things." 

"Thinking?" Jisung cocks his head to the side curiously. "About what?" 

"I'm thinking about so many things. I'm thinking about visiting my parents and bringing you along with me; they like you a lot, especially my Mom, she says that you are so cute and sweet." Minho laughs. "Another thing I was thinking about is taking you to any place you want. We can spend a week or two there and take so many pictures." 

"I'd like that." Jisung snakes his arms around Minho's neck and pulls him in for a kiss. 

"It would basically be our honeymoon." Minho laughs once their lips parted, it was still close enough for Jisung to feel the warm grazes of Minho's breath. 

"We aren't married yet, isn't it too early for our honeymoon?' Jisung pointed out, though he liked the idea of getting married to Minho. 

"Let's get married then. I would love to get married to you."

"I would love to too, but let's wait after three years to get married," Jisung suggests, poking Minho on the nose with his nose. 

"Bleh, three years? Can I go to JYP and ruin the building?"

"If you want to get in huge trouble, then go ahead," Jisung replies. 

"Then, you better visit me in my cell." Minho sticks out his tongue teasingly. 

"I'd rather visit you in your apartment." 

"Then I won't get in trouble." Minho smiles and then continues to a different topic, "Next week, do you want to meet each other's parents?"

"Okay..." Jisung sighs. He isn't sure about bringing Minho to his parents as they are strict/conservative. 

"You don't look too happy about it, tell me why." Minho swipes at Jisung's fringe.

"My parents are strict. I'm scared that they will get mad at me for dating a man, instead of a girl." 

"Ah, understandable," Minho replies, "It's okay if you don't want me to meet them yet. I'll wait until your ready." 

"Thank you." Jisung smiles at him; Minho smiles back. 

\--------

The following week, Minho drives over to his parent's home, it wasn't too far away, and once they arrived, Jisung noticed how sophisticated and lovely the house looks. The two approach the door, and Minho rings the bell. After about a minute, Minho's Dad answers the door; he looks at Jisung and smiles at him. "You must be his boyfriend." 

Jisung bows, "Yes, it's nice to meet you." He feels mixtures of surprise and relief. Even when Minho assured him that his parents loved him, he still felt a bit of nervousness and anxiousness. 

"He is so handsome!" Minho's Dad compliments, and Jisung just blushes. "Come in." He steps aside and gestures for the two to enter inside the house. Once in, Jisung immediately looks at the large living room: there is a cream-colored couch, with a blue blanket messily placed on the armrest, and the walls are decorated with pretty paintings. 

He then notices a shelf against the wall opposite of him; it is filled with many trophies. Jisung wanted to ask about it and ask if he can look at the awards, but he decides not to and just follows Minho and sit down next to him on the couch.

"Where is Mom?" Minho asks. 

"She'll be home in a bit, right around dinner time. She is busy in her office," Minho's Dad responds, then looks at Jisung. "Tell me about yourself, Jisung-ah." 

It took Jisung a few seconds to come up with some exciting things to say, and he ended up talking about his passion for music and how he is going to debut soon. At first, he didn't think whatever he said was exciting and was bland, but Minho's Dad's reaction proved otherwise. 

"Wanna see my old room?" Minho says once his Dad leaves to prepare them dinner. 

"I want to see that first." Jisung points at the trophy shelf. Minho chuckles, and the two of them stand up and walk over to the shelf. 

"These are all of my awards I won from the competitions. It's not a big deal; think of it as a layout of my achievements," Minho says and scratches the back of his neck shyly. "I'm just happy that my parents let me participate in competitions, they were so fun." 

"I'm happy that you enjoyed the competitions," Jisung replies. He also wants to point out how cute Minho's humbleness is to him, but he decides to keep that to himself because Minho probably wouldn't want to hear anything related to that. 

Minho rests his hand on top of Jisung's head. "Now, do you want to see my room?" Jisung nods as a response. 

They reach Minho's room, which is located upstairs, and once Minho opened the door, Jisung immediately looked inside. In front of him is Minho's bed, with a dark grey comforter over the lighter grey sheets. Against the headboard are various plushies, and next to the bed is a medium-sized shelf, only a little bit taller than his bed. Within it was mangas and some other novels. Placed on the upper level of the shelf are lotion bottles and some skincare items. 

Minho immediately crashes onto his bed and spreads out his limbs. "Ahh, the mattress feels so nice. This one is better than the one back in the room in my apartment." 

"Then why don't you switch it?" Jisung walks into Minho's room and turns to the wall left of the bed. 

"Because it's too much work!" Minho whines from his bed, and Jisung could hear him shift around. 

Placed against the left wall is a black colored desk. On the wall are so many photos of Minho and his friends. The one that catches Jisung's attention the most is the one with both Minho and Jeongin together. Although Jisung disliked Jeongin, he still thinks he looks so fresh and innocent in the photo. 

"When was this taken?" Jisung asks. He hears Minho leave his bed, and the brunette steps over to Jisung's side and peers at the pictures. "That one." Jisung points at the photo he was talking about.

"Ohh, that one is taken in my final year of high school, in the summer, Jeongin was in his second year." 

"You guys were friends since high school?" Jisung turns his head to Minho.

"Yeah, but now we aren't friends." 

"Ahh, okay," Jisung replies and turns around to look at the shelf by the bed. "You have a lot of mangas there, is it okay if I can take a look at them ?"

"Yeah." Minho nods. 

Jisung smiles in joy and heads over to the shelf and squats in front of it. He scans through each of the mangas and pulls out the one that caught his eyes the most. It's the first volume of 'Ten Count' and in the front cover is a boy with lightish pink hair, and a mask covers his mouth. Jisung drags his gaze a little down and see's that his white button-up dress shirt is open- 

Minho snatched the manga from him. Jisung looks up at him with a pout, but when he notices how red Minho is - most likely from embarrassment - Jisung's pout turns into a smile. "Why did you take it away from me? I didn't get to see it well."

"No, you've seen enough." Minho places the manga back in its original spot and outstretches his hand for Jisung to grab. He grabs it and lets Minho hoist him up. 

"I wanted to see his tummy," Jisung cackles. Not that he did, he only said it to tease Minho. The teasing works though; the red in Minho's face remains where it is. Then, he scoffs and lifts his shirt, presenting his stomach, and yeah, Jisung looks at it well. 

"Mines is-" A clearing of someone's throat cut Minho off, and the two look over at the open door seeing Minho's Mom leaning her side against the frame. 

"Minho, what are you doing? Stop being a show-off and cover your stomach," she gently scolds.

"I have nothing to show anyway." Minho lets go of his shirt.

"Then why did you show me what you call a one-pack but what I consider a pretty and cute tummy?" Jisung chirps. Minho purses his lips. 

"Let's talk later." It looks like Minho isn't happy with what he just said, and Jisung swallows in nervousness. 

"Oh my goodness, Minho, don't threaten him. Let's come down for dinner. Your Dad finished cooking." 

The three sit at the dinner table. Minho and Jisung sat next to each other, and across from Jisung is Minho's Mom, and across from Minho is his Dad. 

"So, how did you two meet?" Minho's Dad asks. 

Minho and Jisung look at each other. Jisung knows how awful their first time meeting was. He tries to communicate with his eyes, telling Minho that it's okay not to share the whole part, but Minho turns his head back at his parents, and Jisung lets out a soft sigh. 

"Truthfully, I first met Jisung on the first day of University, we crashed into each other, and I said some mean things. I used to bully and tease him a lot. I always tried to hurt his feelings," Minho explains. "I apologized for it all, though."

"You  _ bullied _ him?" His Mom gasps and looks at Minho with so much disappointment. 

"I said I apologized!" Minho whines, "We are good now." 

"You shouldn't bully others! That isn't so nice!" She looks at Jisung. "You must have been so hurt. I'm so sorry about my son." 

"No, it's fine," Jisung replies, "Minho apologized to me, and then we became good friends, and now we are lovers." 

"Yeah, he better have apologized." Minho's Dad gives him a stern look. 

The first part of dinner didn't go too well and was filled with tenseness as Minho got scolded for being disrespectful towards Jisung. Jisung felt tremendously bad for him. Minho hurting him in the past didn't bother him anymore. The past remains in the past, and what matters to him most is how much Minho loves him now. 

Thankfully, the tense atmosphere lifted once his Mom asked about their plans for summer vacation, and Minho talked a lot about it, saying that he wanted to spend it with Jisung and wanted to go somewhere for vacation. 

\--------

Jisung closes Minho's bedroom door and looks at the older boy. "Why did you have to tell them that you used to mess around with me?" 

Minho steps over to him, his gaze piercing. " _ Jisung _ , you are getting pretty comfortable around me, aren't you?"

"What do you mean?" Jisung replies, not knowing what he was talking about. "Am I not supposed to be comfortable around you?"

"This," Minho points at his stomach, his stern look quickly replaced with a pout, and he whines, "Is not a pretty tummy, it's a one-pack! I have nothing to show right now because I'm saving the real show for later when I work out and get abs like you so that you wouldn't make fun of me." 

"I didn't make fun of your stomach," Jisung replies, "I said that it's a pretty and cute tummy. I'm sorry if it seemed like I was teasing you." 

Minho frowns, not looking any happier or better. Jisung sighs, places his hands on Minho's waist, turns him around to the wall, and presses him against it. With one hand, Jisung travels underneath Minho's shirt and touches his soft stomach. "Minho Hyung...I wish you would feel less insecure about yourself. There is nothing you need to change about yourself. You don't need to change to make me love you, and you don't need abs like me, because I love you just the way you are. I love you because you are Lee Minho, someone passionate, loves me, and takes care of me well." 

Minho starts crying at Jisung's words, and Jisung - with his other hand - cups Minho's cheek and presses a kiss against his lips. While kissing him, he moves his other hand up Minho's stomach and rests it right over his heart. 

Jisung moves from Minho's lips and looks him in his teary eyes. "Don't judge yourself, okay?" 

"Okay," Minho replies, and Jisung wipes away his tears. "I'm crying like this in front of you. This is so embarrassing." He sadly laughs. 

"Why do you think it is embarrassing?" 

"Because I always try to be strong around you, and I always try to comfort you when you are sad, now its the other way around, and I feel so weak in front of you."

"Minho, Minho, Minho." Jisung shakes his head. "You don't need to be strong in front of me." 

"Got that." Minho softly laughs. He moves his hand underneath his shirt, snakes it upwards, and lays his hand over Jisung's hand that is still resting over his Minho's heart. "I love you a lot."

"I love you a lot, a lot, a lot." Jisung laughs. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like I rushed HyunSungSeungLix's reunion. It's been weeks since they were apart and I wanted them back together :(


	25. Love Land

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Here is the last happy minsung focused chapter (the ending isn't happy, but the majority of the chapter is pretty happy)~ I hope you enjoy it!

Jisung is sitting at the side edge of his bed, squeezing onto his phone for no reason. Placed near his right foot is his bag. Minho called him minutes ago, asking Jisung if he wanted to stay over at his place, and of course, Jisung accepted. He always wants to be with Minho. He wants to breathe Minho. He wants to see Minho. 

He wants to be out to this dorm so he doesn't feel lonely or empty anymore. His best friend left to spend time with his family two days ago. Jisung would go back to his family as well, only if they weren't so strict over him and judgemental. He feels terrible and feels like a horrible son for not visiting them ever since he left. And even if those feelings cloud over him, he still chooses not to see him. 

Growing a little bored of the wait, Jisung lets his back fall onto the mattress, and he stares up at the plain white ceiling, doing nothing but thinking. The knocking on the door blinks him out of his thoughts, and quickly he gets out of his bed. He darts for the door, swings it open and wraps his arms around Minho. 

Soft laughter erupts from Minho. "Happy to see me, sweetie?" Minho presses a kiss on top of Jisung's head before ruffling his hair. 

"Yeah, I'm so happy to see you." Jisung pulls himself away from Minho's body, and with one hand, Minho cups Jisung's cheek and strokes it with his thumb. 

"Ready to go, pretty boy?" Minho asks, making Jisung blush furiously, his face blazing so much. Jisung quickly calms his insides down, turns around, and walks over to grab his bag and hangs it on his left shoulder. "I'll take it." Jisung opens his mouth to protest, but Minho quickly grabs the bag from him and promptly walks out of Jisung's dorm. Jisung follows after him, closes the door, and Minho loops an arm behind Jisung and draws him down the hall towards the elevator. 

The two arrive at Minho's apartment and head over to his room. Minho places Jisung's bag near his closet, then walks over to his bed and sits down. He pats the spot next to him, and Jisung makes his way over to him and plants himself next to the older. 

"Would you like to move out of your dorm and stay here with me, permanently? I love it when you are here with me and around me," Minho says. Jisung feels the same. He wants to be with Minho at all times. But he feels the same with Hyunjin. Jisung can't find himself leaving Hyunjin to live with Minho. 

He doesn't know how to respond and doesn't know what he should do. And it causes Minho to turn his head to him, curiously. "Are you okay?" 

Finally, Jisung's inhales anxiously and responds, "I'm sorry, Minho, I don't want to move in here. I want to stay at my dorm." Jisung notices how Minho's expression didn't lift. He doesn't look assured or anything. The look on his face makes Jisung's heart turn.

"How do you like being in your dorm? If I were you, I wouldn't last in there. It's so cramped. There isn't a lot of open space." He is right; the dorm Jisung stays in is small and fits two beds - the distance between two beds isn't very far, it's a bit shorter than Jisung's height and at the foot of the beds are their desks. He doesn't mind it at all. Even if his dorm is small, he doesn't want to leave because Hyunjin is with him there. 

"It's not about the space. I don't even mind it that much. I don't want to leave Hyunjin. I like being with him." That response wasn't right, and now Jisung needs a bandage for his hurting heart. It isn't the icy tension between the two inducing his pain; it's also that look on Minho's face. His slightly furrowed eyebrows show how Minho is angry but is trying to hold it in. Nonetheless, he doesn't have any ounce of happiness in him at all. 

"So you don't want to move in here with me because of Hyunjin? Do you like him better than you like me?" Minho says, breaking this menacing silence. Jisung swallows dry. 

Yeah, Jisung likes Hyunjin a lot because he is his best friend; they've been together for years. Jisung knew Hyunjin longer than he knew Minho, and even though he trusts Minho a lot, Jisung trusts Hyunjin with all his heart to the point he can tell him everything. Hyunjin is his partner in crime. Jisung can ultimately be himself around Hyunjin. That's how much he loves and appreciates his best friend. Jisung wants to tell Minho this, to get him to understand him, but he resorts to saying: 

"Minho, I love you a lot, and I love Hyunjin as a best friend."

"But who do you love more, Hyunjin or me?" He doesn't get it, and Jisung is so damn disappointed in him. He stands up, crosses his arms over his chest, and glares at the brunette. 

"I see how it is! Tell me this, Minho, who do you love more, your cats or me?" He strikes back, and it knocks Minho's mouth open in shock. Jisung waits for his response, and when Minho doesn't respond, Jisung thinks that means the older gets it. "Understand how I feel now? Or do I need to fucking leave for you to realize what you are doing?!" 

Jisung believes that this is the first time he yelled at Minho, and he starts feeling bad. He turns away so that Minho couldn't see the tears collecting in his eyes. Then he starts stepping away, and he doesn't get too far because now Minho has his arms wrapped around Jisung from behind, resting his chin against his shoulder. 

"Don't leave," Minho softly pleads.

"Why shouldn't I?" Jisung snaps back - no anger in his voice - his voice turns out sad. 

"Because I was wrong. I'm sorry for asking you such questions, doubting you, and being jealous.

Jisung grabs Minho's wrist, pulls his arms away from his waist, and spins around to face him. "Jealous of Hyunjin?" Minho bites his bottom lip and nods. "May I ask why?" 

"He gets to spend more time with you." Minho pokes Jisung in the nose with his pointer finger. "That's why I am so jealous. He sees you more than I do, and sometimes I can't help but wonder what you two do together." 

Jisung sighs out of frustration at those words, pushes Minho onto the bed, and sets himself on Minho's lap. He grabs Minho's face between his hands and kisses him. Minho wraps his arms around Jisung's again and attempts to pull himself closer to his body. 

Jisung parts from him once he feels out of breath. He stares into Minho's eyes lovingly as he regains his breaths, and once Jisung feels collected enough, he speaks. "Minho, I am all yours, only yours. I'm not Hyunjin's or anyone else's. Nothing will change that. I want to clarify that Hyunjin and I do not have feelings for each other at all. We love each other as best friends, nothing more and nothing less." 

"I'm sorry for assuming," Minho mutters. 

"It's okay, hot stuff." Jisung turns cherry-red after letting that name slip out. Minho's eyes go wide, his mouth falls a little open, and light red coats his cheeks as well. Then Minho's expression swaps immediately to a smug one, and he lifts himself from his bed, carrying Jisung in his arms, drops him down onto the mattress, and climbs over him, his knees firmly on the space between Jisung's legs. 

"Say it one more time, Jisung," he growls.

"H-Hot stuff..." Jisung says now in a softer way. Minho roughly kisses him, then licks Jisung's lip, the younger parts his lips to let Minho's tongue in, and Minho starts licking into Jisung's mouth. Jisung moans at the hot feeling coiling in his stomach, and his hands reach Minho's back, and he clenches on his shirt. 

"Jisung, you are the one that is so fucking hot. You look so hot right under me." Jisung whines as a reply, and Minho licks his jawline, then starts kissing around his neck. He sits upright, pulls off his shirt, then tugs at the hem of Jisung's shirt, and the younger lifted his upper body, enabling Minho to take off his shirt as well. 

Jisung smiles up at him, and the older boy smiles back. "I love you, Minho." 

"I love you too," Minho replies before kissing him again. 

\--------

The sound of his phone ringing wakes him up, pulling him away from a good dream. Jisung furrows his brows, turns to his side and reaches for his phone placed on the nightside, and smiles when he sees Hyunjin's name on the screen. He swipes his thumb on the screen to answer the call. 

"Hey, Hyunjin, what's up?" 

"Just checking in with you." Hyunjin laughs softly. "You sound like you just woke up. Sorry for waking you up. I missed you so much, and I am so happy to hear your voice. It's been ages!"

"It's only been three days Hyung," Jisung replies and sits upright. 

"You sound like you don't miss me! You're so cruel! How can you do this to me!? Whyyy!" Hyunjin cries in a whiny tone, and Jisung - even though he couldn't see Hyunjin's face - can tell Hyunjin is pouting right now. 

"Hyunjiiin, I do miss you a lot. For the past few days, I felt so empty and lonely without you by my side until Minho asked if I wanted to stay over with him, so here I am now, in my boyfriend's comfy bed. How are you doing?" 

"It's good to hear that you miss me too," Hyunjin flippantly scoffs, and Jisung laughs. "But I'm doing great! I'm having so much fun! Kkami was glad to see me. She came right at me once she saw me come home. I'm so happy!" Hyunjin shrills. "How are you doing?" 

"I'm doing well, too, since I'm with Minho." 

"Of course, of course." Hyunjin laughs. "So do you have any love stories-" he gets cut off by Kkami's barking. "Kkami, let me talk to Jisungie." Hyunjin whines, Kkami continues to bark, and Jisung couldn't hold in his laughter. He stops laughing when he hears Hyunjin sigh. "I'm so sorry, Jisung, give me a minute. I think Kkami wants a snack." 

Jisung keeps his phone at his ear while waiting for Hyunjin to return. He then sees Minho coming inside, and Jisung smiles at him, put his phone on speaker, and sets it back on his nightstand. He spreads out his arms for Minho, who climbs onto his lap and attaches himself onto Jisung, letting the younger boy hug him. 

"Did you sleep well, baby?" Minho asks. 

"Yeah." 

Minho pulls away, then kisses Jisung. "Breakfast is ready. I made pancakes. Or I mean, I  _ tried _ to make pancakes, burned the first two, but the other ones turned out a little better at least." 

Jisung giggles. "Thank you, burned or not, I'd still eat them because you made them." 

"You so sweet," Minho coos and pinches Jisung's cheek. 

"Okay, Jisung, I am back," Hyunjin says. Minho lets go of Jisung's cheek, and Jisung reaches for his phone, turns off the speaker mode, and nears his phone to his ear. "Okay, so, do you have any love stories to tell me?" 

"Why do you want to hear love stories from me?" Jisung raises a brow, even though the other boy couldn't see it. Minho sighs a little and leans into Jisung, resting his forehead against Jisung. Jisung places his free hand on Minho's back. 

"Because I am your best friend and need to make sure how your love life with Minho is going." 

"It's going well, thank you for caring," Jisung replies. 

"I said a story!"

"Nope, sorry. I'll go now. I wanna eat the pancakes Minho made me." Minho raises his head and smiles at Jisung. The younger boy blushes a tiny bit from the eye contact. 

"Okay, okay. But you better tell me your story! Byee~" Hyunjin says and then hangs up. Jisung puts his phone down, and Minho quickly rises from Jisung's lap and exits the bed heading towards the door; Jisung follows right after him. When they arrive in the kitchen, they sit across from each other.

Jisung looks down at his plate and blasts a big smile at how nicely Minho decorated the pancakes. Whipped cream is the smile, eyes, eyebrow, and the nose, and on top of the whipped cream is chocolate chips. The pancake looks so mesmerizing. 

He looks at Minho. "It looks so pretty!" 

"You're prettier." Damn it - a way to charge Jisung's heart in the morning. Jisung hides the way he is feeling by looking down at the pancake that is smiling at him. He playfully smiles at it and lifts his fork - well, too bad, the pancake will be going into his mouth. 

\--------

Minho is alone in the living room, Jisung being in the bathroom showering. He is on the couch, with his laptop on his lap. Yesterday, the two of them decided that Jeju Island should be the destination for their trip. 

Minho finished paying for the plane tickets for the two of them minutes ago. Now he is doing the simple stuff. He is searching for places to go there, despite going to Jeju with his Dad two summers ago for a business trip. He didn't get to do too much there, though. Therefore, Minho is now looking for places to visit. He wants to do a lot with Jisung there and have so much fun with him. 

A whiff of Minho's sweet-smelling shampoo reaches his nose, and he looks over at Jisung, who made his way to his couch and sat down next to Minho. Minho places his laptop down at the coffee table in front of him and turns to Jisung, grabbing the soft white towel from him and helping him dry his hair.

"I see you are looking at places," Jisung softly says. 

Minho hums. 

"Is there any way I can help? I don't want you to do everything." Minho shakes his head, causing Jisung's expression to drop. "Really? Are you sure?" 

He drapes the towel onto Jisung's neck once he finishes drying his hair, and he leans forward and smells his hair. He then pulls back only a little, his lips lingering very near Jisung's forehead. Minho kisses him there before leaning back against the back cushion. "There is nothing I want you to do besides relax right now. I finished with everything." 

"Everything?!" He practically screeches; Minho only nods. "You mean you paid for the tickets and booked for the hotels? What the hell!" Jisung stands up and looks down at Minho. He looks so mad, making Minho's heart twist. "Why?" 

"Han. Jisung. I breathe money- no, I mean my parents breathe money, there is no reason for you to feel angry at me, okay? I'm doing this for the enjoyment of both of us." 

Jisung stays silent for a few seconds. Then he crosses his arms over his chest, plops down onto the couch, keeping far away from Minho. "Just because your super-rich doesn't mean you have to pay for everything," Jisung grunts out. "I have money too." 

"I know, sweetie." Minho scoots over to him, only to have Jisung scoot away more, the side of his body pressing against the armrest. Jisung turns his body away from Minho, making his back face him. "Jisung, are you mad at me?" Minho asks the obvious. 

"Baby?" 

"Talk to me." 

Jisung gives him the silent treatment. Growing sad, Minho pokes his back. Jisung doesn't budge. He rests the side of his face on his back and lets out a sigh. "Jisung, please talk to me." Silence. Minho pouts, even though Jisung couldn't see it and then scrunches his face and says, "You don't love me anymore!" Minho fake-wails. 

It makes Jisung flip around and grab Minho's face between his hands. Jisung kisses him on the lips. "Minho, I do love you. I'm just mad at you." He kisses him again and presses his forehead against his. "Why pay for the two of us?" 

"Because I felt like it." 

"Why did you feel like it?" 

"Because I love you." Minho kisses him and wraps his arms around the younger's waist. Jisung's drops his hand from Minho's face and plants them on his shoulder. 

"If you love me, then cancel my flight ti-" 

"Jisung, baby, I love you so much. But I'm not going to cancel. Sorry, not sorry." 

Jisung puts on the biggest frown that Minho thinks he never saw through his entirety of knowing Jisung. That frown upsets Minho a lot and makes feelings of gloom trace throughout his body. What bugs him even more, though, is when Jisung forcefully pulls away from Minho and stands up, seeming like he wanted to leave the living room. Minho stands up and softly grabs him before Jisung even takes a single step away. 

"Jisung, look at me." The younger doesn't, and Minho forcefully spins him around and places his hands on his hips. "Yes, I did pay for the plane tickets, but it's not even expensive. The hotel we are staying in for a week is one of the luxury hotels my Dad owns. We get in for free. Now, do you feel better?" 

Jisung lets out a sigh. "I am so sorry for lashing out on you." 

"Baby, it's okay." Minho gently pulls him down onto the couch and wraps an arm around him from behind. "Have you been to Jeju before?" Jisung shakes his head. "I guess we can plan together then." 

\--------

"Take care of my cat's well~" Minho smiles at his Dad. 

"I will," his Dad chuckles, and pulls Minho into a hug, then lets him go and pats Jisung on the shoulder. "Enjoy your trip well." 

They head to the lounge and sit down on the comfy chairs. As they wait for their flight, Minho takes several pictures of Jisung and him. He wasn't kidding when he said that he wants to take a lot of pictures. 

Soon, they board their plane, sitting next to each other. Minho ends up falling asleep, and Jisung leans into Minho, resting his head onto his shoulder, and closes his eyes. The two of them didn't sleep well last night because they were too excited to fall asleep. 

Minho calls a cab to take them to their hotel. When seated, Minho falls asleep right away, resting the side of his body against Jisung's. Jisung runs his fingers through Minho's soft hair as he looks out the window, taking in the view of this place. Although he hasn't seen much yet, it's a nice place based on what he's seen so far. The trees are beautiful; the buildings are beautiful,  _ everything _ is so beautiful. 

Soon, the driver stops in front of the majestic hotel building. Around it is such a beautiful environment - there is a large swimming pool in front, and the area looks super clean. It's like a palace. 

Realizing that he's staring for too long, he rips his gaze from the pretty sight and looks at Minho, who is still sound asleep. "Minho, we're here." 

"Hm?" Minho slowly raises his head, his eyes still looking pretty tired. Jisung opens his door and holds it open for Minho. They take out their luggage, thank the driver and head straight into the hotel building. When they step inside, it seems like the staff recognized Minho, and they greeted him with a bow. 

They arrive at their room on the third floor, and once they get inside, Jisung lays down on the large bed. It felt so comfortable, like he is lying on fluffy clouds. 

Minho opens his suitcase, takes out some clothing, takes off the clothes he has on, and replaces them with a comfortable attire - a white shirt and baggy grey sweats. Beforehand, Minho dressed fashionably, very fashionably - black turtle neck, black jeans with a long beige plaid coat.

Minho moves onto the bed and lays close to Jisung, and drapes an arm over his chest. "Do you want to eat anything yet?" Jisung asks Minho. He is feeling a bit hungry and wants to eat something. 

"No, not yet. I want to sleep first. But if you're hungry, we can go to the dining area," Minho answers. 

"No, I'm not hungry yet," Jisung lies, but he doesn't want to eat anything anymore and wants Minho to rest up well before they head for dinner. He snuggles closer to the older. "Sleep well," he whispers to him; Minho opens his eyes a little, smiles at Jisung before closing them again. 

\--------

After they finished eating dinner, Jisung - who ate a lot - falls asleep right as he lands on the bed. Minho softly laughs and lays on his side with his head propped with his hand, and he watches the younger sleep. He looks so peaceful. 

Minho's phone begins to ring, and he widens his eyes and snatches it from the nightstand. He answers Chan's call and looks at Jisung once more, hoping that his phone didn't wake him up. Thankfully, he is still asleep peacefully, breathing softly. 

"Hi Minho, how are you doing?" Chan asks. 

Minho smiles and softly replies, "I'm doing well. I'm in Jeju with Jisung right now. So far, we are having fun. He is sleeping right now after eating a lot of food." Minho softly laughs. "How are you doing?" 

"I'm having fun too," Chan replies, then stays silent briefly before chuckling. "I'll finally tell you, after a long time of not doing it. You saying how Jisung is asleep reminded me of something I didn't tell you yet, and now I will. Remember that night, Changbin and I invited Jisung over for a hang-out?" 

"Yes," Minho replies, desperate to hear what happened that night. He hopes he didn't do anything stupid or said anything stupid. 

"Once upon a time, I was sitting on the other end of the couch, working on a track while you and Jisung were fast asleep. Suddenly, I felt movement, looked to my side, and saw you mumbling 'you feel nice,' and I felt so weirded out. You then moved on top of Jisung and stayed there; I focused back on my track but was distracted again when you said, 'Jisung, don't you know how handsome you are?' You said a few other things. They were all compliments, and then you somehow kissed him." Chan laughs, and Minho's face is burning hot. 

"I k-kissed Jisung?" Minho's eyes are instantly wide, and with his unoccupied hand, he dishevels his hair frustratedly. He is Jisung's first kiss, not the other silver-haired bitch, it's supposed to be good news for Minho, but that isn't the case at all. He was so stupid in his sleep, how can he do such a thing - he feels so embarrassed. 

_ Fuck.  _

"Yep," Chan affirms. "You don't sound too good. Tell me what's wrong." 

"I feel so stupid."

"Don't feel that way."

Suddenly, Minho felt Jisung brush his fingers against Minho's hand, and he looks at the younger who is wide awake. "Chan...I'll hang up now. Have a great time in Australia." 

"You have fun in Jeju, bye-bye." Minho hangs up, places his phone back on the nightstand, and turns to Jisung. 

"Sorry for waking you up, Chan called." 

"I know." 

Silence. 

They stare at each other and don't exchange another word; it's making Minho's chest feel so full, and his heart pounds in apprehension. He decides to speak. "Remember that night-" 

"I heard you and Chan talk." 

"Jisung..."

Jisung smiles. "You are my first kiss? Why do I feel so happy?" 

"Because it's me." Minho smiles, the full feeling in his chest leaves. "How long were you awake?" 

"Ever since your phone rang," Jisung replies. 

"Shit...I'm so sorry."

Jisung kisses Minho's cheek. "It's okay. And don't fret about the kiss." Jisung sit's on Minho's thighs and cups his face lightly. "I like that you were the first ever to kiss me. It makes me so happy because the person I truly love kissed me first." 

Jisung kisses Minho firmly, wrapping his arms around Minho's neck while the older wraps his arms around Jisung's waist, pulling Jisung closer to his body. 

"Where do you want to go tomorrow?" Minho asks once they've pulled away. 

"Hmm, I don't know. What would you like to do?"

"Hiking?" Minho asks. 

"Sounds good to me~," Jisung giggles. 

\--------

Hiking is what they do the next day; for  _ two hours _ . They walked around and looked around for those two hours. Walking at first wasn't too bad for Jisung until they walked too much. His heels hurt so much, and it is worse when he steps on the rocks near the water. Minho stops walking to take a picture of the waterfall far away in front of him. 

Jisung takes this chance to sit down and relax his legs in front of him, giving himself a much-needed break. 

"So pretty~," Minho says as he takes several pictures of the waterfall. "Jisung stands here. I wanna take a picture of you." It takes a lot of effort for Jisung not to groan, but he forces himself to stand in front of the waterfall, and Minho takes a lot of pictures. 

"All this walking brought me an appetite," Minho mutters and pats his stomach. "Are you hungry too?" 

Jisung frantically nods. "Let's eat a lot!" 

\--------

They arrive at a restaurant Jisung wanted to go to, and they ordered their food and ate. Even when they finished eating, they remain seated at their spots, giving themselves a small break. 

"Should I get a new phone?" Minho asks, placing his phone down onto the table. "For the past week, it keeps on freezing randomly and works so slow." 

"How long ago did you buy it?" Jisung asks. 

"Two months ago, and it's the newest model." Minho sighs. "I don't know what happened to it. Even the battery dies so fast." 

"That's weird, and you didn't buy it too long ago," Jisung mutters a reply, "Did you download too many apps or something?" 

"No, not a lot of apps, only a few games and a lot of pictures, but I have a lot of storage, I checked." 

"I think you should get it repaired." 

"Yeah," Minho sighs again.

They leave the restaurant and take the bus to the museum, specifically the teddy bear museum. 

Happiness fills Jisung; there are so many teddy bears! Minho laughs at the expression on Jisung's face, and they start touring around the museum. When Jisung sees a gift shop, he ditches Minho and heads right in - immediately looking around at all the teddy bears. 

"Isn't this so cute?" Jisung points at the bear with a pastel blue shirt. When he doesn't hear a response, he looks away from the bear, and from his spot, he peers around the shop. "Minho?" He leaves the shop and looks left and right. Minho isn't anywhere nearby, and Jisung begins to panic. 

"Minho, why are you so fast?" He quietly whines to himself and sped walks straight ahead. Eventually, he spots Minho taking a picture of a tall teddy bear, and Jisung pouts and steps over to him. 

"Let's take a picture with this bear," Minho says when he notices Jisung. He grabs Jisung's wrist and is about to pull Jisung towards the bear, but stops when he sees how sad Jisung appears. 

"What's wrong, baby?" He asks, letting go of Jisung's wrist. 

"I got lost." 

"You did?! I didn't notice." Minho looks so guilty. "I'm so sorry." He pulls him in for a hug. Jisung gladly circles his arms around Minho and nuzzles his face into his shoulder. "When did you get lost?"

"I wanted to go to the teddy bear store, so I went there. I thought you were right behind me."

"Do you want to go there?" Minho asks. 

Jisung pulls away and happily nods. "But right after we take a picture with that cutie," Jisung says and smiles up at the bear. Minho chuckles. 

After taking a few pictures together with the bear, they head to the teddy bear store, buy bears for each other before leaving the museum, and taking the cab back to their hotel. 

"I have so many photos on my phone already," Minho says and sits down on the bed. "The photobook is going to be filled with our pictures from Jeju Island." 

"Let's call it Jisung and Minho's adventure in Jeju Island," Jisung says and giggles. 

\--------

Near the evening, Minho and Jisung head to the Sauna/Bathhouse to ease their muscles after the long periods of walking today. Jisung felt like he needs this sort of warm relaxation. 

After removing all their clothes (much to Jisung's embarrassment), they head to the washing area to cleanse themself. 

Jisung's been to a Sauna a few times before, but he couldn't help but still feel insecure a little for being naked in front of others. It felt like eyes were on his skin when actually the only eye on him is Minho's eyes - who is rubbing his back with soap.

Minho drags his hands up Jisung's back and lays them on his shoulders. "Jisung, are you okay? You seem tense." 

"Yes, I am okay," Jisung bashfully mutters a reply. Minho presses a quick kiss on the back of his neck and returns to rubbing soap around him. 

Once they finished cleaning and washing their body, Jisung grabs his towel and wraps it around his waist, covering his center, and Minho does the same. "Do you want to go to the hot tubs, or do you want to go to the sauna area?" Minho asks. 

"Hot tubs~," Jisung joyfully replies. Minho smiles; happily, he seems to like that answer.

They head towards the tubs and dip into the one without people in it. The hot water instantly does it work and helps loosen Jisung's tense muscles, and he lets out a soft 'ahh.' Minho catches the sound and smiles at Jisung. 

The twenty minutes went by with minimal conversations and extreme comfort. They head out and get changed into the Sauna attire - pink pajama shirt and shorts - and walk around the common area. There is a lot of people here, quietly talking to each other, and some are eating. 

"I'm hungry." Minho stops walking and heads towards the food counter. Jisung stands beside him and looks at the menu. They order instant noodles, dumplings, and hard-boiled Sauna eggs, and rice drinks. They pick a spot to sit at and begin eating their food. 

"I love this place. I wish I can live here forever. It's so warm," Jisung says after swallowing.

"I was so excited to come here. I'm having so much fun here. I think it would be even better to visit Saunas in the winter when it's cold. We can warm ourselves up on the outside and even on the inside by drinking soup," Minho says.

"I like that idea. Maybe we can come here again for your second photobook - Jisung and Minho's adventures in Jeju Island 2.0! I'd love to come here with you again," Jisung replies, and Minho slightly blushes.

"I'd love to come here again with you again, too, Jisung." They both look at each other in the eye, and when Minho smiles, Jisung smiles as well. Like that, they stare at each other for a few seconds and laugh before finishing up their food and throwing the empty containers away. 

The two head inside one of the Kilns and lay down on the heating mat, letting the heat soak their backs and make them sweat. 

"I'm so hot," Minho breathes out. 

"Yes, you are,  _ hot stuff _ ," Jisung giggles. Minho ends up ripping his gaze away from where he was staring, rolls his body to Jisung, and rests his head on Jisung's thighs. Jisung sits upright and leans down to press a kiss against Minho's forehead.

"You make me feel so happy, Jisung," Minho murmurs and closes his eyes. 

Jisung snakes his fingers into Minho's hair and massages his sweaty scalp. "You make me feel so happy too. You mean so much to me."

\--------

For the next few days, they tour around the island a lot. They walked around the national parks, visited some museums. It is the most walking Jisung has ever done in a week, and his legs are very sore. He doesn't admit it to Minho, though, and keeps it to himself. 

Venturing here on this island was so much fun. Jisung loved it here so much, but sadly today is the last full day here. Minho told Jisung that there are two more places he wants to take him before they head to their hotel and leave this island the next morning. 

Their next destination is a place called love land. What Jisung expected was a place filled with love related things, like hearts and stuff. What he didn't expect was a place filled with erotic things and nudity. 

Minho cackles at the surprised and astonished look on Jisung's face. "Do you like it so far?"

"Thanks for asking," Jisung rolls his eyes. He continues through the path and looks around. Minho looks around in enthusiasm, and honestly, Jiusng is feeling the same thing. The sculptures look so interesting, detailed and they are so artistic. It must have taken a lot of time and effort for the creators to create these sculptures. Even if it's making Jisung feel flustered, he can help but stare in awe. 

Minho takes out his phone and takes several pictures of the sculptures as they walk by each one. 

"Jisung, can you stand by that one? I want to take a picture of you with it." Jisung complies and stands by it. Minho giggles and takes a picture before waving for Jisung to follow him. 

"Want to try out this position when we get back?" Minho points at a sculpture. Jisung looks at it and turns red.

"Minhoooo!" 

"Whaaaaaat?" 

"You're weird." 

"What did you just say?!" Minho makes a face, and Jisung starts running away from him. Jisung quickly looks back at Minho, who is right at his foot, and laughs at him. Minho ends up picking up his pace to a sprint and captures Jisung, causing him to let out a squeal. 

He kisses Jisung on the neck. "Got you~."

Jisung giggles and turns to Minho, wrapping his arms around his waist. "You're weird, but I love that about you." Minho smiles and ruffles his hair.

"Weird just for you."

\--------

The final destination is the beach, and after messing around in the cold water, the two rest their soaked body on the warm sand. Jisung and Minho both have their legs sprawled out in front of them, and they are watching the sun go down - creating a pretty blend of pink and orange in the sky (Minho takes a picture of it.)

"I can't believe this week went by fast," Jisung mutters. "I'm going to miss it here so much." He looks over at Minho, whose gaze remains in the sky, but when he notices Jisung looking at him, he meets his eyes. "Thank you for bringing me here." 

Minho smiles at him before looking up at the sky again. "Thank you for making me have a fun time here. I love and appreciate you for being here by my side and for being my light. You make me so happy, Jisung. You are the sweetest and the cutest. You are pretty like this sky." 

Jisung scoots over to Minho's side, the side of his body touching the older boy's body. Minho slides his hand to Jisung's and holds his hand. "I love you." 

"I love you too." 

\--------

"Were my cats well behaved and treated you nicely?" Minho asks his Dad once he slides into the back seat with Jisung. He hopes his cats behaved well around his Dad for the week Minho was gone. 

"Yes, they were super well behaved and sweet," his Dad replies, "How was your trip to Jeju?" 

"It was great! I had so much fun!" Minho replies, Jisung nods in agreement. 

"How was the hotel?" Of course, he'd ask that. 

"Very comfortable, and the staff was very welcoming and considerate," Minho replies, being honest. 

"I'm glad to hear that." 

Finally, after a couple of minutes, they arrive at his apartment - the two wave goodbye at his Dad before heading into the building with their luggage. They use the elevator and arrive at Minho's floor, and once at the door, Minho lets go of his suitcase and enters the code to unlock the door. 

When he opens the door, he immediately sees something horrendous and widens his burning, tear-filled eyes. He hears Jisung let out a gasp. 

The sight in front of him made massive waves of pain touch his heart and twist it tortuously. He falls on his knees. "N-no," he cries out and then screams out in pain, oppression, and anger. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hoped you enjoyed this chapter :'D Even though it was super cringy. From now on, a lot of the chapters up ahead will be angst heavy. So many not so good things will happen to some of the characters. There may be one or two deaths of the main characters. I'll list the characters again, two amongst the five of them will possibly die: Minho, Jisung, Felix, Hyunjin, and Jeongin.


	26. A heavy damage

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter turned out so dramatic. I wrote it quickly and was able to update fast. I have a little more free time now after dropping out of a class that overwhelmed me so much. 
> 
> I only read over this chapter twice, so sorry for any grammar mistakes, I also put my full trust in Grammarly lmao. I hope you enjoy this chapter!! 
> 
> Warnings: Death, non-consensual touching, sexual assault.

"No..." Minho wails; the pain and sadness are so intense in his voice that Jisung felt himself crack. What's even more painful to see is how painfully Minho crawls over to his three cats placed close to each other in front of the coffee table - dead and bleeding. It's a murder.

Jisung stood where he is, still as a statue, unable to move because of the gruesome sight in front of him. He wants to do something, he wants to help Minho, but he couldn't bring himself to move. He is just as upset and shocked. Who could do such a cruel thing? 

Minho picks up one of his cats - Doongie - and hugs her tightly, pressing his cheek onto its head. "Come back to me...please come back to me...I need you." 

Jisung shifts his eyes, looking elsewhere, not being able to hold his gaze on them any longer. Tears slip past his eyelids, and he tries his best not to make a sound. The loud crying coming from the distressed boy makes Jisung's heart submerge lower than it already is. 

Jisung takes in a sharp inhale, trying to calm himself down so he can call the police without breaking down and without his voice sounding so frail and broken. His hands shook as he reaches into his pocket for his phone. Minho's hard sobs pierce into Jisung's ears, cracking him more. He bites onto his tongue; he needs to calm down, but it's so hard because this place is becoming nothing but gloom, and Minho's cries are a hammer pounding against Jisung. 

Eventually, he calls the police, informing them about the situation and answering their annoying questions with difficulty. 

"I'm so sorry...I'm so sorry...I shouldn't have left you..." 

He returns his eyes to Minho. The boy is holding onto all three of his cats now, peppering kisses onto their heads. 

Jisung dubiously steps over to Minho and lays his hand on his shoulder. The older boy places down his cats carefully before he stands up and turns to face Jisung. Blood covers Minho's dark grey hoodie and his hands. 

Jisung draws his gaze up and sees the ice in Minho's fierce red, teary eyes. The wet eyes showing anger and sadness are ice touching Jisung's body, making him feel cold and causing chills to run over his body. He opens his mouth to speak, comfort him, do anything to calm Minho, but Minho intrudes with a scary, demanding voice. "Leave." He says it sternly, his voice coated with ice. Jisung doesn't budge. 

"I'm not leaving you here, Minho. I'm going to stay here with you. I want to help you." 

"Leave," he says more coldly if that is possible. The coldness is already harsh enough in his tone. It's making Jisung feel frightened and small. Even if he feels that way, it's not going to make him leave. He doesn't want to leave Minho and let him stay in the sullen place alone and unattended. 

"Leave!" Minho pushes Jisung firmly, making him land on the floor. Jisung looks up at the older boy in a wounded way, and his stupid tears begin to stream from his eyes and down his cheeks again. He shakes his head and fixes Minho a stern look through his tears. 

"I said leave!" Minho yells, then grabs Jisung's arm, pulls him to his feet, and pushes him towards the door. 

Jisung pushes Minho back. "No." 

"I don't want to see you here!" Minho growls. "You so damn annoying and stubborn! If I tell you to leave, then you need to fucking leave! Get the fuck out of my sight. I don't want you here. Your fucking face is pissing me off right now." It's unbelievable, those words slipping past his lips full of aggression. The malice in his voice, the expression on Minho's face, it hurt Jisung so much. Minho cussing him out is not what he would usually do anymore. He is friendly and considerate. At the moment, he is so scary. 

Jisung wants to understand his feelings, he really does, but the words Minho just said cut slices into Jisung's head and filled him in with so much pain. 

"Minho, you're hurting right now. I can't leave you behind..."

"Did you not hear me?! Are you stupid?! I told you to fucking leave!" Minho lost control of himself. One motion and Jisung is damaged. It's been a while since Minho hit him out of anger; it's been months, and now, here is Jisung standing with a shocked and distraught look on his face, staring at Minho with so much pain in his eyes because he slapped him. It's going to be memorable. This moment is a deep wound in his heart, and even if it heals, the scar remains. 

"Don't look at me like that. Now, will you get the fuck out? Go fuck with Hyunjin since you like him. He'd be more than thrilled to get up your ass." 

Minho. 

Is. 

Relentless. 

How can he say such things?

Jisung bites down hard on his bottom lip. He is torn apart and affected by Minho's sharp words. He couldn't breathe here anymore; Minho is staring at him with no ounce of pity in his eyes, something Jisung wanted from him. He hoped that Minho's anger was just because of his loss and not because he viewed Jisung negatively now and didn't love him anymore. 

Jisung looks at him one last time, seeing how the ice in Minho's eyes remains. Wordlessly, the stare forces Jisung away. Forces him to turn away, head right out the door and down the hallway. As he waits for the elevator, guilt consumes him completely, and he feels so horrible for leaving Minho behind there. He needs to help his boyfriend. He wants to, but Minho was precise with his words. He wanted Jisung out. Jisung guesses the only people that will accompany Minho is the police. 

He hopes that the police could investigate well. 

He hopes the police could do something Jisung couldn't - keep Minho safe, comfort him, and be there for Minho while he is grieving. 

The elevator door slides open, Jisung steps in and crashes onto his knees once the doors slide to a close. He is sad, the floor is sad, the elevator is sad. Everything is just so...blue. The happiness the two had right before the appalling incident faded away like smoke. 

He leaves the apartment building that used to be so exciting. Now it quickly converts from happiness to gloom. 

He walks, walks, and walks, and ends up at the bus stop. He sits down on the uncomfortable bench.  _ Uncomfortable _ . He laughs sadly at the memory of Minho, scolding him for sitting on the bench. 

Are they over?

Minho didn't mention about wanting to break up...

He hopes Minho doesn't want to break up with him. If Minho does feel like breaking up with him, then it will crush Jisung completely. He will be more hurt than he is now because Jisung loves Minho despite what the other did and said to him. 

Jisung reaches for his phone in his pocket, taps in the password - unlocking it, and he goes through his contacts and stops at Hyunjin's name. He wants to call him, cry, and tell him everything that just happened. But then quickly turns off his phone and puts it back in his pocket. He didn't want to bother him while he is enjoying his vacation with his family. He shouldn't waste his well-deserved break. 

Jisung leans his head back against the thin transparent wall. He sits there, not knowing who to call, not knowing who to talk to about how horrible he feels right now. Everyone is enjoying their vacation. 

Jisung feels like he is suffocating so much; the thought of Minho yelling at him, telling him that he didn't want to see his face, is causing that suffocation. Minho slapping him makes him feel like trash and disgusted in himself. 

Maybe he should understand? Minho is suffering much more than Jisung. He is dealing with the loss of all three of his cats. Of course, he'd be angry and upset. Of course, he would let it out on Jisung. Of course, Minho would say hateful things and bring Jisung down. Maybe he is too sad to think straight. 

The bus arrives, Jisung gets in, sits in the front, and stares out the window emptily. He doesn't want to go back to his dorm and be alone. He needs someone with him, specifically Hyunjin, he really needs his love and comfort, but then again, he is having fun with his family. He lays the slide of his head against the window and shuts his eyes. 

The face of his brother appears in his mind. It's been a while since they last talked. Maybe he should talk to him. His brother cares so much about him, and he is the only option. Hopefully, he isn't at work right now. 

Jisung arrives in a familiar area. He walks through the familiar area and sees the tall, familiar buildings. He walks until he sees the one he recognizes and steps inside. His brother lives on the twelfth floor, so he takes the elevator there and arrives on that floor. He walks through the clean hallway and ends up in front of his brother's door. 

He rings the bell, and a couple of seconds later, his brother answers the door. He sees Jisung in front of him and smiles so widely, exciting to see him after a while. "Jisung! I missed you so much! How are you doing?"

"Jihoon Hyung..." Jisung mutters, his voice breaking. Jihoon's smile drops just as fast as it appeared, and his eyebrows furrow in worry at the dead look on Jisung's face from all the crying and stress. 

"Is everything okay?" He steps aside, leaving some space for Jisung to step inside. Jisung shakes his head and automatically makes his way over to Jihoon's leather black couch. His older brother closes the door and sits down next to him. "Tell me why you are upset, kiddo."

Jisung spills everything single thing to him through his waterfall-like tears pouring down his cheeks and intense sobbing. He is shaking so much, and Jihoon lets out a sad sigh and rubs Jisung's back before he leaves and heads into his kitchen. He returns with a glass of orange juice and a pastel blue square tissue box. 

"Goodness, I can't believe such a thing happened to him," Jihoon says and combs his fingers through his shiny, smooth black hair. "All three of his cats? It must be so painful for him. Someone must have something against him to kill his pets." Jisung nods, pulls a tissue paper and wipes away his tears. "I know he is upset and hurt, but that doesn't mean he should use that to yell it all out on you...and slap you." 

Jisung doesn't respond, and Jihoon continues anyway. "Jisung, I'm surprised you got yourself a boyfriend. I didn't expect that of you. But I guess you managed to get yourself one, the one that gets angry at you. To me, it seems like he only cares about himself. I think he is abusing you emotionally." 

Emotional abuse? No. Minho doesn't abuse him emotionally. He only did it at the moment; distress watered his happiness and proper judgment. Minho loves Jisung, and he would never usually go too far. 

"Hyung, it was only this one time. I don't think he is abusing me that way. His cats died...he doesn't often yell at me, only when he gets angry at me, but that doesn't happen too often." 

"Jisung. He slapped you out of anger, and you didn't do anything wrong; that's unacceptable." Jihoon sighs. 

"I think I annoyed him, that's why." Jisung frowns. 

Jihoon rolls his eyes. "You're not understanding, kiddo. By the way, did you eat anything yet?" Jisung didn't yet, but he didn't feel like eating. He has no appetite after what happened earlier. 

"I'm not hungry."

"No, no, hungry or not, I'm going to cook you something. Even if you have no appetite, you need to consume something. Not eating will make you feel worse than you are now. I'll cook you something light." Jihoon stands up and steps towards the kitchen, immediately digging in the fridge for some vegetables. Jisung pulls his gaze away from him and lays on his side, hugging himself, trying to make himself feel comfortable somehow. 

No comfort reaches him. Only thoughts do. 

Eventually, his lids get heavy, and he ends up falling asleep. 

\--------

He wakes up when he feels a warm hand resting on his waist. He opens his eyes and sees Minho sitting on the floor in front of him. He is looking right at Jisung, the anger gone in his face, replaced with a relaxed look. Minho smiles at him, removes his hand from Jisung's waist. He lifts his hand, and Jisung flinches. Minho frowns, knowing why he flinched. He touches Jisung's hair and combs it gently. 

Jisung sighs, sit's upright, and sets Minho a confused look. He seems okay now. Is he  _ really _ okay? Or does he feel bad for what he did? 

"Did you sleep well, baby?" Minho asks in a soft voice. 

"How did you get here?" Jisung asks, not bothering to answer Minho's question. 

"Hyunjin told me where you were." 

"Hyunjin? How does he know?"

"Your brother had to leave for work, so he texted Hyunjin everything, then Hyunjin angrily texted me. He is so fucking pissed and wants to beat me up good. I asked him where you are, so he sent me the address and demanded me to apologize to you," Minho explains. 

"Oh," Jisung replies, then sighs, "What about the police? Your cats?"

"The police are at my place investigating. I left after answering their questions." Minho sits down next to Jisung and slides his hand on top of Jisung's. "I'm sorry for yelling at you and cursing. I was so upset because I love my cats so much. They mean a lot to me, and they provide me so much security and comfort when I'm not well. But I shouldn't have let all of my anger off at you. I hurt you so much." 

"Minho, it's okay, I understand." 

Minho cups Jisung's face and rubs the cheek he slapped. "I'm so sorry for hitting you, baby. I shouldn't have let my stupid anger control over me. I shouldn't have even yelled at you. I'm such a jerk." 

"Minho, it's fine. I'm okay now," Jisung assures him. 

Minho shakes his head. "No, it's not fine, sweetie." He presses a kiss on his lips. 

"Are you feeling better?" Jisung asks. 

Minho inhales deeply and looks down at his legs. "No." 

Jisung doesn't reply. He doesn't know what to say. He feels so sad for him but couldn't come up with any comforting words for him. They stick with this empty silence, Jisung trying to figure out what to say, and Minho just sitting quietly, his gaze fixed on his legs as he plays with his fingers. 

Finally, they look at each other. 

"Jisung, I'm scared of myself. I'm afraid of what I will do to you. I get angry easily, and I hurt you. I don't want to hurt you anymore. You deserve happiness, not pain."

"Minho, I said it is okay." 

"I think..." Minho couldn't finish his sentence; he sounds so pained, and he lets out a long sigh and massages his temple. Jisung knows that what he is going to say next isn't going to be so good. "I think we need to break up before any of it gets worse. I thought about it, I thought about how I was behaving towards you, and honestly, I don't deserve someone so sweet like you. You deserve someone so much better." 

Jisung starts crying. Minho doesn't comfort him. Jisung wanted him to, he wanted to feel his warm body warm him up, but Minho just sits there, not doing anything about it, keeping his gaze firmly on Jisung. His words immensely destroyed Jisung. Break up? No way! It shouldn't happen! Jisung couldn't believe him. Doesn't Minho love him so much? He said it so many times. 

"Minho, how dare you say such things like that! Don't you love me?" Jisung sniffles and wipes his nose with his hoodie's sleeve, not bothering to reach over to the tissue box placed on the coffee table. 

"I do love you, Jisung. I love you so much and care about you; that's why I am breaking up with you. I don't want to hurt you anymore. All I do is cause you pain."

"You breaking up with me is hurting me so much right now, Minho!" Jisung shouts and smacks the leather cushion beneath him. "I'm not going to be happy without you." 

Minho scratches the back of his neck apprehensively and sighs. "Hyunjin...he cares about you a lot. He is going to beat me up for you. He is a loyal friend; he respects you, unlike me." 

"What do you mean? What are you trying to say?" 

"Hyunjin is better for you. That's what I am trying to say." 

"Days ago, you were angry that I wanted to stay with Hyunjin in the dorm instead of living with you! You were worried about what Hyunjin and I were doing together! And now, you freely say that Hyunjin and I should be together instead? How can you say such a thing? Why were you so relieved when I told you that Hyunijn and I love each other only as friends then?" 

Minho stands up. "Yes, I was relieved to hear that from you. I was relieved to hear that you and Hyunjin only see each other as friends. It made me feel less insecure and bothered. But I think you two suit each other well. Jisung, you deserve to be around someone who makes you happy." 

"You make me happy, Minho," Jisung says. 

"I'm a monster."

"No, you're not," Jisung says and folds his arms over his chest. 

"Jisung, I love you so much, but think about it, breaking up will be the best for both of us." He turns to leave, Jisung jolts up from the couch and grabs his wrist. 

"Minho, don't leave me please, I'm hurting so much already," he begs, "You can't do this. I love you." 

Minho turns to face him, his eyes filled with tears. "Sorry..." Jisung lets go of his wrist and looks at him pleadingly, hoping Minho would change his mind, admit that he doesn't want to break up. 

"Please, no, I can't live without you, please!" 

Minho turns away and walks away. 

"Minho, I love you, please don't leave!" 

He feels a touch. It isn't Minho's touch; he wishes it were his, that would be so nice, but he is out of the apartment, leaving Jisung here grieving. Jisung blinks awake and sees Hyunjin on the floor in front of him. Okay, at least it's Hyunjin stroking his tear-stained cheek, he wanted Hyunjin, and here he is now. Is this a dream? Jisung isn't out of his dream yet?

"You had a bad dream about Minho. You said his name so many times." Hyunjin kisses Jisung's forehead. "Are you okay?" Jisung shakes his head. 

"He's awake?" He hears Seungmin's voice. Jisung sits upright and rubs his sore eyes. They felt so rough.

"When did you guys come?"

"An hour ago. Your brother texted us, telling us everything. He had to go to work, so here we are, here with you, lovely," Hyunjin says and sits beside him. "Why didn't you text or call me?" 

"I didn't want to ruin your vacation." Jisung starts crying again. He is holding onto so much pain and now feels so remorseful for being the reason why Hyunjin and Seungmin are here with him, sacrificing their vacation. Hyunjin lets out a sigh and slides his hand into Jisung's fading blue locks.

"I would scold you, but you are so upset and hurt. So I am not going to scold you." Hyunjin sighs, combing Jisung's hair gently. "How is telling us what you are going through ruining our vacation? We are your friends. We are always here for you; we care about you."

"Sorry..." Jisung murmurs. 

Hyunjin moves his hand from Jisung's hair, reaches for the napkin on the tissue box, and cleans the tears from Jisung's cheeks. "No, sorry's, Jisung, I'm upset that you didn't tell me what is going on. Tell us how you are feeling right now." 

"Honestly, not so good." Jisung exhales stressfully. "I'm sad...sad that it happened, sad that I annoyed Minho."

"I'll go warm up the food Jihoon Hyung left for him," Seungmin says, Hyunjin nods at him, and Seungmin gets off the couch and heads into the kitchen. 

"Jisung, whenever something happens, whenever you are upset, please tell us, okay? Yes, we are in the middle of our vacation. Yes, we want to have fun, but how is it fun to hear that your best friend is hurting by himself? Hm?" Hyunjin frowns at Jisung.

"I'm sorry, Hyunjin." Jisung looks down when his eyes decide to fill with tears again. 

"Gosh, stop crying," Hyunjin cups Jisung's face and lifts it, then wipes away his tears. He pulls Jisung into a hug, rubbing his back soothingly. Jisung lets out a breath and closes his eyes. 

"Thank you for coming here for me," Jisung mutters. 

"That's what I want to hear. You're welcome," Hyunjin replies and softly laughs. Jisung smiles. 

"Jisung, here is your food, all nice and warm just for you." Seungmin returns with the food and places it on the coffee table. Jisung pulls away from Hyunjin and looks up at Seungmin, giving him a big grateful smile. 

"Thank you, Seungmin." Jisung stands up and hugs the younger. 

Seungmin pats him on the back. "Eat the food before it gets cold again."

Jisung sits back down, but he doesn't eat yet. "Did you guys eat anything yet?"

"I did. My last meal was dinner." Hyunjin giggles. 

Seungmin snorts. "Honestly, I'm pretty hungry. How about you, Hyunjin?" 

"Yes, very," Hyunjin replies, "Should we order some food?" 

"Yes, it sounds good to me, we can eat together and watch something together, would you like that, Jisung?" Seungmin asks. 

"Yes!" Jisung smiles. 

"Seungmin, hurry, order food for us!" 

"Why me?" Seungmin grunts. 

"Because you're the youngest here." Hyunjin cackles. 

"You're the oldest you should do it," Seungmin retorts. 

"I'll do it," Jisung offers.

"No, it's fine. I'll do it," Seungmin smiles, "Jisung, quickly eat the food your brother made before more comes in." 

"Okay."

Seungmin orders food, and it arrives in half an hour. While eating, they watch a film on Jihoon's TV, and it really did keep Jisung's mind off of things. It isn't only the movie and delicious food that helped with it. His friend's presence helped so much. Because of Seungmin and Hyunjin, he feels so warm and light now. 

When night came by, the three boys headed into the guest bedroom. On the right side of the bed, lies Seungmin and on the left is Hyunjin. Between the two of them is Jisung. 

"Tomorrow, Hyunjin and I have a mission, and it is to confront Minho," Seungmin speaks, "Do you want to come with us?" Jisung wants to say no. His heart rate is already escalating in nervousness from hearing that. He is so afraid of going back there, scared that Minho will get exasperated at Jisung's appearance again. 

But Seungmin and Hyunjin will be there will him, so it'll be alright...right?

"Sure, I'm scared, but I'll come," Jisung answers. Hyunjin throws his arm over Jisung's chest. 

"Don't be scared. Seungmin and I are now your bodyguards, right Seungmin?" 

"Yeah, we will protect you, we will be there for you," Seungmin replies. 

"I love you guys, thank you so much," Jisung smiles and turns to his side to face Seungmin. He snuggles in closer to the younger boy.

"I love you too," Seungmin softly replies to him and pokes Jisung on the nose. 

"Love you, Jisung." Hyunjin rolls to his side as well, his chin on Jisung's head. 

\--------

Jisung's older brother drops the three of them off in front of Minho's apartment building. When they head inside the dreaded apartment building, fear begins to settle its way inside Jisung, and he feels so guilty for feeling this fear. Minho is his boyfriend; he isn't supposed to be afraid of him - that's what Jisung tries to inform himself but is it helping him? Not much at all. 

The closer he gets to the door, the fear builds up inside of him more and more. As if Hyunjin senses Jisung's stabbing feelings, he holds onto his hand. "It's okay, Jisung, we are here for you." Jisung forces a small smile at him as a reply. He still feels scared. 

"Ass kicking time!" Seungmin declares and knocks on the door intensely. They wait for Minho to answer, but several seconds pass quietly and with no answer. Seungmin knocks again, even harder this time, still no response. "Shit...he isn't opening." 

"Um, I know the passcode. I always watch Minho enter it," Jisung says and bites onto his bottom lip. Seungmin steps aside for Jisung, and Hyunjin lets go of his hand. Jisung's hand shook as he approaches the keypad of the lock. Then his legs begin to shake. "I can't..." he drops his hand, Hyunjin is quick to grab it. 

"That's okay. Will you tell me the code?" Seungmin asks. 

Jisung tells him the code, and Seungmin enters it in. Successfully the door unlocks. The three of them step inside, and Jisung widens his eyes at the huge mess in the apartment. Fragments of glass are scattered, ripped pieces of paper are everywhere, and on the couch is a messy Minho, with his legs pulled to his chest, staring blankly straight ahead. It looks like he threw a tantrum and is now exhausted. 

"Holy shit..." Hyunjin mutters and squeezes Jisung's hand tight. 

"Minho, what the fuck happened here?" Seungmin asks, approaching Minho discreetly. Minho doesn't answer, and when Seungmin tries to meet his eyes, the older boy turns his head away. Seungmin spins to Hyunjin and Jisung and shrugs. 

"Minho, hello, are you here?" Hyunjin tries this time. No response. 

Slowly, Minho turns his head and looks right at Jisung. There is no emotion in his eyes; he is empty. Jisung is worried about him, he wants to comfort him, but he knows what will happen in return from Minho- anger. 

The older boy drags down his eyes, and he stares at Jisung's hand, the one held by Hyunjin, then looks at Hyunjin. Now the emotion in his gaze settles in quickly. There is a jealous sting to those eyes and a lot of anger.

"I see you are quick to attach yourself to Hyunjin. You listened to me well, didn't you?" Minho speaks dangerously deep. Jisung squeezes Hyunjin's hand. The taller boy glances at Jisung and then leans close to his ear and whispers, "You okay?" Jisung shakes his head. 

Hyunjin looks at Minho. "Ah, what did you tell Jisung?  _ Hyunjin _ will be more than thrilled to get up Jisung's ass? Hmm, I think you are right~." If Hyunjin is trying to piss Minho off, then it is working well. Minho looks twice as angry. His mouth is in a hard line, and his eyebrows are drawing close together. However, the fearless Hyunjin doesn't stop. "Hehe, I like Jisung a lot. I wonder how his ass feels like." 

Seungmin steps towards Hyunjin and gives him a look of disbelief. "Hyunjin, stop acting up. It isn't funny." 

"I'm not acting up," Hyunjin fake-innocently replies and turns to Jisung. He places his hands on Jisung's waist and moves close to his ears. "Let's see if Minho means his stupid words." Hyunjin ends his sentence by licking Jisung's ear, causing chills to graze on the younger. Hyunjin moves down to his neck and kisses there. Jisung squirms uncomfortably and closes his eyes.

"You fucking shit!" Minho growls. Hyunjin quickly pulls away from Jisung and snaps his head towards Minho, who drops his feet to the floor and stands up. He storms over to the two, grabs Hyunjin by the collar, and inches his face close to Hyunjin's. "Why the fuck did you do that to Jisung?" 

"Because I can," Hyunjin retorts and gives him a sly smirk. "Do you have a problem with that? I thought he is with me now." 

" _ Hyunjin _ ," Seungmin warns, not that Hyunjin listened. 

"Hyunjin, I think you should listen to your wise friend right there. You really are acting up and pissing me off. I want to fucking kill you. You made Jisung uncomfortable." 

Hyunjin shifts his gaze to Jisung. "Did I make you uncomfortable? Tell me the truth." 

Jisung shakes his head, only because he didn't want to make Hyunjin feel bad.

"Jisung, you are a fucking cheater!" Minho lets go of Hyunjin and flips to Jisung, and angrily shoves him to the ground. Seungmin rushes to Jisung's side and lifts him from the floor, and stands in front of him protectively. "Did you like it? Tell me you don't feel anything for him!" 

"Minho, you are so fucked up," Seungmin says. 

"Oh, I didn't know that," Minho sarcastically remarks and rolls his eyes. He looks at Jisung, who is hiding behind Seungmin. "Answer me. Do you feel anything or not?"

Jisung couldn't assure Minho that he didn't feel anything for Hyunjin because his throat swelling makes it impossible to respond. He tries not to let himself cry, but tears well up in his eyes, and he couldn't hold in the large burdensome stacks of pain any longer and lets his sobs rip its way out of his trembling body. 

Hyunjin steps in front of Minho and slaps him on the face. "Asshole. Jisung isn't a cheater. You're the one who told him to fuck with me. If you hate it when I touch Jisung, then why did you tell him that?" Minho doesn't answer, and Hyunjin slaps Minho once again but harder. "This is what you get for hitting Jisung and treating him like shit. I get it. Your precious cats died; you love them. But you're actions are so fucked up. Jisung loves you, and he wanted to comfort you, but what did you do? You turned to him and said so many hurtful things and slapped him on the face." 

"I don't need his fucking comfort," Minho growls. Jisung cries harder. Seungmin swiftly spins to him and pulls him into a tight hug. 

"And he doesn't need your shitty attitude," Seungmin snaps back. "Let's get the fuck out of here. I don't want to beat Minho up anymore or even look at him." Seungmin releases Jisung and holds onto his hand, pulling him towards the door. Hyunjin follows right behind the two. 

They were about to head out the door, but Minho's voice stops them, "Jisung, tell me you don't love Hyunjin." 

An unpleasant feeling twists in Jisung's stomach, but he turns around to look at Minho anyway. "I don't, Minho. I love you." 

"Then come here, if you love me."

Hyunjin looks at Minho as well. "What the fuck?! Jisung doesn't like me that way. He still loves your shitty ass. Why are you so insecure and doubting Jisung's love for you? He was upset all yesterday and said that he understood why you were angry at him. Yet, you think he doesn't love you. You're a fucking shit, that's all I got to say. Come on, Jisung, don't waste your time over that fucker." 

"Jisung, if you truly love me, then come here to me." 

Jisung looks at Hyunjin, who shakes his head. "Don't."

"That shit..." Seungmin mutters angrily. "Jisung, don't listen to him. Come back to him until he is completely okay. He isn't in his right mind right now." 

"Don't listen to what they are saying, Jisung. Are you going to listen to me,  _ your boyfriend _ , the one you love, or are you going to listen to your friends?"

"Shut the fuck up, Minho!" Seungmin shouts and nudges Jisung trying to force him out, but Jisung stays in place, staring intensely at Minho, who is staring the same way back. 

Minho ignores him. "Come here. If you don't come here, then it means you don't love me." 

"You manipulative ass bitch!" Hyunjin nearly screeches, his fists balling at his sides. 

Minho laughs fakely and then smirks. "Manipulative? You are so funny. Do you think I'm like your ex? Jeongin? Are you still worked over him? I'm not manipulative. You are just stupid. Honestly, I think I understand how Jeongin feels now. I feel the same. I don't like it when you are around Jisung. Sometimes I just want to rip you two apart, take him away from you." Jisung's heart drops at his statement. 

"Really?" Hyunjin replies, his voice getting brittle. "You are the cruelest ever." 

"I know~," Minho replies, "Now Jisung, come here."

Jisung pulls away from Seungmin's hand and walks over to the now satisfied Minho. "I love you, Minho. Only you."

"I love you too, baby," Minho replies and places his hands on Jisung's waist and pulls him closer to him. His eyes show hunger; it's a good thing, but Jisung doesn't want to be his food under this circumstance. Maybe another time? Minho kisses Jisung firmly and hungrily. This kiss doesn't show love at all, or at least to Jisung. He doesn't feel so loved under this touch. Minho's tongue enters Jisung's mouth; he tastes so foul and unpleasant. Jisung feels like throwing up. 

Then he moves down to his neck and kisses on the spots Hyunjin left his kisses. "You are mine. Don't be around Hyunjin if you love me. Will you do that for me?" His hands move to Jisung's ass, and he squeezes it firmly. 

Jisung widens his eyes. "Minho, let's stop." Minho doesn't stop and begins sucking on his skin. 

"Minho! Get off of him!" Seungmin shouts. Minho doesn't listen and slips one hand underneath Jisung's shirt, making him let out a whimper. "I said, get off of him!" Seungmin grabs Minho by the hair, making Minho wince in pain, and he launches him away from Jisung. 

"Jisung, are you okay?" Hyunjin lifts Jisung from the floor, and the younger hugs Hyunjin, grabbing fistfuls of the fabric of Hyunjin's plain white shirt and cries on his shoulder. 

"Jisung, I told you not to be around him!" Jisung shuts his eyes at Minho's yell. 

"Oh, shut up!" Seungmin says. "Eat this!" Jisung widens his eyes, cuts away from Hyunjin, and looks over at Minho, who has his hand over his nose. That injury is enough, but Seungmin doesn't stop and kicks Minho on the side of his body.

"Stop, Seungmin, that's enough!" Jisung shouts. 

Seungmin stops, and Minho removes his hand from his bleeding nose and tries to stand up, but lands back on his butt. He scrunches his face; tears accumulate in his eyes, and he lets out a piercing cry. Seungmin looks confused as fuck, Hyunjin looks concerned, very concerned, and Jisung rushes to Minho and kneels beside him. 

"I don't know what's wrong with me! I'm so crazy! Why must bad things happen to me? I can't deal with so much! Someone is after me. They always taunt me; I was hiding that from you, Jisung. They are ruthless enough to ruin my life by killing what I love!" Minho wails. Jisung wraps his arms around him; the older boy presses his face onto Jisung's chest. "My life is a fucking mess! I'm losing so much control over myself, and I don't know what to do anymore! I'm so scared." 

"Minho, your life isn't a mess. We can help you," Jisung says softly and kisses the top of his head. Suddenly Minho stops crying, and Jisung feels him go slack in his arms. "Minho?" Minho starts gagging, and he rips away from Jisung and vomits on the floor. 

"Ewwww!" Hyunjin screeches.

"Drank too much," Minho mutters before he lays down on the floor. "Tired." Is that why his mouth tasted so horrible? He has been drinking away his sorrows, not that the sorrows went away - Jisung sighs. Minho really is a mess right now. 

"How much did you drink?" Seungmin furrows his brows in concern. 

Minho doesn't respond; he turns to his side and falls into a slumber. 

"Let's clean this place up and scold Minho when he is sober. He isn't going to remember what we told him and what he told us," Seungmin says, "I'll find the broom and clean his livingroom up. You two put him to bed." 

"Alrighty," Hyunjin says, and they get to work. 


	27. A bond that won't break

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry again! This time I'm two weeks late into updating :(( A lot happened the past two weeks. The first week didn't go well for me; something happened that took a toll on me mentally and drained my motivation to write this chapter and do assignments. The next week I thought it would turn out better, but it didn't because I ended up getting sick, but I tried to write little by little each of those days. This chapter was so hard to write, especially a particular part because of the way I felt. But here it is; it's not too long (probably the shortest chapter in this entire story) because I didn't want to delay anymore and just publish already haha. I hope you enjoy this chapter and let me know if there are any grammar mistakes or if there is anything I should fix here because I only read over it once

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Mentions of Suicide, Suicide attempt

Minho wakes up from his amble sleep. Upon sitting up, extreme pain strikes him, and he winces deeply, sucking in a breath. The pain is everywhere- okay, maybe not everywhere, but it feels like everywhere because it's his head, nose, and face that hurts - the pain is fucking brutal. Did he foolishly stumble while he was drunk? Minho hoped the fuck not, though the hurt all around tells him that it is likely that he did stumble around. He regrets drinking whatever amount of strong Soju he drank. It led to disastrous consequences. 

Too lazy to get his phone resting on his nightstand to check the time, he automatically concludes that it is still night because of how dark his room is. He stretches out his arms while softly groaning and turns his head to the side; the moonlight is so bright it's soaking through his pale curtain. 

When he turns back his head, he gasps at the figure by his bedside. He focuses on the head, and by the dry looking hair, Minho concludes it is Jisung. He is in an uncomfortable-looking position - kneeling by Minho's bedside, his arms folded over the mattress, and his head is resting over his arms - if he stays like that, he will likely wake up with pain. So, Minho, wanting to be the good boyfriend he was, decides to get out of bed, delicately pick up the sleeping boy and gently place him down on the mattress. Jisung sighs and rolls to his side, his back now facing Minho. 

Minho wanders to the other side and peers at Jisung's face. He came back here...why? Even after the harsh things Minho said to him. Even after all the yelling and cursing, demanding him away - Jisung still came back. Minho's heart starts searing; he doesn't deserve him. 

He lays on his side with his head propped with his hand. Jisung looks so serene as he sleeps. Minho touches Jisung's lips with the tip of his finger and traces around the soft pink skin. 

Jisung doesn't deserve someone so cruel. 

His dark thoughts run around, and the worth he no longer feels in himself causes tears to accumulate in his eyes. Minho drags his hand back away from Jisung's lips. He shouldn't even touch him. Why touch someone he doesn't deserve?

His tears travel down his cheeks and drip onto the pillow below. He didn't mean anything he did or said to him - it was the anger controlling the tip of his tongue. Minho is extremely sorry about what he has done to his (possible) ex-boyfriend. Would Jisung want to date a relentless dirt-bag?

He shuts his eyes, grits his jaw as his chest starts to get heavy. Quickly he rolls onto his back and presses his hand against his mouth to stifle in the unwanted sobs. Jisung shouldn't wake up to a crying, worthless disaster. 

Not only is he a disaster, but his life is also an immense fucking disaster. 

Minho is damaged, way beyond repair- there is no possible repair. He is done with himself, his life, and is detached from whatever inch of happiness left in him, no longer wanting to access it. He doesn't want happiness. 

Everything shattered like glass once he opened the door to his apartment, the pieces descending over and around him pathetically. Those are the pieces that can never be fixed. His cats' death devastated him, destroyed him, tore his insides apart. He couldn't believe any of it, but all that was before his eyes were all real. 

Not only was he so upset, but he was also so angry at the person who did that to his innocent cats. Why did the person have to pick out his cats and kill them? 

He felt extreme fucking wrath, a wrath that burned so hard inside of him that he lost a sense of control of himself. He lashed out at Jisung once the younger boy put his hand on his shoulder. Minho didn't want his touches, he wanted him to leave, but Jisung wouldn't leave. No matter how many times he told him to leave, Jisung remained glued in place, looking at Minho with sadness and worry, which Minho didn't yearn for. He wanted to be alone in his gloom-filled, pathetic apartment, and cry all by himself. Jisung could return once Minho is calm.

He is so regretful for hurting his boyfriend, who has such a kind soul. Minho knows Jisung wanted to take care of him and be by his side, but Minho grew weary of telling Jisung to leave, and he responded by slapping him on the face - a way to pry him away faster. Minho regretted it almost instantly, and the pained look on Jisung's face added more regret. 

Minho's mind is sitting in its dark place; he is tired. Drained to the core. 

He lets out a soft sigh at the thoughts and turns away. He needs to do something about this fucking self-induced headache of his. He leaves his bedroom and heads straight towards his kitchen. 

He opens his fridge, takes out a bottle of water, places it on the counter, and finds his pain medication in the wall cabinet next to the refrigerator. Minho holds the bottle firmly and then twists it around his hand. He stops after a few seconds and starts rubbing his thumb up and down the cylinder container with thoughts. The medication is strong; the usual effects kick in in less than thirty minutes. 

He closes his eyes; everything is just so meaningless. The cats he adored died in the hands of a ruthless, inhuman person. Tearing him from his happiness. There really is nothing to live for anymore. Should he just die?

Minho sits down, pressing his back against the cabinet, staring blankly straight ahead. He shakes the bottle, hearing the clattering of the pills. He lets out a sigh, squeezing his eyes shut. His heart is clutching, sweat gathers on his skin, his breaths get rapid. 

Jisung stares at Minho one last time, the pain immense in his eyes, and he swerves away, leaving Minho's apartment. When the door closes, Minho slumps to his knees, his hand firm on the floor, tears pouring out. He fucked up, big time. And he broke Jisung's trust, and Minho broke that one promise, the promise that he'd never hurt Jisung. 

After a minute of crying hard, he lifts himself, his body quivering as he steps back towards his cats. He notices something on the coffee table, a paper with a paragraph written on it. He drags himself there and picks up the sheet. 

'I read that one entry in your diary, saying that you love your cats so much and they make you happy. You wrote a whole lot about your cats, and just by that, I could tell that they mean the world to you. Guess I had to take them away because you took something away from me. The cats looked so scared, and I should've taken a picture them it for you. It was hard trying to kill them. After killing the first one, the other two ran away, but I caught them anyway and gave them a good couple of stabs. It's what you deserve, Lee Minho. Have fun cleaning up your mess, and enjoy the rest of your days. There is so much more coming up.' 

Minho stares at the paper, rocks filling in his chest, and soon his sobs break out of him. 

He screams, crumbles up the paper, and tosses it aside, not caring where it landed. He crashes onto his knees and grabs his hair, tugging the strands harshly, ripping out so many. 

Tears stream out of his eyes at that reminder. He opens the cap of the container and peers inside. Well, shit, there aren't enough pills to kill him; there is enough to harm his organs, though. He stands up, takes out one pill, puts in his mouth, and washes it down with the cold water. 

Then he returns the pill container to the cabinet and puts the half-finished water bottle in his fridge.

He drags out one of the cabinet drawers where his kitchen utensils are and obtains a razor blade. He lets out a sigh, lowers the sharp edge towards his wrist, and inhales sharply. Hastily he slashes across his wrist, the stinging sensation coming in immediately along with the blood flowing out of the deep gash. 

Minho watches as the blood flows out quickly, the crimson peppering onto the floor. His vision is beginning to fog, his body growing weak. He hears a loud gasp and thundering steps, and a cry of his name before he goes completely limp. The last thing he feels is desperate hands shaking him. 

\--------

Minho wakes up again; he feels a pain hit in his head. His eyes flutter open, and he furrows his brows at the annoyingly bright light. Remorse overfills him when he realizes that he is in the hospital, alive. 

Minho turns his head to the monitor that shows his vital signs. The numbers shown on the screen indicate that he is in good shape - he doesn't like those numbers. He doesn't want to be in good shape; he wants to be in bad condition and preferably dead. What is there to live for at this point? He messed up. 

Minho turns his head to the other side and sees Hyunjin and Seungmin lounging on the chairs against the walls. Hyunjin's eyes bore onto Minho's, his expression empty, making it impossible for Minho to conceive his emotions. Minho decides to look at Seungmin instead and observe his feelings. He seems either frustrated or very anxious. His head is lowered, and he is picking at the fabric of his jeans. 

"Where is Jisung?" Minho asks; Seungmin raises his head but doesn't look at Minho. He stares at Hyunjin instead, and it makes Minho a tad bit upset - Seungmin seems mad at him. 

"In the hallway," Hyunjin answers coldly, his eyes bitter cold ice. Minho manages to decipher Hyunjin's anger with the tone of his voice. "He is crying out there. That's what he has been doing for the past two hours. Crying and blaming himself when all of this is your fault!"

"Hyunjin, don't be so rude to him. Minho isn't well and just woke up," Seungmin scolds the tall boy, who disregards Seungmin's words with the roll of his eyes. 

Minho sighs, even more feelings of guilt joining in with the others plaguing his heart. He wanted to ask him if he could see Jisung but decides not to ask. Both of them are radiating anger. 

Somehow already bored, Minho pulls down the white-colored blanket and grimaces when he sees that he is in soft hospital scrubs. He lifts his injured wrist, and the bandage wrapped around his wrist and hand upsets him much more. "They patched me up?"

This question afflicted something in Hyunjin, making tears form in his eyes. Not seeming to be in the condition to answer, Seungmin takes in a breath and answers for him instead. "Yes, they patched you up. You lost so much blood, so they had to do a blood transfusion to save you." 

"Wow, it sounds like I am fine now." Minho shrugs. "Will I be able to leave?" 

"You will definitely be able to leave," Seungmin solely replies, pauses briefly, and continues, "After the doctor comes here to check in with you, the hospital staff will transport you elsewhere." 

"What the fuck! Where?!" Minho sits upright without ripping his gaze from Seungmin. 

"You will be transported to the psychiatric hospital. It's best for you, Minho." 

"Again?" Minho's voice breaks out, and his eyes fill with tears at the thought of being there again for days. He didn't like it there and didn't want to be there again. The outcome will just be the same as before. All he will think about there is about nothing else but leaving. "You told them what happened, didn't you?!" 

"They asked us questions, and we told them everything," Hyunjin finally speaks, "You should get treatment in your case. If you don't, you might feel worse. We care about you, Minho, and want you to get better."

"We care about you and want you to get better," Minho mimics bitterly, "How is tattle-tailing going to make me feel better? Why did you have to answer their fucking questions?! What goes on in my life is none of their business. My suffocations shouldn't matter to any of you! I will deal with it on my own."

"You sure are dealing with it just fine," Hyunjin sarcastically replies; Seungmin shoots him a glare and lightly smacks him on the arm. 

Minho turns away from them and focuses on the monitor. He wishes for all the numbers to turn to zero right now! All of them! "Let's not be friends anymore," he says exasperatedly. He feels so betrayed. 

"Fine by me," Hyunjin snorts, "You are not going to like me anymore anyway. I did something horrible-" 

"Don't tell him now," Seungmin cuts in, "Tell him when he feels better." 

"Tell me what?" Minho swiftly spins his head towards their direction.

"We will tell you when it's the right time," Seungmin responds. 

"Now is the right time," Minho says, frantic to hear what horrible thing Hyunjin claimed he did. Seungmin shakes his head no, it's going to be challenging to force it out of him. Minho isn't going to give up. He wants the words. "Tell me now. I don't give a fuck if it's the right time or not." 

Seungmin and Hyunjin look at each other momentarily, Seungmin nods, and they both look back at Minho. 

"I kissed Jisung yesterday," Hyunjin states. 

"You wouldn't," Minho seethes. He couldn't bring himself to believe Hyunjin words, but something within sounded so believable. Why does he feel that they actually did? Minho's heart crushes at that thought. 

"On the neck," Seungmin adds as if it would pick Minho up. 

"And why would you do that?" Minho glares at Hyunjin; the glare tenses Hyunjin up.

"I was angry at you," Hyunjin replies, "I've been told everything that happened between you two, and it made me so angry. The cruel things you did and said to him hurt him, Minho. Your emotions shouldn't enable you to hit Jisung and say things that affected him so much. Why the fuck would you tell him to go fuck with me? Is that how you speak to someone who loves you so much?-" Hot tears spill out of Minho's eyes "-And me being happy to get up his ass? Completely false. I have no feelings for Jisung. I'm not any better either, though." Hyunjin sighs deeply. "My anger inflicted me to prove you wrong, prove that you wouldn't want Jisung being with me- so I kissed him on the neck, which angered you so much yesterday. I'm sorry about what I did."

"Hyunjin, I'm disappointed in you," Minho says, wipes away his tears, and grits his teeth.

"I'm disappointed in me too."

"Did you make Jisung uncomfortable when you kissed him there?"

"I don't know, I even asked Jisung, and he shook his head no. It seemed like he was uncomfortable. He looked unhappy," Hyunjin admits. 

"You and Jisung are over," Minho announces coldly. "I don't trust you two to be friends with each other." 

Hyunjin looks taken aback. "What do you mean? Why don't you trust us together?" 

"You kissed him on the neck, made him uncomfortable, and I don't like you anymore," Minho replies grimly and turns his face away from the two. "Bring Jisung here." 

"I don't know...I don't think he is okay right now, especially after seeing you bleeding out and almost dying back at your apartment. He thought he was going to lose you," Seungmin says frailly.

"Please, bring him here. I need to see him," Minho implores.

"Minho, he isn't in-" Minho lifts his hospital shirt to pull off the wires that are attached to his skin. "Minho, don't do that!" Seungmin shouts, not that Minho listened. Once the stupid cables are gone from his skin, he gets out of the hospital bed. Seungmin and Hyunjin stand up with attentiveness and worry, but Minho lifts a pointer finger at them, stopping them, and he moves to the door. 

Just as he is about to touch the handle, the handle starts moving, and he retracts his hand quickly. He steps back as the door opens, his heart pounding, hoping it isn't the Doctor. He doesn't want to get any treatment, the bandage around his hand and wrist is enough, and he feels that he is fine, despite being completely broken on the inside. However, it isn't the Doctor that steps inside. It's Jisung, whose eyes are worryingly blood-shot and puffy from the crying. He looks so damaged. 

"Hyunjin, Seungmin, you guys can go home now," Jisung says to them, sorrowfully. "Enjoy your vacation." 

"Jisung..." Hyunjin mutters. 

"Please," Jisung begs, giving the two boys a pleading look. 

"We can't enjoy our-"

"I'll call you when something happens or if I need your help. I want to be alone with Minho."

"I hate to say this, but okay. It's what you want, and I'll respect that. Please take care of yourself and Minho well, and do call us." Seungmin hugs Jisung tightly and releases him quickly. Hyunjin tries to hug Jisung too, but he seems to remember Minho's words and waves goodbye to him before brushing past him and heading out - Seungmin following after him. 

Jisung steps to Minho, lifts his injured wrist, and breaks down, sobbing profoundly. Minho frowns and pulls the younger boy close to his body, wraps his arms around his small waist, and kisses the top of his head before resting his chin on his shoulder. "I'm so sorry for everything. I'm sorry for being such a shitty person to you." 

Jisung doesn't respond, parts from Minho forcibly, and peers at his face painfully through his tear-filled eyes, his eyebrows drawing together in despair. He places his hands on Minho's cheeks. "Minho, it's all okay, it's okay that you yelled at me, you were dealing with so much, and I understand your pain, but please don't leave me, okay?" Jisung whimpers; then, he drops his hands from Minho's face and descends onto his knees and wraps his arms around his thighs, nuzzling the side of his head against Minho's thighs. "I love you."

Minho pulls of Jisung's arms and kneels in front of him. "I love you too, baby." He kisses his forehead, then the tip of his nose, and presses several around Jisung's cheek, the one he hit. "I'm sorry for hurting you."

"I forgive you." Jisung presses a kiss against Minho's lips, and Minho grabs Jisung before he could pull away, deepening their kiss. Jisung moans into Minho's mouth, his arms wrapping around Minho's neck. 

The two finally part from each other. "I want to get out of here now." Minho stands up abruptly - followed by Jisung - and immediately begins to feel dizzy. Jisung grabs him before he could stumble. 

"Careful," he says and lets go of him. "Are you sure you want to leave? The Doctor needs to discuss your treatment plans and send you to the psychiatric hospital. I think you should get help." 

"Jisung, I'm okay." Minho finds his clothes and removes his hospital scrubs. "I don't need help from random people I don't know and don't want to see them. I have you, I love you." 

"If you have me, then why did you try to die?" Jisung raises a brow. 

Minho's face heats a little in shame. "Because I was guilty about what I did, I feel so sad, and I even broke a promise I made. The one about not hurting you." He finishes changing into his clothes and holds onto Jisung's hand. 

"Anger happens, Minho. It isn't something that can be avoided. I know you want to be the best for me and make me happy, but we don't always have to be sturdy around each other. If we fall, we can bring each other up." 

"I want to be better for you," Minho says, pulling Jisung with him to the door, wanting to leave this place desperately, "Starting now."


	28. Turning Away

On the bed, they lay comfortably together, staring at each other's faces and smiling. Jisung drags his gaze down to Minho's pretty pink lips, then up to his sharp, perfect nose and stops at his sparkling dark eyes. Instinctively he licks his bottom lip, earning a soft chuckle from his boyfriend. Minho moves closer to Jisung and nears his lips to Jisung's. 

"You're beautiful," Minho says softly. His fingers meet with the strands of Jisung's hair, and he runs his fingers through them. Jisung only hums as a reply and closes his eyes from the satisfaction coming from the touch. "Is it okay if I kiss you?"

Jisung opens his eyes and gives Minho a deadpan look. For the past week, Jisung had to deal with Minho asking permission to kiss him. It isn't Minho's fault that he is practically traumatized by what he did and doesn't trust himself anymore.

Jisung told Minho about what he did while he was drunk. Minho didn't take it well and tossed thousands of apologizes towards Jisung, who frantically said it was okay. 

"Minho, I've told you this several times already, you can kiss me and don't even need to ask me. I love it when you kiss me, so please do," Jisung responds, and Minho nods and carefully presses his lips against his. And that's how they remain for a few seconds, their lips pressed together, no movement and no sliding of the tongues together. It's like kissing for the first time ever; there is so much awkwardness into it. Jisung pulls away, and Minho gives him a remorseful look. "Don't give me that look." 

"Sorry," Minho mutters. 

"Are you still upset about what happened?" 

Minho nods. 

"Don't be upset. It's okay. Look, I'm not bothered by it at all." Jisung tries to assure. "So, please, don't be hesitant about kissing or touching me." 

Jisung grabs Minho's hand, kisses his knuckle, and moves upwards. He lifts the sleeve of Minho's T-Shirt and kisses around his bicep. This makes Minho let out a small breath, causing Jisung to smile at him and roll him on flat on his back. 

Jisung hovers over him, grabs the hem of Minho's shirt, and lifts it exposing his stomach and chest. Just by staring at it, Jisung feels his breath hitch and his heart rate pick up. Is it the same for Minho? Jisung presses his ear against Minho's chest and hears the thundering of his heart. He smiles.

He lifts his head and plants a kiss down onto his chest. Minho grabs Jisung's by the waist and swaps their positions so that Jisung is flat on the mattress. 

What Jisung expects is for Minho to quickly take off his clothes, kiss him everywhere,  _ devour _ him. What he got instead is Minho looking down at him, with the water shimmering in his eyes and dripping onto Jisung's face. 

"Minho, what's wrong?" Jisung asks in concern. 

"You are making my heartthrob so much," Minho replies and crashes his lips onto Jisung's, kissing him desperately, their tongues eventually battling against each other, mixing each other's salivas. 

\--------

"You can go. I'll wait for you here in the car," Jisung says as Minho unbuckles from his seat. 

Minho halts and turns to Jisung. "Jisung, sweetie, come with me. I don't want you to be out here in my car alone." Jisung nods as a response, open his door, and exits Minho's car. The two walk inside the therapy center together and approach the front desk. Minho checks in, and then the two find available seats and sit down together.

"I'm so nervous about this." Minho nervously chuckles and scratches the back of his neck. 

"It'll be okay. Once you're done, feel free to tell me about how it went, yeah?" Jisung places a hand over Minho's. 

"Definitely will, baby." Minho smiles. 

Eventually, Minho's therapist approaches him, it stiffens him, but he immediately loosens right after because of the friendly expression on her face. "Nice to meet you. I'm Kim Minji. I'll lead you right inside. Follow me." 

Minho stands up, ruffles Jisung's hair with a little smile on his face before turning to leave. Jisung smiles as he watches Minho follow after his therapist. He is so happy for him. After tons of convincing, Minho finally gave in and decided to give professional help a shot. 

Jisung slides his phone from out of his pocket. He decides to watch something to occupy himself and let the time fly quickly. 

A few minutes in, and he is no longer focusing on the drama anymore. He places his phone on his lap and tilts his head back, knocking it against the wall. Embarrassed, he leans forward a bit.

"Are you okay? It looks like you hit it pretty bad." He turns his head over at the front desk lady who is peering at Jisung with concern. 

"Yeah, I'm fine," he says and nods at her. The lady releases a little laugh before she returns to typing away. 

Jisung sighs and looks at the wall across from him. Minho starts invading his mind, and Jisung places in so many anxieties. Even if he managed to convince him to get therapy, he fears that Minho will come back, not liking it. He wonders how it is going for Minho at the moment. Is he enjoying it? Is it any help? 

_ Argh! Stop thinking, stop thinking! Just ask him when he returns!  _ Jisung scolds himself within his mind. 

What pulls him out of his thoughts is a person with a pastel pink short-sleeved shirt and black jeans. Jisung can recognize this person right off the bat. Jeongin.

Much to Jisung's melancholy, Jeongin approaches him and sits down at the empty seat next to him - previously occupied by Minho for only around a few minutes - Jisung tenses up so much, coldness hurrying to him. 

"Hi," Jeongin says meekly. 

"Hi," Jisung replies, just as meekly. 

"Are you waiting for your turn?" 

"No, I'm just waiting for Minho."  _ No way! _ A casual conversation? With Jeongin?! Impossible! Jeongin doesn't even appear hateful and crude; he literally sounds so collected, like they never fought. This is kind of suspicious...

"Um, is it okay if you can come outside with me to talk?" Jeongin asks. 

Jisung looks at him to spot an expression; what he sees is nothing but sadness within the orbs. The pity-bringing practically pleading look is enough for Jisung to nod and stand up even though he wasn't fond of talking to him. 

They head outside, and Jeongin looks around. It's a little suspicious - why does he need to look around? When Jeongin's eyes stop at Jisung's, Jisung decides to question his behavior verbally, just to be safe. "Why are you looking around like that?" 

"To see if anyone is around." Jeongin sighs. "I am not going to hurt you if that's what you are thinking. I just want to talk to you, but not here in front of this building. I feel awkward standing here. Do you know if there is any park nearby or at least somewhere to sit?" 

"No idea," Jisung replies. He takes out his phone and opens up the map application, and searches for a park. He ends up finding one not too far away from where he is and shows it to Jeongin. Jeongin lets out a breath of relief, and they start walking. 

"It has a playground, cool," Jeongin states and heads to the swings. He sits on one, and Jisung sits on the other. 

They both are silent - Jisung remains still while Jeongin lightly swings back and forth - it's a silence that Jisung urgently wants to escape. 

Jeongin finally breaks this awkward silence. "You should text Minho and tell him where you are." 

"Yeah," Jisung responds. He texts Minho, telling him that he is away with Jeongin. He doesn't need to share his location as they already inputted each other's live location on their phones. Jisung puts his phone on his lap, only to have it slide off and fall onto the blue rubber surface below his feet. He mentally curses to himself, picks it up, and puts it in his front pocket. "So, what is it that you need to talk to me about?" 

"How is Hyunjin?" It seems like he still cares about him, even after what happened. He truly loves him. 

"Hyunjin is fine," Jisung replies. 

"That's good to hear." Jeongin sighs - it didn't sound like a one of relief; it's more like a sigh of deep agony - a sigh showing how sad he is to be away from Hyunjin. "I wish I had a time machine." 

"Why?" 

"If a time machine were at my hands, I would gladly use it to head back in time and fix all the mistakes I made with my envy and hatred. I was so selfish and didn't bat an eye when Hyunjin was upset with my actions. All I cared for was for him to only be around me, and I would rage if he hung out with anyone else." Jeongin starts crying, and Jisung doesn't do anything about it. He only stares down and listens to Jeongin's sobs. "It's pointless and impossible. The mistakes are there punishing me in my mind, making me regret what I did. I wish I could go back and treat Hyunjin so much better. I want Hyunjin in my arms, I want to feel him, but he hates my guts." 

Jisung returns his eyes to Jeongin. "Tell him what you said to me. I'm sure he'll understand." 

Jeongin wipes his tears and looks at Jisung with disbelief plastered on his face. "Jisung...he seriously hates me...Hyunjin once claimed he didn't want to associate with a liar like me ever again. And another day, he happily told me-" Jeongin puffs out a breath and looks up at the cloudless blue sky. "-he moved on."

"Well, Hyunjin does hate being lied to," Jisung says, "But you should talk to him maybe-"

"No, Jisung, it won't work, believe me. I don't even have even the slightest chance with him, so I won't even bother talking to him." Jeongin sighs again. "And Jisung, sorry about the things I did to you, it was so immoral of me to damage your friendship because of my jealousy. I don't even deserve your forgiveness. I'm such a scumbag, aren't I?" 

"Don't degrade yourself, Jeongin. Everyone makes mistakes, and you talking about how you feel and explaining how sorry you are, shows how much you care and would like to improve yourself. I forgive you," Jisung responds softly, and notices pour down Jeongin's cheek. "Stop crying, Jeongin-ah, you're making my chest feel so heavy."

"Sorry," Jeongin mutters and looks away, "You're so nice and kind-hearted." 

"You think so?" Jisung cocks his head to the side. Jeongin looks at him and smiles. Something about his smile and the way his eyes twinkled sends warmth inside of Jisung. 

"The nicest ever." Jeongin laughs. "Thank you for deciding to forgive me." Jeongin leaps out of his swing and stands in front of Jisung. Jisung stands up as well. "I will be a better person!" 

Jisung lets a tiny laugh leave him. "Thank you for apologizing." He then swaps his joyous expression with a serious one. "May I ask what you are getting therapy for? Is everything okay?"

Jeongin shakes his head. "I'd rather not share, sorry. Maybe I'll tell you soon if I'm comfortable enough with sharing. Do you still have my number?" Jisung shakes his head in shame, remembering that he deleted his number. "It's okay, it's okay! I..um...I deleted your number a while ago. Let's exchange numbers again." 

They exchange numbers, and Jisung smiles at Jeongin joyfully - happy that things are getting better between the two. 

A slam sounding from a distance rips Jisung's gaze from Jeongin, and he directs his gaze over to Minho, who is storming away from his car - now heading towards them. Minho shoots a piercing glare right at Jisung as he nears. 

"Jisung, what the fuck?" Minho growls. Jisung's heart stings at the sternness in Minho's voice. "Get in my car, now." Jisung shakes his head. Minho drags in a deep breath, attempting to calm himself down. " _ Jisung, get in the car _ ." 

"You can't tell me what to do!" 

Minho grabs him by the wrist. "What are you doing here with Jeongin? Do you want to get hurt by him again? And why did you leave me?" Jisung tries to rip from Minho's grasp but fails. 

"I didn't hurt him. I just wanted to talk to him," Jeongin responds. 

Minho tears his eyes from Jisung and sets them on Jeongin. "Are you trying to fucking manipulate him?"

"Minho! He isn't-" 

Minho raises his hand, silencing Jisung, and pulls him behind him, 'protecting' him from Jeongin. Jisung grits his jaw and looks at Jeongin apologetically - not that Jeongin saw since his flaring eyes targets Minho. 

"Don't hurt Jisung, you'll regret it," Jeongin asserts sternly. Minho lets go of Jisung and punches Jeongin on the mouth. 

Jisung widens his eyes. "Minho! What the hell!" He rushes to Jeongin and touches his bleeding lip. "Are you okay?" 

Minho wraps his arms around Jisung's waist and pulls him back. "Regret? What is there for me to regret? Unlike you, I treat Jisung nicely."  _ Yeah, sure, _ Jisung rolls his eyes, and Jeongin catches it. 

"It doesn't look like it, Minho-"

"What makes you think that huh? A piece of shit like you didn't know how to treat anyone right and was the worst to Hyunjin. You hurt him, and he obviously is disgusted with you." The blood inside Jisung goes cold, those words causing him sadness. 

"Minho, he-" 

"Quiet," Minho cuts Jisung off, "Jeongin, would you do us a favor and stay away from us? We want nothing to do with you." 

Minho starts pulling Jisung away, and the younger turns his head to look at Jeongin one last time, and his heart shatters when he sees Jeongin walking away. 

Jisung sits down on the passenger seat and sulks, turning his head away from Minho in distress. Minho doesn't say anything through the entirety of the drive. When heading towards Minho's apartment, Jisung stays a few steps behind him. 

Minho presses in the (new) code to his apartment and holds the door open for Jisung; reluctantly, Jisung steps inside. Minho shuts the door sort of loudly, making Jisung chew on his bottom lip in apprehension. "You shouldn't be around Jeongin, okay? He hurt you." 

"Says the one who held onto my wrist so tightly," Jisung mutters, and instantly Minho widens his eyes. 

"Baby, I'm so sorry," Minho replies and steps to Jisung, grasping onto his hands and nears Jisung's wrist to his mouth. 

Jisung's yanks his hands away from Minho's lips irritatedly and shoots him a glare. "Don't 'baby' me!" 

He regretted shouting once he sees tears fall out of Minho's eyes. "Jisung, I'm sorry."

But he  _ doesn't _ stop shouting because he is angry. "Don't be sorry for me! Apologize to Jeongin, the one you yelled at! You didn't let him or me explain! He simply apologized to me. Minho, you should consider someone's feelings before you let out your anger towards them. Jeongin was extremely upset, and he is having a hard time." 

"I'm sorry. What can I do to make you not upset with me anymore?" Minho asks pleadingly. 

"If you have his number, text him an apology, and show it to me," Jisung answers sternly. 

"The fuck am I supposed to apologize to him for? He treated you like shit before! And I'm still mad about that."

"He treated me like shit before but not today! And you punched him on the fucking mouth!" 

"Fine." Minho breathes out angrily and slides his phone out of his pocket. "I'll apologize, but I'm still mad at him." When he finishes with the typing, he shows Jisung the text message. Jisung reads it, then nods in approval. 

"Thank you," Jisung says and slides his arms around Minho's neck, pulling him in for a hard kiss. Minho drags his hands down to Jisung's butt and stops at the back of his thighs. He lifts him up, and Jisung locks his legs around Minho's waist. 

They end up in Minho's bedroom, Jisung flat on his stomach against Minho's bed, completely naked with Minho kissing him down his back. 

\---------

"What are you doing?" Jisung plops down next to Minho on the couch and starts snacking on chips. Minho peers at Jisung and opens his mouth. Jisung lets out a laugh and puts a chip into his mouth. 

The older boy chews happily. "I'm typing up a contract."

"Contract?" Jisung glances at Minho's laptop screen. "What for?" 

"I'll let you see when I'm done." Minho returns to typing.

When done, Minho gives Jisung his laptop, and Jisung begins reading the contract. 

** Lee Minho's crucial contract **

Duration: Three Months.

I, Lee Minho, created this arrangement for my boyfriend, Han Jisung, and for a pest named Hwang Hyunjin regarding previous events. Beneath this statement are rules I've formed with a lot of thought and care. 

** Rule 1: No Physical contact.  **

I ______________ will not touch Han Jisung under any circumstances (no kissing anywhere, no hugging, basically no touching at all) unless it is a valid emergency. 

** Rule 2: Limited Friendship.  **

I ______________ and ______________ will remain as friends, but we are not allowed to spend time with each other unless accompanied by Lee Minho. 

If Hwang Hyunjin or Han Jisung these rules, I will double the time. 

I _____________ and ______________ approve of everything explained above and will follow the rules no matter what. 

"Are you my boyfriend, or are you my bodyguard now?" Jisung asks and places Minho's laptop on the coffee table. "You're taking this too far." 

"I'm not taking it far at all. I'm doing what's right for us," Minho replies and places his hand on Jisung's thigh. 

Jisung snorts in frustration and stands up swiftly. "Doing what's right for us? You're making me so unhappy. I'd appreciate it if you delete that contract." 

" _ Ohh _ , so I am making you unhappy because I'm not letting Hyunjin touch or _ kiss _ you?" 

Rage burns inside of Jisung, and he ends up shouting, "You're so petty! Hyunjin apologized for what he did. I don't understand why you have to take things so far and write a fucking contract!" 

"Maybe I wouldn't have been petty and gone this far if he didn't kiss you on the neck! It's my place to kiss!" Minho shouts back. 

"My neck is your property? What am I to you? A thing you just kiss?"

"No, Jisung, you are not a thing, nor are you a thing I just kiss. I kiss you because I love you. I kiss you to fill you with Minho, Minho, and more Minho. I kiss you because I want you to feel loved, baby." Minho wraps his arms around Jisung and pulls him down onto the couch with him. "I wrote this contract because I am still upset that Hyunjin kissed you there. I am not pulling you away from your friends. That is not my intention. If it were, then I'd write all your other friends on the contract. You and Hyunjin are way too close for my liking." 

"Do you even care about me?" Jisung rips away from Minho. "You're doing this all for your benefit!" 

"I am not, Jisung!" 

"I can't believe you are getting worked over something so small! First, you got so mad at me for talking to Jeongin, and now you create this one shit of a contract! Hyunjin means so much to me, and you are practically trying to rip us apart!"

"Ripping you two apart?! Where on the fucking contract did I type that?! I will still let you be his friend!"

" _ Limited _ friendship," Jisung points out, "And you're so fucking horrible for calling Hyunjin a pest on the contract! How can you write about my best friend like that!?" 

"It looks like you care about Hyunjin more than me. What he did hurts me!" 

"What you're doing is fucking hurting me!" Jisung snaps back, and heated tears stream hard down his cheeks. "I'm not going to sign the contract, and neither will Hyunjin!" 

"I guess you're not committed to me." 

"What-"

What pulls the two away from their heated argument is a knock at the door. Minho exhales angrily, heads to the door, and swings it open harshly. Behind the door stands Chan and Felix. They came back from Australia. 

"Hey, Minho! How have you been?" Chan pulls Minho in for a hug. Jisung glares at the back of Minho's head sharply then cut his gaze to Felix, who smiles at him brightly. Jisung doesn't smile back, and Felix's expression falters. 

The younger boy pushes his way in and approaches Jisung, placing his hands onto Jisung's shoulders. "You're crying...are you okay?" He asks in a whisper. Jisung shakes his head. "Do you want to step outside?" Jisung bottom lip wobbles as he nods at that question. Felix intertwines his fingers with Jisung's. 

"Jisung, you don't look too happy. What's wrong?" Chan asks his full attention now to Jisung. 

Felix and Jisung look at each other. "We just want to walk and catch up," Felix replies for him. 

"Did something happen between you and Minho?" Chan furrows his brows in concern, then looks at Minho. "You looked so mad when you opened the door." Minho doesn't reply, only narrowing his eyes in exasperation. 

"I really need to be outside." Jisung breathes and looks over Minho.

"Have fun," Minho scoffs. 

"Oh, I will, Minho! I don't even want to see your face!"

"Then why are you looking at me right now?" 

"You're such a fucking asshole!" 

"Hey, hey, hey! Stop it, you two!" Chan cuts in.

Minho ignores him and yells, "I'm the asshole!? What the fuck! You're the asshole, crying over Hyunjin and not caring about me enough! If you love him so much, go to him and let him suck your neck again! Isn't that what you want?"

Jisung could feel the color drain from his face. Felix huffs and tightens his grip on Jisung's hand. 

Chan seems utterly shocked and then looks at Minho in complete disappointment. "Felix, go ahead and take Jisung outside. I'll talk to Minho." 

Felix and Jisung head away from the apartment building. The two walk silently together - maybe not silently because Jisung couldn't stop crying. 

Finally, they arrive at a Café, the warmth and the smell of coffee engulfing Jisung. Felix tells the cashier their order, and then they make their way to the furthest table and sit across from each other. 

Felix begins to speak, "It seems like you and Minho had a huge fight. I can't believe you two even cursed angrily at each other." 

Jisung sighs and props his head with his hand. "I can't agree with him on some things, that's why we frequently-" he couldn't even finish his sentence and starts crying pathetically. 

Felix moves from his spot to sit next to Jisung, and he pulls him into a hug, muttering so many 'its okays.' 

The cashier announces their order number, and Felix leaves his chair. When he returns, he places a plate with a slice of chocolate Cheesecake and an Americano in front of Jisung and sits down. 

For a little moment, they eat in silence until Felix breaks it. "Are you okay enough to explain what happened to me, or do you need some time?"

Jisung chooses to explain everything that happened from coming back from Jeju to what happened today. Felix, for some reason, starts tearing up, making Jisung tear up yet again. 

"Oh my goodness, Jisung," Felix mutters once he composes himself, "Oh my goodness..." He covers his face with his hands, lets out a sharp cold sigh, and gazes at Jisung with so much pity. "Out of everything you told me, the thing that is so upsetting is the fact that he slapped you out of anger." 

"He apologized for it, don't worry about that." 

Felix narrows his eyes at Jisung in disbelief before he speaks. "This is my opinion, just my opinion, but I think your relationship with Minho is not so good. Not only does he erupt quickly, but he treats you way over protectively and possessively. It can be a good thing because it shows how much he loves you.  _ But! _ Minho is going too overboard. By creating a  _ contract _ for you and Hyunjin, he is showing how insecure he is." 

Jisung nods slightly at the words. "I don't know what to do. What do you think I should do?"

"You make your own choice. What is your heart telling you to do?"

With all the pain resting in his heart, there was no way for it to help. It doesn't even bother helping, so Jisung decides to think of a logical approach that would best benefit him. After selecting the best approach, he tells Felix. 

Felix just nods, then looks down at Jisung's Cheesecake. "You only ate half. Can I finish the rest?" 

"Yeah, I'm not that hungry." Jisung slides the plate to Felix, then he folds his arms over the table and rests his head over them. Felix sighs and rubs his back. 

\--------

"How is Jisung feeling?" Chan asks when he opens the door. In Jisung's peripheral vision, he sees Felix shaking his head. Chan looks at Jisung with full concern, and Jisung changes his gaze to Minho, who slips up from his spot on the couch and take a few steps forward. 

Jisung steps inside and immediately turned for Minho's room, with his intentions. 

"Where are you going?" Minho's voice breaks through the firm air. 

Jisung pauses and turns to Minho. "I'm going to your room."  _ To grab my belongings and leave _ . He enters Minho's room, looks around for the bag he brought here, and when Jisung finds it, he slings it over his shoulder. 

He turns to the bedroom door, only to find Minho standing there with a hurt expression. 

"Where are you planning to go, Jisung?" 

Jisung inhales deeply and makes his way over to Minho. "I'm going home. Can you move out of my way?" Minho doesn't move a single inch, proceeding to block Jisung's way. 

"Minho," Chan softly says Minho's name. Minho moves from the door letting Jisung pass by. He hears Minho start sobbing right away - bringing in more pain to Jisung's already aching heart. 

" _ Jisung _ ," Minho whines with sadness. Jisung stops walking and spins to Minho. 

"I think we need some time away from each other," Jisung says and starts walking away again, his legs feeling heavy as his heart. He heads straight for the front door, where Felix was standing by, waiting. 

Suddenly arms wrap around him from behind. "Are you breaking up with me?" Tears fill Jisung's eyes, and he grabs Minho's forearms, pulling them off from around his waist.

He turns to him. "Minho...we need a break from each other." 

Minho takes Jisung's hand in his, giving them a desperate squeeze. "Jisung, no, we can't be apart from each other. I'm sorry about what I said to you, I'll delete the contract! Please stay here." 

"I'm a mess. We are a mess," Jisung replies and turns his face away when the tears fall. "Thank you for this summer." 

Jisung leaves, Minho doesn't stop him. Jisung feels sad because of that, but he continues his way. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: mentions of death and suicide
> 
> I feel like this is currently one of the harshest chapters, maybe or maybe not things will get better next chapter. Since I released this chapter so late I'll spoil a major thing that will happen in the next chapter and the chapter after that. 
> 
> Next chapter, a particular jerk will manipulate Jisung. 
> 
> The chapter after that, a character will (possibly) die it will be one of these three: Jeongin, Minho, or Felix. The death will either be a murder or suicide.
> 
> I hope you enjoyed this unenjoyable sad chapter~!


	29. Cant get you out of my mind

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: non-consensual kissing and touching

When Jisung meant home, he didn't mean that he was going to return to his dorm. He would only consider his dorm his home if Hyunjin were to be there. 

He wouldn't want to return to his dorm as of right now because Minho would undoubtedly pester him by knocking, knocking, knocking, and Jisung would ignore, ignore, ignore. They need to be away from each other for this break to work. 

"Is this your house? It's so big and pretty," Felix comments when they arrive at Jisung's parent's home. Yeah, that's where Jisung decided to go: to his parents' house, who didn't care about him and only wanted him to achieve  _ their  _ dreams. 

"Seungmin and Hyunjin live only two blocks away from me. Their houses are right next to each other," Jisung states, ignoring Felix's compliment and rings the bell. 

"They live only two blocks away from you? That must be so nice." Felix beams. "Ahhh! I can't wait to see them later! Please do take me to their houses!"

"Of course, of course," Jisung replies with a grin. 

Finally, Jisung's Mom opens the door. First, she looks at Jisung with no emotions on her face - emotionless or not, Jisung could feel her disappointment. It is enough to make immense unease slide up his skin. 

He clears his throat. "Hello Mom, long time no see." 

She sighs and nods at him. "Hello, Jisung." Then she looks at Felix. 

"Hello," Felix says brightly and bows, "My name is Felix. I'm Jisung's friend." 

Felix somehow saves Jisung - or so Jisung believes. Jisung finds happiness on his Mom's face. It's all likely because of Felix; he introduced himself so cheerfully. Felix has this happiness bringing, lovely aura. He is the shining sun that shows up right after the storm, eventually bringing warm light to people's days. 

He brought some light into Jisung's day. Right after they left Minho's place and got inside the bus, Felix cheered him up a little. During the ride on the bus, the long comforting talk made Jisung a little more optimistic about this break between him and Minho. Maybe things will get better between them soon. 

"Felix? Are you a foreigner?" Jisung's Mom asks in complete interest. 

"Yes, I came here from Australia," Felix replies cheerfully. 

"Come in." She moves to the side, letting the two boys slip in. She closes the door and faces them. "Are you two hungry? I'll cook you something." 

"I'm not hungry, Mom, it's fine." Jisung waves dismissively and places his bag down on the floor by the couch. 

"Not hungry? Look how skinny you've gotten. I can tell you aren't eating enough and aren't taking care of yourself well. If you eat well, then you will be able to focus better in your classes." She walked away before Jisung could reply. He lets out a sigh and shares a look with Felix. 

"You're Mom cares about you so much," Felix says and plops down onto the couch. 

"Yeah, sure," Jisung responds and sits down next to him, leaning back against the back cushion. 

His Mom calls them when she finishes preparing them their meal. They sit down at the dinner table next to each other. Jisung's Mom drags out a chair and sits across from Jisung. 

"How was university?" she asks. 

"It was alright," Jisung replies. 

"Yeah," Felix agrees. 

"How is Jisung? Is he any trouble?" 

"No, Jisung isn't any trouble at all!" Again, Felix responds so cheerfully, "He is such a fantastic person. He was so welcoming when I first met him. He is kind to me and the others, and overall is a fun person to be around." 

Jisung looks at Felix. The compliment just warmed his heart. "You are the sweetest person."

Once they finish eating, Jisung offers to clean the dishes, and when done, he steps into the living room and joins his Mom and Felix on the couch, pulling the two off their conversation. 

"Felix and I are going to Seungmin and Hyunjin," Jisung announces. 

"Okay, but Felix, can you wait for Jisung outside? I need to talk to him privately real quick," Jisung's Mom responds. Jisung and Felix look at each other simultaneously, and Jisung nods at him to go ahead. 

"Jisung, you look so different," his Mom states. Jisung lifts his eyebrows in confusion. He didn't think there was anything different about him. He still feels like the same Han Jisung from months ago. It could be his hair, though; he did dye it a little while ago. 

"It's my hair, isn't it? I dyed it dark blue." Jisung takes in several strands of his hair between his thumb and pointer finger and rubs it. "It faded. Maybe I should dye it again." 

"Nevermind, I think I was just overthinking things. It's been so long since I last saw you." His Mom sighs in defeat. "Firstly, I want to apologize for everything I did-"  _ Wait a minute!  _ Is Jisung hearing this right? His Mom just apologized to him! "-You not coming back home for summer break upset me, and it made me realize how scarce and important you are to me. I felt that you hated me after how hard I've been on you. Jisung." She places her hand on Jisung's shoulder. "You're a grown boy now. Feel free to do whatever makes you happy." 

"You're okay with me making music?" Jisung widens his eyes. 

"Definitely. Your father and I weren't at first fond of it because we wanted you to be successful and pursue something realistic to make good money, like being a surgeon like your father or a software engineering manager like your older brother. He makes eight figures now, managing the company so well. But now, we just want you to be happy and let you do anything you desire. I want you to wake up in the morning happy to go to work, not dreadful." 

"Thank you, Mom," Jisung says, his heart-melting by his Mom's words. Understanding is what he wanted, and now he has it. He starts crying. How embarrassing, he doesn't cry in front of his parents. 

"Oh no, don't cry." His Mom quickly cups Jisung's face and wipes away his tears. "Now hurry, let's not make Felix wait for too long." 

Jisung leaves his house and finds Felix dancing, likely out of boredom. Jisung chuckles, abruptly causing Felix to pause and gaze at Jisung in complete embarrassment. "You're talented." Jisung pats his back assuringly, and they walk until they reach the front of Hyunjin's house. 

Jisung knocks on the door, and Hyunjin answers the door, a big smile appearing on his face. "Hi, Jisung! Hi, Felix!" He hugs both of them. "I missed you!" 

"I missed you too," Felix replies and giggles, "Let's go bother Seungmin."

They approach Seungmin's house, and Hyunjin knocks on the door. Seungmin's Dad answers and calls out Seungmin's name. The boy came rushing down the stairs, and he leaped into Felix's arms. Felix hugs him back tightly.

Seungmin lets them inside his house, and they head up to his room. All four of them sit down on Seungmin's bed and start talking about their summer. 

The conversation was fun until Hyunjin asked Jisung about Minho. Jisung told him that things between the two are fine, and Hyunjin, being an excellent lie-detector, catches Jisung's lie right away. 

"What is going on between you two?" Seungmin interjects, raising his brows in curiosity. 

"We just got into a fight again, and I told him that we need a break from each other, so here I am, back home," Jisung responds. 

"I think this is a sign that you two need to break up," Hyunjin points out, "You fell in love with the wrong person." 

Jisung hides the annoyance he feels when Hyunjin stated that. He doesn't want to break up with Minho; Minho means the whole world to Jisung even if they fight. He didn't fall in love with the wrong person; he fell in love with a perfect person. He loves Minho with all his life. 

"Hyunjin, just because Minho and I fight and don't agree on something doesn't mean I fell in love with the wrong person." 

"What did you two fight about this time?" Seungmin asks.

"It's nothing," Jisung replies and shares a look with Felix. 

"Okay, we won't push you for answers," Hyunjin says with a sigh, "But if anything happens, remember that we are here for you."

"Thanks." Jisung smiles.

\--------

When Jisung's Dad comes home from his work, they sit down at the dinner table for dinner and talk about many things. Jisung tells them about how he is going to debut - and their reactions are shocking. His Mom congratulated him and wished him luck. His Dad didn't look too happy about his career choice but didn't question or scold him about it. Is it all a dream? It just has to be. They went from being harsh and conservative parents to lovely parents that Jisung always wanted. 

"So, did you find yourself a girlfriend?" His Mom asks. 

"Nope," Jisung replies. 

"That's good. Being in a relationship is distracting," Jisung's Dad says and wipes his mouth with a napkin. "Especially since you will be debuting pretty soon, you wouldn't want to get into scandals." 

"I am in a relationship, though," Jisung states, "But not with a girl, with a boy."

His Dad places down his chopsticks, staring hard into Jisung's eyes. "A  _ boy? _ Who is this boy?" Jisung swallows nervously. 

"Is it Hyunjin? Both of you had such great chemistry with each other. It was so adorable," Jisung's mom coos. 

"No, it's not Hyunjin." Jisung takes out his phone, picks one picture of the hundreds of Minho, and hands his phone over to his Mom. "His name is Minho, isn't he so beautiful?" 

Jisung's Mom looks at the picture for a few seconds, a huge smile growing, "Wow, he is so handsome! Look." She hands the phone over to Jisung's Dad, and he stares at it for a few seconds before giving Jisung his phone back. 

"I would like to meet him to ensure whether or not he is suitable for you. Consider personality rather than looks. It would be best if you were with someone mature and responsible." 

"Minho is mature and responsible. He takes care of me a lot. There is so much I love about him, and I'm sure you will love him too," Jisung ensures with a smile. 

"I can't wait to meet him, so...when will you tell him?" Jisung's Mom asks. Sadly, Jisung and Minho are on a break from each other, so he can't have him meet them yet. 

"I'll tell him soon," Jisung says. 

\--------

Jisung's alone at home, lying hopelessly on his bed with his phone in his hand, debating whether or not to text Minho. The past week without Minho dragged by tortuously. The brunette crosses his mind frequently, even though Jisung didn't even want to think of him. 

He drops his phone down next to him on the mattress and turns to his side. He feels so empty, bored, and upset. Hyunjin and Seungmin can cure his boredom and sadness - they aren't too far away - but they aren't  _ Minho _ . Jisung wants to see Minho more than anyone else. He wants to touch him, kiss him hard, and embrace him all day. 

Fuck this break. Jisung regrets telling Minho that they need a break from each other because of their fights. Being apart from Minho isn't refreshing Jisung's mind; he can't stop thinking about him. 

From morning to late night, his mind is all Minho, Minho, Minho, and Minho. Nothing else. 

Without Minho, Jisung only feels miserable. 

Jisung hears the doorbell ring, making him groan in irritation because he didn't want to get out of bed. He forces himself to get out of bed, rushes down the rug covered steps, and picks up his Mom's iPad from the couch to check the front door camera. Right in front of the door is Hyunjin with Kkami in his arms and Seungmin petting Kkami. 

He lets them in; Kkami begins wriggling with Hyunjin's grasp, and Hyunjin places her onto the floor, letting her explore the living room. The three boys stroll over to the couch and sit down. 

"Jisung, you are a mess," Hyunjin blurts out, "Your hair is untidy, and your face looks oily." 

Jisung feels his face burn to crimson. "I haven't combed my hair or showered in three days. I feel too down." 

"It's because of Minho, isn't it?" Seungmin questions, "Being away from Minho isn't doing you any good. You look so sad and aren't taking care of yourself." 

"I believe your break is pointless. Do you even need a break from Minho?" Hyunjin adds in with a frown, "I don't like Minho, and I don't like the fact that you are dating that asshole, but the pain you feel hurts me. I want to see you happy, and I know that the only way you will feel it is when you are with Minho." 

"I think I'll get used to being away with him," Jisung replies. 

Seungmin and Hyunjin look at each other sadly, and when the front door opens, they look over at Jisung's Mom, who returned from the supermarket with two bags in her hand. She smiles at the three boys before walking to the kitchen to place the food items in their correct places. 

"Jisung." Hyunjin looks at him. "Shower and get dressed. Let's go somewhere to boost your mood." 

Even though Jisung didn't want to leave his home and face the outside world after days, he pulls himself out of his couch and goes to shower right away. He is glad not to feel icky and smell sweaty. He changes into clean and comfortable clothes and leaves the bathroom. 

Jisung's Mom offers to drop them off at the shopping mall, saying that it'd be better than taking the bus. 

The three boys and Jisung's Mom travel to various shops; they enjoyed their time there. Jisung finally dyed his hair a new color - dark red; Hyunjin recommended that color, and Jisung loves it so much. 

He even forgot about Minho (temporarily). Too bad that once he returned home with his bag of new clothes, the sadness stabbed him. 

\--------

On the living room couch, Jisung rests wrapped in his soft blanket staring at the tv, not focusing on the movie. He feels like he is going to break. 

With sadness and regret, Jisung wasted another week. Today is just so much worse compared to the previous days. It's his fault, though. Hyunjin, Seungmin, Felix, Chan, Changbin, and even Minho will go to the theme park in about an hour. They are going to spend their entire day there, having fun and laughing while Jisung lays here sulking over Minho. 

Going to the amusement park was Felix's suggestion; he thought it would be cool to have fun all together before 3RACHA returns to training and prepping next week for their upcoming debut. 

They texted about it two days ago in their recently revived group chat that Jisung keeps muted. Of course, he read all of their messages but didn't reply to them - not wanting to go. He doesn't deserve fun; he's too sad to have fun.

Since Jisung didn't respond, Hyunjin grew worried and ended up texting him, asking if he was okay. Jisung only responded with a thumbs-up emoji, causing Hyunjin to head to Jisung's home right away to make sure he was okay.

_ "Please, Jisung, you need to have some fun! I want you to come along," Hyunjin pleads. Jisung shakes his head. "I know you don't want to go because of Minho. Minho and I don't like each other. You can stick with me instead. You don't have to focus on him."  _

_ No matter how hard Jisung would try not to let Minho in his mind, he would end up there eventually.  _

_ Jisung shakes his head. "I'm not feeling well enough to go. You go ahead and have fun with them."  _

_ "Jisung," Hyunjin whines. Jisung stares at him sternly, wanting him to stop pleading, and Hyunjin stops and lets out a wistful sigh. "Okay, it's your choice, but if you change your mind, text me. We are going to be there from mid-morning to evening. I hope you decide to come. I would be so happy if you do."  _

Jisung shuts his eyes, his tears slipping out. There is a hole in his heart, and the only person to fill it would be Minho. Jisung wonders how Minho is doing and if he feels the same loneliness and emptiness Jisung feels.

"Jisung, breakfast is ready," his Mom says from the kitchen. 

Jisung opens his eyes and quickly wipes away his tears so that his Mom doesn't notice that he was crying. He manages to lift his tired self from the couch, and he strides to the dining table, where his Mom is, placing food onto the table. The two sit across from each other, and his Mom stares at him for a few seconds. The way she stared curiously made it seem like she had something to say. 

Jisung averts his gaze to his food. "Is there something wrong?" He asks.

His Mom picks up a piece of meat from one of the plates with her chopsticks and places it on top of Jisung's untouched rice. "Jisung, I have eyes. I see how upset you are. And I have ears. I overheard your conversation with Hyunjin about Minho and how you didn't want to go to the amusement park." _ Busted _ . And he didn't even know what to say to counter her claim. The only option he had was to speak the truth. 

"Minho and I are taking a break from each other." Jisung stops speaking momentarily to eat a spoonful of rice. "I was the one who decided to take a break from him. We got angry at each other and fought, so I thought it would be best to stay away from him for a while and think. My separation from him is bringing nothing but pain. I feel so empty without him." 

"No couple is perfect. A lot of couples fight a lot. It's completely natural. What matters most is the love for each other and to learn and grow," Jisung's Mom states, "You should talk to him soon, look how sad you are without him." 

"You're right." Jisung sighs. 

\--------

It's noon; Jisung is in his bedroom, sitting at the edge of his bed, thinking. His friends and boyfriend are currently at the Amusement Park; Jisung saw it from Minho's location. Thank god he still keeps his location shared with him.

Should he go? He wants to see his boyfriend; he  _ needs _ to see him. There's this pull in his heart, telling him to go to the amusement park, which isn't too far away. 

He is indecisive about it; he wants to go, but at the same time, he just wants to stay home. 

His heart hammers against his chest, wanting him to go but the looming thoughts in his head tell him it's best if he stays. 

** Go.  **

_ Should I? _

** Go.  **

_ Hmm...maybe it's too late. Would the others want me there with them? _

** Just go. **

_ I'll have fun with them another time. Wouldn't it be so awkward to show up after telling Hyunjin that I didn't want to go?  _

** JUST GO.  **

Jisung listens to his heart, rips from his bed, and runs to the bathroom to shower. 

He dresses in black ripped skinny jeans and a black shirt and puts on black platform boots. He hopes this outfit looks attractive enough and would grab Minho's attention right away. 

He heads down the stairs and approaches his Mom. "Mom, can you take me to the amusement park?" She gives him a knowing smile and nods. 

His Mom drops him off at the pretty amusement park. He waits in line, pays for his ticket, heads in, and looks around this humongous place crowded with so many people. 

Remembering Hyunjin's words, Jisung texts him, telling him that he decided to come a little late. He waits for his best friend's response, and for five minutes, he doesn't get one. Hyunjin is probably on one of the rides. 

Jisung purses his bottom lip into a pout and decides to find them based on Minho's location. 

As he walks, his phone suddenly sounds, and he takes it out. Hyunjin finally texted Jisung back, telling him that he is happy that he finally decided to come and that he is waiting in line for a rollercoaster- telling him which one. 

Jisung arrives at the said area and searches for a bench. He finds a bench and spots Minho sitting there with AirPods in, watching something on his phone. Jisung's heart quickens in pace, and nervousness spurs its way into his stomach. 

Minho lifts his gaze from his phone to look at Jisung; he eyes him from top to bottom, causing Jisung to blush. However, when Minho shifts his gaze to his phone again, Jisung sulks; it appears as if Minho doesn't even care that he is here. 

Jisung sits next to him and lays his hand on Minho's thigh to grab his attention again. 

Minho removes his AirPods from his ears and glares at Jisung. "Can you take your hand off me? People are going to get the wrong idea of us." 

Jisung's heart cracks. "Wrong idea?" 

"Mhm. You don't want that, do you?" Minho says, "You shouldn't ruin your reputation before your debut." 

It was a big mistake coming here, a big mistake for dressing like this,  _ a big fucking mistake _ . Minho doesn't seem to like him anymore - he didn't bother with his presence, and he doesn't even look happy with Jisung's presence. Jisung feels so much more pain; it's worse than the pain he felt when he was away from Minho. 

"Minho, I missed you a lot," Jisung states, tears sliding down his cheeks, "I can't go a day without you. These past few days were so hard on me." 

Minho snorts, "See, this is why you should've thought before deciding to take a break from me. You made me feel like trash and made me seem like the villain. I hope this sadness of yours teaches you to think before turning away. Last more days without me. I'm doing perfectly fine." 

"D-Do you hate me?" Jisung whimpers out. 

"I hate that you decided to take a break from me." Minho rolls his eyes, puts his AirPods back in his ears - his attention right back at his phone. 

Jisung is unable to keep in his tears any longer and immediately breaks into sobs and hiccups. He covers his mouth with his hand to stifle in his cries, and with the other, he frantically wipes away his tears. Minho doesn't say or do anything about it. Minho hates him. Jisung regrets the idea of taking a break from him; it helped with nothing! Because of it, Minho doesn't love him anymore. 

Jisung again wipes away the flowing tears and leaves the bench. Minho doesn't want him here. Jisung doesn't want to be here. Minho doesn't stop, nor does he call out Jisung's name. 

Jisung means nothing to him. 

He heads to some smoothie place, orders a strawberry smoothie, and sits at a table far away from people. He turned his back towards everyone so that no one could see him cry.

After a while, his phone sounds, and he quickly takes it out of his pocket, hoping that Minho is apologizing for being so hurtful. The last thing Jisung wants from him is his hate. He is terrified that Minho would eventually grow tired of him and would break up with him. 

But, instead of it being Minho texting him, it is Hyunjin.

Hyunjin [2:46 PM]: Where are you? Please tell me that Minho deserved the yell from me. Minho said that you did come but left. I feel like he is the reason behind that. 

Jisung [2:46 PM]: He is why I left. Please come by. I'm at the smoothie place not too far from you.

Within a few minutes, Hyunjin shows up and sits across from Jisung. Right away, Jisung starts sobbing heavily. 

"Fuck, he didn't deserve a yell. He deserves a punch in the face," Hyunjin growls, "Tell me what he did to you." 

Jisung manages to tell him what happened, and Hyunjin burns with so much anger, his eyebrows knitted together and his jaw tight. He looked like he would kill. 

"That fucking shit. Why are you holding onto that jerk?"

"I love him, Hyunjin," Jisung whines and wipes away his tears. 

"You love that piece of shit who can't treat you right and is bitter?"

"It's my fault. Minho has the right to be mad at me. I'm the one who told him that we should take a break, and he is hurt by it." 

"Pft, you don't need a break from him. You need to break up with him! Find yourself a better person," Hyunjin says sternly and takes Jisung's smoothie, drinking a little bit of it, "Forget that fucker." 

"But I love him so much, even though he probably doesn't feel the same for me," Jisung replies. 

Hyunjin doesn't say anything, showing that he isn't fond of talking about Minho anymore. 

Chan eventually texts Hyunjin, telling him to meet them at the gaming building. Hyunjin finishes Jisung's smoothie for him, and the two leave the smoothie place to head to the gaming building. 

Once inside, Jisung's eyes land on Minho, who is speaking to Changbin, and he lets out a sad sigh. His attention on Minho cuts to Felix, the day-younger boy hurries to Jisung and hugs him. "I'm glad you showed up. How are you feeling?"

"I'm feeling fine," Jisung forces a cheerful voice. Felix pulls away and beams at him. "Let's play games together? Wanna play with me?" 

"No, I'll just watch."

Felix pouts. "Ah, okay." He goes to Changbin instead and grabs his wrist, pulling the shorter boy out of his conversation with Minho. Minho turns his head over to Jisung and stares at him for a few seconds before heading away. 

"His eyes have no feelings in them," Jisung hears Seungmin say, and he spins to him and notices Chan standing next to him, "And you aren't fine."

"Nah, he isn't," Hyunjin chimes in, "Minho was a bitch to him." 

Chan widens his eyes a little. "What did he do?" 

"He said some hurtful things. He told Jisung that he is doing perfectly fine without him and shamed him about their break from each other," Hyunjin answers. 

Seungmin narrows his eyes in complete anger. " _ Shamed him?! _ " 

"Yes!" Hyunjin confirms, "He told him that he should've thought before calling for a break and told him that he hoped that the sadness Jisung feels would teach him to think-"

"That bastard," Chan cuts Hyunjin off, his eyes full of ice, "Jisung, come with me. We are going to have a word with him." 

The two search around for Minho and find him playing a basketball game alone. Chan approaches him, Jisung follows right behind him, trying to hide from the brunette. "Minho, are you almost finished?" Chan asks him. 

Minho stops what he is doing, his grip firm on the small basketball. "Almost-" he spots Jisung behind Chan "-why?" 

"We need to talk," Chan asserts, "Hurry and finish your game." 

"I don't want to. Talk to Jisung yourself. Both of us are on a break," Minho scoffs and throws the ball towards the hoop. Chan lets out a sharp breath, grips Minho on the arm, and pulls him towards him. 

"I'm not going to speak nicely this time to you. I tried to be friendly, and I tried to help you by giving you advice, yet I see no fucking improvement from you! I'll be brutally honest with you because you tested my patience by hurting Jisung feelings. I think you should fix your attitude. A lot of us are pissed off with you because of the way you treat Jisung. Don't you know how manipulative and cruel you are towards him? Jisung here wants to make things right, yet you are being so damn petty towards him and throw words without any thought. Like I told you the day you and Jisung fought, you need to think before you say and do things," Chan scolds and lets go of Minho's arm. 

Chan waits for a response. Minho's face loses its color; he lowers his eyes in guilt and doesn't say anything in response. 

Chan continues, "What kind of person are you starting to become? In the beginning, you wanted to be the best you could be for Jisung, thinking you were not perfect enough for him to fall in love with you. Now that the two of you are together like how you yearned for, you are moving backward and being the worst!" 

A single tear slips from Minho's eye. Then one after another, tears pour down his cheeks. Jisung hesitantly steps to Minho and wraps his arms around his waist. 

"I'm sorry, sweetie, I'm so sorry," Minho cries, pressing his face onto Jisung's shoulder, soaking his shirt, "Forgive me for the things I've said to you that day and even today. I deleted the contract. It was so stupid of me to create that. You can be close to Hyunjin without me interfering. I shouldn't take people away from you. I'm sorry for doubting you. You love me so much, and I love you too." Minho turns his head and presses a kiss against Jisung's neck. 

"I-I thought you didn't love me anymore. I was so scared," Jisung whimpers. 

Minho hugs him tighter. "I love you so much, sweetie." 

"I'll let you two talk in private. I'll be with Seungmin and Hyunjin," Chan states and leaves. 

Minho lets go of Jisung and wipes away Jisung's tears. "Let's go to my car." 

The two leave the amusement park and head straight to the parking area. Minho finds his car, unlocks it. He sits on the driver seat, and Jisung sits in the passenger seat and turns his body towards Minho. 

Minho gazes at Jisung; an unamused expression plants his face, making Jisung fearful. Did he apologize and act like he was upset with what he did just to get Chan off his back?

"Do you really have to go around telling everyone what's happening between us? It's not something they need to know! What goes on between us is only for us to know!"

"You don't even care about how I feel! I needed someone to talk to!" Jisung snaps back.

"If you have concerns, why don't you just talk to me?"

"I wouldn't want to talk to you because first of all, we were on a break from each other because we get into stupid fights! And secondly, you seem mad at me. Was that apology a couple of minutes ago all an act to get away from Chan?! Are…" Jisung's eyes fill up with water, and it spills down his cheeks. "Are you sure you love me? Or is that also an act?" 

"Oh, now you don't think I love you?" Minho furrows his brows and moves to straddle Jisung's lap. His fingers make their way into Jisung's dark-red hair, and he gently tugs at the strands. "How dare you say such a thing. I love you, baby. I'm just angry with you because of the break. I didn't want a break from you. I  _ hated _ it." He strokes Jisung's hair, then curls it around his finger as he stares into Jisung's eyes. "I missed you so much, Jisung. I felt so empty without you." 

More tears fog Jisung's vision because within Minho's eyes isn't anything like love. All he sees is a dull expression, causing Jisung to feel insignificant underneath him. He supposed that he might be overthinking, but that matte look says otherwise. Jisung knows what Minho's gaze of love is: It's a gentle look, a tiny smile, and it makes Jisung feel so warm and loved. 

He doesn't feel warm and loved; he feels cold and bare. 

Minho kisses him aggressively. Jisung moans in displeasure and shuts his eyes, his tears escaping his eyes. He doesn't like this at all; the kiss feels so forced. Minho glides his tongue into Jisung's mouth and tastes everywhere. Jisung places his hands on Minho's waist and presses his fingers in the flesh to stop Minho. 

The older boy pulls away to catch his breath. 

"Are you still mad at me?" Jisung asks, just to make sure.

"I'm not mad at you," Minho replies and kisses him again, sliding his hand up underneath Jisung's shirt to flick at his nipple. Jisung moans into Minho's mouth and grips onto his shoulder when Minho starts tugging the bud. 

Minho leaves Jisung's mouth, grabs the hem of Jisung's shirt, and pulls it off of him. "You looked so hot when you were standing in front of me. And I love this new hair color on you."

"I dressed like this while thinking of you." Minho licks up his neck, bringing Jisung shivers down his spine. 

"Just for me?" Minho whispers against Jisung's ear.

"Yes, just for you," Jisung whimpers. 

Minho latches his lips onto Jisung's shoulder, sucking hard to mark his skin. "You smell so nice." He moves to Jisung's nipple and gives it a single lick.

"M-Minho, would people see us doing this?" Jisung asks. 

With one hand Minho cups Jisung's cheek. "The front window is tinted, so no one would be able to see inside, don't worry about it. But if you want, we can do it in the back if that makes you much comfortable." 

Jisung nods; Minho gets off of him and moves to the seats in the back, pressing his back against the door. Jisung joins Minho and separates Minho's legs to situate himself between them more comfortably. He pulls off Minho's shirt and immediately leeches his mouth onto Minho's neck, biting the skin hard. Minho tilts his head back and moans. 

He moves down to his hardened bud, pinches it, tugs at it, and twirls it between his thumb and pointer finger. Minho's series of moans sends heat down Jisung's groin. 

Suddenly, Minho pushes Jisung so that he is flat on his back on the seat and hovers over him. He kisses Jisung on the lips for a few seconds, then down to his chin, neck, the center of his chest; the lower he kisses, the hotter Jisung feels.

Jisung furrows his brows and closes his eyes when Minho kisses against his tent. The brunette pulls down Jisung's jeans' zip and shoves his hand inside, causing Jisung to squeak. "Are you okay?" Minho asks. Jisung frantically nods. 

Minho reaches Jisung's nipple and sucks hard while he continues palming him. Jisung lets out a whimper and grabs Minho's hair. "You're getting so wet," he says and nibbles Jisung's bud. 

He moves away from Jisung's chest, lifts his legs, and sets them on his thighs to take off his boots. Then Minho pulls down his jeans and boxers, leaving him completely bare. 

"Can you take off your jeans too?" Jisung asks. Minho chuckles and complies; both of them completely bare. 

Minho grabs Jisung's length, licks off the precum, and takes the entire length into his warm mouth. 

It was all nice until Minho's phone sounded. The older boy leaves Jisung's throbbing length to find his phone and answer the call; Jisung makes a pouty face at the loss of Minho's mouth. 

_ 'Where the hell is you and Jisung?! _ ' Jisung could hear Chan's agitated voice. 

"We are in my car, talking in private," Minho answers. 

_ 'Oh, okay, that's good to hear. When will you return to the park?' _

"Hmm, in about thirty minutes, I guess."

_ 'Thirty minutes?!'  _ Chan shouts. __

"Is that too long?" Minho questions.

_ 'No, no, it's fine. See you,' _ Chan replies

"Okay, bye," Minho replies and hangs up. He drops his phone onto the floor beneath the seats and turns his attention back on Jisung. "Ready?" Jisung nods.

When they finished, Minho landed on top of Jisung, and the younger wrapped his arms around him. "Minho, don't get mad when I say this, but I have this worry that you don't love me as much anymore."

Minho lifts himself from Jisung's body and pulls the younger boy so that he is sitting upright as well. "Jisung, baby, I know I was rude to you earlier, but that didn't mean I didn't love you. I was mad at you." Minho cups Jisung's face and looks him deep in the eye. "All my love is for you. I'm sorry for acting hostile."

Minho kisses him one last time before picking up his shirt to clean up Jisung and the seat. 

"Why did you have to use your shirt to clean up?" Jisung asks. 

"Because I don't have napkins, and don't worry, no one will see," Minho replies and turns his shirt right side out and puts it on. 

They returned to the park and found Chan and the others. They go to the gift shops, eat, ride more of the rides, and when evening hits, all of them leave the amusement park and enter the parking area. 

Felix and Changbin decide to get inside Chan's car since they will head to the same place. Jisung, Seungmin, and (reluctantly) Hyunjin get inside Minho's car since the three younger boys live in the same area. 

The drive is silent until Hyunjin speaks up, "Are you two good now?"

"Yeah," Minho replies. 

"Why does this car smell like sex?" Jisung's face turns beet red. 

"Because we did have sex," Minho nonchalantly replies, and Jisung looks at him with wide eyes. Minho glances at him with a smirk, then focuses on the road again. "And we had sex right where you and Seungmin are sitting at."

"I shouldn't have decided to get in this car!" Hyunjin whines. Seungmin only laughs. 

Thirty minutes later, Minho pulls to the side in front of Seungmin's house. The two boys say their goodbyes and approach their homes. 

When Minho sees that the two boys are safely inside their homes, he drives two blocks straight ahead, stopping at Jisung's house. 

Jisung turns to him. "Bye, thank you for the ride." 

Something flashes in Minho's eyes, then he nods. "Good night." Jisung turns for the door. "Wait," Minho says, stopping Jisung, and he turns to him again, "Jisung, I-" he sighs. "Nevermind, see you."

Jisung frowns, gets out of Minho's car, and starts heading towards his home. His heart begins to hurt, and he spins around, seeing that Minho is still waiting for him to get inside his house. Jisung rushes to his car, opens the door, and sits on the passenger seat again. 

"Jisung, are you okay?" Minho asks, worried. 

"I love you," Jisung says.

Minho smiles. "I love you too." 

"Let's put an end to our break. I can't last without you."

"Me either, I need you," Minho responds and pulls Jisung in for a kiss. 

\--------

The dreadful fall semester starts, Jisung and Hyunjin finally return to their dorms the day before classes start. Hyunjin decided to switch his major from dance to business, and Jisung chooses to continue with music. Once again, the two boys wanted to have at least one class together, so they decided to select econ. 

In the afternoon, Jisung returns to the dorm first, and about an hour later, Hyunjin comes in with a huge frown on his face. He jumps onto his bed, stuffs his face onto his pillow, and lets out an overdramatic wail of agony.

"What's wrong?" Jisung asks. 

"Jeongin and I are in the same fucking statistics class!" Hyunjin says and screams into his pillow. He beats up his bed and lifts his face to gaze at Jisung. "Now he is going to bother me a lot and want to be with me again."

Jisung feels a pang in his heart. Jeongin was right; Hyunjin shows a strong disliking for him, and it's making Jisung upset. He pities Jeongin after hearing everything he said. Jeongin made mistakes, he apologized for his mistakes, yet Hyunjin views him as the worst person in the world. 

If only things could be okay between them. Yes, Hyunjin got hurt by him. But Jeongin is fully damaged and lost faith in himself. He feels regretful for what he did. He dwells over his mistakes and is in therapy for a reason Jisung doesn't know of yet. 

"I was wondering, will you ever open your heart for Jeongin again?" Jisung asks. 

Hyunjin swiftly lifts his upper body and shifts to face Jisung. He furrowed his eyebrows in irritation. "What makes you think I would open my heart for Jeongin? I don't want to be with a liar." 

Jisung sighs and doesn't say anything for a brief moment until he finds something to say. He quickly switches the topic, asking Hyunjin how the dance class went with Jinyoung as his teacher. It rapidly changed Hyunjin from irritation to gleefulness. 

\--------

When the professor dismisses the class, Minho shoves all of his belongings in his bag, swoops up from his spot, and rushes out of class, desperately wanting to see Jisung. He pulls out his phone and follows Jisung's location. 

He rushes up the stairway and breaks into a jog through the hall. 

Minho stops when he finds Jisung standing in front of the floor to ceiling windows staring outside. The sunlight coats Jisung so beautifully. Minho turns off his phone and shoves it in his hoodie pocket. 

Minho is about to approach the younger boy but refrains from moving when he sees someone else heading towards Jisung. He hides from their view. "Hey, Jisung." The rat says, making Jisung tense up; Minho balls his fists at his sides. How dare Daekhwa approach Jisung? Jisung turns towards him, looks at him, and then starts walking away. Minho smiles in satisfaction. "Isn't this where we used to hang out sometimes?" 

Jisung pauses and looks at Daekhwa. Minho's blood boils. "Yeah, and?"

"I just miss it when we used to hang out here," Daekhwa says and steps closer to Jisung, "How are you and Minho doing together?" Minho looks at Jisung, curious about what kind of answer he has for that question. He hopes it's a good answer. 

"We are doing fine. Thank you for your concern," Jisung answers. Okay, that was a pretty good answer. Minho smiles happily. 

" _ Fine? _ Hmm, doesn't that sound so sad? You two aren't doing  _ great? _ " Daekhwa says mockingly, "Well, that's no surprise since you are dating someone so low."  _ Low? _ Minho takes in a sharp inhale as a way to calm down his temper. 

"What do you mean?" Jisung questions, "What makes him low?"

"You see, Minho is a fake. He isn't such a great person as others perceive him as. He is nothing but an asshole and a quick-tempered fool. Jisung, you've been with him for some time now. Did you see that side of him yet?" Daekhwa asks. Minho sucks in his bottom lip at those insults. 

When Jisung nods, Minho's heart splits in half. "He gets angry at me a lot, and we even get into fights. But I understand his anger. Sometimes I don't listen to him." Minho's mouth falls open at that statement.

"He makes you do the things he wants, doesn't he?" Jisung narrows his eyes at the other and nods again. Tears drop from Minho's eyes. "Oh no, Jisung. I feel so bad for you. That possessive freak isn't doing you any good. You shouldn't be with someone who wants things to go their own way, and if it doesn't, they lash out. Isn't that so scary?" 

"Minho isn't any of those things. He is a kind and sweet person and loves me." Minho smiles again and plans to kiss Jisung once Daekhwa leaves. 

"Don't let that fakeness of his blind you, Jisung, be careful around him." Daekhwa inches even closer to him, their feet almost touching. "You need someone who treats you better." Daekhwa places his hands on Jisung's waist, and that's when Minho decides to step in.

"Hey!" 

Daekhwa rips away from Jisung, and Minho rushes over to them. He grabs Jisung's wrist, pulls him behind him, partially covering Jisung from Daekhwa's view. "Are you trying to seduce my boyfriend in a way? I heard everything, you son of a bitch. Stop trying to embed the idea of me being a bad person into Jisung's head because I am nothing near that. The bad person is you dickhead!" 

Daekhwa smirks. "Aren't you getting a little too sensitive, piece of shit?" 

Minho punches him in the face and feels Jisung's hands gripping his hips. "Come near Jisung one more time, and I'll fucking break your legs and arms." He turns to Jisung, grabs him by the wrist, and pulls him away. 

He takes him up to the third floor and pushes him inside the empty restroom. 

He presses him against the wall and places his pointer finger underneath Jisung's chin, lifting his head a little. "A kind and sweet person, Jisung says." Jisung blushes, his cheeks deep red. Minho kisses his cheeks and then presses his forehead against his and stares into his beautiful brown eyes. "Forgive me, Jisung. Forgive me for my anger and stubbornness. I love you, baby. I know sometimes you may feel that I would fall out of love with you, but don't worry about it, okay? I will never fall out of love with you. You are my life." 

Tears leave Jisung's eyes. "Minho…" he says and starts sobbing. 

"I caused you a lot of pain," Minho states, "And I don't keep my words and promises for you. I say that I will better myself for you but end up not achieving that. Please be patient with me as I make my way for improvement." 

Jisung wraps his arms around Minho's neck and kisses him. Minho feels his cheek burn and tears fall out of his eyes. "I love you," Jisung says when he pulls away.

"I love you too," Minho replies and pulls Jisung into an embrace. 

\--------

"It's been two weeks, and I'm already done with school," Hyunjin whines once he closes the door behind him, "I can't wait until winter break."

"The responsible one gives up." Jisung cackles and sits up. "You think you have it hard? Look at me! I have to go to classes and train from evening to midnight and on top of that do homework." 

Hyunjin pouts, lays on his bed, and pulls out his phone. "Poor, Jisung, and you barely get any sleep."

Jisung's phone sounds; he picks it up and smiles when he sees Minho's message, telling him to meet him at his favorite café. 

"Why are you smiling like that?" Hyunjin asks. Jisung turns his head to the older. Hyunjin is gazing right at him curiously, the corner of his lips curled a bit upwards. "It's Minho, isn't it?" 

"Yes. Minho wants to meet up with me at his favorite café," Jisung replies gleefully and presses his phone to his chest. 

"Oh, have fun," Hyunjin responds, then narrows his eyes, "Call me if he hurts you, okay? Even though things improved between the two of you, I don't trust him yet." 

"Hyunjin, he isn't going to hurt me," Jisung says and leaps out of bed, "See ya!" Hyunjin smiles at him and waves goodbye. 

Jisung arrives at the café but doesn't see Minho; maybe he is on his way here. 

Jisung sits at a booth and slides close to the window. He stares outside in boredom for a bit before shifting his gaze down at the table. 

Ten minutes pass and Minho doesn't show up. Jisung folds his arms onto the table and rests his head over them. Did Minho trick him? Probably not; he wouldn't do such a thing; he isn't ruthless. Jisung tries his best not to overthink, maybe Minho is running late. 

It's been fifteen minutes; it shouldn't take Minho fifteen minutes to get here. He texts him, asking where he is but doesn't get a reply. 

Jisung rolls his eyes in irritation, tired of waiting, and leaves the café to head straight to Minho's place. 

He approaches the bus stop, and only then, his phone sounds. Quickly he pulls it out of his pocket to see Minho's message. 

Minho [4:21 PM]: Sorry, I had to run some last-minute errands. I was going to meet you at the café to tell you that we should break up. Loving you and choosing you was a big mistake. We aren't perfect for each other as we thought we were. I wasn't such a great person to you, and I'm kind of growing tired of you. Thank you for everything. 

Jisung covers his mouth with his hand, a sob ripping from his throat. He throws his phone in anger and descends onto his knees. People looked at him worried, confused, and some even weirded out, but he doesn't give a shit because he feels like shit. 

His fears came true. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was kind of fast-paced ^^;; But I hoped you liked it. 
> 
> Here's another hint xD, Among these characters (Jeongin, Minho, and Felix) one character will be responsible for the death of the other.


	30. A damage way beyond repair

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Suicide attempt

Jisung knocks vigorously on Minho's door as tears fire down his cheeks one after another. They couldn't stop. After what happened, his emotions are unbearable; the sword consisting of Minho's injuring words stabbed right at his heart.

Minho opens the door; his face pales when he sees how hard Jisung is crying. He opens his mouth to say something, yet nothing came out; he seems too shocked to let out words. Jisung doesn't want to hear any of his shit anyway. Whatever they are, they are going to be nothing but lies. 

"Fuck you, Minho!" Jisung shouts, staring hard at Minho's dark eyes, which now shadows with anguish, "I fucking hate you! Breaking my heart is fun for you, isn't it? I'm glad it satisfies you, but now it's over, you already had enough fun. I guess being alone is better than being with you! Let's not see each other anymore." And with the next three words: "We are over," Minho's eyes well up with tears and spill from his eyes. He is just as destroyed as Jisung. 

Jisung turns away from Minho, the sword in his heart turning around as well, inflicting so much more pain. He breaks into a run, not wanting to see Minho anymore. Not wanting the other to touch him anymore and send him bullshit excuses that he doesn't want to hear. 

Sadly, Minho manages to grab Jisung before he could reach the stairway and shoves him against the wall. Jisung trembles as his insides shut down from all this pain; the only thing working is the fucking tears that pathetically drop out of his eyes. 

"What's wrong with you?" Minho carelessly says as he stares harshly into Jisung's eyes, the gaze stabbing Jisung's heart. He turns his head away, only to make Minho grab his chin between his thumb and pointer finger and quickly turn his head back forward. 

Jisung furrows his brows. "Fuck you, get away from me!" He pushes Minho away with full force, causing him to fall back and wince from the impact. 

Jisung uses this chance to run as Minho struggles on the floor. Again,  _ sadly _ , Minho catches his ankle and tugs having Jisung stumble forward - his knees hitting the floor.

With wrath, Jisung peers at the other, and without leaving his eyes, he digs his fingernails into Minho's hand, watching as the brunette's face scrunches, exposing his pain. 

"Jisung, what the fuck! What has gotten into you?!" His hand doesn't leave; he squeezes at Jisung's ankle, not wanting to let him go. Jisung switches to slapping Minho's hand harshly, the several slaps reddening the skin. 

"Let me go," Jisung cries out, "I don't want to be around you anymore. I hate you!"

" _ Ouch _ ," Minho sarcastically responds, "The person who was afraid that  _ I  _ didn't love them anymore is now the person who says that they hate me." 

"Loving you was a mistake!" Jisung pinches Minho's hand; the other finally let go because the words seem to have wrecked him. 

Jisung picks himself up and darts for the stairs. He carefully and quickly gets down the stairs and only slows down once he is out of the building. He plops down onto the bus stop bench and mentally curses at the bus wanting it to move quicker somehow. He shakes his legs in anxiousness, worried that Minho would hurry to him. He probably wouldn't. 

When at the door of his dorm, he presses in the password with his shaking fingers but unintentionally pushes the wrong numbers. He lets out a sigh and tries to enter the passcode again but fails to press the correct numbers. Now he mentally curses at his trembling hands, wanting it to somehow stop shaking. 

Hyunjin opens the door, and immediately Jisung latches onto him despairingly and tightly. He cries uglily against Hyunjin's warm chest. "Oh goodness, It's Minho, isn't it? What happened?" 

"M-Min-" Jisung parts from Hyunjin's body and bites onto his bottom lip to hold his cries. "H-He broke up with m-me." 

"Fucking hell…" Hyunjin seethes and draws Jisung inside. He closes the door and presses his back against it. "What did he say? I can tell he hurt you so much." 

Jisung covers his mouth with his hand and shakes his head, signaling that he couldn't answer questions anymore. Hyunjin steps forward and pulls Jisung against his body. Jisung grips onto the back of Hyunjin's shirt tightly. 

Minutes pass, he stops crying, reducing from heavy sobs to light sniffles. Hyunjin gives him a pitying glance and swipes away Jisung's tears with his thumbs. "Now, will you tell me?" Hyunjin asks tenderly. 

Jisung sighs, drags out his cracked phone, types in the passcode, and pulls up Minho's text message. He hands his phone over to Hyunjin, the taller boy's eyes growing wide, then they narrow. He is  _ mad _ .

The anger Hyunjin shows scare Jisung; he has never seen the other this angry before. 

"Hyunjin?" Jisung whispers cautiously. Hyunjin doesn't budge, his gaze fixed on the phone.

"Hyunjin?" Jisung tries again; tears gather in Hyunjin's eyes, and with a single blink, they slip and travel down his pale cheeks. Jisung touches Hyunjin's arm; the tall boy hands Jisung his phone and heads for the door. 

Jisung knows what this means; Hyunjin wants to confront Minho. 

When Hyunjin touches the knob, frantic knocks (likely from Minho) sounded, and Jisung's breath hitches. "I think it's Minho…"

Hyunjin turns his head over to Jisung and gives him a look of concern. 

"Jisung! Open the fucking door!" 

Jisung moves to hide under his bed. "Tell him that I'm somewhere else."

"Okay." Hyunjin opens the door, and Jisung could hear Minho breathing heavily and quickly. He must have rushed here.

"Where is Jisung?" Minho questions. 

"I don't know where he went. I thought he was with you," Hyunjin replies attempting to sound clueless. 

"I don't know what's wrong with him! He came by at my place and yelled at me! I don't even-" Jisung hears a smack emit loudly and hears Minho's pained groan. He shuts his eyes, pulls his knees to his chest, trying to make himself smaller. Tears flow out of his swollen eyes again, and he tries not to make a sound. Even if Minho broke his heart, it hurts him to hear Hyunjin beating him up. He wants to do something about it, like stop him, but couldn't.

"This is what you get for hurting Jisung! You cause him so much pain-" Another smack, "-why did you treat him like shit?" 

"I didn't treat him like shit!" Jisung hears a thud, more smacking, and groans. This is getting too far; Jisung gets out from underneath only to see Minho on the floor struggling beneath Hyunjin. 

Minho's lip is swollen and bleeding, blood streams out of his nose, and his cheek is red. Jisung's bottom lip wobbles, and he looks at Hyunjin angrily. "Get off of him! Don't hurt him!" 

" _ Don't hurt him? _ But this shit hurt you badly!" 

"I didn't!" Minho shouts and cranes his head to Jisung, "What kind of fairytale did you tell Hyunjin?"

Hyunjin scoffs. "Once open a time, a boy named Minho texted Jisung to meet him at the café, Jisung waited for Minho, but he didn't end up showing up. Then Minho texted him, telling him that he wanted to break up with-"

"What the fuck! I didn't send any text!" Minho shoves Hyunjin off of himself and quickly stands up. 

"Stop playing innocent, you dumb fuck, you fucking did," Hyunjin states. 

Minho takes out his phone and shows both of them proof that he sent nothing. Jisung furrows his eyebrows; he is a tad bit confused but extremely skeptical. Minho probably deleted the messages himself; if that's the case, then he is very dumb for doing that. 

Jisung pulls out his broken phone and finds Minho's messages still there and shows them to Minho. "You see this? Are you lying to me?" 

"Jisung, sweetie," Minho says - the word 'sweetie' making Jisung so warm that he might end up melting into a puddle - and he holds onto Jisung's hands. Jisung looks at Minho's face then looks away, the injuries hard to take into his gaze because of how much it guilts him. Maybe it would have been better if he didn't tell Hyunjin anything. "I wouldn't tell you to meet me at a café. I would come here and take you there. And I wouldn't ever text you to break up with you." Minho lets go of Jisung's hands and cups his face. "I am never breaking up with you. I love you so fucking much. I think someone hacked into my phone and sent those messages. My phone keeps on acting up even though it's pretty new." 

"I'm sorry for what I did," Jisung whimpers.

"It's okay, sweetie, you just misunderstood."

"I jumped to conclusions and hurt you with my words." 

"But you let me speak about it just now. Jisung, I'll be okay just as long as you tell me that loving me isn't a mistake." 

"Loving you will never be a mistake," Jisung replies; tears forming in his eyes. 

Minho slides a hand into Jisung's hair and looks at him lovingly. "I will never hurt you. I want you to feel safe with me. Do you believe me?"

Jisung nods and sobs. 

"Sweetie, don't cry." Minho lets out a sigh and wipes away his tears. "Can I kiss you?"

"Please do," Jisung whimpers. Minho presses his lips against Jisung's softly, giving him a gentle kiss. Jisung cries harder, which leads to Minho wrapping his arms around him, pulling Jisung closer to his body. 

Jisung makes him sit down on his bed, and he rushes into the bathroom to get things to treat Minho's wounds. He wets a cotton ball with rubbing alcohol, and Minho hisses and grabs Jisung's wrist when he cleans his lip with it. 

"Almost done. I'm so sorry about this. It's all my fault," Jisung says and starts cleaning the dried blood from Minho's nose. 

Minho places his hands on Jisung's hips. "It's alright. You shouldn't even be the one apologizing. It should be Hyunjin. He just has to ruin my face." 

"I'm sorry, I just was angry...but sorry for overreacting and hurting your face," Hyunjin apologizes.

Minho rolls his eyes and lays down once Jisung finishes tending his wound. "I'm going to sleep here tonight." Jisung automatically beams, and Minho chuckles. 

\--------

Jisung sits down at an open table at the cafeteria and immediately takes out his laptop from his bag to start his homework early. Now time management is crucial for him, and he needs to get so much done before evening hits because of practice. He doesn't want to have so much to do once he returns from the tiring practice at midnight. 

"Hey, Jisung," he hears Changbin say, and he looks up to see the shorter boy sitting across from him with his lunch. 

"Hey, how are you doing?" Jisung asks and returns to typing away quickly at his laptop. 

"I'm doing well," Changbin replies, "How were you yesterday night? You didn't show up to practice, which was odd of you. Chan is mad at you, we both called you, but you didn't pick up." 

"Ah." Jisung shifts his gaze from his laptop to look at the unimpressed expression on Changbin's face. It makes Jisung nervous. "Something came up, and I completely forgot about the practice and fell asleep." 

"You're so careless," Changbin says and sighs, trying not to sound angry, "Do you not care about the practice at all? Is sleep much more important to you? Good luck dealing with Chan." 

"It sounds like he must be angry at me." Jisung frowns.

"Who is angry at you?" Minho asks and sits next to Jisung. The brunette slides Jisung's laptop to himself and looks over the assignment Jisung was working on. 

"Chan," Jisung answers, "I didn't show up to practice yesterday, as you already know why." 

Minho purses his lips and nods. "I'll take you to practice today." 

\--------

Which gloom Jisung approaches the dance practice room with Minho trailing behind him. 

"This building is so clean and pretty on the inside. Do you know if I'm allowed in the cafeteria? I want to try organic food." Minho randomly talking is somehow helping Jisung feel so much calmer on the inside. And the fact that Minho is with him and willing to deal with Chan makes him feel protected. 

Before opening the door, Jisung turns to Minho. "Thank you for coming here with me."

"Anything for you." 

Jisung smiles at him, opens the door, and spots Chan going over the dance while Changbin was just lounging on the couch with his phone. Jisung closes the door behind him and places his bag against the wall. When he turns around, Chan is right in front of him with a pissed off look on his face. He is the scariest when he is angry, and Jisung doesn't like it. 

"Why didn't you show up yesterday?" Chan questions, disregarding Minho, who stands next to Jisung with his arms crossed over his chest. 

"Something came up, and after that, I didn't feel well." 

"You need to show up no matter what fucking happens! Our debut is nearing, and you shouldn't slack off and avoid the practice. If you are sick, show up and deal with it! If you are sleepy, still show up and fight through the sleepiness! You need to start taking practice seriously, or else you will fall behind! Do you want that? Do you want to fail?" 

Jisung presses his tongue at the roof of his mouth, attempting to fight back the urge to cry. "No." 

Minho clears his throat. "Jisung was suffering emotionally yesterday because he was deceived by someone who hacked into my phone. That person was pretending to be me and left Jisung waiting at the café for me. He even texted him that I was breaking with him. After all that pain and crying, do you think he was mentally ready to handle rigorous practice?" 

"Is that why you are here, Minho?" Chan raises a brow. "To speak for Jisung and be his emotional support?" 

"Watch your mouth!" Minho says threateningly. 

"Don't speak for Jisung," Chan asserts. 

"Chan, I'm sorry, I won't miss practice anymore, I will be more responsible," Jisung states, steps away from them and begins stretching. 

As the three of them practiced, Minho would keep his gaze fixed on Jisung; it made him feel shy and happy as he loved being all of Minho's attention. 

\--------

The next day after class, Jisung suggested that he and Minho go to Jihoons place and have him look at Minho's hacked phone since he is an expert with technology. 

They arrive at Jisung's older brother's place. When he opens the door, his eyes immediately fall on Minho. His gaze darkens, clearly showing how unhappy he is to see Minho here.

"Are you Jisung's boyfriend?" he asks, coldness circling his voice. 

"Yes," Minho replies boldly. 

"We are good now, Jihoon Hyung," Jisung states and gives him a warning look, not wanting him to say any more things that could potentially make Minho feel bad. 

"Oh, okay." Jihoon lets them in. The three of them sit down on the couch. "What brings you two here at this time?" He asks. 

"Jisung said that you are very good with tech stuff," Minho replies and pulls out his phone, "Someone hacked into my phone and pretended to be me."

Jihoon flashes him a look of worry. "Unlock your phone and give it to me. I'll check it out right now." 

Minho does as told, and Jihoon starts searching for the problem. After about five minutes, he looks over at Minho with concern. "Is it okay if I take your phone to my cybersecurity team? Your phone is definitely hacked by someone, and it looks pretty bad." 

"Yeah, you can," Minho responds, "This sucks. I wonder who this person is, that is against me." 

"It'll hopefully be figured out, don't worry about it." 

\--------

Minho comes out of his bathroom after taking a shower. Out of habit, he looks around his living room for his cats. It makes his heart hurt whenever he remembers that they are no longer here; he sighs and shakes his feelings away. He shouldn't grieve anymore; it is going to make him feel horrible. Being alone in this apartment is awful enough. 

Minho wants Jisung to live with him here, but the boy prefers being at the dorm with Hyunjin. 

He can't do much about it; he can't force Jisung to be here. 

Minho sits down on his couch and starts drying his hair with his towel. He can't be alone here; he  _ needs _ Jisung here or at least a pet. 

Should he adopt a cat? Minho thinks about it for a few seconds. 

He wants to adopt a cat with Jisung. It will be such a memorable and cute moment. It would be so fun if they both could be parents of a cat together. That thought brings a smile to his face.

Since he doesn't have his phone with him right now, he decides to facetime Jisung with his laptop. 

After about a few seconds, Jisung answers the call, and Minho smiles at the sight of Jisung. "Hey there," Minho says softly. 

"Hi," Jisung replies. 

"I was thinking about adopting a cat with you. What do you think? Should we go to the shelter together and adopt a cat?" Minho asks him. 

"Do it! Do it!" He hears Hyunjin shout. 

Jisung turns his head over to Hyunjin and shoots him a quick glare before looking at Minho again. "Are you sure about this? After what had happened?"

"It's all okay now, Jisung. I really want to adopt a cat with you."

Jisung's cheeks dust with red. "I'd like that. I can't wait! When do you want to go?" 

"Tomorrow since it's a free Saturday. There isn't much for you to do, right?"

"Yeah, I'm free. Let's go first thing in the morning! I'm so excited!" Jisung cheerfully replies and smiles big. 

\--------

Morning arrives; Minho happily picks Jisung up and takes him straight to the nearby pet shelter. They get inside, and Minho tells the lady seated at the front desk that they want to adopt a cat. 

She directs them to a room with all cats, and the two boys begin seeking a cat they would like. Minho looks until his eyes settle at a grey cat that is resting on its pillow. The cat looks at Minho and rolls onto its back. Minho smiles at it. 

Minho feels Jisung's arm snake around his shoulder, and he turns his head to him. "Should we adopt this one? You seem to love it a lot," Jisung asks with a smile. 

Minho happily nods as a response. 

He tells the staff lady his choice, she nods and leads them to a cozy room and places the cat on Minho's lap. Jisung runs his fingers through her fur, falling in love with her. 

They adopt her, fill out the paperwork, and head right home. 

"I'm glad to have a cat here in my apartment again," Minho chuckles and places Haru onto the floor. She immediately starts examining around. "I guess I will need to place the cat toys out again." 

"You kept them?" Jisung asks, appearing very surprised. 

"Yeah, I stored them in a closet just in case I would need them again, and now I do."

"Let's take some of them out so that Haru could play with them." 

"Yeah." Minho smiles. 

Jisung finds a squishy toy mouse and approaches Haru. He kneels near her and wriggles the toy rapidly. "Do you want to play with this?" He asks her in a cutesy voice. The cat promptly perks up and meows, and Jisung gives her the toy. She begins attacking it with her paw. "Aw, she loves it." 

"Just like how I love you," Minho says and hugs Jisung from behind. 

Jisung turns around and pecks his lips. "I love you too." 

\--------

Minho finally got his phone back but couldn't keep it for any longer. Jisung's older brother, with so much seriousness in his voice, informed him that the cybersecurity caught the hacking. It had actually been going on for months now, and the person messed with many things on his phone. 

Jihoon told him that it's best to change all of his passwords to whatever accounts he has and switch to a new phone and number. 

So here is Minho, sitting on the living room couch, packed with sadness while writing down all the numbers saved in his contacts onto a new notebook. He then proceeds to transfer all his photos to his laptop. 

Minho tosses his useless phone aside after finishing all the work. "This was so stressful and tiring," Minho says to Haru; the 1-year-old cat ignores him and continues playing with the mouse that Minho concluded was her favorite toy. 

His phone sounds; he sighs irritatedly and picks it up from where it landed. He sees a message from a random number. Without any hesitance, he opens up the text.

Unknown Number [9:54 PM]: Want to know who the pest is that took your backpack and turned your life upside down? It's no one else but this jealous Felix. 

The person sends Minho evidence __ that Felix was the one behind everything. It was a picture of Felix grabbing Minho's navy blue backpack with that long-gone plushie. 

Minho's blood boils, and he presses the tip of his tongue against his cheek, trying to subdue the boiling taking place within him. He shouldn't burn yet; he needs to save it for tomorrow when he sees Felix at the dance club. 

Lee Felix, a soft-hearted and considerate person that is loved by almost everyone, kicked Minho into the dark. He killed his cats, tormented him through texts, stole his notebook,  _ and  _ presented it to the police, which forced him into the hospital against his will.

Lee Felix took his life and ripped it into pieces with no mercy at all, over something he was jealous of. 

What the fuck was he even jealous of? There is nothing for him to be jealous over. 

"Fucker, just wait, I'm coming for you," Minho growls and drops his phone onto the couch, "I'm going to make your life hell too." 

\--------

Minho steps into the dance club; he doesn't even acknowledge Ten, Yunho, and Mingi and brushes past them when they come up to greet him. He throws his bag against the wall and sits down, tilting his head back so that it is pressed against the firm and cold wall. 

"Minho, you good there?" Ten walks to him and squats in front of him; Minho glares at him angrily even though Ten didn't do anything wrong, "You look like you are in a bad mood." 

"A bad mood? Is that what it looks like to you?" Minho scowls; Ten's expression contorts into anger. He hates being talked to disrespectfully, but Minho doesn't care about that right now. What he cares most about is for Felix to get here fast so that he could fucking torment him back. "I'm fucking pissed off, Ten!" 

"Don't talk to me like that, calm down," Ten responds exasperatedly, "Tell me why you are this angry." 

"It's Felix! I fucking hate him because he had the nerve to ruin my life!"

"Felix?" Ten widens his eyes.

"Why do you sound surprised? Is he innocent to you?" Minho snaps, "Some people can be fakes and pretend to be all nice and sweet. You need to be aware of that." 

"Thank you for informing me, but please don't let this anger get the best of you. The club will start-" Ten checks the time on his phone, "-in two minutes. Don't get into a fight with him. Hurting someone else doesn't solve anything. If he did something horrible to you, he shouldn't even be worth your time. Now pick yourself up and get ready to present the activity." 

Minho doesn't reply but lifts himself from the floor anyway. 

When it's time, the students come in. Amongst the students, he finds Felix talking cheerfully to Hyunjin. Minho gets ready to confront him; he pulls up the picture he was sent and approaches the two of them. 

"Hey, Felix," Minho starts. Hyunjin and Felix both stop talking and look at Minho. Hyunjin's smile dropped in a flash, showing how unhappy he is to see Minho. Felix's smile quickly fades away as well when he sees Minho's pissed off appearance. 

"Hi, Minho, what's wrong? You don't look so happy," Felix questions. 

"Minho is always like this," Hyunjin cuts in and rolls his eyes in contempt. 

"Shut up, Hyunjin," Minho says sternly without wavering his eyes from Felix's fear-stricken ones. "And Felix, thank you for putting in so much effort with ruining my life. You broke me well." 

"I-I don't understand," Felix stammers, tears gathering in his eyes, and they release immediately. Of course, he is going to play innocent; Minho is not going to let him win. 

Minho shows Felix the picture, and his face loses it's color so fast. He looks so ill now all of a sudden. Hyunjin widens his eyes and covers his mouth in complete shock; he looks at Felix and then back at Minho's phone screen. "See, Felix, all because of you, my life is ruined! You took everything away from me! I can't believe I trusted someone so fucked up as you! Why did I fool myself with that fucking fake-friendliness of yours." 

Suddenly the whole practice room goes silent; everyone is staring right at them. 

"M-Minho I-I-" Felix couldn't finish his sentence and started crying hard. 

Minho looks at all the concerned students. "Felix is a murderer." And walks away and out of the practice room. 

\--------

Seungmin is in the middle of watching a drama when he hears the code to the door being entered. He pauses the video and turns to the door, a smile ready on his lips. Felix opens the door and quietly steps inside. 

Seungmin's smile disappears when he notices how puffy and red Felix's eyes are and how depressed he looks. "Felix, are you alright?" 

"Yes," Felix replies and pulls on a smile; it looks so forced.

"Are you sure? Don't hide things from me, Felix. I'm your best friend. I know when you are upset about something. Come on, tell me." 

"Seungmin, I'm fine. I just rubbed my eyes because they felt itchy. I rubbed a little too harshly," Felix says and laughs afterward. "What were you doing?" 

"Oh, I was just watching a drama. I barely started the first episode. Would you like to watch it with me? We can both sit on my bed," Seungmin asks, hoping the other would agree and watch with him. 

"Seungmin, thank you. You're such a great friend to me, you are so kind, but I don't feel like watching anything right now. I want to start on my assignment. Maybe we can watch something together next time?" 

Seungmin pouts, he wasn't too happy with that answer, but he nods anyway. "I guess I will just watch on my own." He turns back to his laptop and pressed play. 

"Are you okay with me opening the window? I need some fresh air," Felix speaks. Seungmin turns to him, giving him a confused look. He never really opens the windows for fresh air. Maybe he needs air right now. 

"Yeah, you can. You didn't even need to ask," Seungmin replies and turns back to the laptop. Seungmin hears him sliding open the window and lets in the air. 

Felix breaths in dramatically. "Ahhh, just how I like it." 

Seungmin giggles, and then everything inside him freezes when he sees in his peripheral vision that Felix was climbing onto the window. "Felix!" Seungmin rips from his desk chair and rushes to the window. It was too late; Felix let himself fall. He landed right onto the grass, blood seeping out of his head. 

Seungmin's eyes fill up with water; he shatters into billions of tiny pieces. He should have known right when Felix came inside that he wasn't okay. Seungmin feels like he is such a stupid person and best friend. 

He rushes out of his dorm, takes the elevator down to the main floor, sprints out of the building, and slows down when he finds where Felix landed. Students surround Felix, and Seungmin pushes through them and crashes onto his knees by Felix's body. 

He cries hard as he begs for him to not leave. 

Felix shouldn't leave. 

Seungmin won't get through his life if the light isn't present with him. 

The paramedics arrive, immediately rushing to the scene. They asked Seungmin questions, but he wasn't able to answer as he was crying very hard. They take Felix away, and Seungmin comes along. They say Felix will likely not make it through because of the severity of his head damage. Seungmin only cries harder. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *sighs* Sorry about the ending :(( Felix may or may not survive, we'll see in the next chapter. I've already started writing the beginning of the next chapter and it's so sad. The rest of the chapter is going to be extremely agonizing :(
> 
> I hoped you enjoyed this dark and sad chapter!


	31. Take me down

Felix ends up in the ICU (Intensive Care Unit) in a critical condition because of his head injury. After Seungmin's sobs calmed down, he manages to tell the doctor everything that happened. With the information provided, they immediately ran scans on Felix to check in with his brain. Based on the results, the doctor said there is a slim chance of survival. Seungmin couldn't let their words sink into him; he wants Felix to survive - he has to!

They say it would be great to communicate with Felix because he might actually hear, so that's exactly what Seungmin does when the doctor leaves. He drags his chair close to the hospital bed and touches Felix's cold hand. "Please be okay, okay?" He lays his hand over Felix's as a way to warm it. "You mean so much to me, and I will break apart without you. I want you to wake up healthy and okay." 

Tears fall out of Seungmin's eyes, and he gives Felix's hand a gentle squeeze. "Your birthday is next week. I want to celebrate it for you. You deserve a huge celebration, and I will give it to you. We can have so much fun, it can be only you and I, or we can call the others too if you want. I will buy you so many presents with the monthly allowance I saved up." 

Seungmin stays silent for a few minutes - repetitively staring at the monitor, then at Felix's tranquil expression, and back at the monitor. He decides to speak again when he starts feeling a little lonely without Felix's voice. "I wasn't a good friend to you, was I? I should've known you weren't okay." 

He sighs. "I know you-" Seungmin couldn't complete the rest of his sentence as his face scrunches in extreme pain his heart was bringing him. Plentiful amounts of tears spill out of his eyes, heavy like a waterfall. "I-I know you are finished with fighting internally and want to leave already." He presses his wet cheek against Felix's hand. "But stay, even if you want to leave."

\--------

Moving his food around with chopsticks is what he does ever since the start of his lunch. He doesn't even bother eating as all in his mind is Felix. He desperately wants to go back to the hospital to see Felix, but he has one last class to tackle. 

Seungmin eventually looks up when he notices someone approaching. It is Hyunjin who glares at him. "Stop playing with your food like that," Hyunjin scolds him and sits down across from him. "What are you sulking about?" 

"Nothing," Seungmin concludes and shoves the now sadly cold noodles into his mouth. 

"Nothing? It doesn't look like it, tell me-" the rest of his words are a blur; Seungmin begins to doze off, seeing Felix lying on the hospital bed alone. The thought of Felix being alone in such a gloomy, stress-filled hospital room brings Seungmin to tears. " _ Seungmin? _ " He pops out of his daze and quickly wipes away the tears he felt on his cheeks. "Are you okay?" 

Seungmin shakes his head. 

"Can you tell me what is wrong? I don't like seeing my Seungminnie so sad." Hyunjin frowns. 

"Felix...he isn't okay," Seungmin responds.

"Yeah, I know. Yesterday Minho got mad at him for something he didn't do. Daekhwa was the one that told Felix to grab the backpack and likely was the one that took a picture of Felix taking the backpack to frame him. Daekhwa always has evil intentions," Hyunjin says, "Minho called Felix a murderer in front of everyone and left like that! Everyone in our dance club disgustingly looked at Felix and whispered with each other, making him feel so horrible of himself." 

Seungmin's heart rips itself; he doesn't know what to say to this; this is all a shock to him. Felix went through something so horrible! He is innocent yet was framed by a cruel person. Seungmin looks down at the table, his tears peppering onto the surface. That's why Felix came back to the dorm early with puffy, red eyes and such a soulless look. 

Hyunjin leans forward a bit. "After the dance club, I came by your dorm to check in on him, but neither one of you answered. Is Felix okay?" 

"Hyunjin." Seungmin looks at the other through his tear-filled eyes. "Felix is in the hospital." Hyunjin's eyes grow wide, and his mouth falls open. "He jumped from the window of our dorm and is now in a coma." 

Hyunjin starts crying, and Seungmin stands up; he needs to get away from here; he feels strangled. "I-I'm sorry, Hyunjin, I'll get going now. I will text you which hospital F-Felix is at." Seungmin hurries away to cry in the bathroom before heading to his final class. 

\--------

Jisung closes the door. When he attaches his gaze onto Hyunjin, he notices the other staring right at him expectantly. Jisung doesn't even know what he should expect, only that Hyunjin doesn't look so happy. Immediately Jisung begins questioning anxiously, wondering what he did wrong. 

"Did you see the group chat?" Hyunjin asks, his tone matching the displeased look on his face. Jisung shakes his head and swallows in apprehension. "Maybe you should keep it unmuted in case someone is talking about something important."

"O-Okay, I'll check," -  _ why do you have to be so petty about it? _ Jisung wanted to add in as well, but forget it, he doesn't want to piss him off much more. 

"No, no need to. I'll do you a favor by telling you. Listen up, buddy," Hyunjin scoffs and gets off his bed to approach Jisung. "Your boyfriend that you love so much and won't break up with is the reason why Felix is in the hospital in a coma! Felix attempted suicide!  _ Why? _ Because Minho shamed him in front of everyone at the dance club, he called Felix a murderer when he did nothing wrong! It was all Daekhwa's doing! I fucking hate your dumb ass of a boyfriend! He jumps to conclusions fast!" 

Jisung felt a whole swarm of emotions rip his chest open and settle its way in. Even though he feels so miserable, he could tell Hyunjin felt worse than him. Jisung catches how tears are filling up Hyunjin's pain-glazed eyes and pour down his cheeks. 

"Jisung...as your best friend who knows a lot about you and your relationship with Minho, I need to tell you how I feel, whether you like it or not. It's my truth. Let him go, please. You are so naive. Your love for Minho is so strong but think about his behavior. Minho is your trap. He's been aggressive to you and abusive. Break up with him before it's too late."

"He apologized to me," Jisung replies meekly.

"He is a monster, Jisung," Hyunjin states, his tone freezing with seriousness. Anger stacks up inside of Jisung.

"Minho is not a monster, don't call him that. I love him, he loves me, and he would do nothing to hurt me," Jisung replies with just as much seriousness; he is so done with Hyunjin's stupid worry. 

"Open your eyes, Jisung. You love a control freak!" 

"Control freak? You're the one being a control freak, telling me to break up with Minho." 

"Because I care about you!" Hyunjin shouts.

"Care about me?" Jisung rolls his eyes, showing off the intense amount of loathing he has towards Hyunjin. "Consider us done, Hyunjin. I don't want to be friends with someone who insults my boyfriend."

"A boyfriend that destroys people," Hyunjin adds bitterly, "And us no longer best friends? Fine by me. I don't want to be friends with someone who is dating someone who hurt Felix. I guess you care more about Minho than the wellbeing of Felix." 

"You're such a liar! This whole conversation wasn't about your concern for me, wasn't it?" Jisung scoffs, his own tears falling, "You hate Minho because he hurt Felix. You just want me to break up with him because you hate him. It's nothing about me. You just hate the fact I'm dating someone you just resent. Way to go, Hyunjin!" 

"Ji-"

"Fuck off." Jisung turns for the door and leaves the dorm. 

He arrives at Minho's place, knocks intensely at the door, and has to wait for a minute until Minho finally opens the door. He is in such a poor state, his hair messy, his eyes puffy, he has been crying hard. Jisung meets his eyes and sees gloominess settled there. 

"Why did you-"

"I know...I know…" Minho sighs. "Please don't talk to me about it, okay?"

"I need to talk to you about-" 

"Sorry, Jisung." Minho sighs and brushes back his hair in stress. "Another time, I need some time to myself." He places his hands on Jisung's waist and presses a quick kiss against his lips. 

"Are you sure?" Jisung asks, worried that Minho wouldn't be fine by himself. Minho just nods, desperately wanting Jisung to leave already. Jisung feels a little hurt by that frantic gaze, but he doesn't say anything and turns away. 

He arrives at a restaurant to indulge in some food, thinking that eating would keep his mind away from things. It didn't. As he ate, all he thought was about Felix, wondering if he is okay. Minho really should control himself and not afflict so much anger. Jisung sighs. He needs someone to talk to. But is there anyone out there? Anyone besides Hyunjin? 

Would Jeongin understand? He doesn't even know what is happening. Jisung decides to call him anyway; he just needs someone to vent out to. 

Jeongin told him to meet him at his dorm, texting him where it is located. 

Jisung gets there. It's his first time seeing Jeongin's dorm, and it's so neat and nicely decorated. His bedsheets are a pastel blue, and there is one stuffed teddy bear on the side of the bed by the wall.

Jeongin takes Jisung's hand in his and urges him down onto the bed. "So, what is going on?" 

Jisung tells him everything, and Jeongin looks at him with wide eyes. 

"Felix is in the hospital because of Minho? I-" Jeongin sighs before continuing, "-I think Minho is out of his mind, alongside Hyunijn. Although I love Hyunjin, I have to be honest, Hyunjin has no reason to be angry with you. You have nothing to do with Minho or even Felix. Just because you are Minho's boyfriend, it doesn't make you worthy of blame and hate." 

Jisung feels comforted by those words, but he knows that nothing is going to change. The anxiety in him tells him that they aren't going to understand him and continue hating him because he is glued by Minho. 

"You don't look like you're feeling good at all," Jeongin says to him worriedly, "Do you need to rest a little? Maybe you will wake up refreshed?" 

"Yeah, I'm so tired," Jisung replies. 

Jeongin stands up and gestures to the bed. "Go ahead, lay down." Jisung sighs and lays down. Jeongin pulls the smooth comforter over his body. The warmth engulfs Jisung's body, not because of the comforter but because Jeongin was so kind.

"Can you wake me up in an hour? I have to get to practice at 6." 

"Alright, nap well," Jeongin replies, patting his shoulder. Jisung sends him a tiny smile and closes his eyes. 

\--------

"Jisung." 

"Mmm?" Jisung groans and turns to his side, wanting to gather in some more sleep. 

"Uh, good morning?"  _ Good morning?! _ Well, that sent alarms straight into Jisung. He gets up in one swift motion and looks at Jeongin in a panicked way. Jeongin flashes a toothy smile at him. "You slept pretty well."

"You didn't wake me up!" Jisung whines, close to crying. He is going to get in so much more trouble; he isn't responsible after all. He couldn't believe he missed another practice. 

"I tried to, so many times, but you wouldn't even budge. You were sleeping heavily. I think you needed it, so I just let you sleep. You are stressed out and should recover. You can go to practice today and explain your situation."

"If they understand." Jisung sighs and crosses his arms over his chest. 

"Don't freight about it, okay?" Jisung nods. "So, do you want to shower and get changed? You can borrow my clothes." 

"I'll pass. I don't think Minho would like it if I wore someone's else clothes and smell like someone else," Jisung says and releases a little laugh, "He is already under so much stress. I don't want to add to it. I'll just change and shower in my dorm." 

Jisung heads to his dorm, letting Jeongin come along with him. However, Jeongin doesn't step inside and only leans against the wall beside the door. Jisung knows why; he couldn't face Hyunjin, and Hyunjin couldn't face him. 

Jisung doesn't find Hyunjin on the bed or at his desk. He turns his head to the bathroom door, and underneath the door is light, letting Jisung know that Hyunjin is in there. Jisung will just shower when he returns from practice tonight. 

He goes to his closet, picks out his clothes, and strips from the one he has on. The bathroom door opens when Jisung is putting on his shirt. Once correctly on, he spares the tall boy a glance, who looks at him emotionlessly.

"Where were you yesterday?" Hyunjin asks. 

"Why do you care?" Jisung snaps back. 

"Jisung, I'm sorry about what I said yesterday-"

"Cut the crap." Jisung grabs his backpack and heads for the door. 

"Jisung, please!"

"No,  _ Jisung, please's _ ," Jisung imitates, "What you said about Minho yesterday is enough to make me resent you." He heads to the door and opens it; he could hear Hyunijn step right after him, but Jisung continues his way. He only turns to him when he is out of the dorm. "Close the door for me, thank you."

Hyunjin peeks out and notices Jeongin by the wall beside the door. His expression changes completely. It is a mixture of irritation and shock, and Jeongin doesn't seem to take it in well as he looks visibly wounded. "What the hell are you doing here?!" Hyunjin screeches at him; Jeongin couldn't say anything and looks at Jisung, seemingly wanting him to answer for him. 

"I brought him here with me," Jisung says, "We are friends now." 

Hyunjin doesn't seem pleased with those words. "You're only friends with him to make me irritated!" 

"We have been friends since weeks ago," Jisung corrects, "Let's get going, Jeongin." 

The two boys head to the school's cafeteria and order their breakfast. At first, they were silent until Jisung broke it apart by asking Jeongin a question. "Where did you sleep?" 

"I fell asleep on my chair," Jeongin responds and drinks his orange juice. Oh no, he must have been so uncomfortable; Jisung pouts a bit at that thought, and Jeongin gives him a tiny smile after placing his glass of orange juice down. "It's fine, Jisung. Sometimes after long hours of studying, I end up falling asleep in my chair. It's nothing too bad for me. I think I'm growing used to it." 

"Jeongin, it isn't good for your back," Jisung scolds, but not in a strict tone, more in a pitying way. 

Jeongin smiles at him. "Don't worry so much, I'm fine." 

\--------

" _ Jisuuung _ ," Minho calls out for him in a whiny tone, a tone that makes Jisung lift his head from his arms and look at the brunette. Minho places his backpack on the ground and his water bottle onto the table. He plants himself at the empty chair next to Jisung, wraps an arm around him from behind, and quickly kisses him on the cheek. He shouldn't be doing this in public because it would be risky for Jisung, but thank goodness he isn't well known yet. "How are you doing, my baby?" 

"I'm not doing too well," Jisung replies and gives Minho a big frown, "How are you? Are you okay?" 

Minho starts laughing overdramatically. "Everyone hates me. I'm a criminal. I made Felix end up in the hospital. I'm so stupid. Jisung, do you think I'm stupid?"

"No, you aren't stupid. You just were stressed out and hurt," Jisung says reassuringly, "Don't be so harsh on yourself." 

Minho starts laughing again, and this time Jisung feels so weirded out. "I should've known it was Daekhwa. That fucker always makes me mad." He picks up his bottle, unscrews the cap and takes in a few sips, and lets out a satisfied sigh. "It's too late to turn things back now." 

Jisung looks at the bottle in complete suspicion and then moves his gaze away when he notices Seungmin approaching them. The youngest sits across from Jisung. "Hey, guys," he says in such a soft voice, Jisung could hear the pain in it. 

" _ Seungminnie! _ " Minho whines, "You aren't mad! Aw, that's a relief." 

"I am mad at you, Minho," Seungmin asserts. Minho pouts and leans back against his chair. "Why wouldn't I be?" He looks at Jisung. "Jisung, are you alright?"

"No." 

"Does my Jisung need a big hug?" Minho coos, "I'll give you one. It will make you feel better." He pulls Jisung in for a hug; a hug from Minho is something Jisung would always want. However, this hug feels so suffocating because Minho isn't acting like himself. Jisung knows Minho's actions right at his heart. If Jisung were to be upset, Minho would demand answers and later give him a hug.

Jisung pulls away from his body and returns his gaze at Seungmin. "Are you well?"

"No," Seungmin answers, then stays silent momentarily, likely thinking about what to say next. "I'm sorry about Hyunjin and Changbin. They have no reason to be mad at you, yet they are. I want to let you know that I love you-" he narrows his eyes at Minho, "- _ As a friend  _ and that I will be here for you at all costs. Tell me if Hyunjin or Changbin act up."

"Thank you, Seungmin. I was so worried that you'd be mad at me too, because...almost everyone is, except you, Jeongin and Minho." Jisung sighs. 

"And Chan," Seungmin adds, "You didn't visit Felix yet, right?" Jisung shakes his head. "You can come by whenever you are free. But just tell me, because Changbin is going to be hard to face alone." 

"O...okay," Jisung replies, not sure if he should even go. 

"Hey, hey, don't sulk. I'll be there too, don't worry." Seungmin lays his arm on the table, his hand open for Jisung to grab. Jisung grabs his hand, and the younger gives it a squeeze. 

When the younger leaves, Jisung turns to Minho, who gives him a big smile. It's so weird of him to do so after how terrible he was feeling yesterday. "Now, back to you," Jisung states.

"Yaaay! I want so much attention from you." Minho giggles and does a small dance. Jisung glances at the water bottle and connects it to Minho's weird emotions. He really is acting so unlike himself; he wouldn't be acting cheerful like this. In that bottle is definitely alcohol. 

"Minho, are you drinking?" Jisung asks, pointing at the bottle.

"Yeah, I need to stay hydrated." Minho smiles. "You should do the same. Your lip looks so dry, should I lick it?" 

"You're not using alcohol to stay hydrated, Minho, don't act foolish! You're using it to cope!" Jisung scolds him.

"No, no, Jisung, please don't be mad at me!" Minho whines and grabs Jisung's hand, "I'm sorry!"

"Please don't drink, okay? It will only do you harm." 

"It's not harming me, Jisungie, it's helping me, hehe." Minho laughs. "It's keeping me going ever since morning." 

"Wait! You drank it before coming here?" Jisung screeches. 

"Mhm!" Minho confirms.

_ Oh hell fucking no.  _

Jisung's eyes filled with tears. "Why are you doing this to yourself? You could've gotten into an accident. You are definitely not driving home today!" 

"Then how will I get home?" Minho whines. 

"The bus," Jisung replies and wipes away his tears, "Or I can call Chan to drop you off. Which one?"

"Both!" 

Jisung rolls his eyes and takes out his phone to call Chan. The other doesn't answer. It makes Jisung think that Seungmin was wrong about Chan not being mad. Jisung feels so much hurt now. 

"Chan didn't answer? Guess I will have to take the bus," Minho says and then laughs. 

Minho shouldn't walk alone, so Jisung decides to sacrifice his last class and take Minho home. They took the bus to Minho's stop and exit. Minho would walk with so much difficulty and stumble occasionally. 

"Are you okay?" Jisung asks. 

"Mmmhmmm," Minho groans out. 

"No more alcohol, okay?" Jisung sighs. 

"Baby, I'm so sleepy."

"We're here," Jisung says and starts pressing in the code. He takes Minho inside and straight to his bedroom. He helps him get on his bed and takes off his shoes. "Can you manage by yourself?" Jisung asks just to make sure. 

"No," Minho says and pouts, "I want you to stay here with me and sleep with me. I want your warmth."

"I mean...I do have a few hours until practice," Jisung says and takes out his phone and sets his alarm to 4. He puts his phone onto the nightstand and gets into the warmth of Minho's bed. 

The older boy rolls his body to Jisung, wanting to get closer to him. Jisung smiles at him and places a hand onto Minho's waist. Minho's eyes shut, and Jisung kisses him on the nose. Jisung falls asleep as well. 

Jisung wakes up to his loud alarm, and he quickly grabs it and turns it off. He checks to see if Minho is awake, and he is - looking at Jisung through his eyes that dust with restlessness. "Sleep well." Jisung leans to kiss his forehead. The older responds with a soft hum and shuts his eyes.

Jisung arrives at practice, and the terrible atmosphere dawns over him. He quietly places his bag down and approaches the two. "Okay, do we go over the dance?" he asks, only to attract a conversation because he feels so awkward with this unpleasant silence. 

They just ignore him; Chan walks to the computer and turns on the song. It immediately blasts through the speakers. 

They continuously practiced the dance. It was peaceful - a little -  _ okay _ , maybe not too peaceful because Chan and Changbin are acting as if Jisung doesn't exist in this room. It makes Jisung feel so horrible and heartbroken. 

What broke his heart more was how Changbin was behaving around him. He would stay several feet away from him, and Chan, being the leader of their group, didn't do anything about it. 

When Chan announces a break time, Jisung approaches Chan. "Are you mad at me? You didn't answer my call today." Chan spares him a glance before walking to sit next to Changbin. Jisung's eyes fill with tears, and he runs out of the practice room to head to the bathroom. 

Why must they ignore him like this? He feels so much hurt. 

He covers his face with his shaky hands and cries into them for a few minutes. When calm, he parts from his wet hands and leaves the stall. Jisung approaches the sink and looks at his reflection in the mirror, and sighs. He washes his face to make it seem like he didn't have a crying session in the bathroom. 

Jisung returns to the practice room to deal with another two hours filled with this negative energy that he wanted to run from. 

"I don't get it!" Jisung eventually shouts, tired of their actions that were only inflicting so much pain in him. He needs their words; he needs their reasons. "I don't get why you two are mad at me! I did nothing wrong! If you two are going to act like this, then don't even consider me your teammate! I fucking quit! Find another trainee to take my place. I'm so tired of this shit!"

Changbin storms up to him, only to punch him in the face, releasing all of his rages. " _ Quit!? _ What the fuck is wrong with you dickhead! We are nearing our debut, and you here are wanting to quit? After all the practices we've been through, you just want to tarnish the hard work we put in? Can't you stop acting like a child and take things seriously?" 

"Changbin, stop it," Chan approaches the two, "Don't fight. Let's finish practice and head home." 

Changbin ignores Chan and continues targeting Jisung. "Pick your fucking ass up and practice you brat!"

"How am I supposed to practice properly when I feel so much hurt!"

"Deal with it!" Changbin shouts and pushes past him. Jisung watches him leave the practice room before he turns his head to Chan. 

"I'm having such a hard time, but I guess it doesn't matter to you. I called you earlier, but you didn't pick up, nor called me back. Minho is having a hard time as well, but I guess you don't care about that either because he hurt Felix. Minho made a big mistake. He is regretful, and look at how he is dealing with it! He is indulging himself with alcohol. He isn't the same anymore. He drove to school while drunk! He attended classes while drunk! This is all taking a toll on him! I called you to ask you to drive him home, but you-" 

Chan curses and sprints out of the practice room before Jisung could complete his sentence. Jisung immediately follows after him until they stop at Chan's car. Before Chan get's inside, he looks at Jisung. "You want to come along?" 

Jisung nods and gets into the back seat of Chan's car. 

They head to Minho's place; Jisung unlocks the door and steps inside. He finds Minho on the couch, petting his cat. 

When Minho notices Jisung and Chan at the door, he places his cat down and approaches the two. 

First, he looks at Jisung and gives him a heart-warming smile, then he looks at Chan and gives him a heart-freezing smile. He looks back at Jisung, his lips curling up again. "Hey, baby, how are you doing?"

"You woke up and drank more, didn't you?" Jisung asks. 

Minho nods. "I can't help it! It's the only-"

"Thing that keeps you going," Jisung finishes his sentence for him. "How much did you drink?" 

Haru meowing and leaping out of the couch, pulls Jisung's attention away from Minho. She rushes over to Jisung and looks up at him in such a pity-bringing way. "What's wrong?" Jisung kneels in front of it and pets the cat on the head. Haru gives in to the touch and then backs away, meowing loudly - trying to inform Jisung of something. His confusions are answered when Haru rushes straight to the kitchen. 

"Did you forget to feed Haru?!" Jisung screeches at Minho. 

"I...uh...yeah…" Minho says with blatant shame.

Chan steps to Minho and slaps him in the face; Minho looks at him with wide eyes, which fill with tears. Jisung would scold Chan for hitting Minho but chooses to focus on Haru instead because she is starving. 

"Why are you drinking and forgetting to take care of yourself and your cat? With what you did, I can't forgive you, but I beg for you to stop doing so much harm to yourself!" Chan shouts at him. 

"Stop pretending to care about me!" Minho wails, "I don't want you here! Get out! Only Jisungie can stay!" 

"You disappoint me, Minho," Chan finalizes before shutting the door loudly. 

Jisung finds canned chicken in the cabinet for Haru and puts it in her bowl. "Enjoy," he says sweetly to her and then fills her other bowl with water. "I'm sorry that Minho isn't taking care of you properly." He lowers himself to his knees and strokes Haru's back as she eats. 

"I'm sorry," he hears Minho say with his tone full of dismay. Jisung stands up and heads to him, immediately placing his hand on the injured cheek. 

"Stop with the drinking," Jisung says to him, his eyes fogging with tears, "For me?" Minho lowers his head onto Jisung's shoulder, his arms snaking around Jisung's back.

"Am I a murderer?" Minho asks, his voice breaking, "I feel like I am one." 

Jisung shuts his eyes, the tears slipping out instantly. Much to his dismay, he couldn't find a proper answer to the question. Minho starts sobbing, and the only thing Jisung could do was to hold onto him tightly. 

"Ugh, I feel like throwing up," Minho groans, and Jisung sighs but takes him to the bathroom right away, letting him puke into the toilet. 

After finishing, Minho rests his cheek against the seat, his tears dropping out of his eyes. He is in so much pain. 

"Do you want to go to the hospital?" Jisung asks; Minho manages to shake his head. 

"I want to go to bed." Jisung helps lift Minho so that he is standing and leads him to the bedroom. 

Jisung places him into bed and tucks him in. He then leaves the bedroom to check up on Haru, and he finds her on the couch sleeping. Jisung takes off his hoodie and places it over her. She opens her eyes, shifts a little before closing them again. He checks the food bowls to make sure she finished and then goes back to Minho's bedroom and slips into his bed. 

\--------

The first thing Minho sees when he wakes up the next morning is Jisung's beautiful face, looking so peaceful as he sleeps. He touches his jaw and notices a giant bruise on his cheek. Panic rushes straight into Minho; he must have hit him again. Shit! How can Jisung remain here and sleep with him after getting hurt? 

Minho's eyes fill with hot tears, and they spill out. He hates himself. He is nothing but a hurricane, destroying others with his malice and lack of control. 

Jisung's eyes open and meets Minho's teary eyes. He quickly sits up. "Minho, are you okay?"

Minho sits up as well and places his hand on Jisung's injured cheek, rubbing his thumb softly against the bruise. "Did I hit you?" He asks, his voice sounding frail. 

Jisung's face immediately pales, and he moves his eyes away. "No, you didn't," Jisung responds with a blatant lie. 

Minho could see the lie all well on his face and tried to hold in the anger bubbling frantically inside of him. He doesn't want to explode and hurt Jisung more. 

"Are you lying to me?" Minho lets out his words in a softer manner, not wanting to make Jisung uncomfortable. "You don't have to hide things from me." 

"I'm not lying to you. You really didn't hit me. You wouldn't." Jisung returns his gaze to Minho's eyes, looking more genuine about his words now. Minho now assumes that the paleness from seconds ago was because Jisung was shocked that Minho caught the bruise. How could he not? It's so big and obvious. 

"Then how did you get that bruise on your cheek, sweetie?" Minho asks. Jisung looks hesitant about replying; Minho knows that Jisung isn't going to answer his question thoroughly and would beat around the bush. Jisung is always like this.

"Someone else hit me," Jisung answers, and Minho waits for him to provide more information, but the younger doesn't. Now the bubbles of anger in Minho's stomach are untamable and are heading upwards. 

They run out of his mouth. "Who the fuck is that person?" Minho growls. 

Jisung flinches a tiny bit and looks down at his lap. "Don't worry about it. It's my fault, anyway. He was mad." 

_ Oh my fucking god! _ Minho screams in his head. He needs to know which person hit Jisung on the face over something they were angry about. It's something that Minho has to worry about. He needs to screw up that person. 

He grabs Jisung's shoulders. "Tell. Me. Who. Hit. You. It's not that hard! Just say their fucking name!" 

Jisung doesn't lift his head, but Minho knows he upset him a lot because he could see his tears dropping out of his eyes; he went a little too far. "I don't want to ruin your friendship with him," Jisung mutters. Minho removes his hands from Jisung's shoulder and lifts Jisung's head. 

"Baby, that doesn't matter." Minho sighs. "I don't want to be friends with someone who hurts my Jisung. You are my top priority. You come before everyone. So tell me who it is."

Jisung stays silent for a few seconds and then speaks. "I will only tell you in two conditions. One, you can't go to that person and do anything to do them, and two, you need to stop drinking." 

Minho doesn't know why he is shocked by those words, but he is. He wants to confront the person who hurt Jisung. He couldn't give up alcohol - it keeps him away from his torturing feelings and reality. But for Jisung, Minho nods because he needs to know. "Okay, now tell me."

"Changbin punched me because I said I'd to quit the group. He was mad because of the effort we put in. I understand, though, I'm trashing all of our efforts right at the brink of our debut."

Minho hits the mattress and stands. "That piece of shit!" 

"Minho, please don't be angry-"

Minho cuts him off, "I don't give a shit, Jisung! He hit you! I'm so fucking mad!" He grabs his hair and tugs at the strands. He wants to strangle Changbin for hurting Jisung. 

"Please don't do anything." Jisung points out. "It's going to make things so much worse. We all are going through stress."

Minho narrows his eyes at Jisung. The younger is right; they are going through stress because Felix is in the hospital, but the fact that Changbin hit Jisung doesn't sit well with Minho. He will make sure no one lays a finger on him.

"Are you hungry? I'll cook you something." 

"Oh yeah, speaking of that, now that you are sober, I would like to inform you on what you did to Haru." At Jisung's statement, coldness coats over Minho. He did something to Haru? "You weren't feeding Haru! She was so hungry yesterday. When was the last time you fed her?"

"I remember giving her breakfast yesterday. I don't remember giving her anything else. I'm sorry for neglecting her. I was so caught up with only myself and drinking that I forgot about everything else."

"Minho." Jisung sighs, the sadness in that sound sending chills down Minho's spine. The boy gets out of Minho's bed and steps over to him, resting his hands onto Minho's hips, drawing his body to him. "Don't do this to yourself, okay? I know you are upset, but it makes me upset to see you harming yourself like this. I know the others are upset with us, but let's not let it hurt us too much, yeah?"

Minho furrows his brows; they are upset with Jisung too? What did he even do? 

"They turned against you too?" Minho asks.

Jisung nods. "I only have you, Seungmin and Jeongin."

Minho tenses at Jeongin's name. "Jeongin?"

"Don't worry, he is nice to me now." 

"You shouldn't fully trust him." 

"Minho!" Jisung whines and lightly hits him on the arm, "He really is nice. He helps me."

Minho thinks about it for a few seconds and nods. "Okay, I will think about opening up my trust for him again. However, if he breaks your trust or hurts you again, then consider him done." 

Jisung nods, and Minho presses a kiss against his forehead. For seconds they stay attached; the only thing pulling them apart is the growl from Jisung's stomach, signaling his hunger.

Jisung's face turns a light shade of red from the embarrassment, and Minho chuckles. "I cook you something." 

"I'll cook  _ us _ something," Jisung replies with a bit of sternness, "I want you to eat something too." 

"Fine." Minho sighs. 

\--------

A twitch of Felix's hand sends Changbin's gaze from out of his phone. He looks at Felix's face, trying to find life behind it. There is nothing behind the resting expression, and Changbin sighs, thinking that he must have been hallucinating. He lowers his gaze back to his phone only to see Felix's move his arm up to his head. 

Changbin rips from his chair and dashes to Felix's bed. Tears of happiness and relief streaming down his cheeks. "Felix! You're awake! You are okay!" 

"Wha…" Felix sits up, and suddenly his face contorts into pain. "It hurts! It hurts so much!"

"What hurts?"

"Shut up!" Felix grabs his head. "Can you please get someone!" 

"Y-yes!! Changbin rushes out of the hospital room, and down the hall, he sees Seungmin. He would tell him about the great news, but not right now. He needs to get the nurses. 

The nurses head to Felix's room, and Changbin follows after, only to be stopped and told to wait outside. He frowns and slumps down onto the chair. Seungmin sits down next to him and turns his head to him. 

"Changbin, what happened?" Seungmin asks, on the verge of crying. 

"Felix woke up," Changbin announces, and his own tears fall off. 

Seungmin wraps his arms around Changbin, happy giggles coming out of his mouth. It enlightens Changbin and makes him smile. "When can we see him?"

"When the nurses are done with checking upon him." 

\--------

An hour later, after his checkups, the doctor claims that he is fine now and just needs to stay for one more day before freely being able to return home. Felix receives a pill for his headache and consumes it with a cup of water. 

When Changbin comes inside, Felix's heart tugs in a way he didn't want it to tug. Why is it doing this?

It tugs harder when he sees Seungmin step in after him. Felix pulls on a smile despite the sadness lingering in his heart, and both boys smile back. Changbin approaches him, his hand's cup Felix's face, and he leans in for a kiss. Felix wraps his arms around the other, kissing back hard, even though there is no spark left within him. 

Changbin pulls away, and Seungmin - like a joyful puppy - quickly latches onto Felix, and that's when Felix begins to feel this warmness soak into his skin and light up his insides. 

"Felix, I'm so happy that you woke up," Seungmin cheers with glee, "Are you feeling better now?"

"Mhm," Felix replies, his headache is less prominent, "I had a bad headache, but with the medicine they gave me, it helped." 

"I'm glad you are okay," Seungmin says and pulls away. 

"Oh and…" Felix looks down at the blanket that only covers his lower half. "I'm sorry for doing this to myself and bringing you all so much pain." 

"Felix, don't be sorry." Seungmin frowns at him. 

"But there is one person who is dealing with so much pain," Felix states. He heard some things while being away. "Changbin, apologize to Minho." 

"Wait, how did-"

"If I understand how Minho feels, so should you." Felix stares at him in disappointment. "You said pretty mean things. I heard some things."

Changbin gives him a look of shock, and then it falters into guilt. "I don't know...after what he did, I don't think I can understand how he feels. He hurt you, sweetheart." 

Felix didn't like that last word anymore. 

He wants to feel affected by it, but that isn't the case for him anymore. Changbin's love feels empty to Felix. 

\--------

Gloom eats up Jisung entirely as he lays on his bed. It's a selfish kind of gloom he feels - today, like every other year, is the day he wants infinite amounts of attention. Jisung just has this hole in his heart that needs to be fulfilled, but it couldn't. No one remembers - not even Minho, which hurts Jisung a lot. 

Why even want this when everyone is over at Felix's, comforting him? Jisung doesn't have anything against him; he loves that sunshine a lot, even though the other likely doesn't feel the same for him back anymore. 

Night shadows over; Hyunjin returns; Jisung looks at him; the other looks back at him then lands on his bed, taking out his phone immediately. Even he doesn't remember. But what can he say? They aren't technically friends anymore - they mean nothing to each other anymore. 

Jisung tries to convince himself that it is okay and that it's the same every year, but it doesn't work out - he just has to fulfill his heart's desire all alone. He gets off of his bed; he'll just celebrate it alone by buying a cake at the convenience store and sorrowfully eat it all alone. 

He gets out of his bed, tugs on a hoodie, keeping the hood at his head. 

Knocking sounds at the door when Jisung approaches the door, he opens it and finds Minho there. 

"I'm going to steal you," Minho says and kisses him. He closes the door and holds onto Jisung's hand; they start walking down the hallway and wait for the elevator. "How was your day?" 

Jisung's day wasn't so good, but he isn't going to tell Minho that. "It's was okay." 

"Liar," Minho whispers to him, and when the elevator door opens, both step inside. The doors close, and Minho pushes Jisung against the wall, his lips close to his ear. "But that's okay because I'm going to make tonight memorable for you, baby." 

\--------

When Jisung steps inside Minho's apartment, his heart begins to beat so much, and his eyes start to fill up with water. The living room is decorated so nicely with birthday decorations. Jisung quickly turns around to face Minho, giving him a smile with his tears. 

"Do you like it?" 

"Yes," Jisung whimpers. 

"Happy birthday, baby." Minho wraps his arms around Jisung, lifts him, and spins him around. 

Minho places him back down and leads him to the kitchen; the table filled with so much food and cake is at the center. Jisung gives the older a confused look. "Wait..this is so much food. Will we be able to finish it?"

"Ahh, well, any minute, my  _ loyal _ and  _ mature _ friends will be here. I hope that's okay, you already know them. They are sweet, so don't feel nervous," Minho says, and Jisung hears knocking on the door. "Here they are." Minho laughs and approaches the front door. When he opens it, a group of people rushes in. Jisung recognized them as Seonghwa, Mingi, Yunho, San, and Ten. They all immediately place presents on the living room coffee table. 

"Woo-hoo! Happy birthday, Jisung!" Mingi bumps Jisung's fist. 

"Happy birthday, cute boy," Seonghwa says and pulls Jisung into a hug. Jisung looks at Minho and sees that he is standing there, boring his eyes onto Seonghwa's back. 

"Hwa, that's enough," Yunho laughs, "Minho is going to explode." 

Seonghwa laughs softly and pulls away from Jisung, and turns to where Minho stands. "Okay, okay, sir, Jisung is all yours." 

They all gather at the table, everyone sings Jisung 'happy birthday,' and they immediately begin eating and talking. They really are such sweet friends - perfectly, perfect. 

"These two are such a cute couple," San says and points at the two of them. Jisung blushes and looks at Minho, who looks at him too and gives him a big smile. 

"They really are so perfect for each other," Ten agrees. 

They finish their food and lead Jisung to the living room where all the presents are. 

"Jisung, open my present last," Minho says and places a hand on his shoulder. 

"Saving the best for last, huh?" San teases, "Okay, go on, Jisung open the presents." 

He opens all of the presents; they were such sweet gifts, and Jisung thanked them several times, saying that they didn't have to and that birthday wishes were enough. 

After that, Minho urges Jisung to open his present. Jisung picks up the pretty box and carefully opens it - Jisung's eyes grow wide and fill with tears yet again. 

Jisung covers his mouth with his hand, trying to stifle his cries, and Minho starts crying as well. He pulls Jisung's hand away from his mouth, lifts a ring from the box, and slips it into Jisung's ring finger. 

It is now Jisung's turn. Minho wipes away Jisung's tears and takes the box from him. Jisung picks up the ring, and with his free hand, he takes Minho's right hand and slips the ring into Minho's ring finger. 

Minho's friends all start clapping and cheering gleefully. 

After about a few minutes, Minho and Jisung were finally the only two remaining in the apartment as Minho's friends left to give the two some privacy. 

Jisung stares at Minho through his tear glossed eyes and the other places one hand onto Jisung's cheek and the other on his hip. 

"I love you, Minho," Jisung softly mutters. 

Minho kisses him on the tip of his nose and then on his lips. With their lips only centimeters away, Minho replies with an, "I love you too," and gives him another kiss. 

This was the best. Birthday. Ever. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I guess this chapter didn't turn out to be that sad because I decided to spare Felix after a lot of deep thinking :'D 
> 
> I hope you liked this chapter even though it is pretty rushed :( Finals week is killing me.


	32. The beginning of an end

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Attempted rape, sexual assault, and blackmailing (if there is anything else I need to include as a warning please let me know)
> 
> If you are uncomfortable with those warnings mentioned above please don't read. 
> 
> This chapter is a huge pain :(

On the living room couch, Minho lies with his arms wrapped around Jisung, who sleeps harmoniously against his body after a tough day of practice. It's past midnight, Minho should be sleeping as well, but he didn't feel sleepy. He couldn't bring himself to sleep because his worries were keeping him attentive. 

His worries are all generated by Jisung. It's not actually Jisung's fault; it's just that Jisung debuting next week makes Minho sick in the stomach. He really wants to be proud of his boyfriend, but the thought of having Jisung away most of the time makes Minho very upset. 

What if their relationship drifts apart because of how busy Jisung would be? Or what if it drifts apart because Jisung would be more interested in his debut than Minho? Or what if he decides to follow the dating ban? Being together is the riskiest thing ever, and it would hurt not only Jisung but his entire career. 

Eventually, the living room enhances with the morning light, notifying Minho that it's sadly/finally morning. He frowns at the thought of no sleep and hopes that he could manage throughout the day in this condition. 

He hears Jisung softly groan, indicating that he is in the process of waking up. Jisung raises his upper body a tiny bit and peers at Minho through his barely-open eyes. 

"Minho…" Jisung mutters, his voice groggy, "You're already awake?" 

Minho only hums a yes and rubs Jisung's back. The sleepiness disappears from Jisung's eyes, and he moves off of Minho to stand. He focuses his gaze on Minho and doesn't say anything; it's as if he is trying to figure something out. 

Minho throws him a look of confusion and stands up. "What's wrong?" 

"There seems to be a lot going on in your mind," Jisung answers. 

Minho takes a single step towards him - closing their distance - and ghosts his lips at Jisung's. "You are in my mind. You're always in my mind." Technically it isn't a lie; after all, Jisung was in his mind for hours. 

Jisung smiles at Minho, pleased with that answer. "You're in my mind as well, and take up my whole heart." He wraps his arms loosely around Minho and gives him a quick kiss. "But please tell me what  _ really _ is going on in your mind." 

"You."

"No, no, no. Don't lie to me. What's with the stressed-out look on your face?"

Minho didn't feel like telling Jisung; his words are all going to show how selfish he is. However, with that curiosity and eagerness within Jisung's attentive gaze, Minho knows that he isn't going to escape until he lets out his feelings to Jisung. "I- well-" Minho cuts himself off, traveling back into his thoughts - telling Jisung is going to be so hard. Jisung lifts his brows - Minho has to do what he has to do. "I'm scared that starting next week, I wouldn't be able to kiss you, hold you, be with you like how we usually do. I feel like your debut is going to make us distant." 

Jisung hugs Minho tightly. "Don't worry so much about it. Even if I am busy, I would never let us become distant from each other. I will find a way to fill in some time for you." He pulls away from Minho and peers at him. "I also have something to say and need your opinion on it. It's been in my mind a lot."

"Okay, tell me."

"It's about Hyunjin." Jisung sighs stressfully. "I'm a bit angry at him because he said those mean things about you, but he seems regretful about it. I know how much it hurts him not to be friends anymore because we were together since high school. He always looks so sad. Do you think I should talk to him and be friends with him again?"

"Jisung, this isn't something you ask me. It's something you need to decide on your own. I don't want it to seem like I am controlling you, nor do I want to make decisions for you. You are you Jisung, you make your choice, do what you think is right and would benefit you," Minho states. 

Jisung puckers out his lips a little, and then he nods, "You're right. I will think about it." 

Minho gives Jisung a quick kiss on the head before returning to the couch and pats at his thighs for Jisung to sit on. The younger smiles at him brightly and then move to sit on Minho's lap. "I wish I could mark you everywhere. But the others would see." 

"I know…" Jisung softly says, and his smile turns into a suggestive smirk, "Maybe you can mark me where no one could see? I really want your lips on my skin." 

Minho places his hand on Jisung's inner thigh. "Over here?" he asks as he rubs the clothed area. Jisung's cheeks faintly dust with pink, and he nods. Minho stands up, hooking Jisung's legs around his waist, and he takes Jisung to his bedroom. 

\--------

Hyunjin sees Jeongin heading in the direction of their stats lecture, so he picks up his pace to catch up to him before Jeongin gets inside the class. When he is near enough, he taps him on the back. 

Jeongin turns around, and there is a flicker of joy in his eyes. "Hi." 

"Hey," Hyunjin replies a little bit bashfully, "Uh...so I suppose you and Jisung get along now, am I right?" 

"Yes," Jeongin confirms. 

"That's nice," Hyunjin responds, pulling a small smile. The two say nothing for the next minute, they just stand there silently, and Hyunijn badly wants to say something else. He looks at the floor first, then past Jeongin's shoulder - his eyes stop everywhere else but not Jeongin's eyes. 

"Is that all?" Jeongin finally breaks their silence. 

Hyunjin sucks in his bottom lip, thinks briefly before nodding. Jeongin looks at Hyunjin one last time before turning away. "Wait!" Jeongin pauses and turns back around. Hyunjin hopes the other isn't irritated; there isn't any impatience or anger on him, so Hyunjin assumes he might not be annoyed. "Do you want to be friends with me?" 

Jeongin lets out a breath, a breath that contains nothing else but remorse. Hyunjin knows the answer - Jeongin can't bypass just by being friends with Hyunjin. It's like starting from zero. "Hyunjin...I-"

"You can't manage that?" Hyunjin cuts him off, "You want us to be more than just friends?"

Tears fill Jeongin's eyes, and he nods. A wretched sob escapes from him, which destroys Hyunjin. His heart clenches painfully. No way can they manage just by being friends - especially after what they've been through. 

"I-I'll go in now," Jeongin says softly and wipes away his tears. Hyunjin takes in a deep inhale and nods at him. 

\--------

Frequently, during dance class, Hyunjin would look at Jinyoung through the mirror. He tries not to. However, his eyes linger towards the handsome teacher anyway. Jinyoung just looks so good when he is focused and working hard - Hyunjin couldn't help it. 

Hyunjin's eyes go to Jinyoung once more, and barely after a few seconds, Jinyoung catches him staring. Hyunjin feels himself turn red, and he pulls on a shy smile. Jinyoung smiles at him as well before shifting his gaze away quickly. 

The smile itself makes Hyunjin assume he has a shot with asking his teacher out. It's stupid; how could that smile make him feel this way? Why does it make him believe that Jinyoung likes him back? Maybe he should confess already - yeah, Hyunjin thinks he should gather some bravery and get his feelings out of his chest. 

Therefore right after dance class, Hyunjin goes up to Jinyoung nervously. 

Jinyoung wipes the sweat on his forehead with the towel and tosses it, he was trying to aim for his backpack, but the towel landed inches away. "Hey, Hyunjin, how may I help you?"

"Um...I…" Hyunjin lowers his head when his face heats up badly. "I think I like you." 

Jinyoung chuckles. "That's good to hear. I don't want students disliking me." 

"N-No, I don't mean it that way," Hyunjin corrects, lifting his head to look at Jinyoung, "I like- no, I have had a crush on you since months ago."

Jinyoung's eyes slightly widen, then he smiles. "Is that so?" Hyunjin nods. "No wonder why you'd look at me a lot. You really like me a lot, huh?" Jinyoung grasps Hyunjin's waist and pushes him against the mirror. Hyunjin's heart quickens its speed; he could feel it thudding against his chest. Jinyoung's lips end up on Hyunjin's, and they share an intense kiss; Hyunijn is loving it so much, loving how good his teacher is at this. 

He opens his eyes when Jinyoung pulls away - the only thing temporarily connecting them is their string of saliva between their lips. Jinyoung slides his hands up underneath Hyunjin's shirt, and he brushes his thumbs against Hyunjin's nipples. 

"A-Are you sure about this?" Hyunjin asks, "I've just confessed."

"I'm sure," Jinyoung replies and pulls off Hyunjin's shirt. Hyunjin is very apprehensive about it. He confessed not too long ago, and now they are on their way to having sex. It's too fast for Hyunjin's liking. He closes his eyes when Jinyoung peppers kisses around his neck and chest. And while occupying him with kisses, Jinyoung palms at Hyunjin's bulge. 

"Jinyoung, I think we need to stop. It's too fast," Hyunjin mutters. 

Jinyoung stops with his movements and stares into Hyunjin's eyes. "Isn't this what you want? You always stared at me, hungrily. You wanted me."

"But I don't want this," Hyunjin says, tears sliding out of his eyes. 

"When he says stop, you stop, fool!" A familiar voice booms through the practice room. Hyunjin looks at the door and widens his eyes when he finds Jeongin partially inside; he steps inside. The door shuts behind him loudly, the sound echoing powerfully. 

"Fine then, Hyunjin, you were going to be a fling anyway," Jinyoung scoffs, "You're so pathetic." Hyunjin covers his mouth with his hand to prevent his sobs from escaping, but they force their way out. 

"Hyunjin is worth more than what you earn with your shit dancing," Jeongin snarls at him. 

Jinyoung doesn't say anything; he only rolls his eyes, moves away from Hyunjin rapidly, and goes to pick up his belongings. When he leaves the practice room, Hyunjin slides down onto the floor, pulls his knees to his chest, and grabs his hair, beginning to cry hard. He just felt so disgusting all over; he was kissed and touched by someone who wasn't even going to take him seriously. He was going to be used.

"Hyunjin…" Jeongin takes cautious steps to him and sits next to him. 

"Jeongin," Hyunjin whimpers, and in the corner of his eyes, he catches Jeongin wiping his own tears away. 

"Did he hurt you?" 

"H-He touched me, and I didn't l-" Hyunjin covers his face with his hands. Jeongin immediately comforts him by pulling his body against his. They stay like this for a bit until Jeongin withdraws from him; the warmness Hyunjin received from him was quick to disappear. Hyunjin moves his hands from his face. "Jeongin where-" Hyunjin quiets down when Jeongin puts his shirt back on him.

"I am not leaving," Jeongin assures, "I'm going to be here with you until however long you need me."

"Jeongin, can we get out of here? It's so suffocating to be here," Hyunjin whines, then wraps his arms around Jeongin, giving him a pleading look. 

Jeongin wraps one arm around Hyunjin, and he uses his free hand to brush through Hyunjin's hair. Hyunjin's body relaxes under the touch, and he lets out a sigh. "Where do you want to go?"

"I want to go to your place. I miss it," Hyunjin says. Jeongin pulls away and stands up. He gestures for Hyunjin to do the same, and Hyunjin quickly gets up. With linked arms, they head out of campus and eventually arrive at Jeongin's dorm. 

Hyunjin, from his spot, looks around Jeongin's dorm. It appears the same - clean and nicely decorated - it's comforting. 

Jeongin sets his backpack onto his desk chair and turns to Hyunjin. "Do you want to wash up? Especially after…"

"Yeah," Hyunjin says, "I feel so dirty." 

After finishing showering, Hyunjin walks to Jeongin, who sits at the edge of the bed - the other scoots back and spreads his legs. Hyunjin sits in between them, and Jeongin takes the towel from him and begins drying his hair. Hyunjin felt so soothed under his touch. 

With Jeongin, he feels safe. 

With Jeongin, he feels loved. 

Jeongin wouldn't use him. 

Because Hyunjin knows Jeongin loves him. 

Out of nowhere, Hyunjin's heart compels him to turn to Jeongin and place his hands on his shoulders. Jeongin looks at him in total shock and confusion. "Hyunjin, what's wrong?" Hyunjin doesn't say anything and just leans to the other's lips and kisses him. Jeongin gasps in surprise but then eases right away and lays his cold hands against Hyunjin's cheeks, pulling him close against his body. Fondness replaces the sadness Hyunjin felt earlier; this causes tears to slip out of his eyes.

Jeongin pulls away and wipes away Hyunjin's tears. "Do I still have your heart?"

Jeongin does have Hyunjin's heart; Hyunjin's heart was always there but turned off. Because of the loss of trust, his heart didn't want to turn on - for months. He denied and denied, thinking that Jeongin wasn't suitable for him, thinking that Jeongin would hurt him or anyone else. Recent events proved that Jeongin changed. 

"Jeongin," Hyunjin mutters, "Should I give you a chance?" He dips his head to Jeongin's chest, pressing his ear against it, feeling his warmth and the beats of his heart drumming against his chest profoundly. Hyunjin closes his eyes, liking how Jeongin felt. 

"Do you think I deserve a chance?" Jeongin asks in a soft voice. Hyunjin moves away and looks at the desperation, painting Jeongin's features. 

"Should I give you a chance?" Hyunjin asks again. 

Tears slip from Jeongin's eyes, and Hyunjin quickly grabs Jeongin's face and swipes away the glimmering droplets. "Please do," he says, "I want to be with you so badly- I always wanted to be with you- I missed you- I missed everything about you- I promise that I will good for you- I won't hurt you anymore-" Hyunjin shuts him up with another kiss, this time it's much more of a harsher one; he wants to devour Jeongin, taste every single part of him possible. 

Several minutes passed- within those minutes, a lot happened. Their kiss got heated, Jeongin kissed and bit around his neck, claiming Hyunjin as his again, which Hyunjin liked a lot. Hyunjin craved to have sex with him again, but Jeongin denied it, but for a good reason; he didn't want to do it because of what happened. He wanted to give Hyunjin some time for recovery before doing anything else beyond the kissing and touching. 

"Can I use your laptop real quick?" Hyunjin asks. 

"Sure." Jeongin stands up and walks to his desk to pick up his laptop. He logs in and hands it to Hyunjin, who places it on the mattress and logs onto his University account. He chooses to drop out of his dance class with Jinyoung - he can not see Jinyoung the same again. 

Jeongin kisses him on the side of his head. "I think you made a good decision." And presses another kiss at the same spot. 

Hyunjin releases a satisfied sigh. "Thank you for coming there." He places his hand on Jeongin's knee. "But what were you even doing there?" 

"I thought about your question all day and decided that maybe I should just be friends with you. Of course, we are so much more now. I'm so happy," Jeongin giggles and presses a quick kiss against Hyunjin's nose, then continues, "I thought it would be best, and being friends with you would've let me be near you all the time. That's why I came over to your dance class and waited for you to come out so I can tell you that I did want to be friends with you. For some reason, all the students came out, and you weren't one of them. I thought that maybe you were talking to your teacher, so I decided to wait a little longer. When I got impatient, I decided to peek inside. There I found you, looking so uncomfortable while Jinyoung touched you."

"Oh," Hyunjin replies, and then he lets out a little laugh, "How did you know that I had that class?"

"I asked Jisung," Jeongin replies. Hearing Jisung's name pulls down Hyunjin's mood. 

"Oh," he simply replies, his reply coming out a little too gloomy. Jeongin now looks so worried. 

"What's wrong?"

"Thinking about Jisung makes me sad now," Hyunjin claims, "He doesn't like me anymore."

"Love, he was upset with you because you were being a little mean to him and said some mean things about Minho. Jisung came over here and talked a lot about the whole situation. He was so hurt," Jeongin says, and those words made Hyunjin's heart sink; he was so harsh to Jisung, Hyunjin just wants to smack himself. 

"I feel so bad now." Hyunjin sighs. "I want to talk to him, but I don't think he would even want to listen to a jerk like me." 

"No, don't think that," Jeongin responds, "Give it a try, okay?" 

"Okay," Hyunjin mutters; Jeongin smiles at him and pats his head. 

\--------

"Congratulations on your debut!" Jisung stops walking and turns to Daekhwa, who might have been following him; it's getting so annoying.

"Don't talk to me," Jisung tells him sharply, "Leave me alone." 

Daekhwa grabs Jisung's wrist, bringing in twice as much discomfort. Ever since he found out that everything was Daekhwa's doing, he acquired a fear of him along with sheer hatred. He messed up Minho's life and deceived him. "Come on, Jisung, I was congratulating you, and this is how you react? You should be happy." 

"I don't want you-" Jisung stops speaking when he notices Minho coming towards them. The brunette scowls when he sees the scene right before him. He turns off his phone and shoves it in his front pocket. 

He doesn't say anything as he approaches; he probably wants to sneak attack Daekhwa. Jisung shifts his gaze back to Daekhwa, who looks so confused; his grip loosening a bit, and Jisung uses this opportunity to yank away his wrist. 

Minho finally grabs Daekhwa by the hair and twists his head to him, giving him the darkest look ever. "Why did you come to Jisung?" Minho growls to him and throws him onto the floor. "I told you not to be near him, but you just had to, didn't you? Well, fuck you! I will give you what you deserve, you piece of shit!" Minho starts kicking Daekhwa's body, and Jisung just stands there watching Daekhwa scrunch his face pathetically. Jisung doesn't care about the damage being done, and a smirk grows on his face. 

"You will pay for this, Minho!" Daekhwa yells and then groans afterward when Minho sends him a kick to the waist.

"There is nothing for me to pay for," Minho replies and steps away from Daekhwa's suffering body. He grabs Jisung's hand and pulls him away from the area quickly, and they head straight into the bathroom.

"Did he hurt you?" Minho asks and loops his arms around Jisung's waist. 

"He grabbed me. It made me uncomfortable," Jisung replies with a slightly whiny tone.

Minho gives him a sorrowful look. "I should've found you faster. I'm so sorry." 

"It's okay." Jisung smiles. "Thank you for teaching him a lesson. He really needed it." 

Minho chuckles and kisses Jisung's forehead. "I would do anything for you." He then drops his smile and gives Jisung a slightly serious look. "I don't want us to meet up in that area anymore. I don't actually have a problem with it, it's beautiful, and all, but Daekhwa always seems to find you there as you two used to hang out there." 

"I just like looking out the window under the warmth of the sunlight," Jisung replies bashfully. 

"You can't anymore, baby," Minho says and removes himself from Jisung, "You okay with that?"

"That's fine." 

\--------

"Minho~." At that voice, Minho quickly looks up from his phone and finds Felix sitting across from him. Seungmin plants himself in the chair next to Felix's. Minho swallows dryly in nervousness; he couldn't see Felix the same way anymore; it brings him so many reminders that he didn't want in his head. It torments him and makes him feel guilty. 

"Thank you for paying for the large hospital bill," Felix states and sighs afterward, "Sorry for putting you under a lot of pressure. I shouldn't have harmed myself like that. I made you end up-"

"Felix." Minho sighs with sadness. "Don't apologize to me. It is all my fault. I take full responsibility for my actions. I'm sorry about what I did to you, for days I felt so horrible of myself. I hope me paying for the bills show you how sorry I am for being the worst to you."

"Minho, thank you," Felix says and gives him such a warm smile, "You are the nicest."

"Pft, no," Minho says while shaking his head, "After what I did? I don't think calling me nice is the right word."

"Minho," Felix whines, "You paid-"

"To me, paying for the bill feels so small. I don't think I deserve to be friends with you. You deserve better friends, people who would treat you better than I can."

"Minho, don't say that!" Seungmin cuts in, "Know your worth Minho, we all make mistakes."

"Yeah, I agree with Seungmin, I know you don't feel happy with what you did, and I know your words were cruel, but I still forgive you," Felix states, and crosses his arms over his chest, "And you can't change my mind!" 

Minho only smiles a tiny bit before letting his lips fall into a flat line. Those supposedly assuring words aren't settling in Minho; his tormenting feelings are much stronger than those words that are meant to lift his heart. He opens his mouth to speak, but his phone sounding pulls him from saying anything. He looks at his screen only to find a text coming from an unknown number - Minho knows all too well that this is Daekhwa.

Unknown Number: Meet me at the dance locker room. I'll give you ten minutes, and if you don't come within that time frame, I'll expose the nudes of Jisung I got from your phone.

Minho's eyes widened in utter shock, and his heart drops. "Fuck!" 

"Minho, what happened?" Seungmin asks with worry. 

"Sorry, I have no time to explain right now!" Minho says quickly before standing up from his spot, grabbing his backpack, and running out of the cafeteria. Daekhwa is just so unstoppable; he goes on and on and on with no ounce of pity in him. He is worse than a monster. Minho will give him another good beating and wouldn't give a shit if he gets charged for assault. 

He arrives at the dance locker room and steps inside. He takes out his phone and puts it on voice-record so he can have some sort of evidence to show to the police. He wants Daekhwa behind bars. Minho turns off the screen and shoves his phone into his back pocket before starting to wander through each row of the lockers, trying to find where Daekhwa is at. 

He finds the silver-haired rat at the very back row, his back pressed against one of the locker doors. "Well, well, well. I guess you didn't want your precious nudes of Jisung to be exposed to the public. Is it all for yourself? You know sharing is caring. People will like them. Maybe he might gain more than he would lose."

"What do you-" Minho stops talking when someone else shoves a bag over his head, blocking his sight, "What the fuck!" he screams. No one says anything, and he feels several painful kicks and punches land on him. He groans in pain when his body gets slammed against the lockers. Due to the weakness and the pain he feels, he drops onto the cold and hard floor and heaves. The bag makes it hard for him to breathe, but he doesn't even take it off.

Mission: Beat Daekhwa up - failed. Minho feels pathetic. 

Someone takes the bag off him, and Minho tilts his head back to see two other boys - Daekhwa's companions. 

"Such a crazy bitch," Daekhwa mutters, "You never seem to give up, do you? Is it because of your never-ending love for Jisung? Well, sorry to break it to you, but that love must come to an end, Romeo." 

"Why do you care about our relationship so much? It's none of your business!"

Daekhwa kicks him on the stomach, forcing a groan out of Minho. "It is my business because you fucking showed up and took Jisung away from me. I read your whole diary, dumb-ass. It's so fucking sickening that you obsessed over Jisung. You are literally a disgusting human being. Jisung is probably with you out of pity because you can't ever seem to back away from him,  _ whore _ ." 

Those words cut up Minho's heart into pieces and ruined his self-esteem. Was he really whoring around during that time? Tears fill Minho's eyes, they want to leave, but he doesn't let them. He couldn't cry in front of Daekhwa and make himself look weak. 

“Break up with Jisung,” Daekhwa demands.

"No!" Minho screams at him, "I love Ji-"

"Shut up, freak!" Daekhwa swings his fist and hits Minho on the side of his head, almost causing him to blackout; he tries to blink out of it. He needs to remain stable and show Daekhwa how strong he is. "If you don't break up with Jisung, I'll move all the damage onto him. I will ruin his entire career by exposing all of these photos. It's funny how easily I managed to hack into your phone and get these interesting pictures. Oh, how much much fun the company would have trying to lie that these pictures aren't of him when it is. There is so much proof for the public. The pictures may not be the only things I send out. I may send out pictures I took of your diary and the messages between you and Jisung." 

"No, no, please don't do that to him! He is innocent! Just do whatever you want to me! Please don't hurt Jisung!" 

"Do whatever I want?" Daekhwa cocks his head to the side and stares at Minho curiously. It gives Minho a bad feeling, but he nods anyway - he'd do anything to keep Jisung safe. "Sounds like a plan. Break his ankle." Minho widens his teary eyes, setting the tears free. 

One of the boys began stomping furiously on Minho's right ankle and stopped their movements when there was a combination of a loud crack and Minho's cry of pain. 

Daekhwa smiles at Minho evilly. "This didn't satisfy me."

"T-Then what will?" Minho sobs and manages to stand up.

"I want you to break up with Jisung, or else I really will release the pictures and ruin his career." Daekhwa takes out his phone and presents Minho with all the pictures he's stolen from his phone. The images are apparent depictions of Minho's and Jisung's relationship, which can't be rejected. 

Minho snatches the phone from Daekhwa's hand in one swift motion and quickly breaks into a run even if his ankle hurts so fucking much. He fights through it but barely reaches the door when the boys grab him and shove him down onto the ground. 

"Help me!" Minho screams, hoping someone would come in here and save him, "Hel- mmph." Daekhwa presses his shoe against Minho's mouth, silencing him. One of the other boys takes the phone from Minho's hand and hands it over to Daekhwa. 

"Piece of shit! You acting up is going to increase my chances of revealing these precious pictures," Daekhwa scoffs and removes his foot from Minho's mouth, "You don't want to do that to Jisungie, right?" 

Minho starts sobbing, his heart wrenching up in so much pain; he doesn't think he has a choice. "F-Fine." Daekhwa ultimately smiles in satisfaction. "But please give me a month. I need some time to…" Minho's sobs grew heavier, and he had to take a pause to control himself. "To make him fall out of love with me." 

"Perfect." Daekhwa smile grows, and the three boys leave the locker room, leaving Minho to dwell with his pain. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So how do you feel? ;-; The end of this chapter made me so empty
> 
> This is so far the saddest chapter, and the next one? Even sadder :(


	33. Under his watch

Minho groans as he gets himself to sit upright. His body hurt all over as if a sledgehammer hit him everywhere. Amongst his body, the heaviest pain is the one shooting from his ankle. It pulsates so badly and feels so stiff. He twists his right foot to the side just to test it and scrunches up his face from the abundant amount of pain. 

Tears begin pouring off his eyes. Not because of the physical pain - it is one thing - but the heavy emotions he carries stabs him in the heart. He deems it acceptable to cry the hardest he could right now. No one would hear him in this empty and cold place that traps him. 

"Jisung... I'm so sorry, sweetie," Minho wails to himself, pathetically, "I'm so sorry that we are risks to each other." 

His phone sounds; he wipes away the copious amounts of tears that are heading out of his eyes and then reaches for his phone in his pocket, unlocks it, and sees the 'unknown number' on his screen. Daekhwa. Fucking, Daekhwa. And that bitch somehow got his number.  _ How?  _

Minho enters his password and stops the recording. Something in him tells him to do something about the recording just in case because it is literally a scarce piece of evidence. Minho sighs at that thought and manages to send the audio file to his email. Then he opens up Daekhwa's message. 

Unknown Number [1:10 PM]: This is all between you and me, Minho. Tell anyone and…

Daekhwa sends Minho an attachment. He frowns and taps on it quickly. Instantly a heavy file starts downloading, and once done, Minho opens the file and sees a series of pictures, all of them were of himself and Jisung. They are all the pictures Daekhwa obtained a while ago from Minho's old phone. 

Unknown Number [1:12]: Jisung's career goes bye-bye. 

Of course, that monster would use them against Minho. 

Minho powers off his phone and throws it against the locker angrily before letting his upper body drop back onto the cold floor. Everything is so fucking distressing; Minho's life is nothing but a violent storm he finds himself stuck in. 

Things were peaceful before Minho started his second year here at this University. In his second year, Jisung stepped into his life. After that, things for Minho fell little by little, ruining his life. Loving Jisung is apparently a sin for Minho. Loving Jisung leads to problems. Jisung isn't the one to blame; that beautiful boy is innocent in everything. The only problem was that Jisung met that silver-haired rat and, at some point, dated him. That silver-haired rat is horrible. That's it.

The door opens; Minho sighs in dismay because now he isn't alone. 

"I'm sure I left it in here!" Minho lifts his upper body at the voice and finds San making his way inside the locker room with Seonghwa trailing behind him with his radiant smile. San stops walking when he finds Minho on the floor. "Oh, holy shit! Minho, who did you piss off?"

Seonghwa's eyes bulge, and he hurries to Minho and kneels beside him. "Oh my god! You're badly hurt! What happened?"

"I just got into a fight, and he won, I lost, nothing too much," Minho states and laughs it off awkwardly. Seonghwa gives him a look of disbelief. Honestly, Minho wants to vent out the truth; he wants to talk so much shit about Daekhwa and have everyone gang up on him - but guess what? That'll risk Jisung's career. Although Daekhwa is a stupid piece of shit, he is brilliant when it comes to manipulating people to get what he wants. 

Minho wished he had the guts to just fucking destroy that fucker. 

"Dang, that person done some good damage on you, he is beast at-"

"San, this isn't something to joke about. Look how badly Minho is injured," Seonghwa warns the other, looking at him with fierceness. San purses his lips as a response. 

"It's okay, Seonghwa, it's not that much of a big deal." Minho shrugs. 

"Mmm." Seonghwa starts examining Minho's face. "I don't think a responsible person like you would get into a fight. I think someone assaulted you."

"Responsible, my ass," Minho responds and rolls his eyes. 

"San, can you call Ten? Get him to come here."

"No!" Minho suddenly shouts, "No, please, not Ten! He will get so mad at me and interrogate me!" 

"That's the point," Seonghwa asserts and slings an arm around Minho, "San, step outside and call Ten."

"Okay!" San replies and quickly heads out, leaving Minho with only Seonghwa by his side. 

"Wanna see yourself?" Seonghwa takes out his phone, takes a picture of Minho's face, and shows him. "You look terrible." The area around his left eye is bruised, and bruises also coat some spots of his face. He is sure there are several around his body too. Minho shifted his gaze down to his leg; he couldn't take in the sight anymore.

Seonghwa lets out a breath and rubs Minho's back. "Don't be upset. We'll try our best to help you."

After about a few minutes, Ten comes inside along with San, Yunho, and Mingi. He hunches in front of Minho and places down the first aid kit. 

"What the fuck did you get yourself into?!" Ten bellows. _ I got myself into a lot; you'd never know.  _ Tears assemble in Minho's eyes, and he wishes that they could disappear. When they fall, Ten's angry expression falls as well. "Sorry for sounding so harsh. What happened that led you to this?" 

"I got myself into a fight, that's it," Minho mutters.

"Who won?" Mingi asks. Seonghwa sends the tall boy a death glare, causing Mingi to raise his hands in defense. "Sorry." 

"Minho, why are you getting yourself into fights? You are so much better than that," Ten scolds him as he starts tending Minho's wounds, "Tell me what you even got into a fight for?"

"For fun," Minho states. Ten stops what he is doing and stares into Minho's eyes ferociously; Minho could feel himself shrink under that ice-filled gaze. 

"Take my questions seriously, you nut head," Ten responds with exasperation and resumes treating the wounds. 

"We wanted to see who was stronger, and I guess he turned out to be the stronger one," Minho says and makes his words sound convincing enough by providing a light laugh.

"Who is he?" Ten questions. 

"Why do you want to know?" Minho raises his brows. He would tell them who it is, but he couldn't risk it. Ten again sends a fear-brining angry stare.

"I'm sorry I don't remember the name of the person," Minho lies. 

"I know he is lying," Seonghwa mutters. 

“I am not lying!” Minho lies.

"Guys! I know why he might've got into a fight!" Mingi speaks. All of them except for Ten (who remains treating Minho's injuries) stare at Mingi for answers. "Maybe this prince charming did it for his boyfriend. He is always so protective of Jisung." 

"Minho, did you perhaps fight for Jisung?" Seonghwa shifts his attention back to Minho.

"No," Minho replies sternly. 

Once Ten finishes tending Minho's wounds, he puts everything back into his first aid kit and stands up. Everyone waits for Minho to stand up since he is the only one remaining on the floor. He knew standing up would be a pain, but he does so anyway and does it without expressing how painful it was. The next step is walking without showing any pain - Minho doesn't think he can cover the pain for that one up.

He starts following after Seonghwa but stops walking when Ten places his hand on Minho's shoulder. "You are limping. What happened there?" Ten asks.

"I fell on my ankle and broke-" 

"Liar," Seonghwa says. Ten kneels, rolls up Minho's jeans a little, and then rolls down his sock to inspect the injury.

He touches around with his cold finger and lets out an agitated growl. "Seonghwa is right. You are definitely lying about this. This injury doesn't appear as it resulted from a fall. It's an injury inflicted by someone else." Minho opens his mouth to counter Ten's claim but clamps it shut right away when Ten sends him another scary gaze. "Tell me the fucking truth, Minho." 

"Yes, the person stomped there, and I think he broke my ankle," Minho admits. 

"Thank you," Ten replies and looks at the four boys who are waiting patiently at the door. "Which one of you don't have class next?" 

"I do have class, but it's not that important to me. I have a high A anyway," Seonghwa says.

"Bragger," Mingi jokes.

"Okay, great, can you take Minho to the emergency room?" 

"Yes, right away," Seonghwa says, then approaches Minho and swoops him up, carrying him bridal-style. 

"Well, this is awkward," Minho mutters. He isn't quite fond of being carried like this. 

\--------

Seonghwa drives Minho to the emergency room and carries him inside. Immediately one of the staff gets a wheelchair, and Soenghwa places him on it. They take him to the nurse at the front, who evaluates and questions Minho. 

"On the scale from one to ten, how bad is the pain?"

Truthfully, the pain is around a five because Minho isn't applying any weight onto his injured ankle. But for the sake of getting out of here fast, he touches his ankle and overdramatically winces. "Ow, ow, ow! 10!" 

The higher the number, the sooner he is seen, right? No. Wrong. He was told to wait in the waiting room.

"Nice try," Seonghwa snickers. 

"Shut up," Minho snaps back. 

Soon Minho gets called in, and they do some X-rays on him. His ankle actually did turn out to be fractured but not too severely. They put on a blue cast on Minho's right ankle and give him crutches, which he has to use until further notice by his doctor. They shared the information about his visit with his doctor and told Minho to schedule an appointment with them.

"I think you should report this person that assaulted you and press charges," Seonghwa says as he puts on his seat belt. Minho shakes his head. He  _ does _ want to charge Daekhwa for assault and file a restraining order for himself and Jisung so that the rat doesn't get near them. Those things are only Minho's unachievable hopes. Daekhwa currently has the power to damage Jisung's idol reputation. The only thing Minho could do is follow Daekhwa's words. 

"It sucks that I can't dance, drive, and walk normally!" Minho groans.

"Don't worry about it, Minho, it will all pass," Seonghwa says and makes a right turn, "Want to know something good about being on crutches?"

Minho turns his head to the other. "What?"

"You can leave class a few minutes early! So you won't be late to your classes!"

" _ Yay _ ," Minho sarcastically replies. 

Seonghwa assists Minho to his apartment and helps him sit down on the couch. He then takes Minho's crutches and leans them against the side of Minho's couch. 

"Thank you for the help today," Minho says to Seonghwa with a smile.

"Aw, finally you are smiling," Seonghwa coos.

"My car is still in student parking. Can you somehow get it for me?"

"Isn't it a self-driving Tesla?"

"No." Minho laughs. "I have to be behind the wheel."

"Okay, I'll ask San to drive it here. He has a license but not yet a car," Seonghwa says. Minho thanks him and gives him the key.

\--------

Night shadowed over a while ago, yet Minho remains fully awake. He is lying on the couch with his forearm pressed over his closed eyes. He thinks about the cast at his right foot, and it upsets him that he couldn't do the things he liked temporarily. This is all because of Daekhwa; he is boundless. 

Someone knocks on the door, and Minho automatically lets out a grunt of irritation; who the hell would come here at his place in the middle of the night? Before Minho gets out of his couch, he checks the time on his phone - 1:06 AM - and rolls his eyes. It has to be Jisung coming here after his schedules. 

With his irritating crutches, Minho steps to the front door and opens it, only to find Chan there gaping at Minho in worry. His eyes fall onto Minho's right foot, and then he drags his gaze back at Minho's eyes. 

"What are you doing here?" Minho asks, "It's past midnight. You should get some sleep." 

" _ Minho, Minho, Minho _ ." Chan sighs (that same sigh of disappointment) and pushes past him. Minho closes the door and then follows after Chan, who places himself on the couch. Minho sits down as well and lays his crutches down. "I saw Seonghwa carrying you earlier today. What happened to your foot and your face?"

"I got into a fight," Minho replies, "Nothing too serious."

"This is serious. Look at what happened to you! Why aren't you learning to control your anger?"

"I guess you just came here to scold me. You don't even care about my pain," Minho states pettily. 

"You worry me a lot. You get yourself into so much trouble," Chan replies, "What was this fight even caused by?" 

Minho thinks about Chan's question for a brief moment. He wants to tell Chan about what is happening, so the other could somehow help, but the anxiety inside of Minho tells him not to. What if Daekhwa finds out and releases the pictures right away? 

Nah, he will not tell Chan. 

"We fought to test our strength," Minho lies. 

And the quick-witted Chan catches the lie. "You're lying. Want me to tell you what makes me think you are lying?" Minho stays silent, letting the older continue. "You would never, under any circumstances, get into fights randomly or foolishly. That's just not you, Minho. So please, tell me what really happened. I want to do whatever it takes to help you." 

"Chan-"

"No excuses!" Chan shouts. 

"I'm not in the mood to talk!" Minho shouts back, tears falling from his eyes. "I'm so stressed out about having to walk on fucking crutches for I don't know how long! I fucking hate this shit! I just want to throw these sticks out the balcony and probably even myself!" 

"Sorry, Minho," Chan says with a gentle tone and wraps his arms around Minho, "I'm sorry that you are going through so much pain. I've been so harsh on you and mean when you were under so much pressure. I didn't even think about how much pain you were dealing with. I know things are hard for you right now, but please bear with it. This injury isn't a permanent thing, and you will heal. Don't let yourself tumble into this agony." Chan sure has a way to loosen Minho up because now he is sobbing so hard. 

"You're not alone, Minho," Chan whispers. "You're not all alone. I'm here for you, and I will always be." Minho is always alone. 

\--------

Seonghwa drives Minho to uni, and they part ways once inside. Minho heads through the hallways until he nears his class. His blood runs cold when he finds Jisung leaning against the wall, and the younger turns his head in Minho's direction. 

Minho hopes that Jisung doesn't recognize him - he doesn't want to cause him to worry. Thank god Minho decided to wear a mask and to cover his face slightly. 

Well, fuck, the concerned expression that coats Jisung's face tells Minho that the other knows it is him. How can he not? Of course, Jisung would know Minho by his body, how he dresses, and Minho came here in this exact spot for his fucking class. 

"Minho, what happened?" Jisung asks once he is close to Minho. 

"Nothing," Minho quickly responds before turning around to get away. What luck does he even have with these crutches? 

He feels his soon to be ex-boyfriend's hand land on his shoulder, and Minho stops in his tracks. "Don't run from me." Jisung steps in front of Minho and forcefully pulls down Minho's hood, and pulls down his mask. Jisung's brow knits together at the sight of Minho's injured face. "It was Daekhwa, wasn't it?" 

"No," Minho replies. 

"Stop lying! No one else would hurt you so horribly like this."

"But it wasn't him, Jisung, please believe me," Minho pleads, "It was someone else, we were fighting to test our strength, and he won." 

"Okay," Jisung fumes, "Fine." He doesn't say anything else, nor does Minho. They both stand there in the middle of a hallway with students rushing past them. Some even looked at them curiously, likely wondering what was going on between the two. "Fine," Jisung repeats the same word before walking away. 

Minho watches Jisung's back until he disappears. With sadness, he chews on his bottom lip.

\--------

Minho sits at an empty table, without his lunch. He takes out his phone and only uses it to swipe here and there; he does this to make himself feel less awkward. For minutes he is like this on his phone until his soon to be ex-boyfriend sits across from him. 

"Hey," Jisung says. Minho lifts his head, looks at Jisung briefly before returning his gaze to his phone. "Minhooo, notice me," Jisung whines. Still no reply. "I know you're upset because you injured yourself, but please don't keep on a frown, okay?"

"Whatever." 

"Don't be sad. Things will impr-."

"How am I not supposed to be sad! I broke my right fucking ankle! I can't dance, all I have to do is watch the others. I am tired of this shit! First, I hurt my head and then my ankle. Even if things seem to get better, they end up downpouring on me. I don't have the strength to handle everything!" Minho barks. "Hmm, I wonder what I will break next? My neck? I hope so because I don't even find pleasure in life."

Jisung frowns at him. "What about me? Aren't I a pleasure in your life?" That hits Minho hard in the heart. Jisung  _ is _ a pleasure in Minho's life. He means so much to him, but Minho couldn't keep this relationship going. It isn't going smoothly because of a certain someone.

"I don't know, ba-" he was about to say 'baby' but quickly cuts himself off, "I don't know."

"Minho, I'll be your happy pill, I'll always try to bring a smile on your face," Jisung says and then makes a cute expression, expecting Minho to smile. Minho doesn't and keeps on his stern expression, which makes Jisung deflate. "Anyway." Jisung gets his backpack, opens it, and pulls out two chocolate milk and calcium gummies. "I got you these at the nearby convenience store. It will help with the hea-"

"I don't need them. You drink them," Minho says.

"But I bought them for you." Jisung sulks.

"I don't want them! Can you stop being so annoying!" Minho growls at Jisung. Immediately Jisung's face pales, and tears collect in his eyes. Minho ignores the pained Jisung, stands up from his spot, and heads away. He doesn't even look back to check on Jisung. What's the point of even comforting him when they are soon to be over? 

\--------

Jisung crashes onto his bed and stares up at the ceiling in anguish. His thoughts are all blue. He thinks deeply about Minho's injuries and the vast amounts of anger his boyfriend has within him. Jisung was deeply hurt when Minho exploded on him, but he tried to get himself to understand. Minho isn't in a great situation and is going through so much pain. Maybe Jisung's interference wasn't making Minho any happier. 

Jisung pulls out his phone to call Chan, the only person as of now who would listen to Jisung's sad words. He is finally on good terms with Chan and Changbin again; after all the activities together, they naturally returned to being friends. Jisung chose to forgive then, because why not? They all were all under the same cloud of stress while Felix was in the hospital. 

"Hello?"

"Chan Hyung, I needed to talk to you about Minho. Did he tell you anything yet?"

"Nope," Chan says and sighs, "Minho is keeping everything to himself. I can tell whatever he is going through is serious. I visited him late at night after our schedules, and he cried so much. He is under so much emotional distress."

Jisung's heart tugs wistfully. "I want to help him, but he doesn't seem like he wants any help from me and lashes out."

"The typical, stubborn Minho. Let's not push him too much," Chan concludes. 

"Yeah." 

They end the call, and Jisung starts picking at his jeans' fabric, returning to his earlier thoughts. As much as he doesn't want to push Minho for answers, he needs those answers. He doesn't wish Minho to suffer all on his own; Jisung wants Minho to feel better. Does he still go to therapy, or did he abandon that? 

The door opens and in comes Hyunjin with Jeongin behind him. The taller boy sets his dark eyes on Jisung, and Jeongin closes the door before wrapping his arms around Hyunjin's waist from behind - resting his chin onto Hyunjin's shoulder. Jeongin gives Jisung a knowing smile, sending Jisung the signal that they two are finally back together. Jisung mirrors the blissful smile. 

"Scaredy cat Hyunjin has something to say to you," Jeongin says with a calm tone. 

Hyunjin makes a shocked expression from the betrayal. "I'm not a scaredy-cat!"

"What is it that you want to tell me?" Jisung asks and scoots to sit at the edge of his bed. 

"I just wanted to apologize to you. I know what I did is-"

"It's fine, Hyunjin," Jisung says before Hyunjin could complete his sentence. Hyunjin doesn't look convinced enough, though, and Jisung had to send him a small smile and pat at the empty spot next to him. "Sit. You too, Jeongin." 

Jeongin pulls away from Hyunjin and walks over to sit at the edge of Hyunjin's bed. Hyunjin lets out a sigh and sits next to Jisung.

"You really forgive me?"

"How can I not forgive my wonderful best friend?" Jisung replies with a laugh, "I can't stay angry with you any longer because I just love you so much." 

"What a relief," Hyunjin huffs, "I was stressing over you not forgiving me." 

Jisung hugs Hyunjin tightly, and Jeongin joins in, hugging Jisung from behind - now Jisung is sandwiched between the couple; he likes it, though. He is delighted to see how much Jeongin changed for Hyunjin. 

\--------

"The cast is looking so nice on you," Daekhwa comments and sits across from Minho. 

Daekhwa texted Minho earlier, asking him to meet him at the café because he needed to tell him something important, so here Minho is.

Minho used to hate being near Daekhwa and just wanted to choke him or something like that, but now those feelings swapped to anxiety. Nowadays, he fears being around Daekhwa. 

"What do you even want from me now? I'm mean to Jisung. I'm trying to make him fall out of love with me. It hasn't even been a month yet," Minho says in a light tone. This is a tone Minho doesn't use; he now presents the vulnerable side of himself. He wants to cry; he couldn't believe he is Daekhwa's prey now. 

Daekhwa's eyes lit in anger, and he slapped his hand onto the table. "You recorded our conversation in the locker room, you stupid shit!" 

_ Oh shit. _

"H-How did you know?"

"I should tell you everything, shouldn't I? I asked the naive San for your number. Before you go running to that innocent thing and yell at him, let me tell you this; you are just as fucking naive, probably much more than San. When I texted you that file containing Jisung's pictures, and you downloaded it, it didn't only contain the pictures. It also contained hidden software. The software gives me full access to your phone. I am a genius, Minho, a fucking genius. And you, my friend, are a fucking idiot. I deleted the recording, by the way, and will let what you did slide.  _ However _ , if you take another step into attempting victory, I will send out the pictures." 

Minho chokes out a pained sob. "Should I just die? Then will you stop?"

"Mm. If you want to die, die in secret. No one should know." Daekhwa gives Minho a sinister smile before standing up and leaving. 

Minho folds his arms onto the table and rests his head over his arms. Problems just add on and on. Problems he couldn't control.

\--------

In the afternoon, Seonghwa takes Minho to the phone place, and there Minho asks to switch to a new phone and a new number once again. San gives him a weirded out look, and Minho informs him that he'll explain once they are out of here.

"I got a new phone and number because someone hacked into it," Minho tells the two once they are situated in Seonghwa's car. 

"That sucks. Why is so much happening to you? You are walking on so much bad luck," Seonghwa says, giving Minho a look of genuine remorse. 

"Bad luck owns a puppet-like me." Minho sighs and looks out the passenger window. 

When he returns to his apartment, he turns on his new phone and puts in everyone's numbers again. He sends them all the same text: 'Hi, this is Lee Minho. I'm using a new number again because my other had some problems. Please do not give anyone my number without asking me for permission.' 

And of course, within a thirty-minute time frame, he gets a text from his parents, Chan and Jisung; they all ask him what happened. The only people he replied to were his parents because if he doesn't, they'd call him or even come here to his apartment to get the answers they want. 

Later, after finishing his small dinner, he goes on his laptop and opens up his email account. Relief washes inside him when he finds the audio file safely there. He downloads it and plays the recording. Thank goodness the evidence remains. 

\--------

Wearing an ankle boot after two weeks of being on crutches wasn't so bad. Minho could walk a little normally but not yet drive. 

Thankfully that boot came finally off; after yesterday's appointment, his doctor said that his bone healed entirely and that he could walk and drive on it again. Taking good care of his ankle was worth the fast recovery. 

However, it doesn't change the fact that he is under Daekhwa's control. 

Minho is currently at the library, a place he never really goes to, but today he does because it's the only place he could hide from the others. No one can find him here, not even Jisung. Minho doesn't even share his location with the other anymore. 

Minho sits at the table by the wall with a book in hand. It's so far pretty interesting; he feels absorbed into it; maybe he should check it out. Will it distract him well enough? He turns to the next page, and right when he starts reading the first line; he spots someone sitting across from him. 

That someone is Seungmin. Minho should've expected this boy to situate himself in a library; he definitely is a hanging-out-in-the library type. 

"Never took you as the type to engage yourself with a book. I thought you were only a dancer," Seungmin chuckles.

"Surprise, I guess?" Minho responds with a small smile. 

Seungmin laughs again before setting a serious expression. "Anyway, I heard about what happened to you. Is everything okay?" 

"Yes, I'm totally fine now," Minho replies, "My ankle healed pretty well because I took good care of it. I will be more careful from now on."

"That's good to hear," Seungmin says and stands up, "I came here to check in with you real quick. I have to get going now. See you, Minho, and take care."

"See you," Minho replies and returns to his book.

\--------

Minho travels through the second floor until he stops at the area Jisung used to hang out. Minho came here on purpose because of the sheer curiousness he had inside himself - wondering if either Jisung and Daekhwa would be here. 

He turns his head to the large floor to ceiling windows, and yeah, it's both of them there, talking. Jisung looked so done with Daekhwa; he had a disgusted look on his face, appearing like he wanted to kill the silver-haired rat. However, when Jisung's eyes meet with Minho's, the expression crumbles and turns to a look of relief. Minho isn't going to help Jisung this time; he couldn't, even if he feels himself burning up on the inside.

Minho wants to walk away but couldn't bring himself to do so because now Daekhwa's attention is on him. 

"Hey Minho, perfect timing, we were just talking about you."

"That's nice to hear. I'll go now if you don't need me." Minho lands his eyes on Jisung again, who didn't look so happy with his response. 

" _ Oh no _ , can you spare a minute? We need you right now. Jisung has to ask you an important question." 

Minho sighs and crosses his arms over his chest. "Okay, spill." 

"Minho, did I do something wrong? These past few days, you avoided me a lot and didn't seem so happy to be around me. Daekhwa said you are mad at me, but I didn't want to believe his words. Of course, I wouldn't believe his words without asking you. So is it true?" 

Minho stares at Jisung with sorrow, and his heart starts tearing when he sees the tears twinkling in Jisung's eyes. He wants to run over to him, hug him, kiss him endlessly and make him feel all better, but he couldn't. 

Minho turns his attention to Daekhwa again, who looks at him with impatience. The silver-haired rat mouths the word 'photos' then smiles evilly.

Minho looks at Jisung. "Daekhwa is right. I'm  _ very _ mad at you."

"Daekhwa made you say that! I'm not stupid!" Jisung steps to Minho. "You wouldn't be mad at me!" 

"What makes you think that? You irritate me so much! That's why I have been avoiding you!" Minho snaps back, "You just are so clingy." 

Daekhwa gives him a satisfied grin before turning to Jisung. "See, I told you. He isn't good enough for you."

"Minho, this is unbelievable. Tell me the real reason why you are acting this way."

Minho finally figures out what to say; it will be a big blow for Jisung and believable. "Jisung, can you please stop pestering me? Why don't you focus on your job? Obviously, you care about your career more than you care about me!"

" _ Oh _ , so this is what it is about, huh? I was trying to push in some time for you!" Jisung rolls his eyes. Minho begins stepping away, trying to show that he doesn't care. Jisung is swift to rush after him and latch his hand onto Minho's arm and turns him around aggressively. "Why? Minho, is this injury getting into your head?" 

"I suppose so," Minho says nonchalantly and watches how Jisung's face scrunches up in anger.

"You're acting like a prick! It's hur-" Minho yanks his arm away and steps away fast. Leaving Jisung to stand there brokenly.

\--------

Minho is at his couch, sitting as still as a sculpture because Jisung is here with him, sitting closely next to him. The younger frantically wanted to come here and hang out with him, and Minho couldn't decline. 

"Minho, you're birthday is-"

"I don't give a shit!" Minho says and scowls, "Don't talk about it to me! Nor celebrate it!"

"I-I see." Jisung pulls a frown. "I thought deeply about what you said that day. I think I should quit the group. You really do feel lonely without me by your side often. I can see it in your face. I know dating is risky, so I'll quit to date you freely and spend a lot of time with you. I don't want you to be hurt anymore. I want to be by your side and protect you from those who dare to hurt you. I know those injuries you had weren't from a playful fight. They are from Daekhwa." 

Minho's bottom lip wobbles. Little does Jisung know. He cups the younger's face and kisses his face all over. Then he takes Jisung's lips into his own and instantly feels his heart act up by beating quickly. He misses Jisung's lips so much. 

"Wow, it's been so many days since you kissed me," Jisung mutters when they pull away. He wraps his arms around Minho's waist and pulls him in for another kiss; this time, it was of desperation. 

"Don't quit the group over me, Jisung; you'll regret it," Minho breathes. "Stay there. I'll deal with everything. I will find a way to spend some time with you. Sorry for being so selfish. I can get carried away at times." Little does Jisung know that he is planning on breaking up with him soon. Minho has very little time left and needs to act quickly. He probably would need more time because Jisung still loves him the same, even after being mean. It sucks that Daekhwa wouldn't likely give him more time. Monsters have no mercy. 

Maybe he should break not only Jisung's heart but also his trust. 

"I love you so much, Minho," Jisung says cutely and grins. 

"Mm," Minho replies softly. Jisung isn't satisfied with that answer. 

"Minho. I love you." He wants the words out of Minho's mouth, but Minho couldn't let out those words. He doesn't want to warm up Jisung's heart; he wants his heart to turn cold; he wants Jisung to turn away from him and stop feeling anything for him. 

"Minho, why aren't you saying anything back?" Jisung whines and purses his lips. Minho only smiles at him, a painfully fake smile, and starts pressing kisses against Jisung's neck - doing whatever it takes to avoid answering. "Do you not love me?" 

Minho seals Jisung's mouth with his lips, kissing him so passionately. Jisung gives in again, kissing him back deeper. When they pull away, however, Jisung doesn't stop with his questionings. "Minho, you are avoiding those words, aren't you? Did you fall out of love with me?" 

Minho lifts Jisung's shirt, and the younger immediately grabs his hand, stopping him. He lets go of Jisung's shirt, letting it fall back.

"First you say I love you too, and then we proceed," Jisung demands, desperately wanting to hear the words. 

"Um, actually, I changed my mind. I need to study for my midterms. Let me go shower real quick." Minho stands up, and so does Jisung. 

"Do you hate me?" Jisung asks. 

"Wait; what?" Minho replies, bewildered.

"I feel like you don't love me as much anymore." 

"I do."

"Then-" 

"Fine," Minho groans, " _ I love you too, Jisung _ . Happy now? Now I'll go take a shower."

"I am not very at all happy. You forced those words out."

"At least I said them." 

"You don't care about-"

Minho walks away from the younger quickly and heads straight inside the bathroom. He lets out a breath of relief once he closes the door and immediately strips and gets inside the shower.

Now he has some peace to himself and uses this time to reflect. Reflect on how much of an asshole he was to Jisung. Warm tears slip from his eyes, and then sobs rip from him. He covers his mouth to stifle the sounds so that Jisung doesn't hear. He just wanted to give up, tell everyone what was happening, but it instantly reminds him of what Daekhwa would do. Minho felt like he caused himself to fall into a trap. 

He feels a warm body press against his back, and arms circle around his waist. It didn't startle him because he knew it was Jisung. He turns his body and sees how concerned Jisung looks. 

"You're hurting," he says.

_ Yes. I'm hurting so much; you don't even know how much I am going through. _

"No, I'm okay," Minho replies, trying his best to keep his voice at his usual normal tone. Still, it came out frail enough to make pity shadow Jisung's eyes. 

"You are hiding a lot from me," Jisung states. 

Minho shakes his head. "Just stressed over midterms, nothing else." 

Jisung purses his lips in dissatisfaction and then smiles at him. "Should we release the stress?" he slides his hands down Minho's back and pauses at his butt. Minho nods, and the red-haired boy immediately starts kissing Minho. He slides his arms around Minho's waist and pulls his body against his. 

In the bathroom was nothing else but sounds of kissing and the water slapping down harshly. This should be a moment that is breath-taking and heartwarming, but Minho feels none of those. All he feels is apprehension. 

After getting dressed, they both sit next to each other in the bed in silence. Jisung fiddles with his fingers likely attached in his thoughts. Minho, meanwhile, is silently coming up with unpleasant plans. He has very little time left and needs to take action. 

"Hey, Jisung, since I have a new phone, can I share locations with you? Sorry for not asking you earlier. I just remembered about it. I need to know where my boyfriend is at all times." 

Jisung gives him a cheerful grin as he nods. 

\--------

Today is Minho's birthday - the brunette doesn't want it celebrated, but that isn't going to stop Jisung. Yesterday he went to a jewelry store and took some time in searching for a bracelet to give his boyfriend as a gift. He knows it isn't as good as the ring, but he hopes his boyfriend would love it. 

He couldn't wait until the afternoon; Jisung plans on coming to Minho's place with a small birthday cake and the present. Minho likely wouldn't want a big celebration because of how upset he had been for several days, so Jisung will come by himself and surprise him. He hopes it makes Minho very happy.

Jisung heads to his econ class, climbs up the steps, and slides in next to Hyunjin. The taller boy instantly turns his head to him. 

"Did you see Minho this morning?" Hyunjin asks. There is something weird in his eyes, an emotion Jisung couldn't decipher. Is he okay?

"No, I didn't see him yet. Why?"

"Nothing, just curious." Hyunjin sighs and turns his head forward.  _ Weird _ . 

\--------

Jisung gleefully heads to Minho's apartment with a bag in hand. He wanted to enter the code and burst inside, but he doesn't want to bother Minho like that, so he knocks on the door and waits for the other to answer. 

Minho doesn't open the door. Jisung thinks the other probably didn't hear the knock, so he tries again, still, no answer. He carefully places the bag down and checks Minho's location. Minho is coming to this building! Jisung giggles softly to himself picks up the bag, unlocks Minho's door, and heads inside. 

He hides behind Minho's couch and waits. 

Eventually, the door opens, and Jisung  _ would _ jump from his hiding space, but chooses not to because he hears someone else laughing with Minho. He does take a little peek, though, and finds Minho with Seonghwa. Seonghwa has his arm wrapped around Minho, Jisung's heart begins cracking a little.

No, no, he is overthinking. Maybe Seonghwa is comforting Minho.

"I love your eyebrows," Minho states and laughs. A genuine laugh. 

"That was random," Seonghwa replies, "Anyway, since it is your birthday, what do you want to do tonight?" Jisung heart cracks further. 

"Hmm, we've been dating for a few days now. Do you think we are ready for it?" Minho asks. 

Tears spill out of Jisung's eyes when his heart cracks and shatters, falling out of its original place to the floor. Several pieces that neither Jisung nor even Minho could collect, connect, and place back to where it belongs. It's true, Minho fell out of love with him long ago. No wonder Minho wouldn't say 'I love you' to Jisung back. Minho doesn't love him. He loves Seonghwa - a boy who has such perfect features on his face and is so polite and patient. Something Jisung isn't.

Disgust perched in Jisung's stomach when he heard Minho let out a moan. "Mm, Seonghwa, your hand is so cold." 

"Oh yeah?" Seonghwa replies, smugness in his tone. Jisung shuts his eyes and covers his mouth when he hears another moaning sound from Minho's a louder one this time.

"Seonghwa, ah, so good. Loving your cold fingers." 

Jisung pops up from his spot, tears blinding his eyes. He blinks, setting them free, and notices the shocked expression settle on Minho's face. 

Seonghwa quickly removes his hand that originally was up Minho's shirt and hid behind the brunette, looking equally as shocked as him. 

"What are you doing here?" Minho asks. 

"I came here to celebrate your birthday and make you happy, but I guess you don't-" Jisung sobs and moves his eyes to Seonghwa. "You have someone else to make you happy. It was true...you did fall out of love with me." 

"Jisung..." was the only thing Minho mutters; he couldn't find anything else to fucking say as he was caught red-handed.

"Was I not good enough?" Jisung asks, that question alone causing water to flow out of Minho's shimmering eyes. The brunette shakes his head quickly, and a sob comes out of him. "Forgot it. Why should I even talk to a jerk like you? Minho, I had my full fucking trust in you, and look, you broke it! We're over! Don't you dare come back to me! Go ahead and fuck your new boyfriend!"

Minho collapses onto his knees and cries hard. He doesn't beg for Jisung's forgiveness nor asks for another chance. 

Jisung had enough of him, and he gives Minho one last look before exiting the apartment quickly. 

When he gets back to his dorm, he goes to Hyunjin and explains everything that happened. After that, he cries hard against Hyunjin's chest, and the taller boy frantically rubs Jisung's back, trying his best to get Jisung's to calm down. There was no way for Jisung to calm down when he experienced something so painful to his heart. The person he loved with all his heart cheated on him. Jisung wished he took all the hints earlier - the lack of love in Minho's eyes, the way he tried to avoid him, the way he wouldn't say 'I love you too' when Jisung asked. 

What sucks is that Jisung still has some love for Minho, even if the other broke his trust. 

"I-It's hurts so much," Jisung whimpers loudly. 

"Shh, shh, it's okay," Hyunjin softly mutters to him, "Minho is such an ass. He proved how trashy he was so many times, but I won't blame you."

Jisung pulls away, a string of his snot connected from his nose to Hyunjin's black shirt. "I'm sorry I'm such a mess." 

"Don't be sorry, Sungie, let's get something warm to drink at the café."

Jisung nods; maybe some warmth from a drink can ease his aching heart. 

\--------

It is a Saturday, a free day. A free day is what Jisung needed. All he did for a few hours was watch a few episodes of a newly released drama; the humorous scenes did a great job of lifting his mood and brought a laugh out of him. 

Deciding to take a small break, Jisung closes his laptop and places it aside. Instantly, Minho comes crawling in his mind, and Jisung lets out a frustrated sigh. He doesn't even want to think about the brunette. He grabs his laptop and opens it again to continue with the same drama.

The video starts, but Minho doesn't go away. Again, Jisung sighs and then lifts his left hand to look at the ring still at his ring finger. Should he take it off? They are over anyway. But his love for Minho lingers in his heart, even if the other cheated on him with Seonghwa. 

What does Minho see differently in Seonghwa? Jisung purses his lips at that thought. 

"Fuck!" Hyunjin, all of a sudden, screams, scaring Jisung out of his thoughts and causing him to pause the video quickly. He gets out of bed and rushes to Hyunjin. 

"Hyunjin! Is everything alright?" Hyunjin shakes his head, tears welling up in his eyes. 

"Jisung...Minho did you dirty. He sent out picture proof of you two dating out into the public, and JYP still has to make a statement." Jisung falls onto his butt in shock, not believing any of those words until Hyunjin nears his phone to Jisung's face. He grabs Hyunjin phone and starts scrolling through the news article about himself. 

Within the article is a statement regarding the pictures presented - lewd censored pictures of Minho and Jisung together. 

He places the phone down, pulls his knees to his chest, and cries. His days are getting worse, and it's all because of a bitter Minho who didn't like how Jisung's career absorbed his availability. 

"Jisung, we need to get to Chan quickly and explain," Hyunjin says eagerly and grabs Jisung's arm, trying to get him to stand.

"Do you think he'd want to see my face?" Jisung cries out, "I fucking ruined our group!"

Jisung's phone starts ringing. He stands up, finds it on his bed, and feels sudden coldness coat his skin when he sees Chan's name on the screen. 

"Chan-"

"Come to my place," Chan says with sternness, showing his anger. 

"O-Okay, I'll be there." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry if this chapter seems rushed, I rushed through the writing and editing xD; I hope you liked it though! - even though it was a mess and sad/irritating :(


	34. Goodbye to the love

“Seonghwa!” Minho shouts and catches up to the said boy; Seonghwa stops walking immediately and turns to Minho with a happy look on his face. “After your classes, come to my place. I need to tell you something very important. I can’t hold in anything any longer.” 

Worry coats Seonghwa’s face, and after some thinking, he nods. “Okay, I’ll be there.”

At Minho’s apartment, the two are sitting on the couch, listening to the recording. Once it finishes, Seonghwa stares at Minho with anger burning in his eyes. “This is what actually happened in that locker room? It wasn’t a damn play fight? Daekhwa was fucking threatening you? How come you didn’t say anything earlier! Why did you-”

“I was overwhelmed!” Minho harshly cuts him off, “At that moment, nothing was in my mind besides protecting Jisung from any harm.”

“Why are you letting that shit control you? You are so much better than this! What the fuck happened to you recently? You were strong and always acted boldly. Now you are fucking submitting yourself to a dense person all because you care about protecting Jisung than you care about your well being! Why did you let that meager bastard control you?”

“Daekhwa isn’t meager,” Minho grumbles, “He is horrible.”

“You should’ve told Jisung or his groupmates about this damn recording! Their careers are literally on the line because of Daekhwa! They could do something about it, unlike you who decides to keep this to himself. Don’t let this bitch win over. He is nothing but a pathetic person that has nothing better to do in life besides hurt others.”

“Seonghwa, it’s not that simple! If Daekhwa finds out, it’s all over!” 

“Daekhwa is so fucking thirsty for Jisung, calling you the whore when he is the one obviously acting as a food-deprived beast. I hate that bitch!” 

“I agree.” Minho leans back against the back cushion, Seonghwa mimics the action and looks straight ahead. “At this point, there is nothing much for me to do besides following that trash rats order.” 

“He wants you to break up with Jisung, and if you achieve that, he won’t send any of the pictures…” Seonghwa summarizes and turns his head to Minho, “I don’t like the idea of this.”

“Neither do I, but I have been trying to break Jisung’s heart. I tried to be mean to him and pretend to not love him anymore, but he doesn’t seem to take any of that seriously. He is such a kind-hearted person and always tries to understand situations. He knew I wasn’t in such a good state of mind and brushed away my actions.” 

“I feel so bad for that cute boy. He is getting harmed by a stupid boy.” Seonghwa sighs over dramatically. 

“When are you going to stop calling him ‘cute-boy’?” Minho asks with a small bit of jealousy at the tip of his tongue. 

“Never,” Seonghwa smirks at Minho playfully. “Anyway, what are you planning?” 

“Recently, I thought of not only breaking his hurt but also break his trust. Trust is hard to repair. I think the best way to break his trust is by pretending to cheat on him,” Minho states, and Seonghwa slaps Minho’s thigh so hard.

“Idiot! You shouldn’t do that to Jisung!” Seonghwa scolds, “Let me ask you this: is it Jisung you care about, or is it his career? Because all I can see from you is that you are doing this for the sake of his career. You are not even batting an eye for his feelings. I’m sure Jisung would rather have his career plummet than to lose you. You are an important aspect of his heart. If breaking his heart and trust is something you want to do to save him from losing his career because of Daekhwa, it truly shows that you care about his career more. This is what I am not liking about your actions. You aren’t acting from your heart.”

“Seonghwa-”

Seonghwa cuts Minho off again, continuing to speak, “Lee, Minho. Sometimes I just can’t understand you. There are many approaches, but you don’t think about those approaches and rather choose the fastest option and the stupidest option.”

“If you know so much, then tell me an option,” Minho scoffs and turns his face away from the other from irritability.

“All right. Instead of pretending to cheat on Jisung, just go to the fucking cops and play them this recording. Hell even go to JYP. This would be even better! They can do something about it!” 

“Jisung would get in trouble! He isn’t even supposed to date me! We are keeping this a secret from the public! If Daekhwa finds out about this, then Jisung’s done! His entire group is done!” 

Seonghwa puffs out his cheeks, expressing his frustration, then replies, “Is pretending to cheat on him is your only choice?”

Minho nods. “And I want you to be my pretend boyfriend.”

“This is why you wanted to talk to me in the first place, isn’t it?!” Seonghwa shrieks.

“ _ Maybe _ .” Minho shrugs. 

Seonghwa taps his chin in thought before hesitantly nodding. “Okay, honey, let's get started.”

“Ew.” Minho grimaces, even though acting like a couple, is basically a part of this plan. “Anyway, I only have two days to break up with Jisung. I asked Jisung to share his location with me for a purpose, and the purpose is for me to follow him so we can create a scene in front of him. I break his heart, and Daekhwa wins.”

“That jealous fuck, Seonghwa grumbles, “How about I murder him, and we win?”

“And go to prison? No.”

Seonghwa purses his lips. “Fine, let’s practice, honey.” 

\--------

In the morning, Seonghwa and Minho travel around while holding each other’s hands. Minho feels completely awkward doing this with Seonghwa - but he has to fulfill his quest. 

“Min- oh my god.” They both turn around at Hyunjin’s voice, and Minho immediately lets go of Seonghwa’s cold hand. 

“Hey,” Minho greets, a tiny fragment of awkwardness in his voice. 

Hyunjin eyes him suspiciously, his expression hard like a stone as he tries to read Minho through his sharp gaze. “Why were you two holding hands?” Minho couldn’t find an immediate answer to this. 

“My hand was so cold, and Minho offered to hold it to warm it up for me,” Seonghwa rapidly claims.

“Your hand is so cold, it made my hand cold,” Minho says in mock anger and rolls his eyes. 

“Okay then,” Hyunjin replies, the suspicion not disappearing, “Happy birthday, Minho. I don’t get why you don’t want it celebrated, but I won’t push. See you, I hope you have a great day. You should.” Then Hyunjin walks away, and Minho lets out a breath of relief. An angry Hyunjin is a frightening Hyunjin, and Minho doesn’t want the younger boy to create a scene in front of all of these students. 

\--------

Minho and Seonghwa watch as Jisung heads inside the apartment building with a pastel blue bag. Minho supposes it’s his birthday present and believes that Jisung is going up to his apartment to surprise him with the gift. Too bad Minho is going to spoil his own birthday and ruin Jisung’s heart. 

“Are you ready for this?” Seonghwa asks.

Minho takes in a deep breath, trying to calm down his already aching heart. He isn’t quite fond of this plan and not fond of deeply wounding Jisung by pretending to cheat on him - but again, Minho has to do this. There is only one day left. 

“Yes,” Minho answers. 

“I still feel so bad for Jisung,” Seonghwa complains. 

“It’ll be over soon.” Minho smiles painfully. “It’s best for Jisung.” 

Seonghwa nods even though he wasn’t fond of this at all. 

The two head inside the building and reach Minho’s floor. He eyes his door, noticing Jisung wasn’t there; he probably went inside to surprise him. Too bad Jisung is also going to be met with a surprise too - a painful surprise. 

Minho types in the password, but because of his nervousness and shaking hands, it turns out incorrect. He continues with mistyping it three times, and Seonghwa couldn’t compose himself and starts laughing at him. 

Minho finally manages to open the door, but before they step inside, Seonghwa quickly wraps an arm around Minho and bursts out laughing again. Minho couldn’t contain himself either and laughs along.

He looks straight ahead and spots Jisung’s red hair rushing back down behind the couch -  _ someone _ took a little peek real quick. 

Minho didn’t know what to say but decided to say a random compliment. “I love your eyebrows.” Seonghwa’s brows actually are so beautiful and perfect. 

“That was so random,” Seonghwa replies with a roll of his eyes, “Anyway, since it is your birthday, what do you want to do tonight?” 

“Hmm, we’ve been dating for a few days now. Do you think we are ready for it?” Minho says and swallows nervously at his own words.

Seonghwa purses his lips in apprehension but starts kissing Minho on the neck and slides his hand up Minho’s shirt. “Mm, Seonghwa, your hand is so cold,” Minho fake moans. 

“Oh yeah?” Seonghwa replies fakely, and his icy fingers brush against Minho’s sensitive bud. The coldness brought with the touch makes Minho let out a real moan this time. 

“Seonghwa, ah, so good. Loving your cold fingers,” Minho blurts. 

Now, this is what causes Jisung to stand up from his hiding spot. The tears Minho catches in the youngers eyes makes his heart stop; for the sake of the acting, Minho pulls on a shocked expression although he feels nothing but pain. 

"What are you doing here?" Minho manages to ask. 

"I came here to celebrate your birthday and make you happy, but I guess you don't-" Jisung couldn’t finish his sentence as a sob forced out of him instead. He moves his teary eyes to Seonghwa. "You have someone else to make you happy. It was true...you did fall out of love with me." 

This isn’t true; falling out of love with Jisung is something that would never happen. Minho loves him so fucking much. 

“Jisung…” Minho softly starts but doesn’t say anything else. What can he even say? This is what Minho wants - even though he loves him, breaking up is a must. 

“Was I not good enough?” Jisung questions, the pain in his voice makes Minho’s face burn, and tears spill out. Jisung is good enough; he is perfect. Minho couldn’t do anything else but shake his head to deny Jisung’s words. “Forgot it. Why should I even talk to a jerk like you? Minho, I had my full fucking trust in you, and look, you broke it! We’re over! Don’t you dare come back to me! Go ahead and fuck your new boyfriend!” 

At those words, Minho falls onto his knees. At those words, tears pour out of his eyes, and sobs run out of him vigorously. 

Jisung looks at Minho one last time before exiting the apartment quickly.

Seonghwa lowers himself next to Minho and starts rubbing his back. 

“Please don't cry.”

“I regret it, Seonghwa,” Minho cries, “I was hurt the moment I saw the pain in his eyes. I guess this is the best for him. I don’t want Daekhwa doing any bad things to him. We’re free!”

\--------

Daekhwa.

Is.

A.

Traitor.

He didn’t keep his words. He lied. 

Minho went up to him when he found him in the morning and told him that he and Jisung broke up, but guess what? Daekhwa said that he didn’t care and would release the pictures anyway because it would be fun, and Minho would obviously get the blame and get hate.

Fun? Ruining lives is fun? 

He is psycho. 

This wasn’t the only thing that ruined Minho’s day. Not too long ago, Chan called Minho and yelled at him for five good minutes - for cheating on Jisung and for ruining his image. 

Currently, Minho is in his car, driving to Chan’s place. He parks his car in the nearest empty lot and rushes inside the building. He frantically knocks at the door, and when Changbin opens it, his eyes explode into wild flames showing how pissed off he is. 

“I-I can explain- please let me in,” Minho begs in fear; he needs to get the truth out. 

“No,” Changbin firmly concludes.

“Let him in. I have more to say to that prick,” Chan states in annoyance. Changbin moves away from the door, letting Minho slip inside. “Sit,” Chan coldly demands. Minho sits down and plays with his fingers in apprehension. 

“I just don’t understand you! Why did you seek revenge towards Jisung? Just because he focuses on his job-”

“I didn’t send out the pictures, Chan. Do you think I would do something horrible like that to Jisung?” Minho cries. 

“Oh, those photos sure aren’t from you,” Chan sarcastically remarks. 

“I-I have proof,” Minho says and takes out his phone. He quickly unlocks it, finds the voice recording he downloaded onto his phone, and plays it. 

The recording finishes. Redness is all over Chan’s face from the extreme feelings of wrath - likely towards Minho because he takes part in the issue. Minho shouldn’t have let Daekhwa control him - Seonghwa was right about this. 

“So you fucking acted like this to Jisung all over what Daekhwa said? You are so low. Why didn’t you send us the recording fucking immediately? We could’ve handled this before this scandal! Now we have so much cleaning up to do! How are we supposed to cover this up easily? We can’t just say that these pictures are fake!” 

“I’m sorry I didn’t know what to do.” Minho covers his face with his hands and cries into them.

“Oh, Minho…” Chan pulls Minho into a hug, only to cause Minho to cry harder. 

“I know how to solve this,” Changbin finally speaks. 

“Alright, explain,” Chan says. 

“Minho can take the blame. He can say that he is a huge fan of Jisung and decided to make silly photo edits of him and Jisung together. Jisung’s head was cropped off and edited perfectly onto a random person’s body. Minho, do you think you are a good editor?” 

“No,” Minho whimpers into his hand. He feels Chan’s finger slip up into his hair, and he begins to comb the strands. 

“Well, now you are. Lee Minho is an editor and a fan artist that just wanted to picture himself with his bias of the group. He really loves Han Jisung.”

Chan laughs, and Minho lifts his head and wipes away his tears, feeling a teensy bit better now because of the smart and hopefully successful plan. 

“I’ll call Jisung to come over, and we’ll clear this up with him,” Chan states.

“What if he goes away because of me?” Minho asks. 

“He wouldn’t, and if he does.” Changbin sits next to Minho and places a hand on his shoulder. “I’ll drag him here.” 

\--------

Jisung had to wear a bucket hat and a mask to disguise himself from the public - he doesn’t feel like he can face anyone anymore after this scandal. He couldn’t stop crying because he is so worried about what would happen once he reached Chan and Changbin’s apartment. They’d probably yell at him for ruining the group early. 

“Jisung.” Hyunjin grabs Jisung’s hand and gives it a gentle squeeze. “I’m here with you. I will not let you get hurt."

They exit the bus and walk until they reach the apartment building. When they arrived at the floor Chan and Changbin’s apartment is located at, Jisung breathing starts getting out of his control. Hyunjin wraps an arm around him to keep him upright. 

“I can’t do this,” Jisung sobs, “I’m scared.” 

“Don’t worry, let’s hold hands, yeah? Will that make you feel better?” Jisung nods at Hyunjin’s suggestion, and the older boy holds onto Jisung’s shaking hand. 

They step to the dreadful door, and Hyunjin knocks on it. Changbin is the one to open the door and lets the two of them step inside. Jisung’s eyes fall upon Minho, who is seated on the couch next to Chan. His heart rate picks up in nervousness. He doesn’t want to be in the same room with Minho.

He turns for the door, only to find Changbin standing in front of it; Jisung guesses he couldn’t leave and turns back forward. He pulls down his mask and asks, “What is he doing here?” 

“He came here to explain, the majority of what happened isn’t even his fault,” Chan states, “It’s Daekhwa’s.” 

Chan whispers something into Minho’s ear, and the brunette takes out his phone, turns up the volume, and plays the recording. Jisung’s eyes grow wide from the truth, and when the recording ends, he peers at Minho with infuriation. 

“You lied! What the fuck! You were being mean to me because of Daekhwa! I’m so angry with you! Why did you have to follow his stupid orders?!”

“Because he was going to ruin your career!” 

“He ruined it anyway!” Jisung screams back, “You should’ve said something instead of staying silent about it!” 

Minho lowers his head in guilt. 

“Don’t fight each other, please,” Changbin pleads, “I don’t like seeing you two at each other’s throats.”

He acts impulsively! We could’ve done something about this earlier!” Jisung continues to shout, and Hyunjin squeezes his hand, making him calm down right away. 

“Jisung, what happened, happened, happened, there is no point of getting angry with it, okay?” Chan assures, “Plus, Changbin came up with a good plan.”

“What’s the plan?” Jisung questions. 

Changbin explains the plan, and Jisung didn’t like it because Minho is going to take the blame for the chaos. It will hurt him, but Jisung doesn’t say anything about it, removes his hand from Hyunjin, and goes to sit next to Minho. 

“You hurt me so much. You acted mean to me and cheated on me just to get me to break up with you. How insensi-” he stops speaking when he hears Minho begin to hiccup. Jisung sighs out of pain and starts tearing up as well. “I’m sorry, Minho.” 

“I-I didn’t really cheat on you. It was an act. You can ask Seonghwa yourself.” Jisung nods at Minho’s explanation. “I acted impulsively because I didn’t want Daekhwa to do any harm to you.” 

Jisung kisses Minho’s cheek and then rests his head on the brunette’s shoulder. “Next time, when something bad is happening, don’t stay silent about it, please tell me, okay?”

Minho hums a reply. 

“Alright, let’s get this over with. Minho, do you have a Twitter account?” Chan asks.

“Yeah.”

“Time to create your statement, make it very convincing.” 

“I can write it up for him,” Changbin offers. 

Chan nods as a response and leaves the couch. A minute later, he returns to his spot with his laptop, opens up Twitter, and Minho logs into his account. He changes his account user because he wants to keep his identity hidden and places the laptop onto the coffee table for Changbin to do the rest of the work. 

Changbin - after ten minutes - finishes typing up the statement and gives the laptop to Chan for him to read over it. 

“Okay, so this situation is tackled, but what are we going to do about Daekhwa? What if he acts up again? Does he have any more pictures?” Hyunjin asks.

“Yeah, he does. He only released a few but has so many more saved.” Minho sighs. 

“My brother and his team are good with tech. Maybe he can do something about it. I’ll call him now.” 

Jisung takes out his phone and calls his brother, who immediately picks up. “Jisung! How are you doing? I saw what happened on the internet, that boyfriend of yours is such a-”

“No, it’s not him. Daekhwa got those pictures from Minho’s old phone a while ago. He is that person who hacked into his phone. Is there anything you can do about it?”

“We’re already done. I'm always quick to protect you,” Jihoon states, and Jisung could feel the smile in his brother’s voice, “My team found his IP address based on the account he used to leak the pictures. They got into his phone, deleted all of the pictures, got through all of his other devices, and did the same thing. He had so much saved on his crappy laptop.”

Tears of joy leak out of Jisung’s eyes. “Hyung! You’re the best!” 

“Take care, Jisung, don’t get yourself into any more trouble.”

“Alright, Hyung, bye,” Jisung replies cheerfully and hangs up. “Done!” He says to them.

“Your brother is literally the best,” Hyunjin comments and stands up. He turns to everyone and gives them a proud smile. “Did you guys know that Jisung’s brother is the CEO of a tech company at the age of twenty-five?-”

“He is twenty-six now.” Jisung laughs.

“A genius brother, how nice,” Changbin comments with a laugh.

Jisung notices Minho get up from his spot on the couch, and silently he heads for the door.

“Minho, you’re leaving?” Chan asks, causing the brunette to halt. 

“Things are settled. I’ll get going,” Minho responds and exits the apartment. Jisung furrows his eyebrows in worry; there was this unhappy energy coming off from the other. He decides to follow after the other to ask what is wrong. 

“Minho!” Jisung calls out for Minho and catches up to him. Minho stops walking and spins to face Jisung. “Are you okay?”

“Yes,” Minho responds.

Jisung sighs. “Let’s do a better job at keeping our relationship a secret between us. I know you don’t want to ruin my career, but in order to protect ourselves from the public, we shouldn’t tell anyone besides those we trust.” Jisung looks around for people before returning his eyes to Minho. “And as for our couple photos, we can take them on those instant cameras. No one can hack into those, I think.” 

“Jisung…we cant,” Minho mutters and lands his eyes on the floor. “Look what happened to you because of us.”

“But that was Daekhwa’s fault.” Jisung frowns, having a bad feeling about their relationship. It is already going downhill, but he doesn’t want it to fall apart. Things could be fixed.

“Jisung, this isn’t about him. This is about us. I think we shouldn’t break your company's rules, it can affect you. This relationship of ours isn’t doing you any good; it’s only bringing in so much unwanted attention.”

“Minho, it is doing me good! There is no way I could be happy without you!” 

Jisung’s eyes fill with water, and his heart breaks when he watches Minho take off the ring and bracelet. Minho grabs Jisung’s hand and places the two items onto his palm. 

“Thank-”

“No!” Jisung shouts, grabs Minho’s hand and slips on the ring finger, and puts on his bracelet, “These belong on you!” 

Minho tries to take them off again, but Jisung quickly spins the other to the wall. “You’re ruining me! Why do you always stomp on your happiness just to protect me? I don’t want that! I just want us to be happy. I know you care about my career, but you matter to me more. You come before everything. I would quit the group just to be with you peacefully.” 

“No, don’t even talk to me about quitting. You’re saying those words selfishly. Think about Changbin and Chan. Think about your hard work! Quitting won’t solve anything, Jisung. It’s only going to make me feel so guilty.” Minho shifts his gloom-coated eyes away from Jisung. 

“Is this what you really want?” Jisung asks what he didn’t want to ask but had to ask. 

Minho nods and bites onto his bottom lip. “It’s what is best for us.”

“Look me in the eye and tell me that,” Jisung demands and presses his hands against’s Minho’s blotchy cheeks. 

Minho lays his eyes onto his and lets out a breath that sends chills all over Jisung’s body. “I want to break-” Minho closes his eyes. “I want to break up with you. You have your career to focus on, and I do not want to infer in any way and potentially ruin your reputation and have you get in trouble.” 

Minho pulls Jisung’s hands away from his face and then takes off his ring and bracelet again and sets them onto Jisung’s palm. This time Jisung doesn’t bother with shouting and saying that they have to be together. He silently accepts their fate no matter how much pain it is bringing him. 

“Thank you, Jisung, being with you was amazing, thank you for everything.”

Jisung hiccups.  _ If being with me was amazing, then why can’t we continue? _ He wanted to say this just to have Minho realize and stay, but instead chooses to say, “Can we share one last kiss?” because he wants to feel the other’s lips against his, remember the warmth it brings him, and remember how good and loved it made him feel. 

Minho accepts with a hesitant nod, and Jisung is the one to initiate the kiss. Minho’s hands settle on Jisung’s waist, and he pulls Jisung’s body against his kissing him so intensely and passionately. 

Minho is the one to quickly end it. The quick warmth Jisung felt was also quick to run away fast and make him feel so cold and empty. He hates Minho for thinking too selfishly. He hates that Minho cared so much about his career. He hates that Minho broke up with him because now Jisung can never be the same.

“I-I’ll go,” Minho says, tears filling his eyes again. He rushes away, and Jisung painfully watches the brunette’s back until he is out of sight. 

Jisung lifts his palm and looks at the ring and bracelet, and feels himself burn down. 

\--------

“Jisung, did you make sure to take your anxiety med?” Hyunjin quickly asks as Jisung grabs his sports bag. 

“Oh my god!” Jisung complains, “I’ll take it in the car! I have no time! Gotta head to rehearsal! Almost late! I’m going to go crazy!” he says these all in one breath. Hyunjin clicks his tongue and leaps from his bed.

“You have one full hour, Hannie, take your med, and then go. Look how bouncy and anxious you are right now.”

Jisung lets out an irritated grunt takes his bag off, and opens the zip. 

There he digs into his mess until he finds a specific pill bottle and unscrews the cap. It falls, but he doesn’t bother picking it up - Hyunjin will certainly do that for him. 

He takes in the pill with his water, and Hyunjin certainly handed him the cap. 

Jisung rushes out of their dorm without saying goodbye to his best friend. Mid-way he felt bad, so he runs back, unlocks the door, and smiles at the other, who stares at him with a big pout on his face. “Goodbye, Hyunjinnie!”

Hyunjin smiles. “Bye-bye!”

Jisung gets into the van quickly, situating himself next to Changbin. 

“You ready?” Changbin asks.

“No,” Jisung blatantly replies. 

“Lift your spirits, Jisung. It’ll be all good tonight!” Chan says from his place in the passenger seat. 

It’s been a month and a half so far. The weather grows colder, pinching at the tip of Jisung’s nose. Situations have been cleared relatively quickly. 

Changbin’s plan worked wonders. Minho’s made up a claim on Twitter that the pictures were just edits of his and Jisung’s head onto random photos made not only the fans angry at Minho, but it also completely washed away the news. Jisung was saved from getting in trouble with the company (and also, the CEO was quite happy to see that 3RACHA’s popularity skyrocketed.) 

Now Jisung is only left with anxiety. Something that planted itself into Jisung’s insides and tortured him day and night. He couldn’t face the crowd without feeling so sick and breathless. He would break down in the waiting rooms, and Chan and Changbin would have to calm him down. He chose to get treatment for his condition because it was what he wanted for himself. Thankfully, it helps, and the feelings are much more at bay and don’t grow wild too often. 

They end up on the stage for rehearsal, and this is when Jisung appreciates how he bundled himself well for the cold. He begins to warm up a lot once he starts practicing hard. 

After rehearsal, Chan pulls Jisung and Changbin into a group hug, a hug enveloping Jisung in warmth. Even if it’s nothing like the hug a certain person gave him a lot, he is still happy to have the two people he loves and cares so much about giving him the warmth he needs. 

The concert came to an end, it was so great. After their farewells with the fans, they head back inside. 

“Jisung, how do you feel?” Chan asks.

“Better than before,” Jisung says and gives the leader an assuring smile.

“Did you take-”

“Yes, I did, Hyunjin reminded me to.” Jisung laughs.

“Thank goodness he did.” Chan sighs. “Anyway, should we fill our stomachs? I feel so hungry.” 

They enjoyed the warm food at the restaurant and chattered about the concert and their plans for their two-week vacation. Jisung didn’t have too many plans but likely would spend time with his friends and visit his family near the end. And he, Hyunjin, Felix, and Seungmin plan to move out of the cruddy dorms and rent an apartment together. 

He also wishes to spend some time with a certain someone, but they were long over. 

\--------

After his classes, Jisung ends up at the certain someone’s apartment door; he arrives because forgetting him is complicated. He just wants to see if he is doing alright - or maybe he seeks to potentially renew their relationship; it’s definitely that. He misses his brown eyes that kept in the stars, and he misses the way they used to be together. 

He takes in a deep breath to calm his nerves that were beginning to bubble up.  _ It’s going to be okay _ , he tells himself in his speeding mind. He knocks on the door, and immediately it opens. He doesn’t see Minho, but he does see his friend, San, who suddenly looks so pale.

“J-Jisung?” he mutters. Jisung can already tell that his presence isn’t doing any good. 

Someone else shows up beside San, turning pale as well, that someone is Seonghwa. “Why are you here?” Seonghwa asks.

“Just to check in with Minho.”

“Aren’t you two over? Why are you wanting to show him your face? He recovered, but you will only paint the feelings he pushed away back,” Seonghwa states; there isn’t any anger in his tone, but his words seep into Jisung’s heart and give it pain.

“Is Minho here?” he peeks past San’s shoulder and finds Minho’s other friends putting things into boxes.

“No, he is with his parents,” San replies quickly. 

“What are you all doing with those boxes?” Jisung asks; Seonghwa lets out a light sigh of annoyance. 

“We are helping him clean up.” A lie, but Jisung doesn’t say anything about it. The boxes show that Minho is switching to a new place, leaving behind his memories. If they say that he recovered and is doing well now, then Jisung shall not interfere and suffer alone. 

He turns away and heads down the hall until he reaches the elevator. 

He exits the building, and before he can near the bus stop, someone grabs his arm and tugs him quickly into a dark alleyway. 

Anger fills Jisung when he sees that it is Daekhwa staring at him with smugness. 

“What are-” Daekhwa suddenly pushes a cloth against Jisung’s mouth and nose, and no matter how hard he tries to fight back, the chemicals eventually take him away. 

“Good night,” was the last thing Jisung hears. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How do you feel? :') 
> 
> In the next chapter, one of these characters (Minho, Jisung, Jeongin) will possibly die by murder. 
> 
> I hoped you enjoyed this chapter~! Prepare yourselves for the next one because it's so much darker and disturbingly sad :(


	35. Tamed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: kidnapping, rape, and assault. 
> 
> If these trigger you please don't read this chapter.
> 
> -
> 
> I read over this chapter quickly so forgive me for any mistakes ^^; I hope you kind of enjoy this crappiest unhappiest chapter. This is the worst it can get, the rest of the chapters will just be gloomy :(

His head feels so fuzzy; he hears ringing in his ears; after opening his eyes, the problems clear away, leaving him with relief. He finds himself in an unfamiliar place - specifically a living room. 

Jisung lifts his upper body from the floor and feels pain radiate from his entire back; has he been sleeping on his cold hardwood floor? It’s so uncomfortable; he doesn’t even know how he managed to get adequate sleep off of that position. 

Jisung’s attention to his pain vanishes when his interests land on the decorations implemented around the living room neatly - giving this area a cozy and welcoming vibe. The only problem is that Jisung doesn’t very much at all feel welcomed here; he is confused and scared. How did he end up here? He doesn’t recognize this place at all. 

He lets out a sigh and then looks down at his wrist; his eyes grow wide when he sees that he is handcuffed to the coffee table. Instantly, last night's event shoots into his mind, and he gasps loudly. Daekhwa kidnapped him. 

Fuck, fuck, fuck, _ fuck! _

That psycho isn’t stopping. 

With his unbound right hand, he pats around his jeans pockets to find his phone because he wanted to call for help. However, his phone isn’t anywhere on him, so he frowns out of frustration. Daekhwa must have taken it from him. 

The thought of being trapped here in Daekhwa’s place for a long time suddenly dawns over him, and a tide of anxiety soaks him. His heart begins thundering against his chest, and he starts chewing on his dry bottom lip as he thinks so many things. 

Could he get out right now? Jisung looks down at the handcuff - hah, no. The only thing he could do was to look around, and that's what he does. He looks around from his spot to see if Daekhwa is anywhere here, but he doesn’t spot that psycho anywhere. He guesses he is here alone for now. It isn’t too bad being stuck here alone. There is this small pinch of joy within Jisung because he doesn’t even want to talk to that crazy fuck right now. 

The joy eventually fades away, and he grows tired of sitting on the floor with nothing to do. Jisung could already feel his sanity decaying, and on top of that, he faces so many mood swings. 

At one point, he is crying because he misses everyone and he doesn’t want to be here, and then his mood swaps into anger because he is here suffering because of Daekhwa; that person is fucked up in the head. Jail has a spot saved for his ass. 

Jisung’s anger dies down and exchanges with boredom, which makes him start practicing his lines when he doesn’t need to, and then he begins singing some sad songs and ends up crying again. It feels so good to cry.

The front door opens, and the nightmare comes inside. His eyes land on Jisung, and he sends him a smirk. It’s a smirk that Jisung wants to scratch away violently and have him bleed out and die. 

“Aren’t you happy that we have winter break now? Finals were so hard.” Jisung’s heart sinks when he hears the word ‘final’; he missed his last two finals today all because of that piece of shit!

“I fucking hate you! You are a fucking psycho! Let me out!” Jisung screams uselessly at the other. 

Daekhwa throws his backpack against the wall, storms over to Jisung, and slaps him on the face vigorously. Jisung lowers his head in despair, and water begins to leak out of his eyes. “Do you want the others to hear you, you brat? I took you for a reason, so shut the fuck up and behave.”

“I have things to do,” Jisung softly replies - scared that he would get hit again. 

“I don’t care about that, I only care about what I feel, and all I feel is happiness because you are here at my place. Don’t you think it’s nice? I’m pretty clean.” 

“I don’t want to be here. Please let me out,” Jisung whimpers, “I’ll do anything for you.”

“Nope,” Daekhwa says and then chuckles, “I will keep you here.”

Those ruthless words spark a wave of sudden anger inside Jisung, and he shoots a glare at the other. “Fucking let me out or else-” he couldn’t finish his sentence as he doesn’t even know what to say as a threat to scare the other. 

“Before you what?” Daekhwa says tauntingly, “Before you call Minho? Don’t bother talking to that stupid shit. If he cared, he would’ve stayed with you, and he wouldn’t have completely cut ties with you.”

“He only did those things because of you,” Jisung snaps back, “I don’t get you! Why are you fucking with me?” 

“I’m not fucking with you yet. Do you want me to do that with you later?” Daekhwa says in a vulgar way that makes Jisung want to throw up. 

“I don’t want to do anything with you! I just want to be out of here! You are so fucking crazy!” 

Daekhwa slaps him again and grabs Jisung’s neck. “Do anything that pisses me off, and I will go as far as killing Minho. I  _ really _ want to kill him.” 

“I-I’m sorry,” Jisung whimpers pathetically and lowers his head again, “I will behave.” He doesn’t want Minho hurt; Daekhwa already did so much to him. Minho needs to breathe for once, and if Jisung has to sacrifice himself for Minho to live on freely, then it’s all okay. He wants Minho to be truly happy. 

\--------

Hyunjin frantically knocks onto Seungmin’s and Felix’s dorm as he sobs. He is so scared and worried about Jisung. The younger didn’t come back to the dorm last night and didn’t show up to school today, and now it’s night. 

Seungmin answers the door, and the smile he pulls on at the sight of Hyunjin drops when he sees how hard he is crying. “Why are you crying?” he asks. Hyunjin only starts crying harder and pushes his way in, and sits at the edge of Seungmin’s bed. Felix stands up from his chair and goes to sit next to Hyunjin. 

“What happened?” Felix asks and starts rubbing Hyunjin's back as a way to calm him down. 

“J-Jisung didn’t come back to our dorm. He didn’t show up to school today. Although he doesn’t like school, he isn’t the type to cut class, especially when finals occurred,” Hyunjin wails, “I’m so scared for his life.” 

“Did he take his meds?” Seungmin asks, this triggers Hyunjin. 

“What can a fucking pill do? I know it helps with his anxiety, but he might have considered death! Plus, his med was at his desk the entire time, untouched! He didn’t take them!” 

“Hyunjin, calm down. I believe you are overthinking. I can assure you that Jisung will be okay. He is strong. He wouldn’t cause himself any harm.” 

“Oh, he wouldn’t?” Hyunjin smacks the mattress beneath him out of fury. "Minho, the person Jisung loves, broke up with him! It damaged Jisung so much! He is suffering!”

“Let’s let today slide, and if Jisung doesn’t show up tomorrow, then let's report him to the police, yeah?” Felix says.

Although Hyunjin wants to find Jisung right away and ensure he is doing okay, he agrees with Felix’s words. Maybe he should give it one more day; maybe Jisung needs some alone time right now away from the others. Maybe Hyunjin might be overthinking. 

\--------

Jisung wakes up, finding himself in a bedroom this time. Even if it feels so good to not wake up from the floor, the idea of being in Daekhwa’s bed, tied, makes him want to cry. 

Jisung doesn’t even feel like a Jisung anymore - he feels like a bird locked in its cage, having nothing else to do but watch the surroundings. 

He begins to cry out of frustration; it’s his second day here, and he yet still couldn’t escape because fucking Daekhwa keeps him tied. 

He immediately stops crying when he hears the door unlocking. “Oh, you’re awake.” Daekhwa smiles happily at him, having no remorse for the tied up Jisung. “You slept pretty well. It’s evening now. Are you hungry? Thirsty? What would you like me to get you?”

“I’m fine,” Jisung answers, his voice sounding so strained. 

“I’ll get you some warm tea. It will help with your throat.” Daekhwa heads out of the room without closing the door. Jisung lets out a breath and turns his head to the side. The dark thoughts creep into his mind again, poisoning him with agony. What happens if he never gets to leave? What if no one finds him? Is anyone trying to find him right now? 

Daekhwa returns with a mug and places it onto the dark brown nightstand. Jisung eyes the cup, and then he eyes Daekhwa; is he supposed to drink that himself? How the fuck is he going to do that when his damn wrists are tied to the bed frame? 

“Right,” Daekhwa mutters in realization, “I will untie you, but you better behave.” 

“I will,” Jisung forces out a cheerful voice, “I promise I won't do anything. I want to drink tea to help my throat feel better.” 

Daekhwa sighs and removes the ropes from Jisung’s wrists. 

Jisung stares at the reddened area with the rope markings and purses his lips. Then he picks up the warm mug, sets his gaze on the orange fluid, and an immediate plan lights his mind in a flash. Should he spill this on Daekhwa’s face and sprint away? Jisung peers at the older and fakes a cutesy smile. He can’t just spill this on him; Daekhwa’s eyes bore attentively on Jisung like an eagle - showing his lack of trust. 

Jisung needs to find a way to earn his trust and later break it when the time comes. Could acting friendly help? 

“This smells nice, is this lemon tea?” 

“Yes,” Daekhwa answers. 

Jisung begins drinking the tea, and his body starts warming up. 

“I’ll be in the shower.” Daekhwa leaves the room, this time closing and locking the door. Fuck, Jisung isn’t able to leave now. 

After finishing his tea, he stands up and walks around the room, trying to search for his phone. He hopes that the device is in this room; he’d be so happy if it were here. He speedwalks over to Daekhwa’s thankfully clean closet and searches through the minimal amounts of clothes for his phone. He makes a fake crying face when he doesn’t find it anywhere within the clothes and closes the door. 

Jisung rushes to the nightstand, opens the drawer, and doesn’t find it there either. He curses under his breath and then looks under the bed. A huge smile of joy forms when he spots his phone and quickly retrieves it. 

Daekhwa is (thankfully) so damn stupid; out of all places, he hid it under his  _ bed?  _

Jisung turns on his phone and immediately sees notification of Seungmin’s, Felix’s, and Hyunjin’s messages on the lock screen. He unlocks his phone and chooses to open Hyunjin’s DM. Jisung doesn’t want to waste his time reading all of Hyunjin’s messages and instead sends his best friend a quick text.

Jisung [4:43 PM]: Please help me.

He was going to type more than that but couldn’t bring himself to do so because he feels so weird and sick all of a sudden. The weirdness started from his stomach and then traveled to his groin. What the hell? Did Daekhwa spike his drink?

Jisung powers off his phone again and slips it back to where it originally was before getting on the bed. He starts groaning from the discomfort and squeezes his thighs together to suppress this feeling. 

“Did you finish your tea?” Daekhwa steps into the room and closes the door behind him. Jisung looks at him before averting his gaze. “You look so cute when you are struggling.” Daekhwa gets onto the bed and pushes Jisung’s upper body down onto the mattress. “You’re always so cute. This is what I love about you.”

“Get off of me, you fucking creep!” Jisung screams at him and punches him in the face. As Daekhwa rubs his face in pain, Jisung dashes to the door, rips it open and sprints through the living room, unlocks the front door-

“Not so fast, brat!” Daekhwa circles his arms around Jisung’s waist before he could open the door and escape. 

“Fuck off, shit face!” Jisung writhes around, and Daekhwa slams him against the wall beside the door. 

“I told you to fucking behave!” Daekhwa slaps Jisung and then harshly grabs his chin. “Do you want to be the reason why Minho dies?”

“N-No.” Jisung believes he really should start behaving; he doesn’t want Daekhwa to land a finger on Minho and hurt him all over again. Daekhwa’s been a shit to him and ruined him. 

Daekhwa grabs Jisung’s hair and yanks his head to the side. “Then stop fucking around and listen! It’s not that hard!” His disgusting lips land on Jisung’s neck, and shamelessly he begins kissing around and sucking his skin, leaving marks.

“Did you drug the tea?” Jisung asks, feeling himself giving into Daekhwa’s kisses. 

“Yes, I did,” Daekhwa nonchalantly admits and pulls down the zip of Jisung’s jeans. Jisung begins to squirm, not wanting Daekhwa to take things too far, but the other’s hand doesn’t hesitate and rests over Jisung’s dick that is a complete traitor. Why is it reacting like this by the touches of that creep? “Aw, look who is so hard.”  _ It’s because of the tea you drugged! _ Jisung wanted to scream, but could he? No. Because he has to behave. 

They end up on the couch, both completely naked. Jisung is a heavily breathing mess wanting to get this over with fast; he doesn’t want to deal with these feelings anymore. He wants the drugs' effects to wear off fast; he doesn’t like doing this with someone he hates with all his life. 

Daekhwa enters Jisung without any lube, and from the pain, Jisung bites onto his bottom lip to prevent a cry from running out. He wishes it were Minho because the brunette would stop if he notices Jisung isn’t okay, and he is so much more gentle and careful. 

“Ahh, Minho-”

Daekhwa thrusts harshly instead of Jisung, making him let out a cry. “I’m the one fucking you, but the one you are thinking about is Minho? Shameless. I will make you only think of me.”

He continues off harshly.

He finishes and picks the soulless Jisung up and returns to his room - tying his wrists from the frame. Jisung doesn’t fight back. 

He is scarred. 

\--------

All Jisung wants is to be safely home. How long has it been so far? Three days? Four days? Jisung doesn’t even keep track because most of his mind is consumed by fear. The fear that Daekhwa wouldn’t ever let him go. 

Currently, Jisung lies in bed, crying. He had just finished taking a shower - with Daekhwa - and it all went wrong. Jisung just wanted a peaceful shower since he didn’t take one ever since he ended up here, and Daekhwa chose to join him and fuck him there. Jisung just feels like Daekhwa’s fuck toy.

He calms himself down, scrambles out of bed, and grabs the phone from underneath. He turns it on and opens Hyunjin’s DM, finding many messages there. Jisung is safe from the creep for now - Daekhwa is currently in the living room, watching a movie alone. Jisung didn't want to join him, so Daekhwa locked him in this room out of pettiness. 

Jisung [5:44 PM] I’m stuck at Daekhwa’s place. He kidnapped me and is doing so many bad things to me. I feel so scared. Please, help me quickly. I don’t want to be here any longer. He has been hurting me! 

Hyunjin [5:45 PM]: Oh my god! I’m so happy to see that you are still alive! Fucking Daekhwa! I will fucking kill him!

Jisung [5:46 PM]: Hyunjin, don’t tell him anything! He will know that I informed you!

For minutes Hyunjin doesn’t reply, and Jisung sulks.

Jisung [5:52 PM PM] Hyunjin? Are you there?

When Hyunjin doesn’t reply, Jisung sighs, turns off the screen, puts it back underneath the bed, and lays down. 

\--------

Hyunjin now sits on Jeongin's bed with his hands crushed between his thighs to keep them warm as he cries. He and Jeongin searched the internet for Daekhwa's address but couldn't find it. Hyunjin feels like success is so far away. 

Jeongin has his arm around Hyunjin and his head resting against his shoulder. "Baby, don't be upset. We can work on it." 

"I feel like a bad friend," Hyunjin wails; he feels Jeongin lift his head from his shoulder, and the younger stares right at him. "I wasn't there for him. As his friend, I should always be there for him, I should've protected him, but I didn't do anything. He was having a hard time, and I wasn't much help. I failed as a friend." 

"Don't beat yourself up. Jisung getting kidnapped by a dickhead was out of your control. Hyunjin, you are Jisung's best friend; you are not his bodyguard. You don't need to keep an eye on him at all times because you have your life to focus on too. Don't make yourself think that you failed as a friend just because of that distressing situation. You tried hard to find him, and you are worried about Jisung now; this shows how much you care about him. Let's not lose hope; we need to brainstorm and search more, yeah?" 

Hyunjin nods and wipes away his tears with his sleeves. His sobs didn't yet stop, but he does feel a little more hopeful now. "I love you so much, Jeongin." Jeongin smiles brightly at those words and wraps his arms around Hyunjin to pull the taller boy into a tight, comforting hug. 

“I love you too, Jinnie.” Jeongin lets go of Hyunjin and caresses his cheek. “Do you have any plans in mind? And are the others going to help out?”

“Seungmin, Changbin, Chan, and Felix are helping with moving the stuff out of our dorms since we don’t have a lot of time. After Jisung texted me about where he was, I called Jihoon, asking him if he could track Daekhwa’s address, but he couldn’t. The police haven’t updated us yet.” Hyunjin sighs. “The success of finding Jisung seems to be so far away and would take forever to get to, but as you said, let's not lose hope.”

“Yes, baby, let’s think hard,” Jeongin says and kisses Hyunjin on the forehead, “Is there anyone else we could ask? Did you tell Minho about this yet?”

Hyunjin makes a face at hearing Minho’s name. “Minho threw Jisung away himself. He is a heart-breaking rat. I wouldn’t even bother talking to him.”

“How about we do it for Jisung, and after that, you can completely cut ties with him if you’d like?” Jeongin recommends. 

Hyunjin lets out a huff and nods. For Jisung, only for Jisung. 

\--------

Hyunjin texts Minho to meet him at the large café by the university. Both Jeongin and Hyunjin ordered hot chocolate, which the bartender prepared pretty quickly. The drink's warmth settled well inside Hyunjin's stomach, giving him a feeling of comfort.

"Look," Jeongin speaks, his head turned towards the window, "It's raining."

Hyunjin turns his head as well and frowns. "I am not appropriately dressed for this." 

"Want my hoodie?" Jeongin asks. 

"It's fine. I want you to stay warm; I think I can manage," Hyunjin says assuringly. 

After about twenty minutes of waiting, Minho shows up. He finds Jeongin and Hyunjin and makes his way over to the table. He doesn't look too happy to be here. Minho throws himself down at the open spot across from Hyunjin like an angry child and turns his head over to him.

"What is it?" he mutters in irritation. 

"What's with the attitude?" Hyunjin snaps back, "You always act like-"

Jeongin places his hand on Hyunjin’s thigh and leans close to his ear. “Remember why you texted him to come here.”

“Hurry, I have no time,” Minho grumbles. 

“Jisung-”

“Don’t say his name! Is that why you asked me to come here? To have us be in a relationship again? It’s not going to work-”

“You didn’t let me finish! I wanted to tell you that Jisung is in danger!” Hyunjin states, pissed with Minho’s current behavior. This is why Hyunjin dislikes Minho; sometimes, the other can be such a bitch at times. Hyunjin doesn’t like his character at all. No matter how sweetly Minho used to treat Jisung, Hyunjin can never make himself trust Minho nor let alone like him fully. 

“I don’t believe you,” Minho says and rolls his eyes. 

Hyunjin’s mouth drops open to an ‘o’, and he stares at the other silently in utter disappointment before he speaks, “Daekhwa took Jisung and is hurting him.” 

Now Minho's fucking eyes grow wide - appalled by the words. Tears of sadness form in his eyes, and when he blinks, they spill. He quickly pulls out his phone and frantically taps the screen. 

“This is where Jisung is.” He shows his phone over to the two. Hyunjin was so happy to see that Minho and Jisung shared locations. It is making things so much easier now. 

"Send me the address. I will forward it to Jihoon and call him!" Hyunjin says happily. Minho does as told, and Hyunjin gets out his phone, copies Minho's text, and sends that text to Jihoon. Then Hyunjin calls the other, informing him that the address sent is the address Daekhwa is in. Jihoon thanked Hyunjin so many times and said that he would be there with the police. 

Minho makes Hyunjin and Jeongin get in the car and instantly drives to that specific place, which thankfully wasn't too far away. The height of the apartment building makes Hyunjin frown. Wait- the police would likely ask the landlord for the exact address instead of searching each floor. 

The three get out of the car and approach the building. Hyunjin wishes he didn't wear just a cardigan because the rain seeped through the thin fabric and also soaked his hair. 

Minho pulls on his coat's hood and looks around. "How long are they going to take?" 

"I don't know." Hyunjin sighs. 

"What the fuck!" Hyunjin hears a familiar voice bellow, and he spins in the direction of the sound. There he finds Daekhwa standing there burning with fury, and in his hand is a bag. Perfect timing. "This is definitely Jisung's doing, that brat!" 

“Jisung is no brat, you crazy asshole!” Minho screams at him. “The police are coming here! Your ass will be in jail, and I will make sure of that. My mom is the best lawyer in South Korea! She has a high win rate. Lo-ser!”

“Oh, we’ll see about that. Catch me if you can, dickhead,” Daekhwa says with a smirk and immediately drops his bag and sprints away.

“Wow! Lee, Minho! Way to go! Isn’t it so nice that you have such a big mouth?” Jeongin sarcastically utters.

“Sorry, I couldn’t hold in my anger. Let’s go after him,” Minho says. The three of them begin to run after Daekhwa, who annoyingly runs so freaking fast. What’s more annoying than that, though, is how he keeps on making turns at buildings.

Eventually, they lose him and wait in the alleyway to catch their breaths.

The rain begins to downfall harshly, and a rumble of thunder sounds in the dark starless sky. 

"Great, I'm completely wet," Hyunjin growls out angrily and punches the wall. 

“Hyunjin,” Jeongin scolds, grabs Hyunjin’s wrist, and presses kisses against his knuckle. “We need to remain calm.” 

“It sucks that it is dark out. It's making it harder to find Daekhwa,” Minho comments. Hyunjin crosses his arms over his chest to keep himself warm. “The rain is going to make this twice as hard." Minho glares at Hyunjin. "You should've told me about this earlier." 

“Does it look like I even want to talk to you? The only reason why I asked you was just for Jisung,” Hyunjin remarks, “After this, I’m completely going to cut ties with you.”

“Don’t fight each other. Let’s find that bastard. I’ve recovered my breaths.” Jeongin gestures for them to walk, and they walk through the dark alleyway.

“How many years in prison do you think Daekhwa should get?” Minho asks out of the blue. 

Hyunjin finds himself laughing sadly at that question. “For what he put you and Jisung through, I think he deserves the death penalty.” 

“Sounds fair enough,” Minho replies, “Jeongin, what do you think?”

There is no reply from the other, and worry immediately falls into Hyunjin's stomach. He turns around and doesn't find Jeongin anywhere near. Did he go in another direction? 

"Jeongin?" he calls out for him but doesn't get a response. 

“What the fuck! Where did he go?” Minho growls.

Hyunjin grabs his phone and turns on the flashlight. “Let’s go back to that alleyway.”

They head back into the alleyway they came out of earlier and looked around. 

“Oh my fucking god!” Minho lets out a yelp. Hyunjin eyes well up with tears, and he flashes his light to where Minho was. The brunette is looking down in a panicked way, so Hyunjin lowers the light and finds Jeongin on the ground sideways, his face scrunched up in pain. 

Hyunjin’s face crumbles up as he begins crying, and he rushes to his boyfriend and touches his face. “What happened?!”

Minho starts talking on the phone, calling for an ambulance. 

“Daekhwa thought I was Minho…” Jeongin croaks out, “He said that he finall- I feel so weak.”

Hyunjin cries harder. “Don’t die on me, please!” 

“Who sh-should I die then?” Jeongin says jokingly, but Hyunjin’s blood boils because he doesn’t want any joking around to happen. After all, they are in a serious situation. 

“What did Daekhwa say to you?” Minho asks after finishing his call. 

“Oh- he said that he finally got what he wanted and rushed away,” Jeongin continues, groans, and speaks again, “In my next life will I have…” he places his hand near the spot where the pocket knife pierces in, "a birthmark here?" 

“You are not going to die!” Hyunjin screams at him and pulls Jeongin's hand away from the affected area, “The ambulance will come for you.”

Suddenly Hyunjin’s phone lights up; when he sees Jihoon's name, he looks at Jeongin. “Please continue to talk to me, okay?”

Jeongin nods and smiles up at him. Hyunjin quickly leans down and presses a kiss against his lips, and then answers the phone. “Hyunjin! Where the hell are you guys at? We came but didn’t see you here!”

“Hyunjin, you are so beautiful...I love you so much...I love you all with my life. Meeting you was a blessing. You are a blessing to my life.” Hyunjin’s throat clogs up, and heavy tears leave his eyes.

Minho snatches the phone from Hyunjin’s hand. “We are in the alleyway! Jeongin just got stabbed by Daekhwa, and the bitch ran off.” 

“Jeongin, please don’t talk like you are about to die, please don’t,” Hyunjin whines.

“Dying wouldn’t be a bad thing for me. I get to escape all the struggles of my life,” Jeongin claims and chuckles sadly.

“Jeongin, no, no, please don’t give up on yourself,” Hyunjin continues to cry; Jeongin lifts himself upright and grunts from the pain. “Why are you moving!” Hyunjin screams at him. Jeongin lets out another bitter laugh.

Within a few minutes, the ambulance shows up and takes Hyunjin and Jeongin away quickly. 

\--------

Daekhwa went to the supermarket to get some food for the two of them. Jisung couldn't grab his phone because he is bound to the coffee table with the tv on. He isn’t interested in the show playing right before him. All he feels is hopelessness. He just wants to die. There is no way he can get out of here. He tried to drag the coffee table, but it was heavy for him as he grew weak from barely eating. 

Only until he hears pounding on the door does his eyes lit up with joy. 

The door opens, and he sees three officers rush inside. They break him from the handcuffs, and Jihoon lifts Jisung from the ground and pulls him into a tight hug. 

“T-Thank you for finding me," Jisung cries.

“Jisung, kiddo, I’m so happy to see you are okay.”

Jisung presses his face against Jihoon's cold and wet jacket to stifle his embarrassing sobs.

"Take him to the police station. They will ask him some questions," one of the officers state. "This Daekhwa person stabbed someone and ran off. There are currently other officers in the search for him." 

"Who did he stab?" Jisung asks. The officers don't answer the question and start looking around the living room for some reason. 

Jihoon grabs Jisung's hand. "Let's go." He pulls him out of the apartment, and Jisung finally felt a wave of relief wash over him. That place was hell. 

They wait for the elevator to arrive, and when the doors open, Jisung spots Minho inside, all drenched from the rain and shivering. A sob rips from Jisung again, and he rushes into the elevator to hug Minho. The brunette wraps his arms around Jisung tightly and kisses him on the side of the head. 

"Are you okay?" Minho asks when they pull away from each other.

"Does it look like I'm okay?" Jisung whimpers, "I was there for around four days. And Daekhwa was so harsh on me. When I misbehaved, he threatened to kill you. "

"I should've checked your location every day. I'm such an idiot," Minho replies and rakes his fingers through his wet hair in frustration, "No one told me about you going missing until today. I think they are all pissed off at me for dumping you." 

"He  _ dumped _ you?" Jihoon growls

"Hyung, don't get mad at him. He did it because he didn't want to impact my career." Jisung rapidly wipes away the tears that were streaming down his cheeks. "Minho, Thank you for coming here. I missed you."

Minho places his hands on Jisung's waist and crashes his lips against Jisung's into a passionate kiss. Jisung's hand snakes up to Minho's wet hair, and he slides his fingers through the cold and slick locks. 

When the elevator stops on the main floor, the three of them exit. Before Jisung could get any further, Minho grabs his arm and turns him around. "What the fuck. What is that?" Minho asks coldly, his eyes burning at Jisung's neck. Jihoon steps up and looks at the same place, too, his eyebrows drawing together in concern.

Jisung couldn't tell Minho that they were bug bites; so many of Daekhwa's markings were around his neck. It's obvious. 

"What did he do to you?" Minho asks sternly, "And don't lie."

"He didn't do anything," Jisung mutters. Minho's eyes were sharp on Jisung's, presenting his intense amounts of anger, making Jisung feel himself growing smaller and smaller. When Jisung doesn't say or do anything else, Minho grabs the hem of his shirt and lifts it. There was so much there as well. There are scratches and bruises.

"I think Daekhwa assaulted him," Jihoon states, "We need to report this to the police as well." 

"I think there is more to this than just assault. I need to make sure," Minho asserts and grabs Jisung's hand, "I'll take him to the bathroom to check other places. Is that okay with you?"

"Yes, it's fine, and please hurry," Jihoon replies.

"Minho, there really isn't anything else to see," Jisung lies and tries to pull his hand away; his attempt failed as Minho has a firm grasp on him. 

"You're lying to me." Minho rolls his eyes. "I'm sure he did more things on you. He didn't go as far as-"

"No!" Jisung cuts him off with a sudden shout, "He did nothing else to me, I swear!"

Minho doesn't look convinced, but he does give up. He lets go of Jisung's hand. "Fine then. To the police station we go." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, Jeongin isn't going to die :D Um, I did a coin flip to determine if he dies or not *sweats nervously* head was life and tails was death, and it landed on heads! :D Then just for fun, I switched it up, and made heads death and tails life, and it landed on tails. I think the coin didn't want Jeongin to die either lmao. Even if the side ended up being death, I still would've kept Jeongin alive because my heart won't let me kill him off :''))) 
> 
> I hope you enjoyed your new year! Stay safe and I hope you achieve your goals! 💜💜💜


	36. Always and Forever

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Mentioned character death, mentioned rape

At the courthouse, they all are - in a trial for Daekhwa’s multiple offenses. Minho came with his Mom, Daekhwa came with his lawyer, and his orange jail uniform that looked so suitable on him. Jisung came with his tears - that couldn’t stop flowing out of his eyes - and Hyunjin and Jeongin came along as well. 

On the table at the left section sat Daekhwa and his lawyer, and on the right section sat Minho and his Mom. Behind them were Jisung, Hyunjin, and Jeongin. Hyunjin is holding tightly onto Jisung’s hand, trying his very best to get him to calm down. Jisung is unable to control his heavy emotions. Being here in the courtroom is something new for him.

“Suspect, Jeongin Daekhwa; you are here with accusations for kidnapping and assaulting Han Jisung. Blackmailing and assaulting Lee Minho and for attempted first-degree murder towards Yang Jeongin. Is that correct?” The judge questions, his eyes are penetrating Daekhwa. 

“Yes,” Daekhwa confirms. 

“And is your lawyer present?”

“Yes, I am Jeon Daekhwa’s lawyer, Jang Taehyuk, and I will be representing him,” Daekhwa’s lawyer answers.

“Here I have clear evidence suggesting that you kidnapped Han Jisung…” Jisung lowers his head and presses his hand against his mouth to cover in the sobs. Hyunjin exhales with melancholy and places his warm hand on Jisung’s thigh, letting him know that he is right by him and ready to support him. Jisung lifts his head, moves his hand from his mouth to wipe away his tears. 

Minho turns around from his spot and peers worriedly at Jisung. He doesn’t say anything as they aren’t supposed to talk, but Minho does mouth what seems to be an ‘it’ll be alright’ before turning back forward. 

“All the accusations are lies. I did not kidnap Jisung. He wanted-”

Minho smashes his fist against the table and stands up. “The fuck he didn’t, you bitch! You-”

“Lee Minho,” his Mom cuts in sternly and pulls Minho back down to his seat. 

“You will get a chance to speak when I say so,” the judge claims, and then returns his focus on Daekhwa, “Continue.”

“As I was saying, I did not kidnap Jisung. He wanted to come to my place. I, of course, allowed him to without knowing that he had plans of sabotaging me with lies and manipulating others with his fake-act of innocence.” Daekhwa’s words stab right through Jisung’s stomach.

“Lying bitch!” Minho growls, “You fucking-”

“Verbalizing your anger and cursing in this courtroom is a serious offense, and I can sentence you to prison. Show respect whether or not you like it, or else you will have to face the consequences for your unsatisfactory behavior.” The judge's words silence Minho up, and he leans back against his chair in frustration.

“I’m sorry, Jeon Daekhwa, please continue,” the judge says yet again. 

“It was all staged. Han Jisung and Lee Minho both planned it all out because they have something against me. It’s nothing new actually, they always make me the bad person when I’m most definitely not. And as for stabbing Minho, it was out of self-defense; he was trying to kill me himself.” 

Jeongin scoffs. “Your hon-”

The judge turns to Jisung. “Victim, Han Jisung, is this all true?” Here it comes, the piles of panic filling into his stomach because he is now the center of attention. An imaginary rope tightens around his stomach, his heart begins to race, and cold sweat streams down his neck. 

He manages to stand up; his mind is unsteady; it feels like it is spinning, making him lose control.  _ Speak, _ he screams to himself in his mind;  _ they are all watching you, speak! _ “A-All of w-what he said is- it is- false.” Jisung places his hand onto his stomach, and Hyunjin grabs his arm and pulls him down.

Minho’s Mom stands up and approaches the table Daekhwa is at. “So you were saying that Han Jisung willingly came along with you? Willingly stayed over for days? I don’t think that is the case. In fact, Han Jisung texted Hwang Hyunjin himself pleading for help.”

“I object.” Daekhwa’s lawyer stands and walks over to the right section. “By any chance, is Jisung mentally unstable? To me, it seems like it.” He glances at Jisung, who drops his head, feeling ashamed for some reason. “He needs that friend of his for emotional support and can’t even speak for himself. His mental unstableness made him act up and accuse Daek-”

“What does mental health have to do with kidnapping?” Minho’s Mom questions, “Han Jisung was  _ kidnapped _ by Jeon Daekhwa, causing him trauma, and you are degrading him for that?”

Jisung nears his mouth to Hyunjin’s ear. “I need to get out of here, please.”

“I don’t think we can,” Hyunjin whispers back.

“Please,” Jisung responds, “I’m getting sick.”

“Your honor.” Minho’s Mom turns to the judge. “Is it okay for Hwang Hyunjin and Han Jisung to step out? Han Jisung isn’t currently feeling well. For the remainder of this trial, I would speak on his behalf.” 

“Oh, your honor, can I take a short break? I need to take a sh- poop,” Minho states.

The judge looks at Minho suspiciously before he approves of their leave. The three of them silently leave the courtroom and end up in the large clean lobby with a few people waiting in seats. Jisung lands on his knees, and Hyunjin desperately kneels by his side and tries to calm him down. Minho, however, lifts Jisung bridal style instantly and hurries him into the bathroom. He heads inside one of the stalls, places Jisung down on the toilet, and puts his hands on Jisung’s thighs. 

“I know you’re not feeling well about this, and I know Daekhwa is such an ass in there by lying but don’t worry about it.” Tears slipped out of Jisung’s eyes. “Jisung, sweetie…” Minho reaches up and wipes them away. “Don’t cry. It will all be okay. We  _ will _ win.”

“What if they believe his lies?” Jisung asks.

“I’m sure they won't because there is strong enough evidence, and I still have to play the recording.” 

Jisung nods as a response and bites onto his bottom lip, his worries not yet fading away despite Minho’s firm words. Minho catches the worries, stands up and pulls Jisung up as well, and kisses him softly on the lips. “It will all be over soon. Don’t worry about it.” Minho sighs. “I have to get going now. I shouldn’t be out for too long, or else the judge would question me.”

The two leave the bathroom, and Minho heads away to the courtroom. Jisung finds Hyunjin sitting at the very back against the wall and sits next to him. Hyunjin smiles at him. “Are you feeling better?” Jisung only gives him a nod. For the next few minutes, the two stay silent until Hyunjin starts talking shit about Daekhwa, wanting him to get the punishment he deserves. Hyunjin's furious confessions make Jisung feel better and make him temporarily forget about his worries. 

“We’re back!” Jeongin exclaims; Hyunjin leaps up from his spot and heads over to his boyfriend to hug him. 

“Daekhwa is guilty. He fucking contradicted himself!” Minho bursts out into laughter. “You know how he said that he stabbed Jeongin out of self-defense? After so many questions, he got so overwhelmed that he ended up saying that he thought Jeongin was me, which proved that Daekhwa had intentions of killing. After stupidly contradicting himself, he couldn’t defend himself properly and admitted to everything. He will be sentenced to death because of his amounts of offenses.” 

_ Death penalty? _ Those words aren’t sitting in well for Jisung, and he feels so guilty. He doesn’t want Daekhwa to die over what he did. He is pulled out of his thoughts when Minho sits next to him, and he touches Jisung's hair to fix up the mess. “You are feeling better now?” Jisung smiles at Minho, making the other release a happy breath and press his lips against Jisung’s.

“I love you,” Jisung finds himself saying to Minho. Here it goes again; Minho doesn’t say the words back, and his reaction proves that he wasn’t comfortable with those words. Jisung could see the sadness within the depth of his eyes. What is there to even expect? Minho clearly said that they shouldn’t be together. 

Minho drives Jisung, Hyunijn, and Jeongin to their place; Hyunjin and Jeongin were the only two to head inside the building while Jisung remains, wanting to talk to Minho more to get some answers. 

“Minho, do you not love me anymore?” Jisung asks him; Minho tightens his grip on the steering wheel. 

“I think it would be fair to tell you that I am disappearing. I don’t want you to spend the rest of your days confused.” Those words inflict pain within Jisung, and his stupid tears effortlessly slip out of his eyes. Minho lets go of the steering wheel and turns his body over to Jisung. “No, don’t cry, don’t make me feel so bad.” 

“Why do you want to disappear from me?”

Minho sighs, a sigh so cold and sad that it makes Jisung grow sadder. “To seek peace. I have to run away from the things that are causing me trouble. I’ve planned this since November ever since I got an offer from a university to transfer there. I’ve already moved into my new apartment.”

“Minho, I wish you could somehow get inside my body to feel the amount of pain I am feeling in my heart. You are being so selfish right now,” Jisung cries and looks at the other pleadingly through his wet eyes. “Please tell me where you would be. Which university are you attending next semester?” 

Minho shakes his head. “I can’t, Jisung. No one needs to know about my whereabouts; the only ones that know are the ones who have helped me move into my new apartment. I’ve told them not to tell you anything, so don’t bother asking them. Jisung-” Minho grabs both of Jisung’s hands, “I need to be away and start fresh to make myself feel better.” 

Jisung begins to shake. “C-Can I come with you?”

“I think it’s time for you to go back to your place.” Minho let go of Jisung’s hands. “I want you to be happy and live on well without me. Heck, even find someone better than me.”

“Minho, the someone better is you, and no one else can ever take that place. You fill my heart even after the mistakes you’ve made. If you leave, I don’t think I will ever be happy because you are my main source of happiness,” Jisung chokes out, “The kisses you gave me today, what were they for? Why did you kiss me?” 

Minho doesn’t respond, and his eyes fill up with tears that stubbornly remain in place. Jisung searches in the brunette’s eyes frantically, trying to find the love in them, but all he sees is pain. 

“Do you love me? Don’t beat around the bush. Tell me the truth,” Jisung demands. 

The tears leave Minho’s eyes, and he wipes them away quickly. “I-I can’t say.” 

“Give me a direct answer because that’s what I need right now!” 

“Jisung, it’s getting darker now. I think you should leave-”

“Don’t do this to me. I’m going to break apart.” 

“You want an answer? Fine. I don’t love you anymore, and the kiss? I only kissed you because I knew it would make you feel better. I knew it was going to bring you in some comfort,” Minho quickly replies and turns his body back forward, avoiding Jisung’s gaze. 

Jisung laughs with bitter gloom. “Liar.” Minho drags in a breath at those words and then releases it. “If you want me to leave, then okay. Just know that I will be waiting for you, for however long I have to wait.” A sob rips out of Minho; Jisung turns for the door and quickly leaves his ex’s car. 

The rope connecting their hearts ripped, and when Minho drove away, Jisung’s knee’s hit the pavement, and he let himself cry hard. They are officially over. 

\--------

“Jisung, you need to stop being like this. It is worrying us!” Hyunjin shouts carelessly. Jisung carelessly stares straight ahead, disregarding his friends' words. 

“We understand that you are heartbroken, we know that you are hurting so much, but please don’t bring yourself damage,” next came Felix, his voice sounding so strained that Jisung had to move his eyes from the pale wall to Felix, whose eyes are red and puffy from the harsh crying. 

“Please talk to us. We want to help you,” Seungmin speaks. 

Jisung rips from his comforter, leaves his bed, and pushes past the boys to get out of this room. When he feels tears begin to well up in his eyes, he picks up his pace and locks himself in the bathroom, and firmly presses his palms against the sink counter, and stares at the drain. 

He doesn’t want to talk to anyone about his pain and longing. It’s a pain they wouldn’t understand; they will tell him to forget about Minho when doing so is just so hard. 

Knocking sounds on the door along with a yell from Hyunjin, “Jisung, open the door!”

Jisung raises his head, his eyes meeting with his red eyes in the mirror, reminding him about how much he’s been crying and suffering. His life is becoming duller and duller without Minho by his side to uplift him from his sorrows. 

“Come out from in there, talk to us,” Seungmin begs. 

“No! Leave me alone!” Jisung screams at them and hits the counter, hurting his hand. 

\--------

A week has passed; Jisung remains lying hopelessly in his bed, holding onto his pain. The grey comforter is the only thing protecting him from the stabbing coldness he feels. The comforter silently gives him warmth and hugs when he cries underneath it. 

Jisung hasn’t been putting any effort into himself. He stopped going to therapy, and Seungmin told Chan, who got extremely angry and shouted at Jisung through the phone.

How can he be happy again when he has nothing but a broken heart?

He feels like a hopeless slob that just lays in bed, cries, or watches things in an attempt to distract himself from the brutal reality he doesn’t want to think about. It’s not like he stays in bed from morning to late at night; he does get out to get food or to use the bathroom - that’s some effort, right? 

Nah. Jisung just gets scolded by his three friends for not taking care of himself properly. He doesn’t have the will to put in some effort because he feels like an emotional mess. 

Jisung’s stomach painfully growls, demanding food. The quick sandwich he made a few hours ago wasn’t much help and only lasted for a few hours. He groans, rolls out of bed and drags himself out of his room. 

Seungmin is in the living room lying on the couch wrapped in a pastel pink fleece blanket, his eyes glued to the tv. 

Seungmin and Jisung are currently the only ones here in the apartment. Hyunjin and Felix are out shopping for something. Hyunjin asked Jisung and Seungmin if they wanted to go, but they both declined - Jisung heard Seungmin say that he didn’t want to go because his stomach was hurting very badly - poor soul - and Jisung didn’t want to go just because he didn’t want to go. 

Jisung opens the fridge, searching for some leftovers or something quick to consume, but doesn’t find anything. He examines the inside until he spots a pink bottle of strawberry milk that belongs to Hyunjin; Jisung will just drink that - the other wouldn’t mind, or so Jisung hopes. 

He grabs it, shuts the fridge, and sits at the end of the couch. Seungmin immediately sits up, pauses the cartoon he was watching, and looks at Jisung. “You’re finally here in the living room.” Jisung nods, unscrews the pink cap, and begins drinking the sweet milk. “My stomach hurts so bad. I can't even focus on the cartoon.” 

“Did you take any medicine for it?”

“We don’t have any,” Seungmin replies with a frown.

“How about we go to the drug store together?” Jisung suggests, “I think I need some walking to do.”

Seungmin laughs at those words. “Maybe a little moving around is something we  _ both _ need. You haven’t been active for a week, and I want to clear my mind. I have something I really need to say to you.” 

“You can tell me now if you want.” Jisung puts the cap back on the bottle and sets the bottle onto the floor. 

“Not now. I have a feeling that Hyunjin and Felix will return within a few minutes. They were gone for around an hour already.” Ah, so whatever Seungmin wants to talk about is regarding Hyunjin or Felix, or both. 

“Alright,” Jisung replies, “Should we go to the drug store now?”

“Yeah, the sooner I get the medicine, the better,” Seungmin replies and removes himself from the blanket to stand. 

A knock sounds on the door right when Jisung stood up. Seungmin goes over to the door and opens it; he lets out some kind of happy noise when he sees Chan. He hugs him and lets him in.

Chan pulls him in for a quick kiss. “How are you doing, puppy?” 

“I’m not feeling good. I have a bad stomach ache,” Seungmin replies and grabs Chan’s hand, leading him to the couch. 

“Aw, is there anything I can do for you to make you feel better?” Chan asks with worry, “Would you like a massage?” 

“Yes, please.” 

Jisung starts feeling upset again because the affection the two of them are sharing reminds Jisung of Minho. He desperately wants to see Minho and wants to fix things with him. Jisung wants to search for him, but it feels so daunting because Minho could be anywhere.  _ Well _ , he isn’t overseas because he rented an apartment somewhere here in Seoul. 

“I’ll be in my room,” Jisung says, feeling tears burn in his dried out, tired eyes. 

“Okay, I will come there to talk to you after I finish massaging Seungmin,” Chan says. 

Jisung holds in the groan he wants to let out because of Chan’s words. He doesn’t want to face another lecture from him; his tired mind can’t handle it; it wants to be alone after thinking for several days. 

Jisung gets in his room and lands on his bed, pressing his face against his pillow. 

It’s unfair how Minho left him to dwell like this. Minho must be doing well right now without anyone bothering him. Jisung wonders if Minho is laughing and smiling freely. He should feel happy for him; Minho chose to leave to benefit himself and help himself feel better. Still, Jisung couldn’t bring himself to feel happy for the other because as Minho is on his own, Jisung is struggling through his pain. 

He hears the door open and then close. With quick steps, Chan approaches the bed and places his hand on Jisung’s back. “Don’t be like this. Come on, sit up, and let’s have a big talk.” Jisung pulls himself up and sits at the edge of his bed, and Chan places himself next to Jisung. “I don’t want to force you into doing the things you don’t want to do, but I am really worried for your life. I want you to think about getting back into therapy.”

“I don’t need any support from a random person. I want to deal with everything on my own.” 

Chan snorts. “You can’t deal with everything on your own. Our Jisung is fading right before our eyes; we want you back. Minho left, so what? He was indeed selfish, and you laying here crying and beating yourself over it isn’t going to bring him back. I know it’s hard to let him go because you love him with all your heart, but Minho is the thorn you need to pull out of your heart. Pulling out the painful thorn is what will help you feel better.”

“The thorn is reminding me of him. I need him. I don’t care what you think, Chan, because Minho is all I need right now.” 

Chan exhales loudly out of anger. “I don’t like seeing you doing this to yourself!”

“Then leave and no longer look at my face. I’m fine all alone.” 

Jisung, his peripheral vision, sees Chan wipe away his tears, making him feel somewhat guilty. “Jisung, you are not alone in this. We care about you and want you to get better. What you’re doing to yourself is unhealthy.”

Jisung sighs. “ _ Fine _ . I’ll think about therapy.” 

Chan cracks a little smile. “Thank you.” He leaves Jisung’s room and heads out into the living room. Jisung leaves his room as well to ask Seungmin if he wants to go to the drugstore yet but finds the younger sleeping peacefully on the couch. Chan adjusts the blanket a little and kisses Seungmin on the forehead.

The younger opens his eyes and gazes sleepily at Chan. “Are you leaving?”

Chan kneels in front of him and caresses his cheek. “Yes, love. I’m sorry. I’ll be going to the gym with Changbin in twenty minutes. I hope you feel better. If you feel worse, please let me know so I can help.” He nears Seungmin’s face and kisses him. Chan stands up and turns his head to Jisung. “Jisung, you take care too and think deeply about it, okay?” 

“Yeah, yeah,” Jisung grumbles, “I will, no need to remind me again.” 

When Chan leaves the apartment, Jisung places himself down on the couch. “Do you want to go to the drugstore now?”

“Let me take a nap first. I feel so drained,” Seungmin softly replies. 

“Okay.” 

Later in the evening, after finishing dinner, Seungmin and Jisung head to the drugstore together. They find the aisle with all the digestive medicines, and Seungmin carefully picks out the right one for himself. Jisung only grabs a chocolate bar. 

They head to the checkout counter and place the items down for the lady to scan. As the lady starts scanning, Jisung’s eyes settle at the cigarette boxes on the large shelf behind the lady; he rips his gaze away from them when the lady announces the total.

Jisung pays for the items, and the two leave the drug store. 

Seungmin begins removing the plastic from around the bottle of extra-strength digestive gummies and shoves the wrapper into his coat pocket. He opens the cap, takes out two gummies, and puts it in his mouth.

“Mmm, it tastes so sweet and fruity. You want to try it?”

“No, I shouldn’t eat that if I don’t have a stomach ache,” Jisung states and opens the wrapper of his chocolate bar. “Do you want some?” Seungmin thinks about it for a few seconds before nodding. Jisung extends the bar to him, and Seungmin breaks off a piece and puts it in his mouth.

“Now we walk and talk,” Seungmin says, and they begin to walk through the sidewalk. “Do you want to start first, or should I?” 

“You go first.” Jisung breaks off another piece of chocolate and bites it.

“I feel hurt by Felix.” Jisung turns his head over to Seungmin in concern regarding his statement. “When people close to me ignore me, it hurts me a lot. That’s what I think Felix is doing to me; he has been doing this to me ever since we started moving into our new apartment. He doesn’t ignore me in front of you or Hyunijn, though, but when the two of us are alone, he does. I’m just so confused and don’t think I’ve done anything wrong to him. I even asked him, but he would just tell me that I am overthinking. It hurt me a lot when Felix quickly chose his own room. It made me feel that he did that to separate himself from me.”

Jisung thought Felix wanted his own room to have space for his gaming setups, but now he feels that the other might actually be trying his best to avoid Seungmin. It’s so sad that Felix, someone who doesn’t hurt others at all, is neglecting his friend. 

Jisung chose to have his own room, too, all because he wanted to isolate himself from the others to be able to cry freely.

In the three-bedroom apartment, Seungmin and Hyunjin are the ones to share a room. 

“I don’t know what to say, but I am very sorry you are hurting because of his actions,” Jisung speaks, “Since he isn’t answering your questions, do you want me to ask him for you?”

“No, don’t tell him anything.” They stop at the crosswalk, and Seungmin looks at Jisung, smiling at him. “It’s your turn now.” 

“Should I return to therapy?” Jisung questions.

“I don’t want to make it seem like I forced you to, but if you feel the need to return, then feel free to. Honestly, I want to see you getting better. I want you out of that deep hole of misery and enjoying things again. I want you to feel happy and free.”

“I thought about it. I feel like I am dying right before your eyes. I think I should stop being so stubborn and get professional help for myself. I don’t want to worry you guys anymore. I thought about Chan’s words and the sadness I’m causing you guys.” Jisung begins to tear up. “I think- no! I  _ will _ get professional help.”

When the light signals that they can cross, they begin walking, and once safely on the other side, Seungmin pulls Jisung in for a hug. “I’m so proud of you.”

Jisung wraps his arms around Seungmin as well. “I’m glad you are. Is your stomach starting to feel any better?”

“Maybe I am forgetting about the pain because of the happiness I feel from your words,” Seungmin jokingly says.

Jisung laughs genuinely at that. “I’m glad it did.” 

Seungmin pulls away and links his arms with Jisung, and they both start walking again. “Jisung, I’m so happy that I met you in high school. You are such a sweet and strong person.” 

Jisung felt so touched by the words and gave Seungmin a big smile. “I’m happy to have met you as well. To me, you are beyond smart and wise; you are such a loyal and patient friend. I love that about you so much. I feel like I can say anything to you, and you’d give me a helpful response.”

“You are melting my heart,” Seungmin replies, and then he sighs, “I don’t want to go back yet. I’m enjoying my time alone with you. Let's spend more time together.”

“Hell yeah!” Jisung smiles. 

They end up at the park, lying together on the grass; the cold air coats them, but Jisung could care less; he feels so calm underneath the stars and enjoys having Seungmin beside him. He turns his head to him, and Seungmin curiously does the same as well, a smile creeping on his mouth. 

“Aren’t the stars so beautiful?” Seungmin looks back at the pretty night sky again. “I could stare at them all night.”

Jisung gazes at the stars; in an instant, the memory of last week hits him, along with the guilt. The guilt made him feel so sick in the stomach again. Daekhwa died all because of him. Tears slipped out of his eyes.

“Sungie, what’s wrong?” Seungmin asks. 

“I need your honest opinion,” Jisung says; Seungmin rolls to his side, now facing Jisung, and hums for him to continue. “Do you think Daekhwa deserved the death penalty?” 

Seungmin’s eyebrow knits together at that sudden question. “I think he did.” Jisung turns his head away from Seungmin and closes his eyes. “I’m sorry, Jisung, but he did so many bad things to you, Minho, and even the others. He almost killed Jeongin. He definitely deserved it.”

Jisung thinks he should let the guilt he feels for Daekhwa’s death go. Seungmin is right; he did do many bad things that ruined other people's lives. All because of Daekhwa, Minho doesn’t feel secure with dating Jisung and can’t trust himself. Daekhwa destroyed Jisung by kidnapping him and tormenting him. The thought of what he did makes Jisung feel so sick again. 

Jisung rolls his body to Seungmin. “I haven’t told anyone this yet, but I feel that I am ready to tell you. He did one more thing that damaged me.” Seungmin stays silent, and Jisung continues, “Do you promise to keep this a secret between us? I don’t want anyone else knowing about this yet.”

“I promise Jisung.” 

“Daekhwa-'' Jisung bites onto his bottom lip to prevent himself from crying; however, the copious amount of tears that leak out of his eyes tarnishes his efforts. “He...he raped me.” 

Seungmin immediately sits up, his eyes wide and filling with tears. “I’m so sorry.” 

Jisung sits up too and pulls his knees close to his chest. “Maybe you’re right. He drugged me, raped me, hurt me, and made me feel so horrible. He is a monster, but I feel like a monster too. He died because of me, because of what he did to me. I just feel so horrible about him being dead now.” 

Seungmin doesn’t reply as he is sobbing uncontrollably. Jisung waits for the younger to stop crying, and when he does, he settles his eyes onto Jisung’s. “I understand your guilt, but his death wasn’t your choice. It was a choice determined by the laws and the judge. He did so many horrible things. I think death was the best possible decision.”

Jisung nods to those words. “I think it’s time for me to start accepting his death. I don’t want to say that he deserved it, but he did so many cruel things. Now we are all free. Well, maybe all of us except me. I feel like I am suffocating so much; Minho remains in my heart. I think it's also time to pull him out of my heart. It's time to take slow steps to recovery."

Seungmin throws his arms around Jisung, hugging him tightly, and cries onto his shoulder. “I’m so sorry, Jisung, I’m sorry. I won’t tell anyone about our talk, this all only between us. Thank you for opening up to me; I'm so, so,  _ so _ proud of you.”

“I felt comfortable with telling you because I trust you, and you are so patient and understanding. If I told Hyunjin, he would’ve been so pissed off and probably would find Daekhwa in hell or something,” Jisung says and laughs genuinely. 

Seungmin pulls away, wipes away his tears, and chuckles. “Yeah, sometimes he tends to over-” he gets cut off by his phone ringing and takes his phone out of his pocket. “Well, speaking of Hyunjin.” He shows Jisung his phone screen with Hyunjin’s name on it, making Jisung breathe out a single laugh. 

“Hello?” Seungmin answers. 

_ “Where are you two? You’ve been gone for two hours! Getting medicine from the drugstore doesn’t even take that long!” _ Jisung could hear Hyunjin shout. 

“Jisung and I are hanging out at the park, but we will come back now. It’s freezing out,” Seungmin replies. 

“Yeah, you two better!”

“See you at home,” Seungmin replies, hangs up, and lifts himself from the grass. “Let’s go?” Jisung nods up at him and stands up. “Our fun night came to an end, sadly.”

“Pft.” Jisung laughs and playfully hits Seungmin on the back. “Don’t make me sad.”

“Sorry, not sorry,” Seungmin replies, earning himself another playful smack. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed reading this chapter! 
> 
> Sorry for any grammar mistakes for this one, I quickly read through it because I desperately wanted to publish the chapter today hahah (might fix it later if I don't feel lazy :') ) 
> 
> One question; should I make the next chapter about how Minho is adjusting or continue with Jisung and make the chapter after that about Minho?


	37. Bottles and Battles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Mention of suicide

One, two, three… he mourns to a random number he finds in his contacts. Four, five… the fluids make him feel so good and free. It numbs the pain in his heart, making him forget about his love. Six, seven… it’s way too many bottles, but who cares? He feels super good; he feels happy; his soul dances joyfully up in the clouds.

“Fuck it,” he slurs at a random middle-aged man sitting next to him on the barstool, “Fuck it all, who needs love when it only brings pain, right? I ran away, and it’s the best thing I’ve ever done. I don’t need anyone in my life, and I am all fine alone. I am single and the happiest I can be.” 

_ “You little shit!” _ Is someone angry? 

Minho chooses to ignore those words; it’s probably not even directed towards him. But why does the voice sound so familiar? Is it Chan? No way. How would he find him here? 

Minho’s full attention is on the bartender now. “One more, please~” Hands grip his arm and pull him forcefully off the stool. He lazily spins to the person, and when he sees that it is only Seonghwa, he sends him a grin. “Why hello there. I didn’t expect you here. Here to join me for a drink?”

“You didn’t  _ expect _ me here? You  _ called  _ me, you idiot!” Seonghwa scolds, “And I am not here to join you, I came here to check up on you, and now I’m going to take you away, you heart-broken rascal.” 

“Heartbreak?” Minho juts out his bottom lip into a pout. “What heartbreak?” Seonghwa makes a crying-looking face all of a sudden. Is he trying to be funny? He is so silly! Such a silly friend. Minho giggles at the taller male. 

“Stop laughing. I’m taking you home. Let’s go.” Seonghwa tugs Minho, but Minho stays in place.

_ Home? _ Minho pulls out of Seonghwa’s grasp and gestures around this place slackly with his hands. “This is my home.” 

Seonghwa rolls his eyes, grips onto Minho’s forearm again, and begins dragging him away with a lot of effort. “You’re coming no matter what, big baby.”

“No, no, no!” Minho whines and shakes his body like jelly, “Leave me alone! You are taking away my freedom and happiness. I was enjoying myself here! Security! Help me! Anyone! This person is trying to-” Seonghwa slaps his hand onto Minho’s mouth, shutting him up right away. Playfully, Minho gives him a mischievous eye-smile.

Seonghwa glances around; his face looks… what’s the color again? The one that is Jisung’s favorite? No, forget him; he doesn’t need to think about him right now, or else his soul will stop dancing. 

Seonghwa sets his eyes back onto Minho again. “You rascal. No matter how hard you try to resist and embarrass me, I’m getting you out of here.” 

“Nooo!” Minho whines.

_ “Yesss!” _ Seonghwa mocks and, with all his might, drags Minho across the bar. Minho gives up once they are at the front door; Seonghwa isn’t going to leave him alone until he is home. Minho will come back another time and not bring his stupid phone with him. 

Seonghwa pushes Minho into the passenger seat and buckles his belt. Right away, Minho starts feeling a strange feeling in his stomach that travels upwards until it escapes his mouth. 

"Oops, ew."

The door shuts, and Seonghwa wails. “What the heck! Did you drink a hundred! You are going to clean this once you’ve recovered.” 

“Sorry…” Minho blinks at him with sadness and a pout. 

Seonghwa’s expression changes from rage to pity. “It’s fine. I’ll take you to my place and will get you to eat something soft for your stomach to help you feel better.” 

Minho nods then leans his head against the window, feeling as if his soul is leaving his body. 

“Minho… are you feeling alright? Do you have a headache? Do…” Seonghwa’s voice sounds so distant; Minho tries to pay attention to his words, but his body gives up on him. 

\--------

Minho wakes up (not yet opening his eyes) to a self-induced headache. He knows he drank alcohol; he remembers going to a famous bar yesterday after crying in his apartment over the loss he caused himself. Drinking alcohol is something he has been doing for a while now. It’s his way of coping with his blue emotions. 

He slowly opens his eyes, the harsh light stinging his eyes causing his head to hurt much more. His vision adjusts to the bright light quickly, and when he notices that he is in a hospital room, his face drops to a scowl. Did he attempt suicide? There are many possibilities while he was drinking away his emotions.

“Good fucking morning,” someone snarls. Minho’s brows draw close together at the negative-tone, and he turns his head over to Seonghwa - who is seated at the chair by the wall with his arms folded over his chest.

“Good morning to you too,” Minho snorts and turns his face away, avoiding Seonghwa’s burning glare. “You can leave now, I don’t need any of your help.” 

“Oh, really?” Seonghwa questions, his voice higher now, “I think you don’t remember this, but you are the one who called me and cried.”

Minho turns his head over to Seonghwa so quickly that his neck emits a crack. “I did what?!”

“Yeah, you don’t remember.” Seonghwa lets out a sigh of dismay. “Storytime. Yesterday night, you called me, telling me how heartbroken you were and how much you miss your Jisungie. You sounded a little off. You sounded so whiny, and I know your personality well enough to determine that you keep things to yourself. When feeling down, you never tell any of us and just deal with everything alone. And bingo! Like that, I figured out you were drunk. And not drunk at home, you were at a public place because I heard people noise and music. I asked you to make sure, and you told me which bar it was. I came there, found you, then heard your stupid-ass asking for another glass. I tried to pull you away, but you were being so difficult. You even shouted for security! You embarrassed me so much.” Seonghwa takes a deep inhale after his mess of words before continuing. “I managed to take you in my car. You threw up and passed out. Here you are now, at the hospital. Thank god I took you here because there was so much alcohol in your blood.” 

“Wow, sorry for being such a huge burden last night,” Minho mutters. 

“You were pretty out of control, but things happen, it’s fine, but you and I are going to have a big talk once you are discharged from here.”

\--------

“So…” Seonghwa throws his butt onto the couch, and Minho places himself down next to him. “What’s with this whole drinking thing? Why are you drinking so much?”

“I drink to cope. It heals the pain in my heart temporarily,” Minho replies.

“Temporarily?” 

“Yeah.” Minho turns his head to Seonghwa to see how he feels about the words; he looks done. “Okay, okay, I know I am stupid, but I can’t control myself.”

“Yes, I agree, you are very, very stupid. Alcohol isn’t doing you any good, Minho. To me, it seems like you are going through a cycle. You are upset, you drink, then you apparently feel better, and then sad again. What’s the point of even drinking when you are not heading anywhere with it and only running in circles?” Seonghwa rakes back his bangs with his fingers, only for them to slowly fall back in place. “What you are doing to yourself isn’t good. Being away isn’t doing you any good.”

“Then what should I do? Turn back to where I originally was? Because I am not going to face that darkness again.”

“You aren’t even facing the light right now! You are unhappy! Running away from your friends and love isn’t even bringing you peace. If it were, you wouldn’t be drowning yourself with alcohol. Minho, I know you are going to hate to hear this, but you need to get help right away.”

“No, I don’t need-”

“Yes, you do,” Seonghwa sternly concludes, “I want to see you improve.”

Minho sulks and leans back against the cushion, not liking the words. 

\--------

Minho comes out of therapy, slightly satisfied. Therapy, of course, was forced into him, not by Seonghwa but by Minho’s parents. They visited him last week, the same day he was discharged from the hospital. Apparently, they found out about his hospital visit because of Seonghwa. It wasn’t exactly all his fault; without knowing, he took Minho to the hospital that is owned by his Dad. And yeah, the hospital called Minho's Dad, notifying him about the alcohol poisoning, and boy, were his parents upset.

He isn’t allowed to stay alone in his apartment and now stays with his parents. 

He wasn’t very fond of going to therapy, but he had to no matter what. 

After today’s session, Minho found it to be useful to himself. It feels great to vent out his emotions to a caring and friendly professional. Today, he understood himself better and found his wants. The wants that would lead him to the path of healing.

Going back. 

Yeah, facing his so called ‘darkness.’

_ “It seems that running away is causing you so much more pain.” Minho’s new therapist, Jisoo, voices her opinion with a worried expression on her face. After hearing that sentence, Minho finds himself in tears because her words are the bitter truth.  _

_ “I thought it would make me feel happier, but all it did was hurt me so much more.” Minho wipes away the tears that stream down his cheeks. “It didn’t help me breathe because I can’t stop thinking about the past.” _

Running away from the things causing himself pain makes him feel like a coward. He was such an idiot, and turning away from the others is the most idiotic thing he had ever done. For days, he couldn’t breathe peacefully. He couldn’t smile or laugh freely like he expected because even if he isn’t physically back where he originally was, mentally, he is. 

After running away, breathing got so much more challenging because his heart hurt so bad. The main reason for this unbearable heartache is Jisung - yes, Han Jisung, whom Minho himself abandoned, shattering his heart into pieces. 

Day by day, Minho would cry over him because he misses him so much. He craves him, wants to touch him, kiss him, hug him, and spend a lot of time with him. 

_ “Running away helped me in no way at all,” Minho states. Jisoo nods at his words, and at her silence, Minho continues to speak, “Running away from the one I love didn’t make me forget him. It made me miss him so fucking much.”  _

_ “Would you like to tell me more about this person? How much does he mean to you?” _

_ Minho leans back against the comfortable armchair and plays with his fingers as he thinks. “He…” Minho begins to tear up, and he looks down at his hand. “He is my everything.”  _

Through the good and the bad, Jisung was there right by his side, supporting him and showing him his love. No matter how impulsive Minho acted before, and the horrible things he did, Jisung stood right before him with his heart and arms always open - accepting Minho no matter what.

And right now, Jisung waits. His heart and arms open for Minho to slide towards them. 

Minho needs him. 

_ Just know that I will be waiting for you, for however long I have to wait.  _

Minho gets inside his car and begins backing up out of the parking lot. Should he go to Jisung now? Would Jisung want to see him right now? It’s been two months already. In two months, things could’ve changed. Jisung might not feel the same for him anymore, and maybe he is tired of waiting. 

Minho stops his car at a nearby convenience store. 

_ “I feel like I dug myself a hole. I think leaving my friends made them develop a disliking for me.” Minho laughs without any humor in it. “They wouldn’t want to see me. Aren’t I basically a selfish traitor at this point?”  _

_ “You’re questioning it all,” Jisoo replies, “Your thoughts are all your fears. You said that you miss them and said that your former significant other is your everything. I believe you should try to contact them, tell them how you feel. You won’t actually know their true feelings unless you talk to them.”  _

He is overthinking things. He definitely needs to see for himself instead of worrying about things too early. If by any chance, they don’t accept him anymore then it is okay. He still has his other friends that still love him and take care of him well. If Jisung doesn’t love him anymore and finds someone else that loves him, then Minho would ~~cry every day and every night~~ try to feel happy for him.

He steps inside the convenience store, heads to an aisle to get two strawberry milks - Jisung’s favorite - and takes them to the front counter. Together they can drink milk and talk. 

“Well, hello, Minho. The one who got away.” A shiver runs down Minho’s spine at the voice. He sets his gaze onto Jeongin’s face; the younger looks so disappointed. “Long time no see. Is life treating you better since you left it?” Jeongin eyes Minho from his torso and then back up to his face. “You seem to be getting worse.” 

Jeongin doesn’t seem so happy to see him here, and it’s making Minho feel upset. Is everyone else mad at him as well? Nobody wants him anymore. 

“I think I forgot to take care of myself?” Minho awkwardly replies. Jeongin ignores Minho’s statement and begins scanning the two items. He announces the total blandly. 

“You’re forgetting to take care of yourself because you are not happy. I can see your emotions in your eyes. There is so much sadness in there.” Jeongin hands Minho the bag with the strawberry milks inside. “Whatever you planned for yourself failed.”

“Do you think the happiness will sink right back in my eyes once I see Jisung again?” Minho asks with hope. He is so desperate to see Jisung; he wants to hug him, kiss him, and spend hours and hours talking to him about how much he missed him. Would Jisung also be proud that Minho is in therapy again? 

“Uh…you want to see Jisung?” Jeongin says, his eyebrows drew together in what seemed like concern or apprehension. 

“Yeah, you don’t look so happy ab-”

“No, it's not that,” Jeongin immediately cuts Minho off and looks to the right quickly before returning his eyes to Minho, “Let’s go sit at the front table and talk. Break is in a few minutes for me anyway."

“Sure, let me put this in my car real quick,” Minho says, lifting his bag.

When Minho returns, he finds Jeongin seated at the front table with his face propped against his palm. He joins him there. “Not to sound rude, but why are you working at a convenience store here?”

“Couldn’t find myself a place anywhere else. The convenience stores near the university I attend are all occupied by other students.” Jeongin looks out the window and tilts his head up. “I suppose you moved to this district, is that right?” He turns his head to Minho, his face not showing any emotions currently; he looks so soulless, like a lot is going on his mind. Minho nods at him slowly. “A wealthy area for a rich person like you is so suitable.”

Minho finds himself laughing at those words. “Yeah, I live somewhere around here. It’s much more different than where I originally was. The atmosphere here is so busy and pretty wild, not suitable for me. It makes me miss my old area, where it was less busy.”

Jeongin lets out a sigh. “Impulsive actions lead to regrets afterward, don't they?”

“Shut it,” Minho calmly scoffs, “Let’s talk about you now. I’m curious, why are you working here at a convenience store? Don’t you already earn enough money?” 

Jeongin runs his finger through his black hair and then drops his hand onto the table. “I work here to keep myself occupied. It’s still winter break, and it isn’t going well for me because I was super bored. I have no one close to hang out with because everyone returned to their families two weeks ago.” Jeongin gives Minho a sad smile. “I’m the only one who doesn’t have a family to go back to. I feel like the odd one out.” 

Minho’s heart squeezes at his words. After finishing high school, Jeongin’s Dad kicked him out of the house, leaving Jeongin with no other choice but to ask Minho if he could stay over at his place until he can get into the university housing. Minho doesn’t know what happened between Jeongin and his Dad - Jeongin keeps it a secret - but Minho does feel super bad for Jeongin. He’s been through a lot. 

Minho met him in high school, when he was in his second year and when Jeongin was in his first year. It was the first week of school, Jeongin was confused and nervous like the other first year’s. He approached Minho first for directions (because Minho was a part of the student council), and Minho happily helped him out. 

After that, Jeongin approached Minho once again to ask him questions regarding the school's clubs, Minho provided him with some information, and then Jeongin mustered up some courage and asked if Minho could be friends with him, and like that they became friends. 

“May I ask what you did before getting into this part-time job?” Minho asks. 

The younger lets out a long breath and then quickly turns his body away. Minho knows this action all too well; it means that Jeongin is going to cry. He hears sniffles sound from the younger, and hesitantly, Minho places a hand on his back. 

“It’s okay, you don’t have to tell me anything if you don’t want to,” Minho states in an assuring tone.

Jeongin nods at him, and for the next few minutes, he tries to calm himself down. He wipes his tears away before turning to face Minho. “Do you think Hyunjin will turn away from me once he finds out about what I do? I’m so scared about this, but as his boyfriend, I feel like I need to open myself up to him.”

Minho places his pointer finger against his lips. “Hmm, I don’t think Hyunjin would turn away from you. He doesn’t have that much of a nasty personality at all. His heart is so soft and big, and he takes care of others and considers others' emotions. Hyunjin cares about you a lot too. He gave you another chance, he trusts you, and he isn’t the type of person that would leave you over something personal to you. I think if you open up to him, he would understand, and I believe he will love you the same.” 

Jeongin gives Minho a quick smile, and then it drops. “Thank you for your words. It’s encouraging me to open up to him, but I don’t think I am ready to do that yet. I need to think about it a lot.”

“That’s okay,” Minho replies reassuringly, “So…about Jisung...how is he doing so far?”

That same look from earlier flashed onto Jeongin's face. “Jisung wasn’t doing okay at all when you broke his heart and left him. He worried everyone else. He wouldn’t often smile, nor would he eat properly. That lasted for days, and now he is so much happier, he is starting to heal.” 

Minho's heart begins to ache again. Something in him tells him that showing himself to Jisung isn’t a great idea. If Jisung is doing better now, would his happiness disappear if he sees Minho?

“Is he doing better without me?” Minho asks.

Jeongin starts looking so guilty for some reason, and he shifts his eyes from Minho’s face. This is giving Minho a bad feeling. “In a way, yeah…” tears fill up Minho’s eyes; he doesn’t like this answer so far, “he is doing better with someone else.”

And like that, Minho’s heart falls out of his chest and breaks into so many tiny pieces once it hits the floor. “Is he in a-”

“Yeah, Jisung is dating someone.” 

Minho’s throat starts closing up, and his hands begin to shake. He opens his mouth to say something but closes it right away. He is in so much pain.

Jeongin starts looking extremely worried. “Minho, I’m so-”

“I-It’s fine- really. It’s all my fault.” Minho gets out of the stool and quickly leaves the convenience store, never planning on coming back here. He no longer wants to show his face to anyone he knows. Like an idiot, he wants to run away.

Minho throws himself down at the driver's seat and presses his forehead against the steering wheel. “I… I thought you would wait for me…” but Jisung took Minho’s words:

_ I want you to be happy and live on well without me. Heck, even find someone better than me. _

Jisung is happy and found someone better. 

Minho isn't his 'better' anymore. 

_ Stupid, stupid, stupid! _ Minho grips onto his hair and cries hard. 

\--------

_ "All of my beliefs were correct," Minho whimpers pathetically to Jisoo, "He doesn't love me anymore; he is dating someone else now. It is my fault, anyway. I abandoned him! I'm so stupid." Minho softly hits himself in the forehead a few times. "What do I do? What do I do?" _

_ "Do you think he was unhappy with you?"  _

_ Minho looks at her. "I'm sure he was happy with me. We loved each other so much, but I guess his feelings might've slowly changed right after I left him. Someone new entered his life. Someone that can make him happy. I'm not good enough." Minho presses his face into his hands and cries hard.  _

If Jisung moved on, then Minho must stop dwelling in pain and let go of the flower. Jisung isn’t for himself anymore. 

It’ll all be okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, how do you feel? :')


	38. Healed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I've stated that this chapter is going to be a time-skip ahead to a year, but I changed my mind because I remembered that I needed to write Jisung's pov, and I can't move ahead without finalizing a lot of things. The next chapter, however, will take place a year ahead and will be pretty painful. 
> 
> I hope you enjoy this quick chapter!

Jisung arrives at the nearby Café alone, places his order, and chooses to sit near the back because he finds it comforting to himself. He came here to this peaceful environment with pleasant background music to write a new song for the upcoming album. 

The theme of the song he works on right now is a love song. Due to recent painful events, so many ideas fill his mind, and he needs them in his lyric notebook right away before he ends up forgetting. 

This song he is writing is about Minho, of course. He should forget him; that’s what he wanted to do but forgetting him is complicated. Minho is the blessing of his life; he means so much to him. He loves him the same and still misses him a lot. Since it’s been a while without Minho, there isn’t any pain inside of Jisung now.

_ Okay _ , maybe ‘any’ isn’t the correct word for it. He does feel some pain, but it isn’t as strong, and he doesn’t cry a lot. The pain comes and goes like the wind. Little by little, he pulls the thorn out to make himself feel better. Chan’s advice is working wonders. 

Jisung reminds himself not to let a person ruin his well being. Jisung wants to be happy not only for the sake of his friends but also for himself. He needs no more sadness in his life.

But of course, he isn’t 100% happy. There is some gloom laying within him, the gloom that Minho would never ever come back and that Jisung may have to end up moving on. 

His order number gets called; he pauses his writing and goes to the front to get his hot chocolate. When he walks back, in his path comes a rushing boy. Before he could even step away, he crashes into him - it wasn’t a major crash, Jisung is safe, but his hot chocolate? Nope. It settled onto the boy’s beige colored coat. 

“I’m sorry for ruining your-”

“No, no, I’m the one who should be sorry. I shouldn’t have run. I’m a big idiot,” he apologizes and bows several times. “You can order another drink, and I’ll pay. I am so sorry about this.” 

“There is no need to,” Jisung responds and looks inside his cup. 50% of the hot chocolate soaked the boy’s coat, and the other 50% remains in his cup. “I still have plenty.”

“No, I must,” he says and starts walking to the front counter. Jisung had no other choice but to accept his offer because the boy looked very upset and ashamed when he shouldn't even be. Jisung isn’t the type of customer that would explode over other people’s accidents. “Go ahead and place your order.”

Jisung gets a new order of hot chocolate and returns to his seat along with the boy, who places himself across from Jisung. He looks at Jisung’s notebook and then lifts his gaze to Jisung’s face. “I’ll stay here until the next bus arrives. Which will be in about thirty minutes, I shouldn’t wait out in the winter air.” He talks so politely, and so far, he seems like a sweet person. “My name is Yeosang. May I have your name?” 

“Ah, my name is Jisung,” Jisung responds, “Are you a college student?” 

“Yeah!” Yeosang brightly replies, “I’m majoring in nursing, how about you?”

“Music production.” Jisung smiles happily at him. 

Yeosang looks at Jisung’s notebook again - realization washing onto his face - and then back at Jisung. “Is what you’re writing a song?” 

“Yeah,” Jisung replies. He was going to state that he is an idol, but he quickly chooses not to because it is something he doesn’t want to reveal to him yet. It would be best if he finds out on his own. 

“That is cool. Is it okay if I can see what you wrote?” 

“I haven't written a lot down yet, but okay.” Jisung slides over his notebook to him. 

When he finishes reading the very few lines, he slides back the notebook to him, an astonished expression is on his face. “I’m impressed. You write lyrics so beautifully and meaningfully. I love it!”

Jisung feels so much joy gather inside of himself, and he gives him a big smile of appreciation. “You really think so?” Yeosang cutely nods to him. “Thank you so much! I’m so happy you think the lyrics are nice.”

Originally Jisung solely came here to write lyrics, but he guesses he isn’t able to get that done because all of his focus is on Yeosang because he likes him a lot. He talks so politely, his smile is the prettiest like his face, and he has such a soft and great personality. And his laugh… goodness, it makes Jisung smile because it is so gentle and light like a feather. 

When Yeosang’s bus arrived, Jisung was pretty upset because he wanted to talk to him some more. Thankfully, before leaving the Café, Yeosang gives Jisung his number so they can talk more. 

\--------

“Who is making Jisungie smile so big?” Hyunjin joins Jisung on the couch and takes a peek at his phone. Jisung doesn’t move his phone out of Hyunjin’s view and quickly responds to Yeosang’s text with a giggle. “Ooh, I see someone is in love~” Hyunjin teasingly continues. 

“I’m not in love!” Jisung snaps, his face burning up. “I just met someone nice at the Café.” 

“Well, you seem to like this person a lot. You look like you are in love.” Jisung shoots Hyunjin a glare and then returns his focus onto his phone again. Hyunjin continues to speak when Jisung doesn’t respond to his words. “Please do tell me how you two met. I'm so interested.” 

Jisung tells him the full story, and when he finishes, he looks at Hyunjin again, only to see the taller boy giving him a big grin. “You are totally into him. You had sparkles in your eyes as you spoke about him, and you even had on a big smile.” 

“I mean… he is pretty appealing and sweet. He made me so happy,” Jisung says with an awkward laugh.

"Oooh, you should ask him out."

“I don’t want to. My heart is waiting and is staying loyal.” He still wants to wait for Minho. 

“For Minho?” Hyunjin asks, disappointment in his tone. Jisung nods as a reply. “Are you sure you want to wait so long for Minho? What if he never shows up in your life? If he truly loved you, he wouldn’t have lasted a day without you and would’ve come back to you at this point.” Hyunjin places his hands on Jisung’s shoulders. “You have a new face in your life, and you look like you love him a lot.” 

Well, Hyunjin is right. What if Minho never shows up again? If Minho actually did love him, he’d definitely be by his side. Should Jisung pull out the rest of the thorn, throw it away and move on? Maybe he should.

“Okay, I’ll ask him out,” Jisung says, making Hyunjin let out a happy gasp.

Jisung [10:01 PM]: Would you like to go out with me? Even though it’s early, I want to tell you that I like you a lot. You truly captivated me with your personality. 

It was an awkward confession, but he hoped it was good enough. 

Yeosang [10:02 PM]: Yes! I like you a lot too! Where and when should we meet?

Jisung smiles happily and looks at Hyunjin. “He said, yes!” 

Hyunjin widens his eyes and then lets out a happy squall. “I’m so happy for you!” 

\--------

Felix sighs and leans against the doorframe to Seungmin’s and Hyunjin’s shared room. He wants to talk to Seungmin but, for some reason, is a little too hesitant about it. It’s been a while since he last properly spoke to him. Honestly, Seungmin deserves words from him after being painfully ignored for several days. Felix ignored Seungmin over a stupid reason - his own emotions.

Ever since the day he woke up from his short comma, he had this special feeling for Seungmin inside him. He thought it was love. For a long time, he kept the feelings inside, keeping it his own secret. When Seungmin confessed to Chan while packing their belongings to move out of the dorms, Felix felt crushed and decided to distance himself from Seungmin to cover up his emotions. 

However, Felix started spending more time with Changbin, and that's when he realized he felt two completely different things. Around Seungmin, Felix felt warm and happy, like how a teddy bear makes him feel. He likes being around Seungmin because the other lightens him up. On the other hand, around Changbin, Felix’s chest feels heavy, and his heart beats fast. Even if things slipped a little between the two, they managed to pick themselves up again after an open relationship that they decided to close. With Changbin, Felix feels joyful, special and he loves to be with him. He wants to be with him at all times, especially in his strong arms. 

Now here Felix is, at Seungmin’s door, wanting to explain this story to him, he knows it is going to be confusing for the other to take in, but if Seungmin takes in his academics so well and easily, then  _ hopefully _ he may take Felix’s words just as easily. 

Felix was planning on telling Jisung about it first, but the other has been out on a date with his new boyfriend since morning. Jisung brought Yeosang to this apartment to introduce him, Hyunjin and Seungmin were so happy, but Felix wasn’t (but he didn’t show that and forced a smile.) Yeosang has such a soft and sweet personality and is extremely handsome. But Felix doesn’t like their relationship. In his opinion, Minho and Jisung’s relationship was so much better; the two literally loved each other to death. 

Something about Jisung’s new relationship feels forced. 

The door opens - popping Felix out of his messy thoughts - and out of the room steps Hyunjin. “What are you standing here for?” Hyunjin asks as he closes the door. 

“I was planning on talking to Seungmin. I guess I’ll head in now.” Felix sighs. “Time to get this over with.” 

“Alright, I’ll be making ramen. Want some too?” Hyunjin asks. Felix gives him a quick nod and slowly opens the door, and takes a peek inside. He finds Seungmin on the queen-sized bed, laying on his belly watching something on Hyunjin’s laptop. 

Seungmin lifts his gaze from the screen when he notices Felix. “Hey… did you need something?” 

Felix walks over to the bed and sits at the space next to Seungmin. It is warm, probably because Hyunjin occupied this spot. Seungmin shifts and sits upright. He gives Felix a questioning look, forcing Felix to have no other choice but to finally explain himself. “I’m sorry for ignoring you for a while. I was ignoring you over my own feelings ever since you and Chan started dating. I wanted to distance myself from you.”

“Were you jealous of our relationship or something?” Seungmin asks.

“I’m not sure… I was just upset?” Felix responds, shifting his eyes away from Seungmin’s unamused expression. “It was confusing for me too... but! I have my mess figured out!” Felix sets his eyes back at the other. “Deciding to spend more time with Changbin helped me figure out my emotions. I thought the warmness I felt around you was love, but it actually wasn’t. One time, I tried to imagine myself kissing you, and ugh, that’s a big no-no.” Felix pulls on a playful, grossed out face, causing Seungmin to smile. “My heart doesn’t beat quickly when I’m around you, but around Changbin, it does. I love Changbin and can always see myself kissing him. What I felt around you was platonic love, I think, or at least what it said when I searched up my questionings on google.” 

“Ahh,” Seungmin responds, and then his lips drop into a frown again, “You ignoring me hurt my feelings so much.” 

Felix felt so ashamed of himself for being such a jerk. “I’m sorry…”

“Hey, it’s all good now.” Seungmin places a hand on Felix’s shoulder. “Thank you for finally talking to me.” 

Felix pulls on a smile and wraps his arms around Seungmin. “I’m glad to be your friend.”

“Same here,” Seungmin says, “But you owe me for upsetting me.”

“Huh?” Felix pulls away. “What do I owe you?”

“Bake me chocolate chip cookies,” Seungmin says with a laugh.

“Okay.” Felix smiles softly. 

\--------

The winter break nears its end. Hyunjin and his friends returned to their own places, getting ready for the spring semester, and enjoying their last moments of freedom. Hyunjin wants to enjoy some time with Jeongin, so that's why he is here at Jeongin’s apartment door with a bag of food in hand. It’s a Friday today, and he wants to eat, hang out and spend this night with Jeongin. He enters the code - Hyunjin doesn’t even have to knock because he knows he is welcome here anytime - and steps into the small but cozy apartment. He heads straight to the kitchen to set the bag of warm food on the kitchen countertop. Then he looks around for Jeongin. He isn’t hanging out in his living room, so he must either be in his room or outside somewhere.

He will check first to make sure. So he heads over to Jeongin’s room, and right when he touches the knob, he hears a soft whine sound from inside. It brings chills down Hyunjin's spine, but he tries not to jump to conclusions; it can mean anything. But that doesn’t mean he will walk away yet and wait for Jeongin to come out of his room. Hyunijn will stick to where he is and hear some more before coming to a proper conclusion. 

Another sound comes out of Jeongin, this time a moan. Hyunjin’s heart begins to crack up. Is there someone else in there with him? Are they having sex?

To answer his curiosities, he opens the door a little bit and takes a peek inside. There he finds Jeongin sitting on the bed, wearing a baggy white button-up. The top couple of buttons are undone, and the fabric is off Jeongin’s left shoulder, exposing his pale skin. Jeongin immediately takes notice of Hyunjin in complete horror. Hyunjin takes notice of the laptop in front of Jeongin. “Sorry, I’ll be right back,” Jeongin tells the laptop. He is streaming himself? Hyunjin doesn’t know what to feel at the moment, but this is definitely a shock to him. He didn’t think Jeongin is the type to do these things. 

Hyunjin opens the door wide enough to step inside as Jeongin steps towards him, Hyunjin notices that he has nothing on else besides that shirt, and it barely reaches the middle of his thighs. 

“I’m sorry, I… I… was planning on telling you… but now you know…” Jeongin whispers, tears of what seemed like embarrassment pours down his cheeks. 

“Don’t keep your viewers waiting,” Hyunjin whispers his response, “Continue with what you were doing, I’ll be waiting for you in the living room. I brought food as well, so if you can, please hurry. I don’t want the food getting cold.”

Hyunjin immediately leaves the room and places himself down on the couch. He turns on the tv to watch something to distract himself, but that doesn’t work. As a drama plays right before him, he chews on his thumbnail as he is lost in his thoughts. 

When did Jeongin start doing this whole porn streaming, and why? Could it be that he was lonely for the past month while Hyunjin spent time with his family? What Jeongin is doing isn’t sitting quite well on Hyunjin, but Hyunjin isn’t going to be mad at him for it. He needs to know the reasons why.

Eventually, Jeongin comes out of his room, wearing a white shirt and black jeans. Hyunjin quietly gets up from the couch, heads into the kitchen to grab the bag of food, and returns. He sits down at pats at the spot next to him. Jeongin sighs with remorse and places himself down, inches away from Hyunjin. He looks the same as earlier - upset and embarrassed. Hyunjin wonders how he should assure him. 

“Let’s eat first and then talk,” Hyunjin says with a soft tone to make Jeongin feel comfortable. Jeongin quietly nods, still not looking okay. 

They eat in complete silence, a silence Hyunjin didn’t like. Once they finish, they clean up and return to the couch. Jeongin doesn’t look at Hyunjin and keeps his eyes down onto the couch. 

“Jeongin, please don’t be like this. I’m not angry right now. I just need some explanations because what you did was so surprising to me. I didn’t expect that of you.”

Tears stream out of Jeongin’s eyes again. “I… I started this last summer. I needed money to cover my expenses; there was no other choice for me. I wanted to do something that wouldn’t take up too much of my time because I need a lot of time to study for my difficult major. That’s why I chose to stream myself, it helped me earn a lot of money, and it doesn’t even take up a lot of my time. It was the only best option. I recently actually worked at a convenience store to keep myself occupied because I was lonely without you around, but I ended up quitting because it got so boring and the manager was so mean to me.”

Hyunjin feels his heart hurting for Jeongin. He wished he asked Jeongin to come along with him. Ultimately, he would need to introduce Jeongin to his family anyway. Hyunjin scoots toward Jeongin and cups his face. “I’m so sorry for leaving you behind; I’m such a bad boyfriend.”

Jeongin sniffles, and Hyunjin wipes away his flowing tears with his thumbs. “Y-You’re not a bad boyfriend.”

“I feel that I am.” Hyunjin sighs. “How come you are struggling with finances? Are your parents not helping you pay for your tuition?”

Jeongin finally meets Hyunjin's eyes, the amount of tears flooding in them hurts Hyunjin so much. “M-My parents are the problem. This was something I was going to open to you about. My life went downhill once I started middle school. My Dad neglected my Mom and me; he would never really be home. It was only until high school when we found out why he was like that-” Jeongin hiccups, and Hyunjin grabs both of his hands and gives them a squeeze, his own tears begin filling up in his eyes. “He cheated on Mom. My Mom was so hurt and killed herself.” 

“I’m so sorry this happened to you, Jeongin,” Hyunjin responds. 

Jeongin continues to speak, “My Dad is so cruel. A few weeks after my Mom’s funeral took place, he ended up marrying the woman he cheated on my Mom with. She was so horrible, along with her daughter. They both hurt me a lot, and my Dad teamed up with them and humiliated me. It went on until they finally kicked me out of home right after graduation, which they didn’t show up to. I had no other choice but to ask Minho if I could stay over with him.” 

“I’m sorry, Jeongin, I’m so sorry…” Hyunjin sobs. Jeongin wraps his arms around Hyunjin’s body and pulls him in a hug. “What happened to you was so horrible, but I’m glad you are away from those shitty people.” 

“I’m glad I am too, sometimes I get sad at the thought of not having a family, especially a loving family to go to,” Jeongin replies. 

Hyunjin pulls away from Jeongin’s body and cups Jeongin’s face. “I don’t know what to say to comfort you. But I will tell you this. You have me. I love you, Jeongin, I love you with all my heart and always will.” 

Jeongin’s bottom lip trembles, more tears leaving his red eyes. “I love you too.” Hyunjin hugs Jeongin tightly and presses a kiss against his neck. 

When they both are calmer, they pull away from each other. “Jeongin, honestly, you doing that streaming thingy isn’t sitting well with me at all. I don’t like you doing it because you are showing yourself to the public. I want you to only show yourself to me.” Jeongin’s face turns bright red from the words. Hyunjin breaths out a single laugh before continuing. “And as for finances, don’t worry about it. Not to brag, but my family is pretty wealthy. And you can move into the apartment. I can kick Seungmin out of the room we share and let you in.”

Jeongin thinks about it before finalizing his decision with a nod. 

Hyunjin smiles and kisses Jeongin’s nose.

\--------

Under the beautiful stars, Jisung and Yeosang sit. Yeosang has his head resting on Jisung’s shoulder while Jisung plays the guitar as he sings one of his songs. It’s been a month since they’ve dated, and it’s going so well. Yeosang is such an amazing person, and Jisung loves him a lot. He is so happy that he and Yeosang bumped into each other at the Café - except for the part when he spilled half of his hot chocolate onto Yeosang’s coat, but Jisung did make sure to buy him a new coat as a gift. 

The thorn is now out of his heart entirely, but it left a scar. Even if the thorn is gone, he will still remember it as it left traces. 

“You sing so beautifully,” Yeosang comments once Jisung finishes singing. Yeosang lifts his head from Jisung's shoulder to stare at his face. “Your voice is soothing. I could listen to it all day if I could.” 

Jisung places his guitar aside and wraps his arm around Yeosang. “I should send you a recording of me singing so you can listen to it all day.”

“That would be great. I want to hear your beautiful voice a lot, especially right before I fall asleep.” Yeosang smiles and quickly presses a kiss against Jisung’s cheek. “Oh, and one more thing.” Jisung looks him in the eyes curiously, and Yeosang offers him a soft smile. “You shine so brightly on stage.”  _ He found out! _ Jisung widens his eyes a little in surprise, and Yeosang pokes Jisung’s cheek. “Don’t worry, Sungie, I am not going to tell anyone.” 

Jisung flashes him a big smile. “You are such a sweet person. I know I said that so many times already, and you are probably tired of it, but I just wanted to say it because you are.” 

“I’m not tired of it and will never be. I like it when you compliment me because it lifts my mood. You always make me feel so special,” Yeosang replies and then moves onto Jisung's lap. He grabs Jisung's chin and tilts his head up; Jisung's could feel his cheeks begin to burn up. "Can I kiss you?" Jisung quickly nods; at this rate, his face might be as red as a tomato. Can Yeosang see it? 

Yeosang gives him a shy smile before gently pressing his lips against Jisung's. Jisung wraps his arms around Yeosangs body, pulling him a bit closer. At first, the kiss they share is so light and pure, but then it intensifies, and they kiss so aggressively. 

They pull away, completely out of breath from the intense session, and they stare into each other's eyes. "You are so beautiful," Jisung comments. 

Yeosang laughs shyly. "You are so beautiful as well." 

Jisung's stomach growls, and he averts his gaze from Yeosang's face in embarrassment, and Yeosang giggles. "I think we should get something to eat. My stomach is pleading for food." 

"Yeah, let's eat tofu stew," Yeosang responds cheerfully and stands up. He stretches out his hand for Jisung, and Jisung takes it, letting Yeosang lift him from the grass. 

"A perfect choice," Jisung states and pulls on his hood and slides up his mask to disguise himself from the public. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The ending was quite painful, wasn't it? Jisung found a new special someone :')
> 
> Since classes will start again for me next week, it may take me a little longer to write the next chapter (but I will try to work fast! ^^) next chapter will be a killer because the minsung interactions will be so painful. Also, a certain character's personality changed after a year ^^ Let's see who it will be xD 
> 
> Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this chapter!! And see ya in the next!


	39. Only Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warning: mild smut

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally, this chapter is here! It was so fun to write haha, I hope you enjoy reading!

“Thank you for tonight Channie, you are lovely, sweet, and thoughtful,” Seungmin states with so much sweetness in his tone that it has Chan’s chest heating up and also causing his heart to flutter with abundant amounts of joy. 

“I want to kiss you so badly right now, but it sucks that I am in the middle of driving,” Chan responds, his eyes never leaving the road. Even though it’s been about three years with his license, he is still a pretty cautious driver. 

“Mm, how about you pull over?” Seungmin says, the heavy seductiveness in his voice sends butterflies flying around in Chan’s stomach. Seungmin is seriously tempting him. “Come on, Chan Hyung, satisfy your desires. I’m ready for it.” 

Chan finalizes his decision and pulls over by the sidewalk. He turns off his car, removes his seat belt, and moves over to Seungmin, who now looks so flustered. Chan chuckles at the bashful look on his face - he is so adorable when like this.

Quickly, Chan clashes his lips against Seungmin’s soft ones. For the first couple of seconds, the kiss is sweet as Chan focuses on being gentle, wanting to show all his love for him. However, when Seungmin lets out a soft sound, Chan begins to go harder on him. He swipes his tongue against Seungmin bottom lip, shoves his tongue inside, and licks and groans into his mouth. Seungmin’s hands travel to Chan’s back, and he collects the fabric of Chan’s black t-shirt into his palms. 

Chan pulls away from Seungmin’s lip; their saliva connects them momentarily before breaking off. Seungmin pouts at the loss, and Chan gives him an apologetic smile. He really wants to kiss him longer and make him feel so good, but Chan needs to return to driving right away; he isn’t sure if he can remain parked here by this sidewalk and doesn’t want to get into any potential trouble. 

He places his hand on Seungmin’s thigh and gives it a gentle squeeze; from that contact, Seungmin lets out a soft breath. “We are continuing this-'' Chan slides his hand up and stops to grab Seungmin’s hip, “When we get back to my apartment. Let’s hope Changbin isn’t there.”

“Okay,” Seungmin responds, dismay lacing his voice.

Chan gives him one more quick kiss before planting himself back in his seat to continue driving again. Silence fills in for the next couple of minutes until Seungmin speaks up again, “Chan Hyung, look! We just passed a dance studio! The building is so pretty, you should see for yourself.” Chan glances at the building in the rearview mirror quickly before setting his eyes back on the road again. Seungmin is right; the building is super pretty, and it looks more like a nightclub than a dance studio. Either way, it’s cool. 

“It is so pretty,” Chan chuckles, “Like you.” 

“Like you too.” Seungmin laughs. Chan puts on a big smile. 

The two finally arrive at Chan’s place (shared with Changbin), and sadly, at the wrong time, there is Changbin on the couch eating potato chips. Changbin pulls his attention from the tv and looks at them, giving them a big smile immediately. “Hey!”

“Hi,” Seungmin replies; Chan could hear the small bit of sadness in his voice. In order to get what they both want, they need to somehow lure Changbin out of this place. They can’t do it while he is here. Chan walks over to the couch and places himself down next to Changbin. 

“Want some chips?” Changbin asks; Chan shakes his head and then thinks of a way to get Changbin out of here. “Seungmin, how about you?” Seungmin shakes his head as well and sits down at the space next to Chan. 

Chan finally comes up with a plan.

“Changbin, Felix is making brownies and wants you over there to eat them with him.” Lying isn’t something Chan does, but in this case, it’s important because he is having a crisis, along with Seungmin. 

And the gullible Changbin’s eyes light up, and he flashes a toothy grin. “Brownies? It’s so sweet of him to invite me over!” He gets out of the couch and happily dashes towards the direction of his room, and once his door shuts, Chan pulls out his phone to quickly text Felix about it. 

Chan [9:23 PM]: Hey, Felix, can you make brownies for Changbin. I lied to him about you making brownies for him, and now he is getting ready to come over to your place. I’m so sorry for this inconvenience. Seungmin and I need our private time, and we need to get him to leave without raising some suspicion. 

Felix [9:25 PM]: Okay, I’ll get right on it lol

Chan lets out a soft laugh at the response. He is thankful that Felix didn’t question it; Chan owes him big time for this. 

Changbin comes out of his room comfortably and casually dressed. He smiles at them before heading out of the apartment. When the door shuts, Chan gets up, pulls Seungmin up to stand as well, and once he does, Chan immediately scoops him up bridal style and presses a quick kiss against his lips. “You ready?”

“Yes, I want you so bad,” Seungmin murmurs; Chan catches the darkness in Seungmin’s lust filled-eyes and smiles at him. 

He takes him to his room, places him down on the bed gently, climbs onto the bed, and hovers over Seungmin. The younger places his hands on Chan’s waist, and Chan presses a kiss against his lips. He moves down to his neck, kisses, and nips at the pale skin, causing the younger to tremble and let out a light pant. 

"I'm going to make you feel  _ so _ good," Chan mutters against his skin. 

\--------

Chan’s eyes flutter open, and he frowns when he doesn’t see Seungmin next to him. He must already be up. Chan gets out of his warm bed, leaves his room, and due to the pleasant smell, he ambles straight to the kitchen instead of going to the bathroom. He’d usually go to the bathroom first and then do whatever he plans on doing next, but right now, his stomach is begging for food.

The younger is in the kitchen cooking something for breakfast. He steps up to Seungmin, wraps his arms around him from behind, and rests his chin against his shoulder. “Good morning, love. Are you able to walk? Does it hurt?” 

Seungmin snorts at those questions. “Chan Hyung, I’m fine.”

“That’s good to hear.” Chan smiles and removes his arms from Seungmin and steps back a little. “Do you need any help with the cooking?” 

“No, I’m almost done.” Seungmin places the wood cooking spoon down, spins around to face Chan, places his hands on Chan’s waist, and pecks his lips.

“Good morning,” Changbin’s tired voice sounds. 

“Good morning,” Seungmin and Chan both say together and part from each other. 

Chan and Changbin sit across from each other at the dining table, and Seungmin first sets the bowls of soup in front of them and then places the side dishes down onto the table before sitting down at the chair right next to Chan. 

“How were the brownies,” Chan asks; Seungmin snickers at the question.

“The best thing I ever had,” Changbin replies, “All made with Felix’s love.” 

They finish eating, Changbin offers to do the dishes, and Chan goes to his room to get his laptop. He wants to research more about this studio Seungmin spotted last night. 

He comes out to the living room, sits down on the couch, which is so much more comfortable than his desk chair, and opens up his laptop. Seungmin plops down next to Chan and curiously watches the laptop screen.

Chan looks at Seungmin. “Do you remember what the name of the dance studio was?” 

“Hmm, I think it was called Lee Know Dance Studio,” Seungmin responds. 

Chan types in the studio's name into the search bar, and once he presses enter, the results show up. He chooses the first result, the direct website of the dance studio. He arrives at the page and raises his eyebrows in surprise when he sees how appealing the page is, resembling the dance studio's colors. This place must be so popular. 

He scrolls down the main section, so far, the contents in this section are pictures, and one picture makes him freeze up. What the hell…? He focuses on the person upfront, the choreographer has a serious expression on his face, and he looks exactly like Minho. Is it Minho?

“Minho…?” Seungmin inquiries as well.

“I’m confused too,” Chan responds. 

“To me, it is obvious that it could be Minho. He just looked a bit thinner and got even more handsome,” Changbin says from behind them on the couch, “Check the choreographers' section. It might show his profile if he actually works in this place.” 

Chan nods and clicks on the choreographers' tab, and it immediately sends him to the page with the choreographers' profiles. The first on the list is ‘Lee Know’ and right underneath that name is Lee Minho. Okay, there is a high chance that this is Minho. Does he go by ‘Lee Know’ now, or is that just his dance name? Right under his name says ‘founder’ - he established this place? Chan turns his head to look at Seungmin, who looks just as shocked. 

“Minho… owns this place?!” Changbin shrieks, “A year away, and he found success!”

“I know right. And this studio is in Gangnam.” Chan returns his eyes to the screen and scrolls down further. “San… Mingi… Yunho… Ten… Taeyong… basically all his fellow dance friends work there too.” 

Changbin lets out an angry huff. “He abandoned us, but not his dance friends. I feel so offended. He is so cruel.” 

“ I mean, he has been with them a lot while he previously attended the university we currently attend. They have things in common, so maybe he feels closer to them than he does to us?” Chan states even though he feels a bit hurt about it too. He doesn’t feel significant enough to Minho, even after being by his side a lot and helping him when things were tough. 

Changbin joins them on the couch. “You thinking what I’m thinking?” He asks. Chan does not know what he is thinking, but with the sneaky glint in Changbin’s eyes, he could tell that whatever plan Changbin has in mind isn’t quite a good or wise one. Chan sends him his response by shaking his head. 

“We should sign up for a dance class with Minho as our instructor!” Yeah, definitely not a wise plan. So much could go wrong if Minho sees them again. Minho left for a reason; he probably doesn’t want to see them ever again. If he did, he would’ve contacted them by now. Now, he has his dance friends to turn to during his troubles. 

“No,” Chan responds. 

Changbin purses his lips. “But Minho is such a good dancer. We can learn a lot from him.” Since when did Changbin thrive on learning more about dancing? He doesn’t even like dancing that much, and Chan knows he just wants to go there to see and talk to Minho. Honestly, Chan low-key feels the same; he wants to go there and check up on Minho. He misses him so much. But what if Minho doesn’t miss them? What if he gets angry? What if he bans them from the building? There are so many horrible possibilities. 

“Changbin, let’s just leave it. The studio is pretty and all, but what wouldn’t be pretty is the unimpressed look on Minho’s face if he sees us there. And if we bring Jisung along, they will both be hurt all over again. Jisung is so much happier now, and if he sees Minho, his happiness will all disappear. I don’t want that to happen to him.”

“Chan does have a point,” Seungmin finally speaks, “It’s best if you just leave Minho alone and let him live his life.” 

“Ugh, you two are no fun at all, honestly.” Changbin sighs in sadness. “We shouldn’t assume things. I want to see him again. I want to talk to him again, I miss him a lot. And I don’t think Minho would be upset at all. And Jisung wouldn’t be affected either. He changed so much within a year… sadly.” 

“You can go there by yourself since you want to so badly.” Chan laughs.

Changbin juts out his bottom lip and pouts as he glares at Chan. Then he lets out a breath and smiles. “Fine then. And I will bring Jisung with me. He will happily go there with me since it’s a pretty studio.” 

Chan feels himself give up; Changbin is pretty stern with his decision, and convincing him not to go isn’t going to work. “I will go too. I’m afraid something would happen if it is only you two there.” Seungmin lets out a not so happy sigh, and Chan quickly turns his head to Seungmin to give him an apologetic look and then turns his head back to Changbin, who has on a smug smile.

“I can’t wait to be there,” Changbin happily states. 

\--------

In the evening, Chan drives Jisung and Changbin to the dance studio. Jisung sulks as he stares out the window, sad that his Friday got ruined. He wasn’t in the mood to dance today because it’s a Friday - his day to relax or do whatever he wants, like watch movies or eat, or both. But none of those things were his options, and he silently compiled even though he was disappointed with Chan’s orders. It better not take too long, or else he will leave and take the bus to his place. 

When they arrive at the place, the shining mint-colored lights instantly grabs Jisung’s attention. Why does this place look more like a nightclub than a dance studio? Funny but also interesting. 

The three of them get out of the car, and Jisung quickly walks towards the building, eager to see what's inside. If the outside is cool, then it must be cool on the inside. When he enters the building, Jisung lets out a soft gasp. It’s so astonishing! The flooring is of dark grey colored marble; the walls are jet black. This place looks extremely expensive, but Jisung knows he can afford it. 

On the left side, there is a lady with short black hair and bangs seated behind the black reception desk. On her name tag is her name ‘Lisa.’ Chan approaches her, and Changbin and Jisung follow him. 

She smiles at the three of them. “Hello, how may I help you?” 

“Are there any classes with Lee Know available?” 

_ Lee Know? _ Jisung peers at the back of Chan’s head curiously. Does he know that person? Is that why they are here? Did he find them a new dance teacher?

Lisa turns to her monitor and starts clicking away for a few seconds, and then when done, he turns back to them. “No, today he is booked. He does intermediate and-”

“Is that 3RACHA?” Someone shouts. Jisung tenses up, and the three of them swiftly turn around to see a group of people looking right at them with excited looks on their faces. One of the girls from the group steps up to them. “Can we take pictures with you guys?” 

Chan steps up in front of Jisung and Changbin. “Sorry, no pictures.” Their excited expressions drop into sad pouts, the girl apologizes, and then they leave this place. Jisung lets out a sigh of relief. Chan returns to his spot. “Sorry about that, please continue.”

“So, as I was saying, Lee Know does intermediate and advanced classes, and in your case, since you three are idols, I think you may need to book a private class with him. Booking a dance class here is something you can do at your own time. You need to sign up on our website and purchase passes. One pass equals one two hour class.” 

“Ahh, okay, thank you for the help!” Chan replies over happily. 

The three of them head to Chan’s and Changbin’s shared apartment and Jisung finds Seungmin on the couch; he is still here? Jisung rushes to him and throws himself on him. Seungmin lets out a groan but pats Jisung’s back. “Nice to see you too, Sungie,” he says. Not wanting to suffocate him too much, Jisung gets off of him and properly sits down next to him. 

“Okay, let’s start signing up,” Chan says. 

Jisung takes out his phone, searches ‘Lee Know Dance Studio,’ and finds the ‘create an account’ on the top right corner and taps on it. It leads him to create an account page, and he begins to sign up. “Are you two done yet? How many passes should I purchase?”

“Ten should suffice,” Chan states. Jisung taps on the ‘10 passes’ option and makes his purchase. The next step was to choose a class. “So Lee Know, private at 7?” Jisung asks just to make sure he doesn’t want to do anything wrong. 

Chan looks at him a little nervously for some reason before nodding. 

Jisung taps on the ‘classes’ header, which leads him to a page with the name of each choreographer. Lee Know is the first option, and Jisung taps on the name, and it takes him to his page. 

Oh. Hell. No. Lee Know is Minho? No wonder why Chan knew him! Jisung stares intensely at Minho’s face just to make sure it is actually him. Well, there is that tiny mole on his sharp nose, and he looks pretty Minho to Jisung. The only difference from last time is that he looks like he lost some weight.

Jisung smiles. It’s nice to finally see his face again after a year. And he is glad to take a class with him. He can’t wait to see the look on Minho’s face, whether or not it be good; Jisung doesn’t care. 

“Jisung is-”

“You planned this, didn’t you?” Jisung cuts Chan off, “For me?” 

“No, Changbin wanted to come here, don’t kill me,” Chan replies quickly. 

Jisung smirks at Changbin, who looks just as apprehensive as Chan. “We caught the cat.” At first, the two looked confused by the words, but they figured out what he meant within a few seconds. “Thank you for finding the studio. Now I can finally see Minho. I missed him so much.” 

“Actually, Seungmin found the studio first,” Chan points out, and Jisung glances at Seungmin happily. 

“Wait, you are happy to see Minho?” Changbin asks out of curiosity.

“Of course! I haven’t seen him in so long. Don’t I deserve to see him?” Jisung crosses his arms over his chest and leans back against the back cushion. “I can’t wait to see the look on his face when he finally sees me. I hope he misses me just as much as I miss him, if not too bad. I will use up my passes for his classes well. And probably buy even more and see him every day if I can.”

“You are scaring me,” Changbin mutters.

“Jisung, you are so funny.” Chan laughs. 

Jisung drops his enthused expression and turns it into one of utter seriousness. “I wasn’t trying to be funny. I am being serious right now. I can’t wait until playtime.” Jisung lets out a soft laugh; Jisung wants to mess with Minho’s emotions like how Minho did with him. He is going to make him regret leaving. 

“Jisung, you better respect Minho when we get to his class tomorrow,” Chan asserts.

“Oh, I will.” Jisung smiles at Chan. “Don’t worry so much.” 

\--------

Minho is at the Café down the street, eating his sandwich with orange juice; it’s something healthy. It should give him enough energy - he needs the energy, especially after teaching an advanced class twenty minutes ago, and needs to fuel himself up for the private class up next. 

He finishes up the sandwich and then quickly finishes up his juice. He then pulls out his phone and watches a few videos to pass by the remaining thirty minutes. 

He leaves the Café, walks all the way back to the studio, and steps up the stairway to the second floor. He approaches the door to his practice room, unlocks it, and opens it. He is about to step inside, but he stops when he hears a voice. Minho curiously turns his head to the right, and instantly a chill runs down his entire body. 

“Hey, Minho,” Chan states once he is near. Minho looks at Chan, then at Changbin, and then finally at Jisung, the younger is staring at him with a tiny smile on his face. Minho thought his feelings for Jisung were long gone, but that’s not the case anymore. The feelings returned fast, and now his heart hammers against his chest.

Is Jisung still dating? 

Minho rips his eyes from Jisung to look at Chan. “What are the three of you even doing here? Did you know I work here?” It’s not that he isn’t happy to see them here; it’s just awkward seeing them after a year. 

“At first, no, but after seeing a picture of you on your website, yes,” Chan replies and then places his hand on Changbin’s shoulder, “He wanted to come here so badly.”

Minho raises his brows, but deep inside, there is a huge relief; thank god they aren’t mad that he cut ties with them. He is willing to connect himself back to them,  _ especially Jisung _ . “Is that so?” Minho smiles at Changbin. “I like your enthusiasm.” 

Changbin laughs at the words. “Thank you, now can we come inside?”

Minho nods and lets them head inside first before he steps inside. He takes off his hoodie, goes over to his bag, and drops it on top of it. He turns around to look at the other three, who were setting their things down as well. He moves his eyes specifically to Jisung, and he catches him slipping a ring out of his finger and putting it inside his bag. Minho assumes Jisung is doing that to hide his relationship from Minho. 

It cracks Minho’s heart a little to see that Jisung is committed to this person he is dating. He tries not to be too hurt about it. It’s his own fault for leaving anyway. But is there at least a tiny chance he can still get back to Jisung? 

“This place took a long time to construct, didn’t it?” Chan asks as he looks around this practice room from his spot.

“Not really, it only took six months. My Dad found this building, it wasn’t in use, and after my approval, he hired people to do the designs and renovate the interior and exterior. I’m pretty satisfied with the way it turned out.” Minho laughs. “Isn’t it pretty?”

Changbin smiles. “Very pretty.”

“Okay, let's not waste any more time. Since you have two hours with me, I want to see you three dance to one of your songs so I can see how you are doing so far, and then I will critique and teach you. Sounds good?” 

Chan and Changbin nod as a reply, and Jisung just absentmindedly stares at the floor. Minho wants to speak up and drag him out of his thoughts but chooses not to. The music will help with that. 

Chan goes over to the computer, puts on one of their songs through youtube, and quickly jogs back in place. They all start dancing, and immediately Minho begins observing, and already he spots Jisung’s flaw: he is dancing so awkwardly. Is it because he lacks skills, or is it overwhelming for him to be stared at by Minho? Minho hopes it isn’t himself because he wants Jisung to be comfortable around him. 

Minho moves his eyes from Jisung to Chan, who is dancing pretty well. His moves are very smooth, and he isn’t awkward like how Jisung is. Changbin is dancing well as well, but when he notices Minho looking right at him, he gets timid. 

“Changbin, be more confident,” Minho tells him gently. Changbin takes in the words and tries to be more confident.

Minho returns his eyes to Jisung, who is staring right at him. It causes heat to creep at Minho’s cheeks, but he tries not to show how affected he is by Jisung and keeps on his stony expression. Jisung doesn’t move his eyes from Minho as he dances less awkwardly. Minho’s insides are burning up; his heart is quickening its pace - He really does feel the same for Jisung even after a year. 

Minho inhales; he needs to snap out of it; Jisung is dating someone. He doesn’t have a chance with him at all. Jisung probably has no feelings left for Minho, and it’s kind of sad. After a year being away, nothing helped, and now that Jisung is right in front of him dancing, the feelings shoved back into Minho’s cracked heart. The feelings he didn’t want, but it’s too strong to control. 

Minho needs to control his emotions, but how is he supposed to do that when the love of his life is right there? No, no, no! Just focus on his dancing! Minho tries to concentrate on Jisung’s dancing; he is doing better than he did earlier in the song, but his body moves are pretty stiff. Compared to Changbin and Chan, he lacks in flow. 

“Jisung, you need to loosen up,” Minho tells him. Jisung gives Minho a single nod as a reply, but he doesn’t even take in the words and continues to make the same mistake! How irritating. 

The song comes to an end; the three of them are breathing heavily from exhaustion. 

Minho goes over to the computer and closes the tab before returning to his spot in front of them. 

“You three did well, especially since you’ve trained minimally and been an idol for a year. However, you can’t always stick like this and need to seek improvement. Chan, you are doing well, and I like how smooth you are. It makes it pretty satisfying. Changbin, you did great too; the only problem is that you sometimes end up being stiff at certain points. Remember to maintain flow and confidence. Jisung, you need some improvement, you are stiff the majority of the time, and sometimes you are out of sync with Chan and Changbin.”

Chan and Changbin nod at Minho’s words,  _ but Jisung? _ Nah, he just crosses his arms over his chest and glares at Minho. “You are just saying that to me because you are trying to pick on me. I always practice, I always work hard. I don’t get why you are telling me that I am stiff when I am most definitely not.”

“You most definitely are. I’ve been watching you.” Minho isn’t picking on Jisung. First of all, he wouldn’t! He has his heart open for Jisung and wants to be the nicest he can to him. Maybe he shouldn’t at the moment because Jisung is such an ass. What’s with him now? He used to be so much calmer. Now he is just a fucking statue of sass. 

“He is not picking on you.” Chan sighs in slight frustration. “He is giving you advice.” 

Jisung opens his mouth to retaliate but shuts it right away. Thank god. 

Minho begins teaching and critiquing to help them clean up their movements to make themselves appeal more on stage. He tries his best to be thorough with his words so they could take it in easily. And occasionally, he glances at Jisung to see how he is doing so far, and well, he is now trying a little too hard.

“Jisung-” 

“Oh my fucking god, what now?” Jisung groans and slaps his hand onto his sweat-drenched forehead. Minho catches Chan shooting the younger an unhappy glare. 

“Jisung, don’t overdo it, okay? Dancing powerfully makes you look awkward. You need to focus on sharpness and flow. Being great at dancing doesn’t necessarily mean you have to dance hard to show that.” 

“What the hell? What the fuck do you even want me to do?” Jisung spat. His attitude is not only making Minho irritated, but it is hurting him badly. Does Jisung truly not like him that much anymore? “You don’t make any sense _.  _ Our dance instructor is so much better at teaching than you.” Those words pierce further into Minho’s heart. He wants to cry but now’s not a great time. 

Chan lets out a huff, steps over to Jisung, and pushes him with minimal force. “Watch your mouth and treat Minho with respect whether you like it or not. I am not liking how you are acting right now.” 

Jisung rolls his eyes. “Fine.” Then he looks back at Minho. “Sorry.”

The rest of the practice goes on well; the three focused and worked hard to improve themselves. There also were no more hurtful and annoying complaints from Jisung. When practice comes to an end, the three of them head to the wall left of Minho to get their bags. Minho is a little sad that the two hours passed by fast; he liked being with them. Hopefully, they come to his classes again. 

“Minho, by any chance, do you have a new number again?” Chan asks.

Oh right, Minho did change his number a year ago, right after leaving. He feels so bad now. But it seems like the three of them - probably not Jisung - still want to be his friend. He shouldn’t have left these kind-hearted people. 

Minho tells them his number, both Changbin and Chan put him in their contacts. It’s upsetting that Jisung didn’t bother with entering Minho into his contacts, but there is nothing Minho could do about it. He will suffer with his feelings in silence.

Jisung has someone better in his life. They’ve been together for a year likely, and Minho didn’t even last a year with Jisung. But Minho still loves him and still wants Jisung to be his boyfriend. But, Jisung clearly shows he has no feelings for him. 

“See you, Minho!” Changbin smiles at Minho and waves goodbye. The three of them approach the door, but only the two of them head out. Changbin and Chan turn to Jisung, giving him a puzzled glance; Jisung whispers something to them, and they nod. Jisung closes the door and then starts walking to Minho. 

“It’s nine,” Minho states.

Jisung stops in front of Minho, their feet only a few inches away. “Mhm, so what? I just wanted to ask a few things before I leave.” 

Minho swallows dry and gives him a nod. “Ask away.”

Jisung smirks and crosses his arms over his chest; by those actions, Minho could tell that whatever Jisung will say isn’t going to be pleasant enough to hear. “So did you enjoy your year away well?” He briefly glances around the practice room before returning his dark eyes to Minho’s. “You looked like you grabbed some major success.” 

“My year away was pretty tough, and yes, with some work, I did grab success,” Minho responds, “How is your relationship going?”

Jisung laughs. “It’s going pretty well, my boyfriend-” Minho tenses at that word, “Is the sweetest. I love him so much.” It hurts. But Minho could tell that Jisung is rubbing this on his face on purpose, either to make him jealous or upset. He achieved both. 

“That’s nice to hear.”

“It doesn’t look like you are happy about it, though. Are you butthurt? Aw, too bad. Maybe you can find someone better in life too.” Jisung smirks and tilts his head to the side a little. “Having someone new in my life fixed the pain you gave me.”

Minho’s chest begins to feel heavy, and his throat tightens up. “Jisung… you said that you’d wait for me.” 

“And you told me to find someone better. Look, you kept me waiting long enough, and Jisungie-” Jisung pokes his own cheek, “Decided to date someone that makes me happy.” 

Minho grabs Jisung’s hips and turns him to the mirror, and pushes his back against it. There isn’t any uncomfortableness in his eyes or even fondness; it’s just a plane stare. It hurts so bad not to see the love and warmth in it anymore. 

“Jisung, I’ll be blunt about my feelings. I miss you so much, and it is hurting me to hear that you have a new boyfriend that is so much better and treats you well. He makes you happy, and it’s bringing me pain because I couldn’t do the same for you. But I want to do the same for you. I want to make you happy all the time. I know I failed to do that while we were together, but I can change that and try my best. I’m sorry about what I did, and I am sorry for leaving you. I actually was planning on coming back to you one day last year, but I encountered Jeongin at the convenience store, and he told me that you are with someone else, so I turned back and returned home.” Tears are streaming down Minho’s cheeks, but he chooses not to wipe them away. They can land on the floor for all he cares. 

“Oh?” is the only word Jisung replies with. 

So Minho had no other choice but to continue speaking, “I know I sound pathetic to you, but is there any chance I- we can get back together, like how we used to? I still love you.” 

“You want to get back with me? Only after a year, you realize? Minho, I’m not the Jisung you knew. I’ve changed.”

“I know,” Minho whispers. 

Jisung smiles at him, cups Minho’s face with his hands, and wipes away his tears with his thumbs. It’s nice to feel Jisung’s hand against his face even though the younger isn't doing it out of love. “The old me would have forgiven you right away.” Minho wishes Jisung was the Jisung he last knew before leaving him, but it’s now long gone. “However, the current and improved me, isn’t going to forgive you that easily. You didn’t come back to me. I am the one to come back to you, here at this studio. Isn’t that a pity?”

Minho doesn’t respond. He tries to fight back his tears, however they are winning the battle and are continuing to flow freely out of his eyes. Jisung sighs and wipes them away with his thumbs again. “You look so desperate. At first, I wasn’t planning on giving you what you want easily, but because you look like a sad puppy right now, I will think about it. If you really want my love again, you better show that you are worthy of it.”

Gaining Jisung’s love doesn’t sound so easy. He probably doesn’t even have the trust for Minho left inside of him. Minho lowers his head at his beliefs and finds himself beginning to sob, because even though it doesn’t seem easy to get Jisung’s heart back, he still wants it back. 

Jisung drops his hands from Minho’s face and Minho meets with his eyes again only to find amusement within them. “Don’t cry, I thought you were stronger than this. Are you giving up already?”

Minho cleans off his tears from his cheeks with his own hands this time and gives Jisung a much more bold stare. “Bring on the challenge Jisung.” 

Jisung laughs, it’s entirely filled with cockiness. “Alright.” He places his hands on Minho’s chest, and pushes him away a little. “This is going to be so much fun. I can’t wait to see how hard you will work, all for me. Ah, even the competitiveness in your eyes is making me feel so excited.” 

Minho doesn’t know why the tone in Jisung’s voice and those words sparked something in his stomach but it did, and it feels so hot down there. Oh goodness, no, not right now! Especially in front of Jisung! He already feels so embarrassed, his face is beginning to burn up and the fact that Jisung is staring right at him - this time with confusion - isn’t helping.

Jisung lifts his brows and then lowers his gaze down to the spot. Minho quickly turns around only to face the mirror this time, making him feel like a complete idiot. Jisung looks right at the tent on Minho’s pants through the reflection on the mirror and he lets out a laugh. 

From the mirror, Minho could see Jisung stepping up to him from behind and the younger grabs Minho by the hips and turns him around. “Where is your mind roaming? Do I still turn you on? Or is that an excited boner?” Can he stop with these questions? Minho feels so sick from his embarrassment. 

“I can give it to you, just tell me,” Jisung continues to speak and he lowers himself to his knees and places his hands on Minho’s thighs. “Ooh, your thighs feel so nice and they even look nice. You must’ve been dancing a lot to get these. I wonder what they look like without these pants.” Jisung’s touch is agonisingly painful and yes, Minho wants Jisung to do whatever he wants to him, however, it also feels so wrong. 

“J-Jisung, you have a boyfriend? If you do this to me then it’s cheating?” Minho mutters. 

Jisung juts his bottom lip out into a fake-looking pout. “What a pity and my boyfriend wouldn’t even mind.” 

“ _ He wouldn’t? _ ”

Jisung’s lips curl into a smile. “No, don’t worry so much about it.” Jisung presses a kiss against the bulge and Minho holds back his groan. Even if Jisung’s boyfriend supposedly doesn’t mind, this still does feel wrong. If Minho were in Jisung’s boyfriend's place, he’d be so jealous and angry. Is his boyfriend truly okay with- Jisung squeezes Minho’s tent, causing a soft groan to erupt from Minho. At the sound, Jisung giggles. “Liking it?” 

Minho stays silent, not knowing how to respond. He likes it of course, but doesn’t want to admit that. 

Jisung suddenly stands up and Minho looks at him with confusion; did Jisung just play with him? “I shouldn’t keep Chan and Changbin waiting for too long. Bye-Bye!” He turns around and rushes to the door and leaves. 

Minho’s mouth drops open in disbelief. Traitor. 

He lets out a huff and places his hands on his hips. That player shall get what he deserves. Minho isn’t going to waste his energy crawling back to Jisung who is playing hard to get. Minho is going to make Jisung crawl back to him and there are a few cards he can use for that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The battle between Jisung and Minho begins xD Let's see who crawls to who first


	40. Why

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hello, I'm back here quickly with another chapter haha. I enjoyed writing this chapter a lot (even though it's not that long) and I hope you enjoy reading it! :D

The anticipated next week approaches and Minho welcomes Chan and Changbin with a warm and welcoming smile once they arrive in Minho’s dance room. Jisung did show up, but because Minho is petty over what happened last time, he didn’t even acknowledge him. That's what that little asshole gets for playing around with Minho. He literally had to go to the bathroom to finish what Jisung left him off with. 

Minho knows that in order to gain Jisung’s love again, he has to prove that he deserves it, but too bad for Jisung; Minho isn’t even going to try. Jisung played with his emotions that day, and it wasn’t even cool! Minho hates being messed with, especially by Jisung; he does love him a lot; however, Minho wants the truth from him. No playing around! 

Now Jisung needs to be the one to crawl back to Minho; he needs to think about what he actually wants. He has to be the one to realize where his heart belongs. And Minho will help him with that by using some cards.

“So, what are we going to do today?” Chan asks.

Minho puts his water bottle back in his bag and stands up. “First, I want the three of you to dance to any one of your songs again so I can see if you applied the skills from last time. If you guys do great, then we can move on. If not, that’s alright. I will just have to reteach somethings.”

“Okay, it sounds great to me.” Chan smiles at Minho gleefully and then goes over to the computer to put on the song.

Minho looks over at Jisung, who crosses his arms over his chest and puts on a scowl for some reason. He steps up to Minho and stares him coldly in the eyes. “Are you mad at me?”

Minho wants to laugh at his question but doesn’t. He is spiteful towards him, not purely angry, even when Jisung played with his feelings that other day last week. Instead of replying to his question, Minho decides to irritate the younger by turning and stepping away from him. He nears the mirror and adjusts his messy hair a bit, trying his best to keep his attention away from Jisung.

The music begins to play, Chan jogs to the center of the practice room, joining in with Jisung and Changbin, and they start to get into their dance. Minho gazes at Jisung first and notices that he has an upset expression on his face from being ignored. Why is Jisung so concerned over Minho ignoring him? Does he want to be talked to? 

Minho gets out of his thoughts when he falls in too deep; he needs to focus on their dance, not Jisung’s emotions. The three of them so far are doing better than last time; Changbin is showing so much more confidence, Jisung is sad (but at least he isn’t stiff), and Chan is sharp and precise. Minho smiles in joy at their improvement, and Changbin takes notice of the smile and sends Minho a happy, knowing grin. 

The song comes to an end, and Minho claps. “You did so much better than last time! I don’t have to reteach anything. Is there anything in particular you three want to do for the remainder of this class?” 

“Hmm.” Chan chews on his bottom lip in thought. “We are having a comeback soon, and we want to present a cooler dance, better than what we have done previously. Are you able to choreograph our next song?” 

“Yeah, I can. I’m excited to do so. Let me hear the song,” Minho responds.

Chan takes out his phone and plays the new song. The song is extremely good, and because it is so good, a spicy, intense dance performance would blend with it well. Minho yearns for perfection and wants to create magnificent moves that fit this song. To achieve this, it will take him some time. But he plans on getting to work right when he comes home. “Chan, can you send me the song? I want to take some time to come up with the moves. I don’t have any open slots for tomorrow, but we can do it in the morning if you want. The studio is only open from evening to night; however, I can open it up for only you guys since I own this place. Is five okay?”

Jisung releases an angry breath, and Minho gazes at him. “What? Do you have a problem with it?” Minho asks him, unamused with his attitude.

“Yeah, I fucking do! You want us to come here at fucking five? Are you crazy or something? We are sleep-deprived college students and idols! Give us a damn break!” Jisung shouts at him, Minho flinches a bit and looks at Chan, wanting him to do something about it. Chan nods at Minho with understanding and steps to Jisung.

“You want a break? Is waking up early to learn a dance something difficult for you? What is wrong with you nowadays? Instead of pedaling straight ahead, you are pedaling backward and are becoming immature. You need to fix this behavior of yours. I know you are not so fond of Minho-'' Minho's hands start trembling, “-but that doesn’t mean you have to be so rude to him. If you don’t want to wake in the morning, then don’t. Changbin and I will show up and learn.” 

Jisung looks down in guilt. “Alright… fine… I’m sorry…”

“Don’t be sorry to me, be sorry to Minho. You were hurting him so much.”

“Like how he did with me?”

Minho’s heart stops at Jisung’s statement. He could feel his face burn up and tears pool in his eyes. He doesn’t want to cry in front of them; he shouldn’t. However, his tears betray him and leak out of his eyes anyway, making him have no other choice but to run out of the practice room. When he gets out, he rushes down the hall, opens the door to the bathroom and finds the very last stall and locks himself in there, and begins to freely cry. 

“Minho, are you in here?” It’s Changbin. Minho immediately silences himself. 

He hears Changbin’s steps coming near and then spots his feet right at the opening beneath this black stall door. “I know this is you, I saw you coming into this bathroom, and you are the only one here along with me. Can you open the door for me?” Minho doesn’t respond, and after a few seconds of dead silence, Changbin continues, “Okay then, I will talk to you like this then.” Changbin lets out a sigh of stress. “I’m so sorry that Jisung had hurt you. I wish I could help in some way… but I’m not good at comforting others. But I can offer you a hug. So can you come out and let me fulfill my wishes because I want to give you the warmest hug.”

Changbin’s sweet words send some warmth to Minho’s aching chest. He doesn’t hesitate and immediately gets up from his spot on the toilet and opens the door. He lets Changbin wrap his muscular arms around his waist tightly. Minho wraps his own arms around Changbin, the shorter male laughs softly. “Chan is scolding Jisung right now. I hope this news makes you feel better.” 

Minho only responds with an unassured laugh. Chan scolding Jisung isn’t going to change the fact that Jisung doesn’t like Minho anymore because of the pain he had caused the younger. None of this would’ve happened if Minho left.  _ Really _ . If he didn’t, Jisung wouldn’t be with another boy, he wouldn’t be loving anyone else… he would’ve only been loving Minho. 

“Do you feel okay enough to go back to your practice room, or do you need some more time here?” Changbin asks. 

“I think we should go back, I’m wasting so much time,” Minho responds and pulls away from Changbin. 

“Your feelings are more important than the dance practice.”

Minho turns and starts walking towards the bathroom door. “Let’s just go. We can’t keep them waiting.”

“If you say so.”

Minho opens the door to his practice room and lets Changbin inside first before letting himself in. The first thing he chooses to lay his eyes on is Jisung, who looks so guilty and regretful over his words. Jisung meets with Minho’s eyes and then quickly looks away, avoiding Minho’s stare. Chan must have scolded him thoroughly. 

Minho averts his gaze to Chan, who looks done, tired of Jisung’s attitude as well. Minho feels pity for the youngest; he hopes that Chan didn’t scold him too harshly because Jisung is a sensitive person and harsh words usually wound him. 

Chan approaches Minho and places a hand on his shoulder. “Are you feeling better now?” Minho only nods. “You can cancel this class early-”

“No, let’s continue,” Minho cuts Chan off and walks over to the mirror and stares at his own reflection. “Let’s begin with the intro of the song. The dance moves for the first verse and pre-chorus is something I will work hard on when I get home.” He moves away from the wall mirrors and heads over to his bag, and picks up his phone he had placed near his bag. He opens up the audio file Chan texted him, plays the first few seconds of the song that was the intro, and starts crafting the moves in his head. 

“Alright, I’ll teach the intro now.” Minho turns to them; the looks on their faces make him feel so awkward. He wants them to stop staring at him like that and be more relaxed. Maybe a smile would fix their moods. He decides to give them one. “Forget about earlier. Let's focus on dance.”

Their moods stayed the same. However, even if the atmosphere here was very awkward, Minho managed to pull through the rest of the class with the fakest smile. He taught them the intro, made them memorize it, then made them clean up their moves and had them be in sync. They did amazing. 

“Thank you for teaching us!” Changbin enthusiastically says, “See you tomorrow!”

“Thank you, Minho, you are such a great dance teacher,” Chan says, giving Minho an appreciative smile. 

Jisung doesn’t say anything and grabs his bag and heads out of the practice room right away. Chan and Changbin send Minho one last smile - a one showing their remorse for Minho - and Minho sends them a forced ‘I’m okay’ smile - when he wasn’t feeling okay at all - and waves them goodbye. When the door shuts, Minho drops his smile and looks down at the floor, his mind traveling towards gloom. 

\--------

Minho returns to his apartment, takes off his shoes, and approaches his cat that is lying comfortably on the couch. When she sees Minho, she gets up and looks up at Minho knowingly. Minho chuckles, knowing that she is waiting for the usual daily kiss. He kisses her on the top of her head, runs his hand through her fur, and then turns away to head to the bathroom to shower.

As he showers, his mind runs into Jisung. Are they basically over now? He presses his forehead against the icy cold wall. Today has been so difficult for him - no, actually, all of his days had been difficult ever since Jisung stepped in with a different aura. Minho loves Jisung so much, but what crushes Minho’s heart is Jisung’s new attitude. Should he just pause? Minho  _ wants _ to put a pause to everything. Jisung likely wouldn’t crawl back because he has his boyfriend and they are  _ possibly _ committed to each other. Jisung wouldn’t crawl back to someone who had left him, hurt him, and didn’t do him any good. If Jisung still actually loved him, he would’ve run up to him and hugged him and told him how much he had missed him. 

Minho thinks there is no point in sitting back and waiting for Jisung to crawl back to him when the younger most likely wouldn’t. He also finds no point in using his cards against Jisung, the cards that would compel Jisung to feel that he is only for Minho, that he only loves Minho. 

Minho lets out a sigh, the thoughts overwhelming and tiring him. 

When he finishes showering, he wraps his soft, pastel blue towel around his waist and leaves the bathroom. He heads into his bedroom, approaches another door, opens it, and heads inside his pretty walk-in closet, filled with a lot of clothes he had organized based on what they are for. He approaches the section with the comfortable plain clothes, finds a black shirt and joggers, then squats and opens up a drawer and pulls out the first boxer his eyes landed on. He gets changed and leaves his bedroom.

To fuel himself up, he heads to the kitchen and finds something to eat. He goes into his living room, places himself down on his couch, and turns on the tv. He puts on a comedy-drama because a good laugh is something he needs right now after a long stressful day today.

Minho finishes up his food, washes the plate instead of only leaving it in the sink, puts it on the drying rack, and then returns to his living room. He picks up his phone, plays the entire song, the first time he listens to it, he focuses on the beats, the second and third time, he listens to the first verse and the pre-chorus. 

He puts down his phone, places himself down onto the couch, and taps his chin as he thinks of a choreo for these specific verses. He wants it to be super perfect, perfect enough for the song, perfect enough for everyone to be amazed and astonished. Perfect enough that Chan, Changbin, and Jisung would love it. He wants to do his very best.

For hours, without taking a break, he tries and tries, crafts and crafts and finally completes the moves for the two parts of the song. He loves it; he thinks it is perfect, but he hopes the others would feel the same. 

Now he should try creating moves for the chorus; this he wants  _ super  _ perfect. Minho picks up his phone to play the chorus this time. He notices the time at the top corner of his phone screen; it’s four in the morning already. These hours went by so fast, and he didn’t even get any sleep. 

He places his hands against his hips and lets out a sigh. He can’t get any sleep now because there is no time. And he can't work on the chorus because there isn't time for that either. 

Minho thinks he should shower (since he is drenched with his sweat) and get this day over with. He walks to his bathroom - his feet hurting and sore from dancing barefoot - showers, goes to his closet, gets changed, kisses his sleeping cat, and drives to the studio. 

He arrives there at 4:50, unlocks the door and heads towards the black leather couches in the lobby, and sits down. Chan, Changbin, and Jisung come a few minutes before five; they all look so tired. Minho gives them a quick greeting, locks the entry door, leads the boys upstairs and into his dance room. They place their bags down at the right wall and gather up in the center of the practice room. Chan, Changbin, and Jisung stand across from Minho; they are much more awake now.  _ Luckies _ . Drowsiness is heading into Minho. 

“Minho, you look so exhausted,” Changbin points out, “Did you not get any sleep?”

Minho laughs it off; he is fine; he should be fine. Not sleeping isn’t going to do him any harm.  _ He’ll last _ . “No, I didn’t get any sleep because I was so invested in creating the choreo. I didn’t pay attention to the time. It’s no big deal though, I can get sleep at night.”

“Oh my goodness, Minho!” Chan huffs, “You need to take care of yourself!”

“I’ll be fine. Let’s get to work.” Minho forces a smile.

He begins teaching them the choreo. Chan and Changbin are very focused and trying their best. Jisung, however, looks so lost as he copies Minho’s movements. It’s worrying Minho, and he starts to wonder what is going on in his mind. Does Jisung feel guilty about yesterday? 

An hour into teaching, Minho begins feeling nauseous and dizzy; he thinks he needs to sit down for a bit and drink some water. “Okay, let’s have a ten-minute break,” Minho declares and wipes the sweat off of his forehead with the back of his hand. The three of them look so concerned for him. Minho walks away from them, heads over to the wall where his bag lays by, and slides down onto the floor. He pulls his bag closer to himself, takes out his water bottle, and finishes half of it. 

Jisung hesitantly walks over to Minho and kneels in front of him; his dark eyes are surprisingly clouded with so much worry. It’s something Minho didn’t quite expect from this ‘new and changed’ Jisung. “Minho… you look pretty sick... um… are you okay?” Although Minho feels bliss from the fact that Jisung is worrying about him, he also is confused. Where did his sass and rudeness run off to? Where did his ‘I'm hard to get’ role head? Minho smiles; well, Jisung apparently can’t follow his role right now.

“Yeah, I’m okay,” Minho finally replies.

“But you look so exhausted. I think you should cancel this class and get some more sleep,” Jisung states. This is really weird. Why does he suddenly care - oh wait, it could be from Chan’s scolding. Jisung must be forcing himself to be nice to Minho. Minho stares into Jisung’s dark orbs intensely; he needs to find hints and dig out his real emotions. When he couldn’t find anything, Minho resorted to looking at his entire face. His worry doesn’t seem fake. “Minho?” Jisung questions, popping Minho out of his thoughts.

Minho sighs. “You just don’t want to be here and want some sleep for yourself. I didn’t forget about what you said yesterday.” 

Jisung looks offended by those words. “It’s not that! I want you to get some sleep! You look like you are going to pass out.” 

“But I don’t feel like I’m going to pass out.” Minho stands up. Jisung stands up too. Minho walks past him and stops when he feels Jisung grip onto his forearm. What is this? Minho turns his body towards Jisung and looks at the youngers hand that is on Minho’s arm, and then looks at him with a raise of an eyebrow. Jisung gets the idea and quickly lets go of Minho’s forearm. “Hm? Can you explain this?”

Red coats Jisung’s cheeks, the red Minho hasn’t seen in so long. “I- ah- no- you should get some sleep.” 

“What’s with you? Yesterday and the first day you came here, you were being all rude to me and now look at you, you are acting all nice to me.” He didn’t mean to sound rude; his words just slipped out like this. 

He feels curious about Jisung’s motives. Is this pretend because of Chan, or is this real, and he actually cares? It couldn’t be pretend. If it was, Jisung’s cheeks wouldn’t be red. He wouldn’t hold onto Minho’s arm. 

“It’s not my fault you aren’t taking care of yourself. I’m just pointing it out.” 

Minho smiles at him slyly, the same smile Jisung gave him that particular day when he played around with Minho’s emotions. He pushes the younger to the wall, causing him to let out a tiny squeak. Minho puts one hand on the wall next to Jisung’s head and nears his face to Jisung's; their lips almost touching. Minho wants to kiss him already; he would love to; however, he needs to confirm something. He stares into his eyes, Jisung wavers and looks elsewhere. He has the same qualities from a year ago. Jisung is terrible at controlling his emotions and expresses his emotions clearly. Minho understands him well. 

Minho sends him a grin and steps back a little. “You don’t need to point out anything to me. I can take care of myself, thank you very much.” 

“Yeah, right,” Chan states from his spot by the wall. Minho turns away from the completely unsettled Jisung to peer at Chan.

“A few more minutes of break before we return to dancing,” Minho states, changing the subject. 

It’s seven, time to stop the class. Minho turns to them with a proud smile on his face. “Good job today! Um, so if you don’t like coming here early in the morning, then make sure to book ahead of time because my classes fill up easily.” 

“Okay, got it,” Changbin replies, giving Minho a thumbs up.

“And, Minho, make sure to get some sleep. When is your next university class starting?” 

“Ten-thirty.”

“Great, you can get about three hours of sleep.”

“Okay, I will.” Minho smiles at them.

\--------

The rest of today dragged by so slowly. Minho didn’t listen to Chan’s words and didn’t get himself some sleep. It’s not like he could fall asleep - it’s all because Jisung was in his mind. Instead of sleeping the three free hours, he spent the three hours trying to figure Jisung out. What were his intentions? Does he still care? If he does, then that’s a delight; it shows that he doesn’t have any dislikes for Minho. 

Oh, and what about his arrogance and sassiness? Is that his mask? Is it an act? Does Jisung still love Minho? Minho needs to do some more digging or maybe test out his cards to connect the pieces. 

9PM hits, and his advanced dance class with a whole bunch of students comes to an end. Finally, he can go home and get some sleep. Minho doesn’t know how he managed to pull through this long sluggish day, but he did, and he is happy about that. He rushes to his bag, picks it up, and checks around the room to see if there are any of his belongings around. When he sees none of it, he starts heading to the door. Minho stops walking when the door opens.

Surprise consumes him when he sees that it is Jisung stepping inside, looking very timid. Minho also notices that he is holding onto a shopping bag. Did he come here to apologize properly?

Jisung sucks in his bottom lip, showing his nervousness, and Minho patiently waits for him to speak. The younger nears Minho and lets out a sad sigh. “Are you free right now?”

“Yeah, I am always free for you. Did you need to talk to me about something?” 

“What is there for me to talk to you about?” Jisung responds with irritability. Minho refrains from rolling his eyes at Jisung’s response. “I came here with food for you because I thought you’d be hungry. You worked really hard today, and I wanted to thank you. I… can we eat together? It’s not because I want to spend some time with you, though! Don’t get the wrong idea. I just want to eat with you because… because… agh! Because- nevermind! Let’s just eat.”

Minho laughs at Jisung’s flustered state. He is being so cute right now. But why does he want to eat with him, though? Jisung probably wants to spend time with Minho but doesn’t want to admit that. This is so hilarious. Didn’t Jisung say that  _ Minho _ had to show that he is worthy of Jisung’s love? Well, it's the complete opposite now. Jisung is crawling to Minho and seems to care about him. At least Jisung is worthy of Minho’s love. He is  _ always _ worthy of it. 

“Okay, let's eat. I didn’t eat all day today.” Minho chuckles and sits down on the floor. He pats the spot in front of him, and Jisung places himself down across from Minho. 

“I’m glad I decided to bring you food.” Jisung sighs, takes out the food containers from the bag and places them in front of himself. “I bought tteokbokki. I know how much you like it.” He even brought Minho’s favorite food? Minho tries to keep his happiness inside of himself instead of showing it to Jisung. 

“Thank you, Jisung,” Minho responds calmly, and the two of them begin to eat. 

Time to test a card. 

“So, what is your boyfriend’s name?” Minho asks once he swallows. 

Jisung scoffs, “I am not going to tell you his name.”

“Please?” 

Jisung shakes his head. “No, definitely not!” 

“Hmm, how about you describe his features?” 

“You are asking for too much.” Jisung sighs and looks Minho in the eye. “He is tall, I think, around the same height as you. He has straight dark brown hair. His eyes are a dark brown as well and very pretty. I love his eyes. He has soft pink lips, a pretty smile, and a personality I love.” Minho’s heart shatters at Jisung’s words. Soft pink lips? Did he kiss him? 

_ No! Focus on the card! _ Minho reminds himself. 

“Wow, this boyfriend of yours seems pretty handsome. He must be so much better than me. Do you think he is better than I am? His personality might outshine mines…”

Jisung purses his lips, a disappointed expression on his face. “You are still the same, insecure and doubtful.”  _ Doubtful? _ Minho furrows his brows a little. “His personality… um… it’s good in its own way. He is charming, sweet, hardworking. And last but not least, always worthy of my love. He’s shown it plenty of times.”

Minho's throat begins to feel so tight. He lowers his head and focuses on the food containers. “You are truly in love with him… but why are you giving me a chance?” Minho looks back at Jisung and forces a smile. “You clearly love him! He is apparently perfect for you. If you love him so much, why are you giving me a chance? Why do you want me to show that I am worthy of your love? Let’s just stop. You stay with your boyfriend, and I will just move on with my life.”

Jisung stays silent and remains to stare at Minho for a few seconds. Minho doesn’t say anything more; he wants answers from Jisung. “That’s how you feel? Did you decide to give up? Why are you backing away now?”

“Why are you asking those questions? You seem to be in concern. Do you not want me to give up? Do you want to give me a chance? Or are you only playing around with me?”

“Playing around with you?!” Jisung spat, “Is that what you think? I’m giving you a chance because I feel so bad for you. I’m giving you a chance while I am scared!”

“You are scared?” Minho asks worriedly. 

Jisung doesn’t answer. 

Time to push the card inside Jisung; it may or may not cause him pain. The pain is what will tell Minho the answers. “To answer your question, I did decide to give up. I think it’s best if I move on, right? You moved on with someone else, so I should do the same. I actually have a tiny crush on someone. That is why I am not going to try so hard on you anymore. You are happy with your boyfriend.”

Jisung’s mouth falls open, his eyes fill with tears. Minho’s mouth curls up into a smile, he shouldn’t be smiling right now because Jisung is literally about to cry, but Minho feels proud that his card worked. He found his answer: Jisung still loves him. 

Jisung stands up quickly. “I’m done eating. The rest of the food is all yours.” He turns around and starts to walk away. “E-Eat well, and don’t let yourself starve.” 

“Jisung,” Minho calls out for him sternly. The younger thankfully stops. Minho rushes to him, grabs his arm, and turns him around. Without any hesitance, Minho crashes his lips against Jisung’s. The younger tenses up, and then Minho feels Jisung begin to tremble. He wraps his arms around the younger boy’s small waist, pulling him closer against his body. Jisung isn’t pulling away; he is letting Minho kiss him. Minho nibbles onto Jisung’s bottom lip and then pushes his tongue into Jisung’s warm mouth. It’s been so long since they had kissed. His lips feel so good. So, so, so good. 

Jisung is the one to detach a little and he pushes Minho away. Apprehensively, Minho meets with his eyes and finds tears spilling out of them. Jisung shakes his head and steps back. 

Minho's heart just drops to the floor. He is so confused but also significantly hurt. "J-Jisung?" 

Jisung turns for the door. 

"Jisung, no, please."

"I'm scared." 

"What?"

Jisung opens the door and hurries out. Minho doesn't bother rushing after him. His own tears pour out of his eyes. What is Jisung scared about? 


	41. You mean a lot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally, I am back after almost a month of not updating. First of all, thank you for the condolences and thank you for being patient :(( 💖💖💖 I am feeling so much better than before and finally have some of my energy back.   
> This chapter is pretty small and it goes by quickly. I didn't work too hard on editing it because I wanted to update it right away. I hope you still enjoy this chapter ^^

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Mention of rape

Minho fucked up so bad in many ways. He bites onto his bottom lip in anxiousness, wondering if he should chase after Jisung. Would the younger even stop and want to talk to him anymore? For the past days since they met each other again, nothing great happened. They just were at war against each other. They were pushing and pulling and throwing challenges; Minho wanted Jisung to crawl back to him, and Jisung wanted Minho to prove his love. Why can’t things go back to normal?

Okay, no more thinking, no more hesitating; Minho needs to take action. As a caring ex-boyfriend, he needs to know what made Jisung uncomfortable. He can't let him get away like that.

Minho quickly looks at the food containers scattered on the floor. Picking them up would waste a lot of time, and Jisung would be very far by then. Minho will talk to Jisung first and then come back here to clean up.

He rushes to the door and opens it; there stands San with a look of worry on his face. “I saw Jisung-”

“I have no time to talk right now. I need to run after him. I will text you later!” Minho pushes past him and begins to run. He slows down when he approaches the stairs, and carefully yet quickly, he gets down. Once his feet touch the main floor, he sprints out of the building. 

He finds Jisung straight ahead. He hadn’t gone too far; what a relief. 

“Jisung!” Minho starts catching up to him. 

Jisung comes to a pause and turns around to him. “What do you want from me now?”

“I want to talk to you,” Minho responds, “What made you scared?”

“Oh, wow, you care,” Jisung quips. 

Jisung’s remark is annoying Minho, but he tries his best to keep himself calm. “Jisung.” He grabs both of Jisung’s hands, holding onto them tightly. “I do care, and I always will. So, please, tell me what is making you scared? Is it the kiss I gave you… or is it me?”

Tears fill Jisung’s eyes. “Minho, your kiss, it made me…” Jisung lets out a sad-sounding sigh and rips his hands out of Minho’s grip, and he takes two steps back. “Please, just leave me alone. I don’t feel like talking to you right now.” 

Minho doesn’t stop Jisung and watches him walk away. When Jisung is out of his sight, he drops his gaze to the ground. He hates himself so much more now. Why does he have to be this type of person? Why is he never good enough? He can never be a good enough person nor boyfriend to Jisung. He is a failure; he always fails to make Jisung feel loved enough. Is that why Jisung wants Minho to prove his love? Tears spill from Minho’s eyes, his heart wrenching up in pain. 

Scared… there is no other reason for this other than Minho himself. He had always brought fear in Jisung; he always ended up making him uncomfortable. Maybe Jisung doesn’t trust him enough. Not that he  _ should _ . Minho did horrible things to him from the very start. Even if things had never worked out perfectly, Minho still loves him to death and always will.

“Minho.” It’s San’s voice. Minho wipes away his tears quickly and turns to him. “I know you are crying. It’s pointless to hide that from me. I followed you because I was so worried. I’m sorry about what happened; I can offer you words and comfort, would you like that? Or would you like me to give you some space?” 

Minho answers the question by stepping up to San and smooshing his face on his shoulder. He starts sobbing against him. San sighs in dismay and wraps his arms around Minho, his warm body sending Minho the warmth his cold body needed.

After what seemed like long enough, Minho retracts his face from San’s shoulder. A string of his clear snot connecting from his nose to the fabric of San’s black-colored muscle shirt. 

“I’m sorry about this mess,” Minho apologizes. 

“No, you’re good, I don’t mind. Are you feeling better after this good cry?”

Minho feels empty, but to answer San’s question, he shakes his head. 

“I know things aren’t right between you and Jisung, but give it some time. I’m sure Jisung loves you a lot,” San assures.

“I  _ hope _ he loves me a lot,” Minho replies.

San sighs, and after a few seconds, speaks. “Is there anything else I can do for you?” 

“You’ve already done enough by being here and comforting me.” Minho forces a smile. “I’ll head in now, I need to clean up the practice room.”

“I’ll help you!” San quickly says. 

\--------

Minho stares at his reflection in the mirror. He doesn't like how his face looks; he looks so pale and sick. His eyes are red and puffy from all the crying he had done. He turns on the water to cold and splashes the freezing water into his face in hopes of looking like his usual self. When he looks in the mirror, he sees that he still looks the same. He will only look better if he feels better, which at this rate is never going to happen. 

He sighs. Well, time to push through the evening dance classes; it will be hard because he had only gotten two hours of sleep. He spent most of his night thinking about Jisung. He thinks about him a lot nowadays, can that prove his love for him? Is that enough? No. Because what he had been thinking about was how impossible it feels to fix things up with him. 

He exits his bathroom, grabs his bag, slings it on his shoulder, and then kisses his cat on her head. He steps out of his apartment, closes the door behind him, and pulls on his hood.

It is going to be challenging to push through the final class because Jisung is there. Minho could always have someone else from the studio to help him teach 3RACHA. Would that work out? Probably not; they would have to know what they have to teach. Only Minho knows the choreo and knows how to teach them. Plus, he shouldn't switch with another dance instructor last minute. 

The time for the final class of the night approaches, and Minho feels himself dwell in nervousness. Yet again, his thoughts are all about Jisung. Will Jisung even be here, especially after what had happened yesterday? It would surely be good  _ and _ bad if Jisung doesn't show up. Good, because Minho wouldn't have to deal with a presence that affects him so much in the heart and bad, because he wants to see Jisung here, because his presence also makes his heart speed up. 

The three boys arrive, yes, all three. Jisung is behind Chan and Changbin, with a sad expression on his face. Minho moves his eyes elsewhere before Jisung could meet his gaze. Class is undoubtedly going to be awkward. Nonetheless, he needs to be professional - he has to think of Jisung as a student trying to learn instead of thinking of him as an ex-boyfriend Minho so desperately wants to be with again.

"It looks like you didn't get any sleep again," Chan points out, a look of worry on his face. 

"Correction, I had two hours of sleep," Minho responds and switches the topic right away. "Get into position, before we can move on to the next part, I want to see you dance to what I have taught so far." 

"You sound cold. Is there something bothering you?" Chan continues.

"I will go turn on the music." Minho walks over to the monitor, turns on the song, and stands far behind them, looking at their reflection in the mirror. He looks at Jisung and sees that he isn't looking at the mirror at all. 

They finish the dance; Minho pauses the music and walks up to the front. "You guys did great. We can continue with the next part." 

"Minho, you are acting a little weird. I think the two hours of sleep wasn't enough for you. Do you think you can-"

Minho cuts Changbin off, "So for this next part-"

Chan cuts Minho off, "We will not continue unless you tell us what is going on, you look so unhappy."

"Nothing is wrong, now, let's start?" 

"Min-" 

"Let's start,  _ please? _ " Minho replies passive-aggressively. Why do they even care? It's not like Chan or Changbin can help him repair his relationship with Jisung. 

Chan sighs. "Okay." 

"I think I am the problem," Jisung speaks up and looks at Chan, "Chan, I'll leave. You two can teach me the dance once you are free." 

"No!" Minho cries, "You can't leave."

Jisung looks at Minho, raises his brows, and turns away. Why does he have to be like this? 

Minho leaves the practice room and finds Jisung leaning against the wall by the practice room door; didn't he want to leave? He turns his head to Minho. "Minho, why were you acting like that?" Minho doesn't answer his question because he doesn't know how to. Jisung continues to speak, "Yesterday, you asked if the kiss scared me or if it was you. The kiss didn't scare me. I liked the kiss, it felt so good. It's been so long since we kissed." Tears collect in Jisung's eyes. "The kiss made me realize how much I want to be with you again like how we used to. I would love for us to be together how we used to, but I am scared that you would hurt and leave me again."

Minho's heart starts hurting so bad, and the guilt slices his head into several pieces. He regrets his stupid actions; he shouldn't have left Jisung. And now, here they are right now, sinking deep into their sorrows. 

"Jisung... I am very sorry." Minho wants to tell him that he won't leave him ever again and show as much love as he can but would Jisung believe him? 

"You never think before doing and saying things. You always want what you want and never think about how I feel. Right now, you want my forgiveness, but I am not giving you that easily. I know I have been so shitty to you for the past couple of days, that's because, at first, I intended to provide you with revenge. I was so fucking pissed that I was the one to have come back to you. I wanted to mess with your feelings and make you regret fucking leaving me. But guess what? I couldn't keep up with my plans of revenge because I love you so much."

Tears stream down Minho's cheeks from hearing those words. Jisung still loves him? Those words just don't feel so true. If he still loves Minho, then why is he with that boyfriend of his? Minho has to ask. "Jisung... what about your boyfriend?"

Jisung lets out a scoff, his tears falling out of his eyes. "Minho, your eyes are closed, and you weren't thinking deeply of my words. I am disappointed in you. I thought you knew me well."

"What do you mean? I am so confused?"

"Figure it out yourself," Jisung replies harshly, "You don't deserve to get the answers from me. Work hard and fast to get me back. None of this would've happened if you didn't leave me behind. I know things were hard on you because of Daekhwa, and the things he has done against you were all so ruthless of him. But that is not a valid reason for you to throw me away and leave me behind suffering. Minho, Daekhwa also did something horrible to me, and the memory of it will stay in my mind forever. It's a scar in my mind. But did I leave anyone behind? No."

Suddenly the image of what happened that day comes into Minho's mind. The marks on Jisung's neck, the scratches, and the bruises all around Jisung's torso. No... could it be? Minho looks into Jisung's teary-filled eyes. "Did he rape you?" The tears leave Jisung's eyes. 

Jisung laughs humorlessly. “Bingo!”

Minho throat tightens up. He really isn't worthy of Jisung's love. He left him when Jisung needed him the most. Minho is made entirely of selfishness. "Jisung... I'm so-"

"Shut up," Jisung cuts him off and looks down, avoiding Minho's eyes. " _ I'm so sorry Jisung, last year, I was planning on coming back to you, but I met Jeongin, and he told me that you were with someone else. So I stopped my plans of seeing you _ ," Jisung mimics Minho, his voice breaking. He returns his eyes to Minho. "Fuck you. You are a fucking coward! Why didn't you just come back? I would have broken up with my boyfriend right away!"

Minho's heart tears apart. "I told you to find someone better than me, and you did... I just wanted you to be happy."

"How the fuck am I supposed to be happy? What makes you think that I would be happy without you? I love you and only you." 

Minho is sobbing heavily, his whole body shaking. He should've come back to Jisung earlier; if he had done that, they would be so happy right now, they wouldn't be experiencing this huge pain. 

Jisung lets out a sigh, and he wraps his arms around Minho and rests his chin against his shoulder. Minho also wraps his arms around Jisung. "You are right, I am a coward for leaving you behind. I caused you so much pain. I am so sorry for not considering how you felt, and lastly, I'm just sorry for being the shittiest boyfriend to you."

Minho hears Jisung begin to sniffle and feels him tighten his arms around him. "Minho, I'm sorry for being disrespectful to you. I won't be that way to you again, I think I hurt you with my attitude." Jisung pulls away from Minho's body, so many tears were leaving his eyes. "I love you so much, but I don't think... I don't think we are ready for each other." 

Minho nods in understanding, although he is feeling so much pain. Well, it is what it is. "I understand how you feel. We definitely do need some time away from each other and think about what we truly want. Take your time, and if you need me for anything, you know where to find me. I will not run away again, I will be right here." Minho pulls on a fake smile through his pain.

Jisung nods, sighs, and then speaks, "Thank you for understanding. I will head out now." 

Minho watches him leave and lets out a breath out of his sadness. He will have to wait. 

\--------

A week is enough for Minho to feel so much more agony and anxiousness. How long does he have to wait? What if Jisung decides to chose not to be with him again and stick to his own boyfriend. Their relationship lasted about a good year; aren't they so strong?

Minho decides that he has to get these emotions out of his chest before it suffocates him. He needs to talk to someone and hear their opinion. He finds his phone and goes through his contacts, wondering who to text. It has to be either Chan or Seonghwa; he had always gone to those two when he wasn't feeling well. 

Maybe Seonghwa would be the best choice. He is completely understanding and very patient. Minho texts him, asking him if they could meet up and talk. 

Minho goes to the restaurant Seonghwa asked for him to meet him at. He finds the table the other is at and sits across from him. Seonghwa smiles at him happily. "I am starving right now, so let's eat first and then talk later. I can't think properly on an empty stomach." 

Minho smiles a little. "Okay then." 

Seonghwa picks up the menu and scans through it; after picking out what he wants to eat, Minho chooses next. Since he isn't that hungry, he simply chooses ramen. 

They place their order, and to pass by the waiting time, they both decide to talk about random things. Seonghwa spoke about how he recently started getting into painting and loves it a lot. And Minho just talked about his classes and how tiring they were. 

When the food comes, Seonghwa smiles happily, causing Minho to let out a laugh. 

They finish eating, and Seonghwa lets out a satisfied sigh. "I feel so much better now. Now speak about your worries to me."

“It’s about Jisung-”

“Of course.” Seonghwa smiles. 

Minho narrows his eyes at him and then tells him everything that happened - all the way from first seeing Jisung after a year, up till what happened the previous week. 

"I'm so worried. I told Jisung that he could have as much time as he needs to think about what is best, but I fear that he would think it's best to continue without me. I love him, but all I have done was cause him pain. I wasn't the best to him, I just screw things up."

"Minho, don't be sad," Seonghwa says. "Who knows, maybe Jisung loves you a lot and would consider being with you again. Just don't overthink too much. I heard that thinking negatively attracts negative things, so fill yourself with hope."

"I don't know what to think, Seonghwa." Minho sighs. "Jisung made it clear that we aren't ready for each other."

"I agree with Jisung's words. You two are not standing in a good place right now. Consider this, Minho; you've disappeared from Jisung for an entire year. You literally cut ties with him just like that and left. So,  _ of course _ , he will be upset with you, and of course, he needs a lot of time to think. I know you are extremely worried that he wouldn't want to be with you again, but if he chooses not to be with you again, you can start over and be new and improved with someone new. There are plenty of people out there that would gladly be in a relationship with you. I think you are very loveable."

Minho purses his lips and leans back against his chair. Starting over with someone else? How is he going to manage that? Minho wouldn't ever love something as strongly as he loves Jisung. Jisung is his everything. Maybe he would have to move on if Jisung chooses not to be with him anymore. He has his boyfriend, so Minho should do the same. But he will only move on to someone else after hearing Jisung's words.

The two leave the restaurant, and Minnho heads to his car. 

"Minho, wait, I need to tell you something," Seonghwa speaks up. 

Minho turns to him. "Yeah, go ahead."

"I wanted to tell you that, I..." Seonghwa sighs, "Nevermind, have a great day."

"Uh... okay?" Minho laughs. "You have a great day as well, thank you for listening to my words. I feel a bit better now."

"I am always here for you." Seonghwa smiles. 

Minho returns the smile. "Thanks." 


End file.
